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a mose machine. Funny story part is

3:01

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3:04

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3:06

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3:26

Live on tape. It's the fastest

3:28

hour in podcasting. This is

3:30

Never Not Funny. Now, here's

3:32

your host, Jimmy Pardo. Hello,

3:37

I'm David. Welcome to

3:39

the program. The

3:41

award winning podcast, Never Not Funny. We

3:44

welcome you in on a holiday here in Los Angeles. I

3:47

guess all over the world. It's a

3:49

holiday, but here, you see it on the highways and

3:51

the byways. People really just stay home from work on

3:53

a day like today. Now, if anybody

3:55

in the room can name the holiday, I'll give a dollar.

3:57

Garan, can you name it? No. They're

4:00

good. I have no idea what you're talking about. Matt,

4:02

couldn't. April, we're in April, right? This is April

4:04

22nd? This is April 22nd, yum.

4:09

Oh, what do you got? Is it Arbor Day?

4:11

Nope. Well, it's Earth Day, but that is

4:13

not a holiday. I mean, it's a

4:15

day. I haven't. This

4:17

isn't where your Columbus Indigenous Peoples Day

4:19

would land. No. Is

4:22

it Easter 2? It is. It's Easter 2. Garren

4:24

got it. If any, Elliot, you should know more than

4:26

anybody in the room. So this is

4:28

your Passover? I don't know. There's something going on. Pesach.

4:31

I know the Trump trial ended early

4:33

today to accommodate the Jewish holiday. Those

4:36

are the words I heard. And as I

4:38

turned off of my side street onto

4:40

La Cienega, which

4:42

is usually a traffic

4:44

jam, I was

4:46

like, I wonder what holiday it is? And then

4:49

I heard, as the Trump trial is out because

4:51

of the Jewish holiday. So it's Passover,

4:53

right? This is the right time of year. I'd

4:55

have to look it up. I'm a bad religious

4:57

Jew. Well, I heard some chatter as well on Facebook

5:00

about people looking for a, I never say I write

5:02

a Seder. That they have nowhere

5:04

to go. So they were looking

5:06

for one. I

5:08

say, do it alone at your house. Why burden

5:10

somebody else with it? But

5:14

that's your way, isn't it, Elliot? Tradition.

5:18

Yeah, tradition. It's

5:21

a together holiday. Yeah,

5:23

I know what it is. I get it. I'm married to a

5:25

Jew. I've known many a Seder. They

5:27

are boring. They

5:29

really are. And long. And also, there's

5:32

a lot of reading out loud, which,

5:34

you know, Catholicism has a bunch of that. So we're not alone

5:37

in that. No, you are. And I'm going to tell you how

5:39

you're alone in that. We don't do that around a Christmas table.

5:41

No, but if you're a good Catholic, you're

5:44

going and listening to somebody read two, three

5:46

times a week. You're going there. Yeah, yeah,

5:48

yeah. This isn't you at your

5:50

home, hey, come on over for a Christmas dinner. And then

5:53

you sit around the table and then you all take turns

5:55

reading from a book. That ain't

5:57

that ain't happening in Catholicism. We're

5:59

busy trying. to fuck children behind

6:01

the altar. That's what they're doing.

6:04

I didn't realize that was a cannon. That

6:06

is what they're doing. Not me. Of course,

6:08

I'm not a creep. Well, I'm just saying

6:12

Judaism isn't the only religion with boring stuff in

6:14

it. And also the food is

6:16

like half terrible, but that's kind of the point

6:19

because you're supposed to remember you're supposed to be

6:21

suffering. Yeah. Well, so Judaism has a thing where

6:23

it's like you make a

6:25

point of having a holiday for apologizing and

6:27

you make a point of having a holiday

6:29

for suffering and you make a point of

6:31

having a holiday for remembering that you ran

6:34

out of oil. Like these are Jewish

6:36

holidays. Yes. From my very unreligious Jewish

6:38

upbringing. Well, sounds about right to me

6:40

based on the many a meal I've

6:42

been to over the last 25 years.

6:47

I don't believe we're going to one this year. And

6:49

wait, pardon me. Knock on

6:51

wood. There you go. Because they are

6:53

a snooze. Yeah. And like,

6:56

my mom made something called Matzah and Eggs.

6:59

Have you ever had that? With her eggs.

7:01

Oh, it's fair. It's kind of like a

7:03

French toast type situation, which makes it sort

7:05

of fun and delicious. Matzah

7:08

is terrible. Yeah. It is

7:11

saltless, saltines. But

7:13

it is also there to remind you about how there

7:15

was one day where Pharaoh was being an asshole and

7:17

you didn't have time to wait for your bread to

7:20

rise. Like that's, this is Judaism.

7:22

You're welcome. Thank you. And so

7:24

to get back at us, you've taken over

7:27

Hollywood. So you created, you're apologizing on behalf

7:29

of it because

7:33

you were, you created Judaism. I

7:35

mean, I'm just, I'm just, look, we, in,

7:37

in today's world, whether you did the thing

7:39

or not, if you're even remotely related to

7:41

it or know that it exists, you're supposed

7:44

to apologize for it as I understand. So

7:46

I'm, I'm apologizing for Matzah. Well, and that

7:48

gets right back to your, your holiday. Exactly.

7:50

But that's not this holiday. No, this isn't

7:52

the apologizing. No, this is, this is, I

7:54

believe Passover is the whole Pharaoh

7:56

thing where it's a suffering. Is it not? Well, it is

7:59

a suffering one, but And it's specifically like I

8:01

think, look, I do not, the

8:04

following statement does not represent all Jews, Jewish

8:07

people. I don't even know if I'm allowed to

8:09

say Jews because I think some people think Jew is negative. Like

8:12

it was, anyway, whatever. I

8:15

believe this is, you know, Moses fleeing the

8:17

Pharaoh and that whole story. So we were

8:19

passed over. That's the passover where we weren't,

8:22

essentially our children weren't murdered because God knew that

8:24

we were cool and, but murdered the

8:26

Pharaoh's children because you wouldn't let the

8:28

Jews and the slaves go.

8:31

Let me ask you a question. Should we be leaving

8:33

that door open for Elijah during this recording? I mean,

8:35

we do have extra chairs. We could. Isn't

8:38

that where you pit the lamb's blood in the door? I

8:40

don't know if it was lamb's blood, but there definitely was

8:42

something on the door. Definitely. What about

8:44

the metal band Lamb of God? Should we

8:46

be playing them today? Is that something we

8:49

should be playing? I don't know. Or

8:51

should we ever be playing them? Put

8:53

their album cover on the door. I'm going to land on

8:55

no. I mean, there are Jews for Jesus. I remember them.

8:58

I don't know if they're still around. I'm sure they're still around.

9:00

Yeah. Even if it's three

9:02

guys sitting around and they're still happening. All

9:04

right. So, Garin, did you find out what

9:06

today is? It's a passover. Okay. Just

9:09

to confirm. Yeah. That the,

9:11

well, I think the answer is somebody looking for a

9:13

Seder gave us our answer. We

9:16

when, you know, sadly, we know my mother-in-law

9:18

passed away, but if she were

9:20

here, I know that we'd be going over there at some point

9:22

this week for it. And I'm not suggesting

9:25

that that isn't going to happen anyway. There may be a,

9:27

hey, don't forget the Thursday we're going over

9:29

to my dad's or something happening. We're

9:32

going to my cousin's and then I will

9:34

probably get sick. That

9:38

will be probably what happens. The

9:40

other thing I don't remember off the top of my head is how many days passover

9:42

is. I think

9:45

it's more than one day. It's been

9:47

a really long time since I've observed

9:49

it. Well, the words are the beginning

9:51

of passover. Right. So, it is A

9:53

duration of time. But I Know that

9:55

when we have gone to Danielle's cousin's,

9:57

it'll be like, well, we can have.

10:00

They have the dinner any days with any

10:02

time between the state and the state nam

10:04

and so. Five days. Or

10:07

member of the last for seven days And

10:09

Israel. And Eight days outside of Israel. Okay,

10:11

eight days here when we can suffer one

10:13

more day now because your whole premise was

10:15

suffering. Why do I get to get on

10:17

this? What? What? I would guess? Based.

10:19

On what I understand of sort of

10:21

Israeli modern custom, like just living in

10:24

Israel, you're pretty Jewish just by doing

10:26

that to be probably to save off

10:28

a day burial as as though they're

10:30

yeah, they did it. As used traditionally

10:32

observe, one seats is a cedar cedar

10:34

wait later. If and if it in

10:36

Israel and to one on each of

10:38

the first two nights isn't that sad.

10:41

Jewish. Diaspora. Jasper. I guess

10:43

that means outside of his. I guess the is a

10:45

deadline so that was when the cousin says we could

10:47

do it Either of these. It's from either of these

10:49

mice the first two nights that sounds are. Either way,

10:51

I don't think we have to go to one this

10:53

year. And. I may do a

10:55

dance of some sort because I get

10:57

north and store Jewish listeners mother up

10:59

on board says say it's it's it's

11:01

intentional, it it's events I notice. better

11:04

educational, dinner or you know. I'll say

11:06

this. I. Found it educational the

11:08

of as first few years and I actually

11:10

didn't I didn't I didn't did not enjoy

11:12

it. I enjoy the learning about something other

11:15

than I'm not aware of ah or that

11:17

I'm not cultured in our but by year

11:19

twenty five now. At

11:21

I'll do my own passover. That's

11:23

where I'm at. Yeah well, as has added

11:25

a Passover Pets over. There are there different

11:27

kinds of ways of doing it too because

11:30

like I believe there's one where like it

11:32

could be a couple of hours of educational

11:34

content and then some folks are like they

11:36

read the first but the pages and then

11:38

let's have dinner were closer to that. know

11:40

if if read it started as that. And.

11:43

Then it started expanding all of it and then when

11:45

assert expanding like would have preferred to get this is

11:47

aimed at no real live out your basics now you're

11:49

ready for the about yeah no thanks man So Jimmy

11:51

I will say that I think one of the things

11:53

on the special. ed pray the try

11:56

that i don't know the name i'm and has

11:58

all the various foods that you supposed eater Remember,

12:00

this was good, this was bad, this was kind of a

12:02

little difficult, this was kind of bitter. There's

12:04

an egg there. Yeah, I don't eat it. Yeah, well,

12:06

you know, you're allergic to eggs, so maybe you just can't

12:08

go. I can't go at all because they would have been touched

12:11

on the other food. You know what? You

12:13

bring up a good point. You bring up a good

12:15

point. Although I want to say that at

12:17

one of, at Danielle's Cousins, they

12:20

may have been vegan eggs, like the

12:22

representative for the egg, because I believe

12:24

that is a vegan family. Oh, wow.

12:26

Yeah. So even less

12:29

delicious. Yeah, so a

12:31

bland meat hill just got blander. Yeah,

12:35

it's, well, best of luck to you folks

12:37

that are enjoying this show and then sitting down with your

12:40

families and reading from the, whatever

12:43

the book is called. The Passover Haggadah,

12:46

I believe is the correct term. I don't think you said

12:48

anything there, but that's cool. I think you just said some

12:50

noise. He's laughing like he said something

12:52

that you clearly didn't know what the pronunciation was.

12:55

Haggadah. What, I don't know. Fake

12:57

your, wait, haggulah. I mean, you can look it

12:59

up, but I believe it's, you're probably right. You

13:01

can look it up. Are there haggadah or haggadah?

13:04

I don't remember if there's a haggadah in there.

13:06

I'm sure there is. There's a lot of chucks

13:08

in Hebrew. They're not everywhere, but they're there. That's

13:13

where you see them more than anywhere else, at least

13:15

in our world. Like I don't see a lot of

13:17

chucks anywhere outside of that. I

13:19

want to say Persian may have some chucks

13:22

in it. Yeah, the Persian. H-A-G-G-A-D-A-H. Yeah. So

13:25

that doesn't necessarily prove there's no chucks,

13:27

but probably not. Sounds

13:30

like a quarterback calling a play.

13:32

Yeah, right. Haggadah one, haggadah

13:34

two. Haggadah, haggadah. It just has to be

13:36

offensive. It could be. I

13:39

did just recently send, so there's the book

13:41

that has the things you're supposed to say

13:43

and read. And then there's

13:45

a special wine glass that we had for

13:47

our family, which I recently, like,

13:49

I don't know, four months ago, sent

13:52

to my sister because she has kids. Boy, did I want

13:54

that to end with, which I recently pawned at the pawn

13:56

shop. No,

13:58

she had an interest. if you want

14:00

and I wasn't using the me or anything

14:02

so so so capri of now. Supports

14:05

are these your boss of me? a picture?

14:07

they'll be like you were that mail place

14:09

and shore sailor. Those by both have an

14:11

S. They're nice folks over at always Hello

14:13

my will do that was a for said

14:15

that far. We're over the weekend. had to

14:17

speak in of all of this. We went to

14:20

see Oliver into the on the Roof. Ah now

14:22

if you're Li if you are a platinum

14:24

member you heard Oliver on a bonus episode talking

14:26

about how small his role as he went from

14:29

having the lead in. Midsummer

14:31

Night's Dream to. His

14:34

words on my be in a background extra

14:36

in this. And. But because

14:38

he was asked because it was

14:40

added they they asked for volunteers

14:42

and he saw it as a

14:44

way to continue the joy of

14:46

a hanging out with his friends

14:48

knew at the theater and are

14:50

which he did enjoy and then

14:52

ah now it is showtime They've

14:54

done know the seeds of they

14:57

did Wednesday Thursday. Friday. They've

14:59

done vibes of our ah those not over

15:01

know they hit next weekend as well. Oh

15:03

wow, you're the musical Those two weekends over

15:05

there for quite a run of day. I

15:08

did it the. His high

15:10

school they did they they do and I sat

15:12

with measles man day I was so the who

15:14

two weekends and done. So.

