0:00

The quality of me as a human matters to me, not

0:02

as me as a businessman. I'm aware that I

0:04

love it. I love being an entrepreneur, but it

0:06

is not how I f***ing think about myself. Right.

0:08

It's my favorite game. It is my passion. It's

0:10

not who I am. Entrepreneur

0:13

and Vesta, a New York Times bestselling

0:15

author, a founder of VaynerMedia, Digital Media

0:17

mogul Gary Vaynerchuk. Please welcome Gary

0:20

Vaynerchuk, Gary Vaynerchuk. I

0:23

remember when I was first popping off in that 2007-8 Twitter world, a

0:26

lot of people were like, the wine guy's gonna be around just

0:28

for a year. This is too much. It's all

0:30

sizzle, no steak. Money and fame

0:32

and success doesn't change you. It

0:34

exposes you. I just have

0:36

a very simple question for people. Explain to

0:39

me any justification to s*** on

0:41

another human being. If

0:43

you're not happy, if you're anxious, if you're feeling

0:45

a lot of pressure, the answer is ironically, you

0:47

have to start doing the opposite of everything you

0:49

naturally wanna do. That's the other thing that I

0:51

don't understand what these people are doing. As

0:54

if anyone on earth is perfect. Is

0:56

perfect. You wanna have a real moment in this

0:58

podcast? Everybody, I'm looking at all the f***ing cameras

1:00

right now. I'm

1:03

sorry about that. I'm sorry. But I was going for

1:05

a fact. You said you wanna live to 105. Yeah. You

1:08

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Again, head to

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netsuite.com/greatness. Welcome back

3:42

everyone to the School of Greatness. Very excited about our

3:44

guests. We have the inspiring Gary Vaynerchuk in the house.

3:46

My man, so good to see you. It's

3:48

been 15 years since we met each other. You

3:52

have continued to be a leader

3:54

in the creator economy, entrepreneurship, emotional

3:56

intelligence and so many other things.

3:58

So I wanna... I acknowledge you first Gary

4:01

for your continued evolution,

4:04

innovation and leadership as a human

4:06

being and also your friendship.

4:08

You have thousands of connections

4:10

that you probably text with on

4:12

a monthly basis and you

4:14

have a lot of people in your inner

4:16

circle but then outer circle, right? And

4:19

I would say I'm someone like in the inner outer

4:21

circle, you know, we don't see each other a lot

4:23

but when we connect, we connect and we have a

4:25

lot of memories together and I'll

4:28

always appreciate that when something happens in my

4:30

life, you reach out. So I want to

4:32

acknowledge you for just being on

4:34

top of things, reaching out when things really matter.

4:36

I got a lot for you. Yeah,

4:38

I appreciate it. And one of the

4:41

things I want to talk about first in today

4:43

is you've got a lot that's always happening but

4:45

one of the things is this book called Day

4:47

Trading Attention. Yes. It's

4:49

seen and we were just talking about this

4:52

right before we started. You're asking me, you

4:54

know, what's new for you? I said feeling

4:56

emotionally peaceful and abundant and loved is

4:59

new for me because in

5:01

a world of online

5:03

marketing, social media, entrepreneurship, business,

5:06

competition, I was

5:08

driven to grow, grow, grow and

5:11

I was always accomplishing and

5:13

getting results. But in the last,

5:15

you know, year, there's been changes, ups, downs. For

5:18

the first time, I feel

5:20

peaceful about me and love

5:22

myself even if I'm not

5:24

growing at the rate that I always have financially.

5:26

Even if you rank 113 instead of 7. Exactly.

5:30

My question for you to start is it

5:32

seems like people are more stressed and

5:34

overwhelmed and trapped than ever

5:37

trying to keep up with the algorithms,

5:39

likes, views, changes

5:41

in platforms, one platform being hot then potentially

5:43

TikTok going away in a few months. Who

5:45

knows? Right. And

5:47

I think that's the hamster wheel of needing

5:49

to grow and create, create, create in order

5:51

to be relevant. Yes. Is

5:54

that sustainable and how can people stay

5:56

healthy and love themselves when they're

5:58

hot and when they're not? How do

6:00

they not chase the hamster wheel of

6:02

success with social and

6:04

stay more sustainable? Great question.

6:07

Is it sustainable? Yes, if

6:11

you're in the place that I think

6:13

you're emerging into, where

6:15

you enjoy it and it

6:17

doesn't define you, and

6:20

you can love yourself and you're

6:22

good, whether you're making

6:24

a million dollars a year or 40,000

6:26

a year, whether you've got a million followers or 40,000,

6:28

or the thing that you're going through that I go through

6:31

and many others, when you have momentum,

6:33

you're hot, hot, and

6:35

then you're not as hot and you go

6:38

up and down. So I think it's remarkably

6:40

sustainable. I also believe that 99%, 97%, 90%, I

6:46

don't know what the number is, are not in

6:48

that place yet. They're not in

6:50

a place where they don't live for outside

6:52

validation. They're not in a place where they've

6:54

hit that maximum place of

6:56

self-love. I talk a lot about my

6:58

mom. It's very clear to

7:00

me that whatever she gave

7:02

me in DNA and how she parented me and

7:05

the circumstances of the environment I grew up in,

7:07

Edison, New Jersey in the 80s, created

7:10

a perfect storm where my relationship with

7:12

me was so good, even in

7:14

high school. I think about it now a lot. I

7:16

didn't realize it when I was first coming up

7:18

and getting notoriety. I didn't realize

7:21

how insane in hindsight, and Dustin who's filming

7:23

me right now, he

7:25

also grew up in Jersey, he really understands what I'm

7:27

about to say, even though I'm older, he really knows

7:29

what I'm saying. Like 90s, late 90s,

7:31

early 2000s, like

7:34

high school in Jersey in the 90s, 90 to

7:36

94 when I was there, that

7:39

was like real kind of

7:42

hardcore, meaning

7:45

it now blows

7:48

me away in hindsight that I

7:50

did not, not only did I not succumb

7:52

to peer pressure, that

7:56

it didn't even begin to gain momentum

7:58

with me. Really? I feel

8:00

like the only one in high school that this didn't happen

8:02

to. No, I think there's others, but this is why I'm

8:04

trying to tap into it. So for me, what

8:07

you're entering, I believe, is

8:10

what I got lucky in. I

8:12

hate luck because people love to weaponize

8:15

it against people they envy. And

8:18

it's a real lazy trait, but there's

8:20

a million variables that are luck or serendipity or whatever

8:22

you wanna call it. But your parents instilled that in

8:24

you and gave you that skill. My mom, you know,

8:26

my dad instilled other things in me and honestly, I

8:28

was with my mom predominantly from 14 and

8:31

then ironically, the time I'm talking about now is when I started

8:33

to really get to know my dad because I had to work

8:35

in the liquor store a lot of hours. I

8:39

just liked myself and didn't think,

8:42

you're a perfect example. You're like,

8:45

I was four foot 11 the day I walked

8:47

into high school. I was six three,

8:50

not six four. So like, I'm

8:52

using you because you're a perfect cop. Even

8:54

if the most handsome big dude who

8:58

was in my grade made fun of me.

9:01

And I remember within the first couple of

9:03

weeks, big shout out, if anybody can find

9:05

Paige Parlow. Paige Parlow was two years

9:07

older than us or maybe one, all my

9:09

high school friends are about to laugh. She was such a pretty girl.

9:11

I think she was a junior, we were freshmen, right? And

9:14

she had like cliche, this is literally September

9:16

1990. Her boyfriend is

9:18

like a smoker dude, like literally like a

9:20

John Travolta type of dude. Another Jack, yeah,

9:22

yeah, yeah. Literally out of central casting. I

9:25

somehow get lost. I

9:28

do literally like week one or two, get lost of

9:30

which class I'm going to. So I'm like two, three

9:32

minutes after the bell rang and I'm like walking the

9:34

hall trying to fake, like literally like a movie. And

9:38

they're outside. I already

9:40

know who those two people are. And we're only

9:42

a week or two in. They're like the legends

9:44

of high school, yeah. And literally

9:47

they're outside one of either

9:49

her or his locker making out as

9:51

I walk you by. Everything in my

9:53

life is just walk by and if

9:56

nothing happened, right? Sure

9:58

enough, I get by. And it's

10:00

literally a movie. It's literally a coming of

10:03

age movie. He goes, hey.

10:06

I turn back, he goes, the nursery

10:09

school's right over there. Wait,

10:11

you have to understand why this is extra funny.

10:13

Our high school was a vocational high school.

10:16

And I don't know if you know what this is, but vocational

10:18

high school is, because we were in rural New Jersey. I moved

10:20

from Edison to Hunterton County. We had a

10:23

auto body shop, we had a salon,

10:25

and we had a daycare in

10:27

our high school. And some of

10:29

the juniors and seniors were taking

10:31

classes to become teachers. So

10:34

I was literally ironically, I didn't know where it was at

10:36

the time, I'm telling you, it's the first two, three weeks

10:38

of high school. He goes, hey kid. And

10:41

they laugh and I'm like, ugh. Like literally,

10:43

but here's what's so funny about it. This

10:45

is the most meta moment. I

10:47

literally said to myself in that moment, not I'm a

10:49

piece of shit or I'll never be cool or I

10:51

suck or I can't wait to grow or whatever. I

10:55

said to myself, what's happening right

10:57

this second? I'm like, that's

11:00

gonna be a really funny story one day. I

11:02

literally actually at 14 years old

11:05

said that, and here I

11:07

am 34 years later, delivering

11:09

on the promise I made to myself about that

11:12

moment. So the answer

11:14

is, is it sustainable? Of course it is.

11:16

But the only thing that is sustainable

11:18

is when your relationship with yourself is

11:21

so good, you can deal with the

11:23

death of a parent, a partner, even

11:26

the worst extreme, a child, you can deal with

11:28

getting laid off, you can deal with, breakups,

11:32

how about athlete life that you grew up

11:34

with. Who are the kids that are bound

11:36

to be professional athletes? Jay Williams was

11:39

supposed to be the best basketball player, got into a

11:41

motorcycle accident. Obviously he has a great career, he's a

11:43

great entrepreneur, he's on TV, he's a good dude, but

11:46

that's maybe not what he thought his whole life was gonna

11:48

be for the first 20 years of his life or the

11:50

ones that don't make it or the ones that come from

11:52

a wealthy family and then the mother or father

11:54

die of a heart attack, it spins out

11:56

the whole family or they get raided by

11:58

the FBI. People have things. My

12:01

mom lost her mom at five. My dad lost his dad

12:03

at 15. Those are

12:05

game changing moments. How does one deal?

12:08

That they were in a good place. Last

12:10

night I had dinner. One of the people

12:13

at dinner was talking about their

12:15

younger sister passing away. This woman was in her 60s.

12:18

She was talking about her 58 year old sister

12:20

and she was talking about the children and she's

12:23

talking about the children in their 30s just

12:25

on full tilt entitlement. She

12:28

literally said quote unquote, one

12:30

of them is waiting for the father to pass so they

12:33

can inherit the money. Oh man. I

12:35

think about those things and I'm like, what does

12:37

that? That's the extreme in the other direction. I

12:40

love myself. Listen, you know this about me.

12:42

You brought it up in the intro. I

12:45

love being nice. But I'm

12:47

in, of course I'm nice because I'm good with me.

12:51

Of course most people that aren't nice because

12:54

they're not good with themselves. So

12:57

for me, this is why entrepreneurship has

12:59

been so easy. I'm not scared to

13:01

lose. And it is the

13:03

direct correlation. Your

13:05

capacity with losing has an

13:07

incredible correlation to

13:09

what you're gonna achieve as an entrepreneur

13:12

sustainably because

13:14

when you're deeply insecure

13:16

and it's not good, you equally

13:18

might create massive success because you're

13:20

using it as the makeup. If

13:23

I put up the points on the board, everyone

13:25

will think I'm good. Even though I

13:28

secretly don't think I'm good. And what happens

13:30

when you succeed but you're not good with

13:32

yourself? Exactly what you know what happens. You

13:35

and I now have way more than you but you're starting to get things

13:37

on at the end. It's not the last time I started in New York

13:39

for a second. I'm like, uh, so it's about

13:41

this. Yeah, we're maturing and you know this. Many

13:43

of our contemporaries or guys and gals we looked

13:45

up to, we've watched get

13:47

to high levels and collapse. Yeah,

13:50

crash. Crash. Some of it

13:52

the public knows because it's very famous. Others we

13:54

know where like someone was in

13:56

our circle speaking or writing books, like made a

13:58

lot of money. But like. gone

14:01

through really bad stuff and drug problems

14:03

and worse and like we know and

14:06

that's what happens. Money

14:08

and fame and success and followers

14:10

doesn't change you, it exposes you,

14:14

right? And so I think for me it was the

14:16

serendipity of

14:21

being in that good place and it's probably why

14:23

I, if you look at my journey, it's funny,

14:25

Day Trading Intentions is a funny book for me.

14:27

It's a little bit back to 2009 Gary, it's

14:29

very tactical. Social's changed a lot

14:31

and I just wanted to give people like

14:33

here it is, like go run for the next 24 months.

