0:01

Dear diary, well,

0:05

I had my first run-in

0:07

with one of those buried

0:09

blood knock-off Dracula's, and

0:11

let me just say, not

0:13

super impressed. Sure,

0:15

they're beefy enough. Got

0:18

that whole gargoyle's aesthetic going for

0:20

them, but that's about it. To

0:23

think I was worried about

0:25

this Sam's Club. We got

0:27

Dracula at home as jabronis.

0:30

There's just no soul

0:32

there. You know,

0:34

just anger and muscles.

0:37

I wonder, is that

0:39

all I would have amounted to, if

0:41

not for your intervention?

0:45

Ah, I remain in your

0:47

debt, my beloved

0:50

Arya. You

2:11

all are standing in a cavernous chamber in this system of tunnels.

2:29

From which the cult of the buried blood

2:32

operate. You

2:35

have seen a lot of unsettling stuff

2:37

in here so far. The most unsettling

2:39

is the bridge spine

2:41

that Philo has just

2:44

managed to cross. From one

2:46

sort of stone outcropping towards

2:48

another, you were heading

2:50

towards the exit from this chamber, which

2:52

leads deeper into this tunnel system.

2:56

The other two members of your

2:58

party, Lady Godwin and Mutt, were

3:00

halfway across this bridge, holding onto

3:02

a rope tethered to a massive

3:04

hip bone at

3:06

the far end of this bridge. Tethered.

3:09

Tethered. Quote unquote. Tied. Yeah, sure.

3:11

You're the sixth. Pretty

3:13

good tide. Thank you

3:15

for reminding me that. I forgot about that boner of

3:18

a roll. Yeah, don't you worry, buds. Thank you so

3:20

much. However, before you could

3:22

reach the other end, you all

3:24

were interrupted by the arrival of

3:28

several hundred rats. Let's

3:31

get into initiative. Let's put on

3:33

our initiative hat. I

3:36

also just wanted to say for like the one person at

3:38

home that's worried, Mutt left

3:40

Aggie with the basketball woman. With

3:42

the volleyball? With the sports? With

3:44

the sports shirt? Well, because she couldn't do the

3:47

underwater thing. That's a good point. Aggie definitely did

3:49

not come with you on that. That was a

3:51

big ask. Yeah. OK,

3:54

what are those rolls, friends? I

3:56

got me a 13. I

3:59

got me a 13. 10.

4:03

What? Yes, I got me

4:05

the problem of I realized I didn't have my

4:07

character sheet open. I've been fervently trying to get

4:09

it tapped alone. A classic

4:12

conundrum. Classic conundrum. But how

4:14

will you solve this puzzle? He'll wait and

4:16

he'll roll a 13. Okay. And

4:19

first in the order is Mutt. Mutt,

4:23

you are halfway across

4:25

this bridge. This bridge is 120

4:27

feet long and so you are still a good

4:32

distance 60 feet away from

4:34

either the entrance

4:36

side or the exit side. This

4:39

bridge is sprawling. Each vertebra

4:41

is 10 feet in diameter.

4:43

However, past that is a

4:45

steep drop off over

4:48

100 feet down, you would guess, down

4:50

into a sea

4:53

of bones. And that's bad.

4:56

It's not great. It's not great.

4:59

We hate it. Bones are

5:01

cool inside you. Doing

5:03

stuff for you, letting you play, you know,

5:06

play sports and all that stuff.

5:08

But outside of the

5:10

body, they're not anything that awesome.

5:12

Interesting. Okay. Okay. Great. Great. Great.

5:15

Great. Great. Great. Now

5:19

this is an important question for the

5:21

rest of this encounter, Griffin. Okay, cool. The

5:24

swarm of rats. Uh huh. Is

5:27

it being treated as an individual

5:30

mob or a bunch

5:32

of little monsters? It is

5:35

several groups of mobs, several

5:37

swarms of rats. Um,

5:40

yes. Okay, great. Um,

5:42

I am going to cast Zephyr

5:45

Strike on myself. Okay,

5:47

cool. Um, and,

5:49

uh, I'm going to take

5:52

a couple things. Uh, first, uh, it

5:58

gives me advantage on a an attack

6:00

roll on my turn it deals

6:02

an extra 1d8 force damage on a

6:04

hit and whether I hit or miss

6:07

my walking speed increases by 30 feet

6:09

okay cool so I can get to the other side of

6:11

the bridge but so you

6:14

would need to attack first in order to

6:16

correct that okay so I cast it on

6:18

myself okay and I'm going to attack one

6:21

of the groups of rats

6:25

they're heading our way right yes they

6:27

are they are storming across the

6:31

towards towards the bridge yeah they haven't quite made it

6:33

out of the tunnel that they're coming out of yet

6:35

but when they do it is going to be a

6:39

flood of rats okay they're exhibiting

6:42

what one might call aggressive behavior

6:45

make a survival check

6:47

for me because maybe they're just running away survival

6:49

or animal handling better

6:52

at survival at than

6:54

11 you are no longer

6:56

in your chosen terrain right though but you have to

6:58

be the thing that's all done I

7:00

don't think underground bone hell

7:03

is part of forest no

7:06

no no just with hunters intuition when

7:08

I make a perception or

7:11

survival check I can add a

7:13

d4 if it rolled to

7:15

the ability check no that's just part

7:17

of hunters intuition okay cool then okay

7:23

do that oh that's another

7:25

three so 14 we have 14 uh

7:28

these these rats seem to

7:30

be kind

7:32

of coordinated in a way

7:35

that sort of defies their

7:37

their what you know to be kind of

7:39

their their instinct and

7:42

so each individual mischief of rats

7:44

is coordinated together or the groups are

7:46

working together I

7:49

mean not working together but it is almost as if

7:51

they are marching in a line or

7:53

running a scampering in a line in

7:56

sort of a column Okay,

8:00

so they are going to have, I will tell you this,

8:02

they are going to have resistance to

8:04

this physical damage as due

8:07

to their sort of constituent nature. But

8:11

you, their armor class is not great, so

8:13

your odds of hitting are pretty good. Okay,

8:17

I'm so torn. I

8:21

mean, you need to attack in order to do

8:23

this. Yeah, but I could miss intentionally, right? I

8:26

guess so. So

8:29

much rats? Well, I

8:31

mean, I don't know that my as

8:34

like an outdoorsy guy has issues with

8:36

animals on site. I don't

8:38

think he's like what in a tunnel some rats.

8:41

Yeah, die die die. If you want to

8:43

delay your action, that is fine. Just to

8:45

see where they're at. Just to see what

8:47

kind of rats you're dealing with. I

8:51

think I have those convivial rats I've

8:53

heard about. I'm going to intentionally miss.

