0:00

Are there any words more guaranteed to strike

0:02

terror into people's hearts than climate

0:04

comedy? Well, I thought so and then I

0:06

took my show spoilers to the Edinburgh Festival and

0:08

everyone bloody loved it, including Brian Eno,

0:11

if you can believe that. You can see it at the Soho

0:13

Theatre from the 29th of November for four

0:15

nights. Get your tickets at stuartgoldsmith.com.

0:20

Hello

0:30

and welcome to the show.

0:56

I'm Stuart Goldsmith

0:58

and today I'm very pleased and proud to be bringing

1:01

you this episode with the wonderful Eliza

1:03

Schlesinger. Now, Eliza was

1:05

relatively new to me. I think I ran into

1:07

her at Montreal many years ago and

1:10

she is someone who, if you didn't

1:12

know who she was, you felt like an idiot for it immediately

1:15

because she's got something like six Netflix

1:17

specials, she's been in movies,

1:20

she's had her own sketch show, she's just

1:22

one of those people who in the States is an absolutely

1:25

monolithic kind of star

1:28

really and I'm so thrilled that she

1:30

was able to spend some time with us for the Comedian's

1:32

Comedian. She is on her way to a

1:35

second night at the event in Apollo in London

1:37

which she's just added so don't miss out

1:39

on tickets for that. You can find them by googling

1:41

for them or by following various call to

1:43

actions in the show notes. I

1:46

really would highly recommend

1:48

seeing her live. The show that I particularly

1:50

paid attention to to revise for this

1:52

interview is called Hot Forever. It's

1:54

her most recent Netflix special and I

1:57

really, really recommend it. I will talk to

1:59

you.

1:59

and indeed to Eliza. You will hear me talking to

2:02

Eliza about that in more detail in

2:04

just a moment. But she is,

2:06

one of the things that I loved about her is she has such

2:08

a surprising physicality.

2:11

It's so exciting to see a comic engage

2:13

with like their particular skill

2:15

set and their particular passions and she has such a

2:17

passion and an instinct and

2:19

an expertise in really physical

2:22

act-outs. Not to mention how

2:24

staggeringly relatable her stuff is. Now I've

2:26

got an excellent episode in the can with one Josh

2:29

Pugh and we talk very specifically about

2:31

relatability and his kind of secret weapon of

2:33

knowing what he thinks

2:36

and what he perceives in relation to

2:38

an audience and I think there are kind of future echoes of

2:40

that in this conversation. I think you're

2:42

going to love it. Do not miss out

2:44

on getting tickets for her at the Apollo if you're going

2:46

to be in London. I think she's there in early December

2:48

the 8th I think but I will check

2:50

that now and apologize for it in the mid-roll if I got that

2:52

wrong. This is Eliza's lesson.

2:58

Welcome to the show. Eliza's

3:01

lesson guest. Great to have you. Stuart. Thanks

3:03

for having me Stuart.

3:04

I am a new fan of

3:06

yours by which I mean I think I saw

3:09

you. I saw you do like a tiny spot in Montreal

3:11

but like a long time ago. I'd never seen

3:13

one of your hours and in preparation for this I

3:16

watched Hot Forever which is one of six specials

3:18

that you have on Netflix. I'm telling you this is if you

3:20

don't know it and it's one of those

3:23

ones where I'm like oh my god it

3:25

blew my head off it's so good and

3:27

I just want to talk to you about I

3:30

suppose the point of this show really is to

3:32

talk to you about how it's that good and

3:34

why it's that good and the decisions that go into

3:37

it and all the rest of it because you're coming

3:39

to the the UK very soon you're coming

3:42

like back to the UK you've been before right?

3:44

I've been a couple times yeah I've played

3:47

all through the UK and London specifically

3:49

a couple times so I think this is my

3:52

third or fourth time coming back

3:54

to London. I think it's my second

3:56

time at the Eventim Apollo which I'm positive

3:59

I'm saying wrong. Yeah, I know it's

4:01

been I've had no idea how anyone

4:03

is supposed to pronounce that word I don't think we know I do so

4:05

I don't think I just it's always a it's

4:07

always a crapshoot coming from another country You're

4:09

like, I'm gonna do the authentic pronunciation like

4:12

the other day for some reason I kept pronouncing it Copenhagen

4:15

and I don't know why Because I know

4:17

it's Copenhagen and I've been there and

4:19

you start to get nervous that like you're gonna get

4:21

that 1dm from someone That's like actually it's

4:24

pronounced this way You rate

4:26

this piece of shit. It's just like I'm

4:28

that thing

4:29

I imagine from what

4:32

I know of you from your shows that that

4:34

kind of DM saying hey Actually,

4:36

you got this wrong wouldn't bother

4:39

you at all because what I see of you on

4:41

stage you are an astonishingly

4:44

powerful comic You

4:46

know like the whole thing like in terms

4:48

of the material has got this incredible

4:51

drive and speed and it's sort of big and

4:53

and And visual your act

4:55

outs are fantastic. Obviously, you're really known for that but

4:58

also the machinery of the the

5:00

stage show is Such like

5:03

I want to just talk about some of the decisions that

5:05

went into that because you are I feel

5:08

like I feel like You are by design

5:11

this kind of absolute train

5:13

of a performer that blasts in you

5:16

know big production values big show

5:18

bang and And so it's

5:20

fun seeing you without your war paint on and going Oh

5:23

Eliza a human being as opposed

5:25

to like this Incredibly powerful

5:27

Titan that we see on stage.

5:29

I appreciate that, you know, I

5:34

Yeah, I believe in putting on a show I

5:36

believe in show business I believe in

5:38

certain things like you don't meet people

5:40

before the show We're there to put

5:43

on a show for the allotted 90

5:43

minutes I take it very seriously

5:46

that people have spent money

5:48

and more importantly time

5:49

to come see me because I don't Do

5:52

that a lot. I don't often go and see things

5:54

probably because I'm working but I believe

5:57

people deserve a show and professionalism

5:59

and polish and not you up there being like,

6:01

what else? I don't know, I'll take some questions,

6:03

you know? And I think

6:05

my comedy lends itself to a big

6:07

energy, a big room, you know,

6:09

we just played a couple of arenas. I

6:12

can do a black box theater, but I love

6:14

the energy, I love movement,

6:17

and so, but I

6:18

also don't love

6:21

being held to anyone else's standards, so it

6:23

never occurs to me to put on makeup for podcasts.

6:26

I'm like, it's not even about being pregnant,

6:28

like I'm like, I just worked out, I'm in my own house,

6:30

like, the jig is up, she's not a supermodel,

6:33

gotcha. Oh well, what

6:35

are you gonna do? It's interesting because one

6:37

of the things that I have enjoyed

6:39

about

6:40

stand-up in my own career is

6:44

the fact that you could just be anyone.

6:46

Like, I sit, I think historically

6:48

I've sat on the other side of that, like, I

6:51

don't feel the need to put on a show because

6:53

I feel for me, part of what

6:55

I like is, I'm just one of us, and I just

6:57

happen to get up and speak, and there's

6:59

a sort of, it feels organic somehow.

7:02

Like, I'm not disagreeing with you, I'm interested that we

7:04

said that we could. No, you could disagree.

7:06

I wouldn't dare. It doesn't matter. No,

7:09

I'm also very big on like, hey, if that's how

7:11

you feel, like, what does it matter? We're not arguing

7:13

anything that serious, nor are we arguing,

7:16

but I think at a certain level,

7:18

you know, there's an everyman-ness to

7:20

stand-up, you know, you look at like the blue-collar guys,

7:24

and that relatability, and stand-up

7:26

at its core is about holding

7:28

up a mirror to society, but holding up a mirror

7:30

to yourself and saying, here's my

7:32

deep-dart secret, I bet you have the same one.

