Episode Transcript
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Hey, it's Lulu. This is RadioLab, and I
0:50
am about to hit play on what
0:53
I think is an all-time favorite
0:55
RadioLab. It is certainly one we've
0:57
heard about from listeners over and
1:00
over again. It was
1:02
originally aired in 2011, and I'm not going
1:04
to say much more, except that we're
1:06
going to launch you into the story, and then
1:09
we have two pretty wild updates.
1:11
So think of this as a
1:13
trilogy, the Emily trilogy. Here
1:16
we go with part one in the
1:19
wall. Hey, wait, you're
1:21
listening. Okay. All
1:24
right. Okay. All
1:26
right. You're listening to RadioLab
1:30
from
1:33
WNYC.
1:39
Hey, I'm Jada Bumrod. I'm Robert Krillwich. This
1:41
is RadioLab today. Sort of a love story.
1:43
Here's the guy. My name is Alan Lundgaard.
1:45
Do you want to say anything
1:47
more than that? I don't know. Is this for like
1:49
a credit? Sometimes we'll walk down
1:51
the aisle and show you what people introduce
1:53
themselves. Oh, I don't know. I
1:56
don't have a title. Okay. All right. So that's
1:58
Alan. The Girl, Emily. The to
2:00
meet her a bit later for reasons
2:02
will become clear. The story begins on
2:04
a fall day. In. Brooklyn
2:06
so dame questions.
2:09
Guess who's the morning of October eighth? They're
2:12
both living in this one room loft in
2:14
Brooklyn and we woke up in you know
2:16
both twenty one when about or daily routine
2:19
and prepared to go. He was in art
2:21
school. she was taking some time off from
2:23
art school to work for a local artist
2:25
to she would take the bike and I
2:28
would take the train was a morning like
2:30
this abuse days in. Her son was loans
2:32
guys there's no long shadows. I stepped on
2:34
her helmet and just. Did it. took a
2:36
bite out for her weakest each other goodbye and
2:38
said i love you and I watch your i
2:40
down the street. In
2:43
the early morning and then and now on
2:46
I went down into the subway. Six.
2:49
Hours later, he's working in the studio
2:51
audience and sculpture. And
2:53
he gets a call. From. A
2:55
cop and. He. Said
2:57
Emily Garcia. She had an
2:59
accident. She's in Bellevue. This
3:01
is the address. And I
3:03
said oh I'm india have any more information he
3:05
just me that it was bad. I
3:09
was carrying a bunch of stuff in
3:12
his drop everything and start. A
3:17
Bill Allen and only had only been
3:19
together nine months but when it started
3:21
says Alan. It was
3:24
just so immediate. Late
3:26
they got together. they both just can a
3:28
new those. Sort of like a weird. Prosthetic.
3:32
Kind of thing where a single is the
3:34
first day that the schools had. A snow
3:36
day is no no is kind of like
3:38
this past blizzard sort of lake City shuts
3:40
down magical kind of thing. He'd
3:43
gone out with some friends. Just.
3:45
As the snow was coming down and we
3:47
was trapped at this party. And
3:50
that's where he bumped into Emily Pint
3:52
sized. These. big night
3:54
iridescent eyes and very
3:57
kind of his I
4:00
have trouble describing a voice. It's almost as if...
4:03
I know you guys are audio people, but it's
4:05
like stereo almost. Truth
4:08
is they've known each other for a while, but
4:10
that night, says Alan... Fireworks, all of a sudden,
4:13
and it felt right. So you had a
4:15
feeling this wasn't just a thing, this was
4:17
a thing. Right. Or the thing. The thing.
4:19
The thing. The thing. The
4:21
soul thing. Yeah. Well, Emily... There's
4:25
always been voice frown to Emily. That's Susan
4:27
Gassio, Emily's mom. She says at first, when
4:29
Emily told her about Alan, she thought, okay,
4:32
so that's another boy. Emily seemed to have
4:34
that effect on boys, perhaps because she didn't
4:37
really seem to need them. Here is
4:40
someone who's been obsessed with art,
4:42
and has given up everybody in
4:44
her life for art. At the
4:46
age of six... She was creating her own
4:48
comic books. In junior high school, she took
4:51
drawing classes every night, and then in high
4:53
school... She left us, friends, boyfriends...
4:55
To go to a high school of the
4:57
arts in Florida. No one stands in the
4:59
way of her art. It's all she sees, it's
5:01
all she focuses on. But then she
5:04
visited Emily in May a few months before the accident,
5:06
and she met Alan. I met
5:08
Alan, and he was delightful.
