0:02

This is a global player

0:04

Original Podcast. Hello!

0:12

And welcome to another Ruff Corner! This

0:14

is the bonus episode that sits in

0:16

between the main we can be weirdos

0:19

apps where I dance schreiber. I get

0:21

sit down with my producer Spooky Out

0:23

and we go through all the weirdness

0:25

is that we've experienced over the last

0:27

seven days. We also go through correspondence

0:30

and more often than not we chat

0:32

to a guest who's doing something odd

0:34

around the world today. Though it is

0:36

a special edition, it's a sort of

0:38

calm down addition, just recalibrate addition because

0:41

I just. Turned forty years old on

0:43

the weekend of had a massive week. We'll

0:45

talk about some of the stuff that happened

0:47

there, but we thought it's time for a

0:49

classic catch up between me and Spooky Al

0:52

who's also been off on his own adventures.

0:54

So I'm that's what today is going to

0:56

be. Our Hayden did. I'm good. Thanks Dan!

0:58

Happy Bloody birthday! My. You. Say

1:01

you good. This. Afternoon as can

1:03

happen because you said your eyes were

1:05

closing It from puppy just and you

1:07

breathe yeah you are like this is

1:09

a really com recalibrate show up. Just

1:11

sprinted him from boots having spent thirty

1:13

quid on a fever medication but it's

1:15

an embarrassing allergy to have I think

1:17

know I dunno if like if my

1:19

granddad was still I the go pour

1:21

yourself to get a lot. Get.

1:23

Dealt pay. So I'm

1:26

I'm fine. I'm I can see now what

1:28

happens to your eyes My eyes of close

1:30

up into a bowl like year eyelids shot

1:32

and you can't open them. So.

1:34

Bar thick. Yeah like that lot of been

1:36

stung by a bay. But. It's

1:39

not an aggressive anthropods, it's Poland during the

1:41

damage which the thing right on. A bit

1:43

embarrassed but I've got kindred spirits out there

1:46

who have probably listening to this with is

1:48

full of com will to. I.

1:50

Would not be embarrassed by that. That is

1:52

a very regular thing, you know. I it

1:55

reminds me of a mutual friend of ours,

1:57

Deborah Francis White Yeah, we have a guilty

1:59

feminist podcast. She had almost

2:01

like a life threatening

2:04

illness, which was

2:06

she was allergic to sand storms in

2:08

Australia. And there was a thing in

2:10

Australia, like sometimes we get these giant

2:12

sand storms and I don't

2:14

know, a few people have this weird

2:16

allergy. It's not a big allergy, but some

2:18

people have it. And I believe Deborah has it. Maybe

2:21

we need to get her on the show and we

2:23

can ask her about it. Okay,

2:25

so you're doing okay, except for

2:27

your freaky, swollen eyeball. Yeah, I'm fine.

2:29

Yeah, happy birthday. So

2:32

yeah, man, I turned 40 on the

2:34

weekend, which is an interesting

2:36

number to get to in life. For

2:38

me, weirdly, this is the only way

2:41

I've thought about the age of 40,

2:44

is that ever since I was about, I don't

2:46

know, in my teens, I'm not even sure when

2:48

this book came out, there was a book

2:50

that was written by one of my favourite comedy writers

2:52

called Dave Barry Turns 40. Right.

2:54

And I just always thought, wow, that's forever

2:56

away. I'm going to read that book when

2:59

I'm 40. When am

3:01

I going to get to that age? It's really odd, right?

3:03

And now I'm in, now I'm there. Now I can read

3:05

this book. That's the whole thing I've been thinking about in

3:07

the decade and the lead up to this as

3:09

well. Ooh, I'm getting closer to reading that book.

3:12

It's always about the book. All

3:16

the way through your mad party where you're just going, you know

3:18

what, I'd rather be in

3:20

a cafe reading a book. Do

3:23

you know what roughly happens in it, or

3:25

is it going to be a complete surprise for you? Not

3:28

the decade, the book. No, no, no. I mean,

3:30

it's just going to be a fun, silly book.

3:32

It is nothing. It's not philosophy or anything. It's

3:34

just he's one of the best comedy writers ever,

3:36

in my opinion. And so I just thought I

3:38

wouldn't understand it. I wouldn't get it,

3:40

you know, until I'm 40. You

3:42

want to get something that's written for your

3:44

age. And now he's got Dave Barry Turns

3:46

50, so I've got that to

3:48

look forward to for the next decade. Oh,

3:51

fantastic. Keep going, Dave Barry. Yeah, reasons to

3:53

stay alive. So listen, it

3:55

was it was an incredible week. The

3:58

week really began on Tuesday night when I got...