8:56

Okay. Just striking, goading strike. Yeah,

8:59

so I can get over there with

9:01

Philo and off of the big spine.

9:03

Okay, cool. Then that

9:05

is for sure. Firing wide on purpose. You can

9:07

for sure do that. You fire and

9:10

where are you firing? I'm

9:14

firing wide to

9:16

the left of like the opening of

9:18

the tunnel. Okay, cool. So it just hits

9:21

the wall. Yeah, easy. There's no way you

9:23

could miss missing. So

9:25

you do that as you do.

9:27

So I'm missing you this errant

9:29

shot. You feel the wind at

9:31

your back as there's ever

9:34

strike activates. Okay, and then I hustle

9:36

over with my good friend, Brother Philo.

9:38

Okay, you run towards the end of

9:41

the bridge. You make it to the stone

9:43

outcropping there and

9:45

he's still holding the rope or do you let go when you get

9:47

off? I think now

9:49

that I'm over there. I'm definitely still holding the

9:52

row. Okay. Cool

9:56

and you are able to make it across as you reach the

9:58

other side. You start to end up right next to. Phylo.

10:01

You can see these rats look

10:05

scary, red-eyed, more so than rats

10:07

even usually are, and

10:14

they all appear to be

10:17

asleep in their face, the

10:20

face that they're making, but their bodies

10:22

are fat in the base. Just

10:25

like they like it. Just like they

10:28

like it. A bunch of, a set

10:30

of thick temple tents over here. Lady

10:33

Godwin, you are up next. You are

10:35

still on this bridge, 60 feet from

10:37

the exit or entrance side, holding onto

10:39

this rope. What do you do?

10:42

Okay, so is it, am I 60 feet from the

10:44

exit or the entrance? You're

10:46

in the middle of the bridge. So

10:48

you're 60 feet from the exit. What's

10:53

blocking my path to the exit

10:56

vis-a-vis mischiefs of rats?

10:58

All of them. I mean, the

11:00

rats are coming towards you from

11:02

the exit. So, uh. Like we

11:04

were headed west or whatever,

11:06

and the rats are coming out

11:09

of the west towards you. Yeah. I'm

11:11

going to use Jennifer Meyers to

11:14

try to take a scoop of rats and dump them

11:16

off the bridge just to be like, you don't want

11:18

to fuck around. So what your speed

11:22

is, your speed is 40 feet, which

11:24

is enough to get pretty far down

11:27

in there towards the exit, but

11:29

not all the way. You could spend

11:31

your action to dash, but then you

11:33

would not have a, an attack action.

11:37

I'm going to run 30 feet

11:40

of the bridge. Okay. Use

11:42

up my move action. You can do 40.

11:44

And what? You can do 40. Your Godwin is

11:46

fast. Okay. Will that get me

11:48

across the bridge? No, but I'll get you closer. Yeah,

11:51

that's true. I guess it's a great point, Griff. Uh,

11:53

then I'll take all 40 of those feet and hmm. I'm

12:03

gonna throw my javelin

12:05

next to the wall. I'm

12:07

gonna chuck it into the wall. Next

12:10

to the crossbow bolt? Next to the rats. Okay.

12:14

Just try to like scare them off. Uh, okay.

12:16

Uh, shot across their bow. Yeah,

12:18

like, oh wow, this person, they

12:21

got, I don't know how many javelins I got. They could

12:23

have thrown that javelin at us if they wanted to. Yeah.

12:26

And what I think happens, Griff, is

12:28

I throw it and the

12:30

noise it makes from

12:32

the javelin hitting the rock

12:35

is specifically like poisonous,

12:37

I guess you'd say, to rats. Yeah.

12:39

Like hitting at a frequency that they hate so

12:42

much. Yeah, man, for sure. And

12:44

that sounds like, what? What's that pitch? Athletics?

12:47

No, I mean the note that the rats hate so much.

12:50

Like, what's the sound that rats hate? Um,

12:52

sea shark. Okay, great.

12:54

Because it reminds me of claws and

12:57

cats. They hate sea stuff, so. I

12:59

mean, if you are doing the same thing that

13:01

Mutt just did, which is sort of intentionally missing,

13:03

you know what? Let's do this as an intimidation

13:05

check. If that's what you're trying to do, if

13:08

you're explicitly trying to scare away these rats, let's

13:10

look at that. I am. I'm trying not to

13:12

exacerbate this. Okay, cool. Want

13:14

them to leave us alone. 16

13:21

plus 3. The

13:23

vanguard of this swarm of rats

13:27

splits as the sound

13:29

of the javelin-hitting rock

13:32

reverberates throughout the chamber.

13:35

And it splits basically around where

13:37

you and, or rather where Mutt and

13:39

Philo are standing at the end of

13:41

the bridge, runs on either side of

13:43

them and just goes flying off the

13:45

edge down into the bone pit. That

13:49

gets rid of one of the mischiefs

13:53

of rats. How many mischiefs are there? More

13:56

than you can sort of eyeball

13:59

freely. I will say okay. I have big

14:01

eyeballs Okay

14:06

Cool anything else? No,

14:09

okay. I'm out of I'll go ahead and start

14:11

raging okay in the hopes that maybe it'll make

14:13

me more intimidating Sure,

14:16

cool next in the order is out there skankin Next

14:21

in the order is Philo Philo is gonna

14:23

cast Flaming spear now they're

14:25

they're coming out of the tunnel correct towards.