5:11
But there was a different look that I'd
5:13
never seen in Emily's eyes before when she
5:15
looked at him, and I
5:17
didn't like it. Tell
5:22
us about the accident from your perspective. I
5:26
was at work... You were in New Orleans? Metery,
5:28
which is a suburb of New Orleans. And
5:31
I get a telephone call, and I looked and
5:33
I thought, was Alan? Alan has never called
5:35
me before. I answered the
5:37
phone, I said, hello, Alan? And he said,
5:40
you have to come. Emily was hit
5:42
by a truck. An 18-wheeler semi-truck.
5:45
And I took a breath, and I said,
5:47
Alan, is Emily dead? And
5:50
he said, no, but you need to get here as
5:52
soon as possible. Six hours
5:54
later, her and her husband, Emily's dad, were at
5:56
Bellevue Hospital here in Manhattan. They brought us into the...
6:00
her Roman surgical ICU. We all went
6:02
in, she was just lying in bed.
6:04
And there were tubes. Tubes down her
6:06
throat. Coming in and out and her
6:09
face was so swollen. Emily covered in
6:11
blood. Weighed probably at the time
6:13
of the accident about 100 pounds and
6:15
she then weighed 128. She had swollen 28 pounds. She
6:21
had multiple fractures in her leg and her pelvis in
6:23
the left side of her face. They had opened
6:25
her abdomen and they had
6:28
taken her intestines out and put them on top
6:30
of her body so that she could breathe. And
6:32
she was just lying completely
6:35
still. You know. That
6:37
first 48 hours, nothing
6:40
moved. Nothing. We
6:42
took up shifts, you know. Her mother would
6:44
be there in the day and her father
6:46
in the evening and then I would be
6:48
there with her at night. Her eyes weren't
6:50
even flickering. And as she sat there watching
6:52
Emily not move, she says she kept thinking,
6:54
why? I've got these four kids and everything
6:56
bad seems to happen to Emily. Starting at
6:58
six months. Ear infections. Then
7:01
sinus infections. Then asthma. By
7:03
kindergarten Emily was losing her hearing for reasons
7:06
no one could quite figure out. She had
7:08
to get hearing aids. On both sides. But
7:10
somehow her mom says all this just made
7:12
Emily more fierce. If anyone can
7:14
conquer this, it's Emily. I think
7:16
on the second day they started
7:18
to take her off for medication expecting
7:20
to see some sort of reaction from
7:23
her. And.
7:27
It
7:31
was a nurse and
7:35
the nurse said that Emily was gone and
7:38
asked me about organ donations. And
7:42
I said yes. And so
7:45
I worked up enough courage to go into what they
7:47
call the track room which is where the residents
7:49
usually are. And there was one woman
7:52
resident sitting at a computer and I went and I
7:54
said, when are you going to let Emily go?
7:56
And she said, we will
7:58
have a family meeting. meeting tomorrow morning
8:02
and we'll talk then." And so
8:04
I said, okay, and I left and I went back
8:06
and I'm sitting with Emily,
8:08
inside of her bed, and
8:10
I'm telling her, Emily and I read the
8:12
book, The Bridge of San Luis Rey, when
8:14
she was a sophomore. And I
8:17
remember the ending of the book. There's
8:19
a land of the living, there's a land
8:21
of death, and the bridge
8:23
is love, and that love is the
8:26
only thing that survives, and it's kind of the way it
8:29
goes. And so I was sitting there with Emily
8:31
and I was telling this to, I was saying
8:33
this and talking in her ear and saying this
8:36
and talking to her and telling her that I
8:38
would love her eternally through all time, that our
8:40
love would never end. And
8:42
Emily raised her left hand. It
8:51
was chaos. I
8:54
was yelling for the nurse. I saw it. I saw
8:56
her move. That
8:58
was really one of the really
9:00
abrupt moments. Now,
9:03
they knew Emily was not dead. Emily
9:05
was alive. But how alive?
9:09
Over the next few days, says Alan, she
9:11
slowly started moving more, not
9:13
really in response to anything. She'd rise
9:15
in bed, scratch her leg where there
9:18
was a wound. We would hold her
9:20
hand down and she'd slap, she'd
9:22
slap our hands away. But
9:25
when they tell this to the doctors, the doctors
9:27
would say, that's not indicative of any kind of
9:29
mental functioning. Could just be a reflex,
9:31
really. So the medical team began
9:33
trying to determine just how damaged
9:35
was she. The ophthalmologist teams were coming
9:37
in and they were trying to get
9:39
Emily's eyes to our pupils
9:42
to respond and they weren't responsive. And
9:44
so I knew what that meant. What does that
9:46
mean? It meant she could be blind. So
9:49
Emily couldn't see, couldn't
9:51
hear. Because remember, she wore hearing aids. And why
9:53
didn't you just put those in? We tried. I
9:56
mean, we tried many times to put it in, but
9:58
she just wouldn't allow it. What would
10:00
you do exactly when you did it? Flail her
10:02
head, shake her around. Kick and she would hit.
