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Shawn Ryan on the Physical and Emotional Toll of War, the Military-Industrial Complex, and Real Life Angels | Ep. 802

Shawn Ryan on the Physical and Emotional Toll of War, the Military-Industrial Complex, and Real Life Angels | Ep. 802

Released Monday, 27th May 2024
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Shawn Ryan on the Physical and Emotional Toll of War, the Military-Industrial Complex, and Real Life Angels | Ep. 802

Shawn Ryan on the Physical and Emotional Toll of War, the Military-Industrial Complex, and Real Life Angels | Ep. 802

Shawn Ryan on the Physical and Emotional Toll of War, the Military-Industrial Complex, and Real Life Angels | Ep. 802

Shawn Ryan on the Physical and Emotional Toll of War, the Military-Industrial Complex, and Real Life Angels | Ep. 802

Monday, 27th May 2024
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0:00

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funturns50.com Welcome

1:03

to the Megyn Kelly Show, live on Sirius

1:05

XM Channel 111 every weekday

1:07

at noon east. Hey

1:14

everyone, I'm Megyn Kelly. Welcome to the Megyn Kelly

1:16

Show. On Memorial Day, we remember and

1:18

honor the men and women who have died while

1:21

in military service. Every year,

1:23

we welcome a military veteran here on this

1:25

show to share their story. And today I'm

1:28

very excited to talk to Sean Ryan for

1:30

the very first time. Sean's

1:32

a former U.S. Navy SEAL and CIA

1:34

contractor with 14 years

1:36

of service spanning multiple combat

1:39

operations. He is also the

1:41

host of the hugely popular The

1:43

Sean Ryan Show, where he has

1:45

an audience of millions on YouTube, podcast

1:47

platforms and more. This is

1:49

where he goes in-depth, and I mean in-depth,

1:52

with a host of guests for fascinating

1:54

conversations on a whole range of subjects.

1:57

Sean developed the show to document the untold stories of

1:59

war veterans. war, loss, and

2:02

redemption. And he does that in much, much

2:04

more. Hey

2:06

guys, Conan O'Brien here to tell you about some

2:08

of the stranger things we've been doing recently on

2:10

my podcast, Conan O'Brien Needs a Friend. Recently

2:13

we had an episode where I sat

2:15

down with some

2:17

of the writers that I worked with on Conan O'Brien

2:19

Must Go. That's my travel show

2:22

on Max. And we talked

2:24

about everything that goes into those shows and

2:27

a lot of very insane anecdotes

2:29

from our travels and adventures. There's

2:32

another episode you might want to

2:34

check out where I discuss with

2:37

my physician, Dr. Arroyo, about

2:40

my experience on Hot Ones. We talk about my

2:43

near-death experience and

2:45

his complete inability to

2:47

help me because he may or may not be a

2:50

real doctor. That's just some of

2:52

the stuff that's been going on. And if you

2:54

feel up to it, check it out. So catch up on

2:56

all things I've been up to on Conan O'Brien Needs a

2:58

Friend wherever you get your podcasts. Glad

3:02

to welcome him here in person for this

3:04

special episode. Sean, welcome. Thank you for

3:07

having me. Thank you for your service to kick

3:09

it off. Oh, thank you for saying that. I

3:11

appreciate that. I appreciate it too. It's

3:13

hard on Memorial Day because it's a solemn

3:16

day, right? But people

3:18

are out there trying to get their big

3:20

TV. And I understand that, right? People

3:22

are like, they work hard. But

3:25

you got to take a moment or an hour or two

3:27

just to stop and think about why you have the freedom

3:29

to shop where you want and wear what you want and

3:31

say what you want and do what you want. And

3:33

that boils down to you guys, you and the

3:35

friends you've lost. Well, thank you. So

3:38

let's talk about you and your background and

3:40

how you wound up a Navy SEAL because

3:42

it takes a certain kind of person. I

3:45

know this from my many interviews with SEALs

3:48

over the years. It's not like you're

3:51

not normal people. I think that's fair to say. Am

3:53

I wrong? That's fair to

3:55

say. Okay. And so when, tell

3:57

us what you were like as a child

3:59

because there are always some. signs of a

4:01

future Navy SEAL in there, whether it's a

4:04

rebellious kid or a leader or obsessive about

4:06

something. Yeah, Jaco said his parents wouldn't let

4:08

him quit anything. Like if he took up

4:10

knitting, they wouldn't let him quit knitting. So

4:13

looking back at your own childhood, were there signs

4:15

of the future you there? There

4:19

probably were. I was definitely

4:21

very rebellious, not

4:23

a great student, not a great listener,

4:26

very creative, and

4:30

just not very academic

4:32

at all. So

4:35

the SEAL teams kind of came on

4:37

my radar. I

4:41

don't remember exactly, but I was always infatuated

4:44

with the military. When

4:46

I was growing up, the Gulf War was going on, and I

4:49

remember picking up all the magazines and

4:52

all that stuff and just looking at

4:54

all the pictures, really into GI

4:56

Joes. And

5:01

it got to the point where when

5:04

I got to high school, like I

5:06

said, I wasn't an academics guy. I

5:09

wasn't interested in school, and

5:11

I definitely wasn't going to do well

5:13

in college. So I

5:16

decided to look into the military.

5:19

Alternative. Did you come from

5:21

a military family? Not exactly.

5:23

I mean, my dad did serve. He was

5:25

a pharmacist in the Army.

5:27

So definitely a totally

5:30

different role, different direction. He

5:33

had no interest in the medical field at all. So

5:38

I started looking at the Marine Corps. I

5:41

wanted to be a recon guy. They wouldn't let me in.

5:44

I went to the Army, wanted to be a Green

5:46

Beret. They wouldn't let me in. The

5:49

Navy recruiter kind of stuck his head out

5:51

and asked if I'd ever heard

5:53

of the SEAL teams and I hadn't at the

5:55

time. So he

5:57

gave me endless material. To

6:00

pick thorough. And so I did that. Are.

6:03

Very. Fast and end.

6:06

When. I realized what it was of.

6:09

Oh it's captivated me. So how does

6:11

a guy who's not. In. A devoted

6:13

to his academics which does require the

6:15

kind of tenacity and hard work you

6:17

put into become a seal signed it.

6:19

It in order to go through buds

6:22

training and actually perform a that elite

6:24

level as soldier. ah I mean I

6:26

don't this is the only thing that

6:28

caught my interest you know and so

6:31

not. and really and school com my

6:33

interest and dad and I never really

6:35

felt challenge i don't think and so.

6:38

That. Be there was a multitude of things

6:40

I've I've. I wasn't

6:42

the. Top performer out of

6:45

three siblings ah and sports.

6:47

Or. An academic. So where were you in the

6:49

birth order on first and where'd you grow up?

6:52

I grew up. We. Moved around a

6:54

lot of primarily Missouri. Okay, keep

6:56

on a bomb. Yap. Yap!

6:59

first born and so.

7:03

I got in there and dumb and been

7:05

that. Long. So. Long.

7:07

Story short: people die then, but. I.

7:09

Just wanted to do something one

7:11

I wanted Sir By time Cherry

7:14

and I wanted to finally. Give.

7:17

My parents are reasonably proud of me,

7:19

and so that kind of carried me

7:21

through. And were they when

7:23

you signed up at first where they. Put.

7:26

Your with that event. That. Would ban

7:28

two thousand Two thousand. Know.

7:31

It. But. When I signed up who's two

7:33

thousand and one of the Razr is before Nine

7:35

Eleven. Those right before Nine Eleven I'd I'd I

7:37

went. To the Navy to

7:39

boot camp in July. Two thousand one

7:41

and. I. Guess little dish you know or

7:44

was about to happen to the country

7:46

The world. And you they are. So

7:49

he parents proud when you signed up where they.

7:52

I think they were. They were

7:54

definitely worried it. Surprised I'm gonna

7:56

came out of left field. And.

8:00

So, but, but once they wrapped their head

8:02

around it and saw that I was, I

8:05

seem to be seriously, they, they, they

8:07

fully supported it. See, that's

8:09

how I feel. I would love for I'll

8:11

be sexist, my boys to serve,

8:14

but I'd be terrified. If they actually said they were

8:16

going to do it, I'd be in church every day,

8:18

praying to God, lighting every candle in the church.

8:21

You know, I, I can see what your

8:23

parents went there and I'm sure most parents go through that,

8:25

especially if it's not a lifelong military family. Yeah.

8:28

Yeah. I would do. I

8:30

have two little ones now. So yeah, I

8:32

get it. And you know, especially

8:34

if you're looking at your kids so far, he's been kind

8:36

of a knucklehead. I

8:38

don't think this kid should have a gun. I don't know.

8:41

Not sure how this is going to go. Very true.

8:43

So there had to be some concerns there. And

8:45

what just out of curiosity, what did your siblings wind

8:47

up doing? My brother

8:49

is in hospitality and my sister, uh,

8:52

has her hair salon. Okay. So they did not,

8:54

they did not, they were not tempted to follow

8:56

you down this road. Now. All right.

8:59

So you decide to join up

9:01

for military service and not just any military service,

9:03

not just like, I don't know, the, the

9:05

regular infantry, uh, with the army. You

9:08

decide to go for Navy SEALs. So

9:10

inside there's an overachiever just

9:12

waiting to be born. And

9:14

did you know anything about how hard that

9:17

was going to be? I

9:19

did. Once I started researching that, I just,

9:21

I didn't care. I was just,

9:24

I was going to do it. And, uh, I

9:27

felt great all the way up

9:29

until I arrived at super burning.

9:33

And, uh, in my mind, I was amazing right

9:35

up until I started. Exactly. And, uh, I mean,

9:37

when I got there, I was 18 and,

9:40

you know, barely a man. And

9:43

when I got there, there were guys that had, there

9:46

were Olympic athletes. There

9:48

were guys that had already been to war

9:50

and come back. Uh,

9:52

guys that have been to Panama guys that have been

9:54

to Iraq. It was, it was, uh,

9:58

championship boxers. And

10:00

I was probably about a buck, buck

10:03

30. Wow. Now,

10:06

is this why I read you got laughed out

10:08

of one of the recruiting offices? Yeah,

10:10

that would be the Army and the Marines.

10:13

Yeah, okay. The Marine Corps told you no. This

10:16

is a common story. I've heard this from

10:18

a few of our Navy sailbuds that they

10:20

got laughed at when they tried to sign

10:22

up. What is it with the Army? Are

10:24

the Marines just like, hmm? I

10:26

think, I mean, it's just, you know, it's pretty

10:29

ambitious to walk in and say, hey, I want

10:31

to operate

10:33

at the top level right

10:35

away. And

10:37

they're kind of like, okay, guy, pump

10:40

the brakes, maybe do infantry, go

10:42

the long route. And I just, I had no

10:44

interest in going the long route. I

10:46

didn't want to do regular infantry.

10:48

There's nothing wrong with that, but I

10:51

just wanted the challenge. Do

10:54

you remember back in those early days when you

10:56

were first starting to train, what jumped

10:58

out at you amongst

11:00

the guys who surrounded you? Like,

11:02

were there commonalities in this

11:04

pocket of the world that were immediately

11:06

noticeable as different? Once

11:08

I got to, to buds. Or even when you just

11:11

first signed up and started training, because you didn't go

11:13

right to buds training, right? Don't you do normal training

11:15

before? You do normal training before. I mean,

11:17

I grew up in a town of 6,000 people.

11:19

So there wasn't, there wasn't, there

11:22

wasn't that many people that wanted to do

11:24

this. I

11:27

remember the first time I met, they

11:30

called him a SEAL motivator. He

11:32

was, he was kind of a guy that would

11:34

go around, I don't know the country who was

11:36

a SEAL. And then now he's,

11:39

he's teaching how

11:42

to swim and, and, and kind of

11:44

refining some of your techniques with running

11:46

and swimming and, and some

11:48

things that you might expect. And

11:52

he had, he just carried himself

11:54

different than, than anybody else.

11:56

I'd been around before. So

11:59

there's. There's definitely

12:01

a type. Now,

12:04

knowing what you know, does

12:06

that come from combat or

12:09

just the grueling nature of SEAL

12:11

training? Guys who are going through

12:13

it today, can they get that without actually going

12:15

into combat like you have? Oh, I

12:17

think so. I mean, I

12:19

do believe that. So the Navy will get

12:22

it into you? They will. They'll figure out

12:25

a way. I'm thrilled

12:27

and impressed and want to do it. A secret version

12:29

of myself would love to try this. I don't think I

12:31

can. I can't really even make it through 10 minutes

12:34

of jumping jacks in my hit class. But

12:36

in my mind, this could happen

12:39

for me someday. And

12:41

we've had lots of tough guys come on here and

12:43

talk about how the toughest guys they knew didn't

12:46

make it through training. Just couldn't make it

12:48

through. It's just a mind over matter kind of

12:50

situation. But you're telling me you didn't have anything

12:53

in your past that told you

12:55

you could put mind

12:57

over matter and accomplish this? No, I

12:59

didn't. I didn't. And so

13:01

it was, I mean, I was an 18-year-old

13:03

kid at Buds. And

13:07

it was, I mean,

13:10

it's scary to see who quits. You

13:12

know, I mean, you're seeing people that you look

13:14

up to, people that, I mean, you're

13:17

constantly measuring up to somebody else and

13:19

comparing yourself to somebody else and going,

13:21

oh, you know, if

13:24

that guy didn't make it, I

13:26

don't think I have a chance. And

13:29

so you just put your

13:31

head down and drive on and try to make it to

13:33

the next meal, try to make

13:35

it to the next day and just

13:38

keep driving on. And

13:40

I get to the point where I wanted

13:42

to quit. But

13:47

I could not face calling my parents

13:49

and tell them that I

13:51

had failed again. Oh, wow. So.

13:54

Yeah, I've had guys say there was no way I

13:56

was going to see my father's name on that hat

13:58

and ring that bell. Oh, me. So

14:03

you talked a little bit

14:06

about your upbringing. Was it a modest upbringing?

14:08

Like what kind of childhood did you

14:10

have? Yeah, I mean, I would

14:13

say upper middle class upbringing

14:16

and small town. We moved around

14:18

a lot, probably moved over 10

14:20

times in my childhood.

14:24

But we finally settled in

14:26

Missouri in a small farm

14:28

town known as Chillicottie, Missouri.

14:30

And I haven't been back there in several years. But

14:34

I liked full

14:36

contact sports, tried football,

14:38

was too small, couldn't make it,

14:40

got into wrestling, was a mediocre

14:42

wrestler, nothing. Nothing, no

14:44

state championships or anything like

14:46

that. Just kind of an

14:48

average kid, troublemaker, really into

14:50

booze and

14:53

partying. And

14:56

yeah, I mean, that was my childhood.

14:59

Did you have strict parents? They

15:02

tried to be strict, but... You

15:05

managed to find ways around it. I would...

15:07

That was the future CAA contractor. That's

15:09

the foundation that was being laid. Little did

15:12

they know, this is important research for you.

15:14

Yeah, good point. Good point. But yeah, I

15:16

mean, they were definitely against a lot of

15:18

the things that I was doing. They

15:20

were not happy that

15:22

I was drinking. They were not

15:25

happy with some of the crowd that I was

15:27

running around with. They were not happy with my

15:29

grades. And yeah,

15:33

like I said, when it came time

15:35

to make some decisions on

15:37

what I'm gonna do with my future, I had to take

15:40

a hard look. And

15:43

so I went the military route. I

15:47

was just talking to Riley Gaines not long

15:49

ago. She was talking about how she's this

15:51

competitive swimmer, and now she's an activist on

15:53

the trans insanity that's happening to women. And

15:56

she was talking about how her dad put her in

15:58

the pool one time and just made her be... in that

16:00

pool for some eight to 10 minutes freezing cold.