4:00

home. And. The doorbell goes

4:02

an eye opener and it's my mom and

4:04

dad from Australia so nice man and I

4:06

had no idea in cinema had organised it

4:09

for them to come out and everyone including

4:11

yourself had been keeping a secret for me

4:13

because you were part of the the said

4:15

the way of sort of making sure that

4:17

I was home in time and I wasn't

4:19

booking stuff in to that poor fan. I

4:22

was like I was booking everything and it

4:24

was the Crab Museum Awards on the Friday

4:26

I was like I've been offered a gig

4:28

in in Czech Republic. I'm going to do

4:30

that. And and ago for two nights and

4:32

she was like you can and she was being

4:35

really for the first time ever like you're not

4:37

doing the sorted they are those I yeah whoa

4:39

what the hell's get off my back Granddad played

4:41

Athena. They'll

4:43

phrase. Down

4:45

and with Iran that. As

4:48

editor doubt that she was. I kind of

4:50

protecting me to be here as much as

4:52

possible for my parents. but listen, I don't

4:54

want to get this is not like a

4:56

diary update on bringing up my parents for

4:58

a reason. Or yeah, they brought some amazing

5:00

stuff with them. So part of my fortieth

5:02

birthday. My. Mum and Dad went

5:04

through all the Olds cassette tapes

5:06

that they have. So these tapes

5:08

that are like from the old

5:10

Sam Cord videos. but we're talking

5:13

forty years ago right? So this

5:15

is from Nineteen Eighty Four. They

5:17

digitized. Bonds. To the videos of

5:19

my life and they showed him to me

5:21

and I have them on a stick with

5:23

me now and we watch the months. Last

5:26

night's a one of the things we watch

5:28

was my birth from aside anger what's good

5:30

spot the lead up to my birth and

5:32

it's hilarious because I am my dad

5:34

are making the same crappy jokes the hallway

5:37

say to the doctors so that was really

5:39

incredible. but then there were two files sitting

5:41

on their that said tibet. Oh.

5:44

Okay, You. remember my only paranormal

5:46

story is that's i was in tibet

5:48

and i watched as my sister raise

5:50

the glass with her eyes into the

5:52

air and saturdays now we don't have

5:55

that on camera unfortunately because no one

5:57

was filming in the room at the

5:59

time Well, you know, I've always said on

6:01

the show and in anywhere that I've talked about

6:03

it, I've always thought, is my

6:06

mind playing with it? Like, did my sister

6:08

lift a glass in the air and shatter

6:10

it? Or have I made that story up

6:12

further down the line and further and further?

6:14

You know, and there's no evidence. We have

6:16

nothing in that period to show us, except

6:18

for all the stories that we tell each

6:20

other. But as you know, stories change and

6:22

they change. Yeah. Anyway, I'm gonna send you

6:24

a little clip, which is just slightly interesting

6:26

to corroborate the story a bit. Now,

6:28

what you're gonna see and listen to, what

6:31

you're gonna hear, is a little video clip

6:33

of my friend Brad, who was the

6:35

brother of Ash, who's been on

6:37

this show. He's been on a rough corner and

6:39

he's one of the three members of the band,

6:41

Empy Yes, who were responsible for our insanely good

6:43

theme tune, which is called Cosmos. So

6:46

Brad is about to light his cake.

6:49

My sister comes over to stand

6:51

over his shoulder. So this is

6:53

a very tiny moment, but just

6:55

have a watch quickly, Al. Here we go. I'm

6:58

gonna put this on. I'm gonna

7:01

put this on. I'm gonna put

7:03

this on. I'm gonna put

7:05

this on. I'm gonna put

7:07

this on. You are kind

7:09

and round. You are kind and

7:11

round. Okay,

7:13

now. Okay. I'm amazed my parents

7:15

caught this, as in, you didn't

7:18

spot it, and when I first watched it, I didn't

7:20

spot it, and I had to go back and watch

7:22

it. So hang on one second. Okay. The only thing

7:24

I'm thinking at the moment is that your haircut then

7:26

is the same as my haircut now. So

7:29

I need to rethink a few things. Okay,

7:31

so at about eight seconds into the

7:34

video, you see Brad

7:36

turn around and clock my sister standing

7:38

over his shoulder. Yeah. And he

7:41

puts his arm around her, and

7:43

he says, China, which is my sister's name,

7:45

China, stare at it. Debbie, who's sitting

7:47

next to him, says, Ooh, yes. And

7:50

then you watch both Brad and me put our

7:52

heads as close as possible to the cake, and

7:55

try and lift it with our eyes. That's what's

7:57

happening. Yeah. Watch it again. and you'll hear it

7:59

again. Okay, watch again. I'll try and isolate the

8:01

audio a little bit. Wow,

8:06

yes, and you're both mimicking the action of

8:08

lifting it up with your eyes and smashing

8:10

it back down again. Yeah, yeah, I'm shaking

8:12

my head at it to try and like,

8:14

and Brad laughs at it. Now, what it

8:16

reminded me was that we weren't told at

8:18

the time by my uncle, and sorry listeners

8:20

who aren't on top of this story, but

8:22

the story goes that it was a haunted

8:24

hotel and we weren't told

8:26

that and my uncle had had multiple

8:29

paranormal experiences in it and this was

8:31

the real kind of crazy moment, but

8:33

we didn't get told until we were back in Hong

8:36

Kong, ages later, that supposedly it was

8:38

a haunted hotel and that's what they thought that

8:40

was. We just thought China had lifted the glass

8:42

up with her eyes, so we weren't scared of

8:44

it. We were amazed by her power. We were

8:46

scared on the night, it was terrifying on the

8:48

night, but in the morning it became just a

8:51

normal thing. But there you go. Wow.

8:53

It just shows me that the memory in the

8:55

morning is that I saw my sister lifting up

8:57

a glass and every, you know, you hear Brad

8:59

say that, China stare at it. That

9:02

is incredible and was this a running theme

9:05

for you guys? Do you still talk about it

9:07

now and everything? Yeah, like as in we, well

9:09

in recent years, we've, it always comes up at

9:11

a dinner party, you know, if my sister and

9:13

I are around together and like, oh, remember that

9:15

time in Tibet? But what I hadn't done was

9:17

asked my uncle or anyone else that was involved

9:19

with it and on the rough corner, when I

9:21

was in Australia, my uncle gave his full account,

9:23

which tallied with the story. So there you go.