10:04
Had a lot of bruises on my body where
10:06
she'd kicked me and pinched me. So we stopped.
10:09
Every once in a while we would go back to
10:11
it. But there
10:14
was the question, you know, maybe
10:17
she couldn't hear anymore. So what do you do
10:19
to a person who's... You don't know what's going
10:21
on inside her and you can't get to her?
10:23
You send her to a nursing home and, you
10:27
know, that's where she would have remained.
10:30
And after several weeks in the ICU...
10:33
Emily. She was stable. And that
10:35
meant they had to make
10:37
a decision. Once you become stable, then you have
10:39
to move off surgical ICU and out of the
10:41
hospital to either a rehabilitation or to a nursing
10:43
home. So that became the new question. Where would
10:45
she go? Could she be repaired, so to speak,
10:47
in which case she'd go to rehab? Or
10:50
is this it for her? In which case she'd
10:53
go to a nursing home. Now, making that
10:55
call medically... is sometimes
10:57
tricky. That's Dr. Michael Eisenberg. She's a
11:00
physician at NYU and it's her job
11:02
to make that call. And she
11:04
has one of the key criteria for getting someone
11:06
into rehab. To do rehab on somebody,
11:08
you need to have them reacting to
11:10
you. A person needs to be able
11:12
to participate in a meaningful way for
11:15
three hours of therapy a day. They
11:17
have to be able to follow commands
11:19
because that's how you rehabilitate someone. If
11:22
the person can't hear, if the person can't see,
11:25
then there's no way to communicate with her. And
11:28
so they made the
11:30
assessment that she could not
11:32
go to rehab. And that Emily should go
11:34
to a nursing home. So
11:39
I sent my husband back
11:42
to New Orleans to look for a nursing home. That
11:46
they could bring her back to. They just
11:49
kept it all secret from me that they were going to take her
11:51
away from me. I mean, how do you tell someone
11:53
who loves your daughter that much that we're taking
11:55
her away? But there was
11:57
not just one life that we had in our hands.
12:01
We felt that that would be the best
12:03
thing for him. And Alan
12:06
could hate us. Maybe
12:08
as a way for him to bridge
12:11
and let go for that grief. But
12:16
then, as the doctors were prepping Emily
12:18
to move her to a nursing home, they had to remove her
12:20
tracheotomy, which was helping her breathe. And
12:22
she all of a sudden started
12:24
talking. Really? She spoke,
12:26
yes. What was she saying? She
12:29
would curse. Don't touch me, you
12:32
blank-a-blank, you know. She would say, stop. This
12:34
is in response to someone touching her? Touching her. And
12:37
if she wasn't cursing, says Alan? She would
12:39
call everybody Miss Dashwood. Certain people that were
12:41
touching her were Miss Dashwood. What's...
12:44
Is it... From Sense and
12:46
Sensibility. But voting Jane Austen. Oh
12:49
yeah, we had watched the movie like a couple months
12:51
previous to this. So somehow she
12:53
was locked in the movie. And it
12:55
was just the assumption of the doctors
12:57
that she was just sort of mentally
12:59
damaged. But if she's calling people Miss
13:01
Dashwood, doesn't that at least mean something? No. It
13:04
wasn't enough to say that
13:06
Emily could follow a command like, sit up, raise
13:08
your right hand. So the plan was still the
13:10
nursing home. Right. I mean, no. Every
13:13
possibility had not been exhausted. I can see
13:15
him. He was sitting across
13:17
the room and his jaws were just
13:20
clenched. That was not going to give up. And
13:22
he was saying, you have to give her a
13:24
chance. She... You have to give her the
13:26
chance. Do you have a plan? No. I
13:29
had no plan whatsoever. No. I
13:31
was lost. This experience was just
13:34
completely traumatic to me emotionally. But
13:37
at the same time, I was going to help her in
13:39
whatever way I could. The only trajectory
13:41
I had was to help her. And
13:45
one night, just a few days before
13:47
Emily was going to be discharged to a nursing home,
13:49
away from him. I was there
13:51
alone with her at 3am or something. And she was calm. Like,
13:54
she wasn't trying to fight me away or anything. I had
13:56
helped her fix a thing that was wrong with her mouth.
