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1:41

the vine. Hey

1:47

everybody, welcome to Off the Vine. I'm

1:49

your host Caitlin Bristow. How do you

1:51

say your last name Maria? George S.

1:53

Oh, it's just that simple. Yeah.

1:56

Okay. Well, we have Maria, the iconic

1:58

Canadian queen from the season of the bachelor.

2:00

We talked about everything. Yeah, we did. I don't

2:02

even know how to tease it. We talk about,

2:05

we settle up some rumors. People that think they

2:07

can talk shit about you and they can't because

2:10

you have a voice. We talk

2:12

about your recent podcast that you did on Call

2:14

Her Daddy and clear up. And boy bands. And

2:16

a lot of boy bands. We cleared up some

2:18

rumors. And we talk about just like what's next

2:20

for you. And I loved today. That was so

2:23

fun. Did you have fun? So much fun. Okay.

2:25

You're, you're the shit, Caitlin. And you're doing great

2:27

things. And you are the shit

2:29

and we are the shit and I love you. I'm hyped

2:32

for this one. One because I

2:34

see myself in you quite a bit. And

2:37

not just because you're Canadian. Just I feel

2:39

like you're unapologetic. I feel like you want

2:42

to like live this authentic life. But with

2:44

that always comes some backlash because people don't

2:46

understand when people are just free to be

2:48

whoever they are and say what they're feeling

2:51

and say what they want to say, be

2:53

who they are. I feel like it's very

2:55

intimidating to people. Yeah. And it can create

2:57

some, some backlash or some

3:00

controversy or online chatter, if you will.

3:02

But we'll get into all that. I

3:04

wanted to start off by just backtracking

3:06

a little bit because obviously we all

3:08

know you from the season

3:10

of The Bachelor. What were you doing before you were

3:12

in? So I worked for

3:14

my family's company. Okay. Okay. Yeah. We all

3:16

know like a sprinkle company. I always say

3:18

that and they're like, what company? Sprinkle. Sprinkle?

3:21

Like, like, you know, like the little

3:23

like toppings and stuff like crinkles. Yeah.

3:25

Yeah. No, because it's so funny. Everyone

3:28

always says like sprinklers and like, no,

3:30

sprinkles, you know, cute. Yeah. What

3:32

a cute job. I know the family business.

3:34

You know, we've been in candy for a long

3:36

time and yeah. Wait,

3:39

what's the business? Plug it out. Oh no. I

3:41

mean, I've been, everyone knows now, but like, oh,

3:44

everyone, but Caitlin, no, honestly, yeah, no, it's just

3:47

like a sprinkle company. You know, my dad owned

3:49

a chocolate factory prior to this with his dad

3:51

and like, it's just, he's always stayed in the

3:53

candy business. And now it's kind of like what

3:56

he did with his dad. He's doing with us.

3:58

And I was just like, it's just. You

4:00

know cute it out. Yeah, wrinkle company.

4:02

I know right You said before

4:04

you started that you were a little nervous so nervous.

4:07

What makes you nervous? Is it? Well, you tell me

4:09

I was gonna answer for you, but no no no

4:11

I mean if you ever want to answer to me

4:13

do it, please But no, I just think that like,

4:15

you know, sometimes like when I'm comfortable and already I

4:17

just know I'm comfortable with you And like you said

4:19

like I when

4:21

I watched like the Bachelor

4:23

and I've always been a huge fan I

4:25

love the franchise like you were always someone

4:27

I looked up to and not only cuz

4:30

you're Canadian But because the way that you

4:32

are also unapologetically yourself and if

4:34

I was ever gonna go on I was like

4:36

I want to be a Caitlin Oh, no, no,

4:38

like literally, you know, you do it the way

4:41

you want to do it and that got you

4:43

far And you know, I just remembered whatever so

4:45

just being nervous because I'm so comfortable with you

4:47

already We're like, what am I gonna say today?

4:51

What am I a beauty of you? Why do you

4:53

think I'm lubing you up with a barrels? Why

4:55

honey? I do you like the Rosé beautiful Isn't

4:57

that nice? I love it. Well, that's what I

4:59

was gonna tell you so much. Um, so we

5:02

both have a mutual friend So Peter Gurgis Oh

5:04

Peter, bro I met you

5:06

so he did a whole like thing for your wine of

5:08

party. I was there got okay You

5:11

were at my wine event. Yes, I was and I was

5:13

in like, you know How he did like a little private

5:15

like section for you Yeah, I was sitting there and he

5:17

brought you to the table and I was like, hi, how

5:19

are you? We took a shot together. I like oh, I

5:22

feel like you won't remember but it's okay. I actually

5:24

do Okay, that was me and I was like and

5:26

it was right before I went on the show It

5:29

was did you tell me you were going on the tour? You know, I didn't

5:31

know yet I didn't really have a

5:33

shot of tequila didn't have a shot tequila.

5:35

Mm-hmm. Wait, how funny I know I know

5:37

Peter Gurgis. I've loved him so much. I was 19 and I'm 38

5:41

Yeah, so that is a long ass relationship the best

5:43

like he's just such a good person and like yeah

5:45

I told him about wanting to go on the bachelor

5:47

and he brought you up, you know And and that's

5:49

why when I remember always telling him and then he

5:51

brought you to the table and I was like, hi

5:53

How are you? Oh my god, just funny. You weren't

5:55

working there. You were just no feeding Funny.

