0:08

Rabiah Coon (Host): This is More Than Work, the podcast reminding

0:10

you that your self worth is made up of more than your job title.

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Each week, I'll talk to a guest about how they discovered that for themselves.

0:16

You'll hear about what they did, what they're doing and who they are.

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I'm your host, Rabiah. I work in IT perform standup comedy, write, volunteer, and of course, podcast.

0:27

Thank you for listening. Hey, everyone.

0:35

Thanks for joining More Than Work this week, I'm really excited because

0:39

today I'm actually heading to a podcast festival here in London.

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I'm going to see my friend, Claire, who runs the Creativity Found podcast.

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And you'll hear an episode that she and I did together of her podcast coming up.

0:50

We're going to do a, my first feed drop here.

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I'm also going to get to see Rich Wilson from Insane in the Man Brain and

0:56

Rosie Wilby from Breakup Monologues, plus a bunch of other things.

1:00

So it's going to be a fun day. Uh, this week, I have a person who started out studying

1:06

philosophy actually in college. And then she is now going back to school to get her master's in writing.

1:14

And she's going to talk about how she got to that decision after spending time

1:18

doing graphic design and video editing. But it's another great episode just around someone finding

1:23

their calling and pursuing it. And I hope it inspires you.

1:27

Um, lately I've been kind of wrapping my game in comedy really, and also on

1:32

the podcast, because I'm doing some things differently in the backend

1:35

that you won't notice because they're really around marketing and stuff.

1:38

But, um, with comedy I'm writing more and trying to enjoy every performance I do.

1:44

And that's something that happened recently where I wasn't

1:47

enjoying what I was doing. And I'm trying to find a way to do that because otherwise, why do that?

1:53

But I think it shows too that we can be pursuing our dreams and

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then realize maybe our dreams have shifted a little bit in that time.

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So anyway, there's just a lot to think about, I guess, or maybe I'm just thinking

2:05

about a lot, but I hope you enjoy this episode when you get to know the guests

2:09

Jazeen and let me know what you think.

2:12

Of course, I would love for you to rate and review and follow the

2:16

podcast as well, but you know that.

2:20

Let's go! Hey everyone.

2:25

So my guest is Jazeen Hollings, and she is a writer, artist, and future ghost.

2:30

How are you doing? Jazeen Hollings: I'm good.

2:32

Thank you so much for having me on Rabiah Coon (Host): I'm just reassured that you are a future

2:35

ghost and not like a present Jazeen Hollings: not a present ghost.

2:39

Rabiah Coon (Host): yeah, I would definitely insist that this was video then, because you wouldn't even show up probably.

2:43

So that'd be amazing, Jazeen Hollings: There's proof that there's life from the beyond.

2:48

Rabiah Coon (Host): Exactly. I would just see your microphone floating around and

2:51

Jazeen Hollings: Yeah. I mean, that would be sweet. I feel like that'd be a much better podcast.

2:55

Rabiah Coon (Host): it'd be really fun to be honest, but we don't have that.

2:58

So, so anyway, where am I talking to you from?

3:00

Jazeen Hollings: Just outside of Toronto, Canada.

3:03

Rabiah Coon (Host): Oh, cool. Yeah. Is there another Toronto?

3:06

Jazeen Hollings: I think there's one in the States. Rabiah Coon (Host): I didn't even know that.

3:08

I live in England now and so I see a lot of names that are also in

3:11

the States for sure, but I know why that happened obviously, but yeah.

3:15

Well, cool. Well, I'm glad to have you here.

3:17

So, first of all, you're a writer and artist, but that's not your full-time gig.

3:22

So maybe let's talk about your full-time gig is, and then go into what you're

3:25

doing that's more than work as it is.

3:27

Jazeen Hollings: Sure. Yeah. So I'm a video editor. I do a lot of like commercial/ corporate.

3:31

Was lucky enough to do some short films.

3:33

Recently cut like a trailer, which was really fun.

3:36

So I do get to do some fun stuff in my, in my money job, but most of it is corporate.

3:42

So it's kind of just, you know, cutting real estate

3:45

commercials and stuff like that.

3:48

Not as creative as I'd like, but it's fun.

3:51

Rabiah Coon (Host): Yeah. Well, so the trailer you did, was it a trailer for a feature?

3:54

Jazeen Hollings: A trailer for a web series. It's like a period piece kind of like Peaky Blinders or Bridgerton,

4:01

but it's like an indie, Toronto Canadian version of that.

4:06

But it was still fun. Trailers are fun to cut. Rabiah Coon (Host): Yeah.

4:09

That seems fun. Cause you're telling this story very quickly, but not giving too much

4:12

away so you have to really decide. And how'd you get into video editing?

4:16

Jazeen Hollings: At school, I was taking graphic design and then I took

4:20

like a motion design class so it was like a like kinetic typography and

4:25

like animation and after effects stuff.

4:27

And I really liked that.

4:30

And then after doing that for a little bit, I started doing

4:35

more video editing stuff cause that's what people asked me to do.

4:38

So I was like, oh, cool. Okay. Let's, let's learn Premiere.

4:41

Let's learn, you know, how to do that.

4:43

And just kept doing it cause I didn't really know what I wanted to do.

4:49

And I love film, like definitely one of my passions.