14:00
Wiring it was like a wire that was poking her
14:02
and I fixed it for it and he says at
14:04
that moment Something occurred to him. It really just was
14:06
like in the recesses of my mind He thought of
14:08
the story of Helen Keller and Annie Sullivan. He'd read
14:10
about it a few days earlier online and he thought
14:13
Hmm. What if I tried what
14:15
Annie Sullivan did with Helen Keller on? Emily
14:19
I took her left hand with
14:21
my left hand and I leaned over
14:23
and using her Wrist is
14:25
the baseline for the words and
14:27
his finger is the pen. I just wrote I Waited
14:30
a second L waited a
14:32
second Oh Waited
14:34
a second V E Waited
14:39
a second you then
14:41
according to Alan. She said
14:43
to him. She said oh you love me. Thank
14:45
you She literally replied.
14:47
Yes, you replied immediately. She has does she know
14:50
who you know, she has no idea who I
14:52
am But
14:59
now we had a way to get to her so
15:01
he could figure out how much of her was actually
15:03
there and Maybe even prove
15:05
it to the doctors, you know, I had to
15:07
have something that was conclusive to present to them
15:09
the following evening. I Took
15:12
out my cell phone and it has
15:14
a record function on it and I started
15:16
recording Question
15:20
after question to determine her
15:22
cognitive ability. What
15:25
is your name? What
15:28
W H a T Hi
15:38
You fingers don't every letter. Yes Oh
15:50
But You
16:18
She's writing her name on the palm of
16:20
life. She
16:29
called me at 4 o'clock in the morning and said, You
16:31
have to come now. I have to preach. She
17:00
thought it was hers. Very good.
17:02
Very good. Very good. Emily,
17:05
very good. Very,
17:07
very good. Do you
17:10
know where you are?
17:14
Question mark. I don't know. I
17:17
don't know where I am.
17:19
Okay, right now I'm going
17:21
to write hospital. Got there
17:24
about 4 45 in the morning. Alan is over
17:26
there by the desk, continuing to finger spell and
17:28
talk to her. And she calls him Alan. She
17:33
knows that this person who is finger spelling on
17:35
her hand is named Alan. But
17:38
Alan can't get her to understand who he really is, that it's
17:40
her Alan. I'm just going to write my
17:42
name again, Alan. She just couldn't make
17:45
that mentally jump to connect her past
17:47
life with her present. Alan, Alan,
17:53
why in ethnicity are you? Are you Asian?
17:59
Am I Asian? and
18:01
tell her no. Next
18:04
thing I hear her say is, pull
18:07
me out of the wall. She
18:10
kept saying, pull me out. Please pull me out
18:12
of here. It's dark in here. Pull
18:14
me out. Help me. I know you can do
18:16
it. Pull me out of the wall. I
18:19
kept saying I can't. I would write
18:21
on her hand, I can't. Alan starts to
18:23
sob, and I'm crying to... What
18:26
are you thinking at this point? It wasn't enough. It
18:29
wasn't enough. And I said, Alan, ask
18:33
her about her hearing aid. And...
18:36
So he fingerspelled hearing aid. ...he was hearing
18:38
aid, and she said, okay. She
18:41
agreed to put the hearing aid in for the first
18:43
time. So we put it in and switched
18:45
it on. He
18:48
said, Emily... Emily, can you hear me? It's me,
18:50
Alan. And immediately...
18:54
Everything came back to me. I
18:56
was there, I remembered everything. The
18:59
door opened, and Emily stepped out. She
19:02
was back. Yeah, just by
19:04
hearing his voice. I knew it
19:06
was him, and I... And then
19:08
he said my mom was there. And I
19:11
heard her say what I had been waiting for
19:13
her to say all those weeks. I screamed, Mommy,
19:15
Mommy. She said, Mama. You know,
19:17
I couldn't believe I was there the whole
19:19
time. We asked
19:21
Emily, before she came back, where
19:24
was she? I didn't know where
19:27
I was, if I could see at all.
19:33
I mean, all I knew is that I was sleeping,
19:36
and I was always dreaming. She
19:38
says people would come to her in her dreams and say...
19:41
Don't touch that. Stop scratching your
19:43
wounds. My dreams, they'd blend
19:45
in with reality. She says she knew
19:47
somehow that there were people around her,
19:50
but she couldn't get to them, and that she also
19:52
knew she was in a dream. Why am I
19:54
still sleeping? That you couldn't somehow wake
19:56
up from. I felt helpless. really
20:00
helpless. Were you waiting
20:02
for someone like that? I mean, were you...
