0:00

Up next Out Wow what you don't know

0:02

called part of the Gang, which switch actually football.

0:05

I don't know about you, but I need a break

0:07

from politics, so we're gonna do something

0:10

fun and a little different this week. Trust

0:13

me, you will want to stick around. This is

0:15

Out Loud with Gianna Callblow. Welcome

0:26

Back to Allow with Gianno Caldwell. I got

0:28

a very special show for you guys this week. For

0:31

the first time, I'm having on two guests. They're

0:33

good friends of mine. I've been to their

0:35

homes, spend time with them, and

0:37

they are great, great people. I'm talking about

0:39

Mike Hill and Cynthia Bailey Hill, a

0:42

power couple have been mary since October of

0:44

last year. Mike is a veteran broadcaster

0:46

and television personality who currently works

0:49

at Fox Sports and the Black News Channel.

0:51

He's also the author of Open Mic ran

0:54

On, his memoir about his life that came

0:56

out last year. His wife, Cynthia,

0:58

is a model, actress and reality star from

1:01

the Real Housewives of Atlanta Today.

1:03

I want to talk to them about all things relationships.

1:05

Plus I want to get into the entertainment industry

1:08

and maybe get some inside scoops about

1:10

their life in the limelight. But before we go

1:12

there, we're about to address the

1:14

national debate about racing police shootings

1:17

that is raging across the country. Let's

1:19

go. I am so honored to

1:22

welcome Mike Hill and Cynthia

1:24

Hill Bailey. Yeah,

1:26

I know, we in here. We here.

1:32

If I can tell you how many times we say

1:35

that to each other, like

1:38

any time your name comes up for the rest of

1:40

the day, no matter what, we always say,

1:42

we're in here. I'm

1:46

so excited that I made such a great impact on

1:49

your lives, so so

1:51

thankful for that. So this

1:53

episode is extremely special to me.

1:56

It's about relationships, It's about love,

1:58

and it's something that you all know so much

2:01

about, having had relationships

2:04

and years of experience and so much

2:06

knowledge that you're gonna drop on us today, so

2:08

much that I'm expecting to learn. But before we get

2:10

started there, I wanted to just

2:12

talk about what's going on in the moment in

2:15

our country, whereas we have a

2:18

number of police involved shootings that have occurred,

2:20

We're still in the Derek Chauvin trial

2:23

from his murdering of George

2:25

Floyd, and we're

2:27

the temperature is really high right

2:29

now, and rightfully so I

2:31

would argue because there needs to

2:33

be something done. We need police reform. There

2:35

has to be solutions, and I wanted to get each

2:37

of your takes on what's going

2:39

on in this moment and what could we potentially

2:42

do to end it till folks

2:44

can feel safe and we

2:46

can just live together as a united community.

2:50

Well that's the tough question because I think

2:52

if we actually had the solutions, we

2:54

probably started working towards them. But I think

2:56

from our side, I think from

2:59

UH, as a black man who's been

3:01

pulled over and been harassed, who's

3:03

been profiled before, I think

3:06

the first step is, you know, I think

3:08

the police. And I'm not saying white police,

3:11

I'm not saying black police. I think it's the blue I don't

3:13

think it's a black white issue. Most of the time when it comes

3:15

to police relations with African

3:17

American people, I think it's more

3:19

of a blue issue because a lot of

3:22

times, and I don't know if it's training, I don't know if

3:24

it's just the mindset, but we're

3:26

viewed as a threat automatically.

3:29

We've even heard policemen say that

3:31

before. When they go into certain neighborhoods, they

3:34

fear automatically

3:36

and and that needs to start there.

3:38

They need to see us as

3:41

humans and not as somebody

3:43

they can pick up and and and get

3:46

points for, you know, doing their

3:48

job or whatever or whatever you call that, or

3:50

you know, or just feel like we're automatically

3:53

out there to get them, We're doing something

3:55

wrong. There's an issue in this country

3:58

when uh,

4:00

three times as many black men

4:02

and women are killed by police

4:04

officers than white people, uh

4:07

and a lot of times many

4:09

times they're unarmed. We've seen that,

4:11

as you mentioned with George Floyd. We've

4:14

seen that with Dante

4:16

right just moments, you know, not too long ago.

4:18

We've seen it with Eric Garnand we've seen it so

4:21

many times and so many names. We can say

4:23

their names over and over again. But

4:26

for the smallest infractions

4:28

as well. It could be a

4:31

tail light, it can be lucy cigarettes,

4:33

it can be allegations

4:35

of a counterfeit twenty dollar bill. So

4:38

until I think the police black

4:40

white indifference Latino start seeing

4:43

us as humans and not just a threat,

4:46

I think we're gonna have this problem. So we're gonna

4:48

have police perform whatever we need to do, train and

4:50

get rid of some of the bad cops.

4:53

And when you bring in the new cops.

4:56

They have to have the right

4:58

mentality, in the right attitude

5:01

towards Black people to see

5:03

us the way we need to be seen, and

5:06

that's as human beings and not as a threat.

5:08

Right. And um, I would agree with

5:11

my husband on this one. You know, for the

5:13

most part, I think one of the most important

5:15

things we can do is do what we're doing

5:17

with you just keep the conversation going, you

5:19

know what I'm saying. Um, you know, keep

5:22

posting about to keep talking about it. Um,

5:25

I've been around for a long time. I will say

5:27

this is the first, you know, since the movement,

5:29

Like all these things have been happening for

5:31

years, okay, just on different

5:33

levels and just you know, just not

5:37

you know, just worst video footage. The video footage

5:39

has gotten better, but it's still the same videos

5:42

of people just and justice happening

5:45

over and over again to black

5:47

folks. So I would

5:49

say, we got to just keep talking about it, and we gotta

5:51

keep protesting, and we have to keep bringing it

5:53

up, and we have to keep putting electing

5:55

people, putting you know, different people in place

5:58

that can reper s black

6:00

people to try to make effective change,

6:02

and just you know, keep

6:05

the conversation going as parents

6:07

of young adults who drive.

6:10

Um, you know, going back to what Mike was saying about

6:13

like it could be the most I mean,

6:15

basically, no one could run a stop

6:17

sign, get pulled over, and literally be

6:20

in fear of just something

6:22

a simple arrest or

6:25

you know, a warning

6:27

or anything going to the left if she

6:29

didn't comply in a certain way or they

6:31

didn't feel like she complied in a certain way.

6:34

And Mike, you know, used the word you know,

6:36

they see us. He used the word threat. He

6:38

said that they see us a threat. Sometimes I don't feel

6:40

like some of these situations are even seen

6:42

as a threat. Like if I'm a grown,

6:44

fifty four year old black woman, if

6:47

I'm driving my car and I see blue

6:49

lights behind me, I'm I

6:52

will immediately go into panic mode. I don't

6:54

have any warrants, I've broken any

6:56

laws, but I just feel like I

6:58

live in Atlanta, Georgia. Uh

7:01

if I get the wrong police officer

7:04

to pull me over for whatever reason,

7:07

as someone who has no criminal history,

7:09

who has no reason to be afraid, I

7:12

am honestly afraid.

7:15

I'm praying that I get a good cop

7:17

that is going to treat me with respect,

7:20

asked me for my credentials, run

7:22

my tax whatever, tell me what I

7:24

did wrong, and send me on my way as to

7:27

it ending up going left or

7:29

being tased or shot for

7:31

no reason. And then that's and

7:33

that piggyback and off of that is

7:36

that's the problem, is that we

7:38

shouldn't be in fear of somebody that we pay

7:41

with our tax dollarge us to protect

7:43

and serve us. We shouldn't have that fear,

7:45

but we do. And it's not something new, and

7:48

people think, you know, it's something new,

7:50

and we're screaming and yelling. We're screaming and yelling because

7:52

it's been happening our entire lives.

7:54

It's just now being exposed because

7:56

of social media. Everybody has a camera

7:58

phone of course obvious slee uh. Police

8:01

officers have their body cams now, so

8:03

it's being exposed and put out there

8:05

in the open. But you know, other things get

8:07

rid of qualified immunity. Maybe I don't know

8:09

if it's completely defunding the

8:11

police, but it definitely needs to be reformed.

8:14

There needs to The George Floyd Act

8:17

needs to be passed in Congress because

8:19

if there's a bad cop that's doing bad things, and he

8:21

gets fired from a position

8:23

in one city, shouldn't just be able

8:25

to go to another city and get another job. So there

8:27

needs to be that database. So there are a lot

8:30

of different issues that

8:32

need to be rectified. I

8:34

don't know if I have the correct

8:37

answer to answer your question, but there's

8:39

a lot and uh, we we we.

8:42

There has to be a change because it can't go on

8:44

for long, and accountability first

8:47

and foremost. So when you talk about accountability,

8:50

the reason why a lot of black people are

8:52

upset is not only because we're being killed

8:55

in the streets. Unarmed black people are

8:57

being killed in the streets. And I'm not saying that everybody

9:00

they gets pulled over doesn't deserve to go to jail,

9:02

because they do. There's people if if you're committing

9:04

to crime, you're doing something wrong and you

9:06

threaten the police in any kind of way, or if you got

9:08

a weapon or whatever. I get that, But

9:11

we want the same treatment that we

9:13

see our white counterparts getting.

9:15

We want that equality and we want accountability.

9:18

So if somebody does do something

9:21

wrong and they get charged, we want an indictment

9:23

first and foremost. Didn't have that with

9:25

the Brianna Taylor, we didn't get the we didn't

9:28

get the charges. But

9:30

we also have seen numerous times

9:32

where somebody that could kill a

9:35

black person who was unarmed,

9:38

get off and not even be charged. Eric Garner's

9:40

situation, his copies, his the

9:42

copass is, you know, back on the

9:44

force. I mean, so you see those

9:46

types of things happening and you wonder

9:48

why. So that's why it's important

9:51

for this Derek Chauvin trial. Um,

9:56

I'm praying, I'm praying that

9:58

there's accountability in that case. I'm

10:00

praying there's some sense of accountability

10:03

when it comes to the Dante

10:05

Rights situation in some ways, because

10:07

once I think the police

10:10

officers start seeing that they're having

10:12

to pay for their

10:16

transgressions, then

10:18

that will deter others, hopefully

10:21

from committing the same crimes, because if they

10:23

feel like they can do it and get away with

10:25

it, they're going to continue to be bold, continue

10:28

to be aggressive, continue to brutalize black

10:30

people in these streets. And uh,

10:33

it's just not a good thing at all. Yeah,

10:35

and and and just in closing, if

10:40

these police officers feel

10:42

so bold

10:45

and so comfortable doing

10:48

the things that we have seen them

10:50

do when they know

10:52

they're being video, what in God's

10:54

name doing that we don't

10:56

see you have been doing for years?

