0:00

I'm. Emily P. Freeman and welcome to the

0:02

next right thing. You're. Listening to

0:04

Episode three, Oh Nine. I'm.

0:08

An author, a spiritual director, and

0:10

an occasional workshop leader. I live

0:13

in the Piedmont of North Carolina

0:15

with my family and through my

0:17

work have helped thousands of spiritually

0:19

thoughtful people overcome decision fatigue so

0:21

that they can discern their next

0:24

right thing in faith. Work in

0:26

Life! You are enjoying this podcast

0:28

ad free because of the generous

0:30

support of subscribers to the sole

0:32

Minimalist on Sept Stack. You can

0:35

learn more and subscribe at Emily

0:37

P. Freeman.sub stack.com. Where we'll

0:39

continue the conversation about discernment and

0:41

decision making. For anyone who wants

0:43

to move beyond the pro Con

0:46

list. If you struggle with decision

0:48

fatigue, chronic hesitation, or if you

0:50

just need a few minutes away

0:52

from the constant stream of information

0:54

and the sometimes delightful but also

0:56

distracting hum of entertainment, you're the

0:58

right place for discerning your next

1:00

right thing. It's good.

1:02

To be back in my Pi chair.

1:04

Thanks to all of you who filled

1:06

out or reader and listener survey last

1:08

week. Your responses will help us so

1:11

much to know not only who you

1:13

are and what resonates the most, but

1:15

also where you live and what decisions

1:17

are giving you the most trouble these

1:19

days. Well, I've now declared January to

1:21

be the New Week between Christmas and

1:23

the New Year and in today's episode

1:25

will unpack how to make it so.

1:28

Listen And. From.

1:39

Winter Song by Ingrid Michaelson

1:42

and Cerebral Us. They.

1:45

Say that things just cannot grow.

1:47

Beneath. The Winter Snow. Or.

1:50

So I have been told. And.

1:53

So it's January. And.

1:55

Maybe you're wondering as I nearly always do

1:57

this time of year. If. it's

1:59

pie to enter gently and with

2:02

grace, even if the last

2:04

of December was wild and unruly, unpredictable

2:07

or full. Maybe

2:09

you had good intentions to spend that

2:11

very special week after Christmas and before

2:13

the new year in reflection and

2:16

in rest if you were able to get it. But

2:18

things didn't quite happen that way or something

2:21

came up or you just wanted to let

2:23

yourself off the hook from having

2:25

to do a thing, manage, plan,

2:27

scan, and manipulate your time into

2:30

something productive again. Well,

2:32

if that's you, I've got good news. As

2:34

I said, I'd declare January to be

2:37

the new week between Christmas and the

2:39

new year, which means instead of trying

2:41

to cram all that planning and reflection

2:43

into just one week, let's

2:45

spread it all the way out. Reflection

2:47

is a gift that doesn't respond kindly

2:50

to rushing. There's no wrong.

2:53

We'll enter gently and with care,

2:55

remembering all along the way, we

2:57

are not behind. In

2:59

other words, we've got time. Reflection

3:03

is a lifestyle, not an event.

3:06

So to enter January like a sole

3:08

minimalist is to believe that's true and

3:11

then to act accordingly. We'll

3:14

use some hopefully by now familiar movements

3:16

that we've repeated here often when we

3:18

talk about sole minimalism. But first,

3:21

let's review what we mean by the

3:23

phrase. You know the word soul

3:25

and you know the word minimalist. So what happens when

3:27

we put them together? Author

3:29

and minimalist Joshua Becker defines minimalism

3:31

as the intentional promotion of the

3:34

things we most tell you and the

3:36

removal of anything that distracts us from

3:38

it. We could say the

3:40

same thing about sole minimalism, except instead of

3:43

focusing on our external the sole

3:45

minimalist does this for their internal life.

3:48

In his book, Let Your Life Speak, Parker

3:51

J. Palmer poses the question,

3:54

is the life I'm living the same life that

3:56

wants to live in me? intend

4:00

to do with it. Listen for what

4:02

it intends to do with you. These

4:06

are words I've read and returned to for many years.