5:58

I do remember that there's like three other girls with

6:00

you. There was? Yeah. Oh my god! It's

6:02

like you're here again just drinking now you've been on. That

6:05

and to your success honestly like you're doing

6:07

amazing and but yeah I want you to

6:09

know that like you stood out to I'm

6:11

sure a lot of women but me including

6:13

and I you always were in the back

6:15

of my head going on this season because

6:18

I was like if I'm gonna do this

6:20

I'm gonna do it in my way but

6:22

also I like the women that have done

6:24

it in the past who have been themselves

6:26

and like weren't afraid to like just push

6:28

the limits yeah push the limits like just

6:30

have fun and that's who you were and

6:32

I was like I

6:35

mean I'm gonna do the same well and you

6:37

want people to watch like you want your friends

6:39

and family to watch and go that is so

6:41

her yes but that's not I sat them down

6:43

I was like I will not go on this

6:45

show without allowing you guys to see the

6:48

Maria you know yeah I can't I couldn't

6:50

do it yeah see anyone else yeah yeah

6:53

but it's that the the jig is up

6:55

real quick you start to see through those

6:57

people were there people on the show I

7:00

can't believe I'm saying this but I didn't really

7:02

watch this season and I which is crazy it's

7:04

like blown up yeah it's like

7:07

okay the show is back like I still

7:09

want to go back and watch because of

7:11

just how good this is it was because

7:13

you need to rejoin too and like you

7:15

know he's great and like can I say

7:17

that like there is a lot of stupid

7:19

drama this season sure but stupid drama is

7:21

what everyone loves if people think that the

7:23

drama is going to stop on any season

7:26

they are ridiculous and delusional let's get

7:28

let's use that one in the loop

7:30

I know it's giving delusional yeah because

7:32

that's what people tune in for they

7:34

tune in for love yeah of course

7:36

yeah they tune in for all the

7:38

different personalities and this show is so

7:40

well done yeah that I always say

7:42

there's a reason it's been on for

7:44

30 plus years like this is one

7:46

of the longest running reality TV shows

7:48

and it's because the format works and

7:50

part of that format is drama and

7:52

we are here for it do you

7:54

think that it was portrayed truthfully

7:56

the drama that was going on yeah

7:59

I think And I've said this

8:01

before that it has been such an honest

8:03

edit because I've you know I've heard girls

8:05

and I and like especially even after the

8:07

show, you know, some girls were saying, you

8:09

know Oh, they didn't show

8:11

enough and they're insinuating There was more that

8:13

the audience wasn't seeing and it might I'm

8:16

like, oh no, no This was a perfect

8:18

edit you guys just thought it would

8:20

look better on your end and that's the thing

8:22

Everyone always wants to run to it's a bad

8:24

edit or this or it's that like what I

8:26

and I'm a straight shooter So I would say

8:28

it but no I have to say like it

8:30

was an honest edit, you know We were all

8:32

involved. We were all there and I'm

8:34

just happy that because where I was kind of

8:36

like where was tricky for me I didn't know

8:38

how other people would perceive me I knew how

8:41

I felt in the house and like how I

8:43

felt with the other women and like why I

8:45

felt so like I feel Like I'm being wrongly

8:47

perceived here But the edit was honest and people

8:49

saw my truth and were like no I

8:51

stand with Maria right now. Yeah Yeah, you know,

8:53

do you feel ever misunderstood by the Bachelor? Nation,

8:56

I guess like is there something that we don't see

8:58

where you're like, this is actually who I am and

9:00

I'm like Misrepresented here

9:02

the honestly the opposite. Yeah, that was what

9:04

the best part of this all was We're

9:06

like, maybe I wasn't fully backed up in

9:08

the house Maybe I didn't feel protected in

9:10

the house because I had I didn't really

9:12

have anyone come to my defense Although I

9:15

made it very clear to the girls that

9:17

loved me in the house that I didn't

9:19

want anyone to come to my my defense

9:21

But when it was airing the

9:23

audience was like coming to my defense

9:25

the point where like they saw me

9:27

for exactly who I was and Loved

9:30

me and it was so honest where I was

9:32

like, wow Okay, they're seeing me for who I

9:34

am and they're appreciating it but also just seeing

9:36

that like You know all

9:39

this shit's happening and they don't understand it and

9:41

they don't get it and like they kind of

9:43

made me realize Okay maybe I really wasn't in

9:45

the wrong because if this entire audience now watching

9:47

the show back and Still riding

9:50

for me. It just it made me feel

9:52

really good. So maybe I was like, thank you. This is a

9:55

Validation it was just it was it isn't

9:57

it nice to feel supported for being You

9:59

are yes and like shocking because again you

10:02

go into a house where you're feeling like

10:04

no one ever No one really wants to

10:06

really get to know you or like people

10:08

are so against you for no reason and

10:10

you're like questioning yourself Yeah, so then coming

10:12

out of this and then hearing what other

10:14

people have to say. I've gotten the most

10:16

amazing supportive Messages where like I'm

10:19

almost like feeling undeserving of it, but it's your

10:21

syndrome Yeah, literally and like it just makes me

10:23

yeah that's why anyone who ever comes up to

10:25

me like I take the time to like talk

10:27

to them and like like love them off

10:30

too because I Am in all

10:32

of them and I appreciate it with all

10:34

my heart and it's been amazing. And so

10:36

for that, I love it I love because

10:38

I feel like the show has evolved so

10:40

much with just how we look at women

10:42

Yeah, and I feel like that's a

10:44

really Positive thing to

10:46

see for me because I I got so

10:48

much hate back in that day like nine

10:50

years ago for me Lord

10:53

I was so different Especially for bachelor

10:55

and that's why I loved you so

10:57

much because you weren't the typical you

10:59

didn't fit the molds in ways It

11:01

was a big old slut But it

11:03

was amazing and you made things spicy

11:06

you turned shit around for women like

11:08

me Who would move like you

11:10

walk so I can run that but I

11:12

know but seriously, I'm not on it. I loved

11:14

you I'm Maria. I I don't know. I

11:17

was like yes I get like this is a woman

11:19

that's gonna make you want to go on the show

11:21

because I you know I don't resonate with a lot

11:23

of the cookie cutter, you know And

11:26

ever and it's funny too because I do think

11:28

there's something about what's in the water in Canada

11:31

because you know A lot of

11:33

like southern girls like they did have that pressure

11:35

of being perfect growing up and they did have

11:37

this like expectation on them and

11:40

pageant girls and I just feel like in

11:42

Canada we were like be who

11:44

you are and Everybody like like if

11:46

you're a virgin, yeah, if you're a

11:48

little slut, yeah You just

11:50

have sex women supporting women Yeah,

11:53

like that's your choice bitch. Yeah, I

11:55

love it. Do you brothers are like

11:57

are you know I? I

12:00

have a sister who feels like a brother. She's got

12:02

like, I think we

12:04

both have dude energy. Like, like alpha-ish

12:06

energy. And I always had like

12:09

guy friends. I had girlfriends all the time. But

12:11

like, I love, I love guy energy. This is

12:13

really flattering. And I'm only using this as not

12:15

only a humble brag, but a transition. You

12:18

said that people like me made you want to go

12:20

on the show. Let's talk about

12:22

you wanting to go on the show and

12:24

people thinking how that's, you know, quote unquote,

12:26

the wrong reasons. I truly wanted

12:28

to go on the show to build a

12:30

brand. I was like, what a cool opportunity.

12:33

Like if I find love, cool.

12:35

Like that's going to be even better. And I think

12:37

it is possible on that show. And as we know,

12:39

it really is. But I went on because I thought

12:41

of it as an opportunity. I was kind of stuck

12:43

in my life. I didn't know where I was going

12:45

next. And people shit on that for some reason. And

12:47

I don't think it's a bad thing. I think it's

12:49

how you use it. Like once you get there, if

12:51

you're like, you know, like I'm

12:53

open or like, but I heard there's some

12:55

girls that were like, well, if I'm the

12:58

bachelorette, blah, blah, blah. Like there's, you know,

13:00

a fine line of being open and wanting

13:02

it to be an experience or blatantly going

13:04

on to like Joey over and use them

13:06

to get ahead. You know, I was like, I was like,

13:08

I want to build a brand and I'm open to falling

13:10

in love. Right. What was your

13:13

thought process? Well, I respect your honesty. And honestly, so

13:15

I actually mentioned this on another podcast where

13:18

like I had said like open

13:20

and honest, I wanted to be on

13:22

the show. I've always wanted to be on the show.

13:24

I really love that. So I was

13:26

like, I can see my, right? I'm like, okay. And

13:28

so people were actually like responding like very well to

13:30

that. They were like, wow, I respect the honesty. Like,

13:33

you know, a lot of girls will be like, oh,

13:35

you know, like I got asked to like, whatever. But

13:37

for me, I'm like, no, no, I was like, get

13:39

me on the show. What do I have to do?

