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Welcome to raising up the podcast. I'm Rowena Hobbins, a mother of neurodivergent children, as well as a certified life coach and menstrual coach who help travel women through some of the trickier stuff, navigating through how to become a mother from the newborn stages, right up.

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Through to when we go through menopause, perimenopause, and every other rites of passage where we can learn how to reclaim our bodies, mind, and spirit.

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Come join me and my guests as we share all our education and knowledge to help support you in the moments that feel really tricky and hard and understand that you are in the precipice of changing a life based off raising up.

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So welcome, welcome to this big journey.

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Of reclaiming your womanhood and understanding how we are raising little people and raising ourselves into our own raising.

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Welcome back everybody to Raising Up The Podcast.

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Today I have the guest that everybody has been asking me to have on my podcast.

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I have so many questions about my weight loss journey and I really felt like I needed to bring this person out and shine the light on her because she has been a massive support in my life.

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Welcome Jade to Raising Up The Podcast.

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Oh, thank you so much for having me. I feel privileged.

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Oh, Jade, I feel like we were just discussing before that we both call ourselves coaches, but we are both very different in the way that we coach, I guess we could compare it to types of accountants, like we have a different label with accountancy.

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But when I have come to you, I was referred to you through a friend who I saw getting amazing results.

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And we had both, were on this, a similar trajectory of where we were in our lives and really busy mum life.

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And she said, you really need to go to a line.

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And I remember when I first started with you, I had so many massive wounds.

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That followed me into this, and it was from previous trainers, dietitians, nutritionists, people that meant well family, in laws, and I had so many scars that I didn't realize, and I was so happy when I don't think you even intentionally knew it that you were trauma informed around the way that you come across with your clients and how you hold space.

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And I highly recommend you to anybody who is in a similar space of really needing a healed relationship instead of the wounded relationship that we have with trainers.

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So thank you so much for the work that you do for all of us.

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Like that honestly means the world to me and yeah, I can't express just how thankful you are.

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I am for you coming into my life. As I said to you previously to start in this, I really feel that we connect on just so much more than just a coach and client relationship.

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And my past experience I think comes out in my coaching and I hope he does anyway.

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But that's. All I want as a coach is for people to understand I have been there in your situation too.

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I'm not just a trainer that passes you over things to do without doing it myself.

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I walk the walk as well with you girls.

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Yeah, a hundred percent. And I feel the thing that has resonated so deeply with me is that when you're in a space for me in particular, I'd put on 20 kilos and had gone through some really tough years.

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And I had so much self judgment about myself already that when I showed up to another female, I felt that was another scar from the past that showed up.

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And so when you hold space for women, I feel like you're also showing.

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That healed sacred sister wound as well too.

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And that's something that my experience has been with you is that every time I'm having a down moment and feeling less of myself and judging myself very hard, you're always really quick to say it's okay.

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It's just, it's okay that you've had a bad day.

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It doesn't mean that you failed. It doesn't mean that you've been unsuccessful.

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It's just another day. Yeah, absolutely.

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And that comes from my past experience. I think having coaches myself being told that if you don't tick all your boxes as such every single day, you don't do your cardio, you don't do your nutrition, go for the walks, go drink your water, you're fouled.

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And I've had that previous mindset.

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And it's very toxic, because as soon as something doesn't go right, and let's be honest, That happens the majority of the days something isn't going to be perfect.

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None of us are perfect. We're all imperfect.

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As I always say I completely resonate there with this.

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Jade, I feel like we really need to introduce you properly as well too.

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So can you tell everybody a little bit about yourself and your training and what you actually do for women as well too?

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Yeah. So do you want me to go back from where I started with this or just what I do right now?

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I think if we focus on right now and then I feel like then we can go back to the past story because with raising up the podcast is always a bigger story that you have such a beautiful story.

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I want to share too, but I want to focus and celebrate you right now and where you are professionally as well too.

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So look, I look after women worldwide and my goal as a coach is that you girls come to me and I provide you with the tools that you need to be successful with your journey in fitness.

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Whether that is weight loss or toning your physique, building muscle, whatever that looks like.

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The majority of clients I look after want to lose weight first and build a healthier, stronger body.

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And when people do initially come to me, it's more about goals physically.