10:58

You know what I'm saying, What if no one's there

11:01

take what if we don't have the video footage?

11:03

What if they feel that comfortable

11:06

doing the things that they

11:09

have done and they know

11:11

it's being filmed. I can't imagine

11:14

what happens when it's not being filmed

11:16

and they actually make it to the police

11:18

station, Like what

11:21

what are the boundaries? Like? What?

11:23

Like I I just I mean, thank

11:25

god we actually have video footage, because

11:28

if we didn't, you know, then

11:31

what and what happens when it's not being video

11:35

That's what I'm saying that so so in Bolden, you see

11:37

Derek Chauvin, no one's being taped, he

11:39

still put his hand in his pocket and

11:41

still do it. I mean that's like we're

11:44

just he's just smirking right in your face. That hurts

11:47

that that is you know, that's throwing salt

11:49

in the wound. Were like, I know what

11:51

I'm doing and I'm getting away with and there's

11:54

nothing you can do about it. It was

11:56

literally almost smiling anyway, Hey,

11:58

I know this is doing I know this is wrong.

12:00

You know that this is despicable but

12:04

I don't care. What are you guys gonna do about

12:06

it? Nothing that change.

12:08

They do not fear us, they do not respect

12:11

us, and they do not value us, and

12:13

that has to change. Well,

12:15

thank you all for sharing your thoughts

12:17

on that, and certainly that I agree

12:19

with a number of your points there.

12:22

And I've had experiences myself, and

12:24

of course I have no criminal background or anything

12:26

like that. But even when I go get my driver's license,

12:29

I make sure that I have a fresh

12:31

haircut. I wear a suit and

12:33

a tie, and I smile. So

12:36

if someone pulls me over and they see my ID,

12:38

they think a little deeper

12:40

about who I might be or

12:43

because it's not typical to have a

12:45

suit on and smiling in your in your

12:48

I d especially with

12:50

some some of the mean to cut

12:52

y'all Giano, they don't even wait to see your

12:54

identification. They pull you over and they're

12:56

automatically look Lieutenant

12:58

Nazario, the person of Virginia.

13:01

You know, he didn't have a tax on

13:03

his on the back, but he had him in the window.

13:05

And he pulls over and he feels like his

13:08

life is in danger. He feels scared. He pulls

13:10

over in a lit area and

13:13

the police officers already uh

13:15

in aggressive mode because he sees

13:18

that face. George Floyd is sleeping

13:20

in the clock car at the time, and

13:22

the cop already has his gun out,

13:24

so before he can even present any

13:26

kind of identification, all

13:28

they see is the black face you know so,

13:31

and and and and then that's another thing after

13:33

And I don't mean to cut you off, John, I know who You're not gonna

13:35

try and take over your podcast, bro, But

13:38

it's it's it's it's it's that

13:40

that that's the problem is once again, it's

13:42

like they it's jumping to the conclusions

13:44

before we can even identify

13:47

ourselves to find out who we are. And then even

13:49

after you get arrested, you

13:51

get brutalized, you get killed. Then automatically

13:54

there is another assassination

13:56

that happens, the character assassination

13:58

that happens afterwards. We because they bring up everything

14:01

in your past that had nothing to do with

14:03

this particular situation that you

14:05

were in at that moment. So all

14:08

of that is a big reason why and I

14:10

understand why you're doing it, but you shouldn't

14:12

have to. You shouldn't have to. And

14:15

that's the problem, Giano, is that you shouldn't

14:17

have to go and get a haircut. You shouldn't

14:20

have to go that's true. That's true, and I don't

14:22

disagree with you on that point. I know that

14:25

for folks that are listening right now, there's gonna

14:27

be folks who agree with what you're saying, and they're

14:29

gonna disagree. I think I agree,

14:31

and I've said to conservatives I said on Fox

14:34

News where individuals

14:37

it has nothing to do with the background. I shouldn't

14:39

be hearing about what George Floyd did in this criminal

14:41

past. I don't care about that. I don't care

14:43

about their being drugs in this system. What I

14:45

do care about it there was an officer who did something

14:48

that was against this code of conduct. So I

14:50

hear that completely. So what I'm hearing

14:52

to summarize the US point of view is we need

14:54

to have the conversation, continue to talk about

14:56

it, continue to lift our voices and

14:58

use our platforms. And although I may

15:00

not agree with everything that you two have said,

15:03

I do agree that there's a necessity

15:05

to have the conversation started. I think the police

15:08

departments need to be reformed. I don't think the police

15:10

departments need to be defunded, especially coming from

15:12

where I come from on the South side of Chicago, not

15:15

having police could be a death sentence

15:17

because we got our own people killing each other

15:20

um as well, So that's a that's another consideration.

15:23

So you know, this is one of those times where

15:25

I think we all do need to united as a country

15:27

and speak out against um

15:30

police misconduct and

15:32

and and violence. We gotta really be legitimately

15:34

have legitimate conversations around it and look

15:36

to make changes and leave politics out of

15:39

it. So that's what I personally

15:41

believe, and I think you offer your your thoughts

15:43

on that now as we go

15:46

into something that's a little bit more of a lighter

15:54

part of it. And my wife

15:56

said she wasn't gonna say that much about it, but she got

15:58

a lot to say.

16:01

I don't I personally, you

16:03

know, don't

16:07

you know it's upsetting every time, you

16:09

know, just even talk about it, because then it makes

16:11

me think about the news news

16:13

clips and the videos, and I'm like,

16:16

and then it just makes me upset. So no, I don't

16:18

want to consume myself with seven

16:21

because it's it's depressing.

16:23

It's very depressing, very depressing.

16:26

So anyway, moving on to relationship

16:28

talk, we're

16:31

talking to Mike Hill and Cynthia Bailey here on the

16:33

Outloue with gianno Conwell we've got much

16:36

more with them, ACTI quick, right, thank

16:43

you all for coming on to educate

16:45

us on and you know what your experiences

16:47

at Madam and relationships. And you all

16:50

are obviously a power couple.

16:52

You're on television every day. Um,

16:55

you're you're very viral. You're on

16:57

the Real Housewives of Atlanta and I

16:59

think is the number one out of the entire franchise

17:02

for Bravo. So this is this

17:04

is a really good time to understand your story

17:07

and what you all have

17:09

gone through and experiences, your challenges outside

17:12

of each other and with each other. And of course, Mike,

17:14

you wrote a book called Open Mic where

17:16

you talk deeply given your perspective

17:19

on relationships. But let's start from the very

17:21

beginning. So a logical

17:23

place would be to start with how you

17:25

all met, And let's

17:27

let's kick that off. Mike, go ahead, Well,

17:30

we we met in the most unconventional way. We

17:32

actually met on the Steve Harvey

17:35

Show when he had a talk show on NBC.

17:37

He was doing a dating segment, UH

17:39

and A, and he had Cynthia

17:42

on the show before. He's a good friend of Cynthia's

17:44

and he wanted to help Cynthia out with her dating

17:46

life. I was on a dating

17:48

app and he's old school. Steve is

17:51

old school. He was like, what the hell are you doing on dating

17:53

app? You don't need to be on dating ap. You

17:55

know, I got I know plenty of brothers that would

17:57

blood to go out with you, So, you know, joking

18:00

around, I was like, well, if you think you can do a better job

18:02

than find me somebody and I can then go

18:04

for it. Joking, you know, I didn't

18:06

know fast Forward I would actually

18:09

actually be doing his dating pool. Yeah.

18:11

So, so there was a producer that reached out and I

18:13

was doing fast Sports radio and

18:15

reached out to a friend of mine or my co host

18:17

at the time, and said, hey, you know

18:20

what, might be interested in doing a dating show,

18:22

um and meet one of the real housewives of Atlanta. My

18:24

first question was which one, because

18:28

obviously, because not all of them

18:30

would have gotten my attention. But when he

18:32

said Cynthia, I'm like, okay, cool, Yeah, go on there.

18:36

Well that

18:38

goes without saying that goes without saying

18:40

I just you know, you know, everybody knows Cynthia Bailey's

18:43

to find is the most classy one of all the Housewives

18:45

franchises, but now not true. It really is

18:47

you, my baby, I can say that, but you

18:49

know, so I went on there and I

18:51

didn't expect much. I didn't think Cynthia Bailey was

18:54

going on there looking for real love. I thought it was

18:56

just some kind of publicity things. So I was going to go

18:58

along with it and uh, the whole

19:00

Obviously, I won the dating pool

19:03

and went there, and yeah, but

19:05

it was a slow burn, right, baby, wasn't well. The

19:07

crazy thing is my PR

19:09

team didn't want me to actually

19:11

do the segment. I was on

19:14

Steve Show promoting Housewives at

19:16

the time, and we were just playing around and

19:18

then when they went his when

19:21

people circled back, and I was like, hey, we really would

19:23

like for Cynthia to come undo stays dating

19:25

pool. He really wants to up hook her up. And

19:27

my PR team at the time was like, you

19:30

know, we don't really think,

19:32

you know, it's a good look. Really, we

19:34

just don't feel really feel like you need to do

19:36

it. You know, they don't really you know,

19:39

it's kind of it's not really it's not really

19:41

like a celebrity version of it, Like

19:43

basically they're like, it's usually for regular

19:45

people and not for folks on TV. So

19:49

from a PR Steff Wonder like it's

19:51

beneath you basically to do it. You shouldn't

19:53

do it, but you know what, I'm

19:56

going hear me some loser like Mike our

20:01

team and trying they were trying to look

20:03

at for my best interests. But here's

20:06

the thing, you know, I always

20:08

just kind of go with

20:10

my spirit and my heart and just kind

20:12

of do whatever I want to do. Like I have a great

20:14

team of people that you know, give

20:16

me great advice, but at the end of the day,

20:18

I'm going to do what I want to do. And it just kind of

20:20

came up at a time where I was like, you know what, as

20:23

long as I have to get stuck with nobody that I don't

20:25

like, as long as I if I don't have to pick anybody, if

20:28

I don't like any of these dudes, let's

20:30

go, let's have fun. And it was a free trip

20:32

to l A and I love being out in l A. So

20:34

I was like, let's let's go. Let's make it happen. So

20:38

she made it happen once again. She picked

20:40

me, and I didn't think anything of it. I

20:43

like, like I said, I thought i'd see her around,

20:45

you know, maybe a couple of years later and invent

20:47

celebrity event of whatever and say hey, let

20:49

me stop Mike. Okay, first of all, Mike was the cutest

20:52

one. He was

20:57

was lined up. Okay, hold on, why why

21:00

did you hear the shade? She said, like

21:03

it was Mike and a bunch of I'm

21:06

like, I'm not an Elba's clan. It's

21:09

like it wasn't like you

21:14

know what I'm saying is Mike was definitely the

21:16

standout. Okay. When I was

21:18

walking out to the stage, Mike and

21:20

these two other really nice guys were already

21:22

out there. Okay, they had three other

21:24

dudes. They were like backup dudes

21:27

because I could switch a guy out if I didn't like what I

21:29

saw when I made it out there. And when

21:31

I walked past the backup guys, I was

21:34

like, I hope to hell

21:36

does some better looking men

21:38

on this page. The backup

21:41

plans are not gonna be backing anything up over

21:43

here. So um,

21:46

anyway, long story short, and I know we're

21:48

not making it short. That's

21:50

okay out in every

21:52

way, he just came off just super confident.

