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cutting the price of the The

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take on now for more

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information, visit Bigwinwin.capri still Co.uk

2:04

Nazis Aziz apply the eighteenth

2:06

last wedding moments and sixty

2:08

to tude tests is required

2:10

retain receipt Visit Big when

2:12

window cabrio code or you

2:14

cables though. He's and see

2:16

set was beautifully red circles and be a really

2:18

good. Welcome

2:24

to staying relevant The book authors to

2:26

buy two best friends the to James

2:29

weeks and Sam's Club said it's about

2:31

sets the baby Kava means this he

2:33

says a sycamore says on Sunday Monday's

2:36

episode be some main of so you

2:38

can watch on youtube morrow which is

2:40

Friday and tests on Monday so they

2:43

process and i anyone else. Monday

2:47

Thursday Friday Sunday I'm reading certain

2:49

people do that because in with

2:51

some of in some of you

2:53

like his appointment that make see

2:55

right through do too much stuff

2:57

for us on you tube instagram

2:59

six of say he gave on

3:01

and. Lunar Orbiter nothing

3:03

followers on the ground which is great the

3:06

I'm going to do i'm still not drinking

3:08

I am going to sway such than Monica.

3:10

Their feces and listen up part of the

3:12

puck have been this episode which means we

3:14

he for municipal about you guys. So if

3:16

you have got. A good story or

3:18

you've got an interesting things to

3:20

tell us that make see writing

3:22

remembered, make it interesting and sends.

3:25

Didn't Sue staying relevant and sexy

3:27

Thanks to.com same height as to

3:29

why so we have our first

3:31

Less than that. It's from Flow

3:33

and will love Flow and I

3:36

flights. Subjects

3:38

and that way to send an email

3:40

with the subjects on it. Confessional: My

3:42

boyfriend is jealous of my Dc cloth.

3:44

Oh My. God he bought. This is.

3:46

Off. or santa beats

3:48

my boyfriend and i love be a podcast

3:51

he bought me tickets your life shows the

3:53

christmas and we got see you in london

3:55

made better bought a fight i got to

3:57

purchase and bring home a p with Dishy

3:59

cloth I should have seen the signs of

4:01

what was to come when we were at

4:03

the show My boyfriend did not pay for

4:06

the dishy cloth and wasn't thrilled with me

4:08

buying it Anyway, I have hung up the

4:10

dishy cloth in the kitchen from a cupboard

4:12

door on the wall next to the sink

4:14

I saw I have a lovely

4:16

view when I'm washing up on Sunday morning

4:18

My boyfriend got up with our children Whilst

4:21

I had a shower when I came downstairs.

