0:00

On the Grit and Grace podcast . We

0:02

shine the spotlight on the stories behind the

0:04

leader .

0:05

So we did a big sign that said infertility sucks

0:07

. Supporter of Modern Miracle Foundation

0:10

. And so people come up to us . And what's this all about

0:12

? We donate proceeds from

0:14

MiniMod to the foundation and they literally

0:16

look beside them like she's an IVF baby , or he's an IVF baby

0:18

, or I struggle with

0:20

fertility .

0:21

Wow , I mean to support you . In this

0:23

episode , we break down the barriers of shame

0:26

and open up the discussion for women who

0:28

are suffering in silence . Join

0:30

me as I speak with Randy Grundberg , who

0:32

shares her fertility struggles . Alongside

0:35

her sister and their husbands , she co-founded

0:37

the Modern Miracle Foundation , a

0:39

charity that has successfully raised hundreds

0:42

of thousands of dollars to assist Canadian

0:44

families in affording IVF treatment

0:46

. This episode reminds us

0:48

all that we have the power to ignite change

0:50

and follow our passions one

0:53

step at a time . Let's dive

0:55

in , randy . I'm

0:57

actually really excited to speak with you today

0:59

. I am excited

1:02

to start this journey on the topic of

1:04

how we can take some

1:07

personal struggles and really transform

1:09

them into social change , and

1:11

I would love to just lay the foundation and

1:13

give everyone a bit of context for kind of what

1:16

brought all this on , share a little

1:18

bit of your backstory and

1:20

kind of how that sparked change for you as

1:22

it relates to your foundation and your business .

1:25

So I was pretty young and I was diagnosed with a

1:27

medical condition where I knew I

1:29

wouldn't be able to get pregnant . I think when

1:31

I was diagnosed with my medical condition , my

1:33

family is very , very close . I'm very close with my

1:35

sister . I think she always had

1:37

in her mind that she would be my surrogate

1:40

in the future and that was just something

1:42

she said . Okay , well , this is

1:44

something you're struggling with . There's no way I'm going to

1:46

struggle with it . You have your issue . There's

1:48

no way that it's going to be a problem for me . It's not talked about

1:50

doctors , don't really . You

1:52

don't have those conversations with your doctors . But

1:55

when she was ready to start

1:57

having her family and start trying , she

2:00

also struggled and dealt

2:02

with many years of fertility challenges

2:04

as well . After a really

2:06

long journey , they were so

2:08

beyond grateful that they were able

2:10

to go through what they needed to be able

2:12

to welcome their daughter . And we were starting

2:14

our journey and felt so grateful that we could pursue

2:16

surrogacy . It is extremely expensive

2:18

. We were like how do we bring

2:20

this feeling to other people ? How do we give

2:23

this absolutely incredible gift to others who want a child and

2:25

don't have the financial means to do so ? And

2:28

so we kind of just had this idea to start a charity . How

2:31

do we raise some money ? Can we help just

2:33

one family a year be able to achieve

2:35

their dreams ? And that's kind of where

2:37

it started . Fast forward to

2:39

today . We opened our grant application exactly

2:42

a year ago . We've now

2:44

helped over 10 families so far . We

2:47

have a few more that are now getting grants

2:50

in the process right now , which is absolutely incredible . Way

2:52

more than we envisioned , we've

2:55

raised a significant amount of money with the help

2:57

of some amazing donors , and

3:00

we have some really big plans for this year too .

3:03

Why do you think there's such shame and stigma

3:05

around this conversation ?

3:07

I think in society you

3:09

kind of grow up or you have this vision

3:11

of what life is supposed to be . You

3:14

grow up , you get a job , you get married , you have

3:16

kids and that's kind of just

3:19

the way society has brought

3:21

us up to be in this way of life . And

3:23

you kind of grow up thinking , okay , how

3:25

do I just prevent myself from ? getting pregnant

3:28

You're never really told like , oh , when you're

3:30

ready to have kids , it may not actually happen . So

3:32

you just automatically assume oh , this is just

3:34

how the woman's body works and it should just work

3:36

. So there's a lot of shame

3:39

in that and , I think , guilt that . You know why

3:41

isn't my body working ? Why is everyone else

3:43

seem to be being able to do this very

3:45

easily , like what's wrong with me and

3:49

with that you don't really want to share because you're embarrassed . Things

3:53

seem to come really easy for other people and

3:55

you don't really want to share that experience

3:57

.