21:56

Um fun uh. He came

21:58

off way more spirit and religious

22:01

than he actually is the

22:04

man at he has not taken me to church

22:06

once we have, we

22:09

haven't been able to church. This

22:12

is I've known you almost four years now. If

22:17

I stepped inside a church with Mike kill at this point,

22:19

it will probably fall down on us. But I

22:22

remember what stood out was every question

22:24

that I asked him, you know, had something about

22:26

God. So I was like, Okay, now I'm trying

22:29

to be as lady. I don't know if I want to be the first lady.

22:31

Is he? Is

22:33

he getting better go into I mean

22:36

there's clearly a ministry inside this me.

22:38

No, But every question that that was a

22:40

genuine answer. You know, I still have

22:42

I have a strong belief in God, strong, very

22:44

spiritual. You know, every night. This is the first

22:47

man I've ever been with that we get on

22:49

our knees every name. And so just because we're not in the house

22:51

of the Lord, doesn't mean that the Lord isn't inside us,

22:53

you know what I mean? So yeah, absolutely,

22:55

man, that's what That's

22:58

what relationship is built on. But once in so

23:00

she picked me slow burned. I

23:02

didn't think I was going to actually see her. We went on a

23:04

date because the producers actually tricked

23:07

us because it went a couple of weeks

23:09

right back, it was like a week well,

23:12

and then so I get I get an email from the

23:14

producer, and the emails from the produce

23:16

like Cynthy Bailey really likes you, she

23:19

really wants to go out with you. Is it okay

23:21

for you to have her number and give her a call? Like

23:24

oh really? And lo and behold.

23:27

It was telling her the same thing, you get

23:32

in touch with you directly, okay.

23:34

Well, when I was like all

23:37

right, sweating me so hard. Gone.

23:44

But you know what's funny because one of the

23:46

things I've really walked away when I

23:48

first initially met when I first initially

23:50

met Mike, before we even went out on a date, was

23:52

just thinking, you know, it just seems like a good

23:54

dude, Like I didn't know, like, you know,

23:56

I wasn't like, oh my god, like I can't wait to go

23:58

out with him, and this is death with someone I could see

24:00

myself spending the rest of my life with. My takeaway

24:03

was he just felt like a

24:05

good guy, Like he just

24:07

felt like he had good intentions and

24:10

he was funny, and he was cute, and

24:12

you know, he was likable,

24:15

and he just felt, you

24:17

know, like someone that even if we didn't, you

24:20

know, if it didn't happen for us, I wouldn't

24:22

mind having him as a friend, which

24:25

is one of the most important things

24:27

you can have in any kind of relationship that gets

24:29

serious, is the friendship first.

24:31

And I felt like I could be friends with the man. Yeah,

24:34

and piggyback off of that, I

24:36

felt the same way even if it wasn't somebody

24:39

I was going to spend the rest of my life with. With Cynthia,

24:41

when I first got to know

24:43

her, I felt like, I'm going to

24:45

know this woman. She's going to be a part of my life

24:47

in some capacity. I don't know what, but

24:50

I felt a connection with her and

24:52

she was just so sweet, so genuine, which she still

24:54

lives in this very day. Uh. And

24:57

I was like, maybe I could introduce her to her

24:59

next husband, or she introduced me to, you

25:01

know, my next wife. Who knows. But I knew

25:04

after a short amount of time that she was

25:06

going to be in my life for a long period of time.

25:08

And uh, you know, I'm lucky enough that she's

25:10

my wife and now she's Mrs Hill, not

25:12

Cynthia. You said it was like at first sight

25:15

rather than love at first sight. How did things change

25:18

to love? Things

25:21

changed well to love. She

25:23

might not want to get too graphic, but things

25:27

changed over time. You know what, We just took

25:29

our time. You

25:32

know what, what's important to me

25:34

when someone expresses

25:37

an interest in getting to know me is consistency.

25:43

You know what I'm saying, Like, and

25:45

I'm not saying you gotta blow me

25:47

up the whole time, but if you start off calling

25:50

me five times a week and then

25:52

you drop down to once every two

25:54

weeks, that's not gonna

25:56

work from miss bailing. Now, if you start

25:58

off calling me once every two weeks and

26:01

that's just what we're doing, then that's fine, but you can't,

26:04

like, you gotta be consistent with what, what,

26:06

whatever it is like, you got to be consistent

26:08

with it. And one of the things about Mike was

26:12

he was consistent. You know, he would

26:14

call and check in. He wasn't like overly

26:18

checking in, but he made it pretty clear

26:20

that he wanted to be

26:22

in touch. You know, he had some distractions

26:25

going on at the time when I met him, have

26:28

some things he was in the l a street. You

26:30

have some thoughts out there too. I had some

26:32

distractions going on at the time as well, so neither

26:34

one of us was like it in a rush to really,

26:37

you know, do anything. But

26:39

it just got to a point where the more I

26:41

really started talking to him more consistently,

26:44

and then when we kind of graduated from just talking

26:46

and text into face timing. Um.

26:49

I just remember specifically he he had

26:51

started writing his book and he was like reading me

26:53

some stuff from his book, and I just was I

26:56

just remember thinking, wow, like, okay, guy

26:58

and his brother been through something, you know,

27:00

Like it just kind of made me want to know more about

27:03

him. And I love um,

27:07

you know, I don't. I don't want to say I love people struggles,

27:10

but I love to see

27:13

someone want to

27:16

be better. I love people

27:18

that are trying to be happy.

27:20

And I loved when people are on a quest

27:23

for peace, and I love when people

27:25

are just trying to live

27:27

in their purpose. And I felt like

27:29

he was trying to figure it out,

27:32

and I felt like some of the things

27:34

that he was telling me about his past, it

27:37

just didn't seem like he was happy

27:39

or happy. And for me,

27:42

that is devastating

27:45

because I'm always on

27:47

a quest for peace. I have peace, and I

27:49

even want more peace Like that is I used

27:51

to say I just want to be happy. I don't say

27:53

that anymore. I say that I want peace because

27:56

I feel like I believe that if I have

27:58

peace, I have happiness happiness.

28:00

But I could have happiness and I have peace.

28:03

So I wanted to see

28:05

him when even if I wasn't included

28:08

at the end of his journey, but I

28:10

wanted to be supportive of

28:13

what he would. It felt like he was trying to do

28:15

for himself, like I felt like there was some self

28:17

love missing or something, and

28:20

I wanted to Um,

28:23

I don't know, I just roote it for him, and then I ain't

28:25

marrying a man. What do you want me to say? Yeah,

28:28

it's interesting because I've had

28:31

the honor and privilege of knowing Mike before

28:33

he met you, Cynthia. And one thing I

28:36

realized when Mike and I we would go

28:38

out. We may go to a

28:41

restaurant, bar, or whatever the situation

28:43

was, and I just remember, whatever

28:55

you need to say correctly.

29:05

That was the old man the new man here.

29:10

But no I saw I saw a

29:12

sincere change in Mike.

29:14

When y'all begin dating in I'll

29:17

never forget you said that again, Like

29:19

what kind of change when you say a sincere change?

29:21

Like what meaning? He was all

29:23

about you? And I think everyone realized

29:26

that from seeing social media, Instagram

29:28

and all of that good stuff. But I'll never forget talking

29:30

to you, Mike. We were a town. It was a Friday

29:33

night in Los Angeles hangout.

29:37

We were there all the time that

29:47

I'm sorry to take that part out. That's

29:49

gonna be a beat. John put a beat Cassi

29:53

producing, he'll beat that word. But

29:57

sincerely, though, I remember talking to

29:59

you on a Friday night, Mike. I don't remember if you

30:01

you remember this. I don't know if you remember this, but

30:04

I was like, man, bro, like are you in

30:06

love? Like you? And he

30:08

was like, Bro, it's real,

30:12

um and love. I'm like, man,

30:14

because you were going so hard. I'm

30:16

like, I never seen this before.

30:19

So it was just so interesting to see that

30:22

transition just take place and it

30:24

hit hard. It was almost

30:26

like you know when you you data

30:28

celebrity, like y'all both celebrities. You have both been

30:30

on television. That's all good and fun, but

30:33

sometimes you kind of you go in slow

30:35

just to see how a person responds

30:37

to you and you don't you know, you don't take

30:40

it up a notch too quickly. But Bro was hit nor

30:43

I couldn't believe it. So it was almost like a certainty,

30:46

like you knew, Mike, did you know that

30:48

this was gonna be your wife? Like? When did you

30:50

know? You know? I didn't know, like

30:52

I said, in the beginning of our relationship, and a lot of

30:54

people didn't know about our relationship for a while,

30:57

obviously, because when you're dating

30:59

a select really you need to keep that quiet

31:02

for a while because you know, people come for you

31:04

and and it's a different animal once

31:06

you're out in the open. Even if I've

31:08

been on television, Cynthia is the celebrity.