9:25

I mean, what a gift. What a gift to

9:27

get that. And it chimes with what you were

9:29

talking to Josh about Josh Whitacombe in The Last

9:32

Step in that you're not sure

9:34

how your stories change because you add and

9:36

you change and you adapt. This

9:38

is a really rare insight into the birth of a

9:40

story. I assume you're not going to send your birth

9:43

video as well. I mean, yep. We're

9:45

watching that now. Okay, so open WhatsApp

9:47

and you will see. No,

9:49

we're not going to do that. I will tell

9:51

you something interesting about my birth, though. This is

9:53

even the bigger. This is the bigger family bombshell

9:56

that my mum has revealed. Oh, okay. My mum

9:58

was telling me she read. dinner the other

10:00

night, Fen and I were sitting around, we were chatting

10:02

just about my life, and she said, um, she

10:06

said that, so, Daniel, I'm the oldest, then there's

10:08

my sister, China, and then there's Bluey, my brother,

10:10

who's the youngest. But they were just talking about

10:12

the fact that when they first got together, we

10:14

were saying you were so young when you had

10:16

me, they were 27, 28, and Fen and I

10:18

were in our 30s, and my mum said, well,

10:21

you know that

10:25

you weren't going to be the first child.

10:27

They had a miscarriage before they had me,

10:30

so they were like, in theory,

10:32

you should have had an older sibling, then it would

10:34

have been you. And then we got into this whole

10:36

chat about would I have existed if the first child

10:38

had come along, because would you have had a baby

10:41

later? And obviously I wouldn't. And

10:43

then we were trying to work out our personalities

10:45

waiting in the wings to come. It was a

10:47

really fun, deep odd chat. So

10:49

then my mum says, because my

10:52

mum in total very sadly had two miscarriages.

10:54

So I was born, and

10:57

then my brother was born. So then

10:59

one day in Hong Kong, and this is in about

11:01

91 or 92, my

11:06

mum's friend says, I need to

11:08

go see a psychic. We're going to

11:10

go see a clairvoyant. And there was

11:12

a very famous clairvoyant in Hong Kong called

11:14

Claire. So they went

11:16

to see Claire the clairvoyant. Okay, no,

11:19

her surname wasn't buoyant. But she was

11:21

called Claire, which is pretty good going.

11:24

And so they went

11:26

to see Claire the buoyant. And she

11:28

was not meant to be there. My mum was

11:30

in the room because this woman was a bit

11:33

scared of going to see this clairvoyant on her

11:35

own. So my mum said in the

11:37

back, and this woman sat there

11:39

and she said, you're gonna have

11:41

a baby. And this lady

11:43

went, oh my god, amazing. And she went, no,

11:46

the woman behind you, she's gonna have

11:48

a baby. And my mum went, oh, no, no, I'm not

11:50

here for this thing. And she said, no, no, I know.

11:52

But you're gonna have a baby. You're gonna have a baby

11:54

boy. And it is

11:56

going to be the baby that you lost before

11:58

you had a baby. your first child. Oh.

12:02

That she knew nothing about this.

12:04

That's what she says to my mum. So my mum

12:06

goes all goose pimply and then finds

12:09

out later that month that she's pregnant

12:12

and that goes on to be my

12:14

brother, Bluey. Oh my goodness. So

12:16

the bombshell is, it turns out

12:19

I'm not the oldest sibling in the family anymore

12:21

because Bluey was the kid who was before

12:23

me. Oh my god. Just

12:26

come in a few slots later. I'm now the middle

12:28

kid. I'm now the middle child

12:30

of our family. Now you can start acting out.

12:32

Finally. You got an excuse. Get off

12:34

my back, grandad. My

12:38

older brother is eight years younger than me. That

12:40

is insane. What does your

12:42

mum think about it? Well my

12:45

mum does like all that stuff. She never

12:47

kind of properly said, I mean, she talks about

12:49

it so cleanly as if it's true and then

12:51

if you really question her about it then she'll

12:53

go, oh well I'm not 100% but like

12:55

she'll deliver it as fact. What

12:57

about Bluey? What about this? Yeah, maybe

13:00

not. So I've got to inform him

13:02

that he's now the number one heir.

13:04

Did you do your usual rational, maybe

13:07

she just could tell you were pregnant

13:09

or about to be pregnant or something?

13:11

Is it sort of a physical sign

13:13

that the clairvoyant could have picked up on?

13:17

No, there wasn't. But at the same time, was

13:19

my mother even pregnant at the time? Was that

13:21

something that she went home and said to my

13:23

father? This lady said this thing. It kind of

13:25

makes me feel that we're meant to have another kid

13:27

and then they started trying for a kid. I don't know.

13:30

I didn't get to that bit of the story so maybe

13:32

I'll suss that out. I mean that's one of the best

13:34

clairvoyant visits ever, surely. I know and

13:36

she's called Claire. It's perfect. Called Claire. Mine was called, well

13:38

I can't tell you what mine was called but it was

13:41

a name akin to Keith and we were in the new

13:43

forest and we did this a good few weeks ago and

13:45

all he told me was that I'm going- Alright, hang on.

13:47

You went to a clairvoyant a few weeks ago. Well no,

13:49

no, sorry it wasn't a clairvoyant, it was a tarot reader.