4:52

But yeah. I just didn't have too much direction. So I was like, oh, this is cool.

4:55

I can like set my own rate, which is nice, you know?

4:57

And. Just kept doing it until uh, fell in love with screenwriting.

5:02

And that's when I was like, okay, I want to write, I don't want to do this any more.

5:06

Rabiah Coon (Host): Yeah. That kind of brings you to now, I mean, I guess you had some big

5:11

news relatively recently about what you're going to do with writing.

5:14

Jazeen Hollings: Yeah, so I applied for my MFA in creative writing because

5:18

I just wanted to transition full time into writing and have some

5:22

real guidance, I think, because being self-taught at something You get to

5:25

a point where you're just like, Yeah. I would love like some intensive, like hardcore guidance and feedback and just

5:32

to kind of take it to the next level. So yeah, I applied to a bunch of MFA programs in Canada.

5:38

And I got into the University of British Columbia MFA program,

5:42

which I should not have. I just want to say that because one, yeah, one, my grades were not as good as

5:50

they should have been from the school. And the other reason being, I had totally like messed up on my application

5:57

and didn't send them a transcript when I should have, and I had to like

6:01

frantically email them and be like, "I'm so sorry, but I messed up."

6:04

So I definitely thought that there was like no chance.

6:06

So, but you never know, so you might as well try it.

6:09

Rabiah Coon (Host): Yeah. And if you make a mistake, just kind of own up to it, right.

6:12

And just try to Jazeen Hollings: yeah. Rabiah Coon (Host): say, this is what happened.

6:14

That's easier to understand then. "Oh no, I did attach it and you didn't get it" or something

6:19

weird, Jazeen Hollings: you can't. really lie through a computer that way it's either there or you didn't do it.

6:26

Rabiah Coon (Host): Yeah. And sometimes it's like, you just forgot and cause sometimes I've

6:29

been late with something before and I've just said, well, I forgot.

6:32

So can I still do it or not? And then it's like, no, it wouldn't be fair to everyone else, okay.

6:36

Or, yeah, go ahead. So. Jazeen Hollings: Yeah. People are actually really like, receptive to the truth when you just tell them.

6:43

Yeah, I've totally just forgot. And they're like, oh Yeah. Okay.

6:46

I'm like, oh, okay. Rabiah Coon (Host): Yeah. All right.

6:48

So I don't have to do my creative writing for this basically.

6:50

Jazeen Hollings: Yeah. Yeah. So Yeah. That's some big news.

6:53

Rabiah Coon (Host): Yeah. That's very cool. And congratulations.

6:56

So you'll be going full time to school?

6:58

Jazeen Hollings: Yeah, I'm so excited. Rabiah Coon (Host): When you did your undergrad, what did you study?

7:01

Jazeen Hollings: So I did graphic design at okay.

7:04

I do university. And then I did two years before that at UFT, University of Toronto for philosophy,

7:11

which, you know, super useful degree. Rabiah Coon (Host): yeah, yeah.

7:16

That and art history both really make parents happy about student

7:19

loans and stuff like that, Jazeen Hollings: Oh, yeah. Very worth it.

7:22

Rabiah Coon (Host): yeah. Okay. And so you didn't finish the philosophy degree.

7:26

Jazeen Hollings: No, I transferred. Yeah. Rabiah Coon (Host): Okay.

7:29

But that's good. It's good to know you don't want to do something and just to stop doing it.

7:33

If you can really . Jazeen Hollings: Yeah. Like I liked philosophy.

7:36

It was just very clear that it's a little bit depressing to study it full time.

7:41

And then at the end of the day it's like, well, what can I do with this?

7:46

And at the end of the day, I just wasn't like passionate about it.

7:49

Like I wasn't going to get my PhD in it. I wasn't gonna, you know, devote my life to the meaning of existence so

7:55

I called it quits and I was like, all right, let's go make stuff instead.

7:59

of. Rabiah Coon (Host): Yeah. So did you do art or any kind of art before you went to the graphic design

8:04

degree or was that your first time really creating, I guess visual art.

8:09

Jazeen Hollings: I had always been into like drawing and painting as a kid

8:11

and like through high school for sure. I was always doing that even when I was really young as well.

8:17

Like just always making something I think.

8:20

And, yeah, I just think that I got a little bit derailed and in high school,

8:24

like everyone was going to traditional universities and degrees, and they were

8:29

kind of like planning out their future their third, whatever 10 year plan

8:33

when you're like 17, which is insane.

8:35

And I just felt like pressure to do the same thing, I think.

8:39

Then I definitely didn't listen to myself at all because if I had, I probably

8:44

would've just been writing and making art since a teen, but I just, didn't.

8:51

Wasn't strong enough, I guess. I just didn't. So, that's the reason why I went to university pretty much.

8:56

Rabiah Coon (Host): Yeah. Well, it's the acceptable path.

8:59

It's the accepted path, right? For everyone, I think, I mean, Either that, or you don't.

9:04

But I mean, like for me, I didn't have much pressure from my family just because

9:09

no one had gone to school prior to me, but it still, I wanted to be a lawyer because

9:14

I thought you need to be a doctor or a lawyer and I was not going to be a doctor.

9:18

So I was going to be a lawyer and I studied political science.