4:23

I saw a scene that I can only

4:25

describe as Sabotage my dishy

4:28

cloth was hanging half off

4:30

the cupboard looking as though someone had

4:32

attempted to tear it down This

4:34

cupboard houses the boiler and when I questioned

4:36

my boyfriend He said the boiler was making

4:39

funny noises So he checked it and when

4:41

he did the dishy cloth fell down and

4:43

he couldn't put it back up as I

4:45

rehanging the dishy cloth I noticed something else

4:47

a small stain along at the edge of

4:50

the dishcloth Again, I questioned

4:52

my boyfriend for him to tell me it

4:54

had actually Accidentally fallen into

4:56

a sink of dirty water It

4:59

now has a horrible brown stain all along

5:01

the edge of my beautiful dishy cloth

5:03

I am certain this was an act

5:05

of sabotage and my boyfriend wanted to

5:07

ruin my beautiful Pete wicks dishy cloth

5:09

It's clear to me that my boyfriend

5:12

is jealous of my dishy cloth I'm

5:15

not sure how we move forward from

5:17

here. Please help. I love you both

5:19

flow Fuck my throat hurts

5:21

after the first the flow I've never heard

5:23

dishy cloth be used so much in such

5:25

a short amount of time and I really

5:27

enjoyed it Just say it again for me

5:29

dishy cloth dishy cloth. Yeah, the dishy cloths are

5:31

the number one seller on the tour Don't put

5:33

your hands on like that. You know why they

5:35

are. I knew they would be Mate

5:38

the calendar years. I'd be golden age But listen

5:40

when we were doing the merch and I literally

5:42

said this and it's a load of crap So

5:44

let's just fucking do whatever when someone said do

5:46

tea towels I thought who the

5:49

fuck by the tea towel evidently a lot of

5:51

you by tea towels because they are the highest

5:53

Setting thing is the tea

5:55

towels these salmon you would the salmon Pete dishy

5:58

cross. No, no, no, not the salmon people Dishycloth,

6:00

the Pete's Dishycloth. The ratio of

6:02

buys, we actually got the scores

6:04

not that long ago, are

6:06

about 90-10 in Pete's.

6:08

I'm surprised someone's even bought one of mine. Pete's

6:11

got his top off, tats are out, he looks

6:13

jacked, he looks amazing, it's from the Golden

6:15

Ears and they fucking love it. He's from the

6:17

Golden Ears, I don't think anyone will buy one

6:20

now. Got a bit of a derby. I have

6:22

seen a lot of people have taken me

6:24

in their Dishycloths hanging up all over the place.

6:27

My manager even bought one. I mean the Sam

6:29

Dishycloth has been selling a little

6:32

bit. I

6:35

feel like I'm not filling my weight when it comes to merch,

6:38

haven't done much. But yeah, no

6:40

listen, I love that. Do you think he's actually sabotaging

6:42

it or could it have just fallen in a sink?

6:45

No, to be honest with you, I mean how would

6:47

you feel if you went home and there was a

6:49

half-naked man just attached to your boiler? Uh...

6:52

Sounds like the start of a porno. I was gonna say, well...

6:54

Come to fix the boiler. Yeah, do you know

6:57

what actually, to be fair, I'm trying to think

6:59

what I'd do with Zara. So if Zara like

7:01

had a crush, I didn't even know who Zara is

7:03

for Lev Crushes, I should ask her. I

7:06

should ask her who are for Lev Crushes and then I should

7:08

pretend I'm really annoyed. Well you're a bad person to ask because

7:10

Sam and I have got a job in Ibiza soon and I'm

7:12

staying for the next couple of days because I want a couple

7:14

of days off and Sam was originally supposed to do it and

7:16

he can't, he's got to go back for a job but he'd

7:18

invited Zara out so he told me to stay when, well Zara

7:21

can just stay with you for two days. No,

7:24

she cannot. No, but it's just weird, why would

7:26

me and Zara just... You hang out all the

7:28

time. Yeah, but it's just odd, like can you

7:31

imagine? I'd like to deny fucking your girlfriend when

7:33

you're in the jungle, let alone if we go

7:35

Ibiza together and also I've seen... You should

7:37

have a good time. I've seen what you two

7:39

do on your holidays and all that will be

7:41

is me and Zara doing TikToks on the fucking

7:43

beach. Yeah, it comes up that I can start

7:45

wearing legends. Absolutely fucking not. Listen, I appreciate everyone

7:48

that's bought with Dishyclough and I salute

7:50

you Flo. I'm not sure how to move

7:52

forward from here, please help. Sam, how should

7:54

she move forward? I think what

7:56

she does is she buys a Sam Thompson one to

7:58

balance the scales so it could... because that's

8:00

what I'm saying, you're not buying me dry candy,

8:02

so why don't you put me on one side,

8:04

put Pete on the other side, right? And then

8:06

you can be like, no, I got both of

8:08

them because I just love staying relevant so much.

8:10

Also, for people that haven't, because we obviously, we've

8:12

spoken about the tour a lot for obvious reasons

8:14

because we've been on tour, but there is an

8:16

awful lot of you who haven't been able to

8:19

get tickets and we apologize for that, especially as

8:21

the majority of you are sort of day one

8:23

podcast listeners, not just the jungle massive, which is

8:26

the majority people that I think got the tickets

8:28

for the tour. However, how would you feel, oh

8:30

God, why do I notice when I say however now,

8:33

how would you feel about if we sold

8:35

much all year round? Because there's potentially, rather

8:38

than just being people on the tour, us, we

8:40

might sell much all year round. So let us

8:42

know if you'd be interested in your own dishy

8:44

cloth, you don't have to arrive. Or a mug.