13:52

Totally different. He was reading our tarot. A

13:54

bit Of Inside Baseball for the listener. Al and I often

13:56

say to each other, oh, have you got anything to

13:59

mention in this episode? Anything weird? Oh no,

14:01

I'm really on our get this one six

14:03

thousand com us. Well look, I was quite

14:05

disappointed. I mean his entire and pregnant. or

14:07

that Yana was gonna be pregnant. Eight. He

14:09

didn't tell me I was that that descendant

14:11

of Ferrets. He just said I was very

14:14

busy and I could benefit from going to

14:16

the forest wants to die ah, and spending

14:18

three minutes meditating. I mean, I could have

14:20

got that off the head space up. You.

14:23

Know on he predicts all that off we can

14:25

be widows from Steve Colgan saying just go out

14:27

for a walk and look at things are up

14:29

since our applies much more by this podcast than

14:31

than by actual therapists or indeed this tolerate a

14:33

Elsa. He spoke a million miles an hour or

14:35

just ended up repeating himself. Could actually run out

14:37

of things to say after about eight minutes and

14:39

we booked a twenty minutes. lots of in an

14:41

effect that I we try to talk as quickly

14:43

as he could so we could understand what he

14:45

was saying and we kept having to ask him

14:47

to repeat itself. just the wind down the clock

14:49

Be up on know into that that was twenty

14:51

pounds I could spend on an act. Putting it

14:53

towards a slight, see this clairvoyant that he's

14:55

still alive. She sounds amazing. See is apparently

14:57

she's famous Early sees a biggie. I'll find

14:59

out her details and we can book an

15:01

assassin and your parents have been over. Have

15:03

you been talking a lot about the woo

15:05

woo side of things? Yeah. I try

15:07

to get them on the So and I'm they didn't want to

15:10

do it. Because the

15:12

nervous you know that my parents they

15:14

listen to the same every week. but

15:16

yeah know they go. Extraordinary story so

15:18

I'm going to try and get down

15:20

as many as possible. My mom's here

15:22

for three months which is amazing. My

15:24

dad goes back in a couple of

15:26

days so going to try not over

15:28

some drinks tonight. Get a few more

15:30

stories because there are amazing things were

15:32

and on my dad's scissors he's a

15:34

hairdresser were blessed by Balinese. Ah same

15:36

and and I'm. ah when they would

15:38

then stolen in the philippines that was

15:40

mentioned eyes at passing comments these were

15:43

blessed and new bad luck would be

15:45

bestowed on anyone who keeps them and

15:47

they were returned for the next day

15:49

despite their ready being a cash reward

15:51

and a threat of police will dot

15:54

was the thing that brought them back

15:56

so he's got a lot of interesting

15:58

tales in that kind of Okay,

16:01

I mean a bit of hidden investigative recording

16:03

around him, I think. Would he be? Yeah,

16:05

and he has. I mean, I will try

16:07

and get this out of him at least.

16:09

I'll just subtly record him. And

16:11

don't anyone say that's illegal? It's my

16:14

dad. Get off my

16:16

back, grandpa. We

16:21

have an episode that's coming up this week on

16:23

Thursday with one of my sort

16:25

of like mentors. You know how you have

16:27

mentors without them knowing? It's just you read

16:29

their stuff all your life and you kind

16:32

of you learn lessons off them. Like Dave

16:34

Barry's about to be for you as well,

16:36

yeah. Yeah, Dave Barry has been one of

16:39

those. But another person is Danny Wallace, the

16:41

amazing writer, Danny Wallace. He

16:43

started off with Dave Gorman doing Are You

16:45

Dave Gorman? Where they both went to try

16:47

and find as many Dave Gormans around the

16:50

world. And he was the producer of the

16:52

Mighty Boosh on radio. And then he went

16:54

into his own with a project called Join

16:56

Me, where he started his own cult after

16:59

leaving a joke advert in the paper and

17:01

built up this big cult basically that he

17:03

used for good. Then

17:06

the movie Yes Man was based on his book

17:08

Yes Man, where he said yes to everything and

17:10

just went around the world trying to change his

17:12

life for the better by not bringing any negativity

17:14

into it. Friends like these,

17:17

where he goes on a school reunion and he

17:19

tries to track down all of his best buddies

17:21

from school from years and years ago, which sees

17:23

him flying to all corners of the world. He's

17:26

just always had projects that I've really admired.

17:28

He's the king of bringing

17:30

stories around within his books. And we

17:32

explore and get to hear some amazing

17:34

examples of that in the episode. Anyway,

17:37

his latest book, which is coming out, which

17:39

is called Somebody Told Me, which is so

17:41

good. It's like vintage Wallace. I was so

17:43

I was crying, I told you when I

17:45

started reading it. Because I was just like,

17:47

man, he's still doing it. And he's taken

17:50

a subject that is so painfully polar

17:52

at the moment and dangerous, which is the

17:54

world of conspiracy. And he's written something decent

17:57

and it is great. And it's funny and

17:59

it's. weird, but

18:01

he opens it by talking about a

18:03

Chinese spy and spies in his life.

18:05

And my dad has one of the

18:07

greatest spy stories because he was in

18:09

Hong Kong and there was a spy

18:11

who was involved in his life. So

18:14

I'm gonna I'm gonna try and subtly record him. I'm

18:16

gonna spy on my dad. Yes, spy on your dad.