9:21

And then around my second year of some things happened.

9:25

In my life, that changed some perspective for me.

9:28

But also I just took a writing class that wasn't in my major or anything.

9:33

I took sociology too, which sounds weird.

9:35

But like, there was this, it was social deviance.

9:38

So it was Jazeen Hollings: Oh, nice. So yeah.

9:40

like weird social stuff.

9:43

Rabiah Coon (Host): Yeah. And so then I ended up not doing my major for over a year and I was just focused

9:48

on writing and that kind of thing. And I'm just saying this to tell you that, and I'm probably 20 years older

9:53

than you, it was the same thing for me.

9:55

Like I just didn't do it and I should have done it because

9:58

that's what I wanted to do. And I will tell you though, it took me and tell us about 40 to realize

10:02

that that's what I should be doing. And so I'm doing more writing now, but I really am proud of you.

10:07

I don't know you but I'm really proud of you for making that decision.

10:10

Really. Jazeen Hollings: I'm proud of you too. Yes. Follow your dreams.

10:13

Go. \ Rabiah Coon (Host): it is crazy that at 17 or 18 we're suppo as, as people and

10:19

now, well beyond that, but even kids now, like a parents are listening like that

10:23

planning your entire life when you're that age is such a ridiculous thing.

10:27

Cause you have no idea who you are. Jazeen Hollings: I know it's a joke.

10:30

Like, I mean, there's the odd person who's just like, yes,

10:34

I'm going to be X, Y, or Zed. And they've had like, they have that conviction and that kind of

10:39

attitude of like, I don't care. Like nobody's gonna stop met but l ike, I don't know about you, but

10:43

I had like zero confidence at 17.

10:46

Like I don't, I don't, I didn't think I ever was going to get it.

10:50

Rabiah Coon (Host): No. Jazeen Hollings: So Yeah. it is.

10:52

It's kind of insane how much pressure we put on children because

10:56

you're still a child at that point. Rabiah Coon (Host): So as far as screenwriting, you mentioned that that's

10:59

something you realized you wanted to do and now you're going to do your MFA.

11:03

Have you written screenplays already a full one or parts of them or?

11:08

Jazeen Hollings: Yeah. I have a feature which is great.

11:10

It took me so long. It was a nightmarish process, cause I'd never written one before and

11:16

I didn't know what I was doing. And I had like, like eight or nine drafts until it made sense.

11:23

I finished that about a month ago and then I had just had like maybe three or four,

11:27

like short screenplays finished as well.

11:29

So just testing the waters and like seeing what kind of stuff I want to

11:32

make and like, you know, what, what's the process like and what are the

11:36

pitfalls and all that kind of stuff.

11:38

And you definitely don't, you don't figure it out until you

11:41

figure it out until you just do it. So.

11:44

But really great experience though, really rewarding and maybe one day

11:49

we'll get made into something or it will just be a script forever.

11:54

Rabiah Coon (Host): Did you have an idea before you sat

11:56

down to write the whole thing? Or what was your process like?

11:58

Or was it just building the story as you went and how was that for you?

12:02

Jazeen Hollings: Yeah. For this one, I just had like an opening image in my head

12:08

and a song to go with the image.

12:10

You can't really promise a specific song in a script cause of like rights

12:14

and money and all that kind of stuff. But this one started with just like an opening image and and

12:18

like a doo-wop song to go over it.

12:21

And just the story kind of unfolded from there of how did

12:25

we get to this point essentially? But they all kind of start different ways.

12:31

It's usually an image though, for sure. Where it's like, oh, like That's freaky.

12:35

Let's investigate that. Rabiah Coon (Host): Hmm.

12:38

Jazeen Hollings: Yeah. Rabiah Coon (Host): cool. And then in your, in your MFA, are you going to focus on screen writing

12:43

or just writing in general or? Jazeen Hollings: Yeah.

12:45

So they have like a bunch of different courses. It's divided into like a thesis project, so a major project and then coursework.

12:52

So there's lots of different genres that they offer, which is great because,

12:56

you know, I've, I love writing fiction as well, and I love doing poetry.

12:59

So those are definitely genres that I would love to do as, as

13:02

well included with screenwriting. So, I definitely like writing all things, not necessarily screenplays.

13:09

And that's just because I feel like certain stories need different formats.

13:14

A lot of the times I think very visually and I think in terms of

13:16

films, So those stories just go right into the screenplay idea pile, and

13:21

then other stories are like, you know what, I would love to have more than

13:25

120 pages to dedicate to this idea.

13:31

That goes in the fiction pile and so forth and so on.

13:34

Yeah. Rabiah Coon (Host): That's really cool. And then as far as your art and you being an artist, I mean, do you think,

13:40

what kind of art do you do first of all; the graphic design only?

13:43

Or do you do physical, painting and stuff like that now?

13:47

Jazeen Hollings: Yeah. So, I paint, but I guess I call myself an artist more so in the fact of like

13:53

I do a variety of different things.

13:55

So not necessarily just visual art, but like, like I would consider like you an

13:59

artist as well, because you do comedy and that's an art, that's an art form.

14:03

I feel like anyone who does something that's, you know, really creative,

14:06

it doesn't necessarily have to mean it's a visual art thing.