14:37

But my last book, 12 and a half,

14:41

and you know this again because we've been together through this

14:43

journey, somewhere along

14:45

the line, six, seven years

14:47

into giving tactical black and white marketing

14:49

and business advice that will work, I

14:52

got to a place where I'm like, wait a minute, oh,

14:55

people aren't doing this not because they don't know

14:57

what to do, it's because

14:59

they're not in a good place from a perspective, from

15:02

a mentality, from an internal

15:04

place and that's when my content started to

15:06

evolve into security kind of sort of like

15:09

that's. Emotional intelligence, generosity, yeah, yeah. I didn't

15:11

even know what the term was. Not tactics.

15:13

Yeah, because I thought when I came out 2009,

15:15

10, 11, 12 that

15:18

I just built from 96 to 2000, that

15:20

was the other thing that was a little bit different about me in that era. I

15:23

was also someone who had already really done a lot. And

15:26

so I was talking about did, not that

15:28

might happen. And I think that's what made

15:30

me explode pretty quickly. Besides ability to communicate

15:32

in that kind of level of

15:35

communication charisma, there was meat there.

15:37

I remember, you may remember this, this is actually

15:39

an interesting question to you. I remember

15:41

when I was first popping off in that

15:44

2007, eight Twitter world, I'm so animated, I'm

15:46

so over the top. What

15:48

I always used to laugh about, similar to getting made

15:50

fun of that day in high school was a lot

15:52

of people were like, oh, this guy's gonna, the wine

15:54

guy's gonna be around just for a year. This is

15:56

too much. It's

15:58

all sizzle, no steak. And

16:00

I would wait those tweets because I go and give

16:02

a talk at the affiliate summit and

16:04

I would make the comments and someone's like This guy won't even

16:06

be around in a year and it was very similar to getting

16:09

me fun of in freshman year high

16:11

school I'm like, I can't wait to

16:13

recall this because I know who I am

16:16

I'm an incredibly patient operator

16:20

and I build slow and Quietly

16:24

VaynerMedia VaynerX has 2,000

16:27

employees. That's incredible, man. I thought was only

16:29

a thousand It's 2,000 employees. You were there.

16:31

I remember there was like I can't remember

16:36

So-called or something sunshine sweets down on the

16:38

process. I remember you got a ping-pong table

16:40

I like four people around the table. That's

16:42

right. Yeah, that's right Like three

16:45

four clients right trying to figure it

16:47

out and now that's a 350 million

16:49

dollar a year business It's a real

16:51

business amazing and that was built from

16:53

me and AJ and Mike Lazaro's buddy

16:55

media conference center This office six months

16:57

before you saw us down in the

16:59

process and that rent for the first

17:02

year was free Because I

17:04

traded Marketing services for the

17:06

space because the story that most people don't understand

17:08

about me and I know you know This is

17:10

I don't have any money. Mmm, I

17:12

was built. I built my dad's business, right and

17:14

he didn't pay me much But

17:18

like 60 and 70 thousand a year Like

17:21

watching your city. Well, I was in Jersey

17:23

They're the shitty apartment in Springfield Jersey, but

17:25

it didn't matter and I was able to save money

17:29

Because I worked 8 a.m. To

17:31

10 p.m. Monday through Saturday

17:34

I didn't have time to spend money

17:37

and the internet didn't work the way it did back then

17:39

So it wasn't like I could gamble or buy Like

17:43

like like it was just like a

17:45

very I had a I'm starting

17:47

to realize in my late 40s I'm like and

17:50

my life was weird weird and like like

17:52

like it was weird I

17:54

was like in a very weird emotional

17:57

place, which is amazing like off the

17:59

charts luck just like being an

18:01

athlete or any, or Beyonce's born with

18:03

her voice. She put in the

18:05

work. She developed it, but she had it. LeBron was

18:07

born with what he is. Put in

18:09

the work, and that's how I feel about

18:11

myself. I was given a lot of talent

18:14

emotionally and a lot of entrepreneurial talent,

18:16

and I put in a obnoxious amount of work, and

18:18

here comes the outcomes. But also, just

18:20

like anybody else, I've gone through my journey along the

18:22

way. My last book, 12 and a half, I talk

18:24

a lot about candor being my weakness. My

18:27

kryptonite. Candor, what do you mean by that?

18:29

Well, Gary Vee's candorous. Next hour here, I'll

18:31

fucking shoot. I'll be like, you

18:33

know? And I do that well

18:35

as Gary Vee, but as Gary Vaynerchuk, when

18:38

I have an employee that stinks, I,

18:40

for my whole career, to this day, it's a

18:43

problem. To this day, I'm a five out of

18:45

10. Me, a 4.7. I'm

18:47

being honest or being? See,

18:49

that even like, honestly, that made me crumble.

18:52

I hate that candor is, no, no,

18:54

no, no, you're right. No, no, you're

18:56

right. Candor is a cinnamon or

18:58

whatever the fuck it's called, of honesty.

19:00

My ability to be honest with an

19:02

employee that has been around my company

19:04

for a period of time, and now

19:06

I like them, who's

19:08

underperforming. Wow, that's so hard.

19:11

Has been the disproportionate kryptonite

19:13

of my career, which surprises

19:15

people, because

19:17

Gary Vee on stage or on podcast, that's

19:19

my strength, but I'm talking to the world.

19:21

When it's one on one and you care

19:24

about someone and I- I know fucking everything

19:26

about them. I know that their dad this and their

19:28

mom this, and I know they're having struggles at home,

19:30

or I know they came in and had $50,000 in college debt,

19:33

and I'm like, oh, like, and so I've

19:35

realized one of my great weaknesses of

19:37

my career is

19:40

that I bleed too much charity

19:42

into my work. And

19:44

one of our biggest connection point in our

19:46

friendship is, you know, Pencils

19:48

of Promise, right? And I've

19:50

done a good job in doing charity

19:53

work, but I haven't been able to

19:55

take off, like, I really envy the

19:57

people who, like, don't bleed

19:59

in. and charity has been an element

20:01

of my investing. I've invested in companies

20:03

that if my life depended on it,

20:06

I would never have invested in. I

20:08

100% knew it wouldn't work, but

20:11

I wanted to write a 20 to 50,000 dollar check because

20:13

I liked the person. I have

20:15

kept many employees within my companies for a

20:17

long time. And here's the worst part. I've

20:19

taken the brunt of that because

20:22

it's lost profit, right? It's

20:24

reputational damage. People are like, why is Gary

20:26

keeping around Sally? And

20:29

then what ends up happening is eventually there is

20:31

a moment where that person goes, but it's always

20:33

been sloppy. So the lack of, and all

20:35

of a sudden- A year or two after they should have, yeah. And

20:37

then I'm the bad guy and it's all

20:39

because, and so candor has been something I've

20:41

developed a lot more, a

20:43

lot more. It's still- So challenging.

20:45

Back to, we were joking about, I just read

20:47

the audio book. Like there

20:50

are a couple of things

20:52

on earth that come incredibly hard to me.

20:54

One is candor to nice people when

20:57

I have to let them go in a business. And

21:00

two is reading my audio book. I know,

21:02

man. Which is a grind. Although

21:04

you mentioned you're in your late 40s now, is that right?

21:06

I just turned 41. And

21:09

I'm 40 years. A couple weeks ago, 48. If

21:11

you could go back to 40. Okay. And

21:14

think about all the things that

21:16

you struggled with in the last, I

21:18

guess, eight years. Yeah. You've

21:20

had, you know, people see your wins and

21:23

successes nonstop. Like all the exits and investments

21:25

and the growth, the VaynerMedia and the books

21:27

and New York time vest, NFT. All these

21:29

different things that people see that. But

21:32

for you, what do you think of the two

21:34

or three things that have been beyond candor? Your

21:36

biggest struggles? Or the hardest

21:38

things you've had to overcome? One

21:44

of my favorite parts about my job is that I

21:46

get the opportunity to travel a lot. And in fact,

21:48

I'm recording this right now while I'm in Mexico. And

21:50

actually I was thinking about something that I wanted to

21:53

share because I get a lot of questions from so

21:55

many people about different side hustle ideas. So

21:57

here's one for those of you out there that are

21:59

on the... go a lot like I am

22:01

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22:03

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22:21

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22:59

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23:01

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24:00

hire? One is very real

24:03

right now, which is

24:06

I am atrocious

24:08

at smelling the roses because

24:12

the whole game for me is smelling the

24:14

roses. However, I'm

24:16

sensing like what

24:18

I've enjoyed the memories of the

24:21

more extreme version of smelling the roses.

24:23

Let me explain what I mean. Yeah,

24:26

so when I have wins, I

24:29

don't celebrate them. Like there's no,

24:31

like in my world, we just landed a $20 million client.

24:35

It's a lot, it's a big client. And

24:38

a bunch of the people at Vayner, they've worked at other

24:40

places. They're like, so when's the, so

24:42

when are we doing like the celebrations? And

24:44

I'm like, what do you, I don't, my brain's like, I

24:47

don't understand what you're saying. Right?

24:50

And not that like I'm like some tyrant, it's

24:52

almost like just my energy goes to

24:55

like problems. As

24:57

I continue to go through my

25:00

own journey, it'll be very clear that I

25:02

was blessed with many things as a child, but

25:05

I was also burdened with

25:07

some. Like I was the oldest

25:09

from the old country. I mean, when I tell

25:11

you since the time I was five years old,

25:13

I remember being greened in my head. Like responsibility,

25:15

responsibility. Take care of your sister, take care of

25:17

your, like my mom, and I admire that from

25:19

my mom. Do I also understand

25:21

like anything, if anything's too extreme one or

25:24

the other? Between that and then don't

25:26

forget at 14, I come into

25:28

my dad's business. By the time I'm like 15 and

25:30

a half, when you still used to even use a

25:32

half, it became clear like

25:34

I was a talent. Back to

25:36

the great Kobe Bryant that you got to do a podcast with. We're up 20,

25:38

30% this year because

25:40

you're in there fricking razzle dazzle people. So guess what happens?

25:42

Now I'm 17 and 18 and 19 and

25:45

I'm feeling the financial burden. Right?

25:49

And now that was, I want to be very careful here. It's not

25:51

like my father came to me and said, absolutely

25:53

not. I did that

25:55

to myself, but it was hardwired early. And

25:58

my environment's like, my responsibility. You

26:00

know, I think a lot of first generation,

26:02

oldest immigrants that were born in the old

26:05

country and their siblings were born here, actually

26:07

that's really cool, anybody who's watching, email

26:09

me at Gary at VaynerX, if

26:11

you're this exact person, you're an immigrant yourself,

26:14

you immigrated to America or any

26:17

first world country, London, anywhere else,

26:20

and you're the only sibling that

26:22

was born in the old country but you have

26:24

siblings that were born in the new world. I

26:28

think there's something there. There's something

26:30

there. I felt half parent

26:32

my whole life. AJ,

26:35

who you know well, minimally

26:39

I feel 50% dad, 50%. Of

26:42

course he's 11 years younger than me. So

26:44

you're 18 and he's seven and forget about the

26:46

11 years, like I just

26:49

told you earlier, I felt that way towards my sister

26:51

who's only three and a half years younger. There was

26:53

just something like you're the, and again, I think back,

26:56

this is where I'll say something very important

26:58

right now, I believe, I think

27:00

we judge our parents too much. Yeah, of course. I

27:03

don't sit here and say, mom, I think

27:06

people really dwell too much. I understand,

27:08

my mom lost her mom at

27:10

five and then her dad went

27:13

to jail for 10 years in the Soviet Union

27:15

because every entrepreneur did. But it's

27:17

hard when you're a teen. And so her and her brother

27:19

were the world. So she made, I mean, bratn

27:21

sistra, shena galava was like

27:23

propaganda into my head of

27:26

my relationship with my sister. But it's hard

27:28

when you're eight to think that way, your

27:31

parents should be trying to protect you and

27:33

educate you and elevate you. But

27:35

there is no should. I get it. You

27:38

wanna have a real moment in this podcast? Everybody,

27:40

I'm looking at all the cameras right now.

27:42

There is no should. That's

27:44

the biggest thing, right? Because then we could say

27:47

your parents should do this and then I'll tell

27:49

you the biggest pandemic in the world right now,

27:51

which is 22 to 30 year olds who are

27:53

really struggling with standing on their own two feet

27:55

because their parents went too far to what you just said.

27:58

They took care of them too much. So

28:00

this purple, by the way, look at these two books. This

28:03

is purple for a specific reason. I'm not a Lakers fan.

28:06

And meet me in the middle. What I can tell you

28:08

has become very clear to me is

28:11

I believe that the

28:13

world desperately needs to figure out how to

28:15

fall in love with purple, not red or

28:17

blue because

28:20

they both have major valid points and

28:23

they both have major flaws

28:26

and the middle, especially parenting.