15:16

His is he. He wasn't lying

15:19

to us about how small this

15:21

rollins so. We. Are an

15:23

hour is fifty minutes in act one

15:25

and I turned to Danielle ago as

15:27

he put a long time has seen

15:29

Izzi not in this thing at all

15:31

and as I say that they go

15:33

into the big easy to the closing

15:35

number of act Once which is the

15:37

town getting together for a wedding ah

15:39

if I'm if I'm remembering service said

15:41

I could be forgiven If you don't

15:43

know all the plot point is that

15:45

the sellers of is alon noggin old

15:47

is Ah Oliver and another guy come

15:49

out and does the reader in costumes

15:52

to the hadn't. That's your the

15:54

beard and Oliver's in the

15:56

background. Ah, us. to

15:58

my mean play the clarinet And

16:02

but committing a committing to it but

16:04

be it reminded me of a Muppet

16:06

it reminded me of

16:09

the Cantina scene and you know

16:12

the kid the guy with the closure and

16:15

so it reminded me of that because Oliver like he committed

16:17

to it and he's doing it and I'm

16:19

not gonna lie I was like an

16:22

idiot in school or church where you're not supposed to be

16:24

laughing I got the giggles because it

16:26

just cracked me up that was like first of all

16:28

good for him that he committed to it and be

16:30

he doesn't

16:32

have to be there it's it's

16:34

why why did this

16:37

woman ask for volunteers she's already had a cast of

16:39

50 so but

16:42

Oliver's there and he's having fun with his friends that's

16:44

all that matters and I'll tell you this though it

16:46

was great oh good the show was great some

16:48

of the some of the kids have amazing

16:51

voices one young lady who was not the lead

16:53

although the lead girl had a good voice the

16:58

she had a ready for Broadway voice

17:00

wow girl she was really really good

17:02

awesome and so that was fun that

17:04

was fun cool is there a chance

17:07

that they did like when I was in

17:09

high school we did two weekends but the reason

17:11

why we did two weekends was because they rotated

17:13

the cast no chance they don't

17:15

you don't you know for

17:17

sure yeah I know yeah they're gonna rotate

17:20

I'll bring the play the accordion next week

17:22

no no no no just for the lead

17:24

no no that's not they're not doing that

17:27

I know that sometimes that sometimes they do that that

17:29

is not the case here this is the the

17:32

young man who is the lead is a

17:34

you know the leads are seniors

17:37

for the most part because they're on their way out and

17:39

so they get the biggest role and they're not gonna swap

17:41

them out and the kid did a nice job and

17:44

oddly you know this is a this is a interesting

17:46

the the kid lives right

17:48

in our neighborhood huh lives and he and all

17:50

because he's a year older than Oliver and went

17:52

to a different grade school in Oliver they don't

17:55

really know each other hmm but he's a and

17:57

because it's not when we grew up The

17:59

kids don't play with. The other neighbors just anything

18:01

that happens now. So I'm. Ah,

18:04

But the nother a show together well

18:06

once the lead and v at once

18:08

the fact that would be perfect for

18:10

the clarinet so add i would love

18:12

it if and the last show he

18:14

actually played the clutter you actually play

18:16

and like and actually upstaged everyone was

18:18

so i just want to listen to

18:20

say to of advising where is he

18:22

selling Smith is do things like I

18:24

did to Taylor Swift save with windows

18:26

with terrorists make those that awkward walk

18:28

to the center read ah here's my

18:30

tires by Thomas F. Ah you amazing

18:32

I'm. Great. So I speaking

18:34

of high school performance yes, I just

18:37

a we saw this. I guess there's

18:39

some. L A Area

18:41

awards show for high schools serve

18:43

theater production yes and no of

18:45

our front of a so new

18:47

front of So Adam Fell birth

18:49

name's his son was nominated for

18:51

something also standing out for a

18:53

job. For. Of. Whatever.

18:55

He was in have I don't even remember

18:57

it remember he thought he was talking about

18:59

it when he was here. He was hired

19:01

by was about to go watch the Saudi

19:03

I hear ya that's as of it rang

19:05

a bell when he when he said that

19:07

were you were this word thing I know

19:09

our kids are in the arts and of

19:11

a see saw it because there is a

19:13

kid we know from from though his high

19:15

school who was also nominate. I don't think

19:17

they're up against each other. Maybe somebody from

19:19

Zoe school these nominate yes this weird at

19:21

her side some of these kids visited. There's

19:23

enough bay why why we the did. Adding spices

19:26

don't have to do to worship where we fucking

19:28

thing to have access to so you know they

19:30

only go to give a little years in. Some

19:32

people feel better. It's unfair. Now it it's episodes.

19:34

I know life isn't fair, but it's also unnecessarily.

19:37

i think that probably the thing is most people

19:39

wouldn't even be aware of it unless you are

19:41

nominate i guess so it's maybe they feel like

19:44

it's sort of harmless like it's a nice set

19:46

out to the people and a run of goes

19:48

memory is new to me is the webbys yeah

19:50

they do that no gives a shit you know

19:53

dot nobody know it's nobody brag i mean that's

19:55

the people that nominee again him at his bragged

19:57

that they got to webby when we all know

20:00

that it's all horseshits. Yeah, I would

20:02

have cared about it if we had

20:04

ever won one. That's what we did.

20:06

No, we never submitted ourselves because it's,

20:10

because that's how it works. The Webbies

20:12

aren't purely popularity because anybody can

20:14

vote for the Webbies, right? I

20:16

think any human being who cares.

20:18

But I believe the submission process

20:20

is not the most on

20:23

the up and up. Oh, I don't know how it works.

20:25

I remember years and years ago, we sort of looked into

20:27

it, and then I think we immediately were like, okay,

20:30

I mean. Yeah, and there's another one

20:32

too that's similar to Webbies. The Streamys?

20:34

Yeah. The thing is with

20:36

all these things, they're all kind of a scam

20:39

because, even the Oscars, because you

20:41

have to pay to submit. So

20:43

that's how they make their money. I mean,

20:45

the Oscars, maybe not that, but everything else, they make

20:47

their money because you pay to submit. So if you're

20:49

not, if your production doesn't make enough money to afford

20:51

the $1,000 in some cases, although

20:53

the Webbies, it might be very cheap. But it's

20:56

kind of like, I remember when I was a kid,

20:59

my dad had these volumes that

21:01

was like, who's who in

21:03

business or whatever the fuck. And it's like, you

21:05

pay money to have your name put in a

21:07

book that they send you a copy of. Nobody

21:10

ever looks at it. What is the point of

21:12

this? Such a circle jerk. It's

21:15

ridiculous. I get the email to join that

21:17

every year. As

21:20

a successful podcast, there's certainly do not want to

21:22

be excluded when who's who in business and entertainment.

21:26

It's like, oh, yes, I do. Yeah, so

21:28

that I could go look, I'm in this book.

21:30

It's a crazy, it's a nothing. Yeah. Yeah,

21:34

that said, we want to be inducted

21:36

into the podcast, all the fame. The exact same

21:38

thing we're describing, who cares? But

21:40

unless you're nominated or inducted rather. And then

21:42

it's a very important thing. So to be

21:45

even looked over in that seems

21:47

insane. I also think with

21:49

that, it feels like because

21:51

podcasting is still very new in the grand scheme

21:54

of things, it's only been around like 20 years

21:56

or something. There

21:58

are maybe 25 at the most. It's

22:00

a young thing. So like when

22:02

you imagine like when television was

22:04

this age, people probably didn't take

22:06

the Emmys as seriously as they take it now.

22:09

Or like, you know, the Basketball Hall of Fame

22:11

was probably like, oh, yeah, oh, that was the

22:13

guy that was the first guy who could dribble

22:15

with two hands. Congratulations. But 100 years later, it

22:17

might actually be significant. And so

22:20

if you want to sort of I

22:22

think it is like we do pride

22:24

ourselves on being, you know, whatever,

22:27

you know, early adopters. Pioneers.

22:31

Yeah, that's the word I was reaching for. But

22:34

it's like it would be nice to be included

22:36

on a, you know, a list somewhere of here.

22:38

Here are the shows that were there. Because what's

22:40

going to happen is to your

22:43

point, it's now that podcasting has

22:45

exploded. What's going to happen is

22:47

we are window to have been

22:49

inducted will end. And

22:51

the Jason Bateman's and Conan O'Brien's

22:54

and Office Ladies will start getting inducted. And

22:57

then they can't go backwards from that. Unless

22:59

they do like a lifetime achievement and then nobody knows

23:02

why we showed up for that award. Right.

23:04

Although doesn't the Rock and Roll Hall of

23:06

Fame, they always have a thing where it's

23:08

like, not always, but it

23:10

seems like there's people getting in who are newly

23:12

eligible. And then there's always like, and here are

23:15

the plate spinners. They had the, they were like,

23:17

that's what I was saying about the lifetime achievement.

23:19

I'm covering with that. I didn't know if that

23:21

was considered lifetime achievement or

23:23

it's just kind of all. Well, excellence

23:26

in business, using business or excellence in...

23:28

Right. Yeah, sometimes they give it to

23:30

like a manager or like a guy

23:33

who started a record label. And they

23:35

can backdoor anybody into that. This

23:38

year they're backdoring the unknown Jimmy Buffett into one

23:40

of those. So that's what they do with LL

23:42

Cool J also. They were like, you didn't get

23:44

it on the regular way. And you're his priest.

23:47

Yeah. You just brought him

23:49

in. Yeah, why? Just brought him in, guys.

23:51

Why make it such a like backhanded thing?

23:53

Just have it all be one...

23:55

Well, for Jimmy Buffett, it's because he's dead and

23:57

he can't perform. That's one of the reasons. dead

24:00

and loving it. Dracula. Yeah,

24:04

there's eight nominees this year, eight

24:07

inductees, which is a lot. Oh

24:09

wait, did the final thing come out? Yeah, it came out last

24:11

night. Oh, wow. Yeah. But

24:13

we have to talk about it because we always do. Well,

24:15

the, you know, the draft I do with Joe Cozala over

24:18

there at the, and Chris and Stutter at the Who Gares

24:20

About the Rock Hall podcast, I have,

24:24

I set a record for the most points ever

24:26

in a draft. Oh my God. Because

24:29

I finally went, here's

24:31

the problem with that particular group of people, and I'm

24:33

not putting anybody down by this, I'm the old man

24:35

in the group. And so whenever

24:37

I say, oh, you know what, I'm going to

24:39

go with foreigner, they laugh at me. Yeah.

24:43

And so after years of getting mocked

24:45

by these fucking asshole hipsters who are,

24:47

by the way, who are never fucking

24:50

right. And

24:52

there's like a, so at some point it's like, well, what am

24:54

I, maybe I am the dinosaur here.

24:57

But for years I would go, you know

24:59

what, they're probably right. It probably is going

25:01

to be, you know, I

25:04

can't even think of some of the strokes

25:06

or the, you

25:08

know, some other, some

25:10

other band that isn't as deserving as Foreigner

25:13

or Ozzy Osbourne. And so, Oh,

25:16

you would overthink it. I would overthink it because

25:18

I didn't want to be laughed at. That's

25:21

the truth. And so they would then

25:23

be talking about, you know, names I've never even

25:25

heard of, but I was in the music industry

25:28

talking about, well, it's got to be, you know,

25:30

it's got to be Jake Johnson's year. I mean, I just made

25:32

up a guy that just use a real person's name. You know,

25:34

it's got to be, you know, Paul Simpson's year. I mean, Paul's

25:36

been overlooked for years and I had him go, who the fuck

25:38

is Paul Simpson? And why do they all know it? And why

25:40

do they all think this is a year and why has he

25:42

been overlooked? So that's what ends up happening. So

25:44

last year I went, fuck that. I'm

25:47

doing the people

25:49

that I actually believe should be in and

25:52

I, and it was, it all

25:54

landed where, yes, the Rock Hall agreed, cool. The

25:56

gang should be in. should

26:00

be in, the Dave Matthews Band should be in. I

26:03

did not say foreigner but I discussed foreigner when

26:05

I said, yeah, I'm not going to take foreigner this

26:07

year. I should have taken foreigner this year. They got

26:09

in? They got in. Oh wow.

26:12

Because I would have run the whole fucking thing. That's insane. So I

26:14

took Iron Maiden over foreigner for my fifth pick and

26:17

because I was like, you know what, I think it's going

26:19

to be made over foreigner although I really have a good

26:21

feeling about foreigner. And then I screwed up and didn't get,

26:23

you know. Did someone else say foreigner? No. Oh,

26:25

okay. I'm not going to say foreigner. Because

26:27

they laugh at me when I say foreigner. I didn't know

26:30

like if at the end of the draft, like for their

26:32

last pick, they're like, yeah, I know it's being discussed. When

26:34

they do that, they'll go, you know what, I'm going to

26:36

give a divo. That's what they do for the end of

26:38

the draft sort of for the

26:40

wild card. My wild card was the Osborne.

26:42

Theirs were, you know, not voted in. Right.

26:44

So the one year that I finally went,

26:46

this is going to be, and by the way, that's going

26:48

to be me the rest of the time that I do this

26:51

draft. I'm going to draft the people that I

26:53

believe should be in and not overthink it.

26:56

Go with your gut. Go with my gut. But

26:59

my gut got twisted. We know that. I had a lot

27:01

of stomach issues there for a while. It

27:03

did, yeah. And maybe this draft was the cause of it.

27:05

I think if they stop doing it, your health will improve.

27:07

I think it will. I

27:09

know that one hour will improve. You're going

27:11

to be doing anything else. That I do

27:13

know. I've got to drive all the way

27:15

to Washington. What's it called? Washington? Heights?

27:18

What's that? That's in New York. That's

27:20

not Washington? Not Washington, yeah. I've got to drive all the

27:22

way over there. What? What?

27:24

Should I just go home? With

27:28

your gut? No. I don't want to hear it.

27:30

Might have won. Turn it off. Turn it off. What about

27:33

turn it off? Aren't you hearing? Turn it off.

27:36

I'm not mad at that person that sent that in.

27:38

I'm mad at you. I'm angry at

27:40

you. Passover, of course

27:43

you're mad at me. You saw this. I'm mid-sentence.

27:46

He's already held a fucking lecture on

27:48

Judaism. He gave us our own version

27:50

of Passover dinner with that speech. Boring,

27:52

long. Painful. Painful. And

27:54

he didn't know anything. I didn't even give

27:57

you any food. I didn't know anything. I'm

28:00

mid-rant about Mount

28:03

Washington, I'm not gonna go there, it's the worst hour

28:05

of my year, blah blah blah, and all I see

28:07

over there is, heh, heh, heh, heh, heh, heh, heh.