20:04
I was waiting for some
20:09
communication, you know?
20:18
And I was relieved. She's
20:24
a miracle to me. Emily
20:34
is now at the Rusk Institute, which is one
20:36
of New York City's leading rehab centers. And
20:39
on the day we visited her, she just
20:41
had a breakthrough. Today was the first
20:43
day I could stand on both legs and
20:46
walk. Actually walk.
20:50
I walked 100 feet today. After
20:52
rehab, she'll be moving into an apartment in
20:54
Lower Manhattan with Alan. She's
20:56
blind, and the chances for
20:58
seeing again are slim. But Alan
21:01
plans to spend his time helping her cope and
21:03
helping her find a new way to make art. Emily,
21:06
can you introduce yourself? Do you want me to say my name
21:08
is Emily? Yeah, just so we have it all on tape. They
21:10
asked me if I would have a title, and I couldn't think
21:12
of one, but I thought of one.
21:16
A title? Yeah, I'll do mine. My
21:19
name is Alan Lungard. I'm the boyfriend. My name is
21:21
Emily Gossio. I'm the girlfriend. You're the star of the
21:23
show. Oh, is that what I said? No. When
21:25
we come back, Emily's story continues. This dog is going to take it over.
21:49
Mine does not cost Pini and Italian, painful, 151. Hey,
21:52
Mendoises, where are you at? Oh, hey. Hi,
21:54
I'mwhitsand where? Shit. I don't call this
21:56
a wondering
22:00
where it all went. But there's
22:02
a question. If we were magically given
22:04
that time back, what would we do
22:06
with it? Perhaps you'd spend more time
22:08
with a friend that you've lost touch
22:10
with, or petting your dog, or just
22:12
noticing the sweetness of doing nothing. The
22:15
best way to let those special things into
22:17
your life is to know what's important to
22:19
you so you can make it a priority
22:21
going forward. A therapist can guide you through
22:23
the process of defining your values and understanding
22:25
your priorities so you know what things you
22:27
can spend your time on that will really
22:29
fulfill you. BetterHelp offers convenient, affordable
22:31
online therapy that comes to
22:33
you. Start the process in
22:35
minutes and switch therapists anytime.
22:37
Learn how to make time
22:39
for what makes you happy
22:41
with BetterHelp. Visit betterhelp.com/Radiolab today
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to get 10% off your
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first month. That's BetterHelp, help.com/Radiolab.
22:50
Radiolab is supported by the John
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making the latest discoveries in the
23:01
science of well-being, complexity, forgiveness, and
23:04
free will at templeton.org/podcast.
23:11
I'm Terrence McKnight. Join me for a
23:13
new season of the podcast where people
23:15
tell stories about the classical music that
23:17
shaped their lives. I'm Tom
23:19
Middleton. My name is Natalie Joachim. I'm
23:22
Maren Olsop and you're listening to
23:24
The Open Ears Project. You're
23:27
going to meet some incredible people and
23:29
maybe, like them, fall in love with
23:31
a piece of music. The
23:34
Open Ears Project, listen wherever you
23:36
get podcasts. Lulu
23:43
Radiolab, we are following the story
23:45
of Emily Gossio and a few
23:47
years after her accident from
23:50
her emergence from the wall that her
23:52
mind was trapped in. We
23:54
followed up with her and we'll
23:57
call this part, part two, Walking
23:59
through. Of all the
24:01
stories we've ever done, I think this one has gotten
24:03
the most response. And when we
24:06
left that story, Emily had emerged from the
24:08
coma and begun to recover, but
24:10
she was blind. Totally blind,
24:12
right? Yeah. And like no light,
24:14
nothing coming in? No. Okay.
24:17
Needless to say, it was a very big adjustment. I just, no,
24:20
I just had to develop my own ways
24:22
to navigate
24:25
throughout the world and trust myself.
24:28
And being a visual artist, she had
24:30
to develop new ways to draw. I had crayons,
24:33
and if you draw the crayons
24:36
hard enough, you can feel
24:38
the wax on the paper. Yeah.
24:42
But then one day in the summer of 2012, she gets a call.
24:46
From the Lighthouse School in New
24:48
York City. The Lighthouse School? Yeah. It's
24:51
the school for the blind. Her mom had found out
24:54
that they were trying out this brand new technology.