13:42

Whatever. And it's funny cause Buddy

13:45

over there was like, Who's dipping you suck. No,

13:47

no, no, no, no, no. I'm kidding. I'm

13:50

just kidding. But no, Buddy over there was like, oh yeah.

13:52

She kept asking me to go on the show. And

13:54

there's a reason why I didn't get on as soon

13:56

as I probably wanted to. If it was

13:58

as easy as just asking him to get. me on. I probably

14:00

would have been on sooner. He, there's, there was

14:02

no help in that. So I don't know why

14:05

he would even say that or mention that, but

14:07

wait to clarify buddy is Nick and he tried

14:09

to make it seem like you were asking him

14:11

to get on the show. Yeah. Like buddy. No,

14:14

like I, if anything, I did this all

14:16

on my own. So yeah, thanks for that. For

14:18

trying to throw that out. Like it was a

14:20

dig. I already talked about how I liked and

14:22

I wanted to be on the show. Thank you

14:25

very much. I knew that. Yeah. Like get over

14:27

it. Um, anyways, um, um, we'll, we'll get

14:29

there. Yeah. And, and so I was going through

14:31

a point in my life where I was so

14:33

open to wanting something and I was

14:36

like, okay, I want to go on this reality

14:38

TV show because I thought I love the show.

14:40

It's always something I wanted to do, but also I

14:43

was so open to it where I was like, I'm

14:45

like the most ready, which is kind of nice that

14:47

I didn't get on any other time because I don't

14:49

think I've ever been more ready. Timing is every day.

14:51

And I had a psychic literally. She had told me

14:54

about how this was going to happen. It actually happened

14:56

the way she told me. I got to go see

14:58

her. Yeah, you do know. She was like, it was

15:00

crazy. I believe the psychic so

15:02

much. She literally predicted that I was going to

15:04

win dance with the star. She didn't even know

15:06

I was on TV. That was fantastic. Thank you.

15:09

Congratulations. Thank you. It's big accomplishment for me, but she

15:11

didn't even know that I was on TV. Like she had

15:13

no idea. I found her on a street corner and like,

15:15

she had no idea. I love those ones kind of thing.

15:17

Yeah. But it's exciting. Three years later, I was like saving

15:21

my own bathwater and sleeping with it under my bed

15:23

because she told me to. And I was like, stop

15:25

weird. You know what? Nothing bad happens. I would do

15:27

that too though. I know. Okay. So she told you

15:29

that it was going to play out the way it

15:31

did. Okay. There was another time that I was trying

15:33

to get on the show and it wasn't working out.

15:35

And I remember going to see her and

15:37

she was just like, listen, it's not going to

15:40

happen right now because something bigger is happening. You

15:42

don't see it yet. But she basically told me

15:44

the timeline and I just didn't want to believe

15:46

it. Cause I was like, no, but I want

15:48

to go now. But then anyways, I get

15:50

on Joey. I've actually funny enough. So I had contact

15:52

with a producer from prior, whatever. Yeah. Like when I

15:54

was trying to be on the show in the past

15:57

and as soon as I found out I was doing,

15:59

I'm like, please. put me in the running. I

16:01

was such a last minute addition. Really? Literally,

16:03

I was in LA August 27th for my

16:05

birthday. And as soon as I found

16:08

out it was Joey, I texted her. I'm like, please put me in the

16:10

running. I don't know what you got to do. Just get me in

16:12

there and interview you out to interview.

16:14

And then I got on and then three days

16:16

prior, they're like, okay, pack your coming to LA.

16:18

And I was like, three days? Yeah, three days

16:20

to pack everything. Like I had no idea what

16:22

I was getting my phone. Yeah. Three

16:24

days? Yeah. Oh, I

16:26

couldn't have done that. I like prepped for so long and

16:29

oh, that's crazy. Okay. You lucky girl. I couldn't. Yeah, I

16:31

know I didn't. I didn't get to. Well, I mean, you

16:33

did just find all your outfits for fire. Oh,

16:35

but yeah, people like took that the wrong way when

16:37

you said you had planned your outfits. You knew you

16:39

were going on. I was like, yeah, was I manifesting

16:42

my chance to be on the show? Absolutely. And I,

16:44

and I'm proud of that because totally, I

16:46

love the show. Yeah. And I'm not afraid to say it

16:49

because every girl that's on the show, trust

16:52

me when I tell you guys, they knew of the

16:54

show when they act like they don't, they know, they

16:56

knew what they were doing. I'm just being

16:58

honest about it. I wanted to be on the show and so

17:00

I did it. Thank you. Yeah. You

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19:54

think, I think, listen, all I'm saying is I hope

19:57

they got what they wanted out of this. Again,

20:00

the way of any ones like. You. Know

20:02

they want to do something for reasons go

20:05

do at ya go do it for he

20:07

says like go The new bachelorette is her

20:09

name Jan Jan Jan she wanted to be

20:11

the bachelorette obe so can I clarify something

20:13

I really so I said on a podcast

20:15

said that her and I'd spoken and she

20:17

and I said she looked really was ready

20:19

for that done and now I'm talking after

20:21

the show her and I got really really

20:23

close by and by the in the south

20:26

for and I were talking all the time

20:28

face having all the time and we just

20:30

talk about like how ready we want worry

20:32

we were. For like relationships yeah and like

20:34

the future and like what that holds and

20:36

you know she would talk to me about

20:38

how she put her all into this and what

20:40

I can honestly say about Jen is that

20:42

during the season she was so in it like

20:44

to the point where I was almost like.

20:47

Like she is dropping all the walls.

20:49

It was so uncomfortable sometimes for me

20:51

was it auto no no She was

20:53

giving and her all and I plotted

20:55

her and not and I loved her

20:57

for that. That's who she is. You

20:59

know she really wanted to see a

21:01

future a Joey and she gave it

21:03

her on and I admire her with

21:05

that in So when we talk after

21:07

the show obviously we're both single and

21:09

bachelorette came up and stuff like that

21:11

so obviously we were talk about relationships

21:13

are the more we won we see

21:16

for a future and she was so

21:18

ready to get engaged and to you

21:20

know get to that point in her

21:22

life where. That's. What I was trying

21:24

to say when I said she was so ready

21:26

because we always have hard to hurts so to

21:28

sit here and say that like I think it's

21:30

and miring that now we have a bachelorette who.

21:32

Is. So ready to go in that

21:35

position Warning that for her future

21:37

and is literally like so ready

21:39

lead to give her all to

21:41

someone else like. I was.

21:43

I. Respect that and I love that about

21:45

her. And I wasn't trying to say she was

21:48

in the house talking about bachelor. That's not what

21:50

I'm saying. God and the thing we're we're two

21:52

best friends at the time they signing about what

21:54

we wanted our life and she was so ready

21:56

and I respect her for at the time not

21:59

anymore know she is on her bash right journey

22:01

and she's gonna find the man and I cannot

22:03

wait to meet him and he better be good

22:05

to her. Oh we we use of friends oh

22:07

absolutely how that I don't mean like you we

22:10

used to be. oh of the I that I.