28:10

Can I press a button, Daddy? Can I press a

28:12

button? Jesus Christ, let me fuckin' riff! That's what I,

28:14

that's fuckin' everybody in this room! That's what I do,

28:16

I riff! I find the funny! And

28:18

I can't find the funny, if you're fuckin' pressin' button,

28:20

he's over there trying to check the fuckin' door, I

28:22

don't know what you're doin' at the end of the

28:25

fuckin' day now! What? Heh,

28:27

heh, heh, heh, heh, heh, heh, heh, heh, heh, heh! See,

28:29

I found the funny, that's an example, you cock suckers!

28:31

Heh, heh, heh, heh, heh, heh! Cock suckers is

28:33

an offensive thing, no it's not, you're fuckin' reading

28:36

into it too much. Oh, heh, heh, heh, heh!

28:38

The emails that we saved you from reading, Gary.

28:40

Oh, God! Yeah, right? Anyone can suck a cock.

28:43

And he, right? Yeah! Hey, by the way, Yeah,

28:45

what's up, dude? I, I don't like

28:47

talking about this guy, I don't think, maybe, maybe never

28:49

come up on this show. Hang on, I, I, my,

28:51

my little, my little act out is, uh, my timer

28:53

fell down. Hahahaha! I don't, maybe I shouldn't even bring

28:55

it up, Oh, you can't, this guy is, Cesar Toon?

28:57

Yeah, fuck it. Alice Jones? But, uh, no. Oh,

29:00

but he, he got heat for saying Hitler was an

29:02

asshole, which I thought was funny. Why did you get

29:04

heat for that from his followers? He was like, he,

29:06

like, hey, uh, just because our current leaders are evil

29:08

doesn't mean this guy was cool. Fuck Hitler, on, on

29:11

his birthday, cause his birthday is $420. Right.

29:13

And everyone was like, you, oh, you got paid

29:15

off by the Jews, did ya? And then, people

29:17

were going crazy. Are you kidding me? Wow! It

29:19

was amazing. I think the one thing we can

29:21

all agree on is Hitler was an asshole. I

29:24

mean, except for Donald. Donald, Donald kinda, he had

29:26

some good ideas. No, people, they love him. Well,

29:28

come on, I mean, I understand white nationalists, I,

29:30

I get that, but I mean, all of Alex Jones's listeners

29:32

are white nationalists. Not all of them, this was just a,

29:34

this was on Twitter or whatever, it was just a bunch

29:36

of replies going, uh, Well, you're not Twittering you. No,

29:39

it was a screenshot of, I said, from,

29:41

uh, on, I was on Reddit, but, uh,

29:43

yeah. Hahahaha! This is amazing. Ahhh.

29:46

And I assume some good people were

29:48

also in the comments. Hahahaha! I

29:50

have to assume some people agreed with him, but, uh,

29:52

what I saw was, uh, you know, just selections of...

29:54

Wow! I'm guessing the good people all got

29:57

downvoted. Hahahaha! Probably. Just

29:59

like he did. That is insanity.

30:01

Yeah. I mean, it's that group

30:03

of folks. Even

30:06

if you're anti-Semitic, Hitler invaded every country

30:08

in Europe and was really bad to

30:10

French people and... That was part of

30:12

it. That was part of it.

30:15

He said this guy, Alex Jones said, this

30:17

guy started a world war and caused millions

30:19

of deaths and people were like, trying

30:22

to fucking facts check that. As

30:26

if Hitler didn't start World War II and as

30:28

if some are like, how many

30:30

times did the allies

30:34

reject attempts that... I was like, what

30:36

the fuck are you talking about? He

30:38

invaded Poland, you ask that. Yeah. Wow.

30:41

Give Poland back. The

30:44

only positive thing he did was bringing in

30:46

that mustache into the world. And

30:48

even that, we got to give Chaplin credit

30:50

for. Yeah. Well, you could give him

30:52

credit for, if you don't like that mustache, you could

30:54

give him credit for making it. Putting it away so

30:57

nobody ever knew it. You know what? I'm not going

30:59

to lie. That's probably what I meant to say. Yeah.

31:02

And I didn't get anywhere near it. Yeah. You

31:04

haven't seen that stash on a person who really civilized society in

31:06

the 85 years. Well, okay. Unless

31:08

there's a child going as Charlie Chaplin for Halloween and even

31:10

they don't understand why they're going as Charlie Chaplin for Halloween.

31:13

Right. Right? The

31:15

kid doesn't want to be Charlie Chaplin ever. The

31:17

little tramp? I could say maybe at a

31:19

certain age, Oliver might have been that kid. I

31:22

think he went on it. But he's gone through phases

31:24

of liking all these times. He went as Marty Balsam.

31:26

That's what I mean. So that

31:29

means he goes into the past and he finds things that he

31:31

likes that most kids don't know exist.

31:33

I think Oliver would have seen that as too

31:35

trite. He would have went... Yeah. I'm

31:38

going Harold Lloyd. He would have

31:40

been Harold Lloyd and then every door. Who

31:43

are you? Who are you? Oh, are

31:46

you an accountant? Oh, you look like a CPA.

31:48

No, I'm Harold Lloyd. Although, Oliver

31:50

would have built like a clock and... Right.

31:53

I've been hanging from it. Which would be a cool concept. You

31:55

know what? I mean, your arms would be super tired. Although

31:57

you... Fake arms. coming

32:00

out of a maybe like use a backpack to hold

32:02

something that'd be a cool yeah that's a cool costume

32:04

for you next year I don't

32:06

need to build a car don't you go to

32:09

parties? what do you do you put on that one thing that

32:11

you've always put on again? I do

32:13

put on the same thing every year because I own

32:15

it now it's the the David S. Pupkins suit because

32:17

it's easy I don't even use

32:19

the tie I just put the jacket and the that's

32:21

another black shirt no I mean with you talking that's

32:23

enough I know you're

32:25

enough I got a short fuse today I will

32:27

stop talking I'm gonna say I do not have

32:30

a short fuse today that fuse was fucking long

32:32

I was kidding that

32:34

fuse took some time to ignite

32:37

I was gonna give you credit for doing all

32:39

that for humor even an

32:42

edge of reality well of course there was a

32:44

touch of reality you got the dancing brows over

32:46

there you know with his nonsense

32:49

bring your old monitor back so I don't have

32:51

to see your face I know that sounds insulting

32:53

because well that monitor raises up it's got it

32:55

he's got a yeah but it's on such a

32:57

name that doesn't matter he could raise it probably

32:59

wouldn't all the way up and I still get

33:01

a clear view yeah it's me that I'm seeing

33:03

yeah you're a your neighbor from home improvement yeah

33:07

uh what uh so you you you're bailing on what you were

33:09

going to talk about yeah we

33:11

ended up on the election so it was just good good good

33:14

the other thing was just another asshole in the

33:16

world that we don't need to all right service

33:18

do saying something ridiculous uh internet and uh somebody

33:21

we know no no no just a

33:23

plural human being okay is

33:26

he in the room I should we shouldn't even circle back

33:28

to it because now everyone's gonna what was he talking about

33:30

let them figure it out it's a guy who I think

33:33

is we all I think are

33:35

familiar with the guy that I think he's in a Hungarian

33:37

prison at this point or Romanian prison that piece of shit

33:39

and oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh I guess

33:42

my brain is not giving it to me he's just

33:44

you might not even know this guy and and if good

33:46

for you if you don't he's just he's just a troll and a

33:49

terrible human being and he said he says stupid shit

33:51

on the internet probably to get the reaction and that's

33:53

why I'm trying not to give it to him I

33:55

say I've done enough yeah I've got a

33:57

long way around too many people subscribe

34:01

to his bullshit yes he's

34:03

one of these like men's rights like oh oh yeah

34:07

he's kind of like an Elon Musk type

34:09

person a Ben Shapiro type sure a Charlie

34:12

Kirk type

34:14

well fuck all those guys right

34:17

yeah good well now you got me should

34:19

I just say what it was without saying

34:21

who it was cuz I think I've already

34:23

they basically this guy funny

34:26

to me you say cuz we were talking about

34:28

cocksuckers he said that kissing a woman is gay

34:30

because women suck dick and so you're kissing the

34:32

lips of the side of it dude wow and

34:34

I don't know but here's the thing I don't

34:36

know if this was a real thing it might

34:38

have been a doctored thing maybe he didn't really

34:40

write that I so I it's like I didn't

34:42

really want to like that's why I kind of

34:44

wanted that step back row or

34:46

walk orchard but it's just way logic oh

34:49

but then I think he also said but

34:51

the only the only woman you can kiss

34:53

is a virgin okay well version could suck

34:55

dick no no no but I think

34:57

that I think he means like someone who actually hasn't

34:59

even sucked a dick well who's

35:02

that right well good luck finding that person

35:05

okay we all get to

35:13

you know we all have a good time we

35:15

all experiment we all splash around right we all have

35:17

a good time and high school college then

35:20

you lock up with somebody in

35:22

the right I just show flappers

35:24

on Saturday yeah

35:26

okay the wonderful

35:34

Wendy Liebman open for me Wendy

35:36

is doing a set on the TV show the

35:39

talk said the material Connell I think

35:41

so the she

35:44

went Wendy interact announced that she had a

35:46

they're having a kindergarten they're having a reunion

35:49

for her kindergarten class but she's

35:51

not gonna go because she's put on like a hundred

35:53

pounds and

35:56

if anybody wants to argue with me that that is

35:58

not a perfect joke I will murder you instead

36:00

of having to argue. That might be the best

36:02

joke ever. It is flawless. It

36:05

made 35 year veteran Jimmy

36:07

Pardo laugh out loud with the blur.

36:09

I was surprised by it. It

36:11

made me laugh. Then I went home and

36:13

told Danielle she laughed. I told you guys,

36:15

you laughed. It's a great, and I did

36:18

it without the great winning delivery. Great

36:20

joke. Yeah, you mangled it. I mangled it.

36:23

It still worked. But

36:25

she did a great job and then

36:27

the two guys, the two guys are

36:30

always there for every Saturday, Kyle and

36:32

Greg. Then Wendy did it

36:34

and then I

36:36

closed it up. Great

36:39

crowd. What a great crowd. We had

36:41

a couple of number one funny fans who were in the room. Some from out of state. Then

36:45

some from the OC, comma, bitch.

36:50

It was nice new folks. One

36:53

woman, I'm not kidding. This is no exaggeration.

36:56

One woman, because

37:00

of the way that the light was hitting me, I could

37:02

see very well to the left of the stage but not

37:04

so hot to the right. She was all

37:06

the way on the left and I could see her crystal clearly. Did

37:10

not laugh at a single thing I said. I'm

37:12

not exaggerating. Not one thing did this woman

37:14

laugh at. The show is over and I

37:16

went into

37:19

the lobby and

37:21

that woman stopped me and talked to

37:23

me for three minutes about how I'm a genius and I may

37:25

be the funniest comedian she's ever seen in her life. I

37:29

did not know how to react to

37:31

it because I thought all of a sudden there

37:34

was a butt coming but I'm

37:36

fucking with you. You were horrible. I

37:38

don't know what was that. Something

37:40

was coming around the corner. It

37:43

was the weirdest because when she stopped me, I'm like, oh

37:45

fuck, here we go. Is she going to

37:47

say, what is she going to say? What

37:49

did I do that she interpreted as

37:51

being offensive? Instead, the complete opposite. That

37:55

was very nice. For

37:58

the second, I told you. the

38:00

story about the guy at the gas station the

38:02

other day who said I was an inspiration to

38:04

him. He's an open miker. A young lady was

38:06

in the green room watching it on

38:08

the screen and I came off

38:10

and she said, I guess the only

38:12

words for you are, you are an inspiration. And

38:15

I'm like, what's going on this week? I don't know. Did

38:18

Danielle send emails around

38:20

the world that Jimmy's

38:22

a little depressed and he needs a little pick me

38:24

up? A little pick me up. It was

38:26

very nice, this young lady. It is suspicious

38:28

that they're using. Stop, stop, stop, stop. The title of

38:31

the Chicago song. Stop, stop, stop. It's

38:33

a little too convenient that it ties into a

38:35

cetera. I know they both use inspiration. I

38:39

would have been tempted if I were you and maybe

38:41

there was no way to do it, but to

38:45

say to that woman who didn't laugh once

38:47

be like, oh, that's so fun. Thank

38:49

you so much for saying that. It's so funny you say that because

38:51

I felt like I kept looking your way

38:53

and then it seemed like you weren't enjoying it. Here's

38:56

the thing. If I was out there selling merch

38:58

or something and I would have had a little more

39:01

time. If you had prepared it. You were ambushed. I

39:03

was ambushed. Yeah. And

39:06

then I saw the guy from out of

39:08

state who was waiting to say hello and

39:10

so on and so forth. So

39:13

I actually went into it. Here's the truth. I went

39:15

in the lobby. I was told by a friend of a show,

39:17

Ted Sullivan, that he and a friend of a show, Chris Regan,

39:19

were going to be there. And so they

39:22

were not outside, which they usually

39:25

wait outside to say hello. They weren't there. And I'm

39:27

like, oh, where are they? And then I went into

39:29

the lobby and they weren't there. And

39:31

so then this

39:33

unhappy woman, this

39:36

non-laughing woman, ambushed me. Do you think like that?

39:38

Is that a thing? I've never heard of it.

39:41

But are there people who just don't they don't

39:43

laugh, but they do enjoy? I

39:45

know one woman. Sounds like a Seinfeld character,

39:47

like a reaction. Oh, you're

39:49

talking about the non-laughter? I

39:52

feel like they did. I think they did.