3:58

People who are going through this like what advice do

4:00

you have for them with how to

4:02

deal with such a personal struggle ?

4:05

Everyone deals with it very different . You're gonna have

4:07

some people who I really like talking

4:09

things out . That's just my personality . I really

4:12

like to talk about my feelings . And then

4:14

you have someone , for example , like my sister and

4:16

she doesn't like to share . She's way more private

4:18

and there's a lot of people like that

4:20

. So I think it's about knowing

4:22

yourself and

4:24

knowing what you need , and I think a

4:26

lot of it comes down to , at least personally , and what

4:28

I see for a lot of other people is Is the support

4:31

network , whether or not it's your friends , your family is

4:33

your partner . You have to have a very if you're doing

4:35

this with a partner , a very strong partner . We have a very

4:37

open Relationship

4:39

and open conversation . Yeah , which is where

4:41

you know people have started online communities or

4:44

in-person communities , because people need to go and

4:46

speak to people and get their feelings out , and

4:48

you also don't feel alone when you start talking about

4:50

it .

4:51

Do you feel like this is the conversation that's gonna start

4:53

hitting the mainstream very shortly , for

4:55

sure on the rise ?

4:56

I think it's already happening . Yeah , we're seeing

4:59

it more and more the last couple years . You're

5:01

seeing more people coming out publicly sharing their

5:03

story . Yeah , and I think a lot

5:05

of us talk about this is going to be the next big

5:08

topic that's shared and talked about .

5:10

For sure you're balancing financial pressures

5:12

, family planning and

5:15

then professional ambitions , and

5:17

this is like a tricky nuance For

5:20

those who aren't so close to it . What challenges

5:22

aren't so obvious that are important

5:24

to vocalize here ?

5:25

There's a lot of things that happen behind the

5:27

scenes for those who are struggling with fertility

5:29

. So , for example , you know you might be working with

5:32

a colleague who maybe they're late to meetings

5:34

in the morning or maybe they're not responsive in the

5:36

morning , or , you know , maybe there

5:38

you can tell that they're struggling with something . I think

5:40

what people don't realize for those going through

5:42

fertility struggles is you know you're

5:44

at the clinic Three , four , five days

5:47

a week , multiple times per week You're going before

5:49

work , so you're trying to get there from the clinic opens because

5:51

you're trying to get back to your office or

5:53

back home for meetings . Yeah , physically

5:55

you're probably you can be on a lot of hormones

5:58

, things like that but

6:00

mentally it also impacts you as

6:02

well with the different hormones that you're on , so you

6:04

may be more emotional . You're feeling . You're

6:06

not feeling great , your body's not feeling great , so

6:08

that all has such a huge impact . Yeah

6:11

, you have no idea what someone is struggling with in their personal

6:13

life Could be anxiety , could be mental health

6:15

issues , could be relationship issues , and

6:17

Infertility is just one of those

6:19

things . I think that's where it just becomes

6:22

so important to be empathetic , and

6:24

when it comes to being a leader or a colleague

6:27

or a friend . You know , sometimes

6:29

, you know , friends don't want to come and hang out

6:31

at different events , say , there's baby showers , there's

6:33

things like that , and it's not that they

6:35

don't want to be there for you , it's that they're actually

6:37

really struggling themselves , and

6:39

then there's a lot of guilt that comes with that .

6:42

Well , let's just start with where businesses are making

6:44

changes , because I am seeing some policy

6:46

changes . But what are you noticing within

6:48

the professional landscape of providing

6:50

families more support ?

6:52

I think the main thing is around benefits . Yeah , you're

6:54

starting to see a lot more companies introducing

6:57

fertility benefits . Yeah , whether it's egg

6:59

freezing , basically

7:02

an amount to use towards IVF or fertility treatments

7:04

, things like that . And I would say

7:06

the financial burden out of all of this is

7:08

probably one of the biggest things , because

7:11

so much of the fertility is out of your control

7:13

. But now you're struggling with

7:15

the physical and mental side of

7:17

fertility struggles on top of this massive

7:19

financial burden . So you're running to

7:21

the clinic , you're late for meetings , you're paying thousands

7:24

of dollars out of pocket . It adds up to beef .