24:56
I think they were doing the study for the
24:58
FDA. Very experimental. Her mom signed her
25:00
up. Long story short, Emily shows up to the
25:02
Lighthouse School one day and walks into this room,
25:05
and a guy named Ed gives
25:07
her this thing. He gives me his device. Can
25:09
you describe it? I mean, is it a big helmet? No, it's
25:11
not. It's just like
25:13
a regular pair of
25:15
sunglasses. Though they were a
25:17
little heavier than your normal sunglasses, she says,
25:20
because right on the front, like on the
25:22
bridge of the nose, was a little camera
25:24
pointing forward. And then attached to
25:27
the sunglasses was a little wire. That
25:29
ran out of the camera and down to
25:31
this little square piece of metal. I think it's
25:33
made out of titanium. And it's
25:36
just like the size of a postage stamp.
25:39
Or a little bit thicker, though. Ed
25:41
explained to her that a little piece of
25:43
titanium was filled with thousands of electrodes. And
25:46
what was going to happen is that the camera
25:48
was going to convert images into patterns of electricity
25:50
on that little square. So he told her to
25:52
take the little square. Put it on your tongue.
25:54
Put it right on the center of your tongue.
25:57
And close your mouth. So
26:00
I put it on and they turned
26:02
it on. And
26:06
it was like, it
26:08
started to tickle. Imagine
26:10
a lot of Coca
26:13
Cola, like a lot of
26:15
bubbles on your tongue, and
26:17
always like, prickly, prickly
26:19
feeling. The idea
26:21
behind this thing, according to science writer Sam Keene,
26:24
author of The Tale of the Dueling Neurosurgeons, is
26:26
that we actually see with our brain, not our
26:28
eyes. I mean, it might seem like our eyes
26:30
are doing the seeing, and our ears are doing
26:33
the hearing, and our fingers and tongue are tasting
26:35
the touching, but that's actually not how it works.
26:38
Each of our senses sends signals into the
26:40
brain as electricity, little
26:42
blips on nerves. And it is the brain
26:45
that then converts those little blips into what
26:47
you perceive as a sight or a sound
26:49
or a smell. Now, obviously, someone
26:51
who is blind, their retina, is not sending those signals
26:53
anymore. But what if
26:55
there is another way to get signals
26:58
for light and dark and color into our
27:00
brains? In all of our brains, there are
27:02
lots and lots of pathways going from every
27:04
part of the brain to every other part
27:06
of the brain. And normally, your brain isn't
27:09
using those pathways, even though they exist. It's
27:11
like there's a road there, but it's shut
27:13
down and traffic can't be on it. But
27:17
what if you could open up some of those rats? He
27:20
just let me sit with it
27:22
on for an hour or two hours. Emily
27:25
says at first she had no idea what was happening.
27:27
She would just swivel her head around and feel the
27:29
patterns on her tongue change. And every
27:31
time I looked around, he'd say, Oh,
27:34
that's a chair. That's a door. That's
27:38
me. That's your mom. And
27:40
it went on like this for a while. Ed showed her
27:42
a ball and a square. A plastic
27:44
banana. Nothing was really happening for
27:47
her except for the prickly feelings on her tongue. But
27:50
then there was this moment. Ed had
27:52
this really long styrofoam rod, and
27:55
he flashed it in front of me.
27:57
He moved it up and down in front
27:59
of my head. face and
28:01
I was like oh my god what was that? Suddenly
28:04
she says she just saw it. I
28:07
was like oh my god it just
28:09
happened on its own. What
28:12
did it look like? In some of my mind's
28:14
eye it looks like a
28:16
long white skinny stick.
28:19
Could you see the texture of the stick? No
28:23
I couldn't see texture I couldn't
28:25
see in three dimensions.
28:27
It was very flat. It was kind
28:29
of like that kid's
28:32
toy light bright. So
28:35
imagine like a black screen and
28:37
little tiny white dots. All
28:40
arranged in a line. So
28:43
Emily was allowed to keep the brain port device
28:45
for about a year and a half and during
28:47
that time the light bright resolution of it did
28:49
get better as her brain learned
28:52
to speak tongue. It was awesome. When
28:55
I saw the people moving. And one
28:57
of the things that really struck me in our
28:59
conversation was I asked her about this video that
29:02
her mom had sent me showing her wearing the
29:04
device and walking down the street. She
29:07
told me that usually you know now that she's blind
29:09
when she's walking down the streets of New York City.