14:09

It's like, it's more of an attitude or a lifestyle, or

14:13

just a way of being, I guess.

14:15

But I do paint for fun, but just for fun.

14:18

Rabiah Coon (Host): It's interesting that a lot of your ideas come to you visually though, and

14:22

Jazeen Hollings: Yeah. Rabiah Coon (Host): versus another.

14:24

I mean, I don't know how everyone's ideas come to them anyway.

14:26

I guess for me, because I'll write different things, but I like, I

14:30

love non-fiction for some reason and always have I guess ever since

14:34

I discovered the New Yorker, I don't know if you've read it. Jazeen Hollings: Yeah.

14:38

Rabiah Coon (Host): There's just amazing, amazing, interesting

14:40

stories in there that almost read like fiction sometimes, because

14:45

they're just done beautifully, right? So I'll just think of an idea though, but not necessarily a visual idea.

14:51

So I like to hear how you're, how you're doing it in that way.

14:55

It's pretty cool. Jazeen Hollings: Yeah. And so do you do you draw from like a lot of like real experiences?

14:59

Cause I know comedy is very much like that where it's like, you kind

15:02

of have to just draw on your own personal experiences and, and that's

15:07

interesting that you like nonfiction, cause maybe that's just like, you know,

15:10

real life is very inspiring to you, Rabiah Coon (Host): Yeah, true.

15:13

And even films that I like and shows, and my mom, we were watching.

15:17

I mean, I don't know if you've seen This is Us, but you know, it's a

15:20

drama, like a family drama show.

15:22

And my mom was like, oh, it was almost too real.

15:25

Like just watching real people this one episode recently, and I investigated

15:30

more about it and I found the one actress has contributed to writing it.

15:33

It was mostly about her character and then Mandy Moore had directed it.

15:36

So it was a female director, but also her who's very invested in the show.

15:40

And so I thought, and it was a different episode than other ones.

15:44

You could see the difference. But I liked that it seemed a real cause I always liked like that things feel

15:49

real, but to the point where they're almost too raw, but I think that's cool.

15:53

Jazeen Hollings: Right. You know, I love that. Yeah.

15:55

Yeah. I'm definitely the same way. I love maybe just like pushing it to a point where it is extremely

16:01

vulnerable and extremely raw because that's where all the good stuff is.

16:05

I don't know if you've seen Fleabag. Rabiah Coon (Host): Yes.

16:08

Jazeen Hollings: Yeah. But like her stuff, she just like.

16:11

Like takes, like the way she writes is like, she just takes a knife and like

16:15

stabs you and then like twists it. Like every, I don't know, every beat or every half a show or have

16:22

like full, full episode or whatever. And you can tell that that's like coming from a real place.

16:29

Rabiah Coon (Host): Yeah, it's rough because she'll say things and

16:33

it's like, well, maybe I've thought that I would never have said it.

16:36

Jazeen Hollings: Right? Yeah. Rabiah Coon (Host): you know, and I think too, some of the best comics and

16:39

people I admire and things I try to do, I don't do much shock or very vulgar or

16:44

anything as far as comedy but I've enjoyed working on things that like around mental

16:50

health, for example, is one subject I'm playing with just because I've had

16:54

experiences with difficulties there.

16:57

And then with chronic illness and things like that that are

17:00

hard to do in a five minute set. I have to do like a longer set in a show in a way to get that out.

17:05

But it's fun to me because I do like, I don't like talking about it necessarily,

17:10

but I do think that there's an importance in sharing those things and and, you

17:15

know, I'll, I'll talk about them in the context of trying to help other

17:18

people or something, but then on stage there's, there's funny things about it.

17:21

There's funny things about certain stuff that maybe doesn't seem

17:25

funny on the surface, you know? And so I think that's fun.

17:30

And I think that that's the part where people say, well, artists are dark

17:33

or comics or always have a dark side and I think it's true, but I think it

17:38

manifests in different ways, you know? Jazeen Hollings: Totally.

17:41

And I think I've somewhat similar to you in that respect of like, I definitely

17:46

gravitate towards darker things just because I feel like they're more real

17:51

or they, they feel more real or they feel like there's these things that

17:55

people just don't want to talk about. And I mean, comedy and, you know in regards to your stand-up is such a great

18:03

way to shove something in someone's face. And be like, look like this thing actually exists.

18:08

It's real. And by the way, it's also a joke because everything is a

18:12

joke on some level, I think.

18:14

But yeah, I love the dark stuff. I think it's like very close to home

18:19

Rabiah Coon (Host): I think you can have both in the same thing, kind of like

18:22

what I guess where you're just saying about colony, but even in a screenplay or

18:24

something like You can have the characters that are depressed or that have some kind

18:29

of maybe personality flaw or something, but it can also be funny, but it's, it's

18:37

different when it's like, you're trying to make it, so they're all happy all the time

18:40

cause that's so unrealistic. Even that person, you know, that it's always happy all the time.

18:44

And I think the biggest thing to me is like, almost thinking about people as

18:48

their Facebook profile versus real life,

18:51

Jazeen Hollings: yeah. Rabiah Coon (Host): And it's like, my Facebook profile looks

18:54

very different than my life does. And people will say, oh, I'm so jealous.

18:57

And I, someone said that to me recently.