16:02

It was not a summer pool. He pulled off

16:04

the cover during the winter, made her get in.

16:07

And it was an exercise in mental toughness. You

16:09

know, just to like, you're not cold. You got

16:11

to get, that's you guys. You do,

16:13

you do that every day during seal training.

16:16

When you're a seal, it's horrid and

16:18

it is somewhat tortuous from what I've heard.

16:21

So when you finally see yourself in those situations,

16:24

how do you, how do you say, I'm not quitting, how do you

16:26

get through? How do you get from minute 10 to a minute 11

16:29

to a minute 12? I

16:32

mean, it, you just

16:34

have to dig deep. I mean, it's

16:37

not, it's not, it is very physical,

16:39

but it's more mental. And so everybody,

16:42

everybody in training is going to break.

16:44

They're just, it's going to happen. And

16:47

it just, you get to this

16:49

point where you go numb. You

16:55

get to this point where you go numb and,

16:58

and then it just doesn't matter anymore.

17:00

Nobody, nobody really quits after I think

17:02

Wednesday night is the day where it's

17:04

very, very rare for anybody to quit,

17:06

but it's just, it's

17:09

breaking time down. And, and instead of going, I'm

17:11

going to make it through this entire

17:14

six months. It's I'm going to make it

17:17

to hell week. And then when you get

17:19

to hell week, it's I'm just going to make it to the

17:21

next meal, or I'm going to make it to the next med

17:23

check. And, and by

17:25

Wednesday night, I mean, you, you haven't

17:27

slept. Remind me of when it starts.

17:29

It starts, I think it starts on

17:31

Sunday night and I believe it's done

17:34

Friday night. Okay. It's five days with

17:39

minimal sleep, but, but your

17:42

muscles break down. You get, what

17:45

do they call it? Elephantitis. Your, your ankle

17:47

starts swelling up. You're, I had that when

17:50

I was pregnant. Oh, really? No, I mean,

17:52

it just happens naturally. Everything

17:54

falls up. Yeah. But,

17:56

but it's, it's just,

17:59

It's, it's doing. those little time action just break

18:01

it down and make and to the next meal

18:03

making it to the next match Jack. Jack.

18:06

In Your Body's by Wednesday, you

18:09

know it's pretty tight group. everybody's

18:11

pretty much gone and. And

18:13

you kind of just going to. Maybe.

18:16

The slow state. You. Know and

18:18

and adjust your just move on.

18:20

So yeah, It sounds kind of transcendent

18:22

in away. So then

18:24

you have to actually be a Navy Seal,

18:27

which is no easier. Yeah, and

18:29

especially when you complete your training in July.

18:31

Two thousand and one. All hell

18:33

breaks loose in the country in the world. And.

18:37

How many combat deployments did you

18:39

have? Would the seal

18:41

James I had to combat filaments

18:43

to Iraq and Afghanistan. Yeah, ok.

18:46

In two and two different seal teams. Yeah,

18:49

so there was. So. When I

18:51

got. Into. The Seal team

18:53

those around two thousand and three. And

18:56

the first deployment we want

18:58

to Germany which was a

19:00

really boring deployments and then

19:03

we went to Afghanistan. ah

19:05

in the. Late.

19:08

Summer of Oh Five I believe. And.

19:12

The hell are we there? We

19:14

were only there for three months so

19:16

it was. It was right after Redwings

19:19

happen. Are you familiar with ramblings? The

19:21

Lone Survivor? Oh yes. Great roles as

19:23

as had Marcus on his amazing yeah

19:26

so we really of them are After

19:28

that happened I was the biggest sealed

19:30

him the biggest loss insult him history

19:33

of the time and it was. The

19:36

So Com was doing a surge

19:38

where they want they needed more

19:40

guys and so. They. Sped up

19:42

the deployment cycle that someone from

19:44

Silty made to sell team to.

19:46

Our. Did my Afghanistan deployment will

19:49

seal team to. We.

19:52

We didn't do a whole lot there are there

19:54

was a lot of those lot of political stuff

19:56

going on after that. Operation.

19:59

And. To

20:01

be 100% honest, I was really

20:04

dissatisfied. I went to the teams

20:06

to go to war and to

20:08

fight for the country, and I

20:11

wasn't getting enough. I think we did

20:13

one direct action. That

20:16

entire deployment took a couple of prisoners. No

20:19

shots fired. And

20:22

then we got – our admiral pulled

20:24

us out of the country. And so

20:27

at that point, I kind of made a decision.

20:30

For me, this wasn't what I

20:32

had expected. And so I

20:34

told my leadership, I said,

20:36

hey, this is going to be

20:38

my last pump. I'm not doing

20:41

another one. I'd like to finish my Lisbon out

20:44

on deployment. So we

20:46

had a sister platoon that was in

20:48

Baghdad that was running a lot of

20:50

sniper operations. And

20:52

so I volunteered to go there, and they threw

20:55

my name in the hat, and I got lucky. I

20:58

volunteered to go to Baghdad in 2000 – That

21:01

would have been 2000, late 2005 or 2006. I

21:07

mean, the worst absolute time to

21:09

be in Baghdad for anybody who's

21:11

not ready to fight and kill and risk their life.

21:13

I mean, that was just a devastating time. I

21:16

remember just as a journalist covering those

21:18

years, and that's when all the beheading

21:20

started. It was bad. It

21:23

was about as bad as it could be. I

21:25

mean, it's amazing. Again, it being Memorial Day,

21:27

I have to think about guys like you who

21:29

volunteered to go into it, the guys

21:31

who volunteered to go into the buildings

21:33

on 9-11 at great risk to themselves,

21:35

and then their brothers in arms

21:38

in a way who volunteered to go into the fire in

21:40

a different way a couple years after that. We

21:42

all have a lot to be thankful for. So

21:44

how long were you there? I

21:47

was in Baghdad for about four months,

21:49

and so we got there. The

21:52

operational tempo was pretty slow at first. There

21:54

was an election going on, if I remember.

21:59

And then – We were

22:02

on the hook to do protection

22:04

for the Iraqi

22:08

government officials. And

22:11

nothing was happening. So we wound up the

22:14

lieutenant through our name in the hat to

22:16

just help conventional units who

22:19

were getting blown up on

22:21

their reconnaissance routes,

22:23

supply routes, whatever the routes were. I mean,

22:25

there was they had these bombs

22:28

called over there, which were, I

22:31

don't know if you remember, maybe you covered this,

22:33

but they would basically put them on

22:36

the side of the road and they could

22:38

be triggered by our lasers. So they would

22:40

pick up heat sensitivity to engine

22:43

blocks and they had

22:46

the timing down perfectly to where the

22:48

projectile will go through the passenger

22:51

driver side door of of the

22:53

Humvees. And basically would vaporize

22:56

everything in the vehicle and you just get

22:58

sucked out of a little hole on

23:00

the back end. And

23:03

so that was that

23:05

was chewing a lot of our guys

23:07

up. And we just

23:09

got tired of seeing these conventional guys

23:11

just get crushed by these.

23:15

And so, so we

23:17

started attaching ourselves to these conventional units

23:19

that didn't have the knowledge or know

23:21

how on how to kind of combat

23:23

this set up a targeting package to

23:26

get these guys. And so what we would do

23:28

is we would, we would get

23:30

him with him in bed with him, train him for a couple

23:32

of weeks, bring him out,

23:35

teach him how to set up sniper hides, teach

23:37

him how to do a targeting package, teach

23:39

him how to conduct surveillance. Teach

23:42

him how to start running assets

23:44

within the local population to

23:47

try to figure out who's doing this and

23:49

teach him how to shoot everything. Gave

23:54

him a lot of stuff. We really kind of

23:56

like took these guys under our wings and

23:59

then we would take them out. on operations and

24:01

so we will go out

24:04

find all the places they were getting hit and set

24:07

up sniper teams along

24:10

all of those different routes all those points

24:13

of interest and we would take

24:16

each sniper observation team would

24:18

take maybe one or two

24:20

conventional guys with them

24:22

on the actual operation and

24:26

then we started telling bad guys mm-hmm

24:29

certain things the other way you

24:32

must have lost a lot of friends every

24:34

guy who serves does and you're one of the

24:36

lucky ones if nothing happens to you to

24:39

take a limb or a traumatic brain injury

24:44

as you're going through it there's no time to deal with any

24:46

of that right it's just forward like

24:48

we talked about in the training just forward there's

24:50

no time to think about that stuff but

24:52

you're you're in active combat

24:55

situations and Iraq and Afghanistan and

24:57

eventually that stops right and

25:00

is it at that point that

25:02

you have to deal with that or is

25:04

it later because I know then comes to

25:06

CIA stint it's

25:10

it's a gradual it just

25:14

comes on gradual and

25:16

I mean there's a

25:18

lot of there's a lot of coping mechanisms

25:22

that we use and

25:24

that numbs it out booze

25:27

pills sleeping pills

25:29

whatever you can kind of do

25:31

to numb it out and

25:34

you know in the early days nobody knew

25:36

any any better you know that

25:40

kind of all came crashing down later on for

25:42

a lot of guys and that's what we cover

25:45

on my show but it took

25:50

it took a while you know for that

25:52

stuff to start sinking in probably well into

25:56

my contracting career at the agency

26:00

Well, that's the thing if when you

26:02

have massive crises, especially repeated and ongoing

26:04

sustained crises, there's only one

26:06

way like you have to compartmentalize how

26:08

could you possibly function? Yeah. If you

26:11

were dealing with any of it. You're

26:13

not you actually are human

26:15

despite all appearances of our seals and

26:17

our Rangers and all those guys. So

26:20

was it right after your service interact that you

26:23

decided to join the agency? No,

26:25

honestly, I didn't want to. I never

26:27

wanted to go back and

26:29

I wanted to pursue

26:31

some type of a career in business. And

26:34

so I tried a lot of

26:36

things civilian life. I just I

26:39

wasn't ready for it yet. And

26:41

I decided that

26:43

I'd missed the. Brotherhood

26:46

the camaraderie the the

26:49

obnoxiousness of being on a

26:51

team. And so I decided

26:54

I would try to get into a fire

26:56

academy and and I did.

27:00

Wasn't it wasn't what it

27:02

was a fire academy. It's a firefighter. Okay.

27:04

Yeah. I wanted to be I just thought,

27:07

well, that seems like the next best thing

27:09

to what I was a part of. And

27:12

it just wasn't going to work for me.

27:14

A lot of family ties help

27:17

and the fire service and I had none. So

27:20

I had a friend and that

27:22

was in Afghanistan with me another

27:25

seal. And he said, hey, I'm

27:27

working for black water. And

27:32

I think you should come work with us. And I

27:34

had seen a lot of the black water contractors and

27:36

heard a lot of the stuff that was going on

27:38

over there at the time. Some of it was true.

27:40

Some of it wound up not being true. But

27:43

I decided while I

27:45

was over there and I saw how those guys operated,

27:48

I didn't want to be a part of the contracting

27:50

career and especially

27:52

a black water. And so

27:54

I'd expressed that to him and he

27:56

said, this is different. This

27:59

is a different. Project the

28:01

qualifications all

28:03

have to be at least

28:06

six years and special operations are above.

28:09

Then there's a month long tryout. I

28:12

can't tell you who I'm working for, but

28:14

I think you would really fit in

28:16

well here. And it's it's it's not

28:18

what you're thinking. It's very

28:20

high caliber operators

28:22

working here. So. So,

28:25

I threw my name in the hat and took

28:27

about six months to get a call back and

28:31

then I did and it was just a email that

28:33

said, hey, be here at this time. Bring this year

28:36

with you. And

28:39

it was a betting course. So,

28:42

that was for Blackwater. So, I don't

28:45

know how familiar with Blackwater,

28:48

but Blackwater is a massive

28:50

organization. Right. And they

28:52

have so under Blackwater, they have all

28:54

these different contracts. They have the department

28:57

state contract. They have the D.

28:59

A contract. They have probably

29:03

all kinds of government contracts. And

29:05

then the very back of the compound,

29:07

which Blackwater compound was, I

29:09

don't know how many thousands of acres is

29:12

the black. The black sites

29:15

and so you go back

29:17

there. They don't tell

29:19

you anything and you're

29:22

with with a group of guys and

29:24

you start off with a test and

29:26

then you do some shooting qualifications.

29:28

They don't really tell you what

29:31

the standards are. They're just, it's just, just

29:34

here's the time. Do

29:36

your best and or sometimes

29:39

when they won't even give you the

29:41

time, just hit that

29:43

target as many times as you can and as

29:46

fast as possible. And

29:48

so you do that and

29:50

it's, you know, it's really, it's. You

29:54

don't know the standard and that's the

29:57

biggest stressor is right. There's nobody. It's

29:59

not succeeding. Yeah, you don't, you have

30:01

no idea and you don't even know if you

30:03

passed at the end of the day or not.

30:06

And so it's just, I

30:09

mean, you, you know, you passed if

30:12

you're showing up the next day to work to try out. And

30:15

so we had made it through the shooting

30:18

qualifications and then you go through a lot

30:20

of kind of situational stuff. They'll put you

30:22

in these, in these situations. And they

30:25

wanted to see how you react, how you

30:27

can lead a team, how you can integrate

30:29

him with a team, all

30:32

kinds of different scenarios scenarios that you're never going to

30:35

fight your way out of lots of civilians.

30:37

They would plant lots

30:39

of like role

30:41

players with simulation rounds, which is

30:43

basically kind of like a paintball gun, but more

30:46

realistic. And it

30:50

will put you in all these scenarios to see if you can

30:52

keep your cool under pressure,

30:54

not shooting any innocent civilians.

30:57

It was

31:00

a protection type gig as well. So a lot of

31:02

times they would have like some type of an asset

31:04

that you're, you have to go in and extract. And

31:06

I made it through that. And then at the very

31:09

end, they, there was also

31:11

driving, you know, all

31:14

kinds of stuff that they wanted to just kind

31:16

of see how you were in all these different

31:18

scenarios. And

31:21

at the end, they, they, they give

31:23

you the brief and say, hey, you know, this is

31:25

the OGA, other government agencies, CIA contract. And

31:29

they started looking for dates to go overseas.

31:32

Yes, but you don't know for what? No,

31:34

you never know. You just know that you've been

31:37

selected as this elite kind of. Yeah.

31:40

Service member and whatever it is, it's going

31:42

to be very high level and complicated and

31:45

complex, right? So you're

31:47

in, but you don't know what you're in for. Yeah.

31:50

Well, that's disconcerting. Just listening to you, you

31:52

are cool. You are calm. Like

31:54

that, that probably would be a good idea.

32:00

really helped you. I mean, I was just thinking,

32:03

who do I know who's kind of more on the

32:05

hysterical end? I don't know her, but she's the only

32:07

one who came to mind. Somebody like a Bethany Frankel,

32:09

the former Real Housewife. I know that's a

32:11

bizarre compare, but I mean, she's tightly wound,

32:13

Sean. She's like, oh, he's like, everything is

32:15

up here, right? And you're just the opposite.

32:18

I just kind of a cool cat, like

32:20

a little blood pressure kind of guy. Well, I

32:22

mean, when you're in a job like that,

32:24

and I'm sure you can relate being on

32:26

TV and the career that you've

32:29

had, but I mean, it's so it is, it

32:31

gets to be so high stress. Every

32:34

day you're being judged, you're

32:36

being graded. It's the

32:39

habit it takes to be a part of this team,

32:41

you know, from the suit from from SEAL training through

32:43

the, through the teams, the six

32:45

years that I was there to CIA,

32:48

or Blackwater training for the

32:51

subcontractor of CIA contractor. I

32:53

mean, it's just, you have to get

32:55

to the point where you can, you

32:57

know, blow that stuff off and, and

33:00

that that came to me in

33:02

the teams, it, I was

33:05

constantly just, it

33:07

was just stress all the time. Do I deserve

33:09

to be here? Am I going to get kicked

33:11

out this week? You know, what

33:13

does my team think of me? I'm a new guy.