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But over time it changes, so you want to lose a bit of weight, you want to be a size X, but as soon as we start working on your habits, which I'm really keen on doing, and I'm not just there to give you really strict routines.

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It's not going to fit in your lifestyle. I work with you and your lifestyle most importantly, because you are different to another client.

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You're different to me and what works for you doesn't work for somebody else.

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So everything is very personalized, and your habits have to be something that you can sustain long term.

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And I work with you, and as I said, when initially clients come to me, goals change, and it becomes more about becoming a stronger woman.

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For when your children are growing up, for when you become grandparents, it's about that strong physique over time.

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At first, initially, I don't think everybody sees it like that, and They're desperate to lose weight and, they want to come out of vicious things that they've been involved in before.

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Fat diets, extreme exercise.

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But as I work with my clients, that transition is.

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If I continue working on myself every day, I'm becoming stronger, not just physically but mentally as well.

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And so that's how I work with clients on a one to one basis, working around their lifestyle.

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But working on the pillars that actually get you to where you need to be.

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And I think there's so much mixed information on this.

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So many people think that it's just exercise.

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And to me, exercise is... It's amazing, but it's the icing on the cake if you're not looking at the foundations that you need to be looking at to change your physique, to become healthier, to become happier, to have more energy, to feel better about yourself.

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And by doing that, working on pillars such as your nutrition, moving your body with just steps, your water intake, your stress levels, your sleep routine.

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No exercise here just yet, right?

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These are just the foundation pillars, if we can get those right.

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Everything else, you become a by product of it. You start to see the weight coming off.

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You're becoming more energized. You're feeling better about yourself.

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Clothes are fitting better. That confidence starts to increase.

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And that transformation, for me as a coach, giving goosebumps as I say it, is unbelievable.

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Because it's not just somebody physically changing, they're mentally becoming stronger and happier and confident.

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And that has a knock on effect on...

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Every part of your life, because if you're not confident at home, your children will reflect on this.

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They will pick it up without doubt.

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Your sex life, your relationships at work, how you excel in your career.

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It snowballs. It literally snowballs and you see a client start and they could be with me six months, they could be with me two years, but as they snowball, it's just beautiful.

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From my side, to watch somebody really transform.

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So hopefully that kind of gives you a nutshell. Oh, it's beautiful.

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It's so lovely. And I just, I feel like it's a really good opportunity to reflect on my relationship that I've had with you, because when I first came to you, I was so worried about what was going to be.

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What I had hap, happened before where it was pushed on me that I had to not drink coffee or, exercise five times a day and do all these things.

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And I just remember how slow you went with me because that's what I needed.

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And I knew that's where I was at. I was at a standstill and I had been stuck in this point of time where I wasn't able to.

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Even make space for myself just in the day.

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And I think when you were able to reflect back to me that all I needed to do was just give myself a daily habit.

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I remember that was something that you're really consistent with me with and how that.

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One simple thing has changed my life immensely, and you're such a big, beautiful advocate for looking after your mental health first and getting that before we can even start stepping into the physical stuff.

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And we talk so much about how exercise is such a vital part to our mental health as well too.

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And that is the driving force. And I've had younger women come to me and I know that you can relate to this part of the story and I'll lead way for you into this too.

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And they are exercising purely for how they will look and starving themselves purely for how they will look.

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And I have been there and done that.

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I have been a yo dieter myself and didn't realize how obsessed with food I was.

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Until I actually did start with you and how I had trained myself into a space of not even being able to take action because I was so fearful of failure over and over again.

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I think the point of difference with you is that whenever I got to a, a milestone.

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It didn't mean it didn't have to be a movement on the scales.

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You were there celebrating me and helping me to say that change was possible.

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I think that's something that you do so well is show people that it's okay to feel like you can change.

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And that can be really scary for a lot of people.

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I think change is big, right?

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I don't think people realize that commitment to yourself and making those little changes, how scary it can feel because you're trying to do something different.

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And like you said, if you've been that person that has tried and tried again, you've got that fear of.

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And I'm just going to try again and it's just going to be the same result.

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And I've been there, I've been the same as yourself.

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I was born in the 2000s, so a very toxic time where I was having this conversation with a client yesterday where you have to be skiddy.

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In fact, if somebody in the celebrity world put on a little bit of weight, they were deemed as fat.