31:11

I'm just a dude that's on television. I've been on

31:13

television for a while. But she's a celebrity

31:15

and I understand that, and it's a different animal that's out

31:17

there. So we didn't uh tell

31:20

people publicly for a long period of time,

31:22

maybe about four months into a us

31:25

dating uh And then during

31:27

my birthday, she did something really

31:29

special and it kind of made me say,

31:31

like, oh, okay, well she's she's

31:33

a little different. She did something that nobody had

31:35

ever done from me, but nobody else. Still my birthday party,

31:37

so pretty much threw the man a birthday

31:40

party and he was in Well it wasn't

31:42

but it wasn't just a birthday party, but it was like an

31:44

intimate affair. She had

31:46

set up her wind seller before it actually

31:48

had gotten built out, you know, candle

31:51

lights, whatever, cater and

31:54

I'm like, this is this is for me. I've

31:56

always been I've always been a giver in relationships.

31:58

I've always been the one that has been

32:01

asked to give, and you

32:03

know, you know, you receive a little bit, but I

32:05

never really expected it. And if

32:07

I received something, that was always in

32:09

return or something I've given. Nobody's

32:11

ever given me something without me actually

32:13

giving them something. So when Cynthia

32:15

did that for me and always tried to look out for him,

32:18

like she's a little different and it had nothing

32:20

to do with her celebrity or her family whatnot.

32:22

I wanted to date the individual. I wanted

32:24

to date the person Cynthia Deniece Bailey,

32:27

and that's why I found out. So over a period of

32:29

time, I just started to open

32:31

up a little bit more because you'll tell you I in

32:34

the beginning, I was very guarded, guarded.

32:36

Michael's very guarded when I met him.

32:39

Uh, he was always kind of looking like

32:41

literally was trying to get in the door, but had

32:43

an exit, exit strategy the whole time.

32:46

Yeah. Um, he was

32:48

afraid to fall, afraid

32:50

to commit, afraid to be honest,

32:53

he was just afraid of everything. Yeah, And

32:55

it was obvious. And I'm

32:58

you know, he met me at a point in my

33:00

life where not only

33:02

do I know what I want, I know what I don't

33:04

want. You know what I mean. And I'm like, look, we're

33:06

doing this, we're not doing this. Like I'm

33:09

not like I

33:11

don't go for me relationships.

33:14

You know, I don't have like a fear, like I just

33:16

love my pisces. I jumped

33:18

all in with both feet. If it works

33:20

out, it works out. If it doesn't, it doesn't. It ain't

33:22

that deep, so I'm not really trying to be halfway

33:25

in and trying to be halfway out. And I was

33:27

like, dude, like, either

33:29

we're gonna do this or we're not gonna do

33:31

this, Like this is not a host situation we

33:33

want if you're scared,

33:36

if you're that concerned and you just

33:38

don't know if you if this is

33:40

making you this uncomfortable. We don't

33:42

have to be together. But but but but it

33:44

wasn't an uncomfortable with just me still

33:47

figuring it out. I was still going through my process,

33:49

and like you said, I was writing my book at the time, and

33:51

I was working through my issues. As

33:53

I told you before, Giano, my book was my first

33:55

form of therapy. We talked about this

33:57

as black men growing up in certain environ

34:00

ments or just in general. You know, it's

34:02

just not something that we have in

34:04

our community is therapy.

34:07

And my book became my therapy.

34:09

And as I was writing my book and

34:11

I was sharing some of my stories in my

34:13

past and my truths with Cynthia,

34:16

she was the first woman that really

34:18

accepted and didn't judge me for him as

34:20

a matter of fact, that brought us closer. And

34:23

as I started, as I started talking

34:25

about a little bit more, I felt like I

34:27

can trust her because I can tell

34:29

her some of my most intimate details that

34:31

I probably hadn't even told people before. And

34:34

the reaction that she gave me made me feel

34:36

like I could trust her a little bit more. So

34:39

I well, I will say

34:41

this and then we can move on to the

34:43

next question. I'm a very secure woman.

34:46

I'm extremely secure, and I think

34:48

it's very rare to find someone that

34:50

says it and it's actually true. Like I'm

34:52

not going to question

34:55

stuff. I'm not trying to check your messages.

34:58

I don't care about any that.

35:00

I don't give a damn who you following. I

35:02

don't care. But as long as you if you're with me,

35:04

as long as you're being appropriate, I don't care about

35:06

you. Like it that part,

35:15

And she's a classy one on the house

35:20

because people don't

35:22

anyway. But like there's like

35:24

I think, like, you know, I don't

35:27

know what Mike was used

35:29

to, but I feel like I know, I know l a dating.

35:31

I know that's like and I feel like

35:33

it's a lot of game playing and like, oh,

35:36

you know you gotta be like, oh, let

35:38

me try to you know, if you text me, let me

35:40

wait two or three days the texting

35:42

back, like playing all these stupid games

35:44

that I do not play. If I like you, I'm

35:47

going to act like I like you. And

35:49

if you're looking for a challenge, if you think me

35:51

calling you a couple of times a day that I'm

35:53

not being a challenge anymore, that's a turn

35:56

off. And you can miss me with all of that, Like, I'm

35:58

not playing any of those games at this point

36:00

in my life. I've never played those games. I'm certainly

36:02

not going to do it now. And I felt

36:04

like, you know, Michael's used to

36:06

at L a dating style, and it was like I

36:08

think he had been, you know, in some situations

36:11

before me that maybe didn't work out for him,

36:13

that he would have liked for them to work out, and I

36:15

think those people may have been playing games.

36:17

So it was just kind of like a weird like

36:20

like, you know, we just had to

36:22

kind of just have a come to Jesus on it

36:25

because I'm not I'm

36:27

secure. I don't care what you did.

36:29

It is what it is. If you want to be with me,

36:33

then be with me. And if you don't gonna

36:35

be with somebody else, Like it's just not that

36:37

complicated. And if you want to call me,

36:40

if I want to call you fifty five times a day, I'm

36:42

going to call you fifty six times a day. That's

36:45

how something of Bailey rolls. And if I

36:47

don't feel like talking, I'm gonna say, hey,

36:50

I love you, babe. I don't feel like talking today.

36:52

Like I just think honesty and transparency

36:55

and realness is what really

36:58

matters at the end of the day. And then somebody's checking for you.

37:00

They hear you because they like

37:03

you, but if they ain't really checking for you that hard,

37:05

they're gonna find a reason to not go with

37:07

whatever you're what,

37:10

whatever you're trying to be honest about. You

37:12

know what I'm saying, because at the end of the day, if I'm telling

37:14

you the truth and telling you how I feel and I'm being vulnerable

37:16

and putting it out there and

37:18

you use it against me in some way, that's

37:20

childish, that's stupid. That's playing games like

37:23

I don't. I don't like stuff like that, and I'm

37:25

not that girl. And again I

37:27

feel like i'm I don't. I can say I don't know who

37:29

else. I do know a lot of people who's been he's been

37:31

with, but I'm secure, I

37:33

don't know if that was always his experience. So

37:36

the rules change when you're dealing with someone that actually

37:38

is curious. So then you gotta be like, Okay, well

37:41

this is different. She's not harassing me. She

37:43

let me hang out. Mike has like more girlfriends

37:45

that he has guy friends. I don't care. Yeah,

37:48

and I know him all like

37:50

being around a lot of women, also

37:53

a flir. He's a lot of those

37:55

things. But as long as he's not disrespectful

37:58

to me or being inappropriate, if

38:00

he's with me, I don't care. Do

38:02

whatever you gotta do to feel good. Brother, whatever

38:05

you got going on, ain't got nothing to do with

38:07

me. What you need, what you need to feel

38:09

good, and got nothing to do with me. So

38:12

if um, you

38:14

know, however you move, as long as

38:16

it's not disrespecting me, if you're with me,

38:19

we're good. Mm hmm. Now

38:21

you know what's interesting social

38:24

media these days? And Cynthy,

38:26

I know you have three point three million followers on

38:28

Instagram and it's it's a popular

38:30

culture thing. And to be very

38:33

honest with you all, I feel

38:35

a little hopeless with where the culture

38:37

is when it comes to dating and social

38:39

media and the girls being half naked. And

38:41

I'm recently out of a relationship

38:44

that I thought was gonna go the distance

38:46

but it didn't, and it it kind

38:49

of made me feel a bit bad

38:51

about what dating may look

38:53

like, uh kind of moving forward and

38:55

almost, like, to be honest with you, I seemingly

38:58

don't really want to date and that's really

39:00

the feeling that I get because it

39:02

just seems like it's a lot of trash out there

39:04

and women these days,

39:06

at least from what I've seen in a number

39:08

of instances. I know that's not all women, but

39:11

it just seems like it's just a fast paced

39:13

kinda l a vibe

39:15

and you know, how much money do you have? What can

39:17

you do for me? And it's

39:20

just it seems like a very toxic culture

39:23

um these days. What advice would with you

39:25

both either you know? Please both of you responded,

39:28

is what advice would you have for those

39:30

who are interested in getting married and feel

39:32

hopeless? Because I'm almost feeling like, man, I don't

39:34

know if I'm gonna ever get married, and I'm thirty four,

39:36

and I feel like, you know, Mike, I know you've been married a

39:39

couple of a couple of times. I'm like, my man

39:41

has been married a couple of times. I can't even get one,

39:43

like what's going on all

39:46

my alimony payments. I appreciate that and

39:48

all the money I've lost over the years in a heartache,

39:50

and thank you for ripping off the band ai G.

39:52

I know I appreciate that, but go ahead, I'm sorry

39:56

you got a lot of advice to get we're being real, I

39:59

would you were here

40:01

here well, first of all, first and

40:04

foremost, I was sad to hear that your last

40:06

relationship didn't work out. You know. Michael

40:09

was kind of you know, I was kind of hearing

40:11

things from him, how it happy you were,

40:13

and it just seemed like it was it was

40:15

the one. And then when he

40:17

said that, you guys, it didn't work out, and I

40:20

don't don't even remember the reason, maybe didn't

40:22

even tell him, I can't remember, but whatever he

40:24

told me didn't work out. So, um,

40:27

I was sad to hear that because it seemed like you

40:29

were happy, um with In

40:32

regards to the question that you're asking

40:34

me, I would say to you, first

40:36

of all, don't let you

40:39

know the fact when things don't work out, sometimes

40:42

it's a good thing because that

40:45

person could be in the way of the person that you're

40:47

supposed to be with when it happens, you

40:50

know what I'm saying. So that's

40:52

just part of your journey, that's part of whatever

40:54

you whatever. Take the good of, whatever the

40:56

good was, let you know, let it

40:58

be a teachable moment, whatever, and

41:00

go into this next thing

41:03

whenever it HAPs definitely a teachable moment,

41:05

that's for sure. You

41:09

write about that one. I got notes

41:13

learn you're gonna learnt trust

41:15

me notes well,

41:18

but but don't but don't let you know. We

41:20

all have been through relationships that didn't

41:22

maybe end the way that we would have liked

41:24

for them to end. But please don't like put

41:27

bring that into the new situation when that's

41:29

become a situation, because that's not fair

41:31

to the new person, you know what I'm saying.