18:59

I went on a trip and I'm so jealous. And in my head I was going, you're jealous of what?

19:05

Because like that I'm there, but what about everything else?

19:09

And I know you, you wouldn't possibly even go alone, so you're not jealous.

19:13

So I'm here by myself for one thing, and I know that's not your

19:16

deal, but then I thought there's all this other stuff going on

19:19

they don't know about. And I almost like how in a movie or jokes or whatever you can say.

19:23

"Yeah, here's this person who also has all this going on" and it's there

19:27

so they can be three-dimensional.

19:29

Jazeen Hollings: Yeah. yeah, The three dimensionality is, is I feel like where you get like the real stories.

19:35

I'm recently finished the show. Barry. I don't know if he, yeah.

19:39

Bill Hader show and, you know, he's a Hitman who is lost and doesn't

19:44

know what to do with his life and stumbles across like an acting class.

19:48

And he realizes that acting is what he wants to do with his life.

19:52

And It's just So exploratorave of, of like how we all kind of feel very unhappy

19:59

in a lot of ways until we kind of find the thing that brings our life purpose,

20:04

Rabiah Coon (Host): Yeah. So thinking about just what we've learned about you is that you're pursuing this

20:10

Philosophy degree, then decided to go and get out of that and do the graphic design.

20:14

And then now you're, you've been doing this video editing

20:17

job, which you do enjoy. You've expressed that you do enjoy it, but you have this passion writing.

20:22

So now you're getting out of that and going into the writing.

20:24

And so those are two kind of, I would say, pretty major pivots in your life.

20:29

How did you feel making those decisions and if you can talk about making those

20:35

changes to pursue what you want, because that's a really bold thing to do?

20:41

Jazeen Hollings: Yeah, I guess with video editing, it was just

20:44

like, oh, I'm doing this now. And I actually didn't really think too much about it.

20:48

It was just like, oh, this is something that semi creative that,

20:52

you know, won't make me want to jump off a building essentially.

20:56

Cause I think that if I worked in an office over time,

20:59

that's what would happen. And then when I fell in love with screenwriting, it was just like

21:05

this moment of like, holy shit, like this is what I'm supposed to do.

21:11

And, in a lot of ways, it was extremely terrifying because it

21:15

was like, well, I spent all this time, doing this other thing.

21:18

And obviously like the age thing comes into play where it's just like, oh, you're

21:23

not 16 and you're not really attractive.

21:26

So like how could you possibly live your dreams?

21:30

Which is insane. Rabiah Coon (Host): Well, that's insane anyway, but yes.

21:34

Jazeen Hollings: I realize it's very untrue, so Yeah.

21:36

I mean, you could do whatever you want at any age. I don't think it matters.

21:40

And but it was this really weird thing of I wanna live all of these different lives

21:44

and like be all these different people. And experience all these different things.

21:49

And then writing is a perfect way to do that because you can

21:52

literally just make up any story that you want and, and craft it.

21:56

And you can be different people and explore different problems and

22:00

explore humanity and you know, you can make it funny or you make

22:03

it scary, just so many options. But it wasn't until writing for two years, I think until I was

22:09

brave enough to actually be like, "Hey, I want to make money at this.

22:14

I want this to be my life." And, and I mean, I don't, I don't need to get famous or make

22:20

millions of dollars or anything. I just would like to support myself doing something that I love.

22:25

And that's my main goal. It didn't feel like a choice when I decided to do it, to pursue it full-time

22:31

and to try to get really good at it. It felt like I had to do it and it still feels like I have to do it.

22:36

If I don't write every morning, my whole day is messed up and I'm not happy.

22:41

So I, I don't know. It doesn't feel like a choice.

22:44

It feels like I have to do it. Rabiah Coon (Host): Yeah.

22:48

And so that's your writing, is that that's part of your writing

22:50

practice writing every morning? Did you freewriting or?

22:52

Jazeen Hollings: I do. So sometimes I journal like when I have to get some stuff out, but like

22:56

whatever piece I'm working on, I like to dedicate an hour every morning to it.

23:02

No matter what, because that's the only way that it will get done.

23:06

I think Rabiah Coon (Host): Yeah. Jazeen Hollings: with life, life around.

23:12

Rabiah Coon (Host): Well, I always felt like the mornings, the only part of my day I can control.

23:15

Jazeen Hollings: Right. Totally. Rabiah Coon (Host): And, and in a way I get frustrated if someone,

23:20

if someone calls me or writes to me or something, I'm like, what?

23:24

Like, this was my time and now you've intruded on it, you know?

23:28

And that's not fair to whoever does that, but it's just for me, it's

23:31

like, this is the time I have that no, one's supposed to be bothering me.

23:34

Of course I can put my phone down, but you know, that's another thing, right?

23:38

Jazeen Hollings: Like how dare you encroach on my boundary

23:41

Rabiah Coon (Host): Yeah. Yeah. That I, that I'm not that you don't know about that I'm not respecting.

23:46

Jazeen Hollings: right, exactly. Yeah.

23:48

I've actually, I've thought about that a lot and I think

23:51

it's like a self-trust thing. I feel like it actually has nothing to do with other people or the outside world.

23:56

Cause I would get really pissed off if someone was ruining

23:59

my writing time air quotes. And it's just like, wait a second.