22:12

Love. Jan oh in a lot and that's

22:14

a thing. It's like you know coming out of

22:16

it and like having my experience the bachelorette I

22:19

just wanted to not speak on it. I took

22:21

my time off like I was imposing was in

22:23

lever because I just was there to support Jan

22:25

and to like put her she was like you

22:27

know she had been announced I wanted to just

22:30

show my support I don't care of a my

22:32

story about point and. It's. Done!

22:34

It's not me, it's Jen and I

22:36

just wanted everyone to know how ready

22:38

she was for a yeah well in,

22:41

in and again Next bringing it up

22:43

in such a negative way to be

22:45

like oh it's like she was saying

22:47

she gave her opportunities and know it

22:50

jams opportunity it was given to her

22:52

and it's it's hers and it's it's

22:54

He also knows as. Do. I

22:56

that there's usually vote for or flies and

22:58

people that they will think about yet or

23:00

it. that's actually not a secret and people

23:02

know that. Yeah and because they have to

23:05

take that seriously and they have to like

23:07

they don't wanna be like still that servers

23:09

and like we're gonna they're smart, they're not.

23:11

They're doing threat you gotta like keep people

23:13

that you know who would be best and

23:15

so yeah it's not like you like. well

23:17

it's not me So you're welcome Here Is

23:20

your it on a silver platter? The bachelorette

23:22

roll your like you know what? I'm not

23:24

ready? Okay, she's going for it. She's. Ready

23:26

Lot. So I literally.

23:28

Could have liberal. Yes,

23:31

Okay so we I mean if we're if

23:33

they say we can tell you because I

23:35

love him He's my favorite human. he's on

23:37

the planet. We the the coolest man. On.

23:40

Earth and like I love and respect

23:42

that man say so much and I

23:44

and I even said there are like

23:46

of like Jen. Is gonna

23:48

be perfect for this position. Not

23:51

only she reduce but like you

23:53

know like for representation she she

23:55

remembered. Well rounded bachelorette and I

23:58

don't know how. that come

24:00

across with what I've, how I've been supporting her

24:02

and what I've been saying. And so for anyone

24:04

to twist my words and to make it something

24:06

that it's not, I'm like, uh-uh, I have been

24:08

a Jen Stan since the day I

24:10

met her and how we supported each other in that house.

24:13

We would, you know, before, uh, we would go on dates,

24:15

we would write each other notes, like,

24:17

you know, encourage us to like, you know, kill it

24:19

that day. And you know, it's very isolating in that

24:22

house sometimes, you know, it's so, it's nice to have

24:24

that person you can go to. And you

24:26

know, obviously you don't want to know too much about what's

24:28

going on with each other's connection, but at the same

24:30

time, we always support each other. So what I'm

24:32

going to do now and moving forward is always

24:34

to show my support to her. And I cannot

24:37

wait to watch her season. And that

24:39

doesn't listen, I can share my story and

24:41

what happened with me, but also show and

24:43

share my support with her. It can be,

24:46

it can happen, you know, at the same time,

24:48

but I don't want anyone twisting my words or

24:50

thinking that I was saying

24:52

anything that, and let me let, set the record

24:54

straight. I am in full

24:56

support. Jen, she's deserving of this. And

24:59

that's the team. Jen, we wear a shirt right now that

25:01

says team. Jen, if I could buy, I didn't make it

25:03

yet. Well, I should have made it for this, but that's

25:05

yeah. I mean, people will always take what you say and

25:08

hear what they want to hear. Oh, and that's the point

25:10

that that's what pisses me off the most. It's like, if

25:12

you're not going to watch something in its entirety, I don't

25:14

want to hear what you have to say about it. It's

25:17

just fascinating what people will take and make into

25:19

their own story when they don't know the full

25:21

story, you know, like you're filming and I've said

25:23

this on my podcast before, you're filming 20, 17

25:25

to 20 hours, sometimes a day. You're

25:30

doing it seven days a week. And

25:33

it's, you probably made it to

25:35

what, nine weeks? Somewhere

25:38

around there. And people see one or

25:41

two hours every Monday of what they

25:43

would like to see because you need to, you

25:46

can't, you have to make everybody their own character. So what you

25:48

can, we are one dimensional on

25:50

television. We are not in real life. And

25:53

that same thing with your Instagram, even though you

25:55

have the complete creative control over it, people are

25:57

like, Oh, she tells me everything. She tells me

25:59

too much. she's crying or she's this or

26:01

she's annoying or that. I'm like, I have

26:04

24 hours in a day, you probably see 10 minutes of

26:06

my day and that's a lot. Like that, if I start

26:08

10 minutes of the day, that's a lot. But they never

26:10

know and they're always gonna take things that you say and

26:13

spin it into whatever they want. To believe.

26:15

Exactly, you know when I get it. And

26:17

even if it's for their own attention or

26:19

their own downloads or whatever. Or whatever works

26:21

for them. Whatever works for them. To make

26:23

their story better in their eyes. I always

26:25

try and with my podcast do the right

26:27

thing. Sometimes media will pick

26:30

up something and it'll be a headline that

26:32

I'm like, oh that sucks cause I hope

26:34

you read the article cause that was a good headline

26:36

but that's not actually how it happened. But my whole

26:39

heart wants to give people a voice. Share their

26:41

side of the story. And also

26:44

have it be fun and funny and lighthearted but

26:46

also deep or whatever it is that you're feeling.

26:49

And I mean I know you've talked about this

26:51

so many times now but with the whole Bachelorette

26:53

offer. And I'm sure you talked about it on

26:55

Call Her Daddy but I'm gonna ask again. You

26:57

turned it down. And I

27:01

actually respect that because you say

27:04

timing is everything. If you weren't gonna

27:06

be wholeheartedly in it and somebody else

27:08

was more ready for that opportunity and

27:10

situation. You think they're more

27:12

deserving. So I respect it. Do you regret

27:14

your decision at all? No. Okay.

27:17

Not even for a second. I think I actually

27:19

had like a realization that I did the

27:21

exact thing that I should have done. And

27:24

I'm very happy because it wasn't

27:26

my time and I was really putting

27:28

my mental health like first. And

27:31

I respect my decision. So

27:34

no, I don't regret it at

27:37

all. I love that because I...

27:40

How old are you? Okay,

27:42

first of all, I love that you're 29. That's

27:44

one of my favorite ages. Really? Yes.

27:47

Tell me why. Because it's such a pivotal moment for you.

27:49

Okay, that's what I'm thinking too. It's a pivotal age. 27

27:52

is actually really pivotal age too. Yeah. But

27:55

so is 29. 27

27:57

is a magical year. I Love 27. We

28:00

haven't yet. He's lucky at Twenty seven is

28:02

magical and pivotal. And the yeah, Twenty nine.

28:04

It's like I don't know what it is.

28:06

Something shifts in your brain where you're like

28:08

ready to enter your thirties and you feel

28:10

the most secure about yourself. Me and yeah

28:12

it's It's a really good places to be.