4:08

I've said them many times here on the podcast. And

4:11

it's a lovely sentiment, but the reality of

4:13

its practice might be

4:15

overwhelming because it's one thing to feel the

4:18

pressure of an unmade decision. It's another

4:20

to add the abstract expectation

4:22

of listening to your life.

4:25

So this could feel like a weight you're

4:27

unable to bear simply because you don't know

4:29

how. Well, the reality

4:31

of your inner life is never going

4:33

to arrive as a flashing headline in

4:35

clear English or clear language.

4:38

It's never going to come as a link in your

4:40

newsfeed that you can click and read all about it.

4:43

The life that wants to be lived in

4:46

us exists and it is there. But

4:48

we may not know what it is unless we

4:50

begin to turn our ear toward it and

4:53

make space for hearing those low

4:55

tones of desire and

4:57

gifting of community and

4:59

of calling. Cultivating

5:02

minimalism in the soul is one way to

5:04

do that. So the question

5:06

then becomes what do I

5:09

value most for my inner life and

5:11

what can I remove that will distract me from

5:13

it? If

5:15

you want to be more minimalistic in your home, then

5:18

you may get rid of all the stuff you're holding on to. As

5:22

a soul minimalist, I try to pay attention

5:24

to what has a hold on me.

5:27

What concerns are occupying my

5:29

imagination? What old questions am

5:31

I still carrying? And what

5:34

new questions have come up? To

5:36

answer some of these in

5:38

January, you'll want to engage in

5:41

the five movements of the soul

5:43

minimalist. The first is

5:45

to name your January posture. Now

5:48

for you, because this is the beginning of a year, you

5:51

might want to think of this just

5:53

for January or even extend it into

5:55

looking ahead for the whole year. What

5:58

might you want your January posture? general

6:00

posture to be this year. Perhaps

6:02

for you, that might come

6:04

in the form of choosing a word for the year. Maybe

6:06

you've already done that. You might

6:08

want to take the whole month to see

6:11

what rises up from within. If there are

6:13

themes that keep repeating in your questions, listen

6:16

to both your joys and

6:18

your anxieties, your eagerness and

6:20

your hesitations in order to

6:22

name this posture, or if

6:25

you like the practice of the one word for the year in

6:27

order to do that. These

6:29

joys, anxieties, eagerness and hesitation, all

6:31

of these are evidence of your

6:33

life and they will provide

6:36

important arrows to what you might want

6:38

your January or even your whole year

6:40

to be. We're

6:43

not trying to predict the future here. We're

6:45

simply trying to orient ourselves

6:47

in a particular direction on purpose

6:51

because the reality is we're going to

6:53

be moving in a direction anyway, so

6:55

why not give ourselves some time to

6:57

think about how we

6:59

might want to do that from the inside

7:01

out. A second

7:03

movement that can help with that practice is

7:06

to create space. I

7:11

mentioned last week that I've been writing online for

7:13

17 years now in

7:15

one form or another, and while

7:17

many, many things have changed, one of the things

7:20

that has remained the same and I can't remember

7:22

exactly when I came up with a tagline, but

7:25

it was early on and it was that

7:27

I write to help create space for your

7:29

soul to breathe. This

7:31

concept of creating space

7:34

has remained with me. It's looked different over the

7:36

years. I've done it in different ways and

7:38

maybe with some different emphasis,

7:41

but the concept has always been there and I hope

7:43

it always will be. Here

7:46

even though we're talking about soul minimalism, this

7:48

may be where you do want to create

7:50

some literal space in your life. Some

7:53

of you may have left your own Christmas tree

7:55

up, for example, in Philippiifany and now that's past,

7:58

so you're doing the closure work of moving. moving

8:00

it out and making physical room

8:02

in your actual space. For

8:04

what? Maybe you know or maybe you

8:06

don't. Maybe you leave that

8:08

space where the tree was actually empty.