7:35

It's about relatability, you know, airline

7:38

food, traffic, going to the grocery store,

7:40

relationships, whatever, but

7:43

I think the more you elevate,

7:46

the more polished the art becomes, the

7:48

more polished you become. I

7:51

don't believe in dressing up for

7:53

shows. I believe in dressing up for a special

7:56

taping, but if you see me on tour,

7:58

this is utilitarian. endeavor. I'm

8:01

an extension of myself, which I believe your stand-up

8:04

should be that. I believe the types

8:06

of people who dress up for

8:08

stand-up would dress up for a local spot

8:10

as well. Not often. I

8:13

wear a lot of black. I wear a lot of black skinny

8:16

jeans. Sorry, Gen Z. I'm a millennial. I'm never

8:18

giving them up. I love

8:20

my black T-shirts. On tour, I wear that

8:23

because it's comfortable. It feels

8:25

like you're going into battle. You want to be dressed for

8:27

it. I don't want to be a different version of myself.

8:31

The show and the production are the polished

8:34

things. I do my hair and my makeup, but you're

8:36

never going to see me in a dress on

8:39

a Thursday in Philadelphia.

8:42

Talk to me about going into battle.

8:45

I mentioned War Paint a couple

8:47

of times, and I said the word Titan earlier on in a

8:49

moment of madness. You're

8:51

going into battle, and that's how

8:53

it feels.

8:56

I think the first show title

8:59

I heard of yours was Confirmed Kills. I was

9:01

like, whoa, that's a big...

9:04

Well, that is kind of aggressive, but

9:06

War Paint, I think, is aggressive. Talk

9:10

to me about how and why you

9:12

use that aggression. I have a pet theory

9:14

on it, but I'd

9:16

love to know what you see as that.

9:19

There is that through line

9:22

of aggression. For some of

9:24

them, it's really just those two, because there's freezing

9:26

hot, there's hot forever, there's

9:29

elder millennial. It's really just those

9:31

two. War Paint, we're referring to

9:33

the... Hour

9:36

is about commentary about how women

9:38

make themselves up for men. War Paint is really a reference

9:40

to makeup, and Confirmed Kills is a

9:42

joke about how diminutive

9:45

we see our grandparents, but it's like the guy

9:48

you call Pip-Hop actually has 53 Confirmed

9:50

Kills from World War

9:53

II. There is an aggression to

9:57

my performance, and

9:59

it's just... just the type of performer

10:01

I am. You know, this tour is called the Hard Feelings

10:04

Tour because everyone's like, oh, I said what

10:06

I said, no hard feelings. And I'm like, no rock

10:09

hard feelings. I meant it. I think

10:11

as women too much were forced to equivocate

10:14

and tamp down what we're saying and

10:16

I don't think there's anything wrong with saying even

10:18

if what you're saying is a silly take, self-deprecating,

10:22

whatever it is whimsical still

10:25

say what you mean and stand by it. I don't

10:27

believe in being like I was drunk

10:29

when I said it or I'm, you know,

10:31

I'm up here drinking. I think sometimes

10:34

we

10:36

want women to be drunk. So

10:38

we give them the license to like be sassy

10:41

and say that thing. Like you think about the Real Housewives,

10:43

you know, and that's just,

10:46

I'm like, if you're going to say it, mean it. And especially

10:48

as a comic, especially when the stakes are this high, we

10:50

all make mistakes. We will all say things that you're like,

10:53

yeah, that's, I shouldn't have said that or

10:55

I don't love that joke. You're allowed to make mistakes

10:57

as an artist, but especially

11:00

at this level with the amount of hours I've done

11:03

or that one has done saying, standing

11:06

behind what you posit and substantiating

11:08

it with concrete examples, you

11:11

know, you're giving a lecture. You're trying to explain

11:13

why things are the way they are, at least in my stand-up

11:16

and so there's an aggression there because

11:19

I'm not an aggressive

11:21

person, but I, there's a toughness

11:24

that I,

11:25

some, I mean, women contain multitudes. So sometimes

11:28

I'm very tough. Sometimes it's very soft. Sometimes

11:30

it's a cute animal. And I think we

11:32

have a right to explore that. Sometimes you feel

11:34

tough. Sometimes you feel like

11:36

a ball of laundry with no makeup on

11:38

and all of those are okay.

11:40

Something that really like

11:43

some of the best stuff of yours that

11:45

I've seen, one of the, one of the tools

11:47

you wield most kind of adeptly

11:50

is when you're talking

11:53

about the situation

11:55

of, of women. You know, the situation that the

11:57

expectations placed upon women. There's the,

12:00

I think in Hot Forever, and I'll refer to that

12:02

a lot because I've watched it recently and I was really

12:04

so blown away by it, but the...

12:08

almost like the softening up around about the ugly

12:10

bra routine, when it's kind

12:12

of silly, and I will

12:14

talk about your daftness as well, which I really enjoy

12:16

and we'll get into that, but by that point

12:19

in the hour of the Netflix special, and maybe

12:21

you sort of shot for longer than that, the show is longer, but

12:25

when it gets to the ugly bra routine, you're starting to

12:27

merge the silliness with kind of real

12:30

genuine social commentary, not just kind of

12:32

relatable stuff, but really opinionated

12:34

stuff, things about like submarine

12:37

sonarring other women and

12:40

the stuff you do about glitter speak, and

12:42

then it gets... it kind of gets really serious in

12:44

the last 20 minutes, out of being serious, it's very funny, but

12:46

like you really clearly passionately... No, it's pretty

12:48

serious. Yeah,

12:51

some of it's serious. So I

12:53

suppose my question is, to what extent

12:55

does that reflect your observation

12:58

about the state of femininity

13:01

or the state of being a woman in society

13:03

now, and to what extent does it reflect

13:06

your own experience of being downtrodden

13:09

or misinterpreted,

13:12

told to shut up, those kind of things? Because I think

13:15

like you speak so relatable about those

13:18

situations, but at

13:20

the same time, you're doing it from such a powerful

13:22

position, it's hard to imagine

13:25

you, the character of Eliza, being on the

13:27

receiving end of that.

13:28

Oh, that's interesting. You

13:30

know, obviously comedy always comes from...

13:32

and I appreciate all those words, so thank you. Comedy

13:35

always comes from an authentic place and from a place

13:37

of experience, but just because I'm

13:39

having my one experience doesn't mean I haven't

13:42

taken into account the experiences

13:45

that other women have largely talked about.

13:48

And so it is...

13:50

it's a combination of the way I feel,

13:52

but me also taking a temperature over

13:54

years and years, and now of course we have social media

13:56

that you can include in your research, of just

13:59

the way that women... feel. And so while

14:01

I may not relate to something specifically, it's

14:03

always about that kernel of relatability, which

14:06

is women just like need a fucking

14:08

break. And so this is me

14:11

because I don't feel no one's ever told

14:13

me to sit down. My parents never said

14:15

I wasn't good enough. I've always

14:18

been, I've always felt emboldened

14:20

to say what I needed to say. It's never occurred to

14:23

me to temper it. So I

14:25

will say these things because there are people

14:27

who can't because I don't

14:29

think of it that way. I don't think like I'm going

14:31

to do it for you guys. I'm like, I'm going to say the thing that

14:33

we're all thinking, right? Right? Aren't we

14:35

all thinking this? And I'm always amazed

14:38

that people like, yeah, I just didn't know I could say it. I'm like, what

14:40

do you mean you didn't know you could say it? Part

14:43

of that is being American. Part of it is being

14:45

Jewish. Part of it is being a woman who

14:47

just never saw herself

14:49

as any different from the guys.