39:54

He dated a woman who just said that's

39:56

funny instead of laughing. I

39:59

think you're right. Yeah. Which is a well-known

40:01

comedy thing which people talk about but it's usually

40:03

comedians who are doing that No, this woman just

40:05

stared at me and then she You

40:11

see Elaine Boozler's a post over the weekend she got

40:13

arrested at the dog your game yesterday what what? Elaine

40:16

I Encourage you to go watch

40:18

her videos on this she was

40:21

there with her nephew and her nephew son

40:24

and Elaine had a a baseball

40:27

shaped handbag I

40:31

but maybe It's like

40:33

eight inches by eight inches or something. She gave the

40:35

dimensions She did not see

40:37

that you you can only bring

40:39

clear purses into the stadium. Yeah, she had not seen

40:41

that and So as she was

40:43

waiting in line To

40:46

get in with her nephew enough nephew son. They

40:48

stopped her and said you can't come in with

40:50

that It needs to be clear So

40:53

you either need to bring it out to bring it to your car

40:55

or your you know or throw it away And

40:57

she said oh you mean the car that I paid $50 to park a mile away

41:00

No, I'm not gonna do that and I'm not throwing it away And

41:03

then she holds it up because look it's cute. It's baseball

41:05

and then so on and then The

41:09

guy was a dick to her and admittedly she

41:11

got a little lippy and she used the f-word

41:13

at one point Oh, no, and then she said

41:16

well then so then just arrest me and

41:18

they did and they put her No,

41:22

but handcuffs on her behind her back why and

41:24

put her into the into the squad Jesus

41:27

yeah, right and then and

41:30

then they held her for her downtown and booked

41:32

her they did not take her downtown They told

41:34

her that if she just left they wouldn't like

41:36

after hours if she just left they

41:38

wouldn't What did her nephew and the kid do they

41:40

went they oh she said to them? She

41:42

said to the cop the cops or whatever. They

41:44

didn't do anything. Let them go in and enjoy

41:47

the game Yeah, and so they went in

41:49

enjoyed the game and then she was basically held at that You

41:52

know Jail on site whatever they

41:54

call that. Okay, there's a word for there's an expression

41:56

that they use for that Dodger Joe But

42:01

yeah, great. But again, I encourage you to

42:03

watch her video on it because it's interesting.

42:05

She tells it in that Elaine Boosler way

42:07

that she tells a story, which I find

42:09

entertaining. But she also points out, I've sung

42:11

the National Anthem here five times. I played

42:13

in the Hollywood All-Star game several

42:15

times. What else did she

42:18

do? She's done. Yeah, that's

42:20

tough. And fair list to... Yeah, they don't necessarily

42:22

know who she is. And it's tough to just

42:24

play the, do you know who I am card?

42:26

There's never a good way to do that. And

42:29

to a... In fairness

42:31

to this security guard who clearly... Look,

42:34

he's just doing his job. And the job is

42:36

you can't bring that person. Right. Now,

42:40

here's where I'm going to side with that. Elaine, you're

42:42

wrong here. You cannot bring in your handbag. That's the

42:44

rule. I don't care

42:46

how many times you've sung the National Anthem. But

42:48

in fair... What I'm going to say in fairness

42:50

to this guy, in all of this, he's

42:53

probably 27 years old. No

42:56

clue, Elaine Boosler. And that's not an insult

42:59

to Elaine Boosler. No. Elaine

43:01

Boosler was a huge stand-up comedian for a

43:03

window of time that would not include him.

43:06

Before this guy was born, basically. Yeah.

43:08

I also... I don't know if

43:10

this was discussed or mentioned,

43:12

but at BMO Stadium, there's

43:14

a third option, which

43:17

I've had to... Because I took my mom to a

43:19

soccer game and I forgot to tell her that you

43:21

need a clear bag. So she

43:23

got there and she had a backpack. And I was like, ah, shit. And I

43:25

didn't want to go all the way back to the car. They

43:27

have lockers. Love it. I took my

43:29

mom to a soccer game and I forgot to tell her

43:31

that you need a clear bag. So she

43:33

got there and she had a backpack. And I was like,

43:36

ah, shit. And I didn't want to go all the way

43:38

back to the car. They have lockers that

43:40

are basically right there. And you pay,

43:42

I think it's $5 or $10. You get a key. I'm

43:46

dropping $10 before I walk a mile back to

43:48

my car. No shit, man. Yeah. In fact, every

43:51

stadium should have that. Look at the money they

43:53

would be making. And it's just a trailer. It's

43:55

on wheels. They can just pull it up and

43:57

park it there and then you can walk it.

43:59

inside it and pick the one you want. Oh,

44:02

they do that for marathons, at half marathons. Yeah,

44:04

yeah, exactly. Because then they drive that trailer to

44:06

the finish line. To the end, yeah. Yeah, yeah.

44:09

So it's a great solution and they probably make decent

44:11

money because so many people don't know that rule. Well,

44:13

think about it. Let's pretend it's 10 bucks. If

44:16

even 100 people do it, what's

44:19

our math on that? It's a thousand dollars. That's a

44:21

thousand dollars. Oh, that's not worth it. Yeah, and you

44:23

keep it outside the stadium and you like have no

44:25

reentry thing so you don't have people like playing games.

44:27

Oh, yeah. You have to go to the water park

44:30

where you get to keep going back to your locker.

44:32

I have another bad solution but I'm inspired by the

44:34

idea that she was told you either

44:36

go back to your car or you throw it away. Nobody's

44:38

going to throw their bag away. That's

44:40

a ridiculous offer. But

44:42

you could say, well, your other option

44:44

is you can wait here until everybody's going into the

44:47

stadium an hour from now and then we will search

44:49

your bag. So you can go and sit

44:51

for an hour and wait. But that didn't happen. Nobody's going

44:53

to do it. They're not going to let that bag in.

44:55

No, no, they're not. Well, they're not going to let the bag in.

44:57

They're not going to let the bag in but they'll let you have

45:00

your stuff or whatever. The thing is they still do search bags at

45:02

stadiums. Even clear ones? At concerts and stuff, right?

45:05

Like you see it happening, right? I feel like

45:07

that hasn't gone away or am I just transposing?

45:09

You know what they did at Springsteen? Oh, you're

45:11

right. In fact, you and I, they just let

45:13

us walk in. That was the laxist

45:15

security I've seen since 9-11 probably. It

45:19

was 9-10. Yes, it was 9-10. Yeah,

45:23

I was shocked and then I immediately thought, well,

45:25

of course. Like who's the audience? Like there's no

45:27

one. No one's causing trouble here. I don't

45:30

know. I mean, there could be. There's a

45:32

lot of... He's made his, but he's made his politics well known enough

45:34

that I don't think you have to worry about that type

45:36

of person. Or you have to worry about that.

45:38

Oh, they want to come in and disrupt. Oh,

45:40

that's a good point. You never know. Anyway,

45:43

yeah, we literally walked in. Well, it was... There was

45:45

one line for people with bags and one line for

45:47

people who didn't have bags and the line for people

45:49

who didn't have bags was nothing. But so what concerned

45:51

me about that was, and we never talked about this,

45:53

you could have had a gun on you. It

45:56

was a metal. There was no metal detector. It

45:58

was insane. Just walked in. I

46:00

don't have a bag, but I'm packing. Right.

46:03

Yeah. I've got a metal

46:05

pole down my pant leg. Yeah. At

46:08

the time, my reaction to it was

46:10

like, oh, that's nice. But now that

46:12

you've mentioned it, that's actually a little concerning. Yeah.

46:15

It was, we should have at least still gone through the metal detector. Yeah. Maybe

46:18

we were supposed to. It seemed wrong.

46:20

Did you and I fuck something? No. They

46:22

clearly told us to go that way. Yeah. But

46:24

it was very strange. When we went at

46:27

that stage, I thought we would do

46:29

that, then there would be a metal detector later. And

46:33

then there never was. And then there never was. Maybe

46:36

they said, look at these two dorks. They're

46:38

not. They're fine. They're fine. Look

46:41

at these two dads. Yeah. Nothing

46:43

to worry about. Right. Nothing here. He

46:47

did. He had three, I think. What? Thursday,

46:50

Friday, Saturday. Oh, goodness. Yeah.

46:52

Yeah. All

46:55

the show choirs at his school

46:57

had their annual pop show,

46:59

which means they do each

47:03

– there's three choirs. They each do

47:05

their competition set. And then in addition

47:07

to that, there are different numbers performing

47:10

pop songs. And so he

47:12

was part of his choir. They did their

47:14

set, which is like 15 minutes of a

47:17

bunch of different songs and dancing. And

47:19

then he and his – I forget if it's like maybe

47:22

10 or 12 friends – they

47:26

performed What Makes You Beautiful by One

47:28

Direction, which was a delight.

47:31

It was really fun. So

47:33

no solo? No. Well,

47:35

he had – within that, he had a line. Each kid

47:38

kind of stepped up and did one line of it as

47:40

a solo. But yeah, no, he didn't have a solo. He's

47:43

not interested in being the

47:45

center of attention. Does he like being in choir,

47:47

though? Yeah, he loves it. He

47:49

loves it just like I did with theater, although I did want

47:51

to be the center of attention. I'm like him. But

47:54

in the same way that I loved theater as a

47:56

kid because of the social aspect and probably the same way Oliver was

47:58

and you were, he just loved it. being

48:00

with his friends backstage, that's the fun of it.

48:02

And they're having the time of their lives every

48:05

night. Now I have the time of

48:09

the night. And

48:12

hey, I ran into our friend Ben Wise,

48:14

who's Dave Holmes' partner. Yeah. He

48:17

was there because of a college friend of his has a

48:19

daughter at the school. And I was sitting

48:21

right in front of him. It was crazy. So I got to

48:23

sit up. I got to view a block. I just view it.

48:25

I guess apparently Dave was supposed to be there right when he

48:27

was out of town. Oh, what happened to Dave? He had a

48:30

phone. He's in New York promoting

48:32

his new podcast, I think. Oh, because of him.

48:34

Yeah. The MTV podcast that he's doing? I

48:36

believe so, yeah. Did he tell us

48:38

about that on the show or did he tell us about

48:40

that off the air that it was in the making? I

48:42

think, yeah. Either way, we know. But it's happening now. It's

48:44

out. Yeah. Oh, is it out? I

48:47

didn't know if it was actually out. I believe they're on episode three.

48:49

Oh, I gotta check it out. That's right up my alley. I'm

48:51

so far behind on how to survive that if I

48:53

started listening to that, my wife would issue papers. Season

48:57

to fifth. And

48:59

then, yeah, stop listening to Dave Holmes

49:01

and then come back over here. Hey, I told

49:04

you, I promised a report on that Chicago

49:07

concert movie that I went to

49:09

see. Yeah. And what you just said

49:11

made me think about it. So I talked about

49:13

this on the platinum. It was called Chicago

49:15

and Friends. It was filmed in Atlantic City.

49:18

They had, obviously,

49:22

Chris Daughtry and Robin Thicke.

49:25

When you think Chicago, you think

49:27

Daughtry and Robin Thicke. And

49:30

then they also had Steve Vai on

49:32

guitar. Yep. And they

49:34

had, oh, Kingfish on guitar. By

49:37

the way, not for the whole show. They would come out

49:39

for specific songs. Right. And

49:42

then sometimes a couple of songs. So they

49:44

were celebrating the 55th anniversary of

49:46

their first album, CTA. And they

49:48

played songs that they hadn't played in maybe

49:50

50 years. And

49:53

they had these guys sit on. There

49:55

was the woman who, I apologize, Garin told

49:57

us the name last show. I

50:00

even saw the woman sing and she was really good. Anyway,

50:03

I had mentioned there was an acapella

50:06

group in the middle of it and they

50:08

did about four songs, which was more

50:10

than everybody else did. And

50:14

when I told you there were like 12 of

50:16

them, remember I told you that, I was wrong.

50:19

I saw a still photo of it before and

50:21

the still photo included, there's the three guys in

50:23

the horn section of Chicago and

50:25

the two percussionists. They

50:28

accompanied the acapella singers.

50:30

So one could argue, is it acapella? It's

50:33

not really. It wasn't like pentatonics like

50:36

I thought. But they each would stand up

50:38

and if they're

50:41

doing a song, they would each stand up from time to

50:43

time and do a verse or do at least one line.

50:46

And I didn't love

50:48

it. I didn't

50:50

hate it. You mean that part of the whole thing. I

50:53

like the whole thing to be honest with you. My

50:56

big takeaway, here's my big takeaway of it was,

50:58

boy, if they could convince Steve Vai to do

51:00

a tour with them, that would be amazing. If

51:03

it was Chicago featuring Steve Vai,

51:06

it would be because he is

51:08

just phenomenal. He is unlike Tom, I mean,

51:10

not unlike Tom Morello. I wish he played,

51:12

it's a little bit closer, but I wish

51:14

he played music I cared about because he

51:17

is just a phenomenal guitarist. He's

51:20

also now 60 as well,

51:22

however old he is. So he's no

51:24

longer in that wearing shredder garb. He's

51:27

wearing a dress shirt with a vest over

51:29

it and he fits right in and he's

51:31

just a great guitarist and it's like I

51:33

did not want him to leave the stage.