28:14

I was thirty when I was the bachelorette

28:16

yeah and I always say if I would

28:18

have been any younger like it wouldn't have

28:21

worked out when he that wasn't I mean

28:23

for me but I will say if they

28:25

ask me at the time mental health or

28:27

bad shred I would have said bachelorette I

28:29

would have not chosen. My mental health it as

28:31

I would win like I'll do that later. Yeah, I'll

28:33

be with her they are. You were saying like you

28:35

had a goal here Like you know you, you were

28:37

open to whatever. But also you're in a site your

28:39

brand new didn't you. Kill. That think you

28:41

will. I would have never thought that they pick

28:43

me as the best. Oh really oh you are

28:45

a few and for me I was like on

28:48

an eye on Kayla. Oh you know many of

28:50

the way that it happened for you though like

28:52

with the whole liked guys having to choose between

28:54

two beautiful women like say you hide it in

28:56

a way to like no one else I must

28:59

say that they didn't. I feel overly crazy as

29:01

way of to start the season as you I'm

29:03

sure didn't even know what is going to happen.

29:05

I mean I was probably the most common in

29:07

I'd been in my whole life at that point

29:10

because I'm. Not that confident now like that.

29:12

so I ought or know what? have an

29:14

omen backwards? yeah that ourselves as enron like

29:16

I'm like I was so confident. like who

29:18

was other you delusional? Oh I was probably

29:20

a little delusional society and I look back

29:22

and online down like ice. Where is that

29:24

girl that when I came out of it

29:26

and I was engaged when we broke up

29:28

I was like I'll never date a bachelor

29:30

guy again. Yeah. i did and

29:32

now i'm with all never date a

29:34

bad guy again and then i go

29:36

but they're hot in my ser jaime

29:38

know you and thoroughly know he went

29:40

through they have the always be remotely

29:42

like i was in an athlete era

29:44

and now like reality tv era was

29:46

perks lead over here and really subtle

29:48

any that years of the puck funny

29:50

i have lived for i would look

29:52

up there friggin schedule and i see

29:54

this is i love you because you're

29:56

so on and like i was in

29:58

america who care It's not embarrassing. Oh, it's

30:01

very embarrassing looking up their schedule. That's a whole

30:03

other level of like that's like you with boy

30:05

bands back in the day But you know god,

30:07

let's talk about the boy band Oh,

30:10

you know, actually this is actually something new because you

30:12

know what, you know I've seen the

30:14

questions and stuff like that. I

30:16

have always that's actually funny You

30:23

know what it is, you know what it is I So

30:25

I used to love going downtown getting a

30:27

lotels and going in concert concerts Yes And

30:30

then when you're downtown you meet people who know

30:32

people who know people and then you're just like

30:34

all of a sudden You're in I don't have

30:36

to party with these people Yeah, and you meet

30:38

them and you become friends with them But what

30:40

I've always said and I've always been this girl.

30:42

I'm always like never sleep

30:45

with these people Yeah, you want to hang out

30:47

with them become friends with them and be the

30:49

girl that they can never get Yes, and so

30:51

I've always maintained that and so when I heard

30:54

stories of like this one girl on tick-tock I'll

30:56

never forget and I and I wrote to her.

30:58

I'm like listen, you can keep the

31:00

story up. It's kind of entertaining I don't know if you

31:02

pulled out of your ass, but So

31:05

untrue. Yeah, like her dad's in a band and

31:07

her dad knew like people who got her

31:11

Anyways, anyways, there's a lot of stories of how I

31:13

know Certain band mates or

31:15

why I've been in connection with One Direction in

31:17

this person this person, but the reality of it

31:19

Yeah, they're jealous. I am jealous. No, the reality

31:21

is that you when you meet people, you know

31:23

They know people who know people and then you

31:26

just need to be the girl that Never

31:28

gets touched by these people so that they allow you

31:30

to be around and so I've been around them. Yes

31:33

Yes, have I hung out with certain

31:35

band mates? Sure. Which one's

31:37

Harry? I've met Harry before I

31:39

should have a really funny story Very what? Okay. First of

31:41

all, you're telling it but let me that I listen to

31:44

you and I go damn Oh shy. Should I add

31:46

your brain back in my 20s? I was like I live with

31:48

all of them No See

31:52

that was like I've I've always been such a they

31:54

used to call me Mother Mary in high school It's

32:00

okay, it's okay, it's okay. I like, no guttural.

32:02

Mother fairy. But that's the thing, that's why like,

32:04

like people are like, how are you the way

32:06

that you are like, like, I even said on

32:08

the show that I was an introvert and people

32:10

have written me apart like, uh, your clothes aren't

32:13

introverted. So are you talking about? And I'm like,

32:15

listen, when I dress up and I go

32:17

out and I meet people, whatever, like I

32:20

am very flirtatious, but like it's because

32:22

I don't know, maybe I just, I

32:25

don't know. That's just definitely who you are. I'm a

32:27

cute one. Yeah, but yeah, I know. As you should

32:30

flirt, as you should be. Harry, tell me your Harry

32:32

story. Oh, the Harry story. Oh shit. It's

32:34

actually, this is actually a really funny

32:36

story. So, so my dad and

32:38

I, we had, he had a meeting in New

32:41

York city, uh, for work. And so I went

32:43

with him because I was like, Oh, we're going to go

32:45

to New York. I'm, I'm, I'm coming to New York. I love New York. And

32:47

he booked a hotel and my

32:49

friends, okay, this is actually funny. So my

32:52

girlfriends at the time were all in New

32:54

York and they were like, Oh, you know,

32:56

one direction's here. Like whatever stay at this

32:58

hotel. And so now I'm, I'm traveling

33:00

for work with my dad and I go to

33:02

my dad. Okay, dad, we're going to stay at

33:04

a blank hotel. It was like this very bougie

33:06

ass hotel. He's like, okay, like whatever. Just

33:09

booked the hotel. We'll go. So I'm

33:11

with my dad now and I'm not thinking

33:13

anything. The girls were just like, Hey, stay here

33:15

because it's good area that is up. And like maybe

33:17

one direction might be staying there too. So

33:19

I didn't want to tell my dad that I was like, okay, dad, we're

33:21

going to just stay at this hotel. No questions

33:23

asked. And so we did. Anyways,

33:26

anyways, I wasn't thinking anything of it. I wasn't

33:28

even trying to be a part of like any

33:30

of that, but I was in the hotel and

33:32

I went out with my dad. We had a

33:34

meeting and then I got back and I had

33:36

to use the bathroom. So I was

33:38

going to piss my pants. So I'm

33:40

walking to the, to the, to the elevators and there

33:42

was two separate elevators, one for like a certain

33:44

amount of floors and the other one for another amount

33:47

of floors. And there was a bunch of fan

33:49

girls on one side. I was like, Oh, this

33:51

screams. There must be boy band

33:53

men around. So Then I

33:55

get to the elevator, the elevator, elevator

33:57

doors open. I hear a gas from

33:59

like the girls on the. I turn

34:01

over it's here in his bodyguard out

34:03

walking the steal my elevator she walks

34:05

into the elevator and in the the

34:07

security gargoyles there's like three like no

34:10

income and I'm staying at this will

34:12

tell i am a paying customer is

34:14

miles how i the pair from it

34:16

appears my band's hello of go so

34:18

I'm have a view of hands so

34:20

then hit the security guard goes like

34:22

this so I walk up and ago

34:24

exists for Harry and a security guard

34:26

guy was my fucking elevator and I

34:28

believe this I did Harrys. Or flopping. Whatever

34:30

said in the doors close he goes up. Then.