7:25

So how much does it cost , though , randy ? Like I

7:28

have no idea , and I'm learning through your journey

7:30

here , how much are we actually talking about ?

7:32

So for an IVF cycle it

7:35

could be upwards of $20,000 . For

7:37

one cycle .

7:38

Yes , and what's the probability that one

7:40

cycle actually works ?

7:42

There's so many factors that go into it , so

7:44

I think it really depends on

7:46

the situation , but

7:48

very , very expensive . I think now when you're

7:51

coming to surrogacy they say like

7:53

to budget somewhere of upwards , to say $80,000

7:55

.

7:56

Wow .

7:56

It's a ton of money and you can't just come up

7:59

with that money out of nowhere , right ?

8:01

So if there's anything people could kind of implement

8:03

in their life who might be feeling

8:05

all of the kind

8:07

of , you know , the emotional roller coaster

8:09

related to this like , what advice can we impart ?

8:12

I think a big thing comes back to your support network . So

8:14

, finding people that you trust , that you want

8:16

to talk to , outlets whether or not it's

8:18

, you know , going to therapy , talking to friends

8:20

, family member I think that's , that's

8:22

a really big part of it . Work is

8:25

such a big part of your life and so I think if

8:27

you don't feel supported at work , you need

8:29

to have those conversations , Having

8:32

a boss or a mentor at the office

8:34

who can advocate for you . You know , do you need

8:36

to move around your meetings , you know , as

8:38

opposed to causing a lot more stress , I

8:40

mean and stress is a huge part of the whole

8:42

fertility journey too , right ? Stress ?

8:43

has such an impact on your body .

8:46

So if you need to move around meetings

8:48

, have those conversations and

8:50

make sure that they're supportive of it , and

8:52

I think that's that's a big part of it . You know you

8:55

have to move meetings , you need to take some days off . Do

8:57

you need to reduce some workload ? Have

9:00

the conversations of how does that impact my career

9:02

.

9:03

Yeah , and I really wanted to talk with you and have this

9:05

conversation because as much as we can talk about

9:07

leadership in the professional sense , like we

9:10

are whole people going to work , and

9:12

these are the things that are in

9:14

the back of our minds every day . As

9:16

you kind of thought about your own

9:19

leadership journey , starting this foundation , what

9:23

have you learned the most about yourself through

9:25

this process ?

9:25

I like to think I'm an empathetic person . I

9:28

think this has made me even more empathetic , and

9:31

not just for those struggling with fertility , I think

9:33

it's . You know , you get an email from someone , and

9:36

maybe it's a cold email or a mean email , could

9:38

be from a customer or a client . You

9:40

start to realize , okay , you actually have no idea what that person

9:42

is going through .

9:44

What has been some of the more surprising insights

9:47

or lessons that you've learned ? Starting a foundation .

9:50

We're so grateful that we could afford the means to be able to

9:52

go through the treatments that we needed . There are so many people

9:55

who can't . Yes , how do we bring this incredible

9:57

gift to other people ? How

10:00

do we help alleviate that financial burden

10:02

so that they feel like they can achieve that ? And how do

10:04

we help other people achieve their

10:06

dreams of having their own family

10:09

? Because really it's

10:11

crazy to think about the financial reason should not be

10:13

or reason why someone can't start a family . You

10:16

know you're diagnosed with medical conditions

10:19

. There's things that are out of your control and you didn't choose

10:21

the path right , so

10:24

we believe that that shouldn't prevent

10:26

you from having the family that

10:28

you want to achieve .

10:30

So the Modern Miracle Foundation , how

10:33

does it all work for those who might

10:35

be curious to know more about it or how they can participate

10:38

in the foundation ?

10:40

Yes , so we have an amazing board that we lean

10:42

on for a lot of advice and

10:45

support and we have our medical advisory

10:47

team too . So

10:49

we have an application process . We

10:51

receive grant applicants , our team internally will

10:54

review them . It

10:57

goes through to our medical advisors who

10:59

help us look at the medical information . We're

11:01

not medical doctors , so we need

11:04

external experts helping us

11:06

review it . Then

11:08

, once we kind of evaluate all the

11:10

different applications , see how many applicants we have at

11:12

the time , how much available funding we have , then

11:14

we can decide and figure

11:16

out .