14:52

Just never occurred to me. And

14:55

so the way that I

14:57

say these things, it's me taking

14:59

the essence of what

15:02

I feel and sort of combining it

15:04

with the way that I know a lot of women feel because

15:06

I listen to them because we all feel

15:08

the same deep down. You don't, some of us feel

15:10

more oppressed or upset than others. Some of us

15:12

have more privilege than others, but at the end

15:14

of the day, we all want a break. And

15:18

I feel like you had another

15:18

part of that question, which was a nuanced question,

15:21

but

15:22

I thought I hope that's the answer. Yeah,

15:24

I think so. I think it's

15:26

clear as well. I think I missed something. I

15:31

think the question was about the relationship

15:35

between your actual life circumstances and

15:37

the Oh,

15:39

yeah, I mean, I

15:43

think a big part of the skill of stand

15:45

up is realizing the

15:47

thing that you're thinking

15:49

is the

15:50

meat of the joke

15:51

and not dismissing the fact

15:54

that you felt a certain way or thought a

15:56

certain way. People

15:58

listen to stand up because what you're saying

16:00

is either so crazy that

16:03

it's never occurred to them, or

16:05

it's so relatable and they're like, oh wow, I

16:07

see myself in that. And

16:10

so it's just about having the wherewithal

16:12

to write down that thought you just had.

16:15

And I never think of myself as so exceptional

16:18

that the thoughts I'm having are so unique no one's ever

16:20

had them. It's the opposite. I think

16:22

I'm just like every other girl and

16:25

my talent happens to line the fact that I pluck

16:27

out what we're all thinking and

16:30

I just say it.

16:31

That's so well put.

16:33

You might have noticed me go, oh yeah,

16:35

I'm gonna make a little note on that bit. Fucking draw a

16:37

ring around that. That is one of the big secrets, right?

16:40

That's one of the big secrets of stand up. It's one of the

16:42

big secrets of your stand up. When did

16:44

you learn that? Do you remember, was that like a

16:46

kind of light bulb moment where you went, oh hang on

16:48

a minute, I just have to say that bit.

16:51

It's an ongoing

16:52

practice,

16:54

like mindfulness, which I'm not even sure what

16:56

that is still, or meditation,

16:58

or taking a beat. I

17:00

will talk to other comics, I think, are very

17:03

funny and we'll be talking and they'll say something

17:05

and I'll be like, you should write that down. And they'll be like, really?

17:07

I'm like, write that down. Because

17:10

sometimes you don't realize that when you are a genuinely

17:12

funny person who is genuinely talented

17:14

at being funny, you

17:16

don't think everything that you're saying is gold.

17:19

You're just speaking. And it breaks my

17:21

heart when people are be like, are you doing bits right

17:23

now? And I'm like, no, I'm actually this funny.

17:26

This is what you get. If

17:28

you heard Ariana Grande humming to herself,

17:30

you wouldn't be like, are you trying to write a song

17:33

right now? It's like, no, she just does that. That's

17:36

what she's saying. I'm comparing myself to my greatest competition,

17:38

Ariana Grande. It's always she and I.

17:41

I think

17:42

the seminal moment was sort of when

17:45

I started doing stand up and it wasn't

17:47

quite stand up. And I always feel

17:49

weird telling this story because it is so unrelatable,

17:52

but it's still my story. When

17:54

I was in college, I was in a sketch

17:56

troop, which is not stand

17:58

up. And then I did a one.

17:59

show, which everyone does. I did

18:02

not show my boobs, so I guess

18:04

it wasn't that

18:05

arthouse. And then I

18:07

did a semester at C, which

18:10

is a program here in the states where

18:12

you board a ship with like 600 other

18:14

students from all these different schools and you go around

18:17

the world and you stop in all these countries and

18:19

you take classes. And luckily my college

18:21

just made me do pass-fail because I didn't

18:24

want to take a political science class, but I did. And

18:27

you go around and every week they would do like

18:30

a coffee house, like an open mic. So kids

18:32

come and they read their poetry or they

18:34

do a dance. And I had

18:36

noticed, I had started just

18:38

kind of observing the way boys and girls

18:40

were interacting with each other. It was my

18:43

first time really being around

18:46

sorority girls and frat guys

18:48

and watching the interactions. And

18:51

I noticed that there would be these really beautiful

18:53

girls, hot girls,

18:55

whatever, who would try so

18:58

hard to get the attention of these good

19:00

looking guys. And the guys

19:02

are just like,

19:03

oh no, I guess you can come in. And the girls would

19:04

try everything and I thought that there was something very

19:07

funny about that and I was merely

19:09

an observer. I didn't count myself

19:10

as one of those girls. I

19:12

was more friends with these guys because

19:15

I was funny, so I had this advantage

19:17

of being on their side watching

19:20

the girls try to come in and sleep

19:22

with them and get their attention. And

19:24

I knew what that felt like. I know what that

19:26

feels like to be the girl, like just doing

19:29

anything you can to get the guys attention,

19:31

dropping by a dorm room, making up an excuse.

19:34

Oh, I accidentally called you. All this bullshit

19:37

that every generation has and there's different iterations

19:39

of it. And so I talked about

19:41

it on stage and that was the beginning of

19:43

me realizing that these observations and all

19:46

the things I've been observing my whole life had come, had

19:48

culminated in this male-female

19:50

observation and that's

19:52

a huge bedrock of my stand-up.

19:55

Yes, that is absolutely

19:58

bewildering. I've never even heard of a semester. at

20:00

sea. So as

20:02

an origin story for a comedian, the

20:05

fact that you, so you had done a one-person show

20:08

but it, and it was funny, it

20:10

was like a sketch, kind of post-sketch troop

20:12

one.

20:13

Yeah, I think, you know, it's college, it's your last

20:15

year there, you get a chance, I went to a liberal arts college

20:18

and so you're cobbling together

20:21

the little sketches you've written, the little monologues

20:23

you've written yourself, like

20:25

a little one-man show. I couldn't tell you what it was about,

20:28

I would show a couple of videos that I had

20:30

filmed that were funny, so it was

20:32

funny. It was not like the

20:34

reckoning of an upbringing in the south,

20:36

a letter to my father, like it was,

20:39

it was funny. You had some experience

20:41

and some confidence at performing material

20:43

you'd written and

20:45

that presumably then kind of fed

20:47

into when you realize, oh hang on,

20:49

in this kind of coffee house type

20:51

gig, you can, like

20:53

how much writing did you do before that

20:56

or did you think, I think I've noticed

20:58

some stuff and I'll just go on and wing it and talk about the

21:00

stuff. Because that, approaching that moment that

21:02

we discussed before where you go, oh all you need

21:04

to do is just say the stuff.

21:07

Right, so the first time I got up, I don't

21:09

remember all that I talked about, but I definitely

21:13

pulled bits from the one-man

21:16

show because you had to fill,

21:18

whatever it was, five minutes and then

21:20

I probably had some connective tissue

21:23

to make it about the ship. I'm

21:25

sure someone has like a grainy clip of it somewhere

21:28

and then that morphed into the next time I did

21:30

it making it about just the community,

21:32

like what's going on, the food on the ship, the

21:36

maintenance issues, the other students,

21:39

how it felt like just commentary

21:42

on our collective experience as

21:45

a group. And I think in a way, being

21:47

the one making the commentary

21:50

about what

21:52

we're all feeling in this small group

21:55

has sort of informed the way that I

21:57

desperately want to always

21:59

be a

22:00

voice of my generation,

22:03

voicing how we feel, voicing

22:06

women, because as an artist,

22:08

I so

22:10

dearly want to be seen and

22:12

heard. Like at its core, this

22:15

comes from wanting to be heard and

22:18

wanting to have said something

22:20

that was impactful and even

22:23

deeper than that, I think it comes down to

22:25

wanting an explanation for why

22:28

things are the way they are. And

22:31

so I'm not a sociologist and I'm not

22:33

a scientist and I can't explain everything

22:36

about the world but I can explain my tiny corner

22:39

and I can deep dive into socio-scientific

22:42

reasons why women, why you are wearing that

22:44

makeup, why you are wearing that lipstick, why

22:47

you are wearing those high heels, because I think we do

22:49

these things, we go through these machinations

22:51

of femininity and

22:53

of modern society without

22:55

realizing why we're

22:56

doing what we're doing.