51:36

But the acapella part of it, I'm not going to say

51:38

they weren't good, it just wasn't my cup of tea. But

51:44

I went there thinking that at

51:46

any point I'm just going to go, I get

51:48

it and then go home. So I stayed for the whole

51:50

two hours and 40 minutes and along

51:53

with the other five people in the movie theater, here's

51:56

where they sat. Can I tell you where the other people

51:58

sat? Right next to you. No. They sat

52:00

there's the three rows right in front of the

52:02

stage then there's an aisle then there's that first

52:04

row that starts the stadium Seating yep, they

52:07

all sat there. They didn't know each other Wow,

52:10

it went one space space

52:13

one space three three three one

52:15

more So possibly three

52:17

knew each other. Yeah, but of the five

52:19

they were three certain certainly three different groups

52:22

They all sat there. I had the rest of

52:24

the theater to myself Like

52:26

I could have I could have run up and down

52:28

rows two through seven right just back and forth running

52:30

Well, you shouldn't do that with your knee. Not with

52:32

my knee. No, no, that's a tight squeeze. Yeah We

52:36

know you have trouble in theaters It's

52:40

either that fall. Yeah, or

52:42

when Tom Lebange Tackled

52:45

me and we dropped four feet to the

52:47

ground I'm gonna put it on that and

52:49

don't forget the who cares about the rock

52:51

all podcast That was clearly a factor in

52:53

just emotionally. They're one hour. Yes, the one

52:55

hour of stress. Why won't these young people

52:57

like me? Just

53:00

going back real quick. Yeah, the choir show

53:02

is for a day not

53:04

Charlie's choir, but the all-girl

53:08

Seventh-grade choir, I guess it was they

53:10

did a set that was I

53:13

Mean it was close to

53:15

being Matt Belknap Nirvana. They

53:17

sang helpless from Hamilton

53:21

Then they sang you were meant for me by Taylor

53:23

Swift and then this is this isn't I don't know

53:25

I can't remember if they were in the row But

53:27

the last two songs were Taylor Swift into forever your

53:29

girl by Paul have oh my god That's how it

53:32

ended. I was like I've never

53:34

enjoyed anything more than this Thing

53:36

their own son was in the show They

53:39

definitely they stole his thunder Wow

53:41

It was incredible and they did a

53:43

great job with it too, but I was like I I'm in

53:45

heaven with these are what 12 year olds Yeah,

53:48

12 13 I guess Wow. Yeah, that's

53:51

great. It was it was amazing. Oh

53:53

their first song That's where I think

53:56

the first song was Carol King or something. I was like, I don't

53:58

care about this one And

54:00

they got a lot of good songs and then they

54:02

did a standard that was I Didn't

54:05

familiar with it. It sounded nice. That

54:08

was baka Pala, but Yeah,

54:11

oh man, but do you don't you don't expect

54:13

Paul? I know you don't and when it's really not that

54:16

song when it happens bam It's a

54:18

great. Oh, you know remember a guest of art was

54:20

it? Alyssa maybe asked me what my favorite Paul Abdul

54:22

song was and I couldn't think of one that one

54:24

it might be for a real It's one of the

54:26

best. Yeah, she's got a lot of

54:28

good songs. She got that greatest hits Oh, you're welcome to listen to

54:30

that anytime. I have not done

54:32

that. You're welcome to anytime. I guess I

54:34

could do that Yeah, I'd prefer

54:36

to just live with the memories. I have listening

54:38

to her when I was 15. You're not listening

54:41

to the full album Not

54:43

anymore when I was a kid I did sure. Yeah, I

54:45

don't think I've even I don't even know what her third

54:47

album Was I just this first two, you know is forever

54:49

your girl and then? Rush

54:51

rush. What was the name of the album though? Don't tell me

54:54

don't tell me The

54:56

the single was rush rush, but the

54:58

album was called. I won't

55:00

be able to pull it. It's like It's

55:03

something like sparkly. It's like one

55:05

word. It's like Star

55:07

later. It's something to do with something like that.

55:09

I'm close. I'm like, do you know it Karen

55:11

unless I'm wrong? I know it.

55:13

Well, what do you think it is? Isn't it

55:15

vibology? No, that's a single. I

55:18

thought that was Is that the name of the

55:20

album? Karen from me wasn't there

55:22

had a smug look on it Right,

55:25

but wait, but you're right. It's something like

55:27

that you Bruce. Maybe it is that no,

55:29

that's not a crazy name for an album

55:31

It's not a biology. Well, I

55:34

would remember that was a that was a song that was definitely a

55:36

song on that album Yeah, yeah, there was cuz that came out what

55:38

89 91. I can only apologize It

55:43

came out that came out and I think I think the first one came

55:45

out in 89 the second one came out in like 91 Maybe

55:47

yeah, so bellbound spellbound you were you were

55:49

yeah, I was But

55:51

the sparkly sting layer whatever

55:53

you were saying. Yeah, I was

55:55

gonna jump right in. Yeah, yeah,

55:57

I biology idiot I

56:02

saw the face, Garin. I saw what you were getting

56:04

at. I'm sorry. But I don't even think that was

56:06

the name of a song on it, right? There was

56:08

no song called... Called Spellbound? Spellbound. Maybe I'm wrong. That's

56:10

right. I remember, you know... There is a

56:12

song called Spellbound. Oh, there is. Okay. I remember Promise of a

56:14

New Day, Rush Rush, of course,

56:16

aforementioned by Biology. Of course. Of course. And

56:19

then a song that I did like that Elise made fun

56:21

of me for liking, which is a song called Will You

56:24

Marry Me Boy? Which maybe one of them... at the time

56:26

was just as it fed into my twisted

56:29

fantasies. That was one of my faves. Of

56:31

course. Yeah. I don't think

56:33

you were actually making fun of you for that. You were all allowed

56:35

to like different things. It's like ridiculous.

56:38

You know what I recommend? You go home, step on your

56:41

other toe. That's what I

56:43

recommend you do. Ah, she's finally in regular shoes

56:45

again. Oh, yeah? Because for a while she was

56:47

wearing no shoes. Yeah, she's

56:49

been traipsing around the house very loud. Now,

56:51

yeah, she broke her toe and had to

56:53

wear one of those things. It's not a

56:55

full boot, but it like keeps the toe

56:58

from bending. And as she answered my

57:00

wife on Facebook, she broke her

57:02

toe doing what, Matt? I

57:06

don't know how she put it, but she kicked a

57:08

wall. I believe it was

57:10

dusting. Oh, yeah. Yes. She was cleaning and

57:13

of course then was like, this is what happens

57:15

when you have to clean. Which

57:17

is how I would have reacted to it. But yeah, she like

57:19

stubbed her toe on the corner of a wall. We've all done

57:21

it. We've all done it. All

57:24

right. Let's take a break. Laura House is here. Before

57:27

we take a break, I wanted to say that a friend

57:29

of the show, Steve Mermel, I believe on this very show,

57:31

he announced that he was going to be sending me some pizzas.

57:33

Remember that? Yeah, I thought he was going to send me some

57:36

from his favorite pizza place. Well, they

57:38

arrived. Oh, boy. And

57:40

they are deep dish, which I was not expecting. And you know,

57:42

I'm not a fan of deep dish. And

57:46

we have one last night. Delicious. Absolutely delicious.

57:48

I forget the name of the place. It begins with a

57:50

P. But I

57:52

think Steve Mermel for the delicious pizza. Pizza, pizza, pizza.

57:55

That was it. That was it. It was a little Caesar. I think it was

57:57

a P. It was Pizza Hut.

58:00

Yeah, oh am I getting that right that is

58:02

a great little place That's

58:05

that better. We had a freeze-ride from Chicago They're

58:09

local they well no no the show I went you're different

58:13

Anyways delicious, and I think Steve on the air for setting

58:15

the pizzas all right. Let's take a break. We

58:17

come back We got Albers trivia With Laura

58:19

house, so I just did a show with not that long

58:21

ago And she's always a light

58:23

to have on the on the program and we'll talk about

58:25

that Oh very quickly as well because we mentioned this on

58:27

the the platinum episode I'm not sure if

58:30

we mentioned it on the regular one. We have a new

58:32

store up at tea public Yeah, the link is

58:34

on the website Garron also tweeted it out Show

58:38

notes look in our show notes in the show notes

58:40

of the episode. It's Instagram. Yeah, I go over to

58:42

tea public I believe the there's a sale going on.

58:44

I don't know how long that lasts by the time

58:46

this might be over It might be over by the

58:49

time this But I

58:51

think a new one will kick in eventually if tea

58:53

public historically there are there there may be another sale

58:55

in the future Yeah, but right now. It's a good

58:57

one. Yeah, but I think yeah, I think it's sadly

59:00

one of your times I've had these folks here, but

59:03

right now there are six designs up

59:05

there And we'll be adding more as time

59:07

goes on but these are some of the most popular

59:09

designs and so that's where you can get that shirt

59:12

a phone case Woody

59:14

whatever you like I think you need a little purse

59:16

that they won't let you bring into Dodger Stadium Pick

59:20

your color to like yeah Part

59:22

of it is if you wanted if you always wanted

59:25

like a red never not funny shirt We're not gonna

59:27

make it cuz of course we hate Donald Trump But

59:29

you want a red shirt that has a number on

59:32

a logo on it You can go get that and

59:34

is this fair to say that the items and colors

59:36

are personally curated by Jimmy part Oh, they're not they

59:38

are they are they are at the Tea

59:42

public recommends these colors for this design very good, and

59:44

I was like who am I to fight with tea

59:46

public? Well, so you click the button and said yes

59:48

to those though, right? I I

59:51

said yes in fact for one of them I

59:53

did add a color that it excluded because I

59:55

did like a color look I'm not great at

59:57

sales Jimmy, but I'm still gonna say personally curated.

59:59

Yeah part of it. Well, see I

1:00:01

went the other way going, what if they don't like

1:00:03

the colors? They'd be mad at me. So I went

1:00:05

that way, you know, for Passover. We'll

1:00:08

be back. Hey, we're

1:00:10

very lucky here at Never Not Funny. They have

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be a headhunter, right? No, a headhunter helps people

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a lot of people are saying they're a little tight

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with the wallet these days. Luckily enough, they're never funny

1:01:37

listeners. These people are flush. But

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sometimes some things come up, unexpected

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auto bill, in my case I had an unexpected

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dental bill. My

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dental insurance is okay but at the same time it's

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not the greatest and you get something done, you got

1:01:52

to pay out of pocket. What about this? Maybe you

1:01:54

have a pet and suddenly your pet gets sick, you

1:01:56

take him to the vet, oh my God, this is

1:01:58

going to be thousands of dollars for you. this

1:02:00

whatever the problem is and that's very unexpected

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and very unwelcome. Well that's where Earn-In comes

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FDIC. Earn-In get your money

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now. Hey

1:03:03

everybody welcome back into the program. Yeah welcome back in.

1:03:06

Welcome back into the program. Welcome back

1:03:08

in like hey come back into the pool. That

1:03:10

sort of thing. We're in the pool. We're splashing

1:03:12

around in here. We welcome you in to episode

1:03:14

3409 of the award winning podcast never not funny.

1:03:17

When I was telling this story about flappers we'll bring our

1:03:19

guest in here in two seconds and

1:03:21

I mentioned that there were some folks in from out of town

1:03:23

in the OC. Jake from Montana and

1:03:25

David from the OC. It

1:03:29

feels like I gave him blue balls but oh he kind of

1:03:31

sort of mentioned me. I think if a

1:03:33

guy comes in from Montana maybe you mentioned that

1:03:36

guy's name. Shout him out. Right give him a

1:03:38

little something. Shout it out loud. Kiss style. And

1:03:40

then David of course David Goddard who was

1:03:42

in the never not funny fantasy baseball league. So

1:03:45

David was at the show got a little attention and I think

1:03:47

that made him then go you know what a bunch of these

1:03:49

good side I'll send him a shitty trade offer. I

1:03:51

think that's what happened. He thought

1:03:53

he could take advantage of me. Oh thanks for coming.

1:03:55

You know what he's riding the high. Maybe he won't

1:03:57

know how bad of a trade offer this is. He

1:04:01

always offers horrible trades. This was one of the worst of

1:04:03

all time. So do you think he was just trying to

1:04:05

butter you up at the show saying good show? Yeah.

1:04:09

Just to try to get this trade through. David

1:04:11

also was... So he didn't like your show at all. He

1:04:13

probably hated it. I would have if I were

1:04:15

him. He's heard it all

1:04:17

before. He

1:04:20

kept his sunglasses on the back of his crew

1:04:23

neck t-shirt. Right here? At

1:04:25

the show? Yeah. Sitting down at

1:04:27

a comedy show? Sitting down in the front row. Sitting at an

1:04:29

evening show. He had his

1:04:31

sunglasses on the back

1:04:33

of his shirt. So like if you were sitting behind him, you saw

1:04:36

his sunglasses. And I made fun

1:04:38

of him every time I read

1:04:40

reference to him. How the sunglasses are doing? They still doing okay

1:04:42

back then? What do you think about the people behind you? They

1:04:44

get a good view. Right? Making sure that your

1:04:46

shirt doesn't get blinded? Right? That's a...

1:04:49

Wait, who's that? Boat people? Is that

1:04:51

who does that? Boat people? That's a beachy

1:04:53

thing, right? It's a beachy thing. Kind of a...

1:04:56

Yeah. In the 80s. It

1:04:58

was a past... I should tell you, this guy's in

1:05:00

his 80s. Fair? All right, anything in

1:05:02

that? I just don't understand it. It's night time. And

1:05:05

almost... But no, when he arrived... No, no,

1:05:07

think about it. It wasn't... What did you get

1:05:09

there? Think about when you left IKEA. Yeah. It

1:05:12

was bright and sunny. You had to put your sunglasses on. But

1:05:14

you pull into the underground lot at that park. I don't know

1:05:16

where he parked. He probably parked over at Ashley Furniture, like they

1:05:18

tell you to do. Okay. I was going

1:05:20

to say. Hey, park at Ashley Furniture. No. When

1:05:23

you come to our club, park there. Yeah. Like...

1:05:25

Pick up an end table. This is even right. No,

1:05:28

it is a very weird... Because they're also like... They gave us

1:05:30

permission. Don't worry about it. Okay. Well,

1:05:33

okay. What was that conversation? Yeah, exactly. Do you mind if we

1:05:35

send our people over here? Oh, are they going to come in

1:05:37

and buy something? Probably not. Because they're

1:05:39

here when you guys close. Yeah. But

1:05:42

don't worry. They will cross the two most annoying

1:05:44

intersections in Burbank to get here. Oh, gosh. It's

1:05:47

just a treacherous path. That

1:05:50

voice is the voice of Laura House. She's been here

1:05:52

before. We adore Laura House. We love when she joins

1:05:54

us. I had the pleasure of spending some time with

1:05:56

Laura House. Two shows recently, Laura and Elle. Yes.

1:06:00

was on Pop Cultured, did

1:06:02

a great job with it with Owen Smith

1:06:04

and Andy Richter. Andy Richter

1:06:06

of course, the great Andy Richter, that was a

1:06:08

great panel. And then prior

1:06:11

to that, a couple weeks before that, I did your

1:06:13

show out at the Crow. At the Crow. That's why,

1:06:15

remember I called the Black Crow or the Dead Crow,

1:06:17

I kept calling it the Crow. You did. The Black

1:06:19

Crow. That's why I called it the Crow because her

1:06:21

place is called the Crow. Yeah. There was a Dead

1:06:23

Crow in South Carolina, is that where it was? I

1:06:26

think it's North Carolina. It's in one of the Carolinas.