14:28

Yeah, they are Okay, gonna

14:31

cast flaming spear right

14:33

at the mouth of the tunnel Okay

14:36

flaming spear right at the mouth of the

14:39

tunnel yeah a five foot diameter sphere of

14:41

fire Fuck yeah, this

14:43

is like a conjured thing right that

14:45

will continue to if my

14:47

boulder skate three knowledges right you

14:50

are basically plopping down a

14:52

five foot sphere of fire at the end

14:54

of this tunnel and Any

14:57

rats that try to go by it have

14:59

to make this deck save right okay

15:01

cool Mean

15:03

kind of mean kind of kind of it's

15:06

the kind of effective though. I will say

15:08

are you doing anything else? Are you changing your

15:10

position at all? No,

15:13

I think no I have

15:15

I Can direct it

15:17

where I want it, so I don't

15:19

see any need to move as a

15:21

bonus action yes I Tell

15:25

you what How

15:28

close is lady Godwin to the end of

15:30

the spine lady Godwin is about

15:32

20 feet Far

15:34

away from you still on the spine is

15:37

Godwin using the rope to help in any way

15:39

or just I Mean

15:41

the Godwin is holding on to the rope I believe is

15:44

all you know the other two members of your party were

15:46

which is just kind of like as a backup in Case

15:48

something happens to the bridge Okay,

15:52

I'm going to as a bonus

15:54

action after I cast this fear. I'm going to

15:57

Untie the rope from the hip bone and tie it back

15:59

I mean, that's a lot to

16:03

do in a six second long bonus action. I

16:05

think you would have time to do one of

16:07

those things, but I also can

16:10

understand if you would not want to untie this rope without a sort

16:12

of backup plan for that. Now, I

16:14

won't do it then. I'm just going to

16:16

cast the sphere. Okay, cool. Next in the order are

16:18

the... Wait a minute. Wait

16:20

a minute. It does damage. Which

16:24

are going to move through the flaming sphere, yes. They

16:27

are all going to charge onward down the tunnel. Five

16:31

groups of these rats are going to

16:33

have to make desk saves. Which I'm

16:35

going to do now. What is the

16:37

number they're trying to beat? They have to beat

16:39

14. That's one

16:43

fail, two fails. Next time

16:45

I will have no fail. Three fails. Okay, I'm going to

16:47

do the same thing. I'm going to

16:49

do the same thing. Two fails. Next

16:53

time I will have no fail. Three

16:55

fails. Four fails. Five

17:00

fails. Okay. Yeah, man,

17:02

they all fucking fail. That's classic

17:05

catchphrase. Yeah, nobody would get it.

17:08

What was that, Clint? That's new. That's new. I'm

17:10

trying it out. Hey, we

17:12

love it over here. We'll bounce

17:14

it off the focus group. Two,

17:17

three, six. That would be six damage.

17:20

Okay. Okay. And

17:22

I'm going to take a bonus action. It's

17:24

not your turn. No, no, no.

17:26

It's a bonus action. On your

17:29

turn, as a bonus action, you can move it. The

17:32

only actions you can take not on your turn

17:34

are reactions. Gotcha. Okay. Okay,

17:38

they are singed and

17:40

smoking, but they are still

17:42

moving. After

17:45

they took damage, did they change

17:47

in any way? No,

17:49

they did not. I mean,

17:51

they got singed and smoking. Okay, but they didn't

17:53

like snap out of it or something. They look

17:55

like a Ratatouille had a kitchen accident. Okay.

17:59

Like they peed in. Did the kitchen- did it

18:01

scare any of them? I mean, I gave you a

18:03

pretty great description of it. I know, I know. Like,

18:05

with a rat too, he did a kitchen accident, and

18:07

I don't know what else you want from me. Like,

18:10

I only have so much description in my

18:12

body per episode. Description juice, yeah. And I

18:14

don't want to use any more of it

18:17

on these fucking dirty rats. Absolutely. Yeah, Sidney

18:19

was telling me about it. Okay,

18:24

so, this swarm, the

18:26

giant swarm of rats, all of the rats, coming

18:28

at you like a tide, some of

18:30

them split off and jump right off the edge. However,

18:33

they are all going to crash

18:35

into you. I need all three of you

18:38

to make dexterity saving throws, please. Okay.

18:41

That's pretty good. At 25? Oh,

18:44

yeah. Okay,

18:50

and Philo, what was that for you? Oh,

18:52

7. Okay.

18:56

Rat and Godwin, you all

18:58

managed to keep your

19:00

footing. A lot of the

19:02

rats that were sort of diving towards

19:04

you, crashing into you, also spill off

19:08

the edge and go tumbling down into

19:10

the bones

19:12

below. Going to

19:15

get rid of two more groups. Philo,

19:18

however, you are much smaller, you are

19:20

much, much lighter. You

19:23

are easily picked up by

19:27

the swarm of rats, who

19:30

similarly go diving

19:32

over the edge of

19:35

the bone pit. Make

19:37

another dexterity saving throw here to see

19:39

if you are able to catch

19:43

the side in some way stop yourself from

19:45

going over. I'm going

19:47

to need at least a ten or above

19:49

for any kind of success here. Well,

19:53

how about a 12? Wow.

19:56

Yeah, 12 is not

19:58

amazing, but it is. enough that you are able

20:01

to get a few of your puppet fingers wedged

20:04

on the top of the cliff

20:07

before fully falling into the darkness like

20:09

the many, many rats that have just

20:11

smashed into you. Next

20:15

in the order, a crossbow

20:20

bolt is going to come flying from

20:22

the bridge. You

20:26

all turn to see two

20:28

guards are standing now in the

20:30

middle of the bridge, and

20:33

you see a third figure with them, and

20:35

this man has been stripped down

20:37

and looted. It is the

20:39

guard that you incapacitated earlier. Come back

20:41

to me. Three guards

20:44

on the bridge. See, this is my problem.

20:46

Should I kill the rats? Should I kill

20:48

the guard? Ugh. The

20:51

first crossbow bolt is going

20:53

to come flying at you,

20:55

Lady Godwin, biggest target, 19

20:58

versus AC. Oh yeah. It

21:03

stabs into your shoulder for

21:07

four points of piercing damage, which would be

21:09

halved since you are raging, so two points

21:11

of piercing damage. The

21:13

other bolt is going to

21:17

go towards Mutt.

21:22

Mutt a 20.

21:26

Not nat. Dirty 20. Just hits.

21:28

This one just scratches across your

21:36

side. I mean, I got 15 AC, so

21:38

it definitely hits. I was being

21:40

sarcastic. Well, it does it for four points

21:44

of damage. The third

21:46

guard does not have a weapon, so he is just going

21:48

to dash. Wait a minute. Justin.

21:51

Yes? Toby's sword will do extra damage

21:53

against that one. Oh no!

21:58

Okay, well next in the order is... But...uh...but

22:00

the situation's still a

22:03

lot of rats. Maybe

22:06

a third of the rats have now mostly

22:08

jumped into their depths. They

22:11

have all sort of been burned, all the ones

22:13

that have come through the tunnel, and beyond the

22:15

flaming sphere you can see yet a few rats

22:18

still. The crowd is definitely thinning out, though. Are

22:20

they squeaking and stuff? No, they

22:22

are completely silent. Oh, that'd be so cool. No,

22:24

it would be cool, but is it maybe even

22:26

cooler that they're completely silent?

22:29

Okay, I see. Um, well, not

22:31

gonna make the same mistake again now that

22:33

the guards are trying to kill us, so

22:35

I'm gonna take a shot at one

22:38

of them, their guards. Okay, closer

22:40

to you is the guard you

22:42

know is Toby, and the

22:44

ones behind him are, you know, within range

22:46

weapon distance. They just took a shot at

22:48

you, but they are a bit further back.