28:28

One of the reasons I started Be Friends is

28:30

I knew

28:32

what was happening with Gary Vee. You know

28:34

this. We run enough similar circles. I've

28:37

been very blessed that because of where I

28:39

was, I was then able to be what

28:41

my mom and my circumstance in a

28:43

lot of ways did for me. I've been

28:45

able to do for a lot of people. Right? It

28:49

feels nice. You get it too. It

28:52

feels nice for people to say, hey, you've really helped

28:54

me. For

28:56

me, children, you

28:58

get in that early. It's one thing if I meet you in

29:00

2009 in St. Louis and could

29:02

be a positive deposit. You've been

29:04

built though. There's a lot of there. You had to

29:06

do a lot of your work. I

29:10

can't do that as an

29:12

outside motivation or inspiration or

29:14

perspective. But when you get in early, so

29:17

for example, in Be Friends, there's

29:19

a character called Accountable Ant. I'm

29:22

obsessed with this character. I

29:25

believe that if I can make

29:27

that character cool like Pikachu or

29:29

Spider-Man, right? That if

29:31

you're a kid that falls in love with the cartoons I'm

29:34

going to put out or the kids' books or the video

29:36

games and you're like, I've put

29:38

Accountable Ant in my gut, right? I

29:40

am accountable for everything in my life.

29:42

Think about what happens. If you love

29:44

Spider-Man or you love Wolverine or you

29:46

love Pikachu, you're subconsciously getting

29:48

in virtues of that. Or

29:51

you envy it because you don't have it. If

29:53

all of a sudden Accountable Ant is your dying or

29:55

wearing hoodies with it, it kind

29:57

of gets hard if you're like, I put Accountable Ant in my gut.

30:00

and you're not being able to. And you're not being

30:02

able to. Or at least strive to it. Or at

30:04

least even know the existence. There's many people watching, listening,

30:06

that don't even realize that they live

30:09

in a full dwelling, complaining, blaming framework.

30:12

I've had many friends, relatives, and

30:14

relationships, acquaintances, and

30:17

business partners, because my parents

30:20

too far went with

30:22

no complaining, which meant keeping things in, right?

30:25

But as you can imagine, if you're visceral

30:27

to complaining, you smell it from a mile

30:30

away. And then if you're really

30:32

visceral to it, and you smell it from a

30:34

mile away, well you're aware that someone's constantly dwelling

30:37

and blaming. And so

30:39

to me, what was most fascinating in

30:41

my 30s and 40s as I've gone

30:43

through this journey is they don't see it. Which

30:46

led me to the great breakthrough of candor. Look,

30:49

I didn't know when we met that

30:51

that was my kryptonite. I thought it was my strength. How

30:54

about that? Because you're being honest online, and you're being honest

30:56

on stage, you mean? No, because I

30:58

didn't even realize the dichotomy of

31:00

that. I just thought I was being

31:02

nice. I was like, look what

31:05

I'm doing for Sally. Two more years of payroll when

31:07

she sucks. Look what I'm doing for Ricky. This

31:10

guy blows, he'll never be okay out there. There

31:12

was probably a mix of little ego, like jump

31:15

on my shoulders, I'm a Superman, which is why

31:17

I'm using the kryptonite example. But

31:19

there was also, I thought it was being good. Life's

31:23

hard lessons. I had to wake up

31:25

in my mid 40s and go, why

31:27

has anyone that's ever worked for me not like me? Because

31:30

you'd read a tweet and be like Gary, I'd

31:32

be like, fuck, how's that possible? It's so nice

31:34

to join. I had to really do that work.

31:36

Why do you think people maybe don't like you?

31:39

Well, people in the outside world who don't

31:41

know me don't like me. The reason

31:43

they wouldn't like it is because either

31:45

my communication style isn't their jam, which I

31:47

understand. When you're aggressive

31:50

and confident and competitive and

31:52

Jersey, my shtick

31:55

in their mind, it doesn't work for me. I understand

31:57

that. Some people more chill. The reason people don't like

31:59

my. I love to live in New York City, some

32:01

people come in and they're like, get me the fuck

32:03

out of here on that, right? It's too much,

32:05

that I respect. Number two. The

32:07

people that know you or work for you or. Yeah,

32:10

let me finish this. I think things will help people

32:12

because what I'm really trying to do in this is

32:14

not say it about me. I'm hoping that people can

32:16

start having a better relationship with people not liking them

32:18

that don't know them. That's

32:20

good. So number two, it's their

32:22

own. They wanna

32:24

be a successful entrepreneur and I'm

32:26

triggering affirmation of like, they're

32:28

not there yet and they're like, you're the guy, right?

32:31

Three, they've overly put me on a pedestal and

32:33

then I do something that they don't agree with

32:35

and it fucks them up, which

32:38

is very flattering but very understanding.

32:42

But it's all wrapped up in who they

32:44

are with themselves. On

32:46

the version of people that do know me, the

32:49

only thing, the black and

32:51

white thing, was the inability, it's

32:54

only the people closest that didn't get the candor

32:56

that I actually ironically liked the most. Now

32:58

what's been nice, you know what got me away with it

33:00

for a long time was

33:03

people's own accountability. Why

33:05

I was getting away with it in my own

33:07

mind to my own self was people would hit

33:10

me up three, four years later with emails like,

33:12

I'm sorry. Because they had gone

33:14

through, look, if you're a C player, you're good with

33:16

me. Because

33:19

I think you need all kinds. It

33:21

was D and F. So you

33:24

could imagine, and that was a subjective opinion whether I'm

33:26

right or wrong. As you can imagine, it's not like

33:28

I'm bad at it. I've been doing it my whole

33:30

life. So a lot of those people really were D

33:32

and F'ing it. And they through

33:34

their own work on themselves, actually

33:36

were able to go back and actually see a lot

33:38

of, they were able to see so many of

33:41

the nice things I was doing, even

33:43

though I was sloppy on the candor and

33:45

on the firing. Kind of like when you get older and you

33:47

look back at your parents. You blame your parents as a kid.

33:50

Oh, they didn't give me this, they didn't do this, but

33:52

then. Then you understand it. I know they were just doing

33:54

the best they could. Are they really trying hard here? They

33:56

were giving me so much here, they sacrificed you. Especially if

33:58

you become a parent yourself. Of course. Then they're

34:00

like, oh. I get it. Yeah,

34:03

yeah, yeah. I get it. It's almost like the way

34:05

I think about athletes. Like, boo, you suck. I'm like,

34:07

you go out there. You go try that. Yeah.

34:09

I mean, speaking about this topic, I mean, just

34:12

start with, you know, still kind of with the

34:14

first question, is

34:17

this sustainable? What

34:19

you just said right here, I think is one

34:21

of the biggest things that holds people back, whether

34:23

that's creating content online, starting a business, or

34:25

putting themselves out there in any endeavor,

34:29

is people care so much what other people think about

34:31

it. How do people

34:33

overcome the opinions and judgments

34:35

of others with their craft,

34:37

business, or art? Therapy,

34:42

positive consumption, new friends,

34:46

exercise, psychedelics,

34:52

true work that

34:55

is starting with, do you understand that that's

34:58

what is actually happening? I

35:01

believe that that is a blind spot

35:03

to everyone. They don't realize why they

35:05

wear designer clothes. They've,

35:07

you know, for so many people, it's attracting the

35:09

opposite sex because they're looking for that closing of

35:11

the gap of love. Right? So

35:14

of course, alpha guys, like, I got to get

35:16

a, you know, think about all the

35:19

trends we see, right? Like these thin

35:21

girls won't like me if I'm not

35:23

rich, right? But it's all like

35:25

deeper than that. That's the surface level like

35:28

pizzazz. It's like they're looking for love. And

35:31

love is important as fuck.

35:34

And so because they're looking for that,

35:37

they believe they need the proxies to get it

35:40

without realizing that's often going to attract

35:42

not the clean version of love you're

35:45

actually looking for. It's

35:47

a whole stuff. It's only, you know, it's

35:49

funny, I said something to Nick, one of

35:51

my executives at Vayner Media, he came from

35:54

Satya and Saachi, a very classic, you

35:56

know, madman era, right? And

35:59

about six months. They could see. Had a novice and then

36:01

and then he was like doing a bunch of stuff

36:03

and I read i plan to recognize what was happening

36:05

and I sat him down. I said. Nick.

36:09

I want you for the next year. This company if you

36:11

want to grow. Do. The opposite.

36:14

Of. Everything you intuitively think you want to

36:16

do. What was he doing? He went to

36:18

like, fought, for example I've been or what

36:21

I try to teach people to talk about.

36:24

The. Irony about what I'm saying so

36:26

if said it becomes your hand isn't

36:28

super easy to find. was under the

36:30

Us and ah we just want something

36:33

called elephant meetings. Let's get the elephant

36:35

our real as could be saving or

36:37

company bro how I want to see

36:39

saving or retention. Is gonna explode

36:41

cause of islam so would see and

36:43

every advertising person I'm laughing when I

36:45

was. I know every single ad agency

36:47

marketing you to see some some each

36:49

person's about the smell. Whether.

36:52

They consciously or subconsciously do. With everything

36:54

is based on save the customers

36:56

which means you're just eating. Lets

36:58

you just kissing them to death even. On

37:00

with the wrong. Slick.

37:03

I'll give an example: social Media Louis

37:05

A While you post on to my

37:07

space. That's when we need to be

37:09

a little yes Sir, Gerry and Will.

37:11

And you know that's not what you should

37:13

do to them. And so. It's it's. like

37:16

classic stuff or like putting a television. Commercial on

37:18

a pedestal versus a social media posts which is

37:20

my holes thesis so those is a lot of

37:22

stuff is coming. Little lot of baggage Spf. Anyway,

37:26

I know he's going to smile right now because I know.

37:28

It's. Been a big factor in his life. is kind of what

37:30

I want to see. To. Everyone right now.

37:33

It's. Almost like if you're not happy. As

37:37

you listening with. If. You're anxious if you

37:39

feel a lot of pressure. The

37:41

answer is, ironically you have to start doing the

37:43

opposite of everything you'd actually want to do. So

37:47

right? So you naturally wanna be at

37:49

night dealing with this. And.

37:52

You're all stressed. See what you want to naturally

37:54

do is go grab another bottle of Moscow. What

37:56

you're supposed to do is not do that and

37:58

wake up tomorrow morning. Go to the. Exactly. Are

38:00

you know, like I do think the

38:02

other thing is. Let's talk about people

38:04

like to say the toxic people around you.

38:07

Are going to give you defer one. What about the

38:09

and neighbors. right? What

38:12

about the people? Like your mom or

38:14

dad or brother and sister were best

38:16

friends who. Are letting you get away

38:18

with your bad behavior as they have

38:20

My flaw. They. Don't have candor

38:22

is. So what people are

38:25

see of is like that. I agree. Be

38:27

tough love or top communication Challenging communication. It's

38:29

really crazy right? Like like it's like in

38:31

in in my real life. in the gary

38:33

be part of it. All. The admiration

38:35

comes from like you're the one that told

38:37

me like some cup. Right?

38:41

But in real live like a

38:43

real life. I'm very fortunate. I'm

38:45

a pretty stable epic family situation

38:47

where it's like we don't have

38:49

any like off the reservation. Family

38:51

members were like bullet friends. And something

38:54

that looks I, I was. I was. Taught and

38:56

it's ingrained in me to be the superhero

38:58

thing I want to fix. but that's what

39:00

gets. parents had a bad place of paying

39:03

for their kids. And all

39:05

that. So these are complicated things. but I

39:07

would say the people. Pay.

39:09

Attention to your circle cause it's everything.

39:11

You. Know it's a cliche, so it's not like I'm inventing

39:14

a saying. The five people you're around are you all that?

39:16

Real. It's really. Really watch that

39:19

the like that's real. Life stuff. How

39:21

worried are you for? Jersey?

39:23

Not. At all in our know. Oxley

39:26

One. Because.

39:29

There's unlimited entitled Lazy

39:31

Boomers. Now

39:33

do I think the stereotypes have merit in

39:35

them? Of course, that's how they happen. So.

39:38

Like do I think that the

39:40

circumstances of parents over coddling as

39:42

a generational truth basically says these

39:44

as a generally since me and

39:46

then cove id where the government

39:48

t new more money to stay

39:50

home on. Do. i think it's

39:53

creators entitlements and some vulnerabilities i do and

39:55

i get it like a new been over

39:57

coddled riskier to lose we were laughing little

39:59

bit before about our famous thumb wrestling match

40:01

where you destroyed me on Summit at Sea,

40:04

I knew that as fun. Literally

40:06

every time I see you, my chemicals go in a

40:08

good way of like, that dude, I gotta get him.

40:10

You know, that's a good thing, not like I'm a

40:12

loser, he's better than me. You know? And

40:15

I just, I'm not worried about

40:17

it because I know too many, I think

40:19

about my company, we have a lot, right?

40:22

We have both full extremes. There are

40:24

people walking around currently in my company

40:26

who are out of their mind expectation

40:30

wise. Like literally like,

40:33

if they could say it, they want me

40:35

to like come to their house, pick them

40:37

up, walk them to, like, you know what

40:39

I mean? Like, yeah, there's just like a

40:41

lot of expectations. We demonize companies. You know,

40:43

the problem for companies is they're not governments

40:45

or schools or your parents. Governments,

40:47

schools or your parents don't

40:50

have merit with you. Meaning

40:53

a company, if it runs out

40:55

of money, it closes. It can't pay you.

40:57

It's over. And

40:59

you know, your parents, like they'll constantly

41:01

run up their own credit card for you if they're

41:04

those kind of parents. The

41:06

government is being full of sh** and print

41:08

money in perpetuity. Just for

41:10

more money. And by the way, if I

41:12

can print money, I'm getting,

41:16

like, and schools, that's fake-o-land.

