0:01

Meternal dot M. She will say to me, you know, mom,

0:07

why do you feel like you can't take a day? Like? Why do

0:10

you feel like everything's gonna shut down if you don't show up for one day?

0:14

Like you need a day? So I decided to give myself a day

0:18

like even And most of the time it's on Sundays. But if I actually

0:22

even take a day on Sunday, which which looks like for me just on

0:27

the couch, yeah, binge, watching Netflix like I like to do.

0:30

When I shut it down, I don't want to do anything. Welcome to

0:34

me Eternal, Home to access and information for mothers of color. This episode

0:38

features actress, model, and wellness advocate Cynthia Bailey as she shares her story

0:43

of managing motherhood and how her experience with fibroids and pregnancy has helped shape her

0:48

wellness journey and advocacy. So thank you for coming today. You know,

0:53

I appreciate this a lot. You know, we were having a conversation earlier

0:56

just about like the platform itself and just like mother hood and like all those

1:00

experiences that we have, right, and it's so different for all of us,

1:03

right, and your mom, I am a mom. Yeah, my

1:07

daughter, Noel is twenty three years old now and I was in my thirties.

1:11

Maybe I was like thirty five when I had Noel. Yeah, one

1:17

of the most life changing experiences. The thing I'm the most proud of is

1:23

being Noel's mom than any of the other things that I have going on,

1:26

and pretty much with all the jobs that I have, that's my number one

1:30

job. Yeah, because you're a busy lady. I am a busy lady.

1:34

Yeah. Yeah. And this third act is no joke, you know.

1:38

I break down my life and my career and acts act When was Cynthia

1:42

the model? Act too? Is Cynthia the reality star TV personality? And

1:48

Act three is Cynthia the actress? Wow? That's a lot. It's a

1:52

lot. So how have you been balancing all that, like with motherhood. I know your daughter's a little older now, but like in the beginning,

1:57

how did that all work together? Five? It's always been a struggle honestly

2:01

for me. I always just had to keep in mind that I'm doing this

2:06

for her, like my success is her success. I always had my mom

2:09

on deck, Leon's mom on deck. I had a full time nanny until

2:14

Noel was like thirteen years old. When we left New York City to move to Atlanta, she moved with us, so she's always had someone there.

2:21

Now she's at a point in her life where she needs me, like it's

2:25

me, it's I'm the person that she wants. And I think, you

2:30

know, when I look back, I definitely had a lot of mommy guilt.

2:34

Even though I was working the whole time, I missed a lot of

2:38

things. I missed a lot of really important things in her life. So

2:42

I got some making up to do. In this third act, I have

2:45

a little bit more flexibility with my life and my schedule. I'm no longer

2:49

in the Real Housewives of Atlanta, so that used to take up a lot

2:52

of my time. So I'm able to really focus a little bit more on

2:55

being a mom. And it's kind of like, you know, she's twenty

2:59

three, but she's always going to be my baby. Yeah, And it's like a different phase about the hood. We were just talking about, like

3:04

recently my daughter has gone on to college, and you know, I feel

3:07

like same mommy. Gil wasn't always able to make these certain things, and

3:12

we kind of are really hard on ourselves, but we have to sacrifice at

3:15

the beginning and we have to do what we need to do for our families to make it work. Oh yeah, I mean looking back my mom and

3:20

go to interrot. Sorry, looking back my mom and go to any of

3:23

my things. Like when I was growing up, because she was it was

3:27

a different time. She didn't have time, she had to work, and

3:30

she was doing things to make sacrifices just to keep you know, the house

3:34

together, just keep food on the table and stuff like that. So I

3:37

think with every generation, I feel like I've definitely was intentional when I became

3:44

a mom about the things that I wanted to try to make sure I had time to do with my daughter, like even just things like just being able

3:51

to communicate with her, Like we talk about everything, things that I would

3:53

never I could never feel comfortable talking to my mom about. We There is

3:59

no like you know, we get it in Yeah almost, I almost know

4:03

too much, which is great, right, because like I feel like the

4:09

better connected we are to our children, the more we can help them.

4:13

Well, you can't protect them if you don't know what's going on. True,

4:16

and you know, as teenagers, you know they go through I think

4:19

I hate it. I hated thirteen thirteen through sixteen I hated that because that

4:25

was the noun talking in the room, only come out for food? How

4:30

was your day good? How did everything go good? Like the one word answers. There was no real communication. So yeah, I didn't like those

4:40

years. I didn't like those years. But now the great thing about twenty

4:43

three is, you know, she's she's grown to some degree. She's legal,

4:47

so we can go you know, she can we can hang out together.