18:18

For an espionage story. So we'll see if I get

18:20

that. We'll put that out in the next rough corner

18:22

if I grab it. Anyway,

18:44

you and I have been on some

18:46

adventures in the past few weeks. I

18:48

went to a science documentary festival in

18:51

the Czech Republic. I hung out with

18:53

really intensely brilliant people like a

18:55

dinosaur expert who comes from Field

18:57

Museum in Chicago. I was hanging

18:59

out with a very incredible documentary

19:01

maker who's got a project coming

19:04

out that I can't even reveal

19:06

what it is. But they make

19:08

extraordinary documentaries about very serious things.

19:10

Who are you hanging out with Al? Oh, come

19:14

on. Oh, don't do that to me. Daffy

19:16

Duck, I suppose. Goofy.

19:18

Goofy. Mickey. Come

19:22

on. First, the hay fever in Now This. I

19:25

went to Disney World, okay, because Yanna had always

19:27

had it in her head. She's 10.30, right? Been

19:29

a big couple of weeks for us as well

19:31

for birthdays. And she'd always had it in her

19:33

head from a young kid that she'd have her

19:35

30th in Disney World. So

19:38

for the money I could have used to see at least three

19:40

wonders of the world, we went to

19:42

Disney World. And I'm a bit ashamed of myself. I was

19:44

a bit of a cynic, Dan. But actually,

19:46

when I got there, I drank the Kool-Aid on morning one.

19:48

And I had the best time of my life, mate. I

19:50

had the best time. I'm fascinated

19:52

by it. It is America distilled. And

19:55

it reveals so much about what they've

19:57

done in building up brand America. It's

19:59

amazing. And I learned some really weird stuff

20:01

as well. Did you know that Walt Disney punched an owl? I

20:05

didn't. Was that on a wall like in the

20:08

cafe? Like where did you learn that? We were

20:10

researching on our journey there and you know We

20:12

wouldn't have Disney films as we know them today

20:14

without Walt Disney when he was a tear away

20:16

teen and quite frustrated and

20:19

angry lashing out at an owl punching

20:22

an owl and being so

20:24

ashamed of himself that he did it that

20:27

that led to him almost canonizing

20:30

animals and treating them as sacred and having

20:32

a lot of his films with talking animals

20:34

that have good intentions so That's

20:38

that's that is like part of the

20:40

origins story. We would not have Disney

20:43

Corporation this Absolutely

20:45

giant monster that owns half the

20:47

world's media without Walt Disney

20:49

punching it out. I think it's incredible Incredible

20:51

that is incredible. I wonder if when he

20:53

punched it if the force spun the owl's

20:56

head Just rounded

20:58

around Could I just do disclaimer? This

21:01

is not to be done at home Owls

21:03

are amazing, but I am also quite

21:05

impressed that he managed to do

21:07

it How do you I wasn't

21:09

notoriously high up and fast? No,

21:12

if it flew onto his arm There's suckers

21:14

for an arm held up in a sort

21:16

of butler position You can't just go out

21:19

and put your arm out and an owl

21:21

lands on it that cannot be done He

21:23

wasn't a village fate with an air show

21:25

happening in the background Yeah, all I could

21:28

think of was that classic look of a

21:30

butler with their are about with a white

21:32

serviette hanging over either side There's

21:36

got to be a word for that position that arm

21:38

position I wish if I was still at the

21:40

BBC I'd ask the the Kestrel man because the BBC

21:42

employ a guy who comes with his Kestrel to scare

21:44

the pigeons away So every now and again, I look

21:46

out the window. He'd be there like that with his

21:48

arm out really He'd be waiting for his Kestrel to

21:50

come settle back on his arm What

21:52

was it doing? Scaring away the pigeons because

21:54

I don't think they want the pigeons to crap all

21:56

over the BBC logo Yeah, I've read about these. Wow.

21:58

So you knew the guy who literally

22:01

was the wrangler of that kestrel. Well, I

22:03

approached him a couple of times and said,

22:06

can I have a quick punch? I'm

22:08

thinking of starting a media empire. Here's

22:13

what I know about Disney, which we covered

22:15

in fish a long time ago. I mean,

22:17

I know so much about Disney, so I'm

22:19

desperate to get there anyway, just because Disneyland

22:21

itself is just full of so many weird

22:24

quirks and amazing things. But there's a few

22:26

myths about Disney. One is that his last

22:28

ever words, do you know what his last

22:30

ever words were? Don't

22:34

bother with cars too. No.

22:37

What a disgrace.

22:41

No, he wrote down his last words

22:43

and they found him because he was

22:45

keeled over his desk in

22:47

his office. That's where he died. And

22:49

the last words, which it looked slightly

22:52

like written in desperation, just

22:54

read, the owl

22:56

did it. Actually, that's really interesting

22:58

now that we know the origin story. No,

23:02

he didn't. No, he didn't. Of course

23:04

I'm kidding. I could believe

23:06

that. No, the last two words were

23:09

Kurt Russell. And

23:13

that's the story that goes is that that

23:15

was the last thing he's done. I believe

23:18

that's been debunked since. I think he did

23:20

write on his paper Kurt Russell because he

23:22

was considering him for a Disney movie. But

23:24

the story goes is that his

23:26

last words were Kurt Russell. Kurt Russell, you

23:28

know, he's been involved in weird moments. He's

23:30

one of the guys who was in an

23:32

airplane who reported on the

23:35

insane UFO encounter, supposed UFO

23:37

encounter in America, which was

23:39

the biggest encounter that's ever

23:41

been publicly seen. Phoenix

23:44

lights? Yeah, the Phoenix lights.