22:52

Um, I'm gonna take a shot

22:54

at one of the ones who took a shot at us. Okay,

22:56

cool. And

22:59

I'm gonna do a

23:01

snaring strike on him.

23:03

Uh, okay. Uh,

23:06

so let's shoot at him

23:09

first. Action.

23:11

Crapo. Does

23:14

a 17 hit. 17

23:17

hits, yes. Excellent.

23:20

That's great to hear. So

23:22

he's gonna take six

23:26

points of damage. Okay.

23:30

As well as, yes, he's

23:32

ensnared. So, a

23:34

rising mass of thorny vines appears

23:37

at the point of impact, and the target

23:39

must succeed on a strength saving throw, or

23:41

be restrained by the magical vines until the

23:43

spell ends. Does

23:46

a 12 save? It does not.

23:49

Okay. It means we have 15. He's

23:51

gonna take an extra 1d6, oh, at the

23:53

start of each turn, takes an extra 1d6

23:56

piercing damage. Okay. Let's

24:00

see, he'll be here. Okay, and then I'm gonna

24:02

use my second attack on The

24:06

other guard. Okay. No,

24:08

it's staring a strike on this one. Just a regular

24:12

Just a regular old attack. So

24:14

19 hit. Yes, it does and

24:18

He's gonna take 11

24:21

points of damage. Oh that one

24:23

goes just right on top

24:25

of the head Off the bridge

24:27

dead dead. That's nice That

24:30

is an instant KO on

24:32

that gentleman that season wrap

24:35

that is a season wrap on that one Toby

24:37

is Enraged

24:40

not mechanically. That's

24:42

just emotionally he is emotionally enraged next in

24:44

the order is Lady Godwin still

24:47

some rats on the The

24:50

precipice here with you some in the tunnel beyond the flaming

24:52

sphere You have one guard halfway down

24:54

the bridge that just shot at you and then

24:56

a dead guard currently falling down

24:58

to join the bones Below and one day become

25:01

bones You also have

25:03

Toby charging at you. He's about 10

25:05

feet away I'm

25:07

I look at Toby I'm

25:13

Terribly sorry about this, but

25:15

at the same time extremely

25:17

excited and then

25:19

I pull out My

25:23

blade the Toby Slayer And

25:25

I think in the here's what I imagine

25:27

Griffin. Yeah in the presence of a Toby

25:30

everyone hears music and play

25:33

flames emerge from the Toby Slayer

25:36

and Shafts of light

25:38

come in from walls Yeah

25:47

And then I swing the

25:49

Toby Slayer down on Toby Okay,

25:53

make a make an attack roll

25:55

plus one versus topies no

25:57

no I thought you said it had the flaming

26:00

poisoning sir oh yeah you're right

26:02

yeah but I don't that only

26:04

affects damage it's not it's not a

26:06

bonus to my hit dies not but that's true that's true

26:09

we still need to hit with the Toby Slayer it doesn't

26:11

it's not automatic you know what I mean like you know

26:13

but if it bites it bites 14 the 14 hit 14

26:15

just hits Toby

26:19

it's nothing this flames

26:22

leap into and out

26:24

of his skull poison

26:27

poison boils around I

26:29

don't want to the

26:31

boils his lung he

26:37

just collides he just he

26:39

just loses his his

26:41

form and the damage is

26:44

but somewhere another Toby becomes

26:46

more powerful so the damage

26:48

is seven plus 20 yeah

26:52

and then three

26:54

detail fire damage it's

26:57

unnecessary but please go I mean please roll

26:59

these I don't know what we used to

27:01

do uh

27:04

he just the picture you have painted is

27:06

true is true to life he just falls

27:08

apart and then explodes and then is on

27:10

fire for a little bit and then

27:13

a breeze comes and blows his ashes

27:15

away and a bird eats the ashes

27:17

and dies and

27:20

you could swear through

27:23

the flames just a moment

27:27

you see an apparition a figure

27:32

it's an old man with

27:35

Cain he's wearing a

27:37

little grandpa hat thank

27:42

you you have

27:47

freed me as

27:49

a ghost of Toby's grandpa fuck I

27:52

knew you're gonna do this fly around

27:54

to heaven I had big plans I

27:59

was gonna wait till we go to the

28:01

final boss of the whole stupid show be

28:03

like I'm gonna call you Toby from now

28:05

on it just fucking it was so cool

28:07

the sword still kills Toby's it's just this

28:09

the quest for this particular sword was to

28:11

kill this guy's shithead

28:13

grandson Toby so

28:17

like you've got a Toby new we didn't

28:20

cover if Toby had a moment of recognition

28:22

what he when he saw it singing through

28:24

the air slicing his fate as

28:26

it cuts the air no

28:29

I mean he did he's not gonna

28:32

give you anything like that cuz he

28:34

sucks so bad like yeah fucking yeah

28:36

yeah he's just a jackass who didn't

28:38

pay attention to anything and and

28:41

everyone's pretty glad he's gone you don't

28:44

see Toby's you did whatever goes

28:46

whatever resided inside of this the

28:48

physical object of Toby's body that made

28:51

him who he was has also been

28:53

destroyed by this blade I so complete

28:55

has been his destruct I I think

28:57

I speak for the listeners here and

28:59

I know I'm speaking for myself I'm

29:01

so glad we made Taz kill again

29:03

yeah yeah for sure this used to

29:06

be a show that people died on

29:08

a lot and for a while I

29:10

think we lost that a little bit

29:12

but I'm just so happy that Taz

29:14

is killing people yeah sometimes

29:16

just for having for their name a bad

29:18

job with the wrong

29:24

name coming in the wrong direction the

29:26

gold sword name on it dead you

29:30

don't know oh

29:49

hello there it's me Travis Macroy welcome come

29:51

in come in look at this

29:53

do you see this right by my front

29:56

door is where I keep my aura

29:58

frame what's an aura frame you I I'm

30:00

so excited you asked that because that's what I'm here to

30:02

tell you about an aura frame is as

30:04

far as I'm concerned the gift to end all gifts

30:07

the digital photo frame to

30:09

end all digital photo frames whether

30:12

you're looking for a birthday gift a Graduation

30:15

gift or a Mother's Day gift

30:17

or whatever for my money.

30:19

You cannot beat an aura frame

30:22

We use ours constantly. It's so nice

30:24

to come home From a

30:26

day out with our daughters or family

30:28

vacation or from a tour We've gone

30:30

on anything like that and just

30:33

connect and upload our photos right there while

30:35

we're still thinking about it So the photos

30:37

don't get like stuck in our phone.