8:47

Yes, there's mugs, there's t-shirts, there's all sorts of

8:49

things. We may even have some other bits, you

8:51

know, we've spoken before about calendar, we've spoken about

8:53

all sorts of stuff. If you'd like us to

8:55

do much for everyone, let us know. Pete calls

8:58

it tat. Yeah, if you want

9:00

some Pete Wick's tat and some Sam

9:02

Thompson tat, some staying relevant tat, let

9:04

us know what sort of tat you

9:06

want and we will tat you up.

9:08

We'll surprise you. Yeah, exactly, we've pissed

9:11

and tat. We'll come to your door. We

9:13

won't, we don't deliver. We'll

9:16

deliver. We're not delivering.

9:18

You're great, vid. Oh,

9:20

fuck me. But

9:23

yeah, Flo, so what

9:25

you think she should do is just buy Sam Thompson

9:27

one. Buy Sam Thompson one because you can balance the

9:29

scales a little bit there and let's be honest, he

9:31

won't be jealous of me. I have seen some people

9:33

who have taped this in merch. Someone, you said it

9:35

earlier on, someone spent £80 on merch at the tour,

9:37

which is wild. The ticket's already 30. But I actually

9:39

saw someone who spent £116. Did you

9:42

say it as well? What

9:44

did they buy? I don't know what you bought,

9:46

but there's no, we don't do

9:48

refunds. So you're stuck

9:50

with that. I presume it

9:52

was a drunk purchase of £116. Do

9:54

you know when you wake up and you're like, you're off

9:56

for a massive night out and you're like, God, what did

9:59

they do last night? They're freaking out going

10:01

fuck I bought 110 pounds worth of

10:03

staying relevant merch. Yeah, a lot of people

10:05

have been using the tote bags have gone

10:07

down well. You've got tote bags?

10:09

We've got staying relevant tote bags which have gone

10:12

down well. I've also seen a

10:14

lot of people forcing members of their family to wear

10:16

the t-shirts they bought. You know, I

10:18

went to see the tour last night, I popped in

10:20

to see my nan and there's some old deer wearing

10:22

a staying relevant t-shirt. But we appreciate it. The more

10:24

of you that we see in the merch the better.

10:26

I'd actually like Flo to see a picture of it

10:28

hanging on your boiler and I'd also like to

10:30

see a picture of the staying. Hey,

10:38

I'm Ryan Reynolds. Recently, I asked Mint

10:40

Mobile's legal team if big wireless companies

10:42

are allowed to raise prices due to

10:44

inflation. They said yes. And then when

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I asked if raising prices technically violates

10:48

those onerous two-year contracts, they said, what

10:50

the f*** are you talking about, you

10:52

insane Hollywood a*****e? So to recap, we're

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cutting the price of Mint Unlimited from $30 a month to

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free job on linkedin.com/spoken