24:03

It's not them. It's me being like, if I don't have this, I'm not going to make

24:08

something, but that's not true. You know what I mean?

24:11

It's. Yeah, it just, I don't know.

24:13

I don't know why creative people get crazy

24:18

Rabiah Coon (Host): absolutely. Jazeen Hollings: when people interrupt them.

24:20

So I definitely think it's more of an us thing.

24:23

Rabiah Coon (Host): Totally. And it's just like, then just don't have my phone out or just

24:26

don't be on logged into something.

24:29

It's very simple. Anyway, if I really don't want to be interrupted, I can

24:32

prevent that from happening. I live alone. I mean, if someone breaks into my flat, that's another issue, you know?

24:38

Jazeen Hollings: How dare you you ruin my creative morning time.

24:41

Rabiah Coon (Host): Just take what you want, but please be quiet. I'm working.

24:46

Jazeen Hollings: Yeah. Rabiah Coon (Host): So you do have some writing on your website

24:49

though, and some blogs and stuff. So can you talk a little bit about what you choose to put out publicly?

24:53

Jazeen Hollings: It's whatever, whatever resonates, I think.

24:55

Yeah. It's weird because for a long time, I was very much just like, Okay.

24:59

let's decide. Let's make a plan and make topics and be very logical

25:06

about it and have a spreadsheet.

25:09

And now I'm just like, if I feel like writing about it,

25:12

that's what I write about. And that's, that's my baseline for what gets out.

25:18

Rabiah Coon (Host): Yeah. I do know someone who has spreadsheets for a lot of things, and I feel very

25:24

seen right now, but also very attacked.

25:28

Jazeen Hollings: Are you a spreadsheeter? I was for a very long time.

25:31

Rabiah Coon (Host): I am. I have I, I am and you filled in a Google form and,

25:35

Jazeen Hollings: I did, Rabiah Coon (Host): then that goes into a spreadsheet, which is super fun, for me.

25:39

And then and I have a spreadsheet for my comedy, so I ,know exactly

25:42

how many gigs I've done and how long I've spent on stage.

25:44

And Jazeen Hollings: I think for that, that makes sense.

25:48

Cause that's like a, I know you're keeping track of all the things, right?

25:52

But I feel like when you come up with a joke, you probably don't have

25:57

a spreadsheet of potential jokes.

25:59

It's more just like you're walking down the street and you're just like, oh, that's hilarious.

26:02

Rabiah Coon (Host): Yeah. And then that goes in Notes. Jazeen Hollings: Yeah, exactly.

26:05

Let's write that down now Rabiah Coon (Host): and itAndvery unorganized and there's like probably

26:09

200 notes that have weird thoughts.

26:11

Like if someone ever opened up my notes and saw what I've written down.

26:15

Most recently it's "plus sized nudists" question mark.

26:18

And I can't make it work.

26:22

I can't make it work. I have not, but I know something there because that statement is

26:26

funny, but you can't just go on stage and say that and that's it.

26:28

Jazeen Hollings: Yeah, but the idea that like, you're like,

26:30

there's something there, somewhere. Rabiah Coon (Host): there's something there.

26:34

So no, but that's, that's really cool that you've just kind of figured

26:39

out over time what you want to do.

26:41

Yeah. And are pursuing it. I think that's, that's so important.

26:45

And I, I like how for you, it's not a, it hasn't, it's not a choice at some point.

26:50

And I think that that's the mistake some people make is that they have

26:54

this calling to do something, but then they somehow rationalize it like

26:59

they can't possibly choose to do that. And I don't think you have to make a living at writing, even if you want to

27:04

write, or if you want to do what I do, comedy, which you're talking way too

27:07

much about on this episode, it's about you but if you want to do art, if you

27:11

want to do whatever you don't, you have to find a way to do it in your life.

27:16

I mean, do you agree that even if you're not doing it, full-time,

27:18

there should be way you make space. Like you said, for an hour every morning, you write for example, right now?

27:23

Jazeen Hollings: Yeah. I feel like you have to make space for the things that you love or else it's

27:28

like, what are we doing on this planet?

27:31

Our job is not to go work a nine to five for somebody else, so that we

27:36

can make money and have a crazy amount of things in a crazy amount of space.

27:42

For some people maybe that is what gets them excited every morning.

27:46

But just for me personally, it's just like, if I don't have something

27:50

that I'm working on that I can express myself with or investigate

27:54

something or, you know, work at then I just don't feel like I'm alive.

28:01

And I know that sounds insane. But Yeah.

28:03

I guess, I guess it just, that's why for me, it's just not really a choice,

28:07

even if I don't make money at it. Cause like I've been writing for two years.

28:10

I haven't seen a cent. Rabiah Coon (Host): Yeah.

28:13

Jazeen Hollings: That should detour someone from not doing

28:16

something but that's the only thing that keeps me going.

28:20

Rabiah Coon (Host): Yeah. So as far as we've talked quite a bit about what's worked for you, but is there

28:25

any advice or mantra that you just like to share with people or something that you've

28:28

come across as that's been helpful to you? Jazeen Hollings: Yeah.

28:32

I guess like my mantra has been be afraid, but do it anyways.

28:38

That's my mantra. And then and I think that, you know, I would tell that to anybody.