34:33

I'm we've elevator as whatever I'm waiting the

34:35

elevator doors open. it's a security guard. He

34:37

comes back to me those i want to

34:39

tell you like airy thought that was the

34:42

funniest thing and he wants to meet you

34:44

know yeah oh god I never told the

34:46

story ever in my life like you know

34:48

where the girls. Many. If there's

34:51

anyone I was there that day that saw me give

34:53

the finger to Harry Please stand up All we have

34:55

as ours iconic Because who was in a do that?

34:57

I was like. When. I'm when I'm

34:59

in his life and screw you. I don't care who

35:01

you are, I have to go pee and my room's

35:03

up there. But a nice some guy. The guy here,

35:05

he wants to be you. Bola.

35:08

And yeah and I'm I. I went to

35:10

go meet on that night very believe he

35:12

had a good laugh about everything and and

35:14

oh my god knows us but within that

35:16

was that yeah right I Lewis I'm like

35:18

I'm here with my dad on you know

35:20

and respectfully and she's very respectful was very

35:22

sweet which is like a nice like owners

35:24

and you know the story. I have not

35:26

told the sorry to be honest to like

35:28

anyone but I thought it was just like

35:30

the funniest thing as the way I gave

35:32

him the thing or ages was like that

35:34

them and mean the gutter and I got

35:36

ever that. It will be on my tombstone. It

35:38

was. It reflects I am camera. How's that? by

35:41

a lot of got a piece only grows up

35:43

he i don't give a shit if winter who

35:45

your name of good slavery i don't care of

35:48

brevity of appears i will i wouldn't give you

35:50

thing or but he who is that have a

35:52

digital hi kid you bristle getting harrys still knows

35:54

do think he saw you know tv and was

35:56

like oh of it gave the bigger than i

35:58

am made over i'm sure if I ever saw

36:01

made out I don't know about that I don't know about any of that um

36:05

respectful meeting green we just said hello I'm

36:07

meeting right now it was very nice that

36:09

he got his security guard to like come

36:11

get me and like it was like okay

36:13

but I really need to pee but it

36:15

was really nice to meet him honestly respectful

36:17

nothing like that okay um but Evan Peters

36:19

is you ever watched American

36:22

Horse Story no I will though

36:24

yeah he's so he's just a hot guy that

36:26

like have your foot into his DMS he doesn't

36:28

have it social media oh even hotter I that's

36:30

what I said damn I am so into him

36:33

yeah no social media but back to like bachelor

36:35

guys and stuff like that I was like this

36:37

is a good circle back so would you date

36:39

somebody in the bachelor franchise and if

36:41

you did who's your top celebrity crush and if

36:43

you say Tyler Cameron I'm gonna throw a choppy

36:45

okay that's everybody's I'm like come on what you

36:48

know oh so so I met Tyler on at

36:50

stagecoach yeah actually I met a bunch of celebrities

36:52

at stagecoach who knew who I was and I

36:54

wasn't that weird shit my pants I know it's

36:57

the craziest thing ever yeah I I met Tyler

36:59

Cameron went up to him like Tyler he's like

37:01

Maria I'm like oh you know everyone wants

37:03

us together but absolutely not no

37:05

I think he's amazing man I think

37:07

he's so career oriented and like he's

37:09

strong and has nice abs whatever but

37:11

he's amazing and he's so sweet and

37:14

he's the sweetest person ever but no

37:16

I like nothing nothing going on with

37:18

that would I date anyone I don't

37:20

I don't think so because what I've

37:23

realized now with how people take things

37:25

to like next level I take

37:27

a photo with someone nicely and then all of a sudden it's

37:29

like are you dating them yeah what's going on with that and

37:31

I'm like how many DMs I got building like Maria is

37:33

all cozy with Jason oh my god no absolutely

37:35

not and I told Jason I was like Jason

37:38

by the way I'm going on Caitlin's broadcast what

37:40

did he say no he's very he's

37:42

like good for you like go for it like he if

37:44

he ever said anything bad about you yeah I

37:46

would be like absolutely I don't know I don't

37:49

like what people say if they if I got

37:51

to bed I take a photo I'm like oh

37:53

no if only you know oh trust me I'll

37:55

get going only my girlfriend Katie Maloney we take

37:57

photos and people like are you gay now I'm

37:59

like Oh, I'm a

38:01

bisexual queen now. Oh, same thing.

38:04

Oh, no. Okay. There you go No, I you

38:06

know, I mentioned on the podcast that I had

38:08

made out with my ex-boyfriend's mr They

38:11

called her mistress. She's a friend of mine and I

38:13

don't call her that but It was a joking way

38:15

to just say like it was the girl that my

38:18

ex cheated with I just made out

38:20

with her But anyways, they're like now everyone in

38:22

my DMS are like, oh you bisexual queen. I'm

38:24

like, you know what? Whatever whatever you want Hey,

38:26

you know what? I never know how to and

38:28

I don't want to label myself I always say

38:30

I'm attracted to energy. Okay, there you go. Yeah,

38:32

and I'm like, I'm a I'm a I like

38:34

people Queen Yes. Yeah as you said this

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additional information. What's

41:38

the rock bottom moment in your life that you can

41:40

think of where you're like, holy shit, that was the

41:42

biggest growth period of my life. I had gone to

41:44

like a really, really, really like traumatic like

41:46

car accident where I almost like lost my life, like

41:49

bad. I had talked about one on the show

41:51

where I, I, my mom got into one when I was like

41:53

one, but this happened a couple of years ago, 2018.

41:56

And like, I went through like

41:58

a depressive episode. to the point

42:01

where like I didn't want to

42:03

see like anyone. They got to the

42:05

point where I was pushing everyone away and no

42:07

one really knows this. I don't like to talk

42:09

about it because it's like, it's such a weird

42:12

place to be in. Cause you, you go back,

42:14

when you talk about it, you kind of like

42:16

go back to that moment. You're like, oh, I'm

42:18

not that person. I'm stronger than that. But like

42:20

it brought me to a very, very dark place.

42:23

And I think that was in ways my rock

42:25

bottom because the mindset that I was in was

42:27

something that I never experienced before. It's scary. And

42:29

it's scary because it's something I

42:31

felt alone. I wanted to be alone and

42:34

I made myself be alone and like dealing

42:36

with that was just so hard. But like,

42:38

were you like badly injured? That's the thing.

42:41

Like if you had looked at the car

42:43

in the scene, like people thought I was

42:45

dead, but I walked out like all is

42:47

good. Like it was, it was

42:49

bad. Like I went to, you know, I had

42:52

a little like minor black eye.