4:51

I'm single again now, so if I want to go out somewhere,

4:55

I don't really go to clubs, but if I want to go to a

4:57

bar or lounge or whatever, like no, I'll come with me, and

5:00

you know, she can have a drink with me, you know on yeah,

5:02

yeah, And I love that because, I mean, she always says

5:06

that's the time she feels as safe as drinking is with me, because she

5:10

knows I'm going to make sure she's good. I'm like, well, girl,

5:12

i'm back outside. You've got to make sure I'm good now. And

5:15

I know that's right. You know it's funny too. I was just thinking

5:18

about what you're saying about like all these different like versions of motherhood that there

5:23

are, right, and it looks different for everybody yes, and right,

5:27

and we I think it's interesting sometimes we have this comparison of like what we

5:30

think motherhood should look like for each and every individual. And I love that

5:35

you've just embraced what it's supposed to look like for you and your family and

5:40

you've made it work absolutely. You know, again, just going back to

5:44

my mom, how the way she mother was completely different from the mother that

5:49

I am. And I do think it's just very individual. I think it's

5:53

very It depends on your circumstances, your finances. You know, when you

5:58

have to make work priority, obviously you're just not going to have a lot

6:01

of time for your kid, and that's just unfortunate. But it's just the

6:05

truth. So yeah, it's it's very individual. And I what I'm the

6:13

most proud of is the fact that, and I know people don't like to

6:16

say, you know, you can. You don't need to be our friend, you just need to be our mom. I'm her mom and I am

6:21

her friend, and and that's it's okay for me. Yeah. Now,

6:26

other moms don't want to be friends with the kids, right, But I

6:30

need to be friends with mine because I need to be best friends with mine

6:33

just so I can you know, keep the lines of communication open and if

6:39

we're best friends, I know everything that's going on. Yeah, So what

6:43

do you think has been the most challenging thing when it comes to motherhood for

6:46

you? The most challenging thing is honestly my time. You know, I

6:54

am a serial entrepreneur. I'm super ambitious. I've had a very successful career

7:00

throughout all the acts of my life from modeling to reality star and then now

7:06

as an actress. I'm super super busy. Just my time, just trying

7:14

to kind of pick and choose prioritize my time. You know, I have

7:20

some me time, Like I want to definitely make sure I have time to

7:25

spend with Noel, but I need a lot of Like what I learned in

7:29

my fifties is I need some me time. You know, I need to

7:31

properly reset and decompress after a day of working. I travel a lot,

7:40

you know, in my business, I always have to kind of be on,

7:43

which is exhausting. So when I say that for people that are in

7:46

the business, like you know, it was like, like I just finished doing the Tamer Hall show, Like what that looks like from the moment I

7:51

get out of the car, that's somebody to greet me. So I can't

7:55

be like, oh, hey, what's up. I gotta be like, ah, he nice to see you guys, excited to be by Yeah,

8:01

you know what I mean. It's just a certain level of energy that you

8:03

always have to have socially in a work environment because it just because people want

8:07

to feel comfortable, and if you don't have that perky, happy attitude,

8:13

they think something's wrong. They can get something for you, and you're like,

8:16

no, nothing's wrong. I'm just tired. But even it's almost like

8:18

you don't really you get to be tired, but you just don't get to

8:22

act tired at work. I think that goes with motherhood too, right,

8:26

Yeah, I oh, trust and believe. When I'm with Noel, she's

8:31

not looking at me like, oh, I know you're really tired, but

8:35

can you make me my favorite you know, home fries that you make me,

8:39

that you make for me. Noel's looking at me like your mom,

8:43

this is what I want. You make it the best. It always tastes

8:46

the best when you make it. Blah blah blah blah blah. And she's not I don't even think you know all things. I get tired so when

8:52

I do, it freaks her out, like, what's wrong with you? I'm like, I think I'm tired. I think I'm just going to take

8:56

a day. But I will say she she hasn't hurts me. She's been

9:01

so so good for me, especially throughout this part of my life, you

9:05

know, starting over again in my personal life. But like she will say

9:09

to me, you know, mom, why do you feel like you can't

9:13

take a day? Like? Why do you feel like everything's gonna shut down

9:16

if you don't show up on one day? Like you need a day?