11:16

You know how can we allocate as much money as we can

11:19

and how does your business

11:21

play into this and share

11:24

with everyone listening a little bit more about

11:26

? On top of all of this , you've decided

11:28

to launch a business , which I

11:30

love . This is like . These are the conversations

11:32

that make me very excited . But how

11:35

has that process been for you kind of being

11:37

of now a business owner ?

11:39

Yeah . So I think we laugh about it Is that , on

11:41

top of you know , children and our

11:44

full-time jobs and the charity

11:46

we just wanted to add to our plate Because

11:48

why not ? But I

11:50

think it all kind of started with when

11:52

my niece was born . My sister was trying to find

11:55

some cool kids' clothes that

11:57

were you know , not cheesy , kind of fun clothes

11:59

that she wanted to wear herself that came

12:02

in kids' sizes , and so

12:04

we were kind of talking about it . She had this idea

12:06

. She loves being creative and

12:08

has that kind of spark behind her and

12:11

she was on mat leave at the time . So she was like , okay

12:13

, you know what , I'm going to look into this and see

12:15

what I can do here . And so she

12:18

started looking into manufacturers , trying to figure out , coming

12:20

up with designs , coming up with some kids'

12:22

clothes ideas , and then we

12:24

kind of decided to start in it together . We thought you know what

12:26

? It's a really fun , fun way to

12:28

use creativity . Then we also figured you know , there's

12:31

so many kids' clothing brands out there . Yeah , how

12:33

do we differentiate ours ? Yes , and

12:35

then we had the charities . We're like it's kind of a no-brainer If

12:37

let's use the

12:39

clothing brand which is called Mini-Mod , why don't

12:41

we use Mini-Mod in order

12:43

to then now bring more money into the charity ? So

12:45

now you can , you know , sell cool

12:47

kids' clothes , help make babies it kind

12:49

of like goes a little bit hand in hand , and

12:51

so on . It also brings a great mission to

12:54

the clothing brand , Entrepreneurship

12:56

and social change as a combination .

12:59

Has that ? Have the customers responded well

13:01

to it , Like what's been your experience with

13:04

this leading with venture for

13:06

social impact ?

13:08

I would say the social aspect of Mini-Mod is

13:11

really what drives , I would say , most of

13:13

our sales . So , for example , we

13:15

started off going to a lot of pop-up shops or markets

13:17

selling our selling the kids' clothes , and

13:20

so we did a big sign that said infertility sucks . And it said supporter

13:22

of Modern Miracle Foundation . And we

13:24

figured , you know what , from a marketing

13:26

side , you need to bring the customers in . What's kind

13:28

of like something really like bold to

13:31

try and bring them in . And so people

13:33

come up to us and be like so what's this all about ? Infertility

13:35

sucks . I see your sign , what's this all about ? And we said , oh , like

13:38

we started a charity . We help those who can't afford

13:40

fertility treatments . We donate

13:42

proceeds from Mini-Mod to the foundation and

13:44

they literally look beside them like she's

13:47

an IVF baby or he's an IVF baby or

13:49

I struggle with fertility . I need to support

13:51

you , mary-d .

13:52

I'm so inspired Like . The theme in this

13:54

whole thing is how do you take

13:56

personal struggle and turn it into

13:59

passion , and turn it into purpose ? This

14:02

is just a remarkable way that

14:04

you've done . You do this for everything , though . Like

14:07

you know , this is how you've structured your life

14:09

. When you I think about resilience to

14:11

do that , though , is there anything that comes

14:13

to mind about how you think

14:15

about resilience and the resolve

14:17

to do that ?

14:19

I think people just handle things differently

14:21

In terms of being resilient

14:23

. I think it's . I really

14:25

do try to find the

14:28

positive in everything . I

14:30

do think everything happens for a reason and I think

14:32

that's just the way I

14:34

operate . And I

14:36

think I do just try to find the

14:38

positive in these situations

14:40

and say , okay , you know , this

14:43

was the card I was dealt . Now

14:46

what can I do in order to

14:48

, you know , help other people with it ? I

14:50

love helping others . I think I've always been that type of

14:53

personality when , you know

14:55

, can I find some positive

14:57

in this and how do I turn this into

14:59

a bigger impact ? I think I've always wanted to do something

15:02

bigger in life , never

15:04

really knew what that was , and

15:06

this was just my way

15:08

of .