41:34

But I would say, in terms of social media,

41:37

you gotta figure out what you what you

41:39

what you want? You know what I mean. There's a lot of temptation

41:42

out there on social media. There's a lot of

41:44

beautiful women out there on social

41:46

media there, some of them good, some

41:49

come in peace, and some come with

41:51

bad intentions. So I would say,

41:54

you gotta figure out. You gotta figure out what

41:56

you want and what you're looking for.

41:58

You know what I'm saying. If you just want, you

42:01

know, some eye candy,

42:03

just something to look good at, somebody with a bunch

42:05

of following, somebody with a bunch of likes and all that

42:07

stuff, you gotta figure out what you really are looking

42:09

for. And I feel like once you kind

42:12

of figured that out. Like take

42:14

your time and like be selective because

42:16

you gotta remember you are a prize

42:19

as well, you know what I'm saying, So

42:22

who not only look for what you want, but who

42:24

deserves you?

42:27

You know? Who told me that on social

42:29

media you might be able to find on social media because

42:31

I'm not gonna I'm not going to rule that out.

42:34

But it's so funny

42:36

because you just said that you are a prize

42:38

as well, and someone told me that just two

42:40

weeks ago, my my sister And now

42:42

who's a part of your franchise, Anie Kate Williams.

42:44

She was saying, listen, Giano, you a

42:47

prize as well. You gotta keep that in mind.

42:49

And I think that's important for guys to know, as

42:52

the folks who are listening when you pursue

42:55

women know your value as well. Yeah,

42:57

yeah, when you know who you are and you know what

42:59

and I'm saying you don't. I think sometimes

43:01

when it comes like you can have your stuff just

43:04

like a woman kid, you could have everything together and

43:06

then when it comes to the affairs of the heart, just

43:08

end up being a fool basically, you

43:10

know what I mean? Just love? Can you know

43:13

fools? Water, fools fall in love. You know what I'm

43:15

saying. You have to

43:17

just be just as focused and strategic

43:21

and your personal life as you are in your

43:23

professional life when it comes to what

43:25

you want and what you don't want, and when you

43:27

sit when you see those signs come up when you meet

43:29

somebody, Because there are signs,

43:31

brother, now you can acknowledge

43:35

them, you know. Science. That's where

43:37

you need to fall back a little bit and be like, wait,

43:40

okay, now what is that? What

43:42

is that that feeling you get? We're like, oh, that

43:44

didn't really feel right? Non't here? Right up? Pay

43:47

attention to that, you know what I'm saying, because

43:49

it means something. If you feel something,

43:51

it means something. And and

43:55

just be honest with yourself. If you want a nice girl,

43:58

look for a nice girl. If

44:00

you want a boss, look for a boss. If

44:03

you want an Instagram thought, go live

44:05

your happy life with the Instagram thought

44:08

looking for don't want the temptations

44:10

and the distractions of Instagram thought, and then

44:13

really want to be overre with somebody classy. No,

44:15

it doesn't work like that. Do do

44:17

you figure out what you really want?

44:20

Because the two are not the same.

44:23

The two are not the same, be

44:25

honest with yourself absolutely,

44:28

And for those who may not know, a

44:30

thought is a loose woman in

44:32

kind terms

44:36

over there, but

44:39

this is you know, your audience, babies,

44:44

it's just like just still,

44:50

you know, okay,

44:54

thought? Then he has to give the definition of a thought

44:57

a lose lose lady. Eat.

45:01

Okay,

45:03

that's question. No, I'll just let you

45:05

talk. You realize

45:08

perspective. Well, I'm not gonna be able to finish my thought

45:11

anyway. So it's saying,

45:15

go ahead, Mike, go ahead, Mike, and Cynthia, I'm

45:17

enjoying your your commentary. Thank you so much. Mike.

45:19

What are your thoughts? This popular culture is so important

45:21

now and it it seems as though a lot of

45:24

people lead with Instagram these

45:26

days. They don't lead with how

45:29

can we get to know each other? Can I take you on a

45:31

date? Can I be a gentleman? And it's

45:33

like, oh, how many followers do you have on Instagram?

45:36

As though that that determines you're prominent

45:38

on how you're going to treat a person, and it's it's become a

45:40

very toxic, toxic culture.

45:42

In my opinion, you can meet on candy

45:45

on Instagram. I don't know if you're gonna meet your wife,

45:47

I don't know if you're gonna meet you your your queen necessarily

45:50

on Instagram. There are different ways

45:52

obviously that you can meet people through dating apps,

45:54

through Instagram. Social media is huge these

45:56

days, obviously, But

45:58

you know what about old school ways of

46:01

doing things? I mean, and it's not just about

46:03

the pictures. It's not about the looks. It's not about

46:05

how many lights that they have or how

46:07

many times that they can throw

46:09

out these pictures out there on their stories, on their

46:11

on their posts and and throw

46:14

face tune on to it,

46:16

and and they know their angles. But

46:18

how about getting to know somebody, being

46:21

able to talk to somebody, getting to feel

46:23

somebody. Uh As as Cynthia

46:25

was talking about, You're not gonna find somebody who's

46:27

perfect. You're never gonna find a perfect woman. You just need

46:29

to find somebody's perfect for you. And

46:32

like everybody told you, like I tell my daughters

46:34

all the time, you know you're worth You

46:36

know you are a king. If you feel

46:39

like you're a king, you need to be

46:41

with somebody who is a

46:43

queen and vice versa. And if you find

46:45

yourself a queen, you need to be worthy

46:47

of the crown that you said that you're gonna put on your

46:49

on your head yourself, so you gotta act

46:52

that way. Bottom line is, man,

46:54

look you know, um,

46:56

you just have to go out there and

46:58

and be encouraged, be discouraged.

47:00

Everything happens for a reason. What

47:03

you went through with that young lady happen for a

47:05

reason. It allows you to grow,

47:08

uh, and it's gonna prepare you for life

47:10

to come in one way or another with the next

47:12

person that you're with. But when you go into

47:15

your next relationship, make sure you go into

47:17

your next relationship as a whole person. So

47:19

you can go intore looking for somebody that is

47:22

perfect or somebody that's great and this whole

47:25

and has everything to offer, but make

47:27

sure that you are prepared first

47:30

before that happens. And I always say that

47:33

your best relationships

47:35

are between two people who are a whole. And

47:37

on my analogy is you can

47:39

take a two layer cake. You

47:41

can have that first layer, it's got to be perfectly

47:44

rounded, right. That means that cake is whole,

47:46

and the other layer has to be perfectly rounded.

47:49

That cake is whole, and then you stack them on

47:51

top. Everything that you create on top of that is

47:53

like the icing on the cake, literally pretty

47:55

much and figuratively right. But if you've got

47:57

somebody who isn't whole or they're missing

48:00

something, a slice that's not gonna look

48:02

the same. So then you find yourself supplementing,

48:05

uh, something that you're looking

48:07

for in a relationship because you're missing

48:09

something, so you're taking that from that person,

48:11

and that then that person takes that away from you.

48:14

Then you're longing for that person, and

48:16

that person might not be necessarily right for you.

48:18

So once again, y'ano, don't be discouraged

48:21

by don't say you know, social media

48:23

is out there and I can't find a woman because I'm sliding

48:25

somebody's d ms. They're sliding in my dms. You

48:28

know. I know it's Corona and COVID

48:30

and you're not able to get out and socialize. But get

48:32

out socialized and meet somebody, and then then

48:34

they might necessarily not necessarily look

48:37

like Holly Berry. They might not be

48:39

the perfect tin, But there ain't nothing wrong

48:41

with a good eight and a great personality

48:44

and a spiritual person and somebody

48:46

who loves and respects and honors

48:48

you. And then all of a sudden, that eight

48:50

that you saw before turns out

48:53

to be the tin that you need. I want to pick up from

48:55

there at the moment, but first let's go to break.

49:00

Now, let's be clear saying

49:03

like options I got low list,

49:09

you may not get a T, but

49:11

you can get a three and a half and uh.

49:15

People. But see, the thing is like everybody's

49:17

everybody's looking for that woman that is

49:19

out there, that it's that Instagram model

49:21

and everybody wants him whatever,

49:24

you know, but sometimes those women

49:26

aren't prepared for you, that they're not the right woman

49:28

for you. Just because if I agree with that, I

49:30

don't think everybody's looking for an Instagram model.

49:33

I think there's a lot of man out here that are looking

49:35

for a successful woman that

49:37

has her own stuff going on, that's looking

49:39

for a boss. You know. That's that's

49:42

that would be me. That's what you ain't got,

49:44

Like no Instagram model, Um,

49:46

just somebody that has it going on, somebody that

49:48

you have some kind of connection with. Uh.

49:51

But I would say I would say this, I

49:53

think I agree with a lot of things that Mike said.

49:56

But if you're going to go to the Gram and

49:58

a lot of times a lot of people don't have lot of other options.

50:00

But to go to the Graham, I would definitely

50:03

played by your own rules. Shorten

50:06

a betting process. You know what I'm saying.

50:08

If you meet somebody, if you somebody seems like they're

50:10

interested in you, and you guys, get some kind of

50:12

dialogue and dams, cut the damns

50:14

out quickly. Okay, I'm

50:17

not gonna be sitting up dam and no food for three

50:19

or four weeks and months. No,

50:22

you don't want to get you're in my damns.

50:24

That means you're telling me that you're interested in

50:26

some way. So what do you want and

50:28

communicate? Stop the texting to I'm

50:30

not gonna do that. You're not gonna text me. I'm

50:33

get if I gave my phone number, call

50:35

me and then let's talk. And if

50:37

you ain't talking about none, if you don't like what I'm talking

50:40

about, then you don't have to lose

50:42

You don't have to lose it because I'm just gonna block you. And that's

50:45

what I don't understand people out here on one of DM

50:47

they want to text. They don't even ask for phone numbers

50:49

these days. It's like, what's your I G that's

50:52

that's what That's what a lot of people are doing.