30:39

You know what I mean? We can actually see them look at

30:41

them. The girls love to look at it They'll stand in front

30:43

of it and say was that me when I was younger? It's

30:46

wonderful or a frames are Wi-Fi

30:48

connected and come with unlimited storage

30:50

So you can share as many photos as you want from your

30:53

phone to the frame Not only will

30:55

the gift giver or yourself be grateful.

30:57

It's not something else. It's a gift.

30:59

They'll actually use I Promise whoever

31:01

gets this even if it's you is going

31:04

to be grateful for it and right

31:06

now or has a great sale for

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Mother's Day listeners can save on the

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perfect gift by visiting aura frames Calm

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on their best-selling frame. That's a you

31:17

are a frames Calm and

31:19

use code adventure at checkout to

31:21

show your support for the show terms and

31:23

conditions apply Just a few

31:25

announcements as well this week. We are going

31:27

to be in Chicago my brother my brother

31:29

me sold out If

31:32

you're coming and you have a question you

31:34

want answer to the show or if you

31:36

have a wish for fun galore that you

31:39

Want bread at the show email to mb

31:41

mb am at maximum fun org and put

31:43

Chicago in the subject line The town show

31:45

is going to be Taz versus Moby Dick.

31:48

It'll be our characters from versus Dracula

31:50

It's going to be an absolute hoot

31:53

and the c2e2 schedule is up

31:55

now on our website You can go to

31:57

bit dot ly slash McElroy tours for tickets

31:59

and more information and don't forget to

32:01

check out macroymerch.com to find out all the

32:03

cool stuff over there. 10% of all proceeds

32:06

this month go to the Palestine Children's Relief

32:08

Fund. So go check that out. But for

32:10

now, back to the show. Hey,

32:14

when you listen to podcasts, it really

32:16

just comes down to whether or not

32:18

you like the sound of everyone's voices.

32:20

My voice is one of the sounds

32:22

you'll hear on the podcast, Dr. Game

32:24

Show. And this is the voice of

32:26

co-host and fearless leader, Joe Firestone. This

32:29

is a podcast where we play games

32:31

submitted by listeners and we play them

32:33

with colors over Zoom we've never spoken

32:35

to in our lives. So that is

32:38

basically the concept of the show. Pretty

32:40

chill. So take it or leave

32:42

it, Bucko. And here's what some of

32:44

the listeners have to say. It's funny,

32:46

wholesome, and it never fails to make

32:48

me smile. I just started listening and

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I'm already binging it. I haven't laughed

32:52

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32:55

discovered it sooner. You can find Dr.

32:57

Game Show on maximumfund.org. Video

33:02

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we've got you covered. Find us at

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33:30

Bye. Philo,

33:39

you are up next. You

33:42

are hanging off the edge of the cliff

33:44

with your little wooden fingers. Raps

33:46

continue to pour over you. What

33:49

do you do? God, that is

33:51

so gross. Yeah, it's a

33:54

nasty... It is a really nasty scene down

33:56

here. Okay, I'm going

33:58

to drink my flying elixir. elixir. Okay.

34:03

Pops open the vial, drinks

34:06

the flying elixir. Yeah,

34:08

why not? No

34:11

time like the president, they

34:14

say. And gently fly

34:16

up emerging triumphant through

34:19

the stream of rats. That's

34:22

like bursting out. Yeah,

34:24

you you as you to

34:26

reach this potion, you have to

34:29

let go of the wall. All right. I

34:32

think that the exciting version of this is.

34:34

Oh, I got

34:36

it. I think it's a well, no, no, no, hold on.

34:38

I think I want a slight of hand check, because

34:40

you're trying to do something very badass

34:42

that I want to happen very, very much. But

34:45

I feel like it will be a lot thicker

34:47

if it if it is if

34:49

it is mechanical. Okay, I think it's

34:51

light of hand check to retrieve this

34:53

potion and consume it while falling. I

34:55

think it is pretty sick. Well,

34:58

then can I push away from the

35:00

Yes, absolutely. So like, I'll give

35:03

you a manage. I will give you advantage

35:05

on the side of hand check you buy

35:07

yourself some time by sort of like throwing

35:09

yourself away from the not quite here edge

35:11

of this swan like yes, bringing back. Okay,

35:13

here we go. Here's the first one. Well,

35:16

I'm going to need that advantage. That's a

35:19

six. We're gonna need better than that. Yeah,

35:21

well, here we go. Five

35:24

is not better. Oh, worse.

35:26

Okay. Well, then okay. You

35:30

are you fall fully

35:33

you are you try to reach

35:36

into your pouch to retrieve

35:38

this to retrieve the potion that

35:41

will save your save your life

35:43

and your wooden form here. But

35:46

it is hard to wrestle with

35:49

a clap of an alchemist

35:52

toolkit. While

35:54

it is rattling around in the breeze of

35:56

freefall. You managed to

35:58

retrieve this potion and

36:01

dump it into your puppet potion hole.

36:03

I have it considered. I

36:06

have to imagine at this point you've just bored a

36:08

little hole into the front of

36:11

your face. Now,

36:13

Kassev. Yeah, I guess that's true.

36:16

Okay, you chug down

36:18

this potion. You

36:20

do it pretty far into your

36:22

freefall. I think the result of

36:24

this is your momentum

36:26

is going to slow as

36:30

you crash down into the bones.

36:34

This effect will continue to work. You'll be able

36:36

to fly, but first you are going to hit

36:38

these bones. But

36:40

you will have resistance from

36:42

this 2d10 damage because of the slowed

36:45

momentum. So

36:51

a constitution check? No constitution

36:54

check required, my friend. You

36:56

sure? Yes. Okay.

36:59

A total of 13 damage

37:02

halved, so you take 7 points

37:04

of bludgeoning damage as

37:06

you crash down into the bones. Drinking

37:11

a potion? Yes,

37:14

okay, so drinking a potion is an action. That's

37:18

fine. But however, all

37:21

that you have used at this point is your action. I'm not

37:23

going to count falling down a pit as your

37:25

movement because it was somewhat

37:27

against your will. So

37:30

fair enough to say that with

37:33

the flying elixir, I take the damage, but

37:35

I fly up? Well,

37:37

I mean, you are now standing on the

37:40

bone pile below and you feel weightless. So

37:42

you feel like you can now fly back

37:44

up. You have to tell me where

37:46

you want to fly, what you want to do. It's not sort of an

37:48

automatic. I just want to fly straight up. I

37:51

just want to fly straight up, straight

37:53

up. Okay.