28:43

Yeah, Be scared because if you're not scared, then you're probably not doing

28:47

something that's, that's open and real but be scared and then just do it.

28:51

Just figure out a way to do it. Rabiah Coon (Host): I talked to a lot of people about getting on

28:55

stage and get nervous every time.

28:57

Yeah, absolutely. Because otherwise it doesn't mean anything and it's like, do you get

29:00

worried when you publish a piece? Of course, because it's going to be seen and people might have an opinion

29:07

on it that's not great or it is great.

29:10

It's almost scary to do well sometimes.

29:12

I don't know. Jazeen Hollings: Yeah. Well, before the pandemic I had done like a Second City stand up course.

29:19

And I had, and I had done like maybe 10 shows.

29:21

Like I wouldn't call myself a standup person, but I did 10 shows and there

29:26

is nothing more nerve rattling than telling a joke and nobody laughing

29:33

and yeah, there's, I mean, It's like, it's a special skill to be able to put

29:39

yourself out there over and over and over again, hoping for a certain response

29:43

and getting a completely different one. And that's the fear that I think a lot of artistic people have to push

29:50

through like every single time. Maybe Yeah.

29:52

a lot of them probably not all of them. I'm sure there are amazing, incredible people who are just like don't care.

29:59

Rabiah Coon (Host): Yeah. Jazeen Hollings: And I envy those people, but.

30:03

Rabiah Coon (Host): Yeah. Cause when you, when you share writing too, right?

30:06

I mean, it's not just performance, but it's when you share writing or you share

30:11

even, maybe even with your video editing, I mean, you send it to someone and they

30:16

might have feedback you don't like. I mean, I know I've my, one of my best friends in the

30:20

world is a graphic designer. Actually, and then I have other good friends who are too, and I don't know

30:26

how they do it because I mean, in the sense that they have to get negative

30:33

feedback constantly for good work.

30:36

And I don't know how someone does that. I don't think I have the constitution to handle that because I'd be like

30:40

super annoyed all the time, you know?

30:44

Jazeen Hollings: I mean, you get to a point where you just like turn it off.

30:47

Like you just turn off like the, the, like I'm going to take this personally switch

30:53

in your brain, you just turn it off. Some of them are so funny when you're working with like

30:57

business people who know nothing. Absolutely nothing about how things should look and you'll give them

31:03

something and they'll pour hours into it.

31:07

And you're like, this looks sick and they'll come back and then just be like,

31:10

okay, here's something really funny. Okay.

31:12

Here's something really cool that we should do. We should make the font Comic Sans.

31:17

I don't know. We'll just be like, okay, I don't, you could either get upset or you

31:21

can just be like, Yeah, totally. By the way, I'm going to charge you an extra whatever for that.

31:28

I'm going to at least make money. Rabiah Coon (Host): Yeah.

31:31

I feel like Comic Sans should just be called tragic or something

31:34

like this should rename it. And be like, okay, this is not a funny font because too many

31:40

people have taken it seriously. So it's no longer.

31:43

Jazeen Hollings: Yeah. it's like your life is overflowing. Like this is what you use when it's done.

31:46

It's gone. Rabiah Coon (Host): It's horrible. It's horrible font.

31:53

All right, so then I have a set of questions called the Fun Five

31:56

that I just like to ask everybody. So the first one, what is the oldest?

32:00

T-shirt you have and still wear. Jazeen Hollings: Uh, yes, um the oldest t-shirt I have and still wear

32:06

is a t-shirt from a Pixies concert.

32:11

From 11 years ago, I think.

32:14

And I'd like, the color is like deteriorating.

32:16

And I think like, I don't know the print on it is like, can't even tell that

32:20

it's a Pixies t-shirt, but I just love it so much and I'll never let it go.

32:24

Rabiah Coon (Host): Yeah, very cool. Very cool.

32:27

So if everyday was really Groundhog's Day, like it's felt for a lot of

32:31

the last couple of years, because we were had to be in our homes.

32:34

What song would you have your alarm clock play every day?

32:37

Jazeen Hollings: So I think something that would be really funny for like

32:40

other people to witness, but maybe not for me to wake up to every morning.

32:44

would be beautiful day by U2, but just like just the chorus.

32:48

So it would start with like, it's a beautiful day, but

32:52

just for the rest of my life, Rabiah Coon (Host): that would get annoying

32:55

Jazeen Hollings: I think that, yeah, that would be horrible. Rabiah Coon (Host): Yeah.

32:58

Jazeen Hollings: It could be worth it. Rabiah Coon (Host): So, all right.

33:00

Coffee or tea or neither? Jazeen Hollings: Coffee in the morning tea in the afternoon.

33:04

Rabiah Coon (Host): That's smart. Jazeen Hollings: it was, it used to be coffee all day and it was not a good time.

33:09

Rabiah Coon (Host): yeah. Do you like any specific kind of tea?

33:11

Jazeen Hollings: Chamomile. Just like a chill. Yeah.

33:13

Some of that will just wind me down. Rabiah Coon (Host): Nice.

33:17

Alright. Can you think of a time you laughed so hard you cried or something that just

33:21

makes you kind of crack up when you think of it or interact with someone?