23:46

Kurt Russell was someone who spotted it.

23:48

I'm going to I'm going to read

23:50

a direct quote here. I've just brought

23:53

it up as we're chatting as published

23:55

on IMDB. Do

23:59

you miss working with? BBC news journalists Al, do

24:01

you find that their sources were a bit

24:03

more... It was just like this. Was it?

24:06

Okay, cool. Alright, Kurt Russell

24:08

revealed he was the pilot who reported

24:10

the Phoenix Lights UFO sighting. Every

24:13

UFO obsessive knows about the Phoenix Lights,

24:15

a mass sighting that took place in

24:18

As it turns out, Kurt Russell was the

24:20

pilot who first reported what has since become

24:23

one of the best known UFO incidents, something

24:25

he casually revealed during a recent BBC

24:27

interview. I was flying, and

24:30

then in brackets his son Oliver, to

24:32

go see his girlfriend, and we were on

24:34

approach, Russell explained. I saw six lights over

24:36

the airport, an absolute uniform, in a V-shape.

24:38

Oliver said to me, I was looking at

24:41

him, I was coming in, we're maybe a

24:43

half a mile out, and Oliver said, Pa,

24:45

what are those lights? Then I

24:47

kind of came out of my reverie and I said,

24:50

I don't know what they are. So

24:53

I guess he was just so astonished by them is what I mean.

24:56

I don't know. Are we okay here?

24:58

Asked Oliver. I said, yeah, I'm going

25:01

to call in. And I reported it. So

25:03

he didn't think much about the incident, but eventually

25:05

noticed his wife, Goldie Horn, watching a TV show

25:08

about it a few years later, a moment

25:11

that he likens to Richard Dreyfuss in Close

25:13

Encounters of the Third Kind. So

25:15

yeah, Kurt Russell is responsible for the

25:17

reporting of one of the biggest ever

25:20

UFO encounters we've ever had. I'm

25:22

sure there were other reporters, but he clearly was

25:24

a big part of it. So that was seen

25:26

by many more people, is that right? Yeah,

25:28

I believe so. Interesting. I need to read more

25:31

into it, but it's certainly the Phoenix Lights is

25:33

one of the most famous UFO encounters up there

25:35

with Roswell. But here's

25:37

a good Disney fact. There's another myth

25:39

about him, which is that he was put into

25:41

cryogenics, that he was frozen. Yes. That

25:44

he's waiting to come back out. I was waiting to see that. I was saying

25:46

all the time, where is his head? Totally made up. Totally

25:49

made up. He's not cryogenically frozen. And

25:52

that's, I keep trying to

25:54

work out how not to say cryogenically frozen, because

25:57

that I keep getting told by my buddy Rich is

25:59

a term. that is the same

26:01

word over. Oh, cryogenic means

26:03

freezing. Yeah. So you're like, he was

26:05

cryogenically frozen. Like it's it's you just

26:07

say he was put into

26:09

cryogenics or that's just tip for the listener

26:12

there. But that is properly. It's like saying,

26:14

you know, he's frozen, frozen. Oh, OK. Yeah,

26:16

cool. Properly frozen, you know. Yeah. Long, long,

26:18

the long freeze. Yeah. Yeah. So

26:21

he wasn't. That was not true. Absolutely not true

26:23

about Disney. However, what is true is

26:25

that he used to put his testicles on ice

26:29

so that he could up his sperm count. So

26:31

his head, his head's not on ice,

26:33

but for many evenings, his balls were.

26:36

Is there any science behind that? No, no. His

26:38

wife believed she I think his wife had heard

26:41

somewhere that the sperm count would be upped if

26:43

you left your balls on ice. I

26:46

mean, it's a crazy thing out, you know, if you ever

26:48

get into fatherhood and you're

26:50

trying to conceive, you do listen to everything when

26:52

it's not happening. The amount of stuff I had

26:54

to do. What did you do? Did you freeze

26:56

yours? Do you know the story?

26:59

I don't know. Yeah, no. My my

27:03

get in trouble for tell is my wife

27:05

was seeing an acupuncturist. Right. Yeah. She

27:07

was seeing it. She was seeing her specifically because

27:09

we were trying to conceive. And she thought maybe

27:12

if her body was more relaxed and maybe the

27:14

acupuncture could pinpoint some stuff that would help her.

27:16

Bit woo woo. And so one day

27:19

she's having a session and

27:21

the lady says, can I ask

27:23

this? Your husband have hot baths? And

27:26

Fennell says, yeah. I mean, he loves hot baths,

27:28

which I do. Yeah, I love hot baths. She

27:30

said she said it's his fault. Whoa.

27:32

And then what do you mean? She

27:35

said he's he's cooking his sperm

27:37

and they're not useful. So it's his

27:39

fault. So I was like,

27:42

Fennella came home and said, you're not having any more hot baths and

27:44

you can only have lukewarm showers. Now, to

27:47

sort of be fair on that, there are

27:49

a lot of people I know who have

27:52

literally gone from not having a baby to

27:54

having a baby by the changing of a

27:56

basic diet and stopping to have hot showers

27:58

off the back of a. doctor's recommendation.

28:00

There is some medical stuff behind

28:02

that that suggests that that does

28:05

help. However, this was not

28:07

a doctor. This is not someone who's ever

28:09

met me. This is an acupuncturist who's now

28:11

banned me from having baths. Oh my God.