22:57

You don't realize why

22:59

you want that guy so badly. You don't realize why

23:02

he doesn't want you and it all comes down

23:04

to science and I think if you can explain it, it

23:06

makes me feel a little bit more sane and

23:09

it gives it legitimacy versus

23:11

just making a joke about a hand job. Like

23:13

Bob, what's the science behind the want to do

23:15

a hand

23:16

job?

23:19

And do you have any, do you have like a

23:21

pet theory as to why

23:24

that search for the why is so important

23:27

to you?

23:28

Yeah I think I

23:32

mean as far back as I can remember, I feel

23:35

like the beginning of Goodfellas, like all my life I wanted

23:37

to be a dancer. I feel like the beginning of your one person show.

23:39

That's my favorite movie.

23:42

I just always felt like everyone, people

23:44

in charge were stupid. I was

23:47

never disruptive in class but

23:49

you get a pretty good sense

23:51

and maybe it's because my parents are New Yorkers and I

23:53

am from Texas

23:55

where

23:57

it's not, you know, you don't really call things

23:59

out especially like as I was growing up the

24:01

way you would in New York, but there was always this sort

24:03

of scrutiny and I'd always be like I think I don't

24:06

know. I don't know. I don't know why that girl's

24:08

popular. I think she's dumb. I

24:10

don't know why that guy's popular. He's not good looking like what

24:12

are we doing? I'm the person, I mean

24:14

it's not that I don't have sheet mentality sometimes, but I've

24:16

always been like what are we doing? Why that? And

24:20

maybe the why that always came from why

24:22

them not me or a frustration

24:25

I'm not good at this therefore I think you're dumb.

24:27

I don't like the way you're doing this. A lot of

24:29

critiques on stuff. And

24:32

maybe part of it's being Jewish. You know we're a culture

24:35

that asks a lot of questions. It's

24:38

sort of inculcated into the

24:40

ethos of Judaism that we

24:43

ask.

24:47

And so and maybe from deep down as

24:49

a kid just wondering how come those kids got

24:51

that and I didn't you

24:53

know and

24:53

maybe that informs just this inquisitiveness

24:56

and it's weird because my daughter's incredibly inquisitive.

24:59

But I think as a type of comic

25:02

that I am and I think I might be in my

25:04

own sort of lane on that but desperately

25:07

wanting to be informed about the behaviors

25:09

that rule my life because

25:12

then it makes you feel a little less

25:14

crazy right.

25:17

Do you feel that having

25:20

a kind of baseline attitude of

25:23

why them not me that

25:26

you might say if someone was experiencing that

25:29

that a great job for them to

25:31

go into wouldn't necessarily be the comedy

25:33

industry in which you

25:35

have the opportunity to think why them not

25:37

me about everyone all the time.

25:40

It's the perfect job for you because

25:42

show business has no rules and

25:45

the answer is why them not

25:47

me. The answer is it can be you

25:50

just

25:51

put a little bit of luck in your pocket do some

25:53

work and think cross your fingers. You

25:55

know you

25:57

look at actors and actresses and entertainers

26:00

all the time you're like what's so special about that person?

26:02

The answer is

26:03

not nothing, there's something

26:06

or what's special about them is that they are the everyman.

26:09

I mean there is something special. If you're going to be successful

26:11

in show business whether it was

26:13

hard work,

26:15

whether it's that you're beautiful, whether it's

26:17

a talent, like there is something. Nobody

26:19

is famous, genuinely famous.

26:22

You can be a celebrity but like genuinely

26:24

famous for being talented when you're not. Even your

26:26

favorite singer if you think they suck, I promise you

26:28

they are exceptionally talented. They just

26:30

aren't singing the songs that you want to hear. And

26:34

that's what's

26:36

also heartbreaking

26:38

about show business is because the answer is sometimes it's

26:40

just not you, just because it isn't.

26:42

Just because it ain't.

26:43

But you do have the opportunities

26:46

to create

26:47

opportunities for yourself

26:49

which is something I have to keep reminding myself every day

26:51

because it's a gauntlet.

26:55

But I also sometimes I'm just like why not me?

26:59

Because it can't be them so I want it to be me.

27:02

I'm not gonna not do this audition. Why should

27:04

they get it? Just because I didn't try. Sometimes

27:07

you get rewarded for it more often than not

27:08

you don't but

27:11

stand up and entertainment. Stand up in particular

27:13

is great because

27:16

you really can create your own magic. In

27:19

acting you have to have so many people

27:21

agreeing on you. A producer,

27:24

a director, a casting like they've all you got to go through audition.

27:26

They've all got to decide. The network, the studio.

27:29

Stand up you just need sometimes in

27:31

some cases not even a microphone but just an audience

27:35

and you need their attention for a minute.

27:37

And you can create an act

27:40

and then you can take that act and you can do it somewhere

27:42

else and you can become so good at

27:44

this if you just put in the work and have

27:46

some of the talent. And

27:49

it's not like sports where it's

27:51

super black and white. Comedy is more nuanced.

27:53

You can be marginally funny

27:56

and still be wildly successful. You

27:59

know there's a lot of great

28:01

It's show business. It's brutal.

28:04

And any time I complain about it, there's

28:06

no solace in an explanation. There's

28:08

my agent or my manager's just like, yeah,

28:10

it's fucking hard. Like we're all just like

28:12

this. I don't know how anything gets

28:15

made

28:16

because it's you're so it's

28:18

so subjective and you're

28:20

subjected to did they

28:22

want to read it? Was it the right

28:24

executive on the right day? Does it fit their

28:26

mandate? Like you just there's so

28:28

many variables. Are you

28:30

famous? Well, did you package it enough?

28:33

You did stand up. Did you know the right people? You

28:35

know, sometimes being funny and being talented

28:38

isn't enough. You

28:40

need the right people around you. I mean, that's why so

28:42

many people who are successful at

28:44

one point sort of fade away because they didn't have

28:46

the right team. You know, it's just such

28:48

an alchemy and

28:51

it is choosing to

28:53

continue to push yourself.

28:56

For me, that looks like I get up multiple

28:58

times a week when I'm at home

29:01

in between cities when I'm on tour. I

29:04

don't write like physically like I don't write

29:07

my jokes down. They're all in my head. So

29:09

I'm constantly getting up and doing 15,

29:12

20 minute spots around town as a way of polishing. And

29:14

then I just go back on the road. Some

29:17

comics tour perennially. You

29:20

know, for some people, it's taking that acting

29:23

class, not getting the gig, auditioning for

29:25

the same casting director, sometimes for

29:27

your friends who have a project

29:29

that you can have, and it is just choosing to never

29:31

give up. And sometimes you do.

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30:11

You say you'll never join the Navy. That

30:14

you'd never track storms brewing in the Atlantic.