33:15

And you have to in that stuff

33:18

can hinder your performance. And

33:20

so, you know,

33:22

the most, the most stressful thing

33:24

you can do, at least for me as

33:26

an operator is when you're doing the kill

33:28

house, which is, which is

33:30

entering buildings, saving hostages,

33:33

killing bad guys all in your face,

33:36

clearing houses, basically. And

33:38

we're talking about real life now or the training? We're

33:40

talking about training and real life. Okay. But, but

33:43

primarily, I guess primarily training. And

33:46

it gets to the point where

33:48

if you let this stuff get to you, every,

33:50

every house, we call them a house from where

33:52

you go through the doors, maybe you blow the

33:54

doors, maybe you're climbing in a

33:56

window, maybe you're coming in from the rooftop, doesn't matter.

33:59

But once you enter that house and

34:01

training, every

34:04

move you make is critiqued.

34:08

And it can make it seem like

34:10

in purposely that they're picking on you,

34:12

that you're not any good, that

34:14

they don't want you there. And

34:17

you just have to get to the point where you

34:20

can't let that stuff affect you. It just got to

34:22

the point in the teams where I had

34:26

hit this mental switch where I

34:30

don't care anymore. I had tricked

34:33

myself into thinking, I don't

34:35

care how this house run ends. I

34:38

don't care what these guys think of me.

34:40

I'm just going to do the best I can do. And

34:42

that's all I can do. Do you know the free

34:44

solo movie and the story about that mountain

34:47

climber who refused to use any

34:49

lines and supports and he wound up dying?

34:52

But they talk about these guys who climb

34:54

these mountains and they're nuts. They do it

34:56

with no support. You know, there's nothing to,

34:58

you know, and a lot of them do die. But

35:02

they identify with a lot

35:04

of these guys that they've lost their ability to get

35:06

an adrenaline surge. And that's actually one

35:09

of the reasons why they do it the way they do it without

35:11

all the belts and suspenders. Can

35:15

you relate to that at all? Oh yeah. You,

35:17

you lose. Adrenaline. Yeah. And then

35:19

maybe crossing over to it's gone. Like, where is

35:21

it? How can I get it again? Yeah.

35:25

You find it through, I mean,

35:28

that's why so many guys honestly wind

35:30

back up in the, in the contracting

35:32

arena is especially like these guys, you

35:34

know, that, that spend 30 plus years

35:37

at the

35:39

seal teams or a

35:41

SF team or Delta or wherever

35:43

Rangers. Marsok. You

35:47

can't, it, it, it's never enough. I

35:49

mean, it's like, it's like

35:52

a heroin addiction. You know, you're constantly looking

35:54

for the fix and then it gets so

35:56

bad that, that even

35:58

on your off time, you know, looking for

36:00

it. It's not, you can't

36:02

take six months and not feel that. It

36:05

is, it's the

36:08

pinnacle of your existence at the time.

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37:11

guys, Conan O'Brien here to tell you about some

37:13

of the stranger things we've been doing recently on

37:15

my podcast, Conan O'Brien Needs a Friend. Recently

37:18

we had an episode where I sat

37:21

down with some

37:23

of the writers that I worked with on

37:25

Conan O'Brien Must Go, that's my travel show

37:27

on Max, and we talked about

37:29

everything that goes into those shows and

37:33

a lot of very insane anecdotes

37:35

from our travels and adventures. There's

37:38

another episode you might want to check

37:40

out where I discuss with

37:43

my physician, Dr. Arroyo, about

37:45

my experience on hot ones. We talk about

37:48

my near-death experience and

37:50

his complete inability to

37:53

help me because he may or may not be a

37:55

real doctor. That's just some of

37:57

the stuff that's been going on and if you

37:59

feel up to it... check it out. So catch up on all

38:01

things I've been up to on Conan O'Brien Needs a

38:03

Friend wherever you get your podcasts. I

38:10

can't imagine, you know, just the other night

38:12

I was at a dinner party at a

38:14

friend's house in Connecticut. It was absolutely lovely.

38:17

Hostess knew all the right things to do. We

38:19

had a lovely cocktail hour. We sat down for dinner. There

38:22

was even some dancing after the fact, which is a

38:24

successful cocktail party at a dinner party by any measure.

38:27

I can't imagine a Sean Ryan

38:31

having lived the life you've lived, right?

38:33

Coming back from all of that and

38:35

even participating as such. I mean, I just

38:37

feel like your whole life must

38:40

have been, you know, when this was

38:42

done, like, what is this?

38:45

Who are these people? What is this? This

38:48

is just absolute dribble around me everywhere. None

38:51

of this matters. Did you

38:53

go through that? Oh, yeah. It created a

38:55

lot of anxiety, a lot of anxiety.

38:58

I had really bad social anxiety

39:00

when I left the agency. And

39:03

I just, I

39:06

mean, you are thrown

39:08

into a world that

39:11

you thought you knew. And

39:17

it's just, it's hard. I

39:19

mean, it's really hard to

39:22

relate to anybody who has

39:24

not lived the kind of life that you've lived.

39:26

It takes a long time, you know, and it

39:28

takes a lot of self-work. It's

39:31

like you were on Mars for 14 years. Pretty much. Yeah, that's

39:33

a good way to put it. Right? And

39:36

you come back, Earth has changed a lot. Now

39:39

there's an internet, GPS, and iPhones and social

39:41

media. So it's like the dramatic changes. And

39:44

a lot of different opinions on what we're doing over

39:46

there. So can you help me

39:48

understand, because we talked about leaving the

39:50

seals and going to Blackwater. And then,

39:52

but that, and that, do

39:55

you count that as CIA time? I don't totally understand. Yeah.

39:57

So, so, so I spent a very

39:59

brief time. of Blackwater as well. So I

40:02

did two deployments, I think,

40:04

with Blackwater. And, but you're under,

40:09

so basically, if you're going

40:11

to get your housework done, right, you're going

40:13

to use a general contractor, and then he's

40:15

going to subcontract out the plumbing, the

40:18

drywall, the air conditioning. So

40:20

think of like, think

40:22

of Blackwater as the general contractor

40:25

for the US government. And

40:27

so then Department of State is says,

40:29

hey, we need 500 guys to, in

40:32

Baghdad to protect

40:36

all of our state diplomats.

40:39

Okay, so Blackwater goes and they, what do you, what

40:41

kind of guys do you want? What do you want

40:43

to pay? You know, what qualifications

40:45

are you looking for? And then

40:47

they go find those type of people, train

40:49

them up, put them through a vetting course,

40:51

and then here's your 500 guys. And so

40:53

CIA does the same thing. It's hey, we

40:55

need, we have this very particular set

40:58

of skills we're looking for. This is the job

41:01

description. You guys, you

41:03

Blackwater go find these guys for

41:06

us. So we're basically subcontractors for

41:08

the agency. Okay. Does that make sense? Yeah. Why?

41:11

I don't understand Blackwater that well, but why

41:14

would they not just go tap the

41:16

seals or, you know, the green berets or

41:19

why would they go to to Blackwater for

41:21

any of this? That's a great

41:23

question. I wish I could answer that. And they

41:26

they do go direct. And so later on

41:28

in my career after Blackwater, I wanted to,

41:30

they, I had taken a break from Blackwater.

41:32

Then I went to a company

41:35

called SOC, did

41:37

a couple of appointments with them, got

41:39

kind of tired of the agency stuff for a

41:41

little bit. So then I jumped on an anti-piracy

41:43

gig back, you

41:46

remember the Marisk, Alabama? Yeah. So

41:48

after that happened, all

41:50

these contracts spun up and it was, all

41:53

right, we need, we need seals on

41:55

ships to kill pirates that are trying

41:57

to, you know, kidnap the crew. and

42:00

take over the ship. Just another day at work.

42:02

Yeah, and ran some. No, that's like Rob O'Neill. I

42:04

told him he's like the Waldo of, you know, service centers.

42:07

He's everywhere. Yeah. I

42:09

mean, movie that's ever been made, Rob O'Neill had a role

42:11

in it. He's been on all of the ops, right? But

42:13

yeah. But so I

42:15

did that for two deployments, and

42:18

then the agency got back in touch with me,

42:20

and then they wanted me to come work direct

42:22

for him as a

42:24

contractor, but not through any companies.

42:27

Okay. And so- Yeah.

42:30

So that's good. Yeah. I

42:32

mean, more so than he ever got paid by the Navy. Yeah,

42:34

way more than I got paid for by the Navy. Can

42:36

you get rich doing that, or not really? I

42:39

mean, I guess it depends on how

42:41

you invest your money. I mean, at that time,

42:43

a good rate was about $1,000 a day.

42:48

So that would be a really, that would be a good rate.

42:52

Some guys, a low rate would be about $550 a day. And

42:57

so yeah, I mean,

42:59

it depends on how much you want to deploy. Where

43:01

are you sitting in between deployments?

43:04

Are you back here, like going

43:06

to the movies and Starbucks?

43:09

I spent

43:11

a lot of time, well, I

43:13

mean, it was 14, agency

43:16

was about a little shy of nine years. And

43:19

so I

43:22

would, man, I would go all over, but

43:26

towards the end, I started going to Columbia,

43:29

South America a lot. This is not a good period

43:31

in your life. You know about

43:33

this. Nothing good happens in Columbia. No,

43:36

nothing good does happen in Columbia. No,

43:38

I do know a little bit about your troubles. And

43:42

that was a rough period for you. Explain why

43:44

and why Columbia. Originally,

43:47

I went to Columbia because when

43:50

I joined the SEAL teams, I had always

43:52

wanted to go to team four because I

43:54

wanted to do the counter drug ops. Well

43:57

then, you know, 9-11 kicked off,

43:59

obviously. And that wasn't a

44:01

focus at all. And so

44:05

when I was in the agency, I had broken up

44:07

with a girlfriend. And so I

44:09

decided I wanted to travel and I'd always,

44:12

I was just in fact, I

44:14

mean, those were all the documentaries I was watching when I

44:16

went to the recruiter. It was, that

44:18

was the only thing going on at

44:20

the time was Panama and kind of

44:22

the, the counterdrug situation down in South

44:24

America, when a lot

44:26

of that was in Columbia. Since

44:29

documented in shows like Narcos. Yeah.

44:31

Yeah. And, and,

44:33

uh, so I decided I wanted to go check it

44:35

out down there. And, um, so

44:38

I, I mean, that's crazy talk

44:40

just after, just like as a pin in

44:42

this car, that's crazy talk, nobody looks at

44:44

a show like Narcos or Panama and says,

44:46

yes, I want to go there. That's

44:49

all normal people are

44:51

like, thank God that's down there. Yeah. Well,

44:54

I mean, I went, it was for a number. I wanted to

44:56

see, I just, I wanted

44:58

to be in a jungle environment.

45:01

And, uh, so I went to check it out, had

45:04

a, a great time. And,

45:06

uh, and so I kept,

45:08

I just kept going back, kept going back,

45:10

kept going back all the way past my

45:12

time at the agency. But, uh,

45:15

then it turned into,

45:17

we had just kind of spoken

45:19

about addiction to adrenaline. And so

45:21

I was going

45:24

down there doing a lot

45:26

of stuff that I shouldn't be doing. Cocaine. And,

45:30

and, and then

45:32

once I left, uh, the

45:34

agency, I kind of started building a

45:36

network down there. And,

45:38

um, it just, it

45:40

was exciting to me. I was in overseas

45:45

building my own network, kind

45:48

of felt like I was kind of

45:50

running my own operations. What kind of

45:52

operations, uh, drug networks.

45:55

And so I wanted to see how

45:57

deep into the kind of. Nor.

46:00

Goes Network I could get myself.

46:03

And this is not for crime

46:06

fighting. Now. This. Was

46:08

for crime committee. Pretty. Much

46:10

here and I'm. So

46:14

I kind of started at street level

46:16

and built a network out and want

46:18

to clubs and that people and and.

46:20

And. Bow.

46:22

My guys and started. Testing

46:25

cocaine and find in the best Us

46:27

than and. And I found

46:29

it. And now I'm and that

46:31

lasted for. For. A couple years

46:33

and I would down. I would just bounce. I.

46:36

Mean, it was really. I got

46:38

a lot of satisfaction out of

46:40

the adrenaline N C and. And.

46:43

You see, and how much I could have

46:45

been mice and bed myself into these different

46:47

cultures and so then I started flying all

46:49

over. All. Over South America I

46:52

started going to Peru. And.

46:55

Starting. To build network there and

46:57

Dominican Republic and Panama. All.

47:00

Over Columbia of. All

47:02

over the country and.

47:05

Costa Rica and then I started looking up the

47:07

most dangerous places you go on the world

47:09

and at the time it was. San.

47:11

Pedro Sula Honduras so I

47:13

want their and started ah

47:16

didn't get very far there

47:18

but job but damn. That.

47:21

Was that was my life

47:23

for several years. Mile in

47:25

the the first was cocaine and you

47:27

would find what like would be dealers

47:29

people. To. Distribute it. I would find dealership

47:32

and then I would find. Their

47:34

dealers and then I would find where

47:36

their dealers get their stuff and and.

47:38

I got to. A. Pretty high

47:40

level. Directly went killed. It is

47:43

a miracle it was. I

47:45

mean, I was, and it is what I do

47:47

for a living now you know. And so that's

47:49

true. You had some pretty superior training I was.

47:51

I was pretty good at it and. Pretty.

47:54

Fearless at the time. So

47:56

when you're talking to year. old

47:58

navy seal buds or Blackwater

48:00

Buds and you're down there and

48:03

they're saying, what are you up to? What

48:05

were you saying? I would just tell them. I've

48:08

crossed over to the other side. I wouldn't

48:10

tell them exactly what I'm doing, but I

48:12

would, I mean, they knew, everybody kind of

48:14

knew. You know, I mean,

48:16

it just, I

48:18

started losing friends. I

48:21

know the conversations were like, oh yeah,

48:23

I mean, he's down in Columbia and

48:25

nobody really hears from him anymore. And

48:28

I would resurface every once in a while.

48:30

Sometimes guys would come down to see me.

48:32

They wouldn't last very long. They'd head back

48:34

out immediately. And

48:38

it just, it got to be

48:40

very dark. And,

48:43

you know, I OD'd down

48:45

there a couple of

48:47

times and

48:52

I remember one time,

48:54

I was in the hospital I

48:58

woke up and it was

49:00

like, it was Mother's Day.

49:07

And I remember

49:10

calling my mom and I was all junked out. And

49:16

I remember after that

49:18

conversation that it just hit

49:20

me like a ton of bricks.

49:22

And I

49:25

knew I needed to pull myself out of that. And

49:27

it kind of like went right back

49:29

to the time when, you know, I

49:31

told you the only reason I made it through BUDZ was I

49:34

didn't want to let my parents down. And I sure

49:37

as hell didn't want my parents

49:39

to get a notice weeks later

49:41

that their son had OD'd on

49:43

cocaine and a penthouse in Columbia.

49:46

And who knows how long

49:48

that would take to even get to them. And so

49:50

it had painted this picture in

49:52

my head. And

49:54

I started seeking help kind of. A

50:00

big moment. We're. Before.

50:04

You begin. That pass to. Redemption.

50:07

Me: Or. What

50:09

got you there? What made you.

50:12

Establish. Residency in Colombia and go

50:14

all over these countries isn't the

50:16

most dangerous countries on earth. To

50:19

mess with other people's drug rings? My god,

50:21

right it. like playing with plutonium for a

50:23

living here. And

50:25

be so reckless. With.

50:27

Your life and your well being. Ah,

50:31

you know I just. I

50:33

just didn't value life anymore. I.

50:36

Didn't I didn't care? I mean, I

50:38

did. I'd have expected to. I'd.