28:13

And I'm not allowed to have a bath

28:15

until we conceive. So

28:17

I'm like, this is insane. And then Fenella

28:19

says, well, we'll find out for proper because

28:22

she's booked you a sperm test. And I'll

28:24

say, what? She's called up a

28:26

hospital and she's booked you to go in and give

28:28

a sample. And then we'll

28:30

find out whether or not they're all lazy

28:32

sperm or if they're any good. Wow.

28:35

So I'm like, what the fuck is

28:37

going on? So I have to go

28:39

because you do this weird shit. Yeah.

28:42

And I go and I give a

28:44

sperm sample. And so we're waiting

28:46

days and days. So then I call up the hospital when

28:48

they say it's going to be like three days till you

28:50

get your results. I call them

28:52

up and I say, hi, my name's Dan Schreiber. I

28:54

gave the sperm sample a few

28:56

days ago. Can I get the results? And

28:59

they said, sorry, sir, you

29:02

were not authorized to get the results. Wait.

29:04

I said, what do you mean? They said, you

29:06

didn't book it. You didn't set up the session

29:08

that has been sent to the person who did

29:11

that. So now I don't even have

29:13

access to my own sperm. This

29:15

would have been an amazing court case. The

29:18

acupuncturist owns my results.

29:21

And if she wanted to, I could never get them

29:23

off her. She could just have them. That's

29:26

a violation of one of the articles of the

29:28

Human Rights Act, surely. Yeah, I know. Right. Now

29:30

it turns out this isn't the first time she's

29:33

pulled this trick because apparently she's

29:35

done this multiple times with people trying to

29:37

conceive over the 20 years that she's

29:40

been an acupuncturist. She just goes, it's

29:42

your husband. It's all the hot bath.

29:44

Get a sperm test. I'll book it.

29:46

And she's been doing that for years and years and

29:49

years to what end? I

29:51

don't know. To prove that it's

29:53

not her acupunctur that's

29:55

changing the situation to, you

29:58

know, they're probably like, why am I not going to do that? I've

30:00

been seeing you for three weeks. Well, it's not

30:02

my fault. This always works It must be your

30:04

husband's hot bath balls. So we have to wait

30:06

for the results from her I can tell you

30:08

still feel a bit cross about that. Do you

30:10

need to relax? Do you want a hot bath?

30:12

Yeah, I need one right so Fenella calls up.

30:14

Fenella calls up and says what were the results

30:17

and this woman said to her Fenella I'll

30:19

be honest in 20 years.

30:21

I have never seen such astonishingly

30:23

strong sperm This

30:25

is unparalleled Oh

30:28

my god, this guy's like got super sperm. That's

30:30

what she said Well,

30:42

I'll tell you one exciting thing that has

30:44

also happened with my parents just to wrap up

30:46

on the sort of fun Weirdnesses with my parents.

30:49

We went to a pub yesterday. There is a

30:52

pub that is in broad stairs, which is a

30:54

seaside town that's

30:56

very near to where I live and It's

30:59

called the Captain Digby. Nice. Very

31:01

cool. And the Captain Digby is

31:03

a pub that has the most

31:05

astonishing Coastal view right

31:07

outside where you sit in the beer

31:10

garden There's a giant castle

31:12

from the 1700s perched on the edge

31:14

of a cliff to your that's on

31:16

your right to your left There are

31:19

these beautiful white chalky cliff faces with

31:21

a rocky break in between The

31:24

bottom of the cliff so you could sort

31:26

of like escape from pursuing pirates through that,

31:29

you know You were being chased. Yeah. Anyway,

31:31

we're in there we're looking up the history

31:33

because it's really astonishing the building itself was

31:35

built in the 1800s early 1800s and It

31:40

was named after a guy called Lord

31:42

Holland's nephew who was called Digby. He

31:45

was a naval guy who is anti-smuggler,

31:47

right? so he used to

31:49

chase down pirates and smugglers and what's quite

31:51

ironic is that the Frontsteps

31:53

that led down the cliff in

31:55

front of the Digby were used

31:57

specifically by smugglers. So the anti-smuggler

32:00

pub was the spot for smuggling. And

32:02

then so years, years later, one day

32:04

a police officer is pursuing some smugglers.

32:06

He gets shot by them. They take

32:08

him as he's dying into the Captain

32:11

Digby where he dies. And it is

32:13

said that he now haunts the pub. Of course

32:15

he does. So I'm going to try and track down

32:17

the owners and see if I can get a real

32:19

life first hand eyewitness account to

32:21

bring to the show. Oh, you definitely should.

32:23

I had a similar experience. I went to

32:26

the prospect of Whitby pub in Whopping. Oh,

32:28

yeah. Yeah, yeah. In London. Yeah. I wanted

32:30

to go there for ages. Finally made it.

32:32

It is amazing. This place was kind of

32:35

similar vibes really. They used to hang pirates

32:37

out the back. That's the headline. Because

32:39

there was a pernicious judge who would

32:41

pretty much always, while he was drunk

32:44

on sherry, send his people to death

32:46

and then watch them from the top window as

32:48

they were hanged just on the banks of the

32:51

Thames around the back of this pub. And

32:53

obviously his ghost haunts that

32:56

room where he'd sit and watch. And he's

32:58

been seen at the top window watching people.

33:00

I was going to go and have a

33:02

look for him, but the tide was high.