42:55

You know, I had to go do therapy for

42:57

a bit. Like physical therapy, my

42:59

whatever, whatever. But like the way I saw it

43:02

was like, no, I walked out alive. So I

43:04

have nothing really to complain about, but then it's

43:06

like, Oh, it's not complain. It's how you feel.

43:08

I know, but that's how. That's a traumatic event.

43:10

Yeah. Yeah. Going through a

43:12

car accident like that and seeing or having

43:14

a near death experience or seeing that, that's a

43:16

traumatic thing to go through. Yeah. I knocked out

43:19

for a couple of minutes, like, cause I got hit twice. And

43:21

so when I had passed out and then I woke up,

43:24

I didn't even look into the mirror because I was scared

43:26

to see how I looked. And it was

43:28

funny. The story was like, I was out for coffee

43:30

with my dad and then he had made the right.

43:32

I had made the left and I had just gone

43:34

to the accident. So I had to like call my

43:36

dad to tell him to come back. But again, I

43:38

don't even know how I look like. So I just

43:40

see glass everywhere. My, my back door

43:43

is up the street. Oh my God. Glass

43:45

everywhere, glasses in my hair, all these things.

43:47

And I remember just being like, I

43:49

don't even know if my face is like

43:51

in one piece right now. I feel pain,

43:53

but I think I'm okay. So

43:56

I remember just like, anyway, it was a very traumatic event, but it's

43:59

like that moment. was nothing. It was like

44:01

the aftermath of like those thoughts, those negative thoughts

44:03

that like put you in such a dark place.

44:05

But it made me, you know,

44:08

like really appreciate life

44:10

after that. Like just like be

44:12

more appreciative like every day that I have on earth. And

44:14

like that was kind of like another thing I said in

44:17

the house, like with the girls when like I

44:19

don't want to tolerate these little stupid like

44:21

stupid fights. Like I don't want even want

44:23

to entertain this. Like there are bigger things

44:25

in life that can happen. Like there are

44:28

people dying. Like to me, this is such

44:30

a joke. So, you know, having gone through

44:32

some things that have been traumatic in my

44:34

life, it just builds character and

44:36

like, I don't know, it makes me stronger, I guess.

44:38

But it does. No, that's like, that's like my biggest

44:40

fear in life is getting into car. Yeah. Really terrifying.

44:43

I don't want to see this. This is

44:45

a weird way to switch into the next

44:47

topic, but we need to clear up some

44:49

stuff. I mean, please, please, you mentioned dropping

44:52

some tea lately about knowing Nick. Yeah. Obviously

44:54

before the show, how did this all happen?

44:56

How did you meet him? Actually funny. My

44:59

friends and I like, we were again fans

45:01

of the show and we like Nick. We

45:03

thought Nick was great like at the time,

45:05

whatever. And so through social

45:07

media, like we started talking and it started

45:09

like, you know, we would talk all

45:11

the time, like literally all the time. And we

45:14

were, we were just like building a friendship and

45:17

I did that too with him. Yeah. Oh

45:19

yeah. I know. That's why you came on

45:22

season. But yeah, okay. No, that was it. And but

45:24

do you ever met in person? Oh yeah. Yeah. Oh,

45:26

okay. Oh yeah. I mean, I know. Yeah. People were

45:28

wondering if that was, if it was whatever. No, of

45:30

course we have. Oh, so it was like a little

45:32

like fun, like a meet. You met him, you talked

45:35

to him, you hung out with him. Yeah. And then

45:37

what happened from there? No, I mean, I

45:39

ended up, he went, he had told me when

45:41

he was going to be bachelor and I congratulated

45:43

him and he went to go to that. Okay.

45:45

And then I

45:48

got a boyfriend at the time and yeah,

45:50

we were just like always found

45:52

our way kind of like back to

45:54

communicating, but it was again, very always

45:56

friendly. Did Nick play any sort of role

45:58

in your journey to become A. Mean know to

46:01

death and on about absolutely not.

46:03

Now. And absolutely not. He

46:05

didn't want the so then how

46:07

do you feel with his wife

46:09

now calling you delusional? Yeah, you

46:11

know, Teach. Their own like a

46:13

sassy you think that gay So I

46:16

had set on the podcast. My

46:18

a little conspiracy theory that I had. I

46:20

was saying it and in. Such

46:22

a joking matter that I got our

46:25

died. Yeah, okay. I. Thought I

46:27

came across as me being like all I

46:29

said was in the moment Can you imagine

46:31

now killing a guy you were talking to

46:33

who is part of this world? I'm telling

46:35

you if you want to show you might

46:37

be a villain and this is why and

46:40

you not understanding because when you hear villain

46:42

you think will villain people he villains yeah

46:44

I would I be a villain A I

46:46

don't know what if a bachelor villain is

46:48

different than like a villain villain apparently separate

46:50

Anyways. Enemies. Through here died

46:52

tell you that and then. After.

46:54

Getting off the show the girl that was

46:56

villain isaac you the entire season for no

46:59

reason. Now if you are giving her reason

47:01

a villain I view fine but it's literally

47:03

for no reason and then you see them

47:05

in a picture together after the show. All

47:08

I said in a laughing matter. Joking

47:10

hi he he ho I literally didn't even

47:12

mention it to anyone like excellent I went

47:14

around telling people are i didn't even message

47:16

city to be a sunni on were you

47:18

friends with this person like know I just

47:20

don't pull it out of i just want

47:22

to hurt and I was shooting the shit

47:24

with her as a goat. This is what

47:26

I thought in the moments yeah see not

47:28

photo of the Holy Ted's like. Ah

47:31

the guy that's a there's another girl

47:33

that there aren't a picture together? What

47:35

the hell is that? But I wasn't

47:37

being serious role so. next decide

47:39

to run with died and think that it was

47:41

a serious thing that i actually felt and thought

47:43

that he had this poll for small no one's

47:45

going to make me a villain room the only

47:47

version of going to me villain is me and

47:49

i'm not and that's why wasn't but it was

47:52

just something that kind of cross my mind maybe

47:54

like it maybe and way that i may be

47:56

my to censor girl the com come after our

47:58

know but it was a joke I'm just so

48:00

curious. It was a joke. If

48:02

he, if you and him, did

48:04

something go south

48:06

where he, did you

48:09

guys lose respect for each other along the way?

48:11

Like if it was all fine, why does he

48:13

seem to want to talk shit about you? That's

48:16

a good question. I sat on the caller

48:18

daddy sofa and I said, I congratulate him

48:20

that there's no animosity between us, that I'm

48:23

happy to see him grow. I said all

48:25

the nicest things because we haven't spoken in

48:27

a while, but I just thought that out

48:29

of mutual respect because we didn't end badly,

48:31

that we kind of just went our separate

48:33

ways and we respected each other at that

48:36

point. I thought him seeing me on the

48:38

show, he would be like, oh my God,

48:40

my girl Maria, go off. But

48:43

then when he kind of like was breathing right

48:45

past me on the, like, doing his recaps and

48:47

like, okay, that's fine. He didn't say anything bad

48:49

about me until- He didn't say anything about you

48:51

until- Yeah, yeah, that's true. Also, he did and

48:53

people were coming to me being like, how are

48:55

you going to let him say this shit about

48:58

you? When I opened up about

49:00

a car accident I got with my mom when I was

49:02

one year old, one year old where I was actually announced

49:04

dead at the scene and oh yeah,

49:06

it's traumatic. Nick was like, what

49:08

was Maria's story then? What even was

49:11

it? But even when he did that, I

49:13

stayed silent. I was like, okay, maybe

49:15

he was just asking questions. Maybe

49:18

he was just curious. I was like, you know

49:20

what? I stayed silent. I didn't

49:22

put my two cents and I was like, it's

49:24

okay, it's okay, whatever. I would rather a guy

49:26

from my past breathe right

49:28

past me than talk shit about me the entire time.