15:09

You feel like you're living it now . Like do you ? Feel like

15:11

that thing that was inside of you , Like I feel

15:13

like there's something bigger . Do you feel like you're living it now

15:15

?

15:16

I feel like I'm living it and I feel like there's even so

15:18

much more . There's so much more

15:20

to be done across I mean for fertility

15:22

. It's providing the financial grants

15:24

is one thing , it's advocacy

15:26

, it's making change , it's actually being

15:28

a part of that change so that you

15:30

know , maybe this , maybe the financial aspect of it

15:32

, doesn't become an issue for people in the

15:34

future . I think that's

15:37

like one piece of it . Can you even go

15:39

like above that and can you try and

15:41

you know work with the medical field and trying

15:43

to do preemptive testing for other

15:45

people's situations who are diagnosed later could have

15:48

been caught earlier ? So I think we

15:50

just have so many goals with Modern Miracle . Right

15:52

now it's focusing on the financial aspect , but

15:54

how do you , how do we make this even bigger

15:57

? Yeah , and how do we do more ?

15:59

And can you tease out anything ? You say you have big goals

16:01

for 2024 . Any specifics ? Like

16:03

I heard a rumbling of a gala , yes

16:05

, what are kind of some things people can

16:08

watch and support

16:10

?

16:10

So we have a big partnership that launched with

16:12

the new fertility clinic that's opening in Toronto

16:14

. They on top of coming out

16:17

with , you know , world-class equipment and an absolute

16:19

beautiful clinic to really focus on the patient

16:21

experience , yeah , and we will

16:23

be having a gala in May .

16:25

So it will be amazing . We'll put all of your website

16:27

links in the show notes too , so people can see them

16:30

.

16:30

And I think also if you have financial

16:32

means to make some donations

16:34

, they go a very long

16:37

way and if anyone wants to

16:39

support the kids clothing line

16:41

where do they go ?

16:42

So shopminimodcom , Okay

16:44

, You'll find kids clothing on there that

16:46

you can shop gifting for

16:48

your own kids , nieces friends

16:50

, the last topic I wanted to kind

16:52

of just talk about is

16:55

advice for aspiring women leaders

16:57

, Any advice you can

16:59

give folks to just if they are feeling

17:01

kind of a passion to

17:03

create a business for social

17:05

change . What

17:08

are some tips that people could take away ?

17:10

So lean into your network . I think that

17:12

was a big thing for us . I struggle

17:14

asking for help , and

17:17

that's a big thing . I've had to really learn

17:19

and people do love to help , and especially

17:21

when they feel that the cause resonates

17:23

with them . And so lean

17:25

into your network , I think . Find something you're passionate

17:28

about and you can even start small

17:30

. I think it doesn't . I mean , our goal was starting

17:32

with just helping one family and

17:34

I think that's where it's more relatable . We're

17:37

not setting out I mean , hopefully we become this this

17:39

amazing , incredible , massive charity

17:41

, but really our goal was just start

17:44

really small and just helping that

17:46

one family achieve their dreams . And

17:48

so I think , don't underestimate your dreams

17:50

. Even if you have something small , I think

17:52

, go for it and lean into

17:54

your network and lean into support

17:57

people to help you along the way and

17:59

give it a shot . The worst that can

18:01

happen it doesn't , it doesn't work out , it doesn't

18:03

go as planned . At least you can say you gave

18:05

it a try and you're going to learn

18:07

so much along the way for it

18:10

, so don't let it hold you back .

18:12

Thank you for all of the amazing work that you do

18:14

in the world , the lives that you

18:17

are changing . I think this is a

18:19

really important year for elevating this conversation

18:21

and I'm so grateful that we were able to have it together

18:23

.

18:24

Thank you so much and thanks for letting me

18:26

come and talk about it and bring some awareness

18:29

to such an important topic .

18:31

Thank you for joining us . Don't forget to follow

18:33

us on Instagram and LinkedIn , where

18:35

we transform the wisdom from our podcast

18:37

into practical tips , tools and takeaways

18:39

for your leadership journey . Find

18:42

us at gritgracepodcast

18:44

. See you next week .