30:19

And skydiving could never be part

30:21

of your commute. You'd

30:23

never climb Mount Fuji on a port

30:25

visit. Joining

30:31

the Navy

30:32

sounds crazy. Saying never actually

30:35

is. Start your journey at Navy.com.

30:38

America's Navy forged by the sea.

30:43

Like there have been times that I'm just like, well,

30:46

I guess I'll just die. And

30:48

then after you kind of like lick your wounds for a day,

30:51

you're like, I got to get back in there because I

30:53

have, I got to pay this mortgage.

30:56

But always, I'm

30:58

so grateful for standup because if I didn't

31:00

have standup, I would just be an actress that booked like two

31:03

things ever. And so,

31:05

and it is the best job in the world, but it is even,

31:08

even the best job in the world. It's still a gauntlet. Like

31:10

me touring is, it's

31:12

difficult. Like it's, you

31:15

know, because the airline industry is such a mess. I take

31:17

the earliest flight out. So you're exhausted.

31:20

You get to the hotel, you have a few hours,

31:22

you go to the venue. I mean, my time at a venue

31:25

is, it's

31:25

a rigorous,

31:27

it is like get there, hair and makeup, take

31:29

the Polaroids that we sell up front, put them in

31:31

the thing. I always check merch to make sure it looks

31:34

good. I have to sign like 175 posters

31:37

for our VIPs. I do an hour, then

31:39

I do an hour plus meet and greet. Then

31:41

we start the second

31:42

show. Then

31:43

you're in bed. I, my fans, this is great.

31:45

My fans give me a lot of gifts. So I go through

31:47

every single gift and I tag every single

31:49

fan. Like it's just the way that I choose to

31:52

operate. And then you get on a plane the next day. You just

31:55

hope you don't get fucking bronchitis

31:57

from the person sitting next to you. And

32:00

then you come home and

32:02

you leave 3,000 people

32:04

screaming your name, people that get your name tattooed

32:07

on them, people crying when they meet you, and

32:09

you put yourself on tape for a bit

32:11

part in an ensemble movie, and

32:14

they don't call you back.

32:18

So this is Eliza, and it's the...

32:20

I did get it right, it is the 8th, it's the 6th

32:23

as well, but I think the 6th has sold out. But find

32:25

out more about her at... I mean, I'm going to guess

32:27

it's ElizaSchlesinger.com, I shouldn't need to

32:29

guess at this stage. Let's go with ElizaSchlesinger.com

32:33

as I frantically Google...

32:35

It's Eliza.com! Of course it's Eliza.com,

32:38

you don't get to be a megastar without an instantly

32:40

recognisable first name. And so

32:42

this is Eliza, she's great. She's

32:46

so smart and

32:48

funny and generous with her time,

32:51

and really is a thinker. We're

32:53

going to talk about... I didn't even... Normally

32:56

I will tell you what the show's going to be about in the interim,

32:58

but I didn't. The stuff that we haven't currently

33:01

covered are the... We're

33:03

going to talk a little bit about the special

33:05

skill, really, that underpins her relationship to

33:07

her audience and her relatability. We're

33:10

also going to talk about her empathy and her

33:12

increasing focus on material that's meaning

33:14

to her, and we'll find out why she often

33:16

ends up as a witch. There's two in particular

33:18

moments that we talk about, really daft

33:21

little moments, like physical

33:23

comedy moments, where you can see she's making herself laugh

33:26

in the special that we're discussing here, and they

33:28

are a joy to watch and a joy to talk to her about.

33:30

So more from Eliza in just a second. She's

33:33

on at the SIC, although I believe it's sold out, on the 8th

33:35

of December at the event of Apollo in London.

33:38

And, I mean, do people still call it

33:40

the Hammersmith Apollo? It barely matters. You

33:42

know what it is. So get along and see that. There's

33:45

more, there's more from Eliza. We're going to talk

33:48

in the Insiders Club about the power in being

33:50

quiet. We're going to find out her internal

33:52

monologue on a movie set. That's fascinating.

33:55

And we're going to talk about how she manages friendships

33:57

with her extraordinary work ethic and business.

34:00

life and family life and everything else and I think

34:02

that's something I don't know is that a preconception?

34:06

Well it's not the word a pre... oh god, it is again,

34:08

I can never remember the word. A preoccupation

34:11

of mine perhaps, perhaps it is, but

34:13

I love hearing how incredibly busy

34:15

and successful people manage to stay friends

34:17

with everyone when they're not feeding the beast of their

34:20

workaholism. So all of that and more

34:22

in the Insiders Club go to comedianscomedia.com

34:25

slash insiders to get hold of ad-free

34:27

episodes, extra content from every show that has it

34:29

and much much more. Let's get back

34:31

to Eliza in just a second but first of course

34:34

my Soho shows are coming out. I think

34:36

there's just time, I think this is going to come out when there's one

34:39

or two nights left but if you haven't been to see me at

34:41

the Soho Theatre yet please do so now,

34:43

I'm there until the 2nd of December, so

34:45

29th, 30th of November, 1st and 2nd

34:47

of December. I hope you get the chance to come along

34:49

and see Spoilers, it's a climate comedy

34:52

show that won't make you feel sad and what

34:54

more can we ask for than that? Let's get back

34:56

to this conversation with Eliza Schlesinger.

35:01

When

35:05

you're, just to come back to your live stand-up,

35:07

the journey that you take the audience on

35:09

is not solely one of comedy

35:11

and it's not solely one of

35:14

kind of

35:15

softening them up in order to receive

35:18

the message, like the real message of the show, like

35:20

there is, with the show Hot Forever there are

35:22

several moments in the first half an hour where

35:25

people, predominantly women in the crowd are

35:28

cheering and you're getting kind of like applause

35:31

as well as laughs, you know moments which are like, I'm

35:33

ready for the roof kind of moments and then it becomes more

35:35

nuanced and it becomes more finessed and you are

35:37

saying things which are more

35:40

meaningful and get even bigger reactions. I

35:43

also think it's really interesting how

35:46

you make sure that

35:49

you bring the whole room with you, not just

35:51

in when you're, like you've got lovely, those

35:54

lovely little moments where you're like, not you

35:56

men, not anyone in this room, but

35:58

also this. Like, I'm

36:00

not just saying that from the perspective of a man going, Oh,

36:02

this is nice. Eliza's sort of allowed me into

36:04

it. You don't want to feel bad. Well, yeah. But

36:07

you also, the way you described it just a moment

36:09

ago is like that really

36:11

is your, your, your shows are really

36:13

suffused with that. Because you

36:15

are making sure all the while that

36:18

you say to people, you have a voice,

36:20

you are empowered, you know, you

36:22

have felt like this and you don't deserve to feel like

36:25

that. And it's just fascinating

36:27

to me that you managed to couch that in,

36:30

in such like really

36:32

rock hard premises, really finessed

36:35

act outs, really like ringing every possible

36:38

tag out of a subject. And all

36:40

the way you are extending a hand

36:42

and saying, come on, come on, we can do this, we can do

36:45

it together. Rather than, as I had assumed

36:47

when I think when I first heard of you and I saw the title Confirmed

36:49

Kills, I was like, oh, roast comic. I

36:52

mean, like you're going to come out there, bang, bang, bang, you know,

36:54

whereas it's much warmer

36:57

than that, but it is the

36:59

warmth is expressed from a position of kind

37:01

of absolute authority and absolute control.

37:05

I remember they

37:07

used to call Don Rickles Mr. Warmth, which I

37:09

always thought was funny because there's, there's

37:10

something there. There's a love there

37:14

in making fun of people.