50:40

Expected to die down there. And.

50:43

Hour. And then when

50:45

I got close, ah, I realized. There's

50:49

a lot more to life than us,

50:51

and so so I cleaned it up

50:53

and are truth be told, I mean

50:55

that was kind of in awakening, but

50:57

I wasn't a hundred percent ready to

50:59

shut it down and then. I

51:02

heard in I'd built quite the network

51:04

down there. And I

51:06

got tipped off that the

51:08

Federal police and columbia worse

51:10

surveilling. Me,

51:13

Erica, and people that I was

51:15

worth. And I'm so

51:17

I said. I.

51:20

Eat And Eat. Out of the Country. With.

51:22

Any Avenger I just I

51:24

have brought the last and

51:26

up I did. kind

51:29

of a with home and str but

51:31

our surveillance direction route and i want

51:33

to see if they were severely me

51:35

if i was walking around town. And.

51:39

So I got rid of everything,

51:42

clean everything up, and. Went

51:45

to an internet cafe, buff myself

51:47

some tickets to a couple different

51:49

places. Jumped on one end and

51:52

up. And. Left

51:54

the country are actually like the or. Do

51:56

we extradite to Columbia? A

51:59

subject. asking for a friend.

52:02

Yeah, yeah. But,

52:04

but yeah, no, I got out of there and

52:09

went home, home to Missouri, talked

52:12

to my parents. They knew some... You

52:14

told them? You told them everything? Yeah, I don't

52:16

remember telling them anything. And woke

52:19

up the next day after telling

52:21

them with a hangover and my dad was...

52:24

I could

52:26

just tell by the look on his face that

52:30

I must have spilled probably

52:32

just about everything. What did the look

52:34

say? Very concerned

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53:56

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charge of the little pie. See website for additional details. I

55:09

didn't take it seriously. I didn't think

55:11

I needed any help and I

55:13

just kept at it. What do

55:16

you mean kept at what? I kept at I

55:18

wouldn't put the bottle down. Wasn't

55:20

ready to do that. I don't think I could have

55:22

done that and then you know through the career I

55:24

mean you just

55:26

you know I had mentioned you know numbing

55:29

it out and numbing

55:32

it out becomes it's not even

55:34

a cycle it's just this it's

55:36

just pills after pills. It's a way

55:39

of life. You know it's volumes, annex,

55:41

lorazepan, ambient, hydrocodine,

55:44

oxy, pteramidol, what kind of

55:46

whatever you can just wash

55:48

down to shut the brain

55:50

down and get some rest. And

55:53

so I wasn't doing that. I

55:56

Wasn't ready to clean that up. I had kind

55:58

of. Weaned. Myself

56:00

off the off the coke and

56:03

now I'm. And.

56:06

Then. The.

56:09

Things you swore get better. My life

56:11

wasn't developing afterwards and so. I.

56:14

Started. Going. To therapy. And.

56:17

Our and our which was talk therapy

56:19

to yeah I was starting on to

56:21

talk therapy is extremely has done I

56:23

was or I thought well I need

56:25

to go to somebody I have to

56:27

go to somebody that's experience what I've

56:29

experienced. I need like a Vietnam vet.

56:32

Or. Or somebody

56:34

that. Has seen action.

56:37

And our. I.

56:39

Couldn't find anybody and I'm

56:41

so I just googled I

56:43

just googled therapist talked to

56:45

two or three of on.

56:48

And walked in the one

56:50

ah which was very it

56:52

was ah. Interesting.

56:54

Because this was kind of

56:56

before before anybody really know

56:59

about the suicide epidemic before.

57:01

Ptsd. And dramatic brain injury,

57:03

an operator syndrome or whatever they're called

57:05

on this week. I'm. Gonna. Start

57:08

a good now there and.

57:13

Man. Elazar. It took me a while to warm

57:15

up through it was. I love

57:17

it. Male or female. Female. Nice.

57:21

Yeah. I love Athena Therapist Mine currently as

57:23

mail but there was a woman who I googled

57:25

ah when I was leaving. My first has been

57:27

before There was doubt there was Dance With You.

57:29

I'm still friends but we did get a divorce.

57:32

And that same thing. I googled this woman

57:34

and she totally changed my life. He never

57:37

know me he can. He. Can

57:39

strike gold the up and then they're

57:41

yellow pages or google pages. As

57:43

it is now and I can relate

57:45

to. Doing that and

57:47

having it be a life changer.

57:50

Beer it.! Good for

57:52

you. I'm happy for him. Thank you! I'm.

57:54

So yeah, Interesting enough, she had

57:56

never talked, ever talk to a

57:58

combat that. And.

58:02

Wound. Up a d my

58:04

own research and now wound

58:06

up being a a pretty

58:08

staunch liberal. Ah, which

58:10

I probably wouldn't have gone to her. See you

58:12

are more conservative going and I know you leave

58:14

right now but. Back. You

58:16

to the Us against? Definitely. Probably.

58:19

More so, but dumb. But

58:21

I gotta be honest, you

58:23

know that woman is. Like.

58:26

An angel and. I

58:28

don't. I don't care what

58:30

her political beliefs are. That.

58:32

Woman has saved more

58:35

Special Ops guys are.

58:39

From. Suicide and anybody. Anybody.

58:42

Than. Anybody saved in combat and anybody

58:45

I know and dark. And.

58:47

Ah, she can, she still does it

58:49

to this day, and that was back

58:52

in probably twenty twenty sustained twenty six

58:54

team time frame and. Who.

58:56

Was. It. Was me

58:58

and when I when I left the exit

59:01

was also. Are. Trying to save

59:03

my best friends live who added a terrible

59:05

heroin addiction and I talk to him and

59:07

to go on and to is to to

59:10

meet. And. And

59:12

then I just started telling everybody. And. I

59:14

remember my best friend's name was gave

59:17

em. We gave her a. A

59:20

R. A Seal Team plaque just

59:22

to say thank you. And

59:26

Dark as you was helping us

59:28

out with. she had debris prices

59:30

down and. And Out

59:32

Disturb. An

59:34

amazing woman. And. Now you

59:37

go in there and. Her.

59:39

Entire. Offices just.

59:41

Plaque. After plaque after pretty soon you

59:43

go see a Trump's banners you get anywhere

59:46

the mega have. Yeah

59:49

about it or they'll be aside

59:51

to say but I'm but dumb.

59:54

But. I mean it. It. it. You know,

59:56

The reason I say that is because there are

59:58

some things that can that. and

1:00:01

political agendas don't get

1:00:04

in the way. And you

1:00:06

don't see that very often these days.

1:00:08

And I think that's important. I

1:00:10

love that you said that. I feel the same. I have

1:00:12

very strong political views on a number

1:00:14

of issues, but pretty much

1:00:17

80% of the people around

1:00:19

me who I love in my life, the

1:00:21

woman who raised me, all my best friends, my

1:00:24

best friends growing up, are liberal.

1:00:26

They're not woke, but they're

1:00:29

liberal. They're Democrats. So I

1:00:31

have tons of love in my heart for all

1:00:33

of them, even though they don't vote the way

1:00:35

I vote, and they don't feel the way I

1:00:37

do about the issues that are really important to

1:00:39

me, but I don't care. Those don't

1:00:41

have to be the stakes of the relationship. Yeah. Takes

1:00:45

a strong person to overcome that these days,

1:00:48

but they're out there. Yeah.

1:00:51

Do you say her name or at least her first name? Her

1:00:54

first name's Amy. My lady was

1:00:56

named Amy. Really? What is

1:00:58

this, Missouri? Well,

1:01:00

no, no, that's South

1:01:03

Florida. Okay. My

1:01:05

lady was in the Virginia area, Northern Virginia.

1:01:07

Interesting. Well, I'll talk after. All

1:01:10

right. The specifics. Same thing.

1:01:14

When you were telling me that story, it reminded me. So

1:01:17

we have military guys on all the

1:01:19

times. I just honestly respect the

1:01:21

hell out of you guys and what you do. And

1:01:23

as I said, would

1:01:25

love to raise two little soldiers, but don't

1:01:27

really want to for the reasons discussed.

1:01:30

And we interviewed

1:01:32

Dakota Meyer. Oh. And

1:01:34

of course his story is just, it's incredible.

1:01:36

Medal of Honor. Talked about how he was

1:01:38

drunk up there when President Bush is pinning

1:01:40

the medal on him and or with Obama.

1:01:43

And he talks

1:01:45

very openly about how difficult it was

1:01:48

for him to come back and

1:01:50

miss the guys and miss the adrenaline and

1:01:52

just dealing with the trauma of everything he'd

1:01:55

seen and done. And

1:01:57

he talked about his

1:01:59

own. moment of super

1:02:02

low and being

1:02:04

rescued by an angel. And

1:02:06

we pulled the sound bite. So take a watch.

1:02:10

I felt like where I was at in life at that

1:02:12

point that you know, that

1:02:16

I just couldn't get my stuff together and and

1:02:19

and I just I, I should

1:02:21

fix it, right? Like the fear I could

1:02:23

see in people's eyes, you know, with me

1:02:25

like I was a monster. It's just like

1:02:27

drinking and just, you know, you know,

1:02:30

the thing is, is that people don't talk about

1:02:32

this much. You know, you

1:02:36

don't fight evil with

1:02:38

nice people. And I just I

1:02:40

remember driving home. And I pulled off

1:02:43

this highway. And my

1:02:45

buddy shop, because I knew you know, I didn't

1:02:48

want anybody worried about me, right? So I pulled

1:02:51

in and I knew that he would be in because he comes in to

1:02:53

work every morning. And

1:02:55

I just, yeah, I mean, I was I was gonna do

1:02:57

it right there. I stuck it to my head and I

1:02:59

squeeze the trigger and it just like it went click and

1:03:02

there was no round in it. And I don't know if

1:03:05

you know, I feel like I know who did it. I

1:03:07

don't I don't I don't truly know though. But

1:03:11

he said he does believe he knows a friend

1:03:14

had removed the bullets from the gun. Wow.

1:03:17

He thinks it was a friend. Yeah. Does he

1:03:20

know who it was? He said he thinks he does. But

1:03:24

that's an angel. That's a real

1:03:26

life God's angel on this

1:03:28

earth. Yeah, looking out for

1:03:30

him. You know, she saved him.

1:03:33

And I believe, you know, Amy may

1:03:35

have saved you and maybe my Amy

1:03:37

saved me. It's like, yes,

1:03:40

you kind of have to be a willing participant. But I

1:03:43

know you found faith. And I I'm also a

1:03:45

person of faith. And I do think like, if

1:03:48

you're just open eyed, you

1:03:50

can see these angels like often

1:03:52

all around us. Yeah, they

1:03:54

look like mere mortals. But

1:03:57

they were sent here for a purpose that

1:03:59

that your therapy. goes home at night

1:04:02

and when she looks back at her day

1:04:04

to say what did I do today that really

1:04:06

mattered my god yeah does anybody have a

1:04:08

better roster probably

1:04:10

not probably

1:04:12

not she's amazing now you're

1:04:14

doing it I mean that's kind of how

1:04:16

you make your living now just talking to

1:04:18

guys who probably aren't that used

1:04:21

to talking about this stuff in

1:04:23

like a safe place right somebody who gets it

1:04:26

mm-hmm it's kind of a form of talk therapy

1:04:28

just to sort of be able to

1:04:30

speak about it at least it's a step well

1:04:33

it is and you know I

1:04:35

think you know my podcast

1:04:38

is done well and well

1:04:40

you're being humble and but

1:04:43

I give I give Amy a lot

1:04:45

of credit to how I

1:04:47

interview because I realized yeah I

1:04:50

realized in therapy and

1:04:53

she really didn't say a whole lot

1:04:55

and a lot of times you just

1:04:57

start figuring things out yourself by just

1:04:59

getting it out and and

1:05:03

and so I realized you know and

1:05:05

I realized that if you

1:05:08

just let somebody talk them

1:05:10

so they're just gonna keep

1:05:12

going nine times out of ten and

1:05:15

and yeah so

1:05:18

so being in therapy twice a week for

1:05:20

three and a half years really helped me

1:05:22

as an interviewer yeah right as an

1:05:25

interviewer to write this to let people talk

1:05:27

and to listen yeah to listen it's helpful too

1:05:29

as opposed to be thinking about your next question so

1:05:32

when did you find love because

1:05:34

that seems relatively recent

1:05:36

right you got engaged you got married now you

1:05:39

have two kids and including a new daughter

1:05:41

congrats thank you thank you so what

1:05:43

did you find your wife your future wife

1:05:46

during all of the Amy time or when yep

1:05:49

right in the middle of it I had a I met

1:05:53

my wife on a gun range at

1:05:55

a nice love than Florida it's amazing

1:05:57

I know right and My

1:06:00

my best friend still

1:06:03

to this day David Rutherford Had

1:06:06

a new sniper rifle that he wanted to sight

1:06:08

in and he

1:06:11

knew He knew somebody

1:06:13

that had access to a thousand yard

1:06:15

range and so we went out there her

1:06:18

dad met us and my wife's name

1:06:20

is Katie she jumped out of the truck and And

1:06:24

that was that was that we we

1:06:27

we shot some guns We

1:06:29

went to the The club

1:06:31

restaurant. She gave me some tots and

1:06:34

that was that was there. What's tots tater

1:06:36

tots? Big

1:06:39

fan help me to Also

1:06:42

because I haven't had a french fry in

1:06:44

three years what yes, it was a personal

1:06:46

mission I'm basically a Navy SEAL to in

1:06:48

my strength and my ability to say no

1:06:51

to the The

1:06:53

things that are bad for me. No, I

1:06:55

decided in June of 2021

1:06:58

they were becoming a problem for me And

1:07:02

then I need to swear off and so I decided to go a year and

1:07:05

now I'm I'm almost three years clean

1:07:07

well congratulations But the tot

1:07:10

is the back door to the fried

1:07:12

potato And

1:07:14

I may not pass like a drug test

1:07:16

of But

1:07:21

it's not even called the same thing it's called

1:07:23

tater tot It's not a fresh right anyway big

1:07:25

fan because they they allow me to still have

1:07:27

my they're amazing But I'm not as

1:07:29

addicted as the French fry. They don't have the same

1:07:31

down the rabbit hole quality for me Yeah,

1:07:34

you know french fries are it's like

1:07:36

you conveyor belt for ketchup. Yes

1:07:39

Totally agree. The only purpose of the

1:07:41

tot is to deliver the ketchup Right,

1:07:45

I know and then somebody will violate

1:07:47

the whole foods ketchup and you're like,

1:07:49

you know, what is this roads the

1:07:51

entire meal, right? You need the

1:07:53

sugar the preservatives whatever

1:07:56

Heinz does. That's what

1:07:58

we need. That's right. That's right. All right So

1:08:00

I never realized it could be an

1:08:02

aphrodisiac, but I like how Katie rolls.

1:08:05

So she lures you in with the tots and

1:08:07

the guns and you were like, I'm home.

1:08:10

When am I, when are we getting married? That's

1:08:12

right. So how long thereafter were you married? Oh

1:08:15

man, I think it was, I think

1:08:18

it was about a year and a half. So we

1:08:21

were in Boca Raton, Florida. I

1:08:24

was definitely a fish out of water in that town.

1:08:29

You know, there's a lot of, I

1:08:33

grew up in the Midwest in a town of

1:08:35

6,000 people in a farm town. Now

1:08:37

I'm in Boca Raton, Florida. Lots

1:08:39

of money. Super fabulous. Lots

1:08:42

of flash. Okay. Lots of that.

1:08:45

And so when me

1:08:47

and Katie got serious, it didn't

1:08:49

take long. And you

1:08:51

know, Katie's been sober for 15 years

1:08:53

now. And

1:08:58

I was on a path to get, it was

1:09:02

on my radar. And so I had asked her

1:09:05

in a couple of

1:09:07

questions that really resonated with me. And

1:09:10

you know, there's a lot of, there's a lot

1:09:12

of fake people in

1:09:14

South Florida, at least in my experience.