8:11

Just to kind of see

8:13

what it might inspire. Well, the same can

8:16

go for your inner life. You might

8:18

want to create some space in the form

8:20

of time by setting a timer and just

8:22

listening to the silence or putting time on

8:24

your calendar like it's an appointment. But

8:27

really, it's just time for you to think and dream

8:29

a bit. And when I say to put it on

8:31

your calendar, I mean you could schedule 30 minutes like

8:33

you would a phone call or a Zoom meeting. But

8:36

instead of showing up for a phone call and having to

8:38

have a Zoom meeting, you actually get to just think and

8:40

be a person and dream a little bit and look out

8:42

the window. That's what I mean by

8:44

creating space. Maybe you just

8:46

need to schedule some time for

8:49

your soul to catch up to your

8:51

body, as Eugene Peterson so eloquently put

8:53

it. The third

8:55

movement is to ask yourself,

8:57

what needs my attention? When

9:00

you get that time that you schedule, however small it

9:02

is, ask yourself one question. What

9:05

needs my attention? This is

9:07

a question for a gentle January, one that

9:10

may take the whole month or more to

9:12

answer. What needs your attention,

9:14

body, mind, and soul? What

9:16

needs your attention at work, at home, and your

9:18

family? What needs your attention in

9:20

your heart, in your conversations,

9:23

in your physical surroundings? In

9:25

your physical response? This doesn't

9:27

mean you are automatically to act and

9:29

to fix anything. But

9:31

naming what needs your attention can be

9:33

a clarifying practice, even if you

9:35

aren't sure what to do next. The

9:39

fourth movement of a soul minimalist is

9:41

to choose your absence. In

9:44

Kevin DeYoung's book Crazy Busy, he

9:46

says this, The

9:48

biggest deception of our digital age may

9:50

be the lie that says we can

9:52

be omnipotent, uninformed,

9:55

and omnipresent. We

9:57

must choose our absence. Our

10:00

inability. And. Our ignorance. And

10:03

she slightly. As

10:06

you set goals to the word for

10:08

the year, plan your schedule whatever you're

10:10

doing as you look ahead. Develop

10:13

the habit of choosing your absence

10:15

on purpose as you plan. Rather,

10:18

Than having it be chosen for you by default.

10:21

And so getting quiet and listening to the

10:23

heartbeat of your own life. Rather

10:25

than looking outside of yourself for better.

10:27

More important opportunities is gonna be

10:29

key to the fourth movement which

10:32

is in your absence. Choose

10:34

your absence so that your presence

10:36

will have more impact. This.

10:39

Will not be easy, specially if your

10:41

fear of missing out is particularly strong.

10:44

But. If you keep your true values

10:46

before you wait really matters to

10:48

you in the season. This

10:50

will help you to not make decisions based

10:52

on that fear of missing out. Or.

10:55

On some type of vanity reason like

10:57

what my impress someone else or even

10:59

what someone of might expect. Your.

11:02

Work is your or. Your.

11:05

Pace. Is. Your pace,

11:08

You don't have to keep pace with

11:10

anyone else. I.

11:16

Mean number Five: The Sit movement.

11:18

Is. To plan your. Presence. In

11:21

other words, Where. Do you want to

11:23

show up in January? Where. Do you want

11:25

to show up this year? To.

11:28

Help consider your own presence You

11:31

could ask what would be inner

11:33

life giving for me this season?

11:36

Or. This year. You. Could

11:38

even look at it in terms of quarters. How

11:40

do I want to show up in. Winter.

11:43

Spring. Summer Fall. How can

11:46

I planned my presence first and on

11:48

purpose? Before. All the other

11:50

things start to crowd out. The things

11:52

that I might wanna do on purpose. One

11:55

of the things that can help. To

11:58

think about this, this movement about. Planning

12:00

your presence is to keep Doctor

12:02

Sondra Dalton Smith's seven Types of

12:05

rest and mind in her book

12:07

Sacred Rest. She identifies the seven

12:09

types as says a cold. Mental.

12:13

Emotional. Sensory.

12:16

Create. Is. So so

12:18

and spiritual. These

12:21

are all types of brass that we all

12:23

need and we might be burnt out in

12:25

one of them and not realize that that's

12:27

actually a type of rest that we just

12:29

haven't thought to cultivate on our own lives.