37:15

I,

37:17

what you're talking about is a term

37:19

that my team and I have had for a while

37:21

in a lot of projects and I call it digestible feminism

37:24

because I know how my

37:27

ears turn off when someone who isn't

37:29

like me lumps me in

37:31

with a you people or says all

37:33

women do this. All of your kind

37:35

of people do this. You don't want to hear it. If somebody

37:39

comes in hot, you already,

37:42

it's already an uphill battle and I don't

37:44

believe women are a monolith.

37:46

I don't believe men are a monolith.

37:49

I see myself as equal to men. So

37:51

I'm not coming from a place of anger

37:54

toward men. I'm coming from a place of disappointment

37:58

and righteous indignation at. everything,

38:01

I often have no side and if

38:03

you think I'm on your

38:04

side, I'm very quick to switch to the other side,

38:07

maybe because nobody sat with me at lunch in middle school, but

38:11

I am an island. I have

38:13

no country and so I'm

38:15

always arguing sort of and standing up for both

38:17

sides and by that you know talking about like bringing

38:20

in men because you bought a ticket,

38:23

you spent your money to come see me, why

38:25

would I want to make you feel bad?

38:28

I think sometimes performers you know

38:30

you get on the soapbox and you forget that

38:32

there might be people in your audience that

38:34

don't agree with you all the way so you got to give

38:36

them something, some grace

38:39

to be like that's okay if you don't think

38:41

that and here's what you might think

38:43

and it is a huge compliment I get. I'll get people

38:45

both sides

38:48

of a socio-political aisle or people

38:50

who are not like me in whether

38:52

it's economic status both ways, color,

38:55

gender, whatever it is that say I don't

38:59

always agree with you

39:01

but I really like your comedy

39:03

and I think that that's incredibly powerful and

39:05

nuance and these shades of gray are something

39:07

that we completely lack in

39:10

our society and online.

39:13

You know this is a Gen Z is a contextless

39:15

society and social media is a

39:18

soundbite based currency

39:20

and people

39:23

just read headlines and so

39:25

I got you in there for an hour. I'm gonna

39:27

broach a topic that I deeply

39:29

believe in but I will substantiate

39:32

it with valid points

39:34

while wrapping my

39:36

heart to swallow stuff

39:37

in sugar

39:38

because at the end of the day it is a stand-up

39:40

comedy show. I

39:41

am not there to do a lecture, I'm not

39:43

you know

39:44

on a circuit. You want to

39:46

bring people in and that's how you get them

39:48

to listen.

39:50

What strikes me is that it's

39:53

incredibly successful at doing precisely

39:56

that because it's hard

39:58

to imagine you know like someone

40:00

who is the opposite of a Fox News viewer

40:03

is never going to change their mind on the output

40:05

of Fox News or vice versa. Do you know what I mean? People, that's

40:08

the conversation, isn't it? I do a lot of comedy

40:10

about the climate at the moment and one of the things

40:12

you quickly realise is you can't

40:14

change, you know, to change someone's

40:17

mind is like, oh god, how do I actually contact

40:19

someone to kind of change their mind?

40:22

What will make people change their minds is

40:24

not, you know, the kind of TV

40:27

shows and news and David Attenborough for us

40:29

or what have you, but it's about the

40:31

really,

40:31

I feel like David's helping.

40:32

David is helping. David is helping. But

40:34

what will really change

40:37

people's minds are their friends and their family members

40:39

talking to them. And I think gently

40:42

you managed to cut across that with your comedy

40:44

because you absolutely can. It becomes

40:47

sufficiently digestible. I think that's fascinating. You call

40:49

it digestible.

40:51

I appreciate that. I mean, look, you

40:53

live in whatever rural

40:56

Oklahoma and you have like a

40:58

husband who like loves Donald Trump and he's like salt

41:01

of the earth, whatever. There's still

41:03

merit to that person. And I have that

41:05

perspective being a liberal

41:07

person. I live in Los Angeles, but I am from

41:09

Texas. So, and I've had

41:11

the pleasure of touring

41:14

my country extensively. So I

41:16

have a working understanding and

41:18

knowledge of the rest of this country. Yes, I

41:20

go to these big cities, but

41:23

you get this chance, this context

41:25

to see that just because someone lives in a red state

41:27

doesn't mean that they're bad.

41:30

Doesn't mean that they're other. Doesn't

41:33

mean that they're worse than you. You know,

41:35

I remember I was

41:38

on a movie set and I had to be transported

41:41

from one city to another. We were in the deep South and

41:43

the guy who was driving me, you

41:45

know, he's got the backward hat with

41:48

the weird version of the American flag

41:50

that you know is like a right to bear

41:53

arms, AK 47 blue

41:55

lives matter, whatever you could

41:57

tell by what he was wearing and he's got a shirt that has

41:59

like.

41:59

I don't know if you guys have this, like that vague constitution

42:02

type writing on it, something

42:04

about guaranteed rights, like just that

42:06

type of American.

42:08

But he was nice,

42:09

right, because they always say

42:11

views of old, heart of gold, heart of gold views

42:13

of old, meaning like

42:14

if you're nice in the South, chances are you don't believe

42:17

in voter suppression. And

42:19

we're just having a chat, and I

42:21

of course bring up abortion rights because he

42:24

has three daughters and this was right after the overturning

42:26

of Roe v. Wade.

42:26

Having a civil

42:28

life, not wanting to be mad, just kind of

42:30

wanting to talk to him. And

42:32

the car broke down. And I think he was

42:35

former military and I do a lot

42:36

of work with the military, so I have a soft spot

42:38

in my heart for these types of people that

42:40

I guess are men and women in the military and

42:44

didn't even hesitate. Got out, took his

42:46

knife out, jacked up the car, like changed

42:49

that tire so quickly. And

42:52

I know this, it sounds dumb, like oh my

42:54

God, he changed a tire. But I don't

42:56

know how to change a tire. I don't know

42:58

that all of my male friends do,

43:00

maybe they do, maybe they don't, but he knew a lot

43:03

about the car. It was beyond just the tire. And

43:07

it was just that thing, I'm like wow, you and I are

43:09

not the same, we were not raised the same, we probably

43:11

don't have the same values, but there's

43:14

a value to people who

43:16

are different than us, having a different skill

43:19

set. And I really respect

43:21

that. I really fucking

43:22

respect

43:24

that we might not agree politically. I can't

43:27

respect

43:27

that you

43:29

believe your rights are more important than you know

43:31

what I should do with my body or your right to carry an

43:34

automatic weapon into a public place. But

43:38

I don't think that people have enough context

43:40

about other people. So when I look out

43:42

into my audience,

43:44

I feel privileged that I have

43:46

all of the girls that look just like me,

43:48

all of the girls that don't look like me, all

43:51

of the men who are opposite from my husband,

43:53

older people, young people. It's

43:56

not the most diverse audience, I'm not trying

43:58

to pretend it's that. to

44:01

get people from different sides of a political

44:03

spectrum and from different generations that come to

44:05

the show because they feel I'm speaking to them,

44:08

it's a privilege and I don't take it

44:10

lightly. So I always want to make sure I'm honoring

44:12

exactly what I want to say and that you don't

44:15

feel bad for having purchased a ticket.

44:17

What are your

44:19

superpowers as a comic and what

44:21

are your weaknesses?

44:23

Oh, okay.

44:30

I'm very quick,

44:35

quick to digest information and

44:37

deduce what that means from that

44:40

versus just a quick comeback. I'm

44:43

good at being incisive and I'm good at, for

44:48

some reason in my mind it was just when it comes to crowd work,

44:50

I'm good at synthesizing.

44:53

And putting into relatable terms

44:56

of feeling that we all have. So

45:00

those are superpowers,

45:03

otherwise known as talent

45:05

and my weaknesses.