37:58

You what's it look like? How

38:00

do you what does flight look like for you is it

38:02

is it clean Peter Pan flight or is it Morris fizzy

38:04

lifting drink? Or

38:07

if you're like, are you flapping your arms? Yeah,

38:09

you're a bird No,

38:11

I think he would it's Peter Pan

38:13

stuff Peter Pan ten

38:16

feet straight up almost

38:18

like almost

38:20

like a Keanu

38:23

Reeves matrix In

38:26

the dojo move that out cool

38:29

arms akimbo One leg bent

38:31

straight up. Yeah Okay,

38:33

you do so make a perception check

38:36

for me Not

38:43

giving the rolls today, that's

38:45

an eight Okay

38:49

Your your flight speed with this potion is

38:51

just remove speed right? It's just you can

38:53

fly with it Yes, and

38:56

then feet and ten feet.

38:58

Okay, so 40 feet you fly 40 feet

39:00

straight up about halfway back up to from

39:02

from where you fell You

39:05

notice only sort of

39:07

at the last second as you are approaching

39:10

the the end of your move here That

39:13

it's a little bit harder than

39:15

you expected it to be It feels like it is

39:17

getting harder and harder as you go up you worry

39:19

for a moment that maybe there's something wrong with the

39:21

potion But as you

39:23

look down you realize that your

39:26

ankle is Being

39:28

held by a skeletal

39:31

hand connected to

39:34

the skeletal arm Just

39:37

a skeleton going and then what's the

39:39

arm bone connect to the? clap

39:42

clap clap you the clavibone the

39:44

clavulous a a skeleton

39:48

wearing a crown is Holding

39:51

on to your ankle as you fly

39:53

up and this skeleton

39:55

is similarly being held up by What

39:58

Looks like a almost like a cheer? The Leaders

40:00

pyramid of skeletons. Ah the

40:03

the bone High alert. Something

40:05

in it is trying to

40:07

keep you from sleeping here.

40:10

Imo. Next. In

40:13

the order I already have a bonus action.

40:15

All you can motor say I am goes.

40:18

I move my sphere into

40:21

another mischief of rats. Ah

40:23

oh hey, are you. And.

40:26

This is a trick question moving

40:28

it. Down. The Tunnel. Toward.

40:30

The Rats deeper in the tunnel?

40:33

Are you moving it out onto

40:35

the of cliffside outcropping? Were on

40:37

a couple miss. Sets of rats

40:39

are standing but also your friends.

40:44

To rouse I think some farther up the

40:46

tunnel how that will you hesitated a long

40:48

time there before the providing everyone this at

40:51

me and dress them on fire. Her I

40:53

was trying to visualize because he said they

40:55

were and like out a rough line of

40:57

Miss Miss Fishes. ah ok you are going

40:59

to be able to rammed his sphere into

41:02

a creature. one of these misuse of wrath

41:04

counts as creature it will have to make

41:06

them it saving throw against the seers damage

41:08

and the sphere stops moving. This turn see

41:10

can do this. It's only gonna nail one

41:13

of these wrap swarms. Right air.

41:15

You get the impression that they're

41:17

not that many remaining. Ah so

41:19

Decks Saint Fourteen. Taxi

41:21

fourteen we got a crit

41:24

sale so nope. And

41:26

they take to the six fired him into the

41:28

role that for me. Five.

41:33

In A to. Have examined Seven.

41:35

Okay, Ah Godwin and my, you

41:37

see the ball, our role deeper

41:39

into the tunnel, and ah, you

41:41

see the rats that are continuing

41:44

to swarm out. They look actually

41:46

quite a bit worse off than

41:48

the the rats that were burned

41:50

or recently the scuttlebutt more. More.

41:53

That more mustard on?

41:55

ah. They are however

41:57

up next so. ah

42:01

But I think looking at you, the two

42:04

of these swarms of rats are going to try

42:06

the same maneuver, try to knock you off into

42:08

the bone pile below. I need you

42:10

to make a dexterity saving throw for me. Okay.

42:16

Let me do

42:18

that. Okay, my dex save

42:20

throw, 22. Yeah,

42:22

wow, okay. I mean, I have a plus seven to

42:24

dex save throw. 22

42:27

is fucking great. You just hop

42:29

step through these rats like you're

42:31

playing fucking DDR around them.

42:34

They go diving off the edge

42:37

of the platform. You

42:41

see a flaming

42:43

swarm of rats. One

42:46

more. Actually, let me roll that dex save.

42:49

The last swarm of rats come pouring out of the tunnel. That

42:53

is a four. No, so 2d6 fire

42:55

damage please, Clint. And these rats here?

42:58

Eight, wow. Okay, yeah.

43:02

The flow of rats has stopped as the last

43:04

group of rats come swarming

43:06

out. They like all the other

43:08

rats that have come through this flaming ball look

43:11

pretty bad off. Two of

43:13

these swarms of rats are going to just attack

43:15

you, Lady Goblin. Oh man.

43:20

That is a 15 versus AC.

43:24

Oh yeah, that hits. Okay, you

43:26

are going to take seven points.

43:28

Piercing damage halved down to four.

43:33

And the second group of rats?

43:37

No, that is a four versus AC. It's not

43:39

going to hit. Their teeth can't

43:41

penetrate the thick flesh

43:45

of the body you are

43:47

riding on, Krangstyle. And

43:50

that is it for the rats. I

43:53

think the only guard left is entangled. He

43:55

is going to try and escape that. Yeah,

43:57

just knew that. Well first he takes one

43:59

decent. Oh, does he? Okay,

44:01

roll one. Roll one, two, six. Three.

44:09

Okay, you see him

44:11

fight against the vines, and then you see the

44:13

vines quickly and

44:15

violently hug him in towards

44:18

the spinal bridge, and

44:20

you see him crumple unnaturally and

44:23

die. Okay.