33:24

Jazeen Hollings: Yeah, so, recently my boyfriend and I

33:27

have been watching storage wars. I don't know if you've ever seen that show.

33:31

Yeah, I know Rabiah Coon (Host): what you're talking about. Jazeen Hollings: Yeah. It's like people bid on storage lockers and they try to like outbid each

33:36

other and like, like try to figure out how much their wares are worth.

33:40

It's the stupidest, reality show I've ever seen.

33:42

But the theme song is this super American country, like

33:46

gritty bluesy, like yeah.

33:49

Like we are in America and the, the lyrics of it and the melody,

33:56

are like, money owns this town.

34:00

As I go throughout my day, like, I'll be sending an invoice and

34:03

I'll be like money owns this town.

34:07

And just, this is the stupidest thing ever, but that's what

34:09

makes me laugh right now. Rabiah Coon (Host): Great. Yeah.

34:11

That's I know it's like, Ugh.

34:13

I mean, I'm from America and some of the things we put on TV for

34:19

people to watch just amaze me. And then we wonder why people think certain things about us, you know?

34:24

All right. And then the last question. Who inspires you right now?

34:27

Jazeen Hollings: So for me, people usually don't inspire me and I know that

34:32

sounds conceited and weird and horrible.

34:35

But it's actually mostly just everyday things or like situations or like things

34:41

that happen to me that maybe inspire a story or inspire me to write anything.

34:47

I would say that like some of my favorite authors are Margaret Atwood or Alex

34:52

Garland who writes a lot of scifi stuff.

34:55

He's a director as well. He did Ex-Machina and Annihilation and all those sorts of things.

35:00

Stephen King I look, I actually really look up to his work.

35:03

I know a lot of people kind of dismiss him as just like a genre writer.

35:07

You know, he's like, ah, it's this horror and sci-fi and whatever.

35:11

But he's put a lot of himself in a lot of his work in really interesting ways.

35:15

Like The Shining for example, is actually about like his kind of his

35:20

his addiction to alcohol and also the fear of him pushing his family

35:25

away because it's getting in the way of his writing, like his work.

35:28

Obviously it's a very severe, severe metaphor for that.

35:32

But he puts a lot of his own fears into his work and I think

35:34

that's really, really brave. So yeah, I think that's my answer.

35:39

Rabiah Coon (Host): Oh, that's great. I didn't know that about Stephen King.

35:41

I have read some of his stuff a long time ago and yeah, just because

35:46

you're in a genre doesn't matter. And I did I actually read Handmaid's Tale.

35:49

I didn't read the next book. I think it's on my Kindle right now waiting, but that was incredible to read.

35:54

Jazeen Hollings: Yeah, Yeah, she's amazing.

35:58

Rabiah Coon (Host): yeah. And just, I read it after watching the show.

36:01

And so then it, it changed my view of the characters so much.

36:05

Even though it was a lot shorter.

36:07

It was just text. That was a lot shorter and more concise than two, two or three seasons.

36:12

I don't know how many seasons I've been at the show, but it was really amazing how

36:15

in so few words, she got these characters to be so real, you know, it's amazing.

36:22

Jazeen Hollings: Yeah. I, I mean, they're just making like so many incredible shows right now.

36:26

Like, like Handmaid's tale, for example, like the book is, is great.

36:31

And deals with a lot of kind of really scary themes.

36:35

But the show, in my opinion is maybe even more bleak and hits way home.

36:40

Like it hits home way more, I think.

36:43

So yeah. but you know, she's great. I love Margaret.

36:45

I would she's Canadian, which is great too. Rabiah Coon (Host): All right, cool, so if people want to find

36:49

you, where do you want them to go? Jazeen Hollings: Yeah, they can check out my poetry on Instagram at Jazeen

36:55

underscore underscore, underscore underscore (@jazeen____) it's just

36:59

like a long line after my name. There's my website.

37:02

You can check out some of my art there. That's jazeen dot com (jazeen.com).

37:05

Rabiah Coon (Host): Super. Well, it's been it's been a lot of fun talking to you, so thanks

37:08

for being on More Than Work. Jazeen Hollings: Yeah, well, thank you so much for having me.

37:11

It was awesome. Talking about all this fun stuff and also hearing about your comedy.

37:16

I just have like, this really weird, obsession with comics cause I think

37:19

what you guys do is is so hard. Rabiah Coon (Host): Yeah.

37:22

I feel like, yeah, I've talked to more about it than

37:24

I usually do, but that's okay. People can enjoy, enjoy that, right?

37:28

Jazeen Hollings: Yeah. Rabiah Coon (Host): Thanks for listening.

37:31

You can learn more about the guest and what was talked about in the show notes.

37:34

Joe Maffia created the music you're listening to.

37:36

You can find him on Spotify at Joe M A F F I A, Rob Metke does all the

37:42

design for which I am so grateful. You can find him online by searching Rob M E T K E.

37:49

Please leave review if you'd like to show and get in touch if you

37:51

have feedback or guest ideas. The pod is on all the social channels at at more than word pod

37:56

(@morethanworkpod) or at Rabiah Comedy (@rabiahcomedy) on TikTok.

37:59

And the website is more than work pod dot com (morethanworkpod.com).

38:02

While being kind to others, don't forget to be kind to yourself.