1:09:17

And so with Katie, I remember

1:09:20

asking her a question and it was

1:09:23

something along the lines of you

1:09:25

know, now that, you know, how do you

1:09:28

find real hobbies once

1:09:30

you're sober? Because I don't,

1:09:33

I had zero hobbies other

1:09:36

than boozing. And

1:09:39

she had a real answer and it was

1:09:42

just, that's

1:09:44

a great question. It

1:09:46

just takes time. But

1:09:48

she was engaged in that

1:09:50

conversation. And so I

1:09:52

knew, I was like, this is a good one. And

1:09:56

she's real. And I had

1:09:58

not been around a real. woman

1:10:02

in a long time

1:10:04

and that was, I still remember where

1:10:06

it was, it was at a Thai restaurant in

1:10:08

Fort Lauderdale and she had told me that and

1:10:10

I was like, the

1:10:14

conversation just got, I

1:10:17

couldn't talk to anybody like that other

1:10:19

than my therapist or anybody that had

1:10:22

been through something like that, like

1:10:24

what I was in the middle of. So

1:10:27

anyways, we got

1:10:30

closer and I knew

1:10:34

we were going to get married. I knew I was going to marry

1:10:36

her and I just, I said, I

1:10:38

don't want to raise my family in South

1:10:43

Florida. So we're going to have to leave and

1:10:47

so yeah, we wound up in Tennessee. Does

1:10:49

she have any roots there or was it

1:10:51

just the flocking to Tennessee that so many

1:10:53

conservatives did? No roots,

1:10:56

no roots. We just packed

1:10:59

up and went to Franklin. At least you

1:11:01

went from the one state with no state

1:11:03

income tax to another state. That's

1:11:06

right. New Hampshire is suddenly amongst

1:11:08

the crew. That's nice to see here in the

1:11:10

Northeast. Yeah, I know. I was like, it's blowing

1:11:12

up. We were looking there for a little bit.

1:11:14

Let's go Connecticut. That's right. It's not going to

1:11:17

happen. Hard to blue. That's all

1:11:19

good. On the hobby

1:11:21

front, have you considered needlepoint or as

1:11:23

my good friend describes it, a high

1:11:25

class finger sport. Interesting. I

1:11:28

have not. No. Are you into

1:11:30

needlepoint? No, no. I said we are too

1:11:32

young to be doing that. Get off the beach immediately with that monstrosity

1:11:34

in your hand. I

1:11:37

refuse to sit with you. So

1:11:40

did you find whatever a hobby? Business.

1:11:42

You're going to say it's this. It

1:11:45

involves this microphone. I found business and

1:11:47

that's my hobby. So yeah, my hobbies,

1:11:49

I mean, I don't have

1:11:51

time for them. I don't have hobbies either if it makes

1:11:53

me feel any better. I love being in my business. Now

1:11:56

you have two kids. I love being with my kids.

1:11:59

Anything outside of that. That is just not much time.

1:12:01

Yeah. No, there really isn't I mean I remember we had

1:12:03

kids a good friend of mine said you should tell your

1:12:05

friends You just had your kids and that you won't be

1:12:08

seeing them for about ten years That's right And

1:12:10

he's like the true friends will still be there for you

1:12:12

and you get there and the ones who aren't really your

1:12:14

true friends Good riddance we're

1:12:16

figuring that out. We are definitely

1:12:18

figuring that it's it's interesting how

1:12:20

fast Your taste and

1:12:23

friends changes. Yeah, you know, especially

1:12:25

I don't know how old your kids are

1:12:27

but 14 13 and 10 Okay,

1:12:31

nice. I'm looking forward to those

1:12:33

ages. They're great ages Highly

1:12:36

recommend this period of

1:12:38

parenthood. It's awesome. Really? They're

1:12:40

so easy and they're so fun And

1:12:42

they have the best personalities and they

1:12:44

still love us I

1:12:46

just I think we're in the sweet spot of parenting

1:12:48

right now when they're little I know you've got two littles

1:12:51

It's hard. They're adorable, but it

1:12:53

is hard labor. Yeah, we're in

1:12:55

potty training right now But

1:12:58

I love every minute of it,

1:13:00

you know, I just it's it's

1:13:02

it's a tough balance, you know

1:13:04

between work and and and family

1:13:07

but I always lean more towards family

1:13:09

and and And

1:13:12

it just goes so fast Yeah, I'm

1:13:14

already realizing that and I don't

1:13:16

want to you know I'm glad

1:13:18

that I waited until after service for

1:13:20

kids because it sounds

1:13:22

like you've listened to at least a couple of my interviews

1:13:24

and I Man,

1:13:27

you know, I'm just I'm glad that I never

1:13:29

had to put my I will

1:13:32

never have to put my kids through what

1:13:34

that was like what what it turned to

1:13:36

be into being gone all the time and

1:13:40

I'm a lot better now than

1:13:43

then back then and you don't have to live

1:13:45

with the regret of having missed it Yeah, even

1:13:48

for a good cause, you know, it's Hard

1:13:51

to miss it. I've talked to enough people who have

1:13:53

made a different choice You can just

1:13:55

hear the regret in their voice and see it on their

1:13:57

face and it's not recapturable

1:14:00

Once it's gone. Very

1:14:02

true. Very true. But, um,

1:14:04

you know, I think in Tennessee, you'll

1:14:07

do better in instilling values

1:14:09

into your kids that reflect your own, right? That's

1:14:11

one of the challenges here in the Northeast. Really?

1:14:14

Whoa. Yeah. I mean, these woke schools, we

1:14:17

fled our New York city schools because of that. Here

1:14:19

in Connecticut, we got it made. We did

1:14:21

our homework this time since we were

1:14:23

fleeing and, um, we found two great

1:14:26

ones, but it's important, right? Because you

1:14:28

find out when you're good, how old is your

1:14:30

oldest, your boy? Two and a half. Yeah. So

1:14:32

you find out when they start to go to school that the

1:14:34

schools are, they're your partners, I mean,

1:14:37

you need to find a partner. They're

1:14:39

the ones you're going to spend the most waking hours with

1:14:41

your kids every day. Yeah. So

1:14:44

if you're not on the same page about how

1:14:46

we're raising a boy or how we're raising a girl,

1:14:48

how we're creating a good

1:14:50

human being and future citizen, you

1:14:52

know, current citizen, but like, you

1:14:54

know, responsible citizen, things

1:14:56

can go south quickly.

1:14:58

That is a constant

1:15:00

topic of discussion at our house is, well, how

1:15:02

we're going to do that. Are we going to

1:15:04

homeschool? We're going to do private

1:15:07

school. What are we going to do? And, uh,

1:15:09

turns out we live in a, like a homeschool

1:15:11

in that go. That's good.

1:15:14

Yeah. So we're looking into

1:15:16

possibly doing that. I love

1:15:18

the homeschooling communities. I have a dear friend who's

1:15:20

doing that. Swears by it. So

1:15:22

what does life look like now? You do

1:15:24

the podcast like 25 hours a day. Honestly,

1:15:27

how do you do these five hour podcasts? Man,

1:15:30

I just, I

1:15:32

just listen, you know, and, and, uh,

1:15:34

you know, I, um, I

1:15:36

get people to open up about

1:15:39

things they've never talked about before

1:15:41

and go to places that they

1:15:43

probably have not been in their

1:15:45

mind in, in years. And,

1:15:48

um, and you

1:15:50

can't do that on

1:15:53

a time, on a timeline. You can't, you

1:15:55

can't do that in a condensed timeline. And

1:15:58

So. You

1:16:01

know, my longest one I think

1:16:03

is nine hours is that right? There

1:16:05

are always out with this. Get this

1:16:07

guy. Cody Alford he was i'm Marseille

1:16:10

guy like damn marine but dumb and

1:16:12

so. You know, in end. I.

1:16:15

Think the first one I did was right

1:16:17

about two hours and dumb. But

1:16:19

I'm a cab get longer and I

1:16:21

noticed the more time I spend on.

1:16:24

The. More time I gave them the more

1:16:26

they open up and. And. One

1:16:28

kind of developed into his his

1:16:31

i remember. I don't remember

1:16:33

who the first guy was. It might have been

1:16:35

this guy prime Hall, but. Didn't.

1:16:37

You any idea how many

1:16:39

people have been through? like

1:16:42

child trauma, sexual rama, abusive

1:16:44

parents? Whatever it is, And.

1:16:47

It's like. Everybody. And.

1:16:49

So are the first time that happened.

1:16:51

Day I was I heard I got

1:16:54

to start dives more into childhood. And.

1:16:57

And. A bad.

1:17:00

Seventy five percent of people have

1:17:02

come on ah, his experience some

1:17:05

type of abuse. Is child

1:17:07

and. And I dig

1:17:09

indo kind of what's happening today

1:17:11

with trafficking in. That

1:17:13

ophelia an end in all of

1:17:15

that kind of stuff. And so

1:17:17

I think it's really important dive

1:17:19

into the to the childhood stuff

1:17:22

because it gives. People that

1:17:24

have been abused that are trying to process

1:17:26

that stolen their adult lives and kids that

1:17:28

are gone to a right now me that

1:17:30

it shows. I'm like. Men:

1:17:32

Have no matter what I'm going to right

1:17:35

now like I can still. Find.

1:17:38

Success and N N. Find.

1:17:40

Happiness and my son. And you know this

1:17:42

is not a lot of people doing that

1:17:44

right now. And so. When. Somebody

1:17:47

goes into their childhood experience and

1:17:49

on and they're gonna. They're. Gonna

1:17:51

get descriptive about it. You know that when

1:17:53

they're done and more were done with that

1:17:55

section, I always ask him out for. For.

1:17:58

A kid. that's. In your

1:18:00

position right now. You. Know looking

1:18:02

back, what what could you have done or

1:18:05

what would you advise You know? Other.

1:18:08

Kids that are in your position or word

1:18:10

or other. You. Don't I'm trying to see.

1:18:12

What? What advice do you have? Farm and. Am

1:18:15

I mean it's open? He knows really help

1:18:17

him and then and then we'll get into

1:18:20

the military stuff and it's super descriptors and

1:18:22

you know and and I wanted to be

1:18:24

i don't wanna condensed form of because when

1:18:26

I started doing this I'm wanted to do

1:18:29

it because. These

1:18:32

guys were get a voice in the media

1:18:35

at all. he up and com. And.

1:18:38

When they did, it was a thirty second blurb.

1:18:40

And you know, so. Why?

1:18:42

Are we have been. Talking. Heads

1:18:45

in the media documenting what happened

1:18:47

over there. Are. With.

1:18:49

A bunch of people who weren't there the thought they

1:18:52

knew. And so I wanted

1:18:54

to have a kind of started

1:18:56

was I wanted to document history

1:18:58

the way it actually happened with

1:19:00

people that were at the events.

1:19:02

And so now is God. You're

1:19:04

just about every major operation that.

1:19:07

Has. Happened here. we got. I.

1:19:10

Heard the one with and forgive me I don't

1:19:12

remember his name that the gentleman who the last

1:19:14

his arm and his leg in the Afghanistan from.

1:19:17

Tyler. Vargas. Oh. My God and that

1:19:19

and it is is. This whole life had

1:19:21

been rough with his dad, was a child

1:19:23

molester and it was just there was a

1:19:25

lot. In there and those

1:19:27

stories are. They. Are infuriating,

1:19:30

right? Because their recent and we live

1:19:32

them and we still have the same

1:19:34

leaders who have yet to make any

1:19:36

apology for what happened. You guys like

1:19:38

Tyler Nothing. Yeah. It's

1:19:40

are. Buried Scourging. I mean,

1:19:42

he's a perfect example though. You know he.

1:19:44

He. He. Interviewed with

1:19:47

Good Morning America for seven

1:19:49

hours. Did. He really and

1:19:51

they released. I believe he said

1:19:53

five seconds of then interview because

1:19:55

it made. Potus. Look

1:19:57

so bad. and And

1:20:00

so I reached

1:20:03

out to him. I wanted to give him

1:20:05

the opportunity to get his story out and

1:20:07

he had testified in front of Congress and no,

1:20:09

no, I mean, none of us were getting the

1:20:11

actual boots on the ground version of what the

1:20:14

hell happened during that withdraw. And

1:20:16

so he came on. We got

1:20:18

it out. They tried to censor us and

1:20:21

he had all kinds of actual

1:20:24

footage of what was going on and they kept dinging

1:20:27

us. So you can't have that in there. You can't

1:20:29

have that in there. Who was? YouTube,

1:20:32

you know, and it's like, guys,

1:20:34

like this happened. Like, how

1:20:36

dare you censor what happened to

1:20:38

a U.S. Marine? Yeah, it's like

1:20:41

this is actual footage. This is

1:20:43

a lot of this footage has been

1:20:45

some of it had been in the media and it's

1:20:47

like, guys, you can't like this is

1:20:49

this is what happened. So we'd be yanked all

1:20:51

the footage and then put it behind. Put

1:20:55

the real version behind the paywall because the

1:20:57

most important thing was just to get his

1:21:00

story out and we wanted to. They

1:21:02

wanted to, we want to get that out,

1:21:04

you know, after several attempts, but

1:21:07

not for nothing. I know this isn't at all

1:21:10

why you're doing this, but in any sane world, you'd be

1:21:12

getting an award for that kind of coverage. In

1:21:15

any sane world, somebody like you would get

1:21:17

recognized with a P body for something

1:21:19

like that. Not the nonsense that now

1:21:21

gets rewarded with Pulitzer's and other awards

1:21:23

like the Cronkite or that's

1:21:26

actual journalism actually getting the story and being unafraid

1:21:28

to tell it. No matter where it takes you.

1:21:30

Thank you. We actually

1:21:32

pulled a sound bite from that interview. Here he

1:21:35

is. Tyler Vargas,

1:21:37

Andrews talking about what happened

1:21:39

during the attack as we

1:21:41

withdrew from Afghanistan. Like

1:21:44

10 minutes goes by and just

1:21:47

flashed get hit with this

1:21:49

massive wave of pressure and then I'm like my eyes,

1:21:51

my eyes are closed. The vision's black and

1:21:54

I'm like slowly coming to my right

1:21:57

ears, just like super high pitched ringing. My

1:22:00

left ear is muffled and I can just hear

1:22:02

people screaming in the distance. And

1:22:04

I'm just like struggling to open my eyes. Finally I

1:22:07

can open my eyes and there was someone else's fucking

1:22:09

body part just like laying in front of me. And

1:22:11

the people on the other side of the canal just

1:22:14

immediately in front of me just got fucking evaporated. I

1:22:16

kept trying to stand up. I'm like, fuck,

1:22:18

why can't I stand up? We start taking shots

1:22:21

in the neighborhood and

1:22:23

I'm almost going to be like, I'm

1:22:25

trying my fucking hardest to crawl

1:22:28

backwards. All I could do was put my left arm

1:22:30

on the ground and I'm just like, fuck, why

1:22:33

is my right arm not working? I remember lifting it up. It's

1:22:35

there, but it's just like fucking

1:22:38

shredded up at the elbow and

1:22:40

bloody. And I'm just fucking red

1:22:42

everywhere. Pretty

1:22:47

horrific. We just

1:22:49

got into this recently because President

1:22:52

Biden's former press secretary, Jen Psaki, wrote

1:22:54

a book trying to say

1:22:56

it's not true. He looked at

1:22:58

his watch when the bodies came home to Dover.