1:06:28

Yeah. And I just saw the Black Crows at

1:06:30

the Greek. You did. About a week ago, so

1:06:33

I don't think it means anything. Do

1:06:36

you know Brendan Smith? Yes. Did

1:06:39

you see him at the Black Crow show? He was there

1:06:41

with our... Was he trying to get on stage? Seems like

1:06:43

a Brendan Smith thing. They'd be

1:06:45

like, let me join in for this one. Yes, that's it. I

1:06:47

promise I'll make it rock. Yeah, and he will make

1:06:49

it rock. No, he'll make it rock. Yeah. No question.

1:06:51

He loved that show. He won't stop talking about it.

1:06:53

Really? Yeah, you didn't care for it. I liked it.

1:06:56

You're not a big Black Crows fan. I'm a... I

1:06:59

became a fan. It was one of those... My friend

1:07:01

was like, hey, do you want to go? My

1:07:04

husband ended up being out of town,

1:07:06

so I was just surrogate husband. And

1:07:09

then I just say yes. So you

1:07:11

won. I say yes. Yeah, I went. It was really

1:07:14

nice. It was one of those where you go,

1:07:16

don't they... Where you know the band enough to

1:07:18

go, don't they do the one about lighting your

1:07:20

candle? No. I

1:07:22

don't think they do. No, they do. They do. Free little

1:07:25

thing, let me light your candle. I mean, it's a metaphor.

1:07:28

I think it's a sexual thing. You're the only classic. It means

1:07:30

a sexual. Yeah. Yeah. But no, they

1:07:32

were great. They were fantastic. That is a tricky

1:07:34

thing when you're only like a little like you.

1:07:36

Like, I don't dislike them, but I don't know

1:07:38

more than four songs. Yes, I certainly played it

1:07:41

up on the yes. Totally.

1:07:43

And I was like, I'll do some Googling. Yeah,

1:07:45

like I probably know as much as you and

1:07:47

I don't think I would get anything out of

1:07:49

that concert. But it was fun. The

1:07:52

singer... Also, you learn like they're...

1:07:54

So you don't know them at all. So this will

1:07:56

be news to you. News to me, which anyone

1:07:59

listening would be like... This is so embarrassing. She should not

1:08:01

be so old. Oh, wait. Is

1:08:03

this about Kate Hudson? No, it wasn't even that. It

1:08:06

was just I didn't know it was like Brothers and they stopped talking.

1:08:08

Oh, they had this bad. They wouldn't talk

1:08:10

for years and it had to do with

1:08:12

owning the rights of it. And

1:08:14

then the, yeah, I didn't know the singer had been like married

1:08:17

to Kate Hudson and had a whole thing. So,

1:08:19

but he, no, he was super dynamic and fun. So

1:08:21

what happened? They got the Brothers, worked it out? You

1:08:24

know, I was asked that several times if

1:08:27

I could tell what was happening from my

1:08:29

seat and I could not. So we didn't

1:08:31

know if it landed as, look,

1:08:33

who cares? Let's get it together and tour

1:08:36

and just deal with each other

1:08:38

and rake in some money. Or if

1:08:40

it was, you know, hey, we amends

1:08:42

and we're brothers again. I do know the guitar

1:08:45

playing brother said something to

1:08:47

the singing brother and he did he

1:08:50

made a dismissive face. He made it. He

1:08:52

made a like, I'm kind of working.

1:08:55

I'm working right now. And he's like, which

1:08:58

I imagine the guitars like I too am

1:09:00

working, but I obviously felt it was in

1:09:02

anyway. So I think it's money. Maybe it's

1:09:04

still a little tension. Maybe it's still open.

1:09:06

I think it's a, hey, if we, if

1:09:08

we tour solo, we do a Largo and

1:09:10

if we come here together, we can do the Greek

1:09:13

and then they're going to, they're on tour with Aerosmith

1:09:15

at the end of the year. Oh,

1:09:17

is that true? Yeah. Oh, they

1:09:19

were on the Aerosmith tour last year when they canceled it. And

1:09:22

I think that was one of the reasons too, like that they wanted to get

1:09:24

back together was to be part of that. Oh,

1:09:27

Aerosmith tour. Yeah. That

1:09:29

makes sense. I'm picking this all up from like Eddie

1:09:31

Trunk conversations. I don't really, I hear

1:09:33

bits and pieces. I don't care enough about

1:09:35

the black crows to listen with

1:09:37

both of my ears. I know you had trouble hearing.

1:09:39

Oh, I think I got a cute t-shirt. You got

1:09:41

to show you guys. I had a fun night with

1:09:43

my friend. You know, that was, that was my

1:09:46

day. He was like up and dancing.

1:09:48

This is a, I might as well, she would love

1:09:50

to be mentioned. Who is Morgan

1:09:52

Walsh? And

1:09:54

she's- Sure, we know Morgan. Yeah. So

1:09:57

I filled in for Matt Walsh, one of the UCB. founding

1:10:00

fathers? We don't believe it. Friend of the show,

1:10:02

Matt Walsh. Come on. Sure. I

1:10:05

started comedy with Matt Walsh. Matt Walsh. What a

1:10:07

delight. So anyway, he was traveling and I was like, I'll be Matt Walsh.

1:10:09

Right. Yeah. That

1:10:12

was nice. I have, but speaking of people, singers

1:10:16

mad at each other who in possibly

1:10:18

our opinion shouldn't be, there

1:10:20

was a moment in doing pop cultured

1:10:22

that I regret. Do

1:10:24

you hear this a lot? Do you have

1:10:27

past contestants going, if I could do over,

1:10:29

it would be a lot. I don't know. If

1:10:31

they do, they don't tell me, you know, they

1:10:33

don't come to the host of the show. Are

1:10:35

you saying this is, I should follow? I

1:10:38

have to know what this is now. So

1:10:41

you ask, what's the saddest thing you can

1:10:43

think of was a question,

1:10:45

which is a great question in a comedy

1:10:47

game show, because do you go, well obviously

1:10:49

the Ukraine situation, like do

1:10:52

you really dig in with Israel? Like

1:10:54

what do you, but you go, oh,

1:10:56

comedy, I don't know. But also my

1:10:58

mind was totally blank other than something

1:11:00

just sad that happened to me. I had a breakup

1:11:03

years ago. All I could think of

1:11:05

was the most selfish, the narcissist. Well

1:11:08

something sad happened to me once and I'm going to

1:11:10

mention, anyway, if I

1:11:12

had to do over, I would say haul

1:11:14

and oats suing each other. You think that would be it?

1:11:17

Yeah. That's a good comedy

1:11:19

answer and also has a ring of truth

1:11:21

to it. Bad, right? Bad, I felt like,

1:11:23

oh, that would be the truth. I

1:11:25

don't know, it didn't land that big here except with Matt,

1:11:28

but I still, I think I could have made it

1:11:30

work with that audience. You would have told me. I think

1:11:32

I would have made it. Do you think breakup was better?

1:11:34

I don't think it was good. I think, now let me

1:11:36

ask you a question, because as the host of the program,

1:11:38

I don't know the answer to this. There

1:11:40

are some games that you are given the information in

1:11:42

advance because you have to prepare for. There are some

1:11:44

games that are sprung on you and you have to

1:11:46

improvise and answer on the spot. That

1:11:48

was one that was sprung. It was sprung. It

1:11:51

was sprung. And in the moment,

1:11:53

like I have that thing, I'm sure a lot of

1:11:55

people do. I didn't invent the human condition. When I

1:11:57

feel good, I felt good and I was enjoying the

1:11:59

show. I couldn't think of anything

1:12:01

sad. I was like nothing sad comes

1:12:03

to mind. I'm having a great time. What did Owen

1:12:05

say? He doesn't talk to his dad? I

1:12:08

feel like the other two had like my dad

1:12:10

never loved me kind of thing. So I mean

1:12:12

we all went personal. I think Andy actually said

1:12:14

podcasting. Oh yeah, no he did.

1:12:17

Yes, you're right. What's the saddest thing you can think

1:12:19

of when you've been podcasting? That's

1:12:22

true. No matter what I said, you're not going to

1:12:25

beat that. It was a

1:12:27

perfect joke answer. Perfect joke answer.

1:12:31

And then Owen did say I don't talk to

1:12:33

my dad. So then it was like you were

1:12:35

third and it was like really you, there

1:12:38

was no way to top the perfect joke

1:12:40

answer. And the saddest thing you

1:12:42

could think of. That's true. And a great memory that

1:12:44

you have. I could be wrong about that. No,

1:12:47

I believe that is exactly what happened. So

1:12:49

pressure's off. There was nothing.

1:12:53

We also did a show since you did. We did

1:12:55

a pop culture since your show. So I

1:12:58

forget the last one as soon as it's over.

1:13:00

I forget them. But you remember the order of

1:13:02

this one. I remember when it's funny and

1:13:04

then it falls off a cliff with the third answer. It

1:13:06

was a landing. It was a strong landing podcasting. You

1:13:13

did a great job. There was a great show. The people enjoyed

1:13:15

it. That's all that matters. We are now,

1:13:17

by the way, I forgot to mention on this show, I

1:13:19

believe, we are now streaming when we do pop culture. In

1:13:21

the past it was through No More Comedy and I

1:13:24

will now say the quality on that video

1:13:26

was not great. Oh really? They

1:13:28

now do it through the UCB where

1:13:30

it's a multi-camera stream and it looks

1:13:33

great. It looks great. It

1:13:35

looks great. Sounds great. Sounds great.

1:13:37

And it's 10 bucks. And it's only going to get better.

1:13:39

And so if you cannot make that show, if you are

1:13:41

a fan of mine or you're a fan of that show

1:13:44

or you're a fan of somebody on the panel and you're

1:13:46

at home on a Saturday with nothing to do, for 10

1:13:48

bucks, it will entertain you

1:13:50

because it's now worth watching at home.

1:13:52

I don't want to oversell it, but

1:13:55

UCB has put in the effort necessary

1:13:57

to do this correctly. in

1:14:00

the past and you're like, I don't want to do that again. Have you heard

1:14:02

people watch one of these? Yes,

1:14:05

absolutely. Because

1:14:08

it looks great and the way I look on it, no, but that's not

1:14:10

the camera's fault. I don't

1:14:12

blame the UCB for that. I don't

1:14:14

blame the mounted cameras. Do you blame

1:14:16

Father Time? I blame Father Time and

1:14:18

of course? Society. Society.

1:14:21

Oh, fair. Now Laura, I alluded to the crow then we

1:14:23

got distracted by the year. I'm going to say four out

1:14:26

of a scale of one to 10 interesting story about the black ones.

1:14:29

Right? You haven't seen

1:14:31

the shirt though. It's very cute. I heard it's cute.

1:14:33

No, it's super cute. Was there an opening act on

1:14:35

that? Yeah, but

1:14:38

it... You don't remember the outfit? Yeah. All

1:14:41

right. You do a show at the crow out

1:14:43

in Santa Monica, which is a small little

1:14:45

venue and I don't mean that in the

1:14:47

majority. 75C'd. 75C'd, which

1:14:49

to me is the perfect size to

1:14:51

do comedy because you're communicating, not performing.

1:14:55

It's kind of a tough way to put it. I think that's how

1:14:57

it is. I like that. Do you ever lecture about comedy? I

1:14:59

like your input. I'm the show on a weekly

1:15:01

basis. Oh, it's very, very funny. Some would argue that I've

1:15:03

never said anything funny. I've been lecturing for 18 years on

1:15:05

the program. I would not be

1:15:07

one of those people. I love the venue. I will

1:15:10

do any show that I get invited to do over there

1:15:12

again because of the size of the venue. I've not

1:15:14

been invited back on a second time. Oh,

1:15:17

it's recent. Seems like I'm a one

1:15:19

and done. There's a lot of shows over there. I

1:15:22

see Laura House. She's at the crow every night. She's doing

1:15:24

something different. Now I'm on this person's job. I'm on this

1:15:26

person's job. I've done one. I wasn't invited

1:15:28

to do the group photo afterward. I was

1:15:31

not asked if it was second show by anybody in the

1:15:33

audience. Sounds like they didn't care for you. Wow. I

1:15:36

destroyed. They were lucky to have heard me. That's

1:15:38

very true. I very rarely say I had a great set.

1:15:41

That was a great set. It was a great set. It

1:15:43

was a super fun show. I was asked by somebody

1:15:45

if I slept with them in Kansas City. At

1:15:47

that show? Yeah. What?

1:15:50

I'm not 100% sure if she was kidding or was

1:15:52

seriously asking. Wow. Are

1:15:55

you 100% sure of your answer? No. That's

1:16:00

the bigger question. I am not. If she

1:16:02

would have said you and I slept together in

1:16:04

the 90s in Kansas City, I would have

1:16:06

went, okay. Were you that guy? What do

1:16:09

you mean by that? Were you that guy on the

1:16:11

road? Well, there's some comics are just that guy.

1:16:13

Some comics are like, absolutely not. I care about

1:16:15

hygiene. And then some guys are like, no, no, why

1:16:17

do you think I got into comedy? That was not why I

1:16:19

got into comedy, but I certainly enjoyed that that was

1:16:21

one of the perks of comedy. Yeah, there you go.

1:16:23

I did enjoy that you did free drinks. I could

1:16:25

go to Kansas City and feel like a rock star.

1:16:27

There you go. Yeah, Kansas. Yeah. I

1:16:31

was from Chicago. So

1:16:33

if I was doing a one-nighter in Portsmouth,

1:16:35

Ohio, I was a fucking celebrity. Sure. And,

1:16:39

you know, yes, I also didn't

1:16:42

get in high school. I didn't

1:16:44

get that attention. I got it at the record store, but I

1:16:46

did not get it in high school.

1:16:48

So this was, you know

1:16:50

what? Yeah, I would

1:16:52

think that would be hard to not do, but I

1:16:54

just some guys are

1:16:56

there's a spectrum of. Yeah. I

1:16:59

was under those guys. I wasn't. Because

1:17:01

you're such a family man. Now I just wonder

1:17:03

if you were like, but you had those days

1:17:06

that make I had my you had a full

1:17:08

life. My load by early twenties. Yeah, where that

1:17:10

seems like what you should be doing. I

1:17:12

did. I did too as a lady and

1:17:14

it was my early twenties, mid twenties,

1:17:17

late twenties into my. Oh, she's it a lot early

1:17:19

to mid thirties. Yeah, it was not awesome.