11:36

today. We

11:41

do have another story. We do. This

11:44

has actually dug out the archives. Now you go

11:46

and take away people. I actually think you should

11:48

read this. So this next letter is probably

11:50

one of the best things we've ever received

11:52

on this podcast. I'm literally just going to

11:54

strap in for a good time here. He's

11:56

just crossed his legs. You'll

11:59

find that... Why in a minute? If

12:01

you listen and have listened to the podcast not

12:03

even that long ago We had

12:06

a bonus episode where we spoke about

12:08

a masseuse who? had

12:11

inadvertently Pulled a tampon

12:14

from her client thinking it was a

12:16

little bit of cotton hanging off from

12:18

one of the towels at the fancy

12:20

Hotel just bear that in mind. We

12:22

have just received this and I swear

12:24

to you on my life That

12:26

this is legit. We haven't just made this up

12:29

on my life Pete on your life. So

12:31

actually What's happened was when

12:33

the original story came in about the same on

12:35

which I'm sure you'll remember because we discussed it

12:38

And we obviously yeah in depth and we obviously

12:40

know lots about women's health This

12:43

email was actually sent pre that one because

12:45

we found it. We just missed it There's

12:47

so many things to dissect with that like

12:49

how lucky are we the two people random

12:51

of just fucking written this in? Anyway, sorry

12:54

this I'm not gonna name her. Hi, Sam

12:56

and Pete I love your podcast

12:58

so much and this has been on my

13:00

mind since it happened So what who better

13:02

to share it with then you two so

13:04

the other week I decided to treat myself

13:07

to a spa day at a fancy five

13:09

star spa and got a full body massage

13:11

For this you have to be naked, of

13:13

course and with just a towel covering areas

13:16

However, as the lady moved lower down to

13:18

my legs I felt the weirdest feeling just

13:20

for a split second and didn't know what

13:22

it was until I realized she had just

13:24

taken out my Tampon with her own hands

13:27

I had no idea why or what

13:30

to do in shock So the treatment

13:32

carried on in complete silence and neither

13:34

person addressing it. Is this

13:37

a normal occurrence in massages? Please

13:39

help. I am so embarrassed

13:41

and I am so Fucking

13:45

happy that we have found this

13:47

and just like Pete said to

13:49

reiterate this was actually sent in

13:51

before the massage story how

13:54

amazing that the The

13:56

tampon incident in that I mean

13:58

really you sat in She could have

14:00

spoken about the podcast because you both obviously listeners Wow

14:03

wild at the masseuse and the what do

14:05

you call the person get the massage? Connoisseur

14:09

massage II yeah, and the

14:12

massage even massage But

14:16

it's not the receiving end of a massage

14:18

basically in the entire world YouTube

14:21

over here since staying relevant and Pope decides

14:23

the messaging as if it wasn't Good

14:26

enough the first time we can now hear

14:28

from both sides and it sounds just as

14:30

awkward but my favorite thing about all of

14:32

that is the fact that she is aware

14:34

that it happened because I My

14:37

point you still don't get like what

14:39

I find crazy Is that

14:41

the masseuse was like I don't know whether

14:43

it's like she knew or not and

14:45

now we know That she was

14:47

sat there in fucking silence being like well It's the

14:49

weirdest thing that's ever happened to me in my life

14:52

But my favorite part of this if you kind of

14:54

imagine it and it's like you know You imagine being

14:56

a fly on the wall is just I just wonder

14:58

if you know sometimes there's a giveaway They obviously didn't

15:00

speak about it, but if there's a and

15:03

like a weird little noise Yeah, I mean and then they were

15:05

both just lying there thinking to us say something do I say

15:07

something? What do I do? I've got a boss. I've been thinking

15:09

I tell you who will know what what I should have done,

15:11

Santa Pete That's the weirdest part

15:13

of this, but I mean you haven't really

15:15

given us context on how you felt I

15:18

need more I need more than that yeah

15:20

I genuinely do need more because the masseuse

15:22

said that she left the room afterwards and

15:24

was in bits like just so you listen

15:26

to This podcast obviously we want to let

15:28

you know the masseuse is beside us because

15:30

yeah, cuz it doesn't help me because I

15:33

thought Initially if you pull a tampon

15:35

out of someone's vagina I feel like by accident

15:37

then I imagine that that is something that I

15:39

couldn't believe that she hadn't said nothing But I

15:41

couldn't believe that you hadn't said nothing you haven't

15:43