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I've been there where cows were. If you didn't weigh this, you didn't fit in sort of thing.

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And that's where my own hangups come, from how we were brought up.

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Not the way I want to live now.

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And I've done a lot of work with this, but things in the fitness industry with coaching is it's not what you weigh on the scales, right?

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And something I'm really passionate about is if I ask any of my clients, if you get to, let's say your goal was 12 stone, just throwing a number out here, You hadn't worked on your mindset and you got to the 12th stone.

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Will you truly be happy that you are at 12th Stone or have you worked on your journey and fallen in love with yourself over that process and have you celebrated the little wins?

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And what becomes normal, right when you've, when I work with you, is the wins that we celebrate at the start become very normal into your lifestyle, and we forget to celebrate them.

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We think, Oh this is my new normal now. And I'm moving my body a little bit more and I'm drinking a little bit more water, but then you might have a bad day or a bad week.

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You're still doing so much better than where you were a year ago.

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And something I always want to bring up is celebrate those wins because they're the things that are going to help you keep moving forward.

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It's not that maybe you've overeaten a little bit today or not eaten the best choices of foods, et cetera.

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So yeah, celebrating wins for me helped me overcome.

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So mental issues that I guess I had from previous experiences myself.

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And I think too I know that you've spoken to me about this and, the idea of having the five closest people around you and when people take you on as a coach, you're the person who is changing that inner dialogue for people to.

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And now I will send Jade videos going, Oh my gosh, look at my muscles, where I would never have said that a year ago.

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Do you know what I mean? It's just I can hear myself, that, that vibrant voice is in my head now too.

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And it's changed my internal dialogue in such a positive way.

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And I just want to thank you so deeply for that.

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But I know you. Came from a similar journey.

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And I think that's why you've got such a great vision on women like myself who are in this position.

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Can you share a little bit more about that journey? Yeah, cool.

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So I have always been into fitness from a young age, so I'm talking 15, 16, but it was more obsessive to becoming these perfect figure.

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Being brought up when I was younger, it was always you had to be skinny to fit in.

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Being in the magazines and the public eye, that was just published all the time.

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And of course, as a young girl, that's what you chase.

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So I was a yo dieter. I was extreme.

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I had tried every fad diet.

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I'd taken tablets to shrink my stomach. And I'm not proud of it now, but it made me who I am today.

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In my early 20s I had liposuction. Now, to put this into perspective of people, I've not actually changed in body size.

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I've been between a size 8 and size 10. But I had liposuction.

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And to some people that's absolutely crazy.

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And to me now, it baffles me that a surgeon did it.

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But hey. We go back 15, 10, 15 years now and my journey changed and my mindset shifted away from this after a good 10, 12 years was when I had my son, seven years ago, six years ago, six and a half I reached out to a coach.

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I hated my body after pregnancy, and I'm happy to admit this, from looking at being, you need to be perfect, you need to be skinny, having a baby.

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I took my size 8 jeans to the hospital, which is laughable now, but expecting to be snapped back and back into those small jeans didn't quite happen.

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But that's another story for another day.

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And I was... In a way to say, disgusted with how I looked after pregnancy.

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I felt ashamed, I wore baggy clothes.

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I just. Didn't feel comfortable when I reached out to a coach and I can remember the conversation I had to this day and she took me under her wing and I still talked to her and I'm so grateful for everything that she taught me.

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And for me, what she taught me, I want to teach everyone and I want to make it a huge impact.

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on so many women's life because she literally gave me the confidence that I can now go out and wear what I want and just love who I am.

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I know I'm not perfect and I still have imperfections and I still have cellulite and my belly jiggles just like any other woman.

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I'm not perfect and I think sometimes people think fitness coaches are because of social media, but we're not.

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I'm human. But I'm ever so grateful for what she taught me and Seven years ago, so just a child, I took the leap of faith and changed my career.

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Yeah. And I think this is such an important part of the story that you tell too, because you had this very serious career, which I'll let you go into more detail and shifted your perspective in life.

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And I know that space where you were.

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Working so hard at not only perfectionism with your body, but I'm assuming also in your work life and career at the time too.

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And I think for most women, before we have babies, it's called the maiden stage.