12:31

And so as we enter into January like

12:33

a soul minimalist it means, rather than looking

12:36

at the seven areas of rest and naming

12:38

where we really need a break. Use

12:40

this list to look ahead and to plan

12:42

your presence to the extent that you have

12:45

the ability to do so that my not

12:47

not always be possible but thinking about how

12:49

do I want to show up and nice

12:52

seven areas of my life on purpose. So.

12:54

As to minimize future burn out in

12:57

one of these areas. For. Example

12:59

A type. Of rest that I often

13:01

overlooked but always seem to need is sensory

13:03

rest is not something that I plan for

13:05

those. So usually I only realized that I

13:08

need that type of rest. Once.

13:10

I haven't.net and it's too late. So

13:13

a way to be a so minimalist in

13:15

January. Is to look ahead

13:17

into the year and see places

13:19

where I might become over simulated

13:21

sensory wise like if I've been

13:24

traveling a lot. For example, look

13:26

at the calendar and see what's

13:28

coming up and maybe begin to

13:30

anticipate. Okay, where my probably going

13:32

to need some sensory rest and

13:34

go ahead and plan of focus

13:36

day or planet rejuvenation day after

13:38

an event where I might be

13:41

overly simulated did it on the

13:43

front end and of realizing it.

13:45

And. Needing to to take a sensory arrest

13:47

during a time when they didn't plan

13:49

for execute? Get it? So it's just

13:51

a practice. of looking ahead. And

13:54

planning as much as were able to we're not always

13:56

able to a doing it on purpose on the phone

13:58

and. That. Is and bleeding. The

16:00

bigger truth is our daily decisions are

16:02

making our lives. As always,

16:04

you can find me online

16:07

at emilypfreeman.com or on

16:09

Instagram at emilypfreeman and you can join

16:11

the soul minimalist for just $5 a

16:13

month on subsec where we

16:15

continue the conversation we begin here

16:17

on Tuesdays. Even if

16:19

you can't swing the $5 a month right now,

16:21

you can still join at the free level where

16:24

you'll receive weekly updates of what we're talking about

16:26

so you can join in when

16:28

resources allow and the conversation really piques

16:30

your interest. Thanks to

16:32

the team at Immutable who faithfully edits

16:34

our sound and to Ashley Sherlock who

16:37

creates our show notes and keeps this

16:39

podcast organized. Well y'all

16:41

we've got just nine weeks, nine weeks

16:43

until the release of How to Walk

16:45

Into a Room which is my brand

16:47

new book coming out March 12th. If

16:50

you pre-order now we'll let you know very

16:52

soon about some free gifts we'll send your

16:54

way. We're just finalizing some of those details.

16:57

In the meantime if you've already pre-ordered or if

16:59

you do so now or any time between

17:01

now and March the 12th you will be able

17:03

to get access to those free gifts as

17:05

soon as we announce them. So order

17:08

now and hang on to your receipt. We'll

17:10

put a direct link in the show notes to make

17:12

it easy for you to pre-order but just so you

17:14

know you can basically pre-order

17:16

How to Walk Into a Room wherever

17:19

you like to order books. So support

17:21

your favorite indie, go to Amazon, Barnes

17:23

& Noble, whatever makes sense for you

17:25

and your heart. But as you do

17:27

so save that receipt and then you

17:29

can redeem your bonuses when

17:31

they're ready. Y'all I think you're gonna love

17:34

it. That's all I'm gonna say. Well

17:36

in closing a poem by

17:38

Wendell Berry called The

17:41

Cold. How

17:45

exactly good is it to know myself in

17:47

the solitude of winter? My

17:49

body containing its own warmth divided

17:51

from all by the cold and

17:54

to go separate and sure among the trees

17:56

cleanly divided thinking of

17:59

you perfect too. and your solitude,

18:01

your life withdrawn into your own

18:04

keeping. To be clear, poised

18:07

in perfect self- suspicion toward

18:09

you as though frozen, and

18:12

having known fully the goodness of

18:14

that, it will be

18:16

good also to melt. Thanks

18:21

for listening, and I'll see you next

18:23

time.