41:20

You're talking about somebody who, this is real

41:22

now, in that famous four years of high school, never

41:24

opened a book once, never did one piece

41:26

of homework, never. Never spent one

41:29

minute studying for a test. How'd you

41:31

pass? I figured out somewhere

41:33

around freshman year that school was

41:35

going for blue ribbon status and

41:37

they needed everyone to pass. Wow.

41:40

They were just enabling people to get through. Wow.

41:44

I was like, good, this works for me. And I'm an entrepreneur. One

41:47

day I'm gonna be, I also knew that I

41:49

was gonna be like such a workaholic that I

41:51

was like, let me take these last couple years

41:53

of enjoyment and get some bank ups and rest.

41:56

You know? And so this goes back to being weird.

41:58

Like, I have a lot of weird dynamics now. how

42:00

I realized the world, I'm like, oh, because before

42:02

I lived in my own life, in

42:04

my own family, in my own neighborhood with no internet,

42:06

I didn't know that my life was weird. Right. You

42:09

know, and so anyway, and then

42:11

I've got Gen Zers who are 20

42:13

year olds, you and me, fire coming out of

42:16

their work. Yeah.

42:19

Like, you know, and it's not because they eat spicy food,

42:21

because they're just like, I'm gonna, like look

42:23

me dead in the face and saying, I'm gonna run this

42:25

whole company one day, and I'm like, let's fucking go, Sal,

42:27

let's fucking go. So what would you say to someone in

42:29

their 20s who maybe wants

42:31

to accomplish a lot, and

42:35

maybe didn't

42:37

have it that hard growing up, and they feel

42:39

like it's gonna come easily to them? Force the

42:41

heart. Create the

42:43

struggle. Why is that necessary? I sent

42:46

it to a friend, you know, it's crazy.

42:48

My friends I grew up with, like in our

42:50

era, their kids now were 18. Like,

42:53

right, if you had a kid, it's crazy. So

42:55

I'm now having the craziest talks, like

42:58

ever. I knew this kid

43:00

when he was two, and I'm talking to him now, like my audience.

43:02

And I tell a lot of these kids, and a lot

43:04

of them, especially the ones I was close with, and we

43:06

did a lot of business, some of these parents really made

43:08

money. You know, like those early

43:11

Facebook and Twitter, and like, you know, like, then

43:13

you're like, so these kids

43:15

are bougie. Right. They

43:18

weren't back closing you. I told, hell yeah.

43:20

Yeah. Though this gap with his

43:22

friends. That's pretty money. Richard, good. Um,

43:25

I tell them, like, yo bro, I had a

43:27

very, very real conversation two weeks ago. I said,

43:30

bro, I said,

43:32

you got two choices here. You

43:34

take mommy and daddy's money, and create some sort

43:36

of fake picture, and all the real ones know,

43:39

so you're not tricking winners, and you're

43:41

tricking 98% of the losing players, and

43:44

you can live that life, and many do. Mm-hmm.

43:47

That's easy, eh? Or, if you're telling

43:49

me, because the kid had good words coming out of his mouth,

43:51

I'm like, if you mean it, well

43:53

then you need to go work at

43:55

a company, and work your ass off.

43:57

And you need to get three

43:59

roommates. instead of your own place, and

44:01

you need to, if you do

44:04

not take their money, then you can do

44:06

it. So if you

44:08

weren't fully taken care of your whole life,

44:11

you were allowed to say, mom, dad,

44:13

no, you're allowed. The

44:16

problem is too many people like to talk out of both

44:18

sides of their mouth. They wanna sit on mom

44:20

and dad, but they want the

44:22

unlimited credit card. They like that

44:24

they bought them an apartment. When

44:29

you get a new car or a new home,

44:32

your first reaction might be to say things like,

44:34

oh yeah, or I can't believe it, or boo

44:36

ya. But what you really wanna say is the

44:38

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45:58

are you teaching your kids about? life

46:00

and I'm doing it right now. My

46:03

kids can watch this. They're going to

46:05

watch it. Right? Think about this. No kid listens

46:07

to their parents. So like

46:09

me and my friends who like think about thoughtful, we

46:12

all laugh. They're like, can you talk

46:14

to my kids? I'm like, yeah, but can

46:16

you talk to my kids? You Gary Vee?

46:19

They really don't look like I'm very fortunate

46:21

but but no, no, in the way that I'm

46:23

saying it, they're always saying it. They're like,

46:25

it's dad. Yeah, of course. They're not about, they

46:28

didn't find me on the For You page.

46:30

They're like, who's this cool guy? They're like,

46:32

no way bro. I'm not listening to you and

46:34

I'm smart enough. I don't know if smart

46:36

story. I'm aware enough to know

46:38

like I'm not gonna be, listen, I'm

46:40

dad and every dad and mom has have

46:43

a obnoxious impact on their kid

46:46

but I'm gonna be dad to them which means an outside

46:49

voice like I'm able to be a contributor to

46:51

so many. I can't be that for my kids

46:53

because I'm the main thing. Other

46:56

people have to be contributors. But it's

46:58

cool because I understand it. I'm

47:00

pretty fortunate. I know a lot of people

47:03

that I think are really positive contributors to

47:05

the conversation and I can't wait. Just

47:07

like my friends now are like, like the

47:09

last four years have been phenomenal especially five

47:11

years because of TikTok because even started a

47:13

little bit earlier. There

47:16

isn't a week that doesn't go by that

47:18

a business acquaintance all the way, you

47:20

know, that's over here to you to

47:22

the inner circle, right? That

47:25

my social graph that I won't get a text and

47:27

be like and like it's so funny

47:29

because it's happening so common. It always the same

47:32

thing. You'll never believe this and

47:34

at first I didn't know what it was and then and

47:37

then a couple years in I

47:39

was like what but I knew and

47:41

I would smile but now I reply immediately. I'm like

47:44

your kids follow me on TikTok and they think

47:46

I'm cool. They're like how'd you know? I'm like

47:48

you know like that's how day framing attention works

47:51

but you know it's really

47:53

really cool. I can't wait for

47:55

my son who's 11 in

47:58

like four years six years text me like Dad,

48:00

do you know who Lewis House is? Or

48:04

dad, how do you know Lewis House? Or dad,

48:06

you've known him since, look at him taking a

48:08

picture of us at World Cost Plus Market or

48:10

whatever, right? That's

48:12

gonna be interesting, but I'm aware that I'm

48:14

dad, so I'm trying to give them all the shit

48:16

I believe in. But I know

48:18

it's a different version than what GaryVee is

48:20

because they're gonna have supplement, compliment voices to

48:23

their world, and it'll be

48:25

interesting to see what they gravitate towards. They

48:27

may be like many kids, they may gravitate

48:29

away from my message. They

48:32

may reject it for a while. Purple, I wanna

48:35

be extreme blue or extreme red, ain't they? Wow.

48:37

And I think they'll see. Notice how I'm saying that, I'm

48:39

not scared of that. When you love,

48:42

when you try, when you have intent,

48:44

when you're ready for it, it's

48:48

like a game, it's like business.

48:50

I'm ready for the trials and

48:52

tribulation of fatherhood. I'm ready

48:54

for the trials and tribulation of a

48:57

human being. I anticipate

48:59

heartbreak. I anticipate my parents

49:01

passing away because it will happen. It would

49:03

be very good for my parents to pass

49:05

away before I pass away, mainly because I

49:07

wouldn't want that for them, right?

49:10

So I mean, but those things

49:12

don't cripple me. Those

49:14

things, I actually are

49:16

the enhancer of me enjoying a day like

49:18

this. It is a good day. Everybody

49:21

I love is good. You know what

49:23

I mean? What does cripple you? Not

49:26

much brother. I think the thing that cripples me is

49:29

I haven't had the extreme heartbreak

49:31

of losing a family

49:33

member that's within my inner six or

49:35

seven. Yeah. You

49:38

know? That scares me. Yeah, it's tough. I

49:40

couldn't comprehend losing a sibling,

49:44

a parent, a niece, a nephew, a

49:46

child. That just, I'm not ready

49:49

for that game. I really,

49:51

my heart cries deeply for

49:53

every human that has

49:55

ever had to taste the sorrow

49:57

of losing a child. Yeah. And

50:00

then for the people that are lucky, like

50:03

me, who are deeply

50:06

grateful and loved with their parents, that's also

50:08

a crusher, right? Again, now I'm 48, I

50:10

have so many 60, 70 year old friends.

50:13

Like, it's really fascinating, you can see it. I mean,

50:15

I have friends who I can see it on

50:17

their face. They genuinely, not that

50:19

they want their mom or dad to die, but

50:22

that relationship is so not good, that

50:24

there's a part of them that's a cleansing. And

50:26

like they kind of- Like a freeing of- They

50:29

kind of like, you know, they definitely

50:31

don't think about it the way I do, which is like, please God,

50:33

don't let it happen for another 40 years. You

50:36

know what I mean? Yeah, of course. So, you know,

50:38

that's important to me, but I keep life very

50:40

basic, I keep it very binary. It's- I

50:43

mean, you say that, but from the outside, people

50:45

see that you have, you know, 2,000 employees, you've

50:48

got, I don't know, a hundred

50:51

bazillion social media followers, you've got a thousand pieces

50:53

of content going out every day. And V-Friends and

50:55

V-Friends and the pickle ball team. You've

50:57

got all of these different, you

51:00

invest in, I don't know, a million different companies,

51:02

you've got thousands of relationships that are constantly texting

51:04

you. That's because people don't understand the root cause

51:07

of why that's happening. The root

51:09

cause is because it's simple. Really?

51:11

Sure. But how do you- I'll

51:13

explain. How do you navigate

51:16

all of these businesses, relationships, content? How

51:18

much do you have? How

51:20

much do you bench? I

51:22

mean, I can, well, I recently did 225 11 times. Okay,

51:25

I cannot do that. How did you

51:27

do that? Two things. You were physically gifted

51:30

in your birth and

51:32

then you put in work. And I trained. And I

51:34

have a funny feeling, am I wrong? You've benched

51:37

more at certain parts of your life, right? Yeah,

51:39

yeah. How much did you do it the most? 15

51:41

times maybe 225. Great. So

51:43

why 15 that time and 11 this time? I'm

51:46

building it back up now. Right. This is where I'm

51:48

going. You would put in more work. How

51:51

am I able to do this? I

51:53

was gifted in being a purebred entrepreneur,

51:55

which means I want to do a

51:57

lot of different things. Purebred. by

52:00

people who never opened up a book, even

52:02

the worst of the worst, I'm telling you, because

52:05

I was selling baseball. Come home, get down,

52:07

start pricing my baseball cards for the card

52:09

show. And then the next year,

52:11

it was my dad's world. Come home and read the

52:13

wine. Wasn't that I wasn't working? What

52:15

did I do on Wednesday, October 9th, 1991, when

52:18

I got home? I went into my room, put

52:20

on Sports Center, and got the latest

52:23

issue of the Wine Spectator and read it. Or

52:26

Beckett or whatever it was. Beckett was

52:28

90, and then it started, and

52:30

then it started being Wine Spectator. It wasn't complicated.

52:32

I was going deep. And so, how

52:36

do I do it? It's because-

52:38

I mean, how do you navigate and manage all of it?

52:40

By not being scared to drop it. That's the key. Because

52:43

I have 43 balls up, I'm gonna have

52:45

17 ball. I

52:47

think we live in a world back to insecurity and

52:49

confidence where people have one ball, and they're

52:52

petrified for it to fall. I

52:56

have 43 and 17 ball. And

52:59

I don't care if somebody- Let's

53:02

pick a business. VaynerSpeakers, our speaking

53:04

bureau. There's a press

53:06

release that says, VaynerX is shutting

53:08

down VaynerSpeakers. I, like a logical

53:10

human, like anybody else, would be like, oh, they couldn't pull

53:12

it off. It didn't work. Gary

53:15

couldn't do it. It didn't go good. That's

53:18

a loss. That's right.

53:22

I just don't know how to be concerned

53:25

with Lewis and Dustin and

53:27

everybody right now and reading

53:29

that and saying, Gary's not, what are you

53:31

gonna say? Gary's not as good as he thinks.

53:33

I don't think. Have you never been concerned about

53:35

what people think about you with a loss or

53:37

a challenging time? Not a loss or a

53:40

challenging time. Really? The reason I've spent so

53:42

much time trying to figure out candor is I

53:44

really care. Let's use Max Bass. Great

53:47

former employee, I love him. We just wanna give him a shout out.

53:49

Plus I'm looking at this purple and yellow. He's a big Lakers fan.

53:51

And he's an LA, so it's probably the way he came to mind.

53:54

I care if Max Bass thinks I'm a good dude. Spent

53:56

too much time with him. The quality

53:58

of me is a human matter. to me, not

54:01

as me as a businessman. I'm aware

54:03

that I love it. I love being an entrepreneur.