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And then when we enter into the motherhood stage, we start to really think about what we actually want to birth into the world, not only as children.

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And what we want to give back to, and I think we really have this identity as wanting to be productive humans and feeling like we need to maybe have a different set of priorities when we are at that younger stage of us.

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And as you said, you've grown up in this landscape of where you were told to be a certain.

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Girl and, be functional in society by being perfect.

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And I just wanted you to share a little bit more of that version of Jade and how she, came to that space of really needing to shift completely out of that career too.

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So I was, before I was. A coach, I was very successful in a corporate industry in banking.

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I had done it all since I was 15. So I built myself up the ladder.

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And, falling pregnant in that industry, being in corporate is challenging itself.

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Unfortunately. I think it's getting better, but very challenging.

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Expected to return full time. Otherwise, I wouldn't quite keep my position.

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And as a mom, that's hard to hear, but at the time I sucked it up and I was enjoying the job it was very good pay.

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But unfortunately I lost my brother shortly after my little one died and that had a huge impact on my life.

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At the time. I was in prep for a competition.

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So as I said, I wasn't keen on how I was looking.

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So I put myself in a fitness competition to get back into shape, to get back to this perfect body.

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And I lost my brother unexpectedly. He was 32 at the time.

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We are now five years down the line. And that changed my whole attitude to life.

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No money in the world could make me happy if I wasn't happy in the job that I was doing.

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If it wasn't bringing me value, if it wasn't making...

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Me actually feel my worth and making me feel like I actually did something different and I was actually helping people and so that time I took the leap of faith and changed careers and I don't look back at it.

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It's not been easy. Setting up a business has definitely not been easy with a little boy, but it's been the best decision I ever made from going through experiences that wasn't easy.

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Yeah, and I just really want to honor this part of your story and sharing how the loss of your brother has really impacted you as well too, because I think too, when we have people who are our siblings, especially too, and who we have a close relationship with, I think that.

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I hear you say that a milestone of when he has passed and how that has affected how you live your life with wanting to really value the memories that you have of him as well as having your own son to now in the world and how you want to manufacture a better world because of the legacy that I'm sure your brother has left with you too.

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And I think too, when we talk about grief, There is two parts of grief that can be with us and I was sharing this with you before is that for someone like myself who hasn't been through an unexpected death and we are living life in a way that feels not with that trauma related to that's a different part of it.

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The grief as grief stands by itself alone, but there's also a trauma that's attached to losing someone in a way that feels as though they were taken too soon too.

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And I think what I have seen in this trajectory for using that word again, for people who wouldn't have had that happen, it creates this space in their life where they're pushed into a version of themselves where they might not have been if that passing hadn't happened.

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Absolutely. I couldn't agree more. Had that not happened and life thrown me.

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You could say the wrong card at the wrong year, but would I be where I am today?

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I don't know, is the honest answer. I was living a comfortable life, income was good.

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I had enough holidays and, if you look at that side of things, but it's that when something like this happens.

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You look at your whole life and to this day, it's not something that you ever get over.

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It's something that you don't ever just forget.

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People say it gets easier. I'd probably say it's not easier.

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You just learn to live with something.

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And it comes in waves. It's the only way I can ever try and explain to somebody.

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It's like the saying, one moment, and it can be one moment, even not a day.

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And you're happy, you're in prison, you're enjoying life and then something would come.

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It doesn't have to be anything. I've been in the gym and there's a song that just is my brother's song and I'm in floods of tears now and I'm not a very emotional person.

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I said this to you earlier. And you learn to get better at dealing with it.

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I think is the easiest way to explain grief.

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And I wouldn't wish it on anyone. It's something that's really hard to deal with, but it does make you do look at life in a very different way and make choices that maybe I wouldn't have made before.

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I think too, Jade, when I talk about how, when I first came to you and you were able to see me in a way that other trainers had, I personally believe it's because you have.

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Being in those darkest depths of yourself and you could see where I was at too.

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And you knew exactly how to walk with me and hold that space open for me.

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And I truly believe, even though I wouldn't wish.

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That on anyone that also gives you a greater sensitivity to all humans, and that deep understanding that, you can still have a life, but you still are walking with grief every day in your life, like you said, and the idea of.

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Learning to be with grief is something I've actually never thought about personally, and I have lost people that are close to me, but that were elderly.