50:54

These days. Secret I'm

50:57

on Instagram. I have quite a few followers.

50:59

I've had men sliding my dams.

51:02

Any any famous when you and

51:05

if I feel like I want to get to

51:07

know you, I'm going to give you my

51:09

phone upp. If

51:12

I'm not checking for you and I'm

51:14

playing games and I got ten other guys in

51:16

my d MS, I'm kind of wearing my options. I'm

51:18

not going to give you my phone up. But if

51:20

I'm interested, I'll give you. I'll

51:22

give you my number and say, hey, but why are you? Why

51:25

men sliding in d ms when they have an opportunity

51:27

to meet that person face to face, A lot of times

51:29

they could be right in that person's face state,

51:32

but no, well, I mean, if they're in a different state. I

51:34

understand that we've got a lot of suitors out there because

51:36

you know all your your thoughts. You know, we

51:38

already know what thoughts me, and we don't have to explain that anymore.

51:42

We have to explained that anymore. So it

51:44

is the thing. But you know the thing is, if

51:46

I'm in the same space with you, I'm in the same

51:48

city, and I've been in the same room

51:50

with you, and I met you that night, why am I sliding

51:53

any your d MS instead of talking to you face to

51:55

face and getting to know you and getting the vibe

51:57

with you and finding maybe finding

51:59

a connect you right away and then once

52:02

I do talk to you, if I reach

52:04

out to you because I didn't meet you

52:06

in person, I meet you through d M. You send me your

52:08

number. I'm not texting you over and over

52:10

and over again. I'm calling you. We're

52:12

having a conversation. Yeah, I don't.

52:14

I don't feel like if I meet you right away,

52:17

I'm going to meet in person because I want to get to know you

52:19

a little bit better. I'm big on talking

52:21

on the phone, not texting, but having

52:23

phone conversation and then when I get a little comfortable,

52:26

I'm big on face timing with you

52:28

so I can just kind of seeing

52:30

a house. Let

52:37

me ask you all about this. Y'all familiar

52:39

with a brother by the name of Kevin Samuels.

52:41

He has a big YouTube channel, big following.

52:43

I've been trying to get him on the podcast. He talks about

52:45

relationships quite frequently and he often

52:48

mentioned high value men. He

52:51

talks about what a high value man wants,

52:53

and he wants a woman that's gonna be submissive

52:55

to him, and he talks about

52:58

if you're if you're a high value man, and then women

53:00

shouldn't pay for anything. He says he feels

53:02

insulted if a woman chooses

53:04

to try to try to pay for anything, a meal,

53:08

rent, mortgage, anything. Y'all

53:10

familiar with Kevin Timmys, y'all agree with some

53:13

of that rhetoric about sister, you

53:15

know, like I need

53:19

yeah stands for

53:22

now. I do now. I do think a

53:24

man should be prepared to

53:26

pay for those things if he asks a

53:28

woman out. But here's my rule,

53:30

and this is you know, obviously I'm married now, so

53:32

I'm not looking. I'm not out there before anymore.

53:35

But when I was dating, if

53:37

I asked you out, I'm definitely paying

53:39

for the first meal. I'm paying for the second meal. More

53:41

likely I'm taking care of all that. But if we go

53:44

out, we continue to go out by the third

53:46

or fourth meal. If you don't even fame

53:49

or fake like you're going for the bill

53:52

or say something like, oh you always

53:54

pay, Let me buy you dessert, let

53:56

me buy you a drink, let me make you

53:58

dinner. I'm wondering. I

54:00

really am wondering now, and I'm an old school

54:02

guy and not get that or whatever. But at the same time,

54:04

I want to see that the woman is

54:06

with me for more than just a

54:09

foodie call. And that is and

54:13

l A is like that a lot women they are going

54:15

on dates with guys just for food foodiecause

54:17

that's what they call them, foodie calls. It ain't a booty

54:19

call. It's a booty call. I can't even wrap

54:22

my head around that. That's just I

54:24

just yeah, that's because for his birthday,

54:27

you running head, de private chef a

54:29

whole admit for the brothers understood,

54:32

you have value woman, So I get

54:34

that. Now, let me ask you all this because I know how

54:36

much time with y'all is. We're recording

54:38

on a Friday night. This comes out on Monday,

54:40

so y'all got things to do and it's kind

54:43

of late. But what do you think are

54:45

the most important things that make a relationship

54:47

and a marriage last? What are those? Honesty?

54:51

Trust, trust, compatibility,

54:54

commitment and

54:57

and and and and willing to work

54:59

out differences and understand

55:01

that they're going to be issues in your relationship.

55:04

Yeah, and friendship. Friendship, you gotta be

55:06

friends with your you have to

55:08

like your husband, you gotta love them

55:11

and you gotta like them two different

55:13

things. You ain't gonna like them all the time, but

55:15

like most of the time, you gotta like them most of the time, and you

55:18

gotta be well. Once again, I think working through

55:21

the issues that you have and finding somebody

55:23

that is worth working through those issues.

55:26

When you do, when you do that, that's when you I think when

55:28

you're in love. I really do. Yeah, I

55:30

agree. I agree with that. Um, everyone

55:33

you know my cast is issues. I have my

55:35

issues. You're not getting Thanks for saying that.

55:37

Well, it's the truth both of us.

55:40

I said, you had yours and I happen. I don't know if he was

55:42

going to say your other part though, that's what I'm saying.

55:44

I don't know. We both everyone has issues.

55:47

We do okay whatever those issues are. Some

55:49

may have more issues than the next person. But

55:51

everyone has issues. You have to decide,

55:54

you know. I want to know, Like when I get to

55:56

know someone, I don't want to just want

55:58

to know the good things about Tell me to asta and

56:01

so so I can know if I want to sign off sign

56:03

up for that. Tell me the

56:05

bad stuff? What are your

56:10

what are the flaws? Because

56:12

I need to know if I want to hang around for the flaws,

56:16

around for the good stuff. Tell me the

56:18

bad stuff. What's your worst thing

56:21

about you? What's your weakness? What

56:23

what you know? What

56:26

are your deal breakers? What are your

56:28

dealings? You know? For me, my deal breakers are

56:30

I'm definitely not going to be with someone

56:33

who is who

56:38

I can't trust. I just can't. I

56:40

don't have time. I can't do it. I

56:42

cannot do it. I cannot do it. So

56:45

I gotta feel comfortable. You can't

56:47

make me feel comfortable. We can't be together. I

56:50

gotta feel um

56:52

peace. You don't bring me peace. We

56:54

can't rob It's not gonna happen. So,

56:58

yeah, issues like what are

57:01

you willing to ride

57:03

with somebody on

57:06

or with through through?

57:09

What are you willing to do because some stuff

57:12

you may not want to be like you know what, I

57:14

just ain't gonna be able to do the like that's one

57:16

of your things. Like it. Mike said, this is an extreme

57:19

example, and Mike said, Um,

57:25

I like doing cocaine.

57:28

Wait a minute, is

57:30

this a confession because

57:34

I've never seen it? But tell us, Mike,

57:36

do you like cocaine. I'm just gonna

57:38

call you cocaine.

57:41

This is I've

57:44

never used cocaine in my life, right,

57:47

so even if he I know

57:49

this is a hypothetical, but to say he did

57:51

have you know, because people do you know, people

57:53

are on drugs and stuff, all right,

57:57

I would say, do

57:59

I want to do it with that? You wouldn't help me

58:01

get cleaned up? Baby? I mean I could. I

58:03

could say, Hey, you know

58:05

what, I'm gonna see you through this, help you

58:07

get off cocaine, and I'm gonna be there

58:09

with you. I'm gonna go to cocaine anonymous

58:11

with you and all that stuff. You know

58:13

what I'm saying. But I

58:16

have to ask myself do

58:18

I want to do I want to go through? You

58:21

know what I'm saying. I dated somebody that is an

58:23

alcoholic, and at

58:26

one point he wanted

58:29

to date again, and he

58:33

cannot drink because

58:35

he's an alcoholic. I

58:38

like to drink, and

58:40

I didn't feel like I

58:43

don't want to not drink around him because he's an

58:45

alcoholic. That's this problem. You know what I'm saying,

58:48

I want to go to the restaurant and order margarita.

58:50

But now I got to be feeling some kind of way. But because

58:54

you know, it may break him down, I don't

58:56

want that. I can't be in a relationship with somebody

58:58

that is an alcoholic when I'd like to

59:00

drink, So that alone wasn't

59:03

different break. I was like, look, dude, I wish you well and I hope

59:05

you meet somebody, but I'm might have my cocktails.

59:07

I'm a reality starter. I need I

59:12

can't do it. That's

59:14

an issue I didn't want to take on. So

59:16

that conversation couldn't go further than that.

59:20

So cocaine okay, but alcohol

59:22

no good, no, no no, I

59:25

just used alcohol was like real situation

59:27

that happened to me. The cocaine, you know,

59:29

the drugs and black I said, some people are willing to

59:32

put you know do uh.

59:34

You gotta be true to yourself. I don't want to deal

59:36

with that. Well for me, I want to know the rules.

59:39

Give me the rules. Let me know what we're doing in

59:41

the beginning, because if you can do it, I can

59:43

do it, bottom line, and I want

59:45

to see if you say you want to do

59:47

it, if I want to deal with it, and vice

59:49

versa. So it's not gonna be a

59:52

double standard. It's not gonna be one rule

59:54

for one person and not the other. I

59:56

want to play by the same set of rules that you're

59:58

playing by. Equality is big for me across

1:00:01

the board in any way.

1:00:03

So if you're able to do this

1:00:05

on social media, get away with it. I'm

1:00:08

able to do this on social media and get

1:00:10

away with it, bottom line, across

1:00:12

the board. So I don't like that double standards

1:00:14

are no no from me. And well, let

1:00:16

me just point out that Mike is definitely the petty one

1:00:19

in the relationship, so trust

1:00:21

and belief he can get petty

1:00:23

petty petty. Okay, if

1:00:25

if I do something and it rings in the

1:00:28

wrong way, oh brother, mad over

1:00:30

here, gonna gonna pay me back. Now, Well where

1:00:32

the other I'm gonna know that I hadn't

1:00:34

hurt this man feelings in some way. He's

1:00:36

going to go there for sure. So

1:00:39

what is it like being in a relationship where both

1:00:41

of you are in the public eye. M

1:00:44

h blessing and a curse? You

1:00:46

know, it's it's it's it's

1:00:49

difficult. You know a lot of great

1:00:51

things have come out of it. But at

1:00:54

the same time, you

1:00:56

know, when you sign on, like for me,

1:00:58

I'll just speak for myself. I signed on

1:01:01

to be a reality

1:01:03

star, so I gave up my privacy. Today,

1:01:05

I decided to be a cast member

1:01:07

of the Real Houseways of Atlanta.