54:05

I'm famously an entrepreneur. I was one of

54:07

the entrepreneurs that happened to me in place

54:09

when it became the thing. But

54:13

it is not how I fucking think about myself. It's

54:15

what I do. It's my favorite

54:17

game. It is my passion. It's

54:20

not who I am. So

54:24

it's made it very easy. Plus I'm

54:26

very fucking, you know, I'm very

54:28

happy go lucky, but I'm competitive, meaning, you

54:31

know, like meaning like, let's

54:34

say a coconut hit your head and you became a totally different

54:36

kind of guy and that let's keep

54:38

playing that scenario. Vayner speaker shuts down and

54:40

you text me, ha ha ha bro, you

54:42

thought you could do everything. I'd be like,

54:44

bro, you've lost too. Like

54:46

that's the other gear I have. First on empathetic, which is

54:48

like, you must not be in a good place if you

54:50

want to take me when I'm down. And then second, I'm

54:52

like, you. That's

54:55

the other thing that I don't understand what these people are doing. As

54:57

if any human on

55:00

earth today hasn't fucked

55:02

up multiple parts of their life. Maybe they're

55:04

not a good dad. Maybe they're not a

55:06

good mom. Maybe they're not a good employee.

55:08

Maybe they're a bad sister. Maybe they're not

55:10

good to their mother. Maybe they're bad at

55:12

driving. Maybe they don't know how to cook.

55:14

Maybe they're 400 pounds overweight because

55:17

they don't have a good relationship with like, as

55:19

if anyone on earth is perfect.

55:23

I mean, this is insane to me. When you

55:25

see people getting attached to you. Do you see

55:28

things Michael Jordan is not good at? You

55:30

know what I think Tom Brady is not good at? You

55:33

can be the greatest at something and suck

55:35

at something else. I

55:37

can write six New York Times bestselling

55:39

books, but I'm aware based on

55:42

the last three days that I'm not an

55:44

attempt in the top 4 million people that

55:46

should be reading an audio book. Now, everybody

55:48

will love it. And this is

55:50

why I do it because I get the feedback because they want

55:52

it to be me. And I go off script and I

55:54

add stuff. But the skill

55:56

of reading, I'm blow. That's why I was

55:58

a bad student in hindsight. I didn't know the

56:00

fuck was going on. I was like. Yes.

56:04

And that's why I was good at history. The

56:07

only reason, the only class I did well at

56:09

was history is because I listened during class.

56:12

My audio was tough. Oh,

56:15

Chiang Kai-shek? Yeah. Yeah. You know what I mean?

56:17

Oh, that's what Germany did? Oh,

56:19

that's who the president was? Oh, Walter Mondale

56:21

lost every state but won to Reagan? Like

56:24

that's why I know that because I listened.

56:27

Wow. When people criticize you

56:29

for being too busy

56:33

or doing too many entrepreneurial things and

56:36

they have no clue about your personal life

56:39

but they'll criticize you, oh, he's probably not

56:41

showing up for his kids or he's not

56:43

there for his relationships or whatever it might

56:45

be. How do

56:47

you navigate that conversation when people say,

56:49

oh, he's just a business guy but

56:51

he's really not good at family, intimate

56:54

relationships, personal life? I

56:57

mean, if my mom said that, then I'd

56:59

be like, let's have this conversation. If Johnny

57:01

Pants 49 in the comments section says

57:04

it, I'm like, Johnny Pants, I don't know you. Usually

57:08

it's a direct reflection of their own

57:10

anxiety. Lewis, think about

57:12

this. Can you imagine taking time to going

57:14

to somebody else's account? Criticizing them. To try

57:16

to make them feel bad? No, no. I

57:18

don't like, you know, I'm trying

57:20

to change some words in society. Let's

57:23

say criticizing out. It sounds like classic. No,

57:25

no, no. I

57:27

wanna go back to first grade talk. To try to pull

57:29

them down. You're trying to make someone

57:31

feel bad. Yeah, shame them. You're trying

57:33

to make someone feel bad. I

57:37

don't know, man, like I just don't have that gear. Yeah. And

57:40

I don't judge those people either.

57:42

My lack of judgment against haters,

57:44

trolls, negative people is

57:46

a very big power. How do you not take

57:49

that personally when so many people did that? They

57:51

don't know me. It's, honestly,

57:54

brother, it's logical. It's

57:56

actually very logical. I

58:00

would have to think you care more about what

58:02

I think about you than someone you've never met

58:04

because we've been rapid. See as already one

58:06

times it would just be logical. Yeah I

58:08

the learn this by the hard way for

58:10

many years. Really? Until last five years

58:13

when it started to be like okay when

58:15

people are saying nasty things about me or

58:17

liners and we we are nasty comment or

58:19

whatever it is. I. Can

58:21

literally take it as a neutral information

58:23

and not take it personally anymore, but

58:25

it took me a decade coming in

58:27

warm. Other: I'm not a robot, right?

58:29

It's not like, you know, yeah, you

58:31

know, especially like I'll give you big

58:33

ones. The proudest thing I have in

58:35

my life professionally is that I sacrificed.

58:38

The. First wells four years of

58:40

my career. To. Build a business

58:42

from and it's like it is The thing I'm

58:44

proudest. It. Is also

58:46

been the thing historically the people weaponize against

58:48

me really don't listen to him to they

58:50

don't normally Stories newest on the ticked off

58:53

he inherited a winery in rye rounded person

58:55

would almost got some New Jersey. An

58:57

inherent. I'm one of the

58:59

few people on Earth letter was the

59:02

direct correlation for massive growth for their

59:04

families and extracted no financial value. On

59:07

the opposite of what you think your weaponizing

59:09

against me, for your weaponizing that against me,

59:11

it's all just launched. It's you saying that?

59:13

Because what I'm saying in this video was

59:15

hard. I'm saying. You

59:18

Stop blaming. The. Government, the

59:21

school system, hair and your period.

59:23

And what about you? Your bronek?

59:25

Kid now. Twenty six when you

59:28

cried about you don't like it put in

59:30

the work. You've. Got unlimited people

59:32

look up to you talking about own five years

59:34

putting in the wars. I'm sitting here saying mean

59:36

I'm still working on com Not even. Like

59:39

oh I see your point Seven is what I

59:41

scored me and I'm and think about I'm on

59:43

the greeting my own home which not really a

59:45

three point feel. Like

59:48

league wide Are you not t bubble

59:50

being accountable or like something? We all.

59:52

Like you will eventually have to.

59:54

Man and woman are no matter

59:56

how toxic. Which. their whoop

59:59

civil suit me Well, but my dad,

1:00:01

I'm like, bro, there are people who had

1:00:03

their uncles abduct

1:00:06

them. There are people who watched

1:00:08

their parents drive out of the

1:00:10

driveway and get hit by a truck and get killed.

1:00:12

There are so much extreme. Like

1:00:16

as if your circumstance is the single

1:00:19

worst one, we both

1:00:21

are very active in a charity that

1:00:23

is trying to help 800 million

1:00:27

people. I'm

1:00:29

sorry about that. I was going for a fact. Brother,

1:00:32

800 million people on

1:00:34

earth did not have access to what

1:00:36

I just done. You and I spend real

1:00:38

time on that. 800

1:00:41

million people can't get clean water

1:00:43

within a day right now on earth.

1:00:46

Yeah. And you're

1:00:48

telling me your mom hurt your feelings?

1:00:50

I get it, that's real. But

1:00:52

you're not capable of being

1:00:54

accountable and saying, you know what,

1:00:57

I'm gonna be the one that fixes it. How

1:01:00

many, I met a man, and by the way, I'm recalling

1:01:02

that, had drinks the other day. Young man

1:01:04

who said I was the one that broke

1:01:06

the pattern of alcoholism in my family. My

1:01:08

great grandfather, my grandfather, my father, and I said,

1:01:11

no. And everything was there for me to do it.

1:01:13

I was on the streets at 13, I

1:01:16

started to go down it. I was like, no. So

1:01:18

why him? He's not special,

1:01:20

I'm not special. You're not special.

1:01:23

We have talents. The

1:01:26

thing I love about what you're doing with Meet Me in the Middle

1:01:30

is you're teaching, I

1:01:32

mean, adults, anyone, kids, but

1:01:34

adults as well, emotional accountability.

1:01:37

You're teaching emotional intelligence, you're

1:01:39

teaching skills that

1:01:41

can be applied towards day trading

1:01:44

and content and business and just

1:01:46

navigating the business world. High,

1:01:48

low, right? Exactly. If I can

1:01:50

get you right here. Like if you read this as a

1:01:53

kid, then the amount of people

1:01:55

that are gonna, bro, the amount of,

1:01:57

you know me pretty well. I know that this

1:01:59

book is gonna. the sleigh, because I'm

1:02:01

straight up feeding

1:02:03

you, like here's the medicine. Like

1:02:05

I was bored reading my book. Right

1:02:08

Dustin? Like my first half, because

1:02:10

it's so in details. Like it's, it's, and

1:02:12

jab, jab, jab, right hook did

1:02:15

really well. And I was like, okay, because

1:02:17

they get so much top level for me

1:02:19

every day on social. Let me in book

1:02:21

form give them something that they get, like,

1:02:23

right? I know this will

1:02:25

crush. Here's the problem to where you're about to

1:02:27

go. If they don't have their together, they're

1:02:30

gonna start, it's double screwed. It's gonna start working

1:02:32

a little bit. And then they're gonna get Johnny pants

1:02:35

saying, you and then they're gonna go, so

1:02:37

it doesn't even matter. Exactly. That's why I need ying

1:02:39

and yang. Yeah, that's why I had all the

1:02:41

drive for most of my life. I

1:02:43

was like, I need to be successful. I'm gonna get

1:02:46

better in sports. I was willing to put in the

1:02:48

work and do whatever it takes to win, right? And

1:02:50

that helped me become accomplished, but

1:02:53

it left me feeling insecure alone and

1:02:55

still not enough inside. No matter how

1:02:57

much I had, and

1:02:59

how many accomplishments or success or accolades or

1:03:01

whatever it might be, or people telling me,

1:03:03

followers, it didn't make me feel loved. It

1:03:06

didn't bring me peace. And as I was telling

1:03:08

you before, you were like,

1:03:10

what's different in your life right now? And I said,

1:03:12

I feel peace, I feel abundant, I feel grateful, I

1:03:14

feel blessed, and I feel loved. And

1:03:17

it wasn't because I've accomplished

1:03:20

more, it's because I went

1:03:22

inside and I started really connecting with

1:03:24

my heart, my emotions, childhood stuff, and

1:03:26

just allowing myself the time and space

1:03:28

to heal. And

1:03:31

that's been the hardest work. That has been harder

1:03:33

than building business and doing the podcast for 11

1:03:36

years every week and all these different things, but

1:03:39

actually looking

1:03:42

at the insecurities in front of me from

1:03:46

as far back as I could go, looking

1:03:48

at my younger self in front of me

1:03:50

and developing a new relationship

1:03:53

with self. For others, everything.

1:03:55

And it's given me peace with the

1:03:57

ups and downs. It's

1:04:00

just given me a different perspective of gratitude.

1:04:02

I've always been grateful but this has given

1:04:04

me more gratitude towards everything.

1:04:08

And I want to

1:04:10

share the skill that I think has really

1:04:12

helped me to think that I've

1:04:14

had to learn that I didn't have for most

1:04:17

of my life that has really given me this

1:04:19

perspective in a moment. But I

1:04:21

want to ask you with Meet Me in the Middle. If

1:04:25

you could only give people

1:04:27

three talents

1:04:29

that they should work on, focus

1:04:31

on, develop that is

1:04:33

going to help them in this, is going

1:04:35

to help them with relationships, health, everything. You've

1:04:39

got a lot of different things with Meet

1:04:42

Me in the Middle and a lot of

1:04:44

different characters and archetypes and identities that people

1:04:46

can go into. But three emotional skills that

1:04:49

people can master in their 20s, 30s and

1:04:51

beyond. What would those three things be?

1:04:58

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1:05:52

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landroverusa.com. This

1:06:00

show is sponsored by BetterHelp. I've learned the

1:06:03

hard way that constantly holding onto your emotions

1:06:05

and repeatedly choosing to not talk about your

1:06:07

feelings will only make you feel worse and

1:06:09

worse. And up until about 10 or 11

1:06:11

years ago, I was afraid to talk about

1:06:13

my trauma that I experienced. And I know

1:06:15

we all carry around different stressors, big and

1:06:17

small, and when we keep them bottled up,

1:06:19

it can start to affect us negatively. But

1:06:21

therapy is a safe space to get things

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chest with BetterHelp. Visit betterhelp.com/Lewis today

1:06:48

to get 10% off your first

1:06:50

month. That's BetterHelp, help.com/L-E-W-I-S. I'll

1:06:53

tell them in V-Friends form. So people that don't know,

1:06:55

there's 250 plus, I think it's

1:06:58

283 V-Friends, and they're named as

1:07:01

alliterations of things I believe in.

1:07:03

So this book is Patient Pig

1:07:05

and Eager Eagle. So you can

1:07:08

imagine how they can meet in the

1:07:10

middle, right? To answer your question directly,

1:07:12

I will start first with self-aware hair.

1:07:16

Self-awareness. And

1:07:18

self-awareness becomes the gateway drug

1:07:21

to self-love. Once you can

1:07:23

see it in yourself, I didn't see

1:07:25

the lack of candor. And my

1:07:27

superpower is self-awareness. This is why I was

1:07:29

so good. I was like, I'm this,

1:07:31

but I'm not this. And I'm this, but I'm not this. And

1:07:33

I didn't envy or have

1:07:36

jealousy towards that I wasn't 6'3".