45:08

Sometimes I'm too fast.

45:12

Sometimes I listen to myself and I'm like, oh my God,

45:14

slow down. And I've

45:16

tried to. It's like a lifelong note.

45:23

And maybe I tend to think about things through the same

45:25

lens and

45:25

prism just because that's how I think. But I don't know if

45:29

there's any

45:30

weaknesses as much as just different

45:33

because I don't look at

45:36

any other comics and say like, oh, I wish

45:38

I

45:39

was that.

45:42

So

45:44

I'm not a great listener.

45:47

I think going too fast.

45:49

And that's just in

45:50

general. I

45:53

realize if you just slowed

45:55

down

45:55

the way you spoke, you could have two hour specials

45:57

out of the one. Like if you just gave

45:59

them a little bit of a break. less but

46:01

I can't.

46:02

Do you recognize any

46:05

just that thing about the same lens that

46:07

you said do you recognize kind of rhythms

46:09

or habits in your comedy

46:12

and if you do recognize them do

46:15

you think that they are things to be

46:18

shaken up and kind of broken

46:20

apart and new discoveries to be made or

46:22

do you see them as oh I'm honing that.

46:27

I think

46:28

it works itself out if

46:30

I am thinking of this in terms of men and women

46:32

it's because there's something to be

46:34

thought about there it's not like and it

46:36

works and it is the way that I think and

46:38

it is a digestible

46:40

way to examine society

46:43

because everything does come down to I'm not a comic

46:45

that talks about sex a ton but everything

46:47

does come down most things come down to that

46:50

to a biology. Wait

46:54

I had something else oh

46:56

yeah I love like

46:58

my act is

46:59

they've got some poignant moments there's some

47:02

serious moments obviously it's funny

47:04

but then there's also like a whimsical element

47:07

I tend to always put my body in the same

47:10

shape I tend to like hunch over it's a lot

47:12

of hunching

47:16

because to me like maybe it's like this just

47:18

from watching so many cartoons like there's always a creepy

47:21

whether it's a party goblin or the pharmacy

47:23

witch sometimes I'll

47:25

make fun of myself I'll be like everything's a witch everything

47:28

my only have like two voices I do and even in this

47:30

new hour I have I have

47:33

this joke about I don't want to give away

47:35

too much but it's basically about a decision that all

47:37

women have to make and it's about how

47:39

and I as it comes out I'm like fuck it's another

47:41

witch that appears it's like yeah your choices

47:44

like there's always this sort of like

47:46

old English

47:48

rural witch who appears

47:50

to deliver news and I'm like

47:53

you got to get another word besides

47:56

which and goblin

47:58

and you got to do another voice

47:59

So I think

48:00

cognizant of that because I don't want it to

48:02

be like oh, this is the same character

48:05

that keeps appearing But she lives in my

48:07

head

48:09

There are two there are two little

48:11

moments I noticed in particular in hot forever

48:13

which really They kind of spoke to my

48:15

own sense of humor and also I could sort of I

48:18

really enjoyed the delight that you found in them

48:20

There's one moment when you're doing a puppet hand

48:23

and you kiss it and you go it's a goose

48:25

and it's like it's almost The only moment

48:27

in your show It's almost the only funny thing you say that

48:30

doesn't get a huge roar of a laughter

48:32

and I just loved how it was there For you

48:34

do

48:35

you mean like yes, who is like it? I

48:38

sort of felt like oh, I hope if I saw the

48:40

show again that precise moment wouldn't

48:43

happen Because it felt really real and

48:45

like you were sort of tickling yourself. You were like, oh

48:47

that you know, it was like a very sort of Yes Liberating

48:50

kind of moment of oh this is we see a little

48:52

glimpse as to how Eliza builds this stuff

48:55

Some of it she builds and it makes her laugh, but it doesn't

48:57

go anywhere and it was like a little window into that

49:00

I appreciate that and it kind of goes back to what I said,

49:02

like this is for me Your

49:05

art is for you. I am having

49:07

my own Sketch comedy

49:09

puppet show up on the stage in

49:11

my mind you can see all of these

49:14

costumes and characters and The

49:17

goose is just that whimsical moment for

49:19

myself But for anyone else who's like a little weird

49:21

in the crowd that also thought my

49:23

hand looked like a goose Little creatures

49:26

populate everything

49:29

Yeah Yeah,

49:31

the goose was that's funny the goose was there

49:34

That's funny. You got to have those

49:36

moments for yourself.

49:38

Otherwise, it's miserable

49:39

Totally. I mean that to be honest It was that and

49:41

then like a few moments later They're maybe

49:43

like five minutes later part of your act

49:46

out of being a sort of a not good enough

49:48

woman in In a bit

49:50

is that you go return me to the sea and it's

49:53

just it's from exactly it's not quite the

49:55

witch voice But I feel like geese which

49:57

is yeah me to the sea. It's all in that

49:59

world That's always lovely. It's

50:01

just like a whimsical sad world, you

50:03

know And I always try to say things when I'm

50:05

describing an ugly woman or something. I

50:07

always try to say things that are So

50:10

unrelatable that no one in the audience will be like,

50:12

oh my god, that's me Like

50:15

I have this ugly woman that I do in this

50:17

and I describe her as like a pitbull gorilla And

50:19

the only thing she says is like hot

50:22

dog and I'm like the chances

50:24

are no one looks like this or only eats hot dogs

50:27

Um, but you know I say this I'm

50:30

in one special I had a whole joke about

50:32

a Woman

50:34

appearing at a club at the end of the night and the guy's

50:36

gonna take her home and she's like, please like can

50:39

I can We wash my hump before we make

50:41

love and I said it because

50:43

no one has a hump Sure enough

50:45

years later. I get a DM

50:48

From some miserable woman. That's like my

50:51

son has a hump and

50:53

you're just like, okay, let me go back in time

50:56

Like I tried to pick the thing that no one has like give

50:58

me a break. So Whatever.

51:01

Sorry if your hand is actually a goose

51:05

Last question not sorry, are you happy? Are

51:07

you happy? Yes, I

51:11

Don't think anybody is I

51:13

mean, I'm not happy with the state of the world at the moment

51:16

There's all these external factors. But what I always

51:18

remind myself is like

51:21

Luckily you live I live in a place where

51:23

like the go outside the Sun is shining sometimes

51:26

a little too bright. I Don't

51:29

take safety for granted anymore ever

51:31

since

51:32

October 7th. It's something that looms large

51:34

in my mind and in my heart. I

51:37

Am happy I'm a happy person. I

51:40

might get sad and I might feel hopeless

51:42

or downtrodden. I Don't

51:44

have depression, but everybody gets depressed

51:47

because that's a normal swing

51:50

but overall

51:52

I'm not a negative person. I'm a realist

51:54

and

51:57

I usually wake up with a song in my heart

52:00

Like a weird song from the 90s

52:03

from like a local above ground pool

52:05

installation company or just

52:07

something random. So I am

52:10

happy and I try to keep things in my life that

52:12

make me happy and I try not to do things that don't make

52:14

me happy.

52:15

Stand Up makes me very happy and it's afforded me

52:18

the ability to do things that make me happy

52:20

like rescue this Chinese dog or

52:22

do a workout

52:23

or just sit in my house.

52:26

Thanks Eliza.