1:23:02

It's a lie. He looked at his watch several

1:23:04

times. She's still running cover for

1:23:07

him and her job is a so-called journalist. It's

1:23:09

on tape. You can

1:23:11

see it repeatedly. There he is in the ceremony over

1:23:13

and over trying to sneak in glances. And

1:23:16

some of the parents of the fallen are

1:23:18

very angry still about that and now

1:23:20

about the lies to whitewash it. But

1:23:23

this is – no one ever got fired for any of

1:23:25

it. So how are

1:23:28

these guys, like Tyler,

1:23:30

feeling about that

1:23:32

and about the administration and how it was handled? I

1:23:36

mean, they're enraged. We're all enraged.

1:23:38

I mean, do you know that we're

1:23:40

sending $40 million a week to the

1:23:42

Taliban now? Right. It's

1:23:44

actually like $43 million to $87 million a week. The

1:23:49

Taliban. The

1:23:51

same people that we fought for, what, 20-plus

1:23:54

years? For

1:23:56

now, not allowing girls to go

1:23:59

to school. dressing them in full

1:24:01

burkas, marrying them off at age 12.

1:24:03

That's those people. Yeah. Cutting

1:24:06

people's heads off, assassinating

1:24:08

all of our allies over there, lining them

1:24:11

up, shooting them in the back of the

1:24:13

head. I mean,

1:24:15

it's, it's, uh, pretty,

1:24:17

I just

1:24:21

don't know how anybody can support that. Why

1:24:23

are we doing that? Why are we, why are we

1:24:25

doing that? Why are we giving Iran money, you know,

1:24:27

or we're up until 10, seven,

1:24:31

I don't, you know, I wish

1:24:33

I could answer that. I don't, I

1:24:36

just don't know. I, I, it doesn't, you

1:24:39

know, what's up is down now and what's left

1:24:41

is right. What's black is white. And, and, uh,

1:24:45

it's, it's the deconstruction

1:24:49

of America.

1:24:52

Well, what do you, I mean, it's

1:24:55

gotta be directly related to the recruiting rates. No,

1:24:57

like guys are looking at

1:24:59

this saying, why am I, why

1:25:01

would I join up for that? There's

1:25:03

no responsibility. Our lives are taken for granted.

1:25:08

No one, no one gets fired. No one says, sorry,

1:25:10

we continue to funnel money to our enemies who,

1:25:13

how much blood and treasure was lost in Afghanistan

1:25:15

fighting the same group, which we're now funding, I

1:25:18

just like, I know people say that's not it. No, I

1:25:20

think that's it. We looked at the surveys as to why

1:25:22

guys are not signing up anymore. And

1:25:24

like the top, the top item was

1:25:27

fear of death, which is

1:25:29

okay. Yes. Normal, but

1:25:31

for centuries and

1:25:33

guys have been getting past that and signing up anyway,

1:25:36

but they're not. So what, what is it?

1:25:39

I mean, I think it has to do with a lot

1:25:41

of things. I think, I think it had to do with

1:25:43

the forced taxes. I think

1:25:45

it has to do with the woke agenda.

1:25:47

I mean, nobody, I

1:25:49

mean, talk about miscalculating

1:25:51

your, your, your, your body

1:25:53

of work. I mean, it

1:25:56

is not liberal Democrat.

1:26:00

families that sign up for the military.

1:26:03

It is middle-class to

1:26:05

low-class conservative families and you

1:26:07

just alienated your entire base.

1:26:10

Nobody wants to do that. Nobody

1:26:13

wants to go to become a SEAL

1:26:15

to be going to gender

1:26:19

ideology crash courses and

1:26:22

pronoun training or whatever the hell else they're

1:26:24

doing in there how not to be a

1:26:26

right-wing extremist and I mean with your

1:26:29

white rage yeah

1:26:31

yeah and I

1:26:33

mean if I think it's

1:26:35

that I think it's the way the war

1:26:37

has ended I think it's it's it's the

1:26:39

new advertising that they

1:26:41

do for recruitment he's a lesbian yeah

1:26:43

her mother's your LGBTQ it's

1:26:47

it's everything everything about

1:26:51

what the messaging they're putting out is

1:26:53

is who

1:26:56

are they gonna get right I mean

1:27:00

the numbers are at record lows and

1:27:02

we are precariously perched

1:27:04

on possible

1:27:06

conflict god forbid in Ukraine

1:27:09

the United States doesn't want any part of that god

1:27:12

forbid the Middle East and they're

1:27:15

still talking about Taiwan like it's like I

1:27:17

don't like we might actually get involved over there I was talking

1:27:21

to a former Navy SEAL whose name you would know and

1:27:23

he was like we're

1:27:25

not gonna win the Taiwan thing like they're

1:27:28

gonna take it China's gonna take it and there's

1:27:31

not much we're gonna be able to do about

1:27:33

it without actually getting involved militarily boots on the

1:27:35

ground and the American people aren't gonna want that

1:27:37

like if if China takes it his analysis was

1:27:39

we're gonna have to let him I

1:27:42

mean we'll probably provoke him to take it just

1:27:44

to start another war just to

1:27:47

spin up the military-industrial complex more than

1:27:49

it already is and and I mean

1:27:51

that's seems to be

1:27:53

what we do is we provoke

1:27:55

you know and then capitalize and

1:27:58

can you zoom out on that Sean do that like explain

1:28:01

that to me because I understand people who throw that term

1:28:03

around military industrial complex but

1:28:06

you understand it better than most yeah

1:28:09

so the military I mean let's let's

1:28:11

take it back to the

1:28:13

Iraq war I don't think

1:28:15

we should have been there at the time I think yeah

1:28:17

I was it was great I got action I got to

1:28:20

do what I signed up to do we got to kill a

1:28:22

bunch of bad guys now

1:28:24

that I'm older and I'm out and I

1:28:26

see a bigger picture I mean I just

1:28:28

think it's kind of weird that Dick Cheney

1:28:31

was the CEO Halliburton Halliburton was the biggest

1:28:33

logistics not the biggest probably

1:28:35

the only logistics company

1:28:38

in both wars

1:28:40

and so everywhere you went it

1:28:43

was Halliburton did laundry

1:28:46

Halliburton did the gas Halliburton

1:28:48

built the barracks Halliburton built

1:28:50

the chow hall Halliburton cooked

1:28:52

the food Halliburton did they

1:28:54

did everything the mail everything

1:28:57

it was KBR Halliburton he

1:29:00

was the CEO of that so all all

1:29:03

infrastructure in the entire

1:29:05

Iraq war with Halliburton

1:29:08

who is the former CEO

1:29:11

is the president is the vice president of

1:29:13

the United States mm-hmm that's

1:29:18

what we're getting at you know there's

1:29:20

then there's there's you know there's Boeing

1:29:23

Lockheed Martin Raytheon

1:29:25

Northrop Grumman and all these that

1:29:27

they make a lot of the

1:29:30

tech and the missiles and the

1:29:32

planes and all of

1:29:34

these sorts of things guns communications

1:29:38

equipment everything that's everything

1:29:41

that that is new that's being

1:29:43

developed is it's not the

1:29:45

government developing it's these companies that

1:29:49

get paid ungodly amounts

1:29:52

of money to

1:29:54

fund to develop

1:29:58

things you would use it war and then they put people

1:30:00

like Nikki Haley on their boards. Exactly.

1:30:04

I mean, she not only was on the on the Boeing

1:30:06

board, but she has a

1:30:08

husband who's making military vehicles right

1:30:10

now. That's his side business, where

1:30:13

he's making the vehicles that will be used in war,

1:30:15

which they press it off of. Yeah.

1:30:17

This is what you're talking about. And then

1:30:19

she, you know, in her world was about to

1:30:22

step into the presidency and

1:30:24

what have have zero conflicts. Yeah. Yeah.

1:30:28

Or, you know, like Ukraine. I mean,

1:30:30

we send all of our stuff over

1:30:32

all of our missiles, our tanks, our

1:30:34

UAVs, our javelins, whatever you fill on

1:30:36

the blank. And so

1:30:38

now we have to replenish all

1:30:41

the stockpiles and which is banking these

1:30:43

companies. It's given the companies work to

1:30:45

make more money. And that's

1:30:47

what this I'm convinced that that's what this

1:30:50

is all about. The

1:30:52

saber rattling. And

1:30:54

the reason the politicians do it is because

1:30:56

these are big donors. Yeah.

1:30:58

I mean, I can't be, you

1:31:01

know, you would probably know more about

1:31:03

that than I do. But yeah, I mean, lobbying

1:31:05

organizations. Hey, you

1:31:10

look at all the people that are

1:31:13

supporting what's going on in Ukraine and

1:31:15

Russia and still. Yeah.

1:31:18

It's in why were we

1:31:20

I mean, why were we in

1:31:22

Afghanistan for 20 plus years just

1:31:25

to completely abandon it? Yeah. We

1:31:27

had so many things we could have used there.

1:31:29

We gave up Bob Bob from Air Force Base,

1:31:33

one of the most strategic Air Force

1:31:35

bases in the world. Afghanistan

1:31:38

has endless amounts of lithium that

1:31:41

we could utilize for our green

1:31:43

initiative. Right. But

1:31:45

we'll just give those over to China and

1:31:47

let them sell us the lithium, even though

1:31:49

we had built all the infrastructure there and

1:31:52

they're already mining it. Why? Why

1:31:54

would we do that? Why would we give it up? Yeah.

1:31:57

Because we made a decision to cut and run and that was the.

1:32:00

I mean, the problem on that one, both parties

1:32:03

are to blame, right? I mean, Trump came up

1:32:05

with a plan and then Biden executed it terribly.

1:32:08

But I mean, Trump too wanted to pull us out of there

1:32:10

and not keep anything. I mean, I realized

1:32:12

we were over a war and I mean, the forever

1:32:14

wars are a real thing and people

1:32:16

who grew up, I mean, I'm a

1:32:18

little older than you are, but both

1:32:22

of us grew up in a time where in the beginnings we thought, you

1:32:24

know, we were going to be a little bit more of a big

1:32:29

deal. And in the beginnings, we thought these are just

1:32:31

wars and we're serving a

1:32:33

worthy cause here. And we understand

1:32:35

why the United States is doing it. It's only having

1:32:37

sort of been in

1:32:40

the midst of this, like, belief and then seeing

1:32:42

it all crash down and then seeing the aftermath

1:32:44

that you realize, I was sold a bag of

1:32:46

goods. It's

1:32:48

really interesting if you can take yourself out of

1:32:50

the politics and

1:32:54

in your emotional state and look

1:32:56

at these things from like a 30,000 foot view.

1:33:00

And it might paint a different perspective

1:33:02

and, you know, maybe we aren't

1:33:06

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A M A C. That us

1:35:10

forward/and eats you. I am. What

1:35:16

do you think will happen with screens mean?

1:35:18

at what point does the United States say.

1:35:22

They're definitely can't win is throwing good

1:35:24

money after bad. And

1:35:26

get more aggressive without forcing some sort

1:35:29

of compromised and to this thing. Ma'am.

1:35:32

What I think will happen in Ukraine I think.

1:35:35

I'm in, I think a change in

1:35:38

the presidency. Could. Possibly ended

1:35:40

cars or Ukraine's ours.

1:35:43

I don't think there's will ever. I. Mean,

1:35:45

why would not? Now you're why would you.

1:35:48

So. Much their didn't so much out of this

1:35:50

but damn. I'm just saying really. I don't know

1:35:52

that the Ukrainian people are as insane as Zaleski

1:35:54

seems, with is no compromise if we're in. A. c

1:35:56

thirty and all you people will be dead

1:35:58

the or the or I

1:36:01

don't know. I mean, I

1:36:06

think this BRICS thing has a

1:36:08

lot. I think that things

1:36:11

will get interesting when China starts making more

1:36:13

moves. That's

1:36:16

what I think. I don't think any of these wars are

1:36:18

going anywhere. Should we have nothing to do with that? With

1:36:20

Taiwan, China. Man,

1:36:25

you're asking some tough questions. That's

1:36:32

one I think we would probably need to step

1:36:34

in on. Actually step in

1:36:36

though. I mean, do you agree boots on the ground

1:36:38

would be required? How are we going to fight that

1:36:40

one from drones? How

1:36:45

are we going to fight that? I think that.

1:36:52

I don't know. Definitely

1:36:55

a lot

1:36:59

of Navy. That's right.

1:37:02

We don't have enough ships. A lot of Navy.

1:37:06

And I think all of our allies

1:37:08

would need to come together to – I

1:37:10

mean, I think that – I

1:37:13

mean, I personally think we're on the brink of World

1:37:15

War III. With China. Yeah. Over

1:37:18

Taiwan? I

1:37:20

mean, look at all the angles they have on

1:37:23

us. They are behind the fentanyl

1:37:25

crisis. They're sending in all the

1:37:27

supplies. They're trading the cartels. How

1:37:30

to make the world's most potent

1:37:33

fentanyl. Actually, now

1:37:35

they're teaching them how to make nidusan,

1:37:38

which – so it went from what, heroin

1:37:40

to fentanyl to nidusan. They're

1:37:43

behind that. They're buying all our

1:37:45

farmland. They're capturing all of our

1:37:48

elites, politicians, and just

1:37:50

tech gurus. I mean – I

1:37:53

can mention the spying. Yeah.

1:37:55

I mean, we have our – I mean,

1:37:57

yeah, that's out there, right? What's his name?

1:38:00

was sleeping with a Chinese spy. Eric Swalwell,

1:38:03

right? I get my far

1:38:05

left Democrats confused. I

1:38:08

can't remember his name, but that's who

1:38:10

it was. But I mean, they have

1:38:12

so, I mean, look at California. From

1:38:14

what I understand, all the real estate

1:38:16

signs now are all in Chinese. And

1:38:18

I've always wondered, I mean,

1:38:20

you see this massive migration

1:38:22

happening all across the country

1:38:25

with the red

1:38:28

states being inundated with people

1:38:31

fleeing California, New York, Chicago.

1:38:34

And I always wondered, you

1:38:36

know, who's buying all this real

1:38:39

estate over there? If everybody's leaving.

1:38:41

Yeah, right. They're selling it to

1:38:43

China. We rolled out

1:38:45

the red carpet for them when it came to visit. Their

1:38:47

takeover of Hollywood. Yeah.

1:38:50

The NBA. Yeah. They

1:38:53

have more money than God when it comes

1:38:55

to buying things that are American or

1:38:57

American owned. You know, their own people can suffer.

1:39:00

But they're very interested in spending

1:39:02

tons of money buying up our

1:39:04

industries and our land. And

1:39:07

we're just suckers for the dollar. So

1:39:10

we say yes. Yeah. You know, that's why the

1:39:12

NBA said, sure, we'll

1:39:14

do whatever you want. And we won't criticize you.

1:39:17

That's why Hollywood takes anything they find offensive

1:39:19

out of its films. So they can

1:39:21

make money over in

1:39:24

China on, you know, the sales there. We've

1:39:26

bent the knee, you know,

1:39:28

to our Chinese masters. So you're right, it's happening in more

1:39:30

and more people just aren't paying attention. They're living their lives,

1:39:32

not paying attention to a little bit

1:39:34

more here and there. But they're not happening all over the

1:39:36

world. I mean, look what they're doing in Africa. You know,

1:39:38

they're settling Africa. They

1:39:41

are the influence in Afghanistan now. I

1:39:43

mean, they go in with their money and

1:39:46

they make these countries dependent on them. And

1:39:48

that used to be us. That used

1:39:50

to be the United States being the leader of the free

1:39:52

world and being out there helping the third

1:39:54

world countries and in creating

1:39:56

some loyalty and some allyship.

1:40:00

We're not doing that anymore, but China is. You're

1:40:04

exactly right. And then – I mean,

1:40:10

that right there alone shows how many angles

1:40:12

they have. And I know there's more. I'm

1:40:14

just put on the spot. Yeah.