1:07:38

I wish I was. I wanted to play

1:07:40

for the Jets instead of own them one day. But

1:07:43

it didn't happen. And I wish

1:07:45

I could sing, and I want to

1:07:48

be a backstreet boy. But that seems

1:07:50

fun. But I didn't have that. And

1:07:52

there was never like I got really so

1:07:54

self-awareness was really, really strong. And I think

1:07:57

it would help a lot of people. It's

1:07:59

okay. to be what you

1:08:01

are, but do you even know what you

1:08:03

are? How do you know what you are? Do you know

1:08:05

that you're tenacious? Do you know that

1:08:07

you're competitive? Do you, and I think you

1:08:09

need to double down on those things, not smooth them out,

1:08:11

or what a lot of people do, over

1:08:15

obsess of what you're not. You

1:08:19

need to tweak things. Anyway,

1:08:21

so self-awareness. How do you

1:08:23

develop more self-awareness? I'll go into that in

1:08:25

a minute, because I've thought about that a

1:08:27

lot. I actually think it's about communication around

1:08:29

your inner circle to let them be safe

1:08:31

to tell you the truth. Wow.

1:08:34

It's a wild one. Like, tell me what? Tell me

1:08:36

like. If you're listening right now, because

1:08:38

I'm gonna give it to you right now. Because

1:08:40

I just can feel the listener on the other

1:08:43

side. Hey, everyone, real talk. If

1:08:45

you're like, oh, this is hitting me, I've got a big one

1:08:47

for you, because I said this in my last book, and I've

1:08:49

got a lot of reach out on this. Just

1:08:52

pick the two or three people, probably your sister

1:08:54

and your brother, probably your mom or dad, definitely

1:08:57

your best friend, definitely your best friend.

1:08:59

And maybe like an epic person you

1:09:02

work with, like your favorite boss ever

1:09:04

or Chris. And literally

1:09:06

invite them to a dinner, literally.

1:09:08

I'm not joking, and say, this

1:09:10

is gonna be a weird, fun dinner. I'll surprise

1:09:13

you when we get there, because you don't want them to

1:09:15

overthink. When you get there, you're

1:09:17

gonna say, you'll never believe this. I was listening to

1:09:19

Lewis's podcast, Gary Vee was, I'm

1:09:21

really not joking. I

1:09:24

don't, this is a very important part of

1:09:26

this little narrative thing that I'm telling you. You're

1:09:28

gonna say to them, it's unlikely you'll be able to

1:09:30

deliver on what I'm about to ask right this second.

1:09:34

But if you're wondering why my best friend's here, and

1:09:36

my boss that none of you have ever met, and

1:09:38

my sister and my aunt are here, let me tell

1:09:40

you why. I'll bring them all together in one, wow.

1:09:43

Because what you wanna do is suffocate. It's

1:09:46

kind of like posting your weight on

1:09:48

the internet, and like you wanna suffocate

1:09:50

yourself. Correct. You're

1:09:52

saying, I wanna be more self-aware. I

1:09:55

need all of you to tell me the

1:09:57

full truth. All of you are the people I love.

1:10:00

I deem that I think love me

1:10:02

the most, which means it's gonna

1:10:04

be hard for you to say, but I'm bringing you

1:10:06

all together to say, what I need is this, and

1:10:08

you don't have to do it now, because boss,

1:10:10

you might feel weird saying it in front of my mom the first

1:10:12

time you've ever met her, but I

1:10:14

need it ASAP. Tomorrow's fine

1:10:17

one-on-one. And every family in

1:10:19

there- Things will open up as people start going.

1:10:21

Every circle's gonna be different. Every circle's gonna be

1:10:23

different. This is like almost creating a self intervention.

1:10:25

Correct. Most people aren't willing to do that. Correct.

1:10:28

Again, I think three to 11 people listening

1:10:30

right now, and I know a lot of people are gonna listen between

1:10:33

both of our platforms. I think only three to 11

1:10:35

people are gonna do this. And they could send us a

1:10:37

message after they do. It's gonna be amazing. And

1:10:39

so that would be how you find self awareness,

1:10:41

because someone's gonna, like, if I hadn't done that,

1:10:45

either my mom who struggles with it as well, my

1:10:48

dad who recognizes it, Brandon

1:10:50

Warnicki, my best friend, who runs Wine Library

1:10:52

and Wine Text, also struggles

1:10:54

with it, so he might've not even been able to

1:10:56

say it. My brother might've been able to come through.

1:10:59

My sister now would've been able to see it more than

1:11:01

10 years. But if I had done it, somebody

1:11:05

in that circle might've been like, you're

1:11:07

too full of shit, you're too nice. Wow.

1:11:10

Somebody might've, if I did what I'm saying

1:11:12

here, which is like, say it, it's

1:11:14

okay. I know you don't believe me. And

1:11:17

you're even, and I was very, I was

1:11:19

a challenge for people always, because I was

1:11:21

always providing so much emotional and financial value.

1:11:23

Of course, yeah. I'm a real piece

1:11:26

of work for most people, because

1:11:28

it is very common for me

1:11:30

to be either, and often both,

1:11:32

the emotional and financial values

1:11:34

in the relationship. They don't wanna ruin

1:11:37

the relationship. Of course. Yeah, yeah. Like,

1:11:39

it's, you know, it's

1:11:41

a vulnerability for me. It's

1:11:44

my coping mechanism. I always have the leverage. You can

1:11:46

take care of people, yeah. I just always have the

1:11:48

leverage. I mean, those are two things on

1:11:50

Earth. Emotional, and

1:11:52

finally, that's the game. And

1:11:54

I'm good at both, and

1:11:56

generous with both. Wow,

1:11:59

okay. So that's number one, self-awareness.

1:12:02

Number two, gratitude gorilla.

1:12:06

I think if you can learn, and

1:12:09

this is just killing people on earth, you

1:12:12

would be flabbergasted what would happen. And

1:12:14

I've seen it with people around me

1:12:16

recently, where you just decide

1:12:19

right now on this podcast, that

1:12:22

instead of waking up in the morning, which

1:12:24

so many people do, being all

1:12:26

upset, and having all of

1:12:29

their perspective and energy towards what's

1:12:31

not good, I should be making more

1:12:33

money. I don't like my job. This person

1:12:35

I just woke up next to is, I don't

1:12:37

like them anymore. Like all the tough stuff. Instead

1:12:41

deciding to be like, I'm

1:12:43

glad I woke up and didn't die last night. Simplicity.

1:12:48

Gratitude comes from simplicity. Like

1:12:51

it's like, you know, back to your point,

1:12:53

like everyone's like, Gary, social media's off

1:12:56

everybody. They think they need this stuff. Do you understand

1:12:58

that I grew up watching Lifestyles of the Rich and

1:13:00

Famous? Right. Have

1:13:03

you heard of MTV Cribs? Everybody

1:13:05

saw that. Everyone's showing the over

1:13:08

the top of it. Pimp my

1:13:10

ride. Like if you're not a $400 used

1:13:12

car, that fell. This

1:13:14

is not a new phenomenon. Like

1:13:17

as if, what, you didn't go to school and one

1:13:19

of the kids was the richest kid in school? You

1:13:21

didn't have envy that they had a brand new BMW

1:13:24

and you had to walk to school? Get

1:13:26

the out of here with envy and jealousy. It's

1:13:28

as old as true. Like time. So

1:13:31

gratitude. What do you have? Again, I

1:13:34

said something to somebody who was complaining in my inner circle

1:13:37

about three, four years ago. And

1:13:40

they were just like, but you, to me and

1:13:42

then to other stuff, right? And I finally

1:13:45

said, I said, ex person, let's

1:13:48

fuck this dinner. Cause it's not like fun.

1:13:51

Instead of telling me like why I have it

1:13:53

better, why, and this is somebody

1:13:55

I really know, why this person has better, why your older

1:13:57

brother has it better. This is the real example. I'm like,

1:14:00

in the next 20 minutes while we eat this chicken,

1:14:03

can you please tell me? Hand the door perfectly. You're

1:14:05

gonna like this. I said, can you tell me who

1:14:07

you have it better than? Who? And

1:14:11

it was a really interesting moment and I know that person's

1:14:13

smiling right now and I'll probably get a text. I

1:14:15

think it really had an impact on them because

1:14:18

I suffocated it. They're like,

1:14:20

oh, I was like, no, no, just appease me. We're

1:14:23

like, we're here. Who do you have

1:14:25

it better than? And then he

1:14:27

went into like all our common people which he definitely

1:14:29

had it better than. And then I went into my,

1:14:31

and I'm like, okay. And

1:14:35

what about everybody who is

1:14:37

in Africa right now

1:14:39

in concentration and the people

1:14:41

in China, and like people like, what

1:14:44

about real, what about

1:14:46

somebody who during this dinner got

1:14:48

diagnosed with terminal cancer and

1:14:51

during this dinner looked down at

1:14:53

their phone real quick and got into a car accident that

1:14:55

took their life. And what about

1:14:57

the two 14 year old twin daughters that lost their

1:14:59

mom in that picture I just paid? Since we've

1:15:01

been sitting here, I just don't

1:15:03

understand how people don't understand what's going on. Since you

1:15:06

and I have been sitting recording this

1:15:08

podcast of the 8 billion people

1:15:10

on earth, thousands. Have

1:15:12

died. Have not only died,

1:15:15

correct, but have gotten

1:15:17

devastating news. I

1:15:20

saw this stat maybe five years ago that

1:15:23

has given me a completely different perspective on

1:15:25

gratitude that roughly 150,000 people a day die. We

1:15:30

woke up today. We're not one of them. And

1:15:33

if we can just have that one perspective, 150,000

1:15:35

people a day die. I

1:15:37

live on that, Louis. And honestly, death

1:15:39

is less scary than something, notice where

1:15:42

I went with it. You said die

1:15:44

and I jumped in with devastating news.

1:15:49

I asked this to myself and I asked it to everyone.

1:15:52

Is it better for you to die? Or

1:15:54

is it better for the person you love the

1:15:56

most on earth and can't live without dying? I

1:15:58

think most people are gonna choose themselves. that was an ethereal.

1:16:01

So there's just a lot going on. So

1:16:03

I just think gratitude, number three, and we already

1:16:05

talked about it, but I can't get away from

1:16:07

it. If you can

1:16:10

learn that pointing a thumb will

1:16:12

lead to ultimate happiness, and

1:16:14

pointing a finger will compound your

1:16:17

unhappiness, you will realize that

1:16:19

accountability is the, I

1:16:22

almost have delusional, not

1:16:24

even healthy accountability. That's

1:16:27

how much I like it. I

1:16:29

really do believe what I'm about to say.

1:16:32

Every single thing at VaynerX

1:16:34

and VeeFriends and VaynerSports and every one

1:16:36

of my companies that has a problem is 100% my

1:16:38

fault. I'm at the top. So

1:16:41

if Sally screwed up, well, I hired the person

1:16:43

that hired the person that hired the person that

1:16:46

hired Sally. I did. So

1:16:49

I think that accountability

1:16:52

is the anecdote. It's

1:16:55

the formula. It's the

1:16:57

solution. It's the medicine, and I believe

1:16:59

the reason everyone's talking about a lot

1:17:01

of rough stuff right now is we

1:17:04

are in the greatest era of blame

1:17:06

in a very long time. It

1:17:09

is everyone's fault but yourself. Right. And

1:17:12

that's because politicians are f***ing up everything,

1:17:14

so it's very easy to be like this, either

1:17:16

this side. Parenting has definitely got

1:17:18

a ride where it goes too far, one or

1:17:21

another. In general, there's tons of great parents. I

1:17:23

just think, you know, we're in a little bit of a pickle. People

1:17:26

lack civility, which is not nice

1:17:28

to each other. People are just

1:17:30

talking, so negative. People being

1:17:33

excited about people's downfalls, right?

1:17:37

I mean, I had a real moment on all this

1:17:39

stuff very recently with what happened with

1:17:41

Kate Middleton, right? What happened? You

1:17:43

know, I don't know, I always, I hate talking about things

1:17:46

I don't know, so I'm gonna go very headline reading. I

1:17:48

guess, you know, recently,

1:17:50

like, there was some, She

1:17:52

was like, you were a comedian, and there was like a cropped photo, and

1:17:54

everyone had jokes, and everyone had jokes, and she didn't

1:17:56

even video and said I have cancer. Wow.

1:18:00

And everyone's like, I'm

1:18:02

sorry. What do you mean I'm sorry? Or

1:18:05

I'm embarrassed. What about not doing it in the first

1:18:07

place? The f*** are you f***ing on

1:18:09

people for? I just

1:18:11

have a very simple question for people. Explain

1:18:14

to me any justification

1:18:19

on another human being. Yeah,

1:18:21

I guess the only thing I could think they might

1:18:23

be thinking is, well, to hold people accountable if they're

1:18:26

doing harm to others. Who the f*** are you? Yeah.

1:18:30

I am no, I love

1:18:33

when people are like, I have humility

1:18:35

would have been the next, as if

1:18:37

I'm supposed to, who the f*** are you

1:18:39

that you're supposed to

1:18:41

hold Kate Middleton accountable? Right. Who the

1:18:44

f*** do you think you are? I don't

1:18:46

think I'm supposed to hold anybody accountable

1:18:48

at some level, including

1:18:50

employees, children. You're part

1:18:53

of it. That's ego.