49:30

So I was kind of like, okay, you know what,

49:32

Nick, go off. Do your thing. I

49:34

don't care. I mean, whatever. Yeah, it kind

49:36

of like, it shocked me to hear his response to what

49:38

I kind of did on Call Her Daddy. I

49:41

thought he would kind of laugh that off, but

49:43

also appreciate that I was being very supportive and

49:45

giving kind words. I didn't know the timeline of

49:47

the wedding. Sorry for how that worked out. I

49:50

didn't know when shit was going to air. I

49:52

don't have your wedding on my calendar.

49:55

Sorry, but I really don't. But I thought I

49:57

was being as pleasant as I could. Like

50:00

you didn't do anything wrong. Like, oh my

50:02

God, you spoke, you protected me on my

50:04

wedding day. No, but literally. And like, I

50:07

was just at the end of

50:09

the day, like putting rumors to rest, because if

50:12

one of us, if one

50:14

of us didn't unlike the other's

50:16

Instagram photos, if one of

50:18

us didn't have anything to hide,

50:20

I mean, the one of

50:22

us that has nothing to hide is sitting in this room with you.

50:25

And I'm sorry to say it, but I,

50:27

you know, I was thinking of coding, quoting

50:29

Krenzic Lamar right now. I was just going

50:32

to say, listen, like

50:34

a wise man once said like, don't tell

50:36

lies about me and I won't tell truths

50:38

about you. How do you respond to, to

50:41

the criticism in general, whether it be on

50:43

his podcast, on the internet,

50:45

like how do you respond to criticism? You

50:47

know, I've had a lot, you know, I've

50:49

had the most

50:51

amazing support since leaving the show

50:53

and like, you know,

50:55

and whatever, but obviously there are the ones

50:57

that, you know, come at you a little

51:00

bit, whether it's my looks, whether it's the

51:02

way I dress, whether it's like how plain

51:04

Jane I am to some people,

51:06

they, they're upset that I don't wear earrings.

51:08

I was considering wearing earrings today. I

51:11

was considering, I was like, maybe I should, she was like, are you gonna

51:13

wear a necklace or an ear? I'm like, nah. The

51:16

criticism of like how I act and who I

51:18

am, like, this is how, this is what I

51:20

say. There are the people that get me. And

51:23

when the people that get me, I respect

51:25

like you, there are so

51:27

many podcasts. I don't know. Do you know Dave Neil?

51:29

Yeah, of course. I love

51:31

that man. He's a king. Anyways. Oh, oh, the

51:33

mom and dad podcast. Oh yeah. They're amazing. Oh

51:36

yeah. When I tell you they got me to

51:38

a tee of who I am as a person and

51:40

they recap the season

51:43

and they recap me to the point where I'm

51:45

like, okay, if people like you guys get me,

51:48

the people that don't and they want to criticize me, please

51:51

do. Yeah. Cause you know what? At the end of the

51:53

day, I can, sometimes when they write me things or like

51:55

they're, they're mad about something, I learned from him like, okay,

51:57

maybe I'll change that or maybe I'll do that. A little

51:59

constructive. Yeah, you know I respect it.

52:01

I get lost in it. Yeah. Yeah. No,

52:03

no, no. I I've been

52:05

called ugly I've been called this her

52:07

teeth or this that I oh, I

52:09

don't care I'm like okay when when

52:11

you get to a point in life

52:13

where you've accepted yourself for exactly

52:16

who you are Knowing

52:18

that you're not gonna be the best-looking. You're

52:20

not gonna be the prettiest You're not gonna

52:22

be the coolest and just accepting that there's

52:24

power in that there is because when I

52:26

were gonna come at you You're like, okay.

52:29

It's okay. You are as you know, they're

52:31

here and you're where you are and it's

52:33

you know It's you we all know the what's

52:35

the girl's name who does the they're in the

52:38

bleachers? Yes Renee

52:41

Brown Renee Brown like oh go just go listen

52:43

to Bernie Brown and you'll be okay and last

52:45

but not least What is next

52:48

like I feel like you're like people this is not

52:50

the last you'll see of me. Well, what is next?

52:52

Um, well, I'll say this like, you

52:55

know, I have opportunity But

52:57

you've got a lot of opportunities I The

53:00

way I see is like this like unless I know

53:02

hunt 100% things are set in stone Yeah,

53:04

I don't like to talk about it because I'm

53:06

like, oh, I don't know if it's gonna happen

53:08

What's gonna whatever but there are down to the

53:10

universe on your own. Yeah. Okay. Yeah, and I

53:13

think I think you know I actually want to

53:15

ask you how was dancing at the stars? Oh

53:17

god, I'll tell you at dinner that I'm

53:19

like an hour Rob Mills time. Yeah.

53:21

Oh, yeah, that's what you should do That's

53:27

something I would be interested in doing and it

53:29

could be like what's next really what would you

53:31

want? I would want Five

53:34

no people. Okay. Can you sweet

53:36

that would be a great next move?

53:38

It's not cuz I'm like, listen,

53:41

I dance in the past I'm not good. I don't

53:43

claim that I'm good But it would be like that's

53:45

the coolest thing that you ever did and not only

53:47

did she just do it she won

53:50

Like It's like the let there's levels to this

53:52

shit. I think if you just be fun and

53:54

exciting I think it's something that like I Love

53:56

it and you'd crush it. Oh, thank you. And

53:58

Also, is there anything?? That you want to

54:00

clear up before it or do we hit everything

54:03

home. I think I pretty much. It

54:05

everything I just want. You know I

54:07

would never would sit with the same

54:09

bite, the hand that feeds me. You'd

54:11

never do that. That's yeah. I would

54:13

never like again anything that I ever

54:15

try to do. whatever is because and

54:17

me even trying to become like. Or

54:20

continue with the franchise's because I love to

54:22

do the backed me up for it and

54:25

also because of the produces I were behind

54:27

me and supported me like I want people

54:29

to know I love this show. Yeah and

54:31

I will never. And. I want view

54:33

the understand. I'm not unhappy with how things

54:36

went. Everything I've been for a reason. And.

54:38

This useful and and it's it'll getting

54:40

a lot all as giving delusion. I

54:42

am delusional. This any not, we love

54:44

you for that. Thank you thank you.

54:47

I appreciate that and I will continue.

54:49

To. Be delusional. I'm Gail in Brazil. I'll

54:51

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