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And, I still have pain from that.

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But at the same time, I think. When you have a relationship with someone again like your brother, I can only imagine how much effort it took to walk through the first year, but not only that is the milestones that you go through every year.

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And then to create a different type of success is something that I am sure that shows up for you as giving him like a little nod to say, I'm living this life now.

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Absolutely. And, the moment I would not have completed my competition.

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So whoever has competed in the fitness industry, it'll be one of the hardest things with a nine month old baby that I think I've ever done.

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The. The cardio I was on, the lack of food that I was on, it was a challenge and I don't think people realized how much of a challenge it was for me because I put on a front.

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But had the experience not happened 12 weeks out of losing my brother, there is no way I would have ever done it because it was horrendous.

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But it was that motivator that my brother would be proud.

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And I know today he will be shining down on the person that I've become on helping people.

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He was also into the fitness industry, was very fit and healthy.

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And I know that just like my family, the person that I now am through, going through something that's very difficult, I'm just grateful is probably the wrong word, but how I've come and grow because but I always, through the times, I always believe that you have two options, in anything in life.

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And I truly believe this, you can either sit back and let that grief overtake you.

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And you're sad and you lose control of yourself, or you can use it as something that's going to help you get to where you want to be and find who you truly are.

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And I took that leap and neither were easy, right?

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Neither option. It's like your fitness industry, your fitness journey, sorry.

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You've either got an option to stay as you are, or you can take the change.

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It's not going to be easy staying as you are or moving.

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But I knew that if I took it as a motivator, if I wanted to make my brother proud, I needed to take that leap of faith.

26:53

So I feel with the business that you have created and the dynamic and change that you have created is leaving a legacy for the vacuum that is created through that grief process.

27:06

Would you say that as well to Jade? I take. My brother's always And I know that he would be standing wherever he is right now in life.

27:22

Proud as punch. God, don't get me emotional. I said it.

27:24

I won't cry. But yes, absolutely.

27:29

I think it's such a, like a beautiful way to, to bring him into the podcast and speak his name because I think, we, there's this song and it's a rap song and they talk about dying twice in life and we create a legacy for people too.

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And it's that time when people do pass, but it's also the second time we die is when we don't have our name heard again on this earth.

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And I think the legacy that you're creating is not only for you and your son to go out into the world, but you're keeping that part of his memory alive as well too.

28:07

I would definitely agree with you.

28:13

I feel so just.

28:16

grateful and gracious for everything that you give to not only me, I show up more on my socials and am able to have that ripple effect out to other women.

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So I just want to really share with you what a huge impact you are actually having on so many people without you even actually knowing it.

28:40

So thank you from. Me and my listeners and for all the women that you support through a line coaching.

28:47

And I would love for my listeners to feel like they can reach out and speak to you too.

28:53

I know that you do like a consult where people can come and talk to you and see what it's actually about to come and work with you through a line coaching.

29:01

Absolutely. So I just want to say also, thank you, honestly, for, I respect you for sharing everything today and your experience.

29:09

It means the world. And I don't always realize.

29:12

how much it means to my clients, because I don't I guess I would ask you Ro, if there were anyone listening today that resonated with everything you said, what would be the bit of advice that you would give them right now?

29:27

I think that you're worth it. You're always worth making time for.

29:32

And I think You know, it's really important to lean in and trust the right people and go with your gut, because I think that was something that I struggled with.

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And it just took me a little bit to really, open up and trust.

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And even now I still have some of those old scars that come up and I think it's just being reassured that you.

29:58

You can have a new relationship of trust with yourself again, even though it's been broken from many other experiences that it is possible to, yeah.

30:11

Thank you so much Jade for coming on the podcast.

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If anyone wants to find out more, I'll put everything in the show notes and you can follow Jade at Align Coaching on socials as well too.

30:24

Jade, thank you so much for your time.

30:27

And you can coach with Jade anywhere in the world.

30:29

You don't have to be UK based. I'm in Australia and we just make it work.

30:33

And yeah, I just thank you for everything that you've done.

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And I think you're amazing. Thanks Jade. Thanks so much for listening to Raising Up the podcast.

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And if you'd like to find out any extra information on show notes or how to work with me, head over to raisingup.

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com. au.