1:18:55

That's delusion. I'm

1:18:57

gonna hold you accountable for what? That

1:19:00

you married into the royal fit? What the f*** does it matter

1:19:02

with you? And sometimes when people

1:19:04

play this chess game with me, they go, but

1:19:06

what if somebody came up at you and punched

1:19:08

you in the face? My brain

1:19:10

goes into, that person's at a really f***ed

1:19:12

up place. Yeah.

1:19:14

Before I, you know, like, I just, I don't

1:19:16

think people have a good relationship with understanding

1:19:18

where anger, negativity, and darkness

1:19:20

comes from. It always comes

1:19:22

from a place of weakness. I

1:19:26

struggle to be mad at someone when

1:19:29

my first default thought is to have

1:19:31

compassion for them. Yeah, that's a superpower.

1:19:35

It's a blessing I see to my mom. I know

1:19:37

she gave me that DNA and then she obviously fostered

1:19:39

it, but it is how

1:19:41

I see the world. And I really wish the rest of the world

1:19:43

saw it that way too. Because I will tell

1:19:45

you what happens with that. You

1:19:48

don't have the capacity to hate someone for

1:19:51

being different than you when that happens. It doesn't

1:19:53

mean you have to allow it to continue to

1:19:55

happen. No, well, this is great boundaries. You know

1:19:57

what I mean? Yeah, this is, I love you

1:19:59

for that. I just feel

1:20:01

super in charge. Well Gary, I'm like, well

1:20:03

then I can stop talking to them. Well

1:20:06

what if it's your mom? You can stop talking

1:20:08

to your mom. I don't recommend it. I'd rather

1:20:10

you go through therapy, push, I'd rather something, they're

1:20:12

being, but you are fully in charge. Gary, everything,

1:20:15

I mean I had this dinner the other night.

1:20:17

Got a lot of dinners as you can hear.

1:20:20

But I'm getting hype right now. This

1:20:23

guy's like, everything's up in America. I finally looked at

1:20:25

him and said, move. Mm-hmm,

1:20:29

quit blaming. Move. Yeah. You

1:20:33

like Canada? Right. Epic, Mexico,

1:20:35

epic. I don't know, Sweden sounds nice. Like, Spain's

1:20:39

lovely this time of year. I don't, shut

1:20:41

the fuck up. And

1:20:46

I'm not saying that negatively. I'm saying

1:20:48

that encouragingly. Dwelling

1:20:51

and complaining and envy and

1:20:53

jealousy are massive weaknesses. I

1:20:55

go on Twitter and I look at

1:20:58

all of this and I'm like insecure, insecure,

1:21:00

insecure, insecure, insecure, insecure, and left, right, left,

1:21:02

right, insecure, insecure, insecure, insecure, insecure. Bad place,

1:21:04

bad place, bad place, bad. And

1:21:07

I'm not with judgment. With

1:21:10

deep hope

1:21:12

that I and many others that

1:21:15

are in a good place can figure out the

1:21:17

single word to say, do

1:21:20

the single podcast, write

1:21:22

the single book, post the

1:21:24

single quote that might help one of

1:21:26

those people say, okay. Because for me,

1:21:29

what has definitely made me successful and was a

1:21:31

kissing cousin to my inability to be candorous is

1:21:34

I care about positivity. I

1:21:36

don't do well in negativity. And

1:21:39

so I have this yearning to do it

1:21:41

for the world because I'm already full. It's like

1:21:44

back to the cup. Okay, my cup is

1:21:46

full. Well,

1:21:48

when you're lucky, and I think you're going

1:21:50

through this journey right now, so this is gonna be really understandable to

1:21:52

you. I'm good. Yeah.

1:21:55

What do you do next? How botherous. You

1:21:57

don't know what to do with it. It's

1:21:59

the only and it makes you feel good because you don't need

1:22:01

any more water. You're water school, you don't

1:22:03

have land. I'm good. Now,

1:22:06

I'm gonna end with this. Multiple

1:22:10

times a day, I have micro moments of like,

1:22:12

ooh, but they don't

1:22:14

have sustainability. Got it? You catch it

1:22:16

and you move on. We lost two big

1:22:19

clients yesterday. One in Asia, one in

1:22:21

Europe. There's a

1:22:23

lot of work to be done. But I'm

1:22:25

not like, I'm dead. Or

1:22:27

like, there's always something.

1:22:31

Two books that you got going on, Meet Me in the

1:22:33

Middle. I think everyone should be getting this, especially parents get

1:22:35

this so you can have this for your kids. Well, the

1:22:37

cool thing with Meet Me in the Middle and the cartoons

1:22:39

I'm doing this summer that are gonna

1:22:41

be launching on YouTube Kids is I'm making them both

1:22:43

for the parents and the kids. So

1:22:46

what I'm most excited about is when the parents

1:22:48

read this, I'm poking at them too. Of course.

1:22:50

And that is going to be, if I

1:22:52

pull anything off, if I pull off the dream I

1:22:55

have over the next 40 years, 50

1:22:57

years would be friends. Hopefully one of my 48, 98, I want 105.

1:23:00

So over the next 57 years, is

1:23:04

that I got to them both. Like

1:23:07

I dream so hard right now

1:23:09

that a parent is laying in bed with their five-year-old

1:23:11

reading it. And they're like, yeah. And

1:23:14

they're like, oh. I'm sorry, sorry about

1:23:16

that. So you

1:23:19

guys can get over copy, go on Amazon or

1:23:21

anywhere. Books are sold, meet me in the middle,

1:23:23

make sure you get this. Again, I don't think

1:23:25

day trading attention is as valuable unless you get

1:23:27

me in the middle first, because then

1:23:29

you can appreciate what you're creating in

1:23:32

your freelance business, solo entrepreneur, if

1:23:34

you're a career or whatever it might be. Day

1:23:37

trading attention. That said though, I think about you a

1:23:39

lot. Cause I met you when you were the LinkedIn

1:23:41

guy in 2009. And

1:23:43

then you were a pioneer in podcasting. What

1:23:45

is exciting about, what tricked me for so

1:23:47

long was the advice

1:23:50

that's tactical of the moment like this, it

1:23:52

works for everyone. It's not sustainable work if

1:23:55

you don't do the thing you're talking about.

1:23:57

So 2011 you. would

1:24:00

have read this and tripled. And

1:24:02

you would have texted me and be like, bro, I love you.

1:24:05

To your point, you would still have this

1:24:07

day of rec. You still had to get to that place.

1:24:10

And then that place becomes where you become

1:24:12

the ultimate version. Exactly. So get both obviously,

1:24:15

but day trading attention is about how to

1:24:17

actually build brand sales in the new social

1:24:19

media world. Again, this is

1:24:21

required reading from anyone in online marketing, social

1:24:23

media, content creation, business, make sure you get

1:24:25

a copy of this. It's step by step.

1:24:28

It's 20 years of

1:24:30

experience with Gary on social media and obsessive with

1:24:32

data and results and putting into one book. So

1:24:35

this is required reading. Of the moment, right? Of

1:24:37

the moment, yeah, of course. So this book was

1:24:39

called Jab, Jab, Jab Left Hook until the last

1:24:42

moment. Oh, it's okay. It's like,

1:24:44

I need to write this book every, I should

1:24:46

be writing it every year, like the dummies. But

1:24:50

right now I'm every 10 years and hopefully

1:24:52

I'll close the gap. But what I'm excited

1:24:55

about is it is pattern recognition expertise, but

1:24:57

it is of this second. Yes, absolutely. So

1:24:59

get that book. Two

1:25:02

final questions before I ask them I'll acknowledge

1:25:04

you again, Gary, for just being a real

1:25:06

human being, for being a real friend, for

1:25:08

showing up consistently for so many

1:25:11

people. I get personally in your life, but

1:25:13

for the world that follows your content, I

1:25:15

just appreciate how you continue to evolve, show

1:25:17

up. And the thing that I think I love

1:25:19

the most about you is how you took your health

1:25:21

to a whole nother level. Seven, eight years

1:25:24

ago, I think you went all in. 10

1:25:26

years ago. And I think that is for

1:25:28

me the most inspiring thing because people can

1:25:31

see the business success. I'm like, I want

1:25:33

that and then miss out on the health.

1:25:36

So the fact that you keep going all in

1:25:38

on that and you look better now than you

1:25:40

did 10 years ago is

1:25:42

something I really appreciate and respect because I

1:25:44

think that's what the world's gonna need more

1:25:46

of is focusing on their own health. I asked you

1:25:48

about your three truths before. I'm gonna skip this question.

1:25:50

I'm gonna go to the final question, which is what

1:25:53

is your definition of greatness? Mm. That

1:25:56

you gave more than you took. I

1:26:00

really, I really love

1:26:02

this talk. I'm excited about this podcast.

1:26:04

I think the extra time, usually I

1:26:07

do 45 or, you know, I

1:26:09

think the extra time slowed me down.

1:26:11

I think one of the reasons I'm not

1:26:13

good at being a podcast host is that

1:26:15

they're very, no really, they're very tight times.

1:26:18

I always have a meeting after, and

1:26:20

people get frustrated with me because I talk over

1:26:22

my guests because I'm not relaxed because I know

1:26:24

I don't have a lot of time, and I

1:26:26

want to get to a bunch of punch lines

1:26:29

for them, but then it becomes awkward, and I'm

1:26:31

talking over them, and I'm interrupting, like, Gary, he

1:26:33

just wants to talk, and the audience

1:26:35

is not wrong that gets frustrated by that version.

1:26:37

Some people love it because they have brains like

1:26:39

mine, but nonetheless, I

1:26:42

really do think we touched on the thing that is

1:26:44

greatness, which is like, look, one

1:26:47

of the things I've done well in my life

1:26:49

is I was attracted to older people my whole

1:26:51

life. When I was seven, 10, 13,

1:26:53

I'd always go and talk to 80, 90 year

1:26:55

olds at the bench, at the park. It was

1:26:58

big, and I used to think it was because I

1:27:00

didn't have grandparents. Because

1:27:02

I lost three of my four grandparents. I had

1:27:04

my grandma, Esther, thank God, and

1:27:06

I was like, oh, especially grandfathers, I would go

1:27:08

to a lot, so more specifically, I didn't have

1:27:11

grandfathers. I've

1:27:13

come to realize that's not true. It's that

1:27:15

I'm addicted to wisdom and the

1:27:17

actual game, and

1:27:20

I think greatness comes in, like,

1:27:24

there's been a lot of great athletes, and

1:27:27

again, I'm bringing up Kobe again because I'm so glad you

1:27:29

got to do that podcast. It's so devastating

1:27:31

that it's not on this earth. But

1:27:33

Kobe was different because he was more like us

1:27:35

in the way that, like, it wasn't that he

1:27:37

was just a great athlete. He

1:27:40

gave a about, like,

1:27:42

higher thinking and, like, competition

1:27:44

as a healthy, like, it

1:27:46

was just more thoughtful. Yes. And,

1:27:48

you know, I think that, I

1:27:51

think the reason he's revered is he gave to

1:27:53

us. Yes. Right? And

1:27:55

I think greatness comes in, like, I think

1:27:57

my mom is the greatest parent of all time.

1:28:00

And when I think about why I believe that

1:28:02

is, the

1:28:05

reason I believe that is there's others that tie

1:28:07

her, but they

1:28:09

can only tie her. Because my definition of a

1:28:11

parent is, there's many

1:28:13

things to it, but my personal subjective definition is,

1:28:15

how much did you give to those kids? And

1:28:19

I just think my mom gave it all, like all of it.

1:28:21

And I just know that that means for every other

1:28:24

mom and dad that has done that, they can only

1:28:26

tie my mom for the greatest, but it is a

1:28:28

giving game. And so I do

1:28:30

a lot of things of gaining, building

1:28:32

my companies and dollars and

1:28:34

followers and attention, I understand that.

1:28:37

But I'm outpacing it with my giving, and I

1:28:39

think I will continue to do that. And that

1:28:41

is where the V-friend strategy came from. I

1:28:44

was like, oh, I can take this. This

1:28:46

is what Disney, and actually now I realize,

1:28:48

this is why Sesame Street and Jim Henson

1:28:50

is a legend. And I'm gonna do that

1:28:53

too. I'm gonna create characters that

1:28:55

people are gonna fall over, but I'm gonna do

1:28:57

it around collectability, like Pokemon. Because

1:28:59

what I know about Pokemon and Marvel is

1:29:02

that old Gs still like it, whereas

1:29:04

Big Bird and Cookie Monster, we're done

1:29:06

with. But if I

1:29:08

take what's epic about, Pokemon doesn't

1:29:11

bring the value that

1:29:13

Sesame Street does. But

1:29:18

if I take the best of Sesame Street

1:29:20

and the best of Pokemon, and I smash

1:29:22

that together, and I put my marketing capabilities

1:29:24

and my collectible and business strategies, and I

1:29:26

build something, man, I can really leave

1:29:28

a positive impact. The one question I

1:29:30

wanted to ask you is, so

1:29:33

many of them, but one that's on my mind right now is, you've

1:29:36

always told me, and a

1:29:38

lot of your followers, ahead of time, this

1:29:41

is what's coming. Yes. You

1:29:43

are early Twitter, beyond Twitter, this is what's

1:29:46

happening, this is what's happening now, early

1:29:48

Instagram, Facebook, LinkedIn, you were always pushing the TikTok,

1:29:50

you were the first one on TikTok, Snapchat, I

1:29:53

remember you looking me in the eye saying, be

1:29:55

on Snapchat. That was the only

1:29:57

thing that didn't work for me, but everything else has worked

1:29:59

for me. Who

1:30:01

knows what's gonna happen with TikTok, Instagram,

1:30:03

Facebook, all of these different platforms when

1:30:07

we're thinking of attention in the future.