1:01:10

Um. With that said, you know, my

1:01:12

life is out there. I put my life

1:01:14

out there. I am not surprised to

1:01:16

shock when people have opinions about my life,

1:01:19

good or bad. It just is what

1:01:21

it is. Um.

1:01:25

You know, for the most part, I

1:01:27

try to conduct myself in a way, carrying

1:01:30

myself in a way where I don't get a

1:01:32

lot of hate and scrutiny.

1:01:35

But at the same time, I'm

1:01:37

always expecting it because you

1:01:40

know, hat's gonna hate. You know, it just is what

1:01:42

it is. So the privacy.

1:01:45

But you know, I've been I've been in the game for a long

1:01:47

time now, I'm kind of you know, I have

1:01:49

a tough skin. I pretty much I

1:01:53

don't enjoy it. But I can deal with this point and

1:01:55

I'm not gonna lose sleep over. Um.

1:01:58

You know, people saying nasty things about me

1:02:00

or just not liking me or whatever it is.

1:02:02

You know, they, you know, the trolls may say,

1:02:05

or the blogs and may say, Like I just can't

1:02:07

really consume myself with that because

1:02:10

at the end of the day, I don't know these people. Um,

1:02:13

you know, if Michelle Obama

1:02:15

and Oprah was somewhere wearing me out, then maybe

1:02:18

my feelings will be hurt. But you know, usually

1:02:22

you know, I don't really you know, if

1:02:24

someone I respected, you know, if

1:02:26

I disappointed in some way, then

1:02:29

that would be hard for me. But as far

1:02:31

as just trolls on social media, bloggers

1:02:33

that I don't know, you know, their opinion

1:02:37

does not matter to me, and

1:02:39

they're entitled to have it. But I don't

1:02:41

I get I get to still not care, but

1:02:43

they're entitled to happen. I think of us something form

1:02:45

of relationship aspect. It's tough,

1:02:47

and I'm just gonna speak for me because you

1:02:50

know, I've been on

1:02:52

national news for the last sixteen seventeen

1:02:54

years. ESPN had a following

1:02:56

there, but this is a different animal for me, and

1:02:59

it took me a long time. Is actually adjust

1:03:02

to the scrutiny, the criticism

1:03:04

that comes with it, because your every

1:03:07

move is scrutinized. I could be

1:03:09

having lunch with a female

1:03:12

companion that's a friend that I could just have

1:03:14

face time with with Cynthia,

1:03:17

and somebody can take my picture and try and put it

1:03:19

in the blog and make it seem like it's worse than

1:03:21

what it is. And once it happens,

1:03:23

then automatically people just want to believe

1:03:25

it. I can take a picture and put it on

1:03:27

social media and they're gonna find something

1:03:29

wrong with They always have an issue and

1:03:32

they always want to say something about our relationship.

1:03:34

In the beginning, it was fake. It's for storyline.

1:03:37

Uh. It's like, oh, he's a cheater, he's

1:03:39

doing all this, he's gonna do number, cheat on

1:03:41

or whatnot. Uh oh, and they're the h

1:03:43

they're engaged. I was for the storyline, and then

1:03:45

all of a sudden, you get married or it's the only gonna last

1:03:48

for three months, I'll give it a year. You

1:03:50

see all that type of stuff, and you understand where it's

1:03:52

coming from. And like Cynthia said, you

1:03:54

know, a hater has never done anything that's

1:03:56

better than you, So you gotta understand where it's

1:03:58

coming from and and the type of person

1:04:00

that's coming from. But it's still tough

1:04:03

to get used to because it is

1:04:05

our relationship. It is our love and

1:04:07

we know how genuine it is and

1:04:09

we don't want anybody questioning. But the people

1:04:12

who are questioning it, we have to just pray

1:04:14

for them, and uh, you know,

1:04:16

I hope that they can find something as good

1:04:18

as we have them. Well,

1:04:22

but you know, at the same time, you you pray for him, and

1:04:24

you pray that they find somebody as

1:04:27

as wonderful, uh and

1:04:29

and as loving and have a relationship

1:04:31

as beautiful as we have, so

1:04:33

they don't really care what they do. Well, then

1:04:36

that's your that's your soul, My soul. My

1:04:38

spirit basically says, you know, I block them to but I'm

1:04:40

still gonna pray for him as I block them. Bottom

1:04:42

line. Yeah, you

1:04:44

gotta you know, see, I still got the spirit

1:04:46

in my baby, see the bottom But you know, but

1:04:48

no, bottom line is, man, It's it's

1:04:50

tough. It really is tough sometimes

1:04:53

being in this celebrity relationship

1:04:56

and having you know, people

1:04:59

having their opinions and seeing

1:05:01

anything that they want to about you at any

1:05:03

particular time. You know, sometimes I

1:05:05

just wish I could be uh dating

1:05:08

just a regular person or just a regular person

1:05:10

and not have to worry about, you know, how

1:05:12

I'm dressed, or if I put something on

1:05:14

social media, how you know, if it's gonna

1:05:16

be scrutinized. But I just want to just have fun

1:05:18

and be myself sometimes. Yeah, I can understand

1:05:21

why some celebrities, you know, when

1:05:23

they get to a certain level. And

1:05:25

I use the word celebrity loosely when it comes

1:05:27

to me, I just consider myself a reality

1:05:29

star. Um.

1:05:32

But anyway, UM, I can

1:05:34

see how some of the bigger celebrities, and I think

1:05:36

celebrity, I think, like Eddie Murphy is somebody, you know what I'm

1:05:38

saying. I could see why they kind

1:05:40

of become introverts and kind of isolate

1:05:42

themselves. I can understand that

1:05:45

the more fame I get, the

1:05:47

more um

1:05:50

piece I crave. Um. The more

1:05:52

I don't like being in the spotlight, the more

1:05:54

I don't like to be that social media around a

1:05:56

lot of different people because

1:05:59

you know, you don't know what people want

1:06:01

from you. And also, I'm very

1:06:03

protective of my energy, and I

1:06:05

don't like certain energy around me, So I'm

1:06:07

very protective of that. Um

1:06:11

Yeah, I mean it's

1:06:14

stuff. It's tough, but it's it's

1:06:17

part. It's you know. I

1:06:20

mean, I think about my little bit of little

1:06:22

little bit of celebrity I have, and I

1:06:24

think about somebody life beyond it. I'm like, with ch'awd,

1:06:27

what is she doing?

1:06:30

I can't imagine her? Hater is goodness gracious,

1:06:32

but you know what, I look

1:06:34

at what I see and in her

1:06:37

life and her relationship, it seems like,

1:06:40

you know, they protect each other. They protect

1:06:43

each other. You know, they do what they

1:06:45

need to do too. They

1:06:47

have figured out a way to have peace that

1:06:50

celebrity, and I think that's the trick. There's

1:06:53

a reason. You know, I live on

1:06:55

a lake. I need peace. I

1:06:57

need that balance in my life. I need to be

1:06:59

able to come home to peace. I

1:07:02

think that's very, very important.

1:07:04

So when the noise is going on, in the

1:07:07

chaos and the trolling and whatever,

1:07:10

it doesn't take me out because

1:07:13

I have peace. No matter what you

1:07:15

don't like me, I still get to come on the peace.

1:07:18

I had a bad episode, I still get to come on

1:07:20

to peace. Um.

1:07:23

You know, the the things that I care

1:07:25

about, I'm

1:07:27

clear about the things I care about my family.

1:07:31

You know. That's it. That's what

1:07:33

I happened at the end of the day, you

1:07:35

know, And that's it. In

1:07:37

your in your relationships, isn't your

1:07:39

Your relationship isn't scripted for the show.

1:07:42

It's it's real life. And people may

1:07:44

assume that it's scripted, but it's real life. Oh

1:07:46

trust me. So I wish it was scripted, it would be

1:07:48

easier. I wish

1:07:50

we could just come up and make it up. This is

1:07:52

our real life, and um,

1:07:56

I wouldn't have it any other ways. To be

1:07:58

honest, I've been on reality

1:08:00

TV for over a decade now, and all

1:08:02

I've ever done was be me and be

1:08:04

transparent. Show my ups, downs,

1:08:07

peaks, valleys, highs, lows, strong

1:08:10

points, weak points, be vulnerable,

1:08:12

be a mess, be a boss, be strong.

1:08:14

I've shown it all and with

1:08:17

that, I'm

1:08:20

inspiring somebody. I'm motivating

1:08:22

somebody to do something. And I always

1:08:25

just choose to focus on the positive.

1:08:27

You know, my real life is my real

1:08:29

life, and I show if I'm gonna

1:08:31

be a reality show, a reality start, I have to

1:08:33

show my real life. Social

1:08:35

Media is a choice. I have to participated

1:08:38

that phone too, know

1:08:40

what I mean. My job, my

1:08:42

life, the job that I've chose to have,

1:08:45

you know, that's all a choice.

1:08:47

Everything else, you know, you

1:08:51

know, well, those

1:08:53

are the things that I want to do. Um

1:08:55

participating on social media, that's that's

1:08:57

my choice, you know. Engaging

1:09:00

you know, that's

1:09:02

my choice. Well, as we

1:09:04

as we bring this to a close,

1:09:07

I wanted to ask you, Mike a question

1:09:10

because when you're on TV. You're such a positive

1:09:12

and upbeat person in life,

1:09:15

and for my experience with your very positive

1:09:17

and upbeat but as we know from your

1:09:19

amazing memoir Open Mic, which came

1:09:21

out last year, you've battled your share of enter

1:09:23

demons. Why did

1:09:25

you write the book and if you would tell us some of

1:09:27

your personal struggles from from childhood.

1:09:31

Well, I wrote the book because I needed to write the book.

1:09:33

It was time. I

1:09:35

I started writing it

1:09:38

because a friend of mine told me I needed to

1:09:40

write a memoir because I was telling her about

1:09:43

my about my past

1:09:45

and some of the things that dealt with over

1:09:47

my career and my personal life. But

1:09:49

I didn't feel like it was time to write because I didn't

1:09:52

think anybody was going to read it. I'm like, who am I'm not a

1:09:54

celebrity, I'm not anybody big, nobody cares

1:09:56

about my life. But then I picked

1:09:58

it back up and started writing again about three or

1:10:00

four years later, because I felt like I needed to write

1:10:02

it because if I didn't write it at that particular

1:10:05

time, which was about three or four years

1:10:07

ago, I wouldn't be here right now.