44:27

Okay, so that's it for him. Um,

44:30

much. You are up. Okay,

44:33

so currently, have all the

44:35

rats, there's like only one or two- There's only

44:37

two swarms of rats left, and the two swarms

44:39

are both engaging Lady Godwin in

44:41

combat. Okay, so I can see

44:44

this, um, pet squad

44:46

of skeletons grabbing Phyla's ankle,

44:48

right? Yes, exactly. And

44:50

there's a crown on one of them? The one

44:52

on the top, the one that is actually holding on to him. Is

44:54

it a nice crown? Mmm, it

44:58

was at some point. Okay, then I don't

45:00

want it. I'm gonna take aim for

45:04

the elbow joint

45:06

on the arm holding. Okay,

45:10

I was gonna go for risk, but then I feel like

45:12

that's a bigger risk of hitting Phyla. So,

45:16

okay. Yeah, I'm

45:18

struggling, because if this is just an attack

45:20

roll, that is a very- you can't just

45:22

shoot someone's arm off because- I mean, it

45:24

would have to be like a dexterity check

45:26

or an athletics check or something like that,

45:29

right? Yeah, it's gotta be an all-or-nothing situation

45:31

and not an attack roll

45:33

where even if you hit, you get some

45:35

damage, like it's either- Right, right, right. This works

45:37

or you miss. This is a fucking hard

45:39

shot, though. Yeah, yeah. This is a

45:41

very, very hard shot. You are

45:43

60 feet above this

45:46

situation, and so like, I'm not even sure what

45:48

kind of a beat you would be able to

45:50

get on this joint. So

45:53

if you want to make just a straight

45:56

dexterity, check on this. I would need a

45:58

20. DC 20. Ooooh,

46:02

tempting! Okay,

46:11

now, there's

46:14

another wilder thing I'm gonna

46:16

do. Cause I don't think I can make that.

46:19

I'm gonna untie the

46:21

rope from where it was tied.

46:23

Okay. And

46:26

tie it around myself.

46:30

And jump off to swing down and try to

46:32

grab my friend. Um...

46:36

Just so we know, I'm doing it

46:38

so it's like over that joint, right?

46:40

So it's not just Godwin to me,

46:42

it's Godwin to joint to me. Godwin

46:45

is... So Godwin's just holding the rope.

46:48

Yeah. Hold on tight! Why

46:51

would you not just jump off with it still tied to

46:53

the hip bone? Okay, yeah, then

46:55

I'll do that, Griffin. Okay, I'm trying to fix this. Well,

46:57

it's just Godwin's not... The

47:01

physics of Godwin would have to spend her

47:03

turn holding this rope. I'm not... I don't

47:05

have a PhD in physics, Griffin. Okay. Yeah,

47:08

Griffin. Not like

47:10

you, Griffin. We hear about it all the

47:12

time. MIT Vis, MIT that. We fucking get

47:14

it. We get it, Griffin. If

47:17

you want to play from the rest of the

47:19

dragons with my family and have a good fucking

47:21

time, every time I mention

47:23

Bill Nye, Griffin says, Oh, that bitch.

47:25

That guy's done. It's so

47:27

weird. I get really, really messy

47:29

about Bill. It is science.

47:32

The science drama... Science community drama

47:34

is messy. Yeah, that's why they

47:36

wear lab coats. Okay. Let's

47:38

do it. I fucked Mr. Wizard! Thank

47:41

you for saying that. Thank you! Thank you!

47:43

Thank you! I fucked Mr. Wizard!

47:46

Thank you. Okay,

47:48

so you just jump off... No, I tie

47:50

you on. To yourself? Yeah,

47:52

I tie it on myself. I'm jumping

47:54

down, swan diving. Give me a surviving check.

47:57

Okay. So, see how

47:59

this... Can I tie it? Uh-huh. That's

48:02

a nat 20 baby. You

48:05

tied a shit out of that. You

48:08

tied a shit, what kind of knot is it?

48:10

Travis, you did a bad job. Knot. Ah. Ah.

48:15

I do. Can I say,

48:17

it's, here's the thing. It's

48:19

a cubed knot. Like people

48:22

have done square knots before. No

48:24

one's done a three dimensional cubed

48:27

knot. I mean,

48:29

it's only been prophesied to

48:31

this. Like there have been legends once

48:34

Merlin was able to do it, but then

48:36

he immediately died from this thing. The

48:39

knot is so good,

48:42

Mutt, that the other shitty

48:44

knot that Philo made, you

48:47

like shoot that knot a dirty look and

48:49

it gets its shit together. Yeah, there we

48:51

go. That knot becomes better being in the

48:53

presence of your incredible tesseract of

48:55

a knot that you've made. I love that. Okay,

48:58

and you just go swan diving off the

49:00

end. Are you jumping towards? My

49:04

intention is to create like an arc, you

49:06

know, so that I'm swinging through to grab

49:08

him. Oh, you're swinging like on the other

49:10

end of the bridge to like still do

49:12

that sort of fulcrum swinging. This knot is

49:14

so good that you tie just enough slack

49:16

off that you like work the math of

49:19

this maneuver out perfectly. Cool.

49:22

Mutt has been doing like

49:24

rope swings into rivers since

49:26

he was a kid. Yes, he's got

49:28

experience with those. Great, cool.

49:31

You swan dive gracefully

49:34

over the last, you know,

49:37

few dozen remaining rats over

49:39

the edge and fall

49:42

just beautifully towards the bone

49:44

pile. You

49:47

reach the edge of the rope's

49:49

length and it snaps and

49:52

you begin to swing. Cutting me in half. It

49:54

steps and your body is instantly

49:57

bisected, I'm

50:00

bisexual! That's

50:02

not what that means! Bisexual!

50:06

Bisexual is better. And

50:08

you swing towards Philo,

50:10

who is being grappled by these

50:14

by this pyramid of skeletons.

50:18

I'm gonna, I mean I

50:20

think just let's complete

50:22

the sort of like arc here,

50:24

no pun intended. What are you

50:27

trying to do as you reach them?

50:29

Traveling quite fast, I will say. Yeah,

50:31

no basically I'm hoping that I am

50:33

coming at him like a spider monkey.

50:35

Right? And I'm just whoo, wrapping and

50:38

going. You're just trying to grab grab

50:40

him. Yeah, with the force to like

50:42

break the grasp. Okay.

50:46

So I want a, this

50:49

is gonna be an attack roll

50:51

on Philo to grapple him. Okay.

50:54

This is to grab him. Then

50:56

I will, then if this succeeds we will make

50:58

a strength contest to see if you can pull

51:00

out of this skeleton's grasp. You

51:02

will have advantage on that track just with the

51:05

sheer momentum of your your

51:07

pendulous force right now. That

51:09

is a 23 to give. Yep,

51:11

okay. You grab him easily and

51:14

firmly. You

51:17

feel like a weird weightlessness from him.

51:19

Come with me! As he is

51:22

flying, you actually feel a bit of buoyance

51:24

that is like adjusting the arc of your

51:26

swing here. And

51:28

I plan for that. We are going to make a

51:32

straight up strength roll to see if

51:34

you can pull out of the skeleton's

51:36

grasp. You have advantage. Ooh. Okay.