addressed Why you said nothing I want to know

15:45

why no one said anything because that is the

15:47

weirdest bit for me is that no one Nice,

15:49

you know what I'm gonna put my hand up

15:51

here. So wouldn't cuz I am too polite So

15:53

if I pulled your tampon out by accident, you

15:55

know, I would let you when I would if

15:57

it's you if it was a random I would

15:59

let and get away with murder because

16:01

I just I just I hate confrontation

16:04

but you don't you wouldn't

16:06

go what the fuck are you doing no but you know

16:08

you would like that's my tampon give it back no but

16:10

imagine sitting there and lying there but oh my god I

16:12

think I'm so sorry I think that was my tampon you

16:14

just pulled out like I just I don't know how you

16:16

get less awkward than going but then I don't

16:19

I don't know how else you get

16:21

through that I think you just laugh

16:23

at it don't you you laugh at

16:25

it and then are you bleeding

16:27

afterwards I mean I don't know it depends I

16:29

also want to know and I'm pleased I want

16:31

you to write back in when she whipped out

16:33

it would have been even better if because

16:36

if I'm the masseuse I'm sitting there going well I've got

16:38

to make this seem like it happens every time I know

16:40

we just can't have a tampon in there she whip it

16:42

out just straight in the bin just gone but like do

16:44

you know what I mean I feel like you the only

16:47

way I get through that is acting like you're professionally knowledgeable

16:49

about that yeah this is what I should

16:51

have done I mean obviously when we've had

16:53

that massages before we can't answer whether or

16:55

not that's normal or not but judging by

16:58

the face of the three ladies in the

17:00

room it's not normal okay all

17:02

right so we've got some sort

17:04

of noise no noise what the fuck

17:06

are you doing okay cool oh

17:08

I let me and you always I

17:11

know I know the feeling yeah don't want you to

17:13

rock the boat yeah no it's that I pay for

17:15

a mass I was not gonna have it when I

17:17

think of team wholesome I think they wouldn't mention if

17:19

their tampon was pulled out yeah it's the first thing

17:21

right but but more than actually the story cuz I'm

17:23

gonna be you haven't actually described that

17:26

story nearly as well as the masseuse but

17:28

it is a great story we can CC

17:30

you both in on an email she invited

17:32

the tour will put the subjects tampon discuss

17:34

or if you both want to write in

17:36

with what you would say to the other

17:38

person now that would be great we

17:40

could read out your responses because

17:43

I feel like it needs to be addressed because

17:45

there was a sort of a weird tampon pulling

17:47

incident that I just don't think we can leave

17:49

it there we've heard both sides now we have

17:51

heard from both sides we can't make our mind

17:53

out on on what should have happened that

17:56

has been one of the best bonus

17:58

episodes that I've seen I've ever, ever seen

18:01

and heard of. Thank you for listening

18:03

to Staying Relevant with myself and Samuel

18:05

Thompson. Make sure you watch this episode,

18:07

because you're going to want to see

18:09

it on Sunday when it comes out

18:11

on YouTube. We will be back next

18:13

week with more listener stories and all

18:15

sorts of shit. Sam, where do they

18:17

follow us? Because I'm just sorry. Oh,

18:19

follow us on Instagram, TikTok, Snappy C

18:21

and the Tube, not on the actual

18:23

Tube, on YouTube. And we're at Staying

18:25

Relevant podcast, as I'm sure you're aware

18:27

by now. And please just comment and

18:29

like and subscribe and do all that shit,

18:31

because I read every single one. And if you

18:33

have any more stories or things you want to

18:35

say to us, they don't have to be tampon-related.

18:37

I know we've been sort of tampon-heavy. But I

18:39

do have people, do you know what? I really

18:41

enjoy the fact that people turn to us for

18:43

like their... I don't think they genuinely

18:45

turn to us for advice. I think they turn to

18:48

us for a funny story more than... I don't think

18:50

they turn to us for hygiene, certainly. People turn to

18:52

us for like, what should I do when it comes

18:54

to PSHE? In terms

18:56

of class, we took it to school. What's PSHE? Something

19:00

about sexual health? OK,

19:02

well OK, just tell us what PSHE's names

19:04

are. Really help me. Personal

19:06

Educational... P-E-E. P-E. P-S-H-E.

19:09

Personal Sexual Education

19:11

Hotline. That's still

19:14

not PSHE. Thank you for

19:16

getting in touch with us, because we care about

19:18

it. If you want to get in touch with

19:20

us, then make sure you email stayingrelevantatinsanityhq.com. We

19:23

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