Ryan R. is a 24-year-old non-binary lesbian. In Ryan’s case, that means that though they are lesbian and like to date women, they don’t identify with being a girl, a woman, or, with the attributes of traditional femininity.

It was a discovery that Ryan made after dating boys in high school, faking physical attraction to males at the time, and then discovering their true gender identity in college and afterwards.

“I don’t feel like the words girl or woman describe me,” Ryan tells PFLAG’s Rick Koonce in this wide-ranging interview. Ryan goes on to say that being non-binary means different things to different people, but, in their case, has given them the freedom to pursue both personal relationships -- and their continuing discovery of self -- without feeling hemmed in by traditional gender roles or social expectations.

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