9:20

So I decided to give myself a day like even and most of the time

9:24

it's on Sundays. But if I actually even take a day on Sunday,

9:26

which looks like for me, just on the couch, yeah, binge watching

9:33

Netflix like I like to do. When I shut it down, I don't

9:35

want to do anything. I don't even want to get off the cat. I would just get up to eat in his bathroom. That's it. But

9:41

one of the things that I love that she taught me. Oh what I

9:46

was gonna say, Well, so I'll do Sunday. But if I feel like by the time I get to Wednesday, I need another day, I'll

9:52

just take another day. And I didn't know that we got to have a

9:56

mental wellness day. Yeah, Noel time, she was like, you know,

10:00

I'll call her and be like, hey, babe, what's up. She's like, Oh, I'm not going to be available today. I'm taking

10:05

a mental wellness day, so I'm not going to be on the phone,

10:07

I'm not going to be on social media. I'm checking out today. And

10:09

I was like, we get a melt to wellness day, Like, I

10:13

don't know, I can have a melt to wellness day. And that's something

10:16

that I've incorporated into my life too, because sometimes I'm not tired. Sometimes

10:20

mentally you're tired, Yeah, and I just can't do it, Like I

10:26

just need to be still and I just need to sit down, and I

10:33

make myself do that, where as in the past, I've just pushed myself

10:37

to keep going until I push myself until I'm sick, and then then I'm

10:41

sick and tired, which then I'm then I'm shut down for two or three days because you know, I may catch a cold or whatever because I'm just

10:46

doing too much. So when you take a look back at the past,

10:50

right and you look at like where you are now in your wellness journey and

10:54

being an advocate in that space, Like what made you like pay attention to

10:58

your health more in terms of like where you are now? I think,

11:05

you know, as a woman of a certain age. You know, just

11:09

from the moment I turned fifty, I knew I had to make my health

11:13

mentally and physically a priority in my life because you know, as you get

11:16

older, you just have to, you know, pay attention more attention to

11:20

those things. I've always been pretty healthy, but I don't want to take

11:26

that for granted, So I try to do things to you know, preventive

11:30

things so I don't get sick. Like I'm just really on top of,

11:35

you know, the things I need, like you know, making you know,

11:37

when I go to the gnecologists or just go get a check up, I'm like, you know, check my hormonal panels. You know, do

11:45

I have enough? Am I low on this? Am I low on that? Like things that they wouldn't normally volunteer to do, but like you just

11:52

have to ask for certain things. So I love, like my my friends

11:56

circle of women who are just always like, hey, did you get you're

12:00

you know, testosterone check? Because I have the testosterone pellet and I feel

12:03

so much better and da da dah, da da da dah. And I'm

12:05

like, wait, I didn't know I was supposed to get that checked. And just little things like that. I think that, you know, health

12:13

is truly wealth, one of the things I know for sure, But I

12:16

don't know anything else. I can be as ambitious as I want to,

12:20

I can be as great as I want to be, But once my health

12:24

shuts down, then I'm kind of like dead in the water in a way,

12:28

because everything shuts down once I you know, if you're not healthy,

12:33

you know, so I don't. I try to stay on top of it.

12:37

Yeah, And matter of fact, I actually I just did my first

12:41

women's health and wellness retreat. Yes, I refresh and revive your soul.

12:48

It was amazing. This was the first one and it actually came to me.

12:50

I was my girlfriend Danika Berry, who was my friend and she's also

12:54

my pr She was hanging out with me at Lake Bailey and We're just hanging

12:58

out on the couch without robes on on and eating chips and drinking cocktails and

13:03

netflixing and we were just talking about dating life and just talking about like our

13:07

kids and like you know, like you know, health things like we were

13:13

talking about like she was like, how's your asked you to doing? How

13:16

was this? You know, how's your cholesterol? How's whatever? And we

13:20

were just it was just such an easy like she's busy, she's a super

13:26

boss. I'm a super boss. I was like, this is so cool to just sit here and chill like this, to make time to just have

13:31

a day like this. I was like, I wish there was like a

13:35

place we could go and be around other women like us and share these kind

13:41

of conversations, because like I got so many nuggets from her, she got

13:43

so many nuggets from me. I was like, if we open this thing

13:46

up to like one hundred, one hundred and fifty women, God only knows

13:48

like the information that we can, you know, get from each other to

13:52

educate each other, to support each other, and to just inspire each other,

13:56

because like, you know, no matter what, there's always that day

14:00

where you're just like, you know, everybody has a day and then you

14:05

just you know, you know, you need that energy and that support from

14:09

your friend and be like Cynthia, you got this, Like you do a

14:11

lot, like you're being really really harder on yourself. So I was like,

14:16

yeah, I wish it was a place that we could go for like, you know, a weekend and just hang out with other bad boss bitches