1:40:16

It's scary to think about. It

1:40:19

is. It's very scary. And

1:40:21

I don't think people understand

1:40:25

how pertinent it is that we need to

1:40:28

start addressing this stuff like yesterday. I

1:40:31

mean, the one thing we have going for us is their economy is

1:40:33

not strong. That's what I keep

1:40:35

hearing. But I hear

1:40:37

both sides, and I don't

1:40:41

– I mean, they

1:40:43

have so much influence across

1:40:47

the world now and their

1:40:49

version in the

1:40:53

BRICS initiative. You're aware of the

1:40:55

BRICS initiative and devaluing our

1:40:57

currency. And I think the last time I checked,

1:40:59

there's like 22 countries on board that now. And

1:41:03

it's a sketchy crew, but they have a lot of money.

1:41:06

Yeah. So now

1:41:09

more than ever, we need new up-and-coming,

1:41:11

the next generation of Sean Ryan's.

1:41:13

Yeah. Yeah, I guess so. So what

1:41:15

do you do? Trump's got to win. And

1:41:19

people have to see America as strong again. And maybe

1:41:21

you'll be a little afraid of us. I

1:41:25

mean, the New York Times just did a poll showing

1:41:27

that Trump's beating Biden in five out of

1:41:29

the six swing states, same

1:41:31

as it was in November. But I had a healthy margin in

1:41:34

most of them. And they

1:41:36

were so befuddled by their own poll, they went back to

1:41:38

their – to the people who

1:41:40

responded to say like, why? Why? What is

1:41:42

it? Really? The orange man?

1:41:45

He's so bad. How could you? Insurrectionist. And

1:41:48

in particular, it was interesting because they went to some

1:41:50

black voters saying, we don't get it. Why are your

1:41:52

numbers surging? And they said, you

1:41:54

know, we don't love Trump. He's got a big mouth.

1:41:56

He says some stuff we don't like, but he's strong.

1:42:00

I think the country's going to be a little

1:42:02

safer with him in there. He keeps people off

1:42:04

balance. And then others said the

1:42:06

economy, I don't need to like him. I need

1:42:08

my wallet to be a little fatter. And

1:42:10

it was, they just did some look back in

1:42:12

the economy was like, a fineably 16%

1:42:16

more was going into people's average paychecks under

1:42:18

Trump than it is now. Um, so

1:42:22

yeah, we need a strong leader. There's

1:42:25

a chance we won't get one. It's

1:42:27

not a lock Trump wins. Robert

1:42:30

Kennedy, also anti-military industrial

1:42:32

complex. Could you ever vote for him? I

1:42:35

think I could vote for him. Could you? Yeah,

1:42:38

I definitely could vote for him. He's too left for

1:42:40

me on many, many issues, but I'm

1:42:42

not as hardcore conservative as like a

1:42:44

lot of my audience. Um,

1:42:47

I love that he's kind

1:42:49

of anti-establishment, anti-military industrial complex,

1:42:51

anti-big pharma, that he's an environmental lawyer. I'm actually,

1:42:54

I'm kind of green. I like the green agenda,

1:42:56

not the green new deal or any of that

1:42:58

nonsense, but like I, as a mother, you know,

1:43:00

I would like to see us be a little

1:43:02

bit more realistic about this climate change. You

1:43:04

know, that's something I love

1:43:06

talking about this, you know, because you, you

1:43:09

do something positive for the planet and conservatives

1:43:11

like throw a shit bed. And

1:43:13

it's like, Hey man, we live here. Right.

1:43:17

In case you haven't noticed, everybody's

1:43:19

dying of cancer, cancer

1:43:22

from shit in our foods, cancer from

1:43:24

shit in the air, cancer from cancer

1:43:26

from everything. It might be, you

1:43:28

know, might be good for us to improve

1:43:31

the planet a little bit. That's just my

1:43:33

take. What if we had a RFKJ in

1:43:35

there saying, don't eat that, don't do that.

1:43:37

That's not getting a blessing anymore. This is

1:43:39

a problem over here that he spent his

1:43:42

whole life filing lawsuits against people

1:43:44

who are polluting our environment in one

1:43:46

way, shape or form. I

1:43:48

love that. I realize, I mean, he,

1:43:51

he said he would allow abortion to the ninth

1:43:53

month. Then he walked it back. He's

1:43:55

not good on my issue, which

1:43:57

is women's rights against the crazy

1:43:59

trans. lobby, but I

1:44:01

have more issues than just that. So

1:44:03

I definitely could vote for R.I.K.J. I

1:44:05

just asked him about the full

1:44:07

term abortion thing. I just interviewed him

1:44:10

last week and he told

1:44:12

me that the only reason that he would go

1:44:14

full term would be for the mother if she

1:44:16

was going to die, if there

1:44:18

was a life threatening situation. So

1:44:21

he arrived at that a little late. Yeah. He

1:44:23

told Sage Steele, it's up to the mom. Whatever

1:44:26

she wants, all the way through ninth month. And

1:44:29

then Sage, who's amazing, was like, a lot

1:44:33

of us get uncomfortable when you say it's okay

1:44:35

for a mother just based on her own desire to

1:44:37

abort a baby at full term. And

1:44:39

he answered it again saying, well, I would. Oh,

1:44:41

really? But then all the shit storm came and

1:44:43

he walked it back. It was like, oh, oh,

1:44:45

oh. Gotcha. Gotcha.

1:44:48

I mean, I understand if that's your biggest issue and it is

1:44:50

for a lot of deeply

1:44:52

faithful people in particular. He's

1:44:54

out. Yeah. Anyway,

1:44:57

it all depends on your hierarchy of

1:45:00

principles. And I just

1:45:02

I love how anti-establishment he is. Me

1:45:04

too, man. Me too. So

1:45:07

speaking of faith,

1:45:10

you've had a bit of a metamorphosis in

1:45:12

your own life. I have. Is

1:45:14

that because of Katie or is that

1:45:17

your own journey? That's

1:45:19

my own journey. And do you

1:45:21

want me to go into it? Yeah. Okay.

1:45:25

Well, so

1:45:28

I interviewed some really I have

1:45:31

some really heavy interviews. Tyler

1:45:33

Andrew Vargas was one of them. And

1:45:36

I mean, it's

1:45:38

been a long time since I'd seen that. And

1:45:41

to see a 24 year old, you

1:45:44

know, my studio is on the second floor. And

1:45:47

to watch him hobble up there with one leg,

1:45:49

one arm, you know,

1:45:52

it's just. It

1:45:55

got to me. And the day before I

1:45:57

interviewed him, I interviewed a. a

1:46:00

hacker who had hacked into

1:46:03

all these websites and pedophilia

1:46:05

websites and downloaded all the

1:46:08

user list, got it to the

1:46:10

FBI. The

1:46:12

FBI did nothing with it until

1:46:14

I interviewed him. Super

1:46:18

dark interview. The

1:46:21

reality is, I mean, we pulled,

1:46:25

we caught a child predator in five

1:46:27

seconds because I didn't really, I was

1:46:29

like, you hear about this stuff, right?

1:46:32

And how common it is, but you

1:46:35

don't, I don't, I didn't see it. And

1:46:38

so he's in there and we're doing the interview and I

1:46:40

said, hey, you got your laptop, pull it out, get

1:46:42

in any, I don't care what it

1:46:44

is, Instagram, TikTok, whatever team chat room

1:46:47

you want. I just want to see how

1:46:49

long this takes. He made the screen

1:46:51

name Ashley 13, New Jersey,

1:46:56

literally five seconds. It's on camera. We

1:46:58

scream record until he was in

1:47:00

like a room where five seconds before 40 something

1:47:03

year old bam was one to meet a 13

1:47:05

year old girl at a wherever. Yeah.

1:47:10

And so, so that's that's

1:47:13

what I mean, this is the stuff that I cover. And

1:47:17

so me and my wife were going on vacation.

1:47:19

I just, I just finished up those two interviews,

1:47:21

especially the one with, with Ryan Montgomery, he's

1:47:24

the hacker. That

1:47:26

just really got to me. You know, the

1:47:28

kids really gets to me. The guys who

1:47:30

work in that industry, shining those down. Yeah,

1:47:33

it's a very hard life. Yeah.

1:47:36

And, and so we

1:47:39

went to Sedona and there was

1:47:41

also what else was happening. The Chinese spy

1:47:43

balloon just flew over the, I saw, I

1:47:45

think it was, was it Reba

1:47:48

came out saying

1:47:53

no, I think it's freedom of speech

1:47:55

that that drag queens should be able

1:47:57

to, you know, show

1:47:59

up. in the library. Funnel kids.

1:48:02

And I'm just, and I got to this

1:48:04

point where I was like, man, am I

1:48:06

the only person that gives

1:48:08

a shit about this stuff that actually cares

1:48:10

about kids and why

1:48:12

we just abandoned our allies in Afghanistan

1:48:14

and why is there a

1:48:16

24-year-old that was blown up

1:48:19

unnecessarily? I mean, they had the guy P.I.D.

1:48:21

in his sights. They could have killed that

1:48:23

bomber, you know, and now all

1:48:26

of his friends are dead. And

1:48:29

so these are all the things that are going through my head.

1:48:32

And I had

1:48:34

hit this point. I

1:48:37

was having a conversation in my head and I had hit

1:48:39

this point where it was like, why do

1:48:42

you even talk about this stuff anymore? Nobody

1:48:44

cares. You know about the map

1:48:47

thing, minor attracted persons. Yeah, yeah. They're

1:48:49

trying to redefine pedophilia into this

1:48:52

minor attracted person normal, just like

1:48:54

a fetish. Like some people

1:48:56

have a foot fetish, some people have a

1:48:58

toddler fetish. And we're supposed to accept this.

1:49:01

Yeah. And so I'm just

1:49:03

seeing all these things and I'm like, how

1:49:05

can anybody buy into this shit? I

1:49:12

have family that like votes

1:49:16

left, you know, and it gets to me.

1:49:22

It makes my skin crawl. Like I

1:49:24

can't I don't understand

1:49:26

how anybody can support any of the what

1:49:28

I just list rattled off. And

1:49:31

so it got to me and I

1:49:34

got to this point where I was like, I'm

1:49:36

not I can't like I can't live like this

1:49:38

anymore. Like I can't if nobody gives

1:49:40

a shit, maybe I'm maybe I am the

1:49:42

one that is maybe

1:49:44

I'm the one that has something wrong with

1:49:46

it. You know, maybe maybe this is all

1:49:48

acceptable and I just I'm not my brain

1:49:50

isn't switching. Maybe I'm the problem and

1:49:53

I shouldn't be fighting this anymore. I need

1:49:55

to I need to be happy. And

1:49:58

it basically felt like Like I was surrendering

1:50:03

to evil and

1:50:05

I was trying to convince myself to

1:50:07

be fine with it. So

1:50:12

we're staying in this nice resort in Sedona.

1:50:15

They got a guarded gate and I pay

1:50:17

attention to that kind of stuff because of my background. And

1:50:21

a lot of the guys knew me

1:50:23

that worked there from my podcast and

1:50:25

wanted to talk. Well we were there

1:50:27

for a week, the last day I

1:50:29

walked through and it's this old

1:50:31

man in there

1:50:35

and he's wanted to talk to me. Me and my wife had gone

1:50:37

up to a hike because I was like I just got to get

1:50:39

the hell out of here. Maybe a

1:50:41

hike will make me feel better. Walk back

1:50:43

down and this guy starts

1:50:45

trying to talk to me. It's dark at this

1:50:47

point. I had already kind of surrendered like I've

1:50:49

done. I didn't feel good but I

1:50:52

had kind of made my decision like I'm not doing

1:50:54

this anymore. And I'm

1:50:57

kind of looking at him over the shoulder like I'm

1:51:00

not in the mood to like strike up a

1:51:02

conversation. But

1:51:05

my wife starts talking to him and

1:51:08

I'm like shit I just want to

1:51:10

go to my room. So I turn around and

1:51:12

this guy, this

1:51:16

guy read my mind from front

1:51:18

to back. And I

1:51:22

mean like I've never had that happen.

1:51:24

It wasn't – I

1:51:26

mean it was descriptive. It was – it

1:51:28

scared the shit out of me because I

1:51:30

was like how are you in my head?

1:51:35

And he started rattling off all these thoughts that

1:51:38

I was having on that entire hike and he's

1:51:40

like this stuff that's going on in China, that's

1:51:43

not your fight anymore. And this

1:51:46

stuff that's going on with the kids, that's

1:51:48

not your fight either. And this

1:51:50

stuff that's going on with the trans community, that's

1:51:52

not your fight. And

1:51:54

I had shut down. I was like How

1:51:58

is this guy in my head right now? So.

1:52:01

Freaked. Me out were walking back to

1:52:03

to our bungalow. We're in a place

1:52:06

where owes a car like a duplex

1:52:08

and dumb were on one side. Somebody

1:52:10

else on Earth aside. We. Got

1:52:12

there. We. Got when we got to Sedona.

1:52:16

My. Best friend that I was

1:52:18

referring to earlier same day he he

1:52:20

died about of a heroin overdose of.

1:52:23

Later. On but. Ah,

1:52:26

Game was a seal. Gables a

1:52:28

pro hockey player. Game was of

1:52:30

cider. I was and Anna May

1:52:32

Gables at the agency with me

1:52:34

and no matter where game was

1:52:36

Gables always always known as a

1:52:39

protector. Like no. Matter what

1:52:41

unit he was in. No matter what.

1:52:44

Who he was worth to be them

1:52:46

the dub dub manly as to all

1:52:48

men like everybody knows game. Is

1:52:51

going to. End. And

1:52:53

he was my best friend! What?

1:52:56

We get there and we see

1:52:58

this guy. He looks identical. Could

1:53:00

be games identical twin. I'm a

1:53:03

needed see differences but same brow

1:53:05

line, same jaw line, same build,

1:53:07

same walk, same three day shadow,

1:53:10

same everything. Ah, muscular and. Me:

1:53:12

And my wife are both. My panda looks

1:53:14

exactly like aid. And everywhere we

1:53:16

would go. This. Guy was that.

1:53:19

We're. At the pool this goes at the poor

1:53:21

were gone on a hike this guy was coming

1:53:23

back from. I have we around town get dinner

1:53:25

he was out of town get dinner and. And

1:53:29

we do. We had always thought it was weird

1:53:31

because I'd I'd can add a break down on

1:53:33

the plane. Hard to sit out on.

1:53:36

And. So. I was in a

1:53:39

vulnerable spot. My wife know what I was

1:53:41

in a vulnerable spot. I know it. Ah,

1:53:43

I was with my buddy Dave. And

1:53:45

he knew I'd And it was

1:53:47

is odd that gave who's always

1:53:49

known as a protectors like every

1:53:51

this guy to looks identical. Thomas

1:53:53

is everywhere. Well it turns out

1:53:55

right from that game we walk

1:53:57

to. Or bungalow. And

1:54:00

it turns out this guy and his

1:54:02

family his damn right across to. The.

1:54:05

thing from us. And

1:54:07

we had seen him all week. And. I'm like

1:54:09

that was weird and on the way back on

1:54:11

talent gating, I'm like holy shit like I think.

1:54:14

I. Think it was caught. It was

1:54:16

reading my mom and she's like

1:54:18

yeah Shaun that was got. And.

1:54:20

I'm like I can't believe this like

1:54:23

ours is happening in and she's a

1:54:25

song Gods always been around you. You.

1:54:28

Just don't make time for. And.

1:54:32

I. Knew that to be true. So we get

1:54:34

to the bungalow. Game. Seen across

1:54:36

the way or the the look alike

1:54:38

whatever you wanna call it is we

1:54:40

find out he stand right across is

1:54:42

all within like ten thirty minutes. Then

1:54:44

we go and the night I'm. I'm.