29:11
Especially uptown where the streets are
29:13
a lot wider. She
29:15
says people see her in her white cane and
29:18
walk a really wide circle around her. So
29:20
I yeah I hardly
29:23
ever notice other people walking
29:25
around me. It feels like I'm
29:28
just walking alone. I can
29:32
always hear the traffic and the sounds
29:34
of traffic but not
29:36
other people. But she says when she
29:38
put the device on and put that little sensor in her tongue
29:42
the sidewalk came
29:45
alive. I thought it was amazing
29:47
like I didn't know
29:49
this many people were on the street at
29:51
the same time as me. So now they're
29:54
all they're all there
29:56
again. Which she described them in a way that
29:58
sounded. almost
30:00
like a painting. Like
30:04
really soft blotches. Everything
30:08
was really soft, like soft blotches
30:10
of ink that
30:13
could move. They
30:16
were walking and I could see their legs moving
30:18
and I could see them, their gait. But
30:21
I couldn't see them clearly, like I couldn't see
30:24
their features or whether
30:26
they were wearing a shirt or a shorts
30:28
or dress. It
30:30
appears that you just see their
30:33
shadows and every
30:35
now and then I see the light casted on
30:37
them. Really? Yeah. I
30:42
imagine somehow like underwater creatures. Uh-huh.
30:46
Squishy jellyfish like. Yeah.
30:51
Yeah, like lighting up. Yeah,
30:56
like that. Yeah. And
31:08
that for Emily is what it's
31:10
like to translate the city with your tongue. New
31:14
York City becomes this, uh, hazy
31:16
sea of walking
31:19
fish that make
31:21
their way along in the sunshine. So,
31:43
it's been a full decade since
31:46
that last update with Emily and
31:48
she has been busy. She completed
31:50
an MFA program at Yale and
31:53
the artworks she's been making have
31:55
been shown in museums and galleries
31:58
across the world, including exhibit
32:00
that just opened at the Queens
32:02
Museum in New York City. We
32:05
sent producers to do Niyama Sambandan to
32:07
Emily's home in the Upper East Side,
32:11
where she lives with her partner
32:14
Kirby and London, her
32:18
guide dog, to talk
32:20
with Emily about what's been on her
32:22
mind, her tongue, her heart
32:24
these days. So like in the second
32:27
episode it was about that like
32:29
sunglass like tongue device. I
32:31
haven't used that in years, but it
32:33
was fun to experiment
32:35
with. Was there a reason you stopped
32:37
using it? I just found
32:40
that drawing with my hands, tactile
32:43
drawings was a lot easier
32:45
and more freeing than trying
32:48
to like look
32:50
at something through my tongue,
32:54
you know. Sometimes
32:56
it would give me headaches
32:58
too, it just was
33:00
too swell for me. Is
33:05
there any other tools that are helpful to
33:07
you in your art making process? I
33:12
have a rubber pad drawing
33:15
board, so when I place my
33:17
paper over the rubber padding and
33:20
I draw into it using a ballpoint pen, the
33:23
lines of my drawing will pop up and
33:25
so I'm tracing the line
33:27
of my drawing with my left hand as I draw with
33:30
my right hand. And
33:32
so I can, I feel like I'm looking,
33:35
I can see what I'm
33:37
doing as I'm doing it.
33:40
The color on my drawing
33:42
is using Crayola crayons and I was able
33:44
to organize them by putting each
33:46
crayon into their own separate envelope
33:49
that I put a real label on so that
33:53
I can pick and choose which colors
33:55
I want to use. But
33:58
before that I had a I
34:01
created a color journal with
34:03
these Crayola crayons and I asked
34:05
Kirby to describe each color to
34:07
me and then I associated that
34:10
color to a memory. That
34:12
way I'm able to clearly visualize
34:15
the Crayola colors I'm using. Do
34:17
you have that with you? Do
34:19
you know where it is, Kirby? My color
34:22
journal? I'm going to look at the effects here.
34:25
I mean, that's just amazing. So it's just like memories
34:28
connected to each color or each color
34:30
has a memory and there's how many
34:32
of them? In
34:34
my journal I have 90 on wrappers. Oh
34:40
my gosh, wow. Okay, here's the journal. It's like
34:42
this little gray book. What
34:45
is one? Okay. Denon
34:47
is the Crayola name and then it
34:50
says ilk made. Oh,
34:52
sorry. The Crayola
34:54
crayon is named Denon and my
34:57
memory of milk made the Vermeer
35:01
painting and she joined this
35:03
blue blouse over her dress and it
35:06
was just the most beautiful blue I
35:09
can remember seeing. Okay,
35:12
I'll just do a couple more. Above I think it
35:14
says like C2 Dallas? Is it
35:16
Dallas? Oh, I see. One
35:20
of my favorite movies is the fifth element. Okay. And
35:24
so Lulu Dallas is
35:26
the main character in this
35:29
movie and she has really
35:32
awesome orange hair. When
35:37
you say that, do you see that moment in your head? Yes.