1:30:09

AI and fricking mobile devices and all these

1:30:11

things. Here are the things that have a

1:30:13

chance. As you know, what I'm great at

1:30:15

is not predicting, but moving so goddamn fast

1:30:17

when it happens. And then going all

1:30:20

in. Yeah, that I have that advantage. What

1:30:22

is coming? Here's things that

1:30:24

are coming. One, for people like you

1:30:26

and I, all of our content

1:30:28

in every language at scale. We've got a

1:30:30

million subscribers on Spanish on YouTube. In our

1:30:32

voice. Oh yeah, that's the key. That's what

1:30:34

we're working on now. So

1:30:37

I, and you've seen it

1:30:39

already, Dustin. We're pretty close, we're almost done. Mommy's

1:30:42

speaking every language. In my voice, in

1:30:44

my little high pitches, in me. That's

1:30:47

gonna be huge for every- Through AI, right?

1:30:49

Is there a tool specifically you're looking at that

1:30:52

you're- We're using vSpeech, or there's a button. I

1:30:54

mean, it's moving so- 50 of

1:30:56

them. This is how I hesitated, and I'm

1:30:58

a big fan of- Yeah, it may be gone. Yeah, it's, that

1:31:00

game is AI eating itself up. It's just

1:31:03

like crazy. So

1:31:06

AI. Virtual influencers. Oh

1:31:09

yeah, that's common. I've seen those. People are blowing

1:31:11

up already with, you mean just

1:31:13

like made up influencers. That's right. AKA

1:31:16

very attractive people. On Instagram,

1:31:18

that you're like- And

1:31:21

that will go, that will go not just, right

1:31:23

now the early movers like always are like models

1:31:25

and like all that. But

1:31:27

it will be full-plex. Ricky

1:31:29

Thompson, 47-year-old marketing expert,

1:31:32

who's gonna have 14 million

1:31:34

followers, and a Joanna

1:31:36

Thompson in Australia that actually

1:31:38

owns him. Isn't that crazy?

1:31:40

And is going, oh, it's gonna be huge. So virtual

1:31:43

influencers. Are you getting into some of that too?

1:31:45

Yeah, I'm really starting to go deep on that. Live

1:31:47

streaming as a more

1:31:49

scaled everyday thing. Let me explain what I mean

1:31:51

by that. Me saying

1:31:53

live streaming is important. It's not

1:31:56

Tysonet and like Aiden Ross and like

1:31:58

Ninja clicks. It's like plenty of people

1:32:01

are crushing on Twitch and other things. No,

1:32:03

I mean what I'm up to now, which is I have

1:32:05

a camera in my office on

1:32:07

mute for 13 hours

1:32:09

a day and I'm just sitting there

1:32:11

and entrepreneurial ASMR. It's mute. Mute, because

1:32:13

I'm having real meetings. So people are

1:32:16

watching you? Watching me. That's

1:32:18

right. And I try to unmute and that's a

1:32:20

good thing for me. He created an unmute counter

1:32:22

and I'm like looking at him like, oh, I

1:32:24

haven't unmuted yet. Hey, everyone did a like literally.

1:32:27

Wow. 13 hours a day? That's

1:32:29

right, people making pizza. People, I

1:32:31

predict in five years, someone who loves

1:32:33

to mow their lawn, mow

1:32:37

their lawn, dyslexia, mow their lawn,

1:32:40

will go from like that's that classic dad who

1:32:42

does it. The modern dad,

1:32:44

the 28 year old who's destined to be a 48

1:32:47

year old dad who loves to mow

1:32:49

their lawn, like loves it, is

1:32:51

destined right now as we're speaking to

1:32:54

one time in seven years as he's on that

1:32:56

journey, streaming it for

1:32:58

some weird reason. Today,

1:33:01

every 42 year old, 61 year old man

1:33:03

or woman that loves

1:33:05

to mow their lawn for an hour and a half, a big lawn, does

1:33:08

not think, let me set up a laptop and

1:33:10

stream live onto it. Does it cross their mind?

1:33:13

I believe it will become known. I believe one

1:33:15

of them will do it. I believe for whatever

1:33:17

reason it will crush. And I believe that person

1:33:19

will a year later retire from being a principal

1:33:22

in a high school to making

1:33:24

a million dollars a year. Mowing

1:33:26

their lawn. Live streaming it. Live streaming

1:33:28

it. So think of how different that is than what I

1:33:30

predicted would crush it. Remember what I predicted would crush it,

1:33:32

which was insane, which is influencers

1:33:35

are gonna make money. I mean, call it influencers, we didn't

1:33:37

have the term yet. People will

1:33:39

make money on the internet themselves. That

1:33:41

was like, right now,

1:33:43

somebody's like, wait a minute, I will

1:33:46

literally make a full time living by

1:33:49

streaming, making breakfast for my family

1:33:51

every morning. Let me just say

1:33:53

that, you know what I'm saying that is? Crazy, man. Literally

1:33:55

a mom or dad. Let's say a stay

1:33:58

at home dad or mom. Baby. is

1:34:00

literally gonna start streaming her 6am to

1:34:02

7.30 of prepping breakfast for everybody

1:34:04

and it's gonna capture a fever. And they're

1:34:07

gonna get millions of viewers every morning. And

1:34:09

they're gonna get subscribers for two bucks. Well,

1:34:11

they're gonna get merch deals. And

1:34:13

book deals, this, yeah. I'm

1:34:15

seeing if there's a guy on TikTok who goes live,

1:34:17

it must be all day, he's live, he owns a

1:34:19

little fruit stand. He's just cutting up fruit. And he's

1:34:22

got a massive line every day that just wants to

1:34:24

be in the stream for a second. That's right. Life

1:34:26

streaming, cutting fruit. It's crazy. The

1:34:30

extreme version of what I saw

1:34:32

happening with Crush It is about

1:34:34

to happen with live streaming because it takes it to

1:34:36

passive instead of progressive. I had to sit down

1:34:38

and do the line show. Now

1:34:40

it becomes passive. I will stream while

1:34:43

I'm running my wine store. But will people

1:34:45

watch hours of content

1:34:48

when you need to be five seconds

1:34:50

of videos that people are losing attention?

1:34:53

No, because people are watching long form content

1:34:55

at scale right now. You know this. You

1:34:58

just don't want to be in the middle. You

1:35:00

want to either be great at short form or you

1:35:02

want to be great at long form. You

1:35:04

just don't want to be the middle or you don't want to

1:35:06

be bad at long form or bad at short form. You could

1:35:08

make people binge watch an

1:35:11

entire season of something on Netflix or sit.

1:35:14

I have people that sit with me, you know this, sit

1:35:16

with me the whole night. That's crazy. They sit their

1:35:19

whole night and talk

1:35:21

to each other. That's crazy. Well, that's community.

1:35:23

I mean, it's amazing. It's crazy. It's

1:35:25

funny, it reminded me. You might remember this. When

1:35:27

I was coming up the game on Twitter and

1:35:31

Vidler and YouTube. What was it,

1:35:33

Periscope? Well, that was later

1:35:35

and Meerkat. Meerkat. But what

1:35:37

about before that? David Booth. You stream. You

1:35:39

just stream, man. You just stream. And that was

1:35:41

big for me. Wow, I remember that. I would

1:35:44

have been a huge streamer, but

1:35:46

now I'm too busy. So my, by

1:35:48

the way, couple hundred people, I have nothing because

1:35:50

I'm not, there's nothing. Now,

1:35:53

to Dustin and team's credit, now they're playing

1:35:55

my recent videos in the top right corner

1:35:58

during the live stream. I'm on

1:36:00

mute, but on the top right corner, a

1:36:02

smaller box is gonna be this, literally this.

1:36:06

And so we're figuring it out,

1:36:08

and again, I

1:36:10

think there's gonna be way more compelling ASMR.

1:36:12

I can tell you right now, it would've

1:36:14

been much more compelling to follow me tasting

1:36:16

wine all day. What I'm doing right

1:36:18

now is really boring. I'm sitting in an office for

1:36:20

like 12 hours a day just doing meetings. I'm

1:36:23

not even in the old DRock Daily V world

1:36:25

where I was moving around a lot. I'm in

1:36:28

full operations mode. I'm VaynerX and five friends

1:36:30

right now. I'm in one of those

1:36:32

moments. I'm not in Gary V land as much.

1:36:35

One final question then, be respectful of your time. Three

1:36:37

truths, I think you answered this probably five years ago

1:36:39

last time you're on. You said

1:36:41

you wanna live to 105. Yeah. Imagine

1:36:44

you get to create everything from this

1:36:46

moment until then. Okay. Your

1:36:49

vision, your relationships. You're absolutely. All of

1:36:51

it happens, but you have to take

1:36:53

everything with you. So once you

1:36:55

leave, no one has access to V friends,

1:36:58

creator media, it's all gone. All the

1:37:00

content you've created, gone. Erased from time.

1:37:02

Okay. Hypothetical scenario. No, I

1:37:04

like, you got me intrigued. Go ahead. So

1:37:06

I die at 105 and everything disappears. All

1:37:09

the content you've made, gone. Okay. Everyone

1:37:11

lives. What about the relationships I've made? Those are

1:37:13

there. Okay, got it. So content.

1:37:15

Content is gone. Got it.

1:37:18

Business content. Yeah, everything is gone.

1:37:20

But on your final day. Yeah. You

1:37:22

get to do one final live stream. Yeah. And

1:37:25

all you get to leave behind is three truths. Three

1:37:28

things you know to be true. If you could go

1:37:31

16 years in the future. I could do right

1:37:33

now. I would talk to them. Three things that all they can

1:37:35

have to remind you of. I'd say first of all, thank you

1:37:37

for this journey. I'm gonna miss every one of you deeply. This

1:37:39

sucks. I really wish I could go to 110. I

1:37:41

don't know why I said that. Right,

1:37:43

but three things you can leave behind. I would say

1:37:45

to them that like, you're in life. I

1:37:49

would say to everybody, I would hope that I would have

1:37:51

the entire 8 billion people on earth watching me on this

1:37:53

last day, if we all knew it was going down. The

1:37:56

first thing I would say to them is, I promise

1:37:58

you this is the most truth I've. learned in

1:38:00

105 years, in life you find what

1:38:03

you're looking for. If you

1:38:05

are looking for negativity and pain, you will find

1:38:07

it. And if you are looking for

1:38:09

joy and happiness, you will find it. And

1:38:13

I would expand on that in my three truths

1:38:15

because that's the game. You

1:38:17

find what you're looking for. If

1:38:19

you're in a good place, you're gonna find good. I

1:38:22

can't imagine, I'm just breaking out of this question for a

1:38:24

second. Bro,

1:38:27

I consume positive content all day while everyone's telling

1:38:29

me the world's never been worse. The world's never

1:38:31

been better. Can

1:38:34

I read some the other day of like pig

1:38:36

liver or whatever, something's about to go in our body now, like

1:38:38

we're gonna cure that one too. Like we're fixing. Like

1:38:41

the world was worse. Like it's

1:38:44

never been worse. I'm like, have you heard about the Holocaust?

1:38:48

The black plague? Like COVID was

1:38:50

fucked up. The black plague wiped out like

1:38:52

the majority of us. Like World

1:38:55

War I was nasty. Like

1:38:58

I just don't understand people's lack of perspective. So

1:39:00

I really am hot on that. Number one,

1:39:02

number two. That love is worth

1:39:04

fighting for. That you

1:39:07

must destroy yourself for

1:39:11

it. Meaning not destroy yourself, meaning

1:39:13

like stop what

1:39:15

you think you value if you don't

1:39:17

have it. A

1:39:19

current relationship that

1:39:21

might be comfortable, which

1:39:23

is very hard. I appreciate your reaction

1:39:25

to that. That's probably the hardest advice I just gave,

1:39:28

you know that you're in a relationship, but

1:39:31

it is not the right one,

1:39:33

but it's your children. It's comfortable,

1:39:35

real stuff. You like them. Like

1:39:38

you like them. That

1:39:40

love is worth fighting for. Okay. You

1:39:43

know? And the third one. And

1:39:47

it's so funny how simple my brain goes. Those

1:39:50

two really, really like choosing happiness

1:39:52

and love are so obvious to

1:39:54

me. You know what? I'm

1:39:57

a funny one. Cause I have a funny feeling that I would

1:39:59

go out funny. I

1:40:02

would go out with a good curse, I think. I

1:40:04

would say this, because I feel it very heavily right

1:40:06

now. Until you

1:40:09

realize that competition is one of the great

1:40:11

traits in life, that it

1:40:13

is good. That like anything,

1:40:15

out of balance, it's bad. But

1:40:18

the elimination of merit, the

1:40:22