33:04

So maybe next time. But that place definitely

33:07

haunted. Loved it. That's two adventures. We need to do our

33:09

big list of adventures that we're going to do. Because you

33:11

could come down. We could go to the Digby. It's really

33:13

nice. Oh, yeah. That'd be so much fun. Yeah. And come

33:16

over to the prospect of Whitby. And if anyone listening has

33:18

been to the prospect of Whitby or...

33:20

Is of the prospect of Whitby. Yeah.

33:23

There are ghost tours that they run there. So

33:25

I'm quite fancy going to one of those. Yeah.

33:27

Hey, listen, we've been yapping on and yapping on.

33:29

We should probably wrap up in a second, right?

33:32

Yes. I should say that the first

33:34

ever annual Funniest Crab Award joke ceremony

33:36

happened on the Friday night,

33:39

April 26th. It was absolutely awesome.

33:41

I got to MC the evening. Yay.

33:43

I was there. We had 10 jokes

33:46

that were shortlisted. It was

33:48

a fantastic night. It felt

33:50

like a 1 Am

33:53

Edinburgh show. And So just just an explanation for

33:55

those who haven't heard it. We Did a rough

33:57

corner a while ago where we interviewed the three...

34:00

Cofounders and creators of the Crab Museum

34:02

in Margate, Ned Chase and Parts and

34:04

I'm they wanted serve really amplify International

34:06

Crab Day which is April Twenty Six

34:08

which is not officially day but they've

34:10

they've created it to be and they

34:13

wanted amplified by creating a hunt for

34:15

the funniest crab joke. So we put

34:17

a calling out to the world which

34:19

I help them to do Ah which

34:21

was to say do have a club

34:23

job submitted to us and we will

34:26

find a winner We put a panel

34:28

together of judges which included Sally. Phillips

34:30

and Harry Hill and from with the

34:32

weirdos lands allow some. ah he. There

34:34

was a classroom full the kids from

34:36

our Ramsgate Arts primaries and was it

34:39

was amazing. No such thing as a

34:41

face. Were one of the judges as

34:43

well and their job was to then

34:45

pick their three favorite checks. Then there

34:47

was a final boss panelists and that

34:49

was the crabs themselves. The Crabs of

34:51

Margarita. The twists Now is the twist

34:53

is a video with some sort of

34:56

will go online to say how we

34:58

did that. It was filmed by. Alec

35:00

Spell of Ah Q I have very

35:02

good friend of mine. so incredibly funny

35:04

and our we got our winner and

35:06

the winning joke was Joke Z. The

35:09

joke goes Man walks into a restaurant

35:11

with a crab under his arm and

35:13

says d my crab cakes manager says

35:15

yes we do. Good. Says the

35:17

man. Because. It's his birthday that

35:20

added a death. Spiral

35:22

a silly but ago most votes and

35:25

the crab six it is they're winning

35:27

joke and we had as a trophy

35:29

made up of Wwf style belts, gold

35:31

and bell. It looked amazing and was

35:33

presented to the winner by the Mayor

35:35

of Margate. Wound up with all of

35:38

his billing as well. It was an

35:40

incredible night. is actually a video of

35:42

the online I'll put a link to

35:44

be in the discord and put a

35:46

link of it's all Not. my my

35:49

instagram as well you can watch the

35:51

entire ceremony was wild santa mcguire from

35:53

red handed with their see came up

35:55

and read the final top ten jokes

35:57

with me really at it was wonderful

35:59

say That's something fun to check

36:01

out the crab guys are the funniest

36:03

humans alive when you watch this video

36:05

You'll see why and have

36:07

they published a lot of the short list of jokes

36:10

like can you go? Yeah, I think I think follow

36:12

crab museum on Instagram and you'll see a lot of

36:14

stuff They're gonna put all the photos up from the

36:16

evening. There's lots of stuff coming out this Thursday I

36:18

think if not sometime this week, so do check it

36:21

out really because I'm gonna pinch them Yeah,

36:24

is that a no? Okay

36:31

We need to wrap up out I got to

36:33

go meet up with my parents They've only my

36:35

dad's only got a few more days in town.

36:37

I'll hopefully we'll get the spy story off him

36:39

So tune in to the next rough corner Let's

36:41

see if we can get that But otherwise if

36:43

you want to send in your stories your encounters

36:45

anything you've been reminded of have you had an

36:47

encounter with a spy? Let's hear Danny Wallace's episode

36:49

that's coming up this Thursday and see if it

36:51

reminds you of anything you want to talk about

36:53

Send it to me and we can be weirdos

36:55

on Instagram or you can go to the discord

36:57

There's a link in my bio to get you

36:59

there and also of course coming up on May

37:01

13th Is the first ever we can be

37:03

weirdos live show al you're gonna be there I'm

37:06

gonna be there Reese Darby our guest is

37:08

gonna be there. It's gonna be an awesome

37:10

night I might be giving my poo over

37:12

to the head of the National Pooh Museum

37:14

on the Isle of Wight if he manages

37:16

to make It over I think

37:18

a few other of the past weirdo guests

37:20

are gonna be in the crowd It's gonna

37:22

be an awesome night, and I believe there

37:24

were standing tickets left, which is odd But

37:27

it's a thing apparently so if you want to

37:29

get into the room buy those otherwise it's sold

37:31

out But that's it for now

37:34

We'll see it on Thursday with our episode with

37:36

Danny Wallace as he fills out the batshit list

37:38

and then back next week for Another rough corner.

37:40

We will see you then and until then stay

37:42

weird Thanks

37:51

for watching! This

38:16

is a Global Player Original Podcast.