52:27

So that was

52:29

Eliza. Don't miss out on tickets for Eliza's

52:31

show at the Hammersmith Apollo at the event

52:33

of Apollo which is in Fulham really

52:35

isn't it? So don't

52:39

miss out on tickets for those go to Eliza.com

52:41

to find out all about her and follow her socials

52:43

and all of those things. I really cannot recommend

52:45

her stuff enough. It was a revelation to me. Brilliant

52:47

brilliant comic. Also

52:50

get tickets for the Soho Theatre if you fancy

52:52

go to Stuart Goldsmith.com. There's a lovely little pop

52:54

out video which I made in Wix in

52:56

about 10 seconds. I'm not advertising

52:58

them for money but if they'd like to pay me money more

53:01

than happy to tell everyone to get a website on Wix.com. It's

53:03

absolutely brilliant. Really

53:06

nice. In a recent meeting with my management

53:08

for them to say hey that banner advert on your website

53:10

doesn't go anywhere. There's no link. And

53:12

whilst saying oh sorry I'll just fix that.

53:14

I fixed it. Great. Give

53:17

me some money Wix. I'll sing to the skies in

53:19

praise of you. So that's

53:22

all good. This episode was

53:25

produced by producer

53:27

Callum. So thanks to producer Callum

53:29

who's helping me out with all manner of stuff right now.

53:32

It was logged by Susie Lewis and the

53:34

music of course was by Rob Smelton as

53:36

it always is. So

53:39

see me in Soho if you can. Catch up with Eliza.

53:41

That's all of that stuff. Oh God

53:44

I thought this system was a bit too simple. I

53:46

need to post an envelope at you. So I'll think of something

53:48

now by pressing pause but for now

53:50

I bid you adieu. Oh

53:52

it's

53:53

it's Wednesday. I often record these on a Wednesday

53:55

afternoon and I've got to take the boot cross swimming and

53:58

I've just had the thought of like oh God have I got time for.

53:59

post-amble I've got to get ready for swimming and

54:02

I feel like I've said that before. Do

54:04

you have... oh here's the post-amble I've got

54:06

a thing to talk about now but if you're

54:08

sticking around for that great if not please

54:11

try to maintain

54:12

a consistent sense of self.

54:19

So here's a thing that we can that

54:22

I can share with you. Do you find

54:24

yourself... this is pathetic I'll do

54:26

this quickly and then tell you actually about a fun thing

54:29

that happened in Brighton. Do

54:31

you find yourself...

54:33

do you ever buy pesto for example

54:36

and then take it home and open the cupboard in the six jones

54:38

of pesto? No? Do

54:41

you ever find a little

54:43

cuss on your hand and you keep getting a little cuss in your hand in

54:45

the same place and then one day you realize where you're getting it from?

54:47

Do you ever get out

54:49

of your... you constantly sing Song

54:52

of the Ancestors from Moana and it's

54:54

always in your head and you don't know why and then one day you

54:56

get out of your car and the

54:58

beep to let you know that you've left your keys in the ignition

55:01

is the first two notes of Song of the Ancestors

55:03

by Moana. It's fun that isn't it when you realize

55:06

what the thing is. It's

55:08

been an active part of your life for so

55:10

long quietly Darren Browning you to

55:12

make you think about things you didn't realize you were thinking about. And

55:16

so I just have one of them in relation to swimming. But

55:19

more meaningfully if you could imagine something even

55:21

more meaningful than that petty little observation.

55:24

I was in... a lovely thing happened.

55:26

Now listen we need to accept at this stage that if

55:28

you haven't seen spoilers you will do

55:30

one day. I hope you engage somewhere with

55:32

some bits of my climate

55:36

crisis comedy. That's a three

55:38

words to strike terror into anyone's heart. But

55:40

you can if you'd like to see some little clips there are some at

55:43

Stuart Goldsmith comedy on Instagram

55:45

and TikTok if you do that. But I mean

55:47

it goes up there as well but I never look

55:49

at it. Which is why it's not doing very well.

55:52

But Instagram reels going

55:54

swimmingly thanks. And you can find some some

55:56

clips and spoilers on there if you'd like to get the tone

55:58

of the sort of thing. There's a few...

55:59

a couple of three up on there now.

56:02

So with that in mind

56:04

I want you to come and see that show and I want you to engage with

56:06

it and what have you. The quest to

56:10

make the climate crisis funny in some way

56:12

has been ongoing for a year and a half and has been painful

56:14

and punishing and very exciting. I

56:18

have been ultimately, since completing

56:20

the show, it being

56:22

written, completing the Edinburgh run and everything else, I

56:25

have sort of felt this extraordinary

56:27

sort of, if I do a gig I've got

56:29

to stick some climate down their throats.

56:33

Because if I don't then what am I right? It's

56:35

the challenge, it's the mission that I'm on. And

56:39

I haven't been giving myself permission

56:42

to not do that and then in

56:44

the weekend I gave myself

56:47

permission. I had a funny old sort of a gig

56:49

on the Friday feeling a bit ring rusty and

56:51

a bit un-together and a

56:53

bit like God what is my walking around set

56:55

at the moment because it's also climate-y

56:58

and it's very, like it's what I want to talk about

57:00

but there's a limit to what you can do when you're

57:02

headlining a Friday night club.

57:06

I not only did

57:08

some writing for the first time

57:10

in ages because all the writing has been aimed

57:12

at climate stuff, I sort of gave myself permission to

57:14

just write about other things and

57:16

then do a gig about other things and

57:18

I just had the time of

57:20

my life it was like taking off lead weights

57:23

that you've been running with and it's important that you understand

57:25

I want to tell you about this without making you think that the

57:27

experience of coming to see me do comedy about the climate

57:30

is like putting on lead weights. I'm

57:32

speaking specifically and solely

57:34

from a performer perspective

57:36

I had

57:37

I've had fun and it's been super challenging

57:40

doing the climate stuff but to then let myself

57:42

off the hook and go I'm gonna do, I think

57:44

my set list was like the impossibility

57:46

of thinking anything when you look at the ocean

57:49

why the stars are terrifying and

57:52

something you know losing my mind in

57:54

a forest is like an older bit from a couple of years ago that

57:56

didn't develop further and now

57:58

I'm like oh I can develop. stuff burner,

58:00

it's still pretty fun head-squeezy stuff, but

58:03

the joy of not needing to bring

58:05

up a subject which is, which can

58:07

be inherently challenging

58:11

was so great. And I don't

58:13

know, I want, I mean I love, I love the stuff

58:15

I'm doing and I, I, as I've

58:17

said before on this show, if you work in sustainability

58:20

or know someone who does, I've got loads to offer

58:22

and loads to collaborate on and I'm

58:24

really enjoying that aspect of it. But

58:27

I'm particularly enjoying it now that the process

58:29

of building that show by making it robust

58:31

in comedy clubs is

58:33

largely concluded for

58:35

now and

58:36

now I can just go out and be a comedian

58:38

and fuck about and oh my god. Oh

58:41

my god, what a joy, what a privilege. So

58:43

there we go. That'll do me for now. Um, sorry

58:45

about the mouth noises. I'm beginning

58:47

to think that, you know, every

58:50

time I, this is inside,

58:52

inside baseball, every time

58:54

I record these blurbs I seem to suddenly have a blocked

58:56

nose and I don't walk around with a blocked nose and this

58:58

is quite good equipment. You can probably hear,

59:01

this is an awful thing to talk about, sorry, you

59:03

can probably hear that the last fucking bunch of post-dumbles

59:05

I've done, I think, I mean I am allergic to

59:07

dust, the cellar's incredibly dusty, I

59:09

record these in the cellar and I have only

59:11

just put two and two together in the manner of a tiny little

59:14

ADHD bellend who just never makes

59:16

connections between things in his life. I think I've

59:18

got to start grinding up

59:20

and snorting some antihistamine before I do the blurbs.

59:23

Yeah, right, I'll try and I'll put that

59:25

in the workflow.

59:27

Ta-ra.

59:30

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