1:17:22

Okay. I

1:17:24

got sober at thirty seven. You always like a lot like

1:17:26

black white. Yeah. That

1:17:29

helps. That helps the sleeping around the drinking. Oh, when

1:17:31

you stop the drinking, turns out there's a lot of

1:17:34

activities. I'd rather just go to a movie or go

1:17:36

back to the hotel. Oh, no, quite.

1:17:38

It's very I the

1:17:40

intensity with which

1:17:43

I need to make out with a person when

1:17:45

I'm drinking it like

1:17:47

the compulsivity of

1:17:49

needing to put a mouth on my

1:17:51

mouth when I have a drink is so

1:17:54

incredible. And at this point, I'm like,

1:17:57

absolutely not. Do even if I am

1:17:59

in. love with you and we've been

1:18:01

engaged for years. I'm not even sure if I want to

1:18:03

know. I'm just kidding. No, you're not.

1:18:06

No, like his mouth on my mouth. But otherwise I'm

1:18:08

just like. He plays a horn. It's filthy mouth. Yeah,

1:18:10

no, that's a very weird trumpet mouth. But you know

1:18:12

what? I like him. He makes up for it in

1:18:14

so many ways. So he's a good dude. Does he

1:18:17

play taps at the end of every

1:18:19

evening? Yes. Great. What a

1:18:21

sound to go to bed. Pulls that up. He

1:18:23

knows that's how I know. I'm just playing a

1:18:25

baby game on my computer and Netflix is on

1:18:27

and he's like. Oh, it's over? Right. Wrap it

1:18:30

up. And the dog knows too. She hops up.

1:18:32

She's like, oh, my guess. She's like, I got to

1:18:34

go in the yard and then hit the bed. That's

1:18:36

the perk of marrying a horn player. One of the

1:18:38

many. But to your point, Laura,

1:18:40

there are many a gentleman

1:18:43

that did get into comedy for that. Oh,

1:18:45

sure. And we know. I noticed that as well. We know

1:18:47

a lot of comics that like they will brag to you

1:18:49

like about how many people they stumbled on the road and

1:18:51

like, well, how are your shows? Then

1:18:54

like, oh, good enough for that. That's

1:18:56

why you're not funny. Yeah. But

1:18:59

still not funny. Yeah, there's there's that. I remember

1:19:01

a comic who

1:19:04

wasn't exactly like that explaining

1:19:06

a guy who was

1:19:08

very much like that. And he just he

1:19:10

was like with the because the

1:19:13

guys almost never comment on the

1:19:16

quality. So that was my

1:19:18

friend's takedown of that guy specifically was

1:19:20

like, well, it's a little quantity

1:19:23

over quality with the you know, because

1:19:25

because that was never in the brag. You know,

1:19:27

it's like I've been with so many women. It's like,

1:19:29

well, but I mean, right, you know,

1:19:31

women having their their worst moment, I think,

1:19:33

you know, a lot of women. Yeah,

1:19:39

not necessarily a brag. Yeah, yeah, exactly. I

1:19:41

was so many women's mistake. Yeah. When yeah,

1:19:43

when you when you break it down. And

1:19:45

that was my experience, too, of like,

1:19:47

I thought I was so fun. And

1:19:50

a few months into

1:19:52

being sober, I it's it's

1:19:54

almost like I just had a came

1:19:56

out of a trance epiphany like 230 in

1:19:59

the afternoon. one day and was like, that

1:20:02

wasn't romance and adventure. Whoa,

1:20:06

that was perhaps dangerous. Oh,

1:20:09

I can name many of the experience that

1:20:11

was dangerous. Yeah, in my case and I look back

1:20:14

and like, really, you went

1:20:16

to the trailer? Like,

1:20:18

and like, with someone

1:20:20

you followed a person to their trailer.

1:20:22

And it could be, no, no, I'm divorced or

1:20:24

no, I'm not in a relationship. I used to

1:20:27

say you don't get to that trailer and the

1:20:29

husband's there, anything. And she invited

1:20:31

you back so they could beat the

1:20:33

fuck out of you. It's bananas. Or

1:20:35

just someone walks in and then like,

1:20:38

oh, it turns out you're married and now

1:20:40

I'm going to get murdered. And

1:20:42

it's not, it's her

1:20:44

fault, not mine, or vice versa if it's

1:20:46

a guy with a, I mean, like, it's...

1:20:48

Sure, sure. Yeah, it's, don't, I didn't know,

1:20:50

don't beat me up as I

1:20:52

run in my car. It's wild

1:20:55

to survive sobriety, like

1:20:57

drunkenness and be so,

1:20:59

because I'm so cautious. I'm like

1:21:01

afraid I mess up my taxes. You know,

1:21:03

like now it's, now we're like so

1:21:06

clean and like, oh, I don't, you know,

1:21:09

I'm using handy wipes. And it just, there were

1:21:11

just many years of, it's just

1:21:13

so reckless. Yeah. Oh, no question about

1:21:15

it. Yeah. No question about it. That's the voice

1:21:17

of Laura House here. She used to love to

1:21:19

fuck and now she doesn't. Oh, wow. Well, that's

1:21:22

what your words are not mine. Those are your

1:21:24

words. That's fair. Yeah. 20s and 30s. Those

1:21:26

are the right words. We,

1:21:31

the name of the show over there at the Crow

1:21:33

is the, it's called the Sober. Party on. Party on.

1:21:35

We kind of, you know, I gave it a little name, but you tend to

1:21:37

just go, that's the Sober comedy show. We

1:21:41

were just in, we're in LA Magazine. I

1:21:43

saw that. Oh, cool. Did you? Yeah. Nice.

1:21:45

It's very weird that like super

1:21:49

mega stoner Bill Maher is on

1:21:51

the cover. That's weird for a four

1:21:53

20 for like, for it's the April edition.

1:21:55

So it's like all four 20 and then, but

1:21:57

kind of the center story is like.

1:22:00

sober comics, doing sober comedy, but

1:22:03

we didn't warrant the cover, I guess. Well, you

1:22:05

can't be Bill Maher. You said that you know,

1:22:07

but Mark Maron was mentioned and Brad

1:22:09

Garrett is in the story. Is

1:22:11

Brad Garrett sober? Yeah, apparently. He's

1:22:13

like 22 years or something. Oh, I didn't

1:22:15

know he was not. I didn't know that was

1:22:18

a thing. I didn't either. Yeah, it's a

1:22:20

good article. Oh. About there's

1:22:22

kind of a, I had heard there's kind of

1:22:24

a trend around the nation of like even young

1:22:26

people aren't drinking as much

1:22:28

as older generations. So like

1:22:30

alcohol-free lifestyle is having

1:22:32

a moment and trending and then there's I

1:22:35

guess kind of comedy stuff popping

1:22:37

up around of people who are like. There's

1:22:42

something interesting where comedy is almost invented just to

1:22:44

sell drinks, you know, or whatever, or like that's

1:22:46

what the comedy club is. You know, oh, these

1:22:48

people talk and then you know, you buy $15 drinks.

1:22:51

And so it is a little, I guess

1:22:53

in that sense, it's a little weird sober comedy or

1:22:56

whatever because what drinks you're going to

1:22:58

buy, but can

1:23:00

still buy nachos. They're still very, they're

1:23:02

still a good, still a good markup on

1:23:04

those. Also, as someone who I never drank

1:23:06

in my life, but I love comedy, it's

1:23:08

to me, it's like then it's good comedy.

1:23:10

Like you're there for good comedy. It's not

1:23:12

the comedy isn't just an excuse to get

1:23:14

drunk like, oh, let's do this event. Like

1:23:16

I think there are a lot of people

1:23:18

who their sort of their social life is

1:23:20

sort of dictated by like, and when are

1:23:22

the drinks? Yeah, where do we drink? And

1:23:25

so like the comedy has to be good if

1:23:28

it's going to be people who aren't drinking.

1:23:30

And so you can sort of know this is

1:23:32

going to be a good show because nobody's drunk.

1:23:34

I like that point of view that now I

1:23:36

feel a weird pressure about the show. I'm going

1:23:38

to go the other way though. Whenever there's been

1:23:40

comments, the sober show, like, and then you see

1:23:42

the lineup, you're like, oh, that's so much, they're

1:23:45

proselytizing. That's kind of weird. No,

1:23:47

it's not. But you mean

1:23:49

like it's lower level. It's lower level comedians. That's

1:23:53

what I don't want on the

1:23:55

show. Like, like genuine. There's so

1:23:57

many great sober, genuinely super good.

1:24:00

Comedian sure I

1:24:02

like that I Garren I Press

1:24:05

my button incorrectly here on the clock. What do we

1:24:07

at I? Got 118 118 thank

1:24:09

you for your time I

1:24:12

think we all heard it because you pressed it it

1:24:14

made a sad beep and then you got mad and

1:24:16

pressed it again Yeah, and that turned it off. Yeah,

1:24:18

so I did I didn't press it on yes, it

1:24:21

did why is that so Finicky

1:24:23

with the noise I think it has to do with again like

1:24:25

none like my pad over here to the pressure that I press

1:24:27

it Is it but getting

1:24:30

back to what we were just talking about I I also Hate

1:24:32

it even when I drank I hated this

1:24:35

when it when an MC would say don't forget the

1:24:37

more you drink the funnier We get oh, right. I

1:24:39

always be like they go fuck your stuff, right? That's

1:24:42

not true dickhead. Yeah Yeah,

1:24:46

we it's probably true for some comics and that's right.

1:24:48

That's a problem in another though It's such a

1:24:50

comedy does not stand the test of

1:24:52

consciousness That's how

1:24:54

little we tried we need you to Fully

1:24:57

functioning mentally right enjoy the we're just gonna get

1:24:59

you drunk and then just kind of sing a

1:25:01

couple of songs Is that all right? We're just

1:25:03

gonna wait. We're just gonna do some crackling rose

1:25:06

and then call it a night and and

1:25:08

thank you I

1:25:11

would do that show Yeah,

1:25:17

whatever people get

1:25:20

on board About Caroline

1:25:23

oh, yeah Yeah,

1:25:26

exactly Somebody

1:25:28

asked this recently about Neil Diamond. Do you

1:25:31

think he likes that what they've added to

1:25:33

that song? Like do you think he

1:25:35

wanted that? Right. Do you think

1:25:37

Tommy James wanted? Hey get laid get fucked in the

1:25:39

middle of Moni Mona No, he didn't if he would

1:25:41

have written it you weirdos But

1:25:44

don't you love being in on a this probably didn't

1:25:47

happen the black crows concert because you don't know their

1:25:49

music But I love at a concert when everyone knows

1:25:51

what's up like at Bruce Springsteen I didn't know what

1:25:53

to do, but it's fun when a you

1:25:55

know, 15,000 people are like this is when

1:25:58

we'd go blah blah blah Kind

1:26:00

of a fun but see but the Neil Diamond

1:26:03

thing happened away from Neil Diamond concert He didn't

1:26:05

nothing to do it not nor did Billy Idol

1:26:07

right with get laid get fucked It all happened

1:26:09

at a frat. I'm all over at a bar.

1:26:11

I'm guessing it's all but it's Boston's

1:26:13

fault. I'm gonna blame it He

1:26:16

was like it seems like they invented all that I

1:26:18

think Billy Idol Liked

1:26:20

it a lot. That's my my

1:26:22

two cents, and I think Neil

1:26:25

Diamond doesn't mind There

1:26:28

that's where I land on you don't think there's proof of

1:26:30

that I think the question has

1:26:32

come up before and that he's he's actually done it at

1:26:34

one of his concerts or so has Neil

1:26:36

Diamond has done a version of he likes it. I

1:26:39

think so he seems like a pretty easygoing

1:26:41

guy With

1:26:43

a certain good perspective on

1:26:45

like I mean had a pretty good

1:26:47

career Yeah, like enjoyed it had a

1:26:50

nice time am I not there to

1:26:52

be Matt. He's no hall or oats

1:26:56

Is my impression of deal diamond wrong in that

1:26:58

everybody thinks he's like the you know sort of

1:27:00

stayed and cruder But actually he parties I

1:27:03

believe he is a a singer-songwriter

1:27:05

rocker from the 60s and 70s and

1:27:09

Everybody assumed it seems like they invented all that

1:27:11

I think Billy Idol Liked

1:27:14

it a lot. That's my my two

1:27:16

cents, and I think Neil

1:27:19

Diamond doesn't mind There

1:27:22

that's where I land on you know There's

1:27:24

proof of that I think that the question has come up

1:27:26

before and that he's he's actually done it at one of

1:27:28

his concerts or so has Neil Diamond has

1:27:31

done a version of he likes it. I think so

1:27:33

he seems like a pretty easygoing guy With

1:27:37

a certain good perspective on

1:27:39

like I mean had a pretty good

1:27:41

career Yeah, like enjoyed it had a

1:27:43

nice time am I not there to

1:27:46

be Matt. He's no hall or oats

1:27:49

Is my impression of deal diamond wrong in that

1:27:51

everybody thinks he's like the you know sort of

1:27:54

stayed and cruder But actually he parties. I

1:27:56

believe he is a singer-song

1:28:00

writer rocker from the 60s and 70s

1:28:02

and everybody assumes that later he wore

1:28:04

a spangling sport coat so he's like

1:28:06

oh he's a Vegas act he's like

1:28:09

he's a stuffed shirt no

1:28:11

you are right he's a super cool

1:28:13

guy he's a cool dude I mean

1:28:15

listen you like to do in

1:28:17

it I like to do in

1:28:20

it that dude has serious he's that guy's

1:28:22

outdone Oh Diamond Fox I mean oh my

1:28:24

god are you kidding me? the groupies from

1:28:26

here to Iceland in my lifetime yeah there's

1:28:28

no question he just seems

1:28:33

like a guy who has thoroughly enjoyed the

1:28:35

whole ride mm-hmm I met him very briefly

1:28:37

at the Jimmy Kimmel show and he could

1:28:39

not have been more pleasant oh man yeah

1:28:41

very nice man very nice again couldn't you

1:28:43

couldn't there was no time for him to

1:28:46

not be pleasant oh no that's not true

1:28:48

he could have said when I asked for his autograph he

1:28:50

could have said no could have said no

1:28:53

I feel like people make time to be

1:28:55

unpleasant that

1:28:58

was my father's entire life yeah the fact that

1:29:00

he didn't I think is nice that was my

1:29:02

mom was of the generation who

1:29:05

would have loved the Beatles or whatever

1:29:07

but like she didn't she's my mom

1:29:09

was just a like liked

1:29:11

music like music without words

1:29:14

like just there was no

1:29:16

cool music in the house at

1:29:18

all but love Neil

1:29:21

Diamond that was he made it into into

1:29:23

her very limited even

1:29:25

even tolerance of music

1:29:27

she was like oh and I mean as soon

1:29:29

as Thanksgiving dinner was over

1:29:32

she's pumping Neil Diamond Christmas

1:29:34

albums and she and that was always

1:29:36

I did not get to but that was like you

1:29:39

like your showbiz dream or whatever would would have

1:29:41

been to introduce her to Neil Diamond like she

1:29:43

would have lost her mind like it would have

1:29:45

been so sweet what about Manilla and think of

1:29:47

how many women feel that way man oh by

1:29:49

the way same boat no she didn't yeah same

1:29:51

boat is no doubt that's what I mean yeah

1:29:53

I feel like I their music's not similar but

1:29:56

I feel like their career trajectory seems similar yeah

1:29:58

that all of a sudden they came It

1:30:00

became almost a punchline. Sounds like a joke

1:30:02

but they're cataloging. Really? Look

1:30:04

at their catalog that tells you that they're not. I

1:30:06

saw Neil Diamond at the Greek. It was incredible. And

1:30:10

it was a hot August night. Oh, you got a

1:30:12

long winning play. Which I appreciated. And

1:30:15

I saw Barry Manilow at the Hollywood

1:30:17

Bowl. Barry Manilow's show.