35:40
And I guess you see Sunset Orange orange.
35:43
Yeah. This
35:45
time I'm going to read the memory and then you can
35:47
tell me the color. My
35:49
hair summer 2005. Oh,
35:53
that's midnight blue. Yeah.
35:58
Does your experience of being a the wall ever show
36:00
up in your work? I
36:03
don't know. No, not at all.
36:06
Um, so is that
36:09
a period of time where you don't really make
36:11
art about it? Oh no, no
36:13
I never make art about it. No. Why?
36:17
Um, it's just,
36:19
I feel like I really just
36:22
want to leave it all behind. Yeah,
36:25
right now my work is
36:28
really centered around memories
36:30
and dreams and also
36:33
the intersectionality of the
36:35
experience of disabled people
36:37
and animals. Um,
36:40
and it also focuses on
36:42
love and intimacy and
36:45
co-partnerships. I'd
36:48
love to talk about your exhibit at the Queen's Museum.
36:50
Alright, I'm going to just cut in here for
36:52
a second to describe Emily's most recent exhibit, which
36:55
is currently at the Queen's Museum in New York
36:57
City. You can go check it out. And
36:59
so you walk into this room and there
37:02
are these three big white
37:04
dogs standing on their hind legs. They're
37:06
made out of paper mache. And
37:09
each one of them is holding
37:11
a leash up in their paw
37:13
that's connected to this walking stick,
37:15
this giant walking stick that they're
37:17
all sort of dancing around,
37:19
almost like a maypole. And at
37:21
their feet are all these paper
37:23
mache flowers in red and magenta
37:25
and pink. And around them are
37:28
these giant paper mache trees. Um,
37:32
and the whole thing is called other-worlding. What
37:34
does this show mean for you? Uh,
37:37
the show to me is a
37:39
celebration of my relationship
37:42
with London. London and I
37:44
have been working together for over
37:46
a decade. The three
37:48
sculptures of London are human scale. Um,
37:52
we kind of take dimensions from my
37:55
body and London's body and mesh
37:57
them together. There's
38:00
London. There's London. Tell me
38:02
more about London. Yeah, London is a
38:04
blonde English Labrador and she is 13
38:07
and a half years old. She's
38:12
my first guide dog and she
38:15
changed my life in many
38:17
ways. When
38:20
we're together, I feel like we've
38:22
become this super organism in some
38:25
ways. She and I are
38:27
going back and forth between
38:29
a maternal and a
38:31
spousal relationship. It's
38:34
a relationship built on
38:36
interdependence. I'm curious
38:39
what specific moments you can think of
38:41
with London that really inspired this
38:43
piece. In
38:46
the beginning of our relationship, when
38:49
we're just starting to bond together,
38:51
which is a really important process
38:53
of your relationship with a
38:55
guide dog is the bonding. I
38:58
would turn on music. London
39:03
would press around me, wagging
39:05
her tail and I hold my arms out
39:07
to her and she'd jump up and
39:11
put her paws in my hands and
39:13
we kind of like stomp
39:16
around to the music
39:18
together. So
39:22
in a way, I feel like what
39:24
really carried me through all
39:27
these years is these foundations
39:29
of love that I've had
39:31
from my partner of London
39:33
and Kirby. London
39:35
and Kirby. Yeah, Kirby and London,
39:37
you know? If
39:40
you want to make it in alphabetical order. London
39:43
and Kirby, for
39:45
sure. We're a team. All
39:53
right, that'll do it for today. Thank
39:55
you so much for tuning in. We'll
39:58
be back in two weeks. With
40:00
more. Radio
40:05
Lab was created by Jad Abumrod and
40:07
is edited by Sorin Wheeler. Lulu Miller
40:09
and Lassif Nasser are our co-hosts. Dylan
40:12
Keefe is our Director of
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Sound Design. Our staff includes
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Simon Adler, Jeremy Bloom, Becca
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40:21
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Niana Sambumdum, Matt
40:29
Kielse, Annie McEwen, Alex
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Sneason, Sara Khari, Sarah
40:33
Sandbach, Arianne Wack, Pat
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Walters, Ollie Webster. Our
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fact checkers are Diane Kelly, Emily
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Krieger, and Natalie Middleton. Let's go!
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Yeah! I always want to do
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this. Hi,
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I'm Erica Inyankers. Leadership
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support for Radio Lab Science Programming
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