1:10:09

And I really truly believe that Giano,

1:10:11

I really feel like I

1:10:13

would have had a stroke, I would have died of a heart

1:10:15

attack because I had so much internal

1:10:18

pain and trauma and sadness

1:10:20

that was embedded in me that I had just suppressed

1:10:23

for so many years that needed to be released.

1:10:26

And as I told you earlier in the podcast,

1:10:29

open Mic was my therapy that I didn't

1:10:32

even realize I needed to have. So

1:10:34

once I started writing a book, uh,

1:10:37

everything started flowing out

1:10:39

and I started feeling a sense of relief,

1:10:42

and I had to even write more and

1:10:44

more. And once I started writing, I

1:10:46

couldn't stop writing. And uh

1:10:49

So some of those pains, some of those traumas,

1:10:51

you know, we deal with as uh we talked

1:10:53

about it, as as being growing up in certain

1:10:55

environments as a black man, you know, seeing

1:10:59

domestic violence. You know, at an early

1:11:01

age. One of the first memories I had in my life

1:11:03

was seeing my mom, you know, brutally beaten

1:11:06

by my dad. Uh finding

1:11:08

out my dad, my stepfather who who

1:11:11

raised me, because my biological father wasn't

1:11:13

in my life. My stepfather was a

1:11:15

hit man who spent the last nine years

1:11:17

of his life in prison for murder for higher

1:11:20

you know, a lot of the things that I saw and didn't see

1:11:22

a lot of love and didn't see a lot of positive

1:11:24

male role models in my life growing up.

1:11:26

So I didn't know how to love. I didn't know

1:11:28

how to commit to anybody. The first person I ever

1:11:30

told I love this woman looked

1:11:33

at me like I was crazy, and it affected me

1:11:35

for so many years. So it was so many different

1:11:37

things that happened to me at

1:11:39

an early age that we

1:11:42

as black men a lot of times just deal with

1:11:44

because we feel like that's life and we're never

1:11:46

gonna get the the help that

1:11:48

we need. And so the reason

1:11:51

you asked me why I wrote the book, it

1:11:53

is because at the time, I needed to write that book, uh,

1:11:56

and that became my first sense of therapy, and

1:11:58

once I got that out, I was able to

1:12:01

follow up with a counselor and

1:12:03

I've been doing that ever since. Bro and

1:12:06

Gianno just really quickly. If Mike had

1:12:08

written that book, I don't think we would

1:12:10

be together. M Honestly,

1:12:14

I really don't. I don't think

1:12:17

he would um.

1:12:21

I don't think he would have been able to

1:12:24

be with someone like me, and I don't think

1:12:27

I would have wanted to be with him.

1:12:29

You know, I wouldn't have been ready. I wasn't

1:12:31

because you know, there was a lot of things,

1:12:33

and it cost me a lot of relationships. And I wrote that in open

1:12:35

mic. It cost me because I wasn't

1:12:38

whole, because I didn't realize

1:12:40

that I was hurting myself one way,

1:12:43

but I was hurting the people around me because of the

1:12:45

things that was affected me in my life that

1:12:47

I didn't even really know about. And

1:12:50

I was reaching out, like I was telling, you know, since you

1:12:52

I didn't trust a lot of people in the beginning because

1:12:54

I didn't trust myself because I wasn't in love

1:12:56

with myself. I couldn't fall in love with somebody

1:12:58

else, and that you to my ex wise, you

1:13:01

know, I could love somebody, but I could not fall

1:13:03

in love with somebody, and that was a big

1:13:06

difference. And I was hurting myself

1:13:08

and I was hurting other people around me. So yeah,

1:13:10

until I was able to become whole, I wasn't able

1:13:12

to accept somebody, uh like

1:13:15

Cynthia, because you know, I

1:13:17

was playing games. I was being

1:13:19

a boy and acting

1:13:21

like a man and thinking I was a man, you

1:13:24

know. So once I wrote the book, I was able

1:13:26

to start stepping into my manhood.

1:13:28

And I'm still doing that to this very day.

1:13:31

Wow. Yeah. And I have a copy of your

1:13:33

book. It's a great memoir and I encourage

1:13:35

people to buy it. And I also want to thank

1:13:37

you for supporting my book. Taking for granted

1:13:39

you and Cynthia went out and bought

1:13:41

it on your own. I didn't have to give a free copy and

1:13:44

you didn't have to do that for me because I supporting each

1:13:46

other. So I appreciate that. And I

1:13:48

want to thank you all for spending you'all Friday night

1:13:50

with me. It's currently a

1:13:52

p m on the Friday, and I know y'all probably

1:13:54

got the drink stirring in the background

1:13:56

and ready for that for the for the Bailey

1:13:59

Bailey drink. What's what's the name of your drink, Cynthia

1:14:02

Um Peach Bellini, Sigrums

1:14:04

Escapes, Peach Bellini, Peach Bellini,

1:14:06

So I know those that's that's getting ready for

1:14:09

your Friday night. Now before we go,

1:14:11

what's next for you guys? Do you have any big projects

1:14:14

coming up for the folks at home that they

1:14:16

should know about? What can people find you on social media?

1:14:18

And that's where elsewhere? And what's next

1:14:20

for the Real Housewives of Atlanta and and certainly.

1:14:22

UM, plug your your morning show,

1:14:25

Mike on Black News Channel. Okay,

1:14:28

what's next in terms of Real Housewives

1:14:30

of Atlanta. Um, we just finished

1:14:32

film of the reunion, three part reunion

1:14:34

that's coming up. That's always fun

1:14:37

to watch. Not as much fun to do, but definitely

1:14:40

fun for y'all to watch. It's

1:14:42

a long day, a lot going on, but I actually

1:14:44

enjoyed the region because it's our time to

1:14:46

have the face to face and just get closure

1:14:49

with whatever issues. Um, Mike and I

1:14:52

have a couple of other TV projects

1:14:54

that we're working on together. We can't really say

1:14:57

right now, but as soon as we are able

1:15:00

to officially announce them, we

1:15:02

will come back on your show and we'll let you thank

1:15:05

you. But yeah, we got a lot of things going on. You

1:15:07

guys know, if you're in Atlanta, Uh,

1:15:10

come have a glass of wine. But that's at

1:15:12

the Bailey Wine Seller. Um.

1:15:15

Absolutely, But we're good

1:15:17

right now. You know, we're like six months into our marriage.

1:15:20

Our biggest project right now,

1:15:23

our biggest job right now is now

1:15:25

that we have tied the knot. You know, getting

1:15:28

married is one thing. Stand married, you know,

1:15:30

just working on our relationship, just keeping

1:15:32

it going, you know, getting

1:15:34

here is one part like just stand, like

1:15:36

just being keep standing in this place of love

1:15:39

and happiness and peace. You know that takes work.

1:15:41

You just don't get married and then it just magically

1:15:43

everything is perfect. You gotta work on it. You gotta

1:15:46

keep you know, you gotta keep your marriage

1:15:48

going and keep it happy and healthy. Which

1:15:50

is why my man is about taking me to dinner on a

1:15:52

date. Yeah.

1:15:55

But now I got you know, I got the Black News Channel. Man,

1:15:57

it's just started and we just launched in marsh

1:16:00

re launched. You'll start your day with

1:16:03

sharing the mike, so getting up super

1:16:05

early in the morning, having a good time. It's part of talk

1:16:07

show, a part news shannel. We keep it real great

1:16:09

platform. But also

1:16:12

you know, at Cynthia said, we got a couple of projects

1:16:14

that we're working out that's coming out pretty soon. Open

1:16:17

Mic still in bookstores, Bonds

1:16:19

and Nobles, Target, Walmart,

1:16:23

and um one more place

1:16:25

Amazon, Amazon, there you go, Amazon

1:16:27

dot Com. Semo. Man is always looking out for

1:16:29

me there and uh, I got my open

1:16:32

mic sessions that I'm doing and just you

1:16:34

know, enjoying life, man, that's what it's all

1:16:36

about. And hanging out my man. Gia L.

1:16:40

A but he's hanging in Miami so much. Now

1:16:42

you come see me anymore? Brother,

1:16:44

Yeah, now I'm gonna be with you. And I

1:16:47

saw that I rather I didn't see a

1:16:49

lot of people told me that I made the Real Housewives

1:16:51

of Atlanta when I was at your wedding. So yeah,

1:16:53

you was dancing, bro, Yeah,

1:16:56

that's one of my biggest skill sets. I hit

1:16:58

the dance floor. You have a the time,

1:17:00

man, you absolutely you already know

1:17:03

indeed, Well, thank you all for joining out

1:17:05

lout with Gianno calledwell and it's

1:17:07

been an honor to hear your story again

1:17:10

and expose my audience to uh

1:17:14

your lives and it's it's really an honor

1:17:16

to see where you all are and where you're

1:17:18

going. And I'm so thankful to be a

1:17:20

friend to you both and and just see

1:17:22

it up close and personal. And thank you

1:17:24

for sharing that light with with with my listeners.

1:17:27

Giano, Thank you man for having us on May We

1:17:29

really appreciate your brother absolutely,

1:17:31

Thank you, my guy. I want to thank Mike Hill

1:17:33

and Cynthia Baby Hill again for

1:17:35

the great interview. If you're enjoying the show,

1:17:37

please leave us a review and rate us with five stars

1:17:39

on Apple podcasts. If you have any questions

1:17:42

for me, please email me at out Loud at

1:17:44

get your Street sixty dot com and I'll try to answer

1:17:46

them in our future episode. You can

1:17:48

also find me on Twitter, Instagram, Facebook,

1:17:50

and parlor at Gianno Caldwell. And if

1:17:52

you're interested in learning more about my story, please

1:17:54

pick up a copy of my best selling book title Taken

1:17:57

for Granted, How Conservatism Can Win Back

1:17:59

the Americans at Liberalism Failed. Special

1:18:01

thanks for our producer John Cassio, researcher

1:18:04

Aaron Klingman, and executive producers

1:18:06

Debbie Meyers and speaker New Gingridge, all

1:18:08

part of the Ginglidge three sixty network