1:30:19

So here's two and this is, I

1:30:21

don't know if this is controversial or not but music

1:30:24

guys. I saw

1:30:26

Billy Joel at the Hollywood Bowl. And

1:30:28

I saw Barry Manilow at the Hollywood Bowl. The

1:30:30

Barry Manilow show was so much

1:30:32

more enjoyable. So you're

1:30:34

not mad. I've seen Barry Manilow five times. I

1:30:37

was like, this is going to launch a grenade. I'll go see

1:30:39

Barry Manilow if they announce tomorrow. You're

1:30:41

a fan of him. I brought Oliver twice. Oh

1:30:44

my gosh. We love Barry Manilow. He

1:30:46

shows our joy. He shows a pure

1:30:48

joy. Yes. Because every,

1:30:50

so Billy Joel, I enjoy him. I

1:30:53

enjoy his music. I'm there at the

1:30:55

show. He played the piano

1:30:57

like, I don't know why anybody even

1:30:59

likes us but here we go. And

1:31:01

his whole thing was almost like, I feel

1:31:04

like nobody likes their job. He

1:31:06

was almost like a guy on the office doing

1:31:09

his job. But it's

1:31:12

Billy Joel and he's at the Hollywood Bowl. He

1:31:16

would shrug and launch into the next sign.

1:31:19

I felt weird being into it because I was like,

1:31:21

I don't know. It seems to be annoying him a

1:31:23

little bit. Barry Manilow,

1:31:25

like lit from

1:31:28

within. It was

1:31:30

so joyful. Exactly. Joy is just the

1:31:32

word. He was like, and

1:31:34

this next song, he seemed so happy

1:31:36

to sing even now. But

1:31:38

he just seemed like every

1:31:40

song, absolutely just,

1:31:44

that it was the goal of his life to just

1:31:46

sing it. And whether it was an act or what

1:31:48

I was... I don't think it's an act. Fantastic. I

1:31:50

think he enjoys performing and he's good at it. Very

1:31:52

healthy. He's been good at it for 50 years. He's

1:31:56

never taken it for granted. Or maybe he did at

1:31:58

some point and then came out of that. It just

1:32:00

felt like pure gratitude. I

1:32:03

love it. You've seen him five

1:32:05

times? Sure. I mean, a career

1:32:08

span like that, I mean, had

1:32:10

to have gotten into all kinds of

1:32:12

dips and scrapes. I,

1:32:15

uh, the first time I saw him I went

1:32:17

and was surprised at how much I loved it.

1:32:20

Same, I only said it the one time. And then, I'm

1:32:22

in. Whenever he comes to town, I'm gonna go back and

1:32:24

see him because why wouldn't I? This is, again, two

1:32:26

hours of joy. Yeah, I have a friend who's

1:32:29

a super fan and she'll see him in all kinds

1:32:31

of places and she's like, I'm a fan-a-low. Good

1:32:33

for her. She deserves it. Yeah, she's

1:32:35

part of the army. I'm not so sure that's a thing. Fan-a-low army. Isn't

1:32:38

it? I don't think army, but no, I don't think

1:32:40

there is. A kiss can't be the only one with an army. A kiss is the only

1:32:42

one with an army. No, I don't think so. Actually, somebody else does too. The

1:32:44

Barry Squad? What do you mean? They've gotta

1:32:46

have a... You think about Billy Squire? No, no. That's

1:32:49

not like Billy Squire. I'm just saying that I would join

1:32:51

that army. The Barry Squire? The

1:32:54

Billy Squire. Billy Squire squadron? Squatron. Squire-dron?

1:32:57

Squire-dron? I would do it.

1:33:00

Yeah. I underrated, in

1:33:02

my opinion. Billy Squire? Yeah.

1:33:05

100% underrated. Underrated. So underrated. Mmm.

1:33:09

He's the top... What's that song? It's

1:33:12

not Da Bomb. It's another one that his

1:33:15

song got sampled and he made... Oh.

1:33:18

Second most sampled or... Really? First

1:33:20

most sampled song? Yeah, I forgot. I remember

1:33:22

you mentioned this before. You mentioned this before. I've never heard

1:33:24

it. Is it Da Bomb? Da Bomb is the one that

1:33:26

samples the Chicago song that then made... Yes.

1:33:29

There's a song, Stroke, and he has... Oh,

1:33:31

yes. It's a Christmas song. It's a song you

1:33:34

don't know that was sampled. Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh.

1:33:36

Oh, that's nice. Yeah. I just go...

1:33:38

What a lesson and just put your work out

1:33:40

there. Mmm-hmm. Just keep putting it

1:33:42

out there. Billy Squire. You don't know who's gonna... He

1:33:44

walked away. ...come and sample you. The most sampled song

1:33:47

of all time is called Amen Brother by the

1:33:49

Winstons. All right. 100 or 2,239 times sampled. Be

1:33:53

like the Winstons, kids. Maybe he

1:33:55

was sampled by a song that sold the crazy

1:33:58

amount of... Yeah. There's something there. Whitman

1:34:00

which which person's as Billy Squier. She's not

1:34:02

even a top ten. Or. Just

1:34:04

google Billy Squier samples and it might

1:34:06

be is banned Piper as as opposed

1:34:08

to Billy Squier. Really? Yeah, it might

1:34:10

be. Ah, You go deeper

1:34:13

Music: so I like a lot music. Night

1:34:15

High Speed of New York. I mean by the

1:34:17

way I heard I I had not heard the

1:34:19

song in a long time of the Rails Radio

1:34:21

Ah the do what he does with the Barbra

1:34:23

Streisand. You don't really Flower House Ah I dare

1:34:25

you to listen to that song is in adults

1:34:28

as a married adults. And. Dub

1:34:30

Not. Tear up

1:34:32

Because it is. It is

1:34:35

heartbreaking and it's absolutely. Heartbreaking.

1:34:37

You know? they never plan. That.

1:34:40

To get that they didn't really sing it as a duet that that

1:34:42

was put together. By somebody division and you know that

1:34:44

I'd a year I have says. Array know that

1:34:46

any any better. But her V I know I

1:34:48

feel I didn't know that Zola Get Ready Must now

1:34:50

that amount of not by they say that visual as

1:34:52

a team is rising pieces together. They. Had both

1:34:54

sung the song and then there was

1:34:56

some. Dj some a

1:34:59

whoever put songs together like. Put.

1:35:01

It spliced it is. They had so and then I

1:35:03

think. Than they have performed in they were dollar euro

1:35:05

zone were like lock people really seem to like that

1:35:08

well as third it's great. I had also

1:35:10

heard that Neil Diamond did not like.

1:35:12

That. Part of them. From.

1:35:14

The jazz singer come to America

1:35:17

Man song. At that he didn't

1:35:19

like the speaking. Part in the beginning, all

1:35:21

with the producer's. Like talked images. Do it.

1:35:23

Just do a version with the the speaking. Part number

1:35:25

of the that is so stupid and like

1:35:27

but it's the greatest Her. Six. Months

1:35:30

and how everywhere me that performs that

1:35:32

is. Yeah, finally sweater, That's. Why I think

1:35:34

about see. My

1:35:37

God are you like. What?

1:35:40

I realize that? Hear me and mad Enough

1:35:42

money? What Am I haven't? What? I'm not

1:35:44

my head out of bed bucket full of

1:35:46

money and or because of Yellow Rose What

1:35:48

am I? Yeah, why would that would live

1:35:50

your life during what he got the big

1:35:52

Did. That's it. That. Was, as they

1:35:54

say, endlessly sampled. It was like three hundred

1:35:56

and some models. whoa well for is

1:35:59

there like of thing a song that sampled it? Um,

1:36:02

Druze. 99

1:36:04

Problems. Fix Up

1:36:06

Looks Sharp. Tizzy Rascal. Girl on Fire.

1:36:08

Alicia Keys. Oh, those are

1:36:11

two huge ones. 99 Problems and Alicia Keys. Yeah,

1:36:13

it's a huge hit. Again,

1:36:15

he never had to do a thing in his life.

1:36:17

He's threaded into the fabric of our sound. I

1:36:19

didn't realize that was a sample in the

1:36:21

Alicia Keys. Is that right? I can't think

1:36:24

of it. This girl is on fire.

1:36:26

I mean, I know the song. Oh, but the sample. Yeah,

1:36:28

I don't know. I will continue. Is

1:36:30

it? I will do the whole thing. Maybe

1:36:33

it's just the drum? I don't know. There's

1:36:35

a lot of hip-hop samples of the

1:36:37

song. It's not called Quest. Big Daddy

1:36:39

Kane. Well, you've gotten ducked in, by the way. Oh,

1:36:42

great. They're going into the hall. That's exciting. They

1:36:44

deserve it. Ice Cube, NWA.

1:36:47

Huh? Are you on WhoSampled.com?

1:36:49

Yes. Can you play the

1:36:51

snippet from the original, the sample? Because usually they

1:36:54

put a Q number in there. You

1:36:56

can put her headphones on so she can hear it

1:36:58

as well. Why not? Well, you'll hear it

1:37:00

from his laptop. It's just going to play out of his laptop. That's

1:37:03

a YouTube video. Yeah,

1:37:06

but usually if you play it, it will go to the part.

1:37:09

The YouTube? Yeah, I think so.

1:37:11

Or it should say underneath it. No,

1:37:13

it's just starting from the beginning. Let

1:37:15

me just play Girl on Fire and see what it

1:37:17

sounds like. Maybe Jimmy will work on it. Do you

1:37:20

know the song? Not from that song, no. Are

1:37:22

you familiar with the Billy X Square song? I am, but

1:37:24

I did not know it was in this song, and

1:37:27

I don't think I could pull it out of this song. Okay,

1:37:30

I found what you're talking about, Matt. It says,

1:37:32

here's where it is in Alicia Keys' song. Okay.

1:37:41

Drop it. Don't slap. All

1:37:45

right, here's the Billy Square one. It's

1:37:48

the drop. Yeah, that's incredible. And

1:37:51

now I hear it. I'm like, yeah, I can hear

1:37:53

that at night and at night. That's wild. It's

1:37:55

crazy, right? It's a great drop. And

1:37:57

it's also, it's like... It's

1:38:00

so simple. It's so simple. Yeah, it's like you could

1:38:02

have just played that and no one would have gone,

1:38:04

hey, that's from Billy Squire. I know. Yeah,

1:38:07

that's weird. But good for them. Good for him that

1:38:09

he's given credit for it. Yeah, samples

1:38:11

are weird. Samples are weird,

1:38:13

right? I heard a thing. There's a song

1:38:15

by a rap group called Black Sheep

1:38:17

that I love called The Choice Is Yours. And

1:38:20

I just found out recently that the bass

1:38:22

line from it is like from five minutes

1:38:25

into a random jazz album from 1973 or

1:38:27

something. And on that

1:38:29

same website, you can go listen to it. The

1:38:32

song itself is mostly piano. And then there's like

1:38:34

one little section where the guy on the standup

1:38:37

bass just goes crazy for like 30 seconds. And

1:38:40

they chose that. And they took one tiny

1:38:43

piece of that. Really? They

1:38:45

just took, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom. But he

1:38:47

only does it once in the song. And they just

1:38:49

took that part and looped it. And it's the whole

1:38:51

song. Wow. That's very cool. I

1:38:53

like to hear about jazz musicians getting paid. I

1:38:56

hopefully get paid. To me, that's a good thing.

1:38:58

Yeah, right. My partner is a

1:39:00

jazz musician. Have you been sampled? Now

1:39:04

fingers crossed. I have a new goal. Now

1:39:06

it's something for the vision board. Samples are weird.

1:39:08

No, samples are weird. I think Matt taught us

1:39:10

that. Yeah, we love to hear that. Samples are

1:39:12

weird. That's weird. Samples be

1:39:15

sampled. Your partner, your word

1:39:17

not mine, who

1:39:19

I've saw at both Pop Culture and at the Grove.

1:39:22

He says hello, by the way. He said, please

1:39:24

tell Jimmy hello. And I was like, will he even

1:39:26

know you? Yes. Now

1:39:28

we're not talking. You

1:39:31

guys fought because you said it. Yeah, no, no. We

1:39:33

drag out. No, no. No,

1:39:36

he felt like you would know him. So this would

1:39:38

make him feel good. We taught music in depth at

1:39:40