1:54:46

Tryin and I'm like I can't

1:54:48

believe this is happening in right

1:54:50

before. Also right before wanted his

1:54:52

aura. ah. A good friend of

1:54:55

mine. Are his name was dancer

1:54:57

a low died. Or he was

1:54:59

kind of the only. He. Was

1:55:01

a seal and a businessman.

1:55:04

And he lived in Franklin. And. I

1:55:06

don't have a lot of people that I can

1:55:08

relate to. Where

1:55:11

I live now and Franklin and Dan

1:55:13

is one of those guys did. That.

1:55:17

He's. Very successful. he owned couple hospitals,

1:55:19

he own the of a big security

1:55:21

business and he's like one of the

1:55:24

few people that I can sit down

1:55:26

more than talk business and taught friends.

1:55:28

and he doesn't need anything for me

1:55:30

and I don't need anything from him

1:55:32

And those you know, those relationships get

1:55:34

hard to come by and ah so

1:55:36

we hit it off really fast and

1:55:38

then he died on a hunting trip

1:55:40

with his son, had a heart attack

1:55:42

and dumb. And our.

1:55:45

But. Hey, I'm in that if there's a way to go. Get.

1:55:48

On him. But. Dark. Anyways,

1:55:51

his daughter. Who. I never

1:55:53

met. I'm have them as breakdown in

1:55:55

the in the hotel. And

1:55:58

our. Is. Dot. I

1:56:01

heard my phone go off while I was talking

1:56:03

to Katie. And as soon as

1:56:05

we kind of finished what we were talking about, about

1:56:07

what was going on, I checked my phone

1:56:10

and it's from his daughter. And

1:56:17

it's this text. I'd never even met her

1:56:19

before. And she

1:56:22

says, she

1:56:24

must have got my number from her dad's phone. And

1:56:27

she said, hey, Sean,

1:56:30

this is Taylor, Dan's daughter.

1:56:33

And I just walked into my dad's gun room

1:56:35

for the first time since he had passed away.

1:56:39

And he grabbed me by the arm and

1:56:43

told me that I needed to contact

1:56:45

you because you knew a side of him that

1:56:47

nobody else knew. And

1:56:49

that he wanted me to tell you

1:56:51

that he loves you just

1:56:53

the way that you are and that

1:56:56

you're doing exactly what you should be doing. And

1:56:59

then I'm trying

1:57:01

not to lose it right now, but

1:57:05

so that was like the third thing

1:57:08

all within, like I said, 10, 15 minutes. And

1:57:11

I was like, holy shit, like there's

1:57:14

no denying this one. And,

1:57:18

uh, yeah. And

1:57:21

so, you know, I

1:57:23

grew up Catholic and never really

1:57:25

took church seriously. Uh, I

1:57:29

never did. And then when I left home, I

1:57:32

never really went back and, and it kind of

1:57:34

lost faith. And, uh, I'm not saying I wasn't

1:57:36

a believer. I just didn't really care. I didn't

1:57:38

think about it. And, uh, I had definitely no

1:57:41

time for, for God. And

1:57:44

so I took that as a,

1:57:46

I mean, that was like a slap in the

1:57:48

face. And I, I decided I needed to get

1:57:50

serious about faith and at least look into it.

1:57:52

And so I started looking into it and, and

1:57:56

it's, and it's been great. And, and,

1:57:58

you know, and to be honest, it's the only thing I could. find

1:58:00

that makes any damn sense anymore. And

1:58:02

it's all, it's all in that book. Everything

1:58:04

we're seeing happening right now. Is

1:58:07

that how you started? Just reading the Bible? I did.

1:58:09

I did. I started trying to read it from front

1:58:11

to back and, and, uh, I

1:58:14

wasn't really getting anywhere and then shocking stuff

1:58:16

in that old Testament. If

1:58:18

you go that way. Yeah. And, um, but

1:58:21

then turns out, uh, as it turns

1:58:24

out, my entire team, I'm really close

1:58:26

with my team. Um, my podcast team,

1:58:28

the guys that work

1:58:30

for me and, and make it what,

1:58:33

what it is. And,

1:58:35

uh, turns out one guy's was

1:58:37

raised Southern Baptist, super well versed

1:58:39

in the Bible, my editor, Darren,

1:58:42

uh, grew up a Jehovah's

1:58:44

witness and, uh, escape

1:58:46

escaped it, but, but

1:58:48

knows, I mean, knows that book from front

1:58:50

to back. Um, um,

1:58:53

my it guy, Adam, uh,

1:58:56

devout Catholic knows it all

1:58:59

everything. Elijah, my production manager,

1:59:01

he's the Southern Baptist guy.

1:59:04

And they kind of started pouring into me

1:59:07

and, and a lot

1:59:09

of my buddies that were in the seal

1:59:11

teams, uh, Eddie penny really kind of paved

1:59:14

the way for all of this, I

1:59:16

think, uh, Eddie penny was, uh, we

1:59:18

were team two together. And

1:59:20

then he went on to dev group and,

1:59:23

uh, just like, oh, mom, like,

1:59:26

I mean, not who you

1:59:28

would expect to come to faith, but

1:59:31

he was my Christmas episode,

1:59:33

uh, couple of years ago. And

1:59:36

ever since he came on and gave

1:59:39

his testimony of how he came to everybody

1:59:43

that's been on the show has brought it up. And,

1:59:46

um, and he became kind of

1:59:48

a mentor of mine. So I called Eddie and

1:59:51

told him, and I said, Hey, this is what

1:59:53

happened. I don't

1:59:55

really know where to start. I don't really know what

1:59:57

this means. Uh, and. We

2:00:00

had a conversation and he

2:00:02

goes, he was like,

2:00:05

oh man, he's like a lot of us have

2:00:07

been praying for this to happen. Wow. And

2:00:09

that kind of freaked me out. I was like, well, what do

2:00:11

you mean? And he's like, we've

2:00:13

been waiting for this. He's like, you have

2:00:15

a big voice and

2:00:19

this needs to happen. And

2:00:21

so that was at about midnight. Now

2:00:24

I'm getting into some other kind of weird

2:00:26

synchronicity coincidences. And

2:00:30

so about 12 hours later, I had

2:00:32

a meeting that Adam, my

2:00:34

IT guide, scheduled with me at noon. And

2:00:40

Eddie was telling me during the conversation,

2:00:42

he was talking about Guardian Angels and

2:00:44

all this other stuff that was spiritual

2:00:46

warfare, stuff that I know like nothing

2:00:48

about. Well, fast forward 12

2:00:51

hours, I'm talking to Adam. I didn't

2:00:53

know what this meeting was. I thought it was about

2:00:55

email marketing or something. And he

2:00:57

wanted to talk to me

2:00:59

about spiritual warfare and

2:01:02

Guardian Angels. Wow. And I was

2:01:04

like, it was literally

2:01:06

like almost the exact same conversation as I

2:01:08

had had with Eddie Penny. You're like, that's

2:01:11

not on the dropdown menu of message manager.

2:01:13

I know. And they're not

2:01:15

friends. I mean, Adam is with

2:01:17

all due respect. They had the coordinated with you guys?

2:01:20

Eddie is a built like

2:01:23

a shit brick house, a dev group operator.

2:01:26

And Adam is a computer

2:01:28

nerd who I love to death. And

2:01:31

so, no, they don't. They don't.

2:01:33

There's no cross pollination. They're not

2:01:35

friends. I've never spoken exact same

2:01:37

conversation at noon. Come home for

2:01:39

lunch for my studio to be

2:01:41

with the wife and kids and

2:01:44

Adam. And

2:01:47

anyways, I go back to work. I

2:01:50

look at my clock in

2:01:52

my truck and it says it's 444. I

2:01:55

look at the odometer. It says 444 miles left

2:01:57

to E. Four

2:02:00

hours and forty four minutes after my

2:02:02

conversation with him about. Guardian.

2:02:04

Angels. So. I look up the

2:02:07

meaning of for Forty Four. And

2:02:09

it is. Your. Guardian Angels wants

2:02:11

you to know that day. As

2:02:14

guy you. And. I'm

2:02:18

just I'm like holy shit

2:02:20

and like we just had

2:02:22

to conversations about guardian angels

2:02:24

announce and for forty four

2:02:26

everywhere with them that gave

2:02:28

yeah, and and. And

2:02:31

sits in the meaning of that

2:02:33

supposedly according to google is. Your.

2:02:36

Guardian Angels wants you to know that. That guy

2:02:38

you. And dumb. And

2:02:40

so I've been in it ever since

2:02:42

and and have had some great mentors

2:02:45

and started going to church. That.

2:02:47

Didn't last very long as are

2:02:49

endowed. Now we have. We have

2:02:51

a a group of. There's.

2:02:53

For families including Us. Ah,

2:02:56

that lot of trust. Very close

2:02:58

friends of ours and we. We.

2:03:01

Just have a discussion every week.

2:03:03

every every Tuesday. So when I

2:03:05

get home today, that's. That's.

2:03:07

That's what we're doing. And now. It's

2:03:10

cool you get ask the tough questions. He.

2:03:13

Can't you don't to be embarrassed. You're

2:03:15

not going to offend anybody. Don't feel

2:03:17

judged like you're going to church. Everybody

2:03:19

and I was feel like I'm being

2:03:21

judged. oh hello or Catholic. a little

2:03:24

bit off and our and as none

2:03:26

of that and damn. Man.

2:03:28

You know when you. When. You

2:03:30

gonna take all of the be as the

2:03:33

religion can and Jackson the. End

2:03:35

of. Your. Journey. Of.

2:03:37

Building relationship with with.

2:03:40

The. Creator and Jesus. Is.

2:03:44

Really interesting and be a lot of fun.

2:03:46

I know, You're saying I am. My audience

2:03:48

knows I've been having it. Not.

2:03:51

Unrelated struggle, and that exact

2:03:53

score. Really? Yeah, yeah, I

2:03:55

man, I'm Catholic, lifelong Catholic.

2:03:57

and I. Started. The price.

2:04:00

of having my first

2:04:02

marriage annulled. Instead

2:04:04

of bringing me closer to God or setting me

2:04:06

in a path that I thought would land well,

2:04:08

it really has kind of alienated me. It's

2:04:13

caused a bit of a crisis of faith. Who

2:04:16

are these middlemen I have to go through in order

2:04:18

to have a clean relationship with God? That

2:04:20

doesn't make any sense to me. I

2:04:22

think God loves me and God sees

2:04:24

me in a loving marriage with three

2:04:26

wonderful kids who have two

2:04:28

great parents who are in love and

2:04:31

he's thrilled. He

2:04:34

will accept me into his kingdom when it's

2:04:36

all said and done. If he doesn't, it's

2:04:38

certainly not going to be because I got

2:04:41

a paper divorce from him, but I didn't get an annulment from

2:04:44

a priest and

2:04:47

then married Doug in a Catholic church. It doesn't

2:04:49

make any sense to me. That's

2:04:52

sort of where I am right now. I'm still wrestling

2:04:54

with it. I got tons of great feedback, by the

2:04:57

way, thank you to my audience, because so many thoughtful

2:04:59

emails on it from Catholic listeners,

2:05:02

but also just Christian listeners who don't

2:05:05

believe in that middleman thing

2:05:07

either. I

2:05:09

haven't resolved it. Well, I'll

2:05:12

keep my opinion to myself. Why? The

2:05:16

middleman is a lie. There

2:05:21

are no middlemen. It's

2:05:24

just about you and your relationship. And

2:05:26

that's it. Don't

2:05:28

let you know that. And

2:05:31

when you think like that, I mean, it

2:05:33

gives me a sense of peace. And

2:05:36

then you start looking at all the

2:05:39

stuff that's going on, like Transvisibility Day

2:05:41

being declared on Easter Sunday. You

2:05:44

can't tell me these aren't

2:05:46

signs. And this is all, like I said,

2:05:49

this is all in there. I'm still reading through it. I'm

2:05:51

not through it all yet. I don't claim to be an

2:05:53

expert, but I see

2:05:56

things. I have a team to lean on

2:05:58

who's well versed in this stuff. and

2:06:01

very fortunate and and

2:06:03

it's everything we're

2:06:05

seeing happen is in that

2:06:08

book and when

2:06:10

you can when you come

2:06:13

to that realization it's

2:06:15

really odd but all the stuff that like

2:06:17

all the stuff that was bothering me and

2:06:19

it still does bother me but

2:06:22

at the same time

2:06:24

it makes me stronger

2:06:26

because that was supposed to happen

2:06:29

you know that's in that book oh

2:06:32

like really like

2:06:34

trans visibility day a confusion

2:06:37

of genders on Easter Sunday making

2:06:39

a mockery of the resurrection like

2:06:43

that was in there yep and

2:06:47

and so so how do you feel now

2:06:49

do you feel a difference physically but

2:06:51

you know emotionally oh yeah

2:06:53

now versus during the Chinese trial

2:06:56

balloon period oh yeah which was dark

2:06:58

definitely I mean I'm at I'm

2:07:00

at peace with it I mean I'm

2:07:02

still gonna fight the good fight and I'm

2:07:04

still gonna bring truth and uncover corruption and

2:07:07

tell these stories and I'm not gonna bend

2:07:09

the knee to anything and and

2:07:12

but you know it it but

2:07:14

seeing it all happen it's it

2:07:18

is actually making me stronger because

2:07:20

I found something in a world

2:07:23

of nothing that makes any sense at all not

2:07:25

a damn bit of sense this

2:07:28

makes all the sense in the world it's it

2:07:30

aligns with the values that I've always had or

2:07:33

maybe I align with its values you

2:07:35

know but but it

2:07:38

yeah it's helped me and and

2:07:40

then you start learning

2:07:42

about you know maybe

2:07:44

forgiveness is for you and not for the

2:07:47

people that did

2:07:51

something bad to you that was unjust

2:07:53

you know it's it's it's for your sense

2:07:56

of peace up for theirs you know you

2:07:58

can you can go on and

2:08:00

waste all that bad energy hating somebody

2:08:02

and talking shit about them and you

2:08:05

know complaining you know I got screwed over and

2:08:07

I'm a victim and da da da da da

2:08:09

but the minute you forgive them that's off

2:08:11

your plate and it just it it's

2:08:14

it's it's like a cleanse amen

2:08:21

but God bless you thank

2:08:23

you so much for coming on

2:08:25

and telling your story and all these

2:08:27

personal details about your life what

2:08:30

a pleasure what a what an honor to know

2:08:32

you well thank you thank you for having me and like

2:08:35

I said I was really excited to meet

2:08:38

you and and I'm just happy to be

2:08:40

here I'm honored and honestly God bless

2:08:42

you thank you for your service thanks

2:08:44

to all of our military members active

2:08:46

duty and retired and those we've lost

2:08:48

for the service and sacrifice appreciate

2:08:50

it God bless you too I hope

2:08:53

this is the first of many shots thanks

2:08:58

for listening to the megan kelly show no

2:09:00

BS no agenda and no fear hey

2:09:12

guys Conan O'Brien here to tell you about some

2:09:14

of the stranger things we've been doing recently on

2:09:16

my podcast Conan O'Brien needs a friend recently

2:09:19

we had an episode where I sat

2:09:21

down with some

2:09:23

of the writers that I worked with on

2:09:25

Conan O'Brien must go that's my travel show

2:09:28

on max and we talked about

2:09:30

everything that goes into those shows and

2:09:33

a lot of very insane anecdotes

2:09:35

from our travels and adventures there's

2:09:38

another episode you might want to check

2:09:40

out where I discuss with

2:09:43

my physician Dr. Arroyo about

2:09:46

my experience on Hot Ones we talk

2:09:48

about my near death experience and

2:09:51

his complete inability to

2:09:53

help me because he may or may not be a

2:09:56

real doctor that's just some of

2:09:58

the stuff that's been going on and if If you

2:10:00

feel up to it, check it out. So catch up on

2:10:02

all things I've been up to on Conan O'Brien Needs a

2:10:04

Friend wherever you get your podcasts. You

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