51:40

I got an 18. Oh

51:42

boy, I have plus zero. Is this a saving throw or

51:44

check? Just a strength check. Oh boy.

51:48

Okay. A

51:51

six and you got him

51:53

that. Yeah. And

51:56

an 18. Alright.

52:00

You know, I, yeah, all right. So

52:02

what happens is you swing with a tie

52:04

here. What

52:08

happens is that you feel yourself

52:11

grab Philo and start swinging upward

52:13

a little bit faster than you

52:16

swung downwards, thanks to the, uh,

52:18

the flying puppet that you are

52:20

now holding onto. However,

52:22

as you look down, you realize

52:24

that the crowned skeleton is still

52:27

hanging onto you, uh, you know,

52:29

rather onto puppet

52:31

Philo, and two

52:33

of the arms of the skeleton that were holding

52:35

him up have come off with him holding him

52:37

up at his feet. Okay, progress. So

52:40

progress, yes, you are now swinging

52:42

back upwards. We will

52:44

call your turn there and move on

52:46

to Lady Godwin. Godwin, you are still

52:48

being challenged by two more swarms of

52:50

rats as this, frankly, just,

52:54

uh, undead Cirque du Soleil act is

52:56

happening. Uh, you know, a

52:58

good 60 feet below you. Can

53:00

I assist? Do they need to be retrieved? Does

53:02

it look like? Is it something I can assist

53:05

with with a sharp tug? Uh, yeah,

53:07

I mean, you could for sure grab the rope

53:10

as they are swinging up. And if you try

53:12

to, you know, hand over hand, like

53:14

pull it in pretty fast. I'm going to try.

53:16

I'm going to try to reel them in. Okay.

53:20

Because I, I don't know. I was

53:22

going to make a run for it. I'll be honest, but

53:24

I'll go ahead. I think that's

53:27

Justin talking, frankly. Yeah. Well,

53:29

I just hate the dang rats. I know you do,

53:31

bud. We had to fiddly fart around with these guys.

53:34

Uh, all right. I'm going to try to, uh, bring

53:37

them in, try to retrieve them. Okay.

53:40

This is got to be pretty good at

53:42

reeling things in. Yeah. A lot of

53:44

fishing. This is

53:46

going to be a strength

53:49

check. Uh, it is,

53:51

I mean, you're going to have to move this rope

53:53

pretty fast to like pull them in at

53:56

an appropriate angle to their, to their

53:58

swing. Yeah,

54:01

alright man, for sure. You

54:06

manage to grab

54:08

the rope as rats

54:10

continue to bite at

54:13

your ankles. You

54:17

pull hand over hand reeling

54:19

in yard after yard

54:21

of rope until

54:24

finally from over the surface

54:26

of the cliff's edge, you

54:28

see this wild

54:31

scene approaching you. You

54:33

see Philo holding

54:36

onto the rope, flying,

54:38

holding onto, being

54:40

held onto rather by mutt, and

54:43

you see a crowned skeleton with

54:45

a couple other skeleton arms holding

54:47

onto him, holding onto puppet Philo.

54:49

You see them all as you

54:51

yank them up with a 22,

54:54

you pull them down just as

54:56

the rats peel off of you

54:59

and bring them crashing down onto

55:02

the heads of the remaining swarm of

55:04

rats, killing them. The

55:07

rats! The rats! Wait, the rats,

55:09

alright, Garvin? Killing the

55:11

rats? Killing everyone, unfortunately. I look at the skeleton

55:13

with the crown and I say, welcome to Bridge!

55:22

And I punch it in the face with my bonus action.

55:27

Okay, make an attack roll. Oh

55:33

wait, I wrote my great axe, right? I shouldn't do

55:35

that. No. She's not an arm

55:37

strike. It just so happens it was a crit fail. It's funny

55:39

how that happens. Why? D&D Beyond

55:42

was like, that's not what you're supposed to

55:44

roll. That's not what you're supposed to roll. Uh, 13. Does

55:47

that hit? Uh, yeah, 13

55:49

hits. You punch this, uh, this

55:52

prone skeleton. For 4 damage. Okay.

55:55

You punch it and the head rolls

55:57

off of the skeletal body. crown

56:00

stays on, you see that it is like fused with

56:02

the bone. And it rolls. Oh

56:04

no, I wanted a free crown. It

56:06

rolls towards the edge, it stops just shy of the

56:08

edge. It rocks precariously towards

56:11

it before tilting backwards and

56:13

coming to a halt, laying on its side,

56:15

looking back at you with a frozen

56:19

look. I mean of course it's frozen, it's

56:21

a skeleton of surprise on

56:23

its face. And then

56:25

you hear a voice from

56:28

inside of this hollow

56:30

skull, and it says,

56:33

How dare you, peasant! Peasant

56:37

you have struck me! What

56:39

a terrible accident you have made!

56:42

What is your problem, fellow? Peasant?

56:46

Peasant? What's your name? The peasant who has struck me?

56:49

Oh, sure. It's a rudeness. She's

56:51

actually a lady? She's a lady? Lady

56:53

Gawan? My name is Lady Gawan. Lady,

56:55

I apologize, I did not know I

56:58

was in the presence of fellow royalty.

57:00

What is the year, madam? The

57:03

year? What is the year? Well,

57:05

as you know, it's 1842. Ah!

57:10

As we

57:12

all know, it's that

57:14

time, I said. I've

57:17

been boned for so long! And

57:20

what of Britannia? Oh, it's fallen. No,

57:25

it's just a Dracula country. Now

57:27

it's very sad. Who

57:30

over is Tanya? There's only Lumino. You

57:33

must. Ugh. You

57:37

see, the skull looks just despondent. It

57:39

rolls to be face down in the

57:42

dirt. Hey, hey, ma'am. Hey.

57:46

Hey, bud. Do you want to come with us? I

57:50

can't leave my boys. Were

57:54

you sorry for your boys? Ha!

57:57

My boys! Ha ha! My

57:59

boys! You mean my... my...

58:03

my crew, my squad? Oh,

58:05

okay. My fam. My fam? Oh.

58:09

They are the mightiest knights in

58:11

all the realms, in all the

58:13

known realms of this world. They

58:16

are the knights of the round table for you

58:18

see I am King Arthur Pindragon. Oh

58:21

my... Wait, are you... Foreign and

58:23

ruler of Britannia. I

58:26

suck a punched King Arthur. I'm

59:29

King Arthur. I'm

59:38

King Arthur. I'm

59:43

King Arthur. I'm

59:53

King Arthur. I'm King Arthur. Thank

1:00:00

you.