14:22

like us. And she was like, we should create it. You should

14:24

do like a Cynthia Bailey. You should do it. At first we thought

14:28

about doing a La Bailey. She was like, you should just have women

14:30

come here and we could have like a whole weekend thing and we could do

14:33

whatever whatever. And I was like, yeah, you know what I should

14:37

do that. I should do it. Cynthia Bailey health it well in this

14:39

retreat, and I did. I did the first one in La. That's

14:43

wonderful. It was incredible. It was so incredible. And I think the

14:46

thing that I loved the most was most of the women, the boss women

14:50

that I know like yourself, Like I mostly only see you guys in a

14:54

work capacity. It's always worked. I never see you guys like we just

14:58

when do we ever have time to just hang out and just be present and

15:01

just connect. And when I tell you, these women showed up on a

15:05

Thursday eight o'clock. It was from eight o'clock in the morning until six pm.

15:11

I was like, well, nobody's gonna come at eight, and then I was like, man, you know, we didn't really you know,

15:16

by the time we set it up, we didn't realize it was on a Thursday and whatever whatever, because we were like really putting it around Beyonce's concert

15:20

and I was like, no, I'm going to Beyonce on the second,

15:24

so we should do a retreat on this day. So anyway, that was

15:26

just kind of an oversight. But when I tell you the women, probably

15:31

over seventy five women ended up showing up. Wow. And what I loved

15:37

just watching was them after an hour just put their phones down, put their

15:41

phones down and actually be present and just let it go like we would.

15:46

You know, as soon as they walked in the door, they were giving a robe and some slippers and they just let it go. You know.

15:52

I would look over and see like Robbie Reed like oh the you know,

15:56

getting IV drips and know, getting massage, and I was like looking at

16:00

all these women that I'm so inspired by and that I admire just relax.

16:06

I never see them relax, like everybody's going to be like, hey, I'm a ball so some yeah, here we are on this carpet, here

16:11

we are here, whatever, to just sit. We had we had a

16:15

beautiful home in Hollywood. It's really nice mansion. We had the backyard literally

16:21

decorated, like you felt like you as soon as you walked in the door, you felt like you were like in Bali food and drinks and just like

16:26

people just wonderful panels. But I didn't want it to be like, Okay,

16:30

now we have to listen to a panel. I wanted things to be

16:33

moving the whole time, Like you could be getting ivy drip while there's a

16:37

panel going on. You know, we were talking about fibers, we talk about mental wellness. You know, you don't have fibrosistant not something you're interested

16:42

in. You could be getting massaged during that time. Sure, But it

16:45

was a safe place where women felt comfortable just sharing things about themselves. Like

16:53

I was able to learn things about women that I never even knew was happening

16:57

to them. They just felt comfortab open up. People. Women were crying

17:02

talking about like different dark spaces that they've been in in their lives. And

17:04

we're like, you know when you're going through those things, because I think

17:08

we've all probably experienced different dark times and I remember fighting through different things that

17:14

I've gone through and you feel so alone and you feel like you don't get

17:22

to go through those times like you always have to have it together. And

17:26

just being able to see some of the strongest women that I know in the

17:30

game say oh, yeah, I've been suffering with this, I've been suffering

17:33

with that, but really feeling safe to do that. Like I've never been

17:37

in a situation where I would see these women and it'd be like, oh,

17:40

let's talk about depression, let's talk about this, let's talk about that, you know. So I think it's important for us to be able to

17:48

help each other keep going, just keep going. And I know that sounds

17:52

so simple, but sometimes you just you're just like you need an out system

18:00

that I feel like sometimes we're superwomen and we put this face on you just

18:04

go and we're inside just crying, right, And that's just like not the

18:11

way to be. Yeah. So I love that you're doing that and you're normalizing these conversations because it's so important, right, like it is. I

18:18

mean, hormones are important, you know, ros fibroids are important. Like

18:23

I don't even know what a fibroid is, and I'm just throwing it out

18:26

there, like I know what it is, and so many women don't know.

18:30

Yeah, and that was that was one of the reasons why I didn't.

18:33

I'd never heard of a fibroid until I was pregnant with Noel and I

18:36

was going to get a check them and they were like, oh, you have a little fibroid and what whatever. It was like maybe the size of

18:40

a grape. And I was like, oh, my god, is it gonna hurt the baby? Is it bad? Like what's going to happen?

18:44

And they were like, no, that's fine, it's fine, it's gonna be fine. You're you know whatever. They totally like play it, damn.

18:48

But what they didn't tell me was that this thing is going to continue

18:51

to grow mm and it could down the line cause problems for me a lot

18:56

of times, like when women are trying to have kids if they have fibros,

18:59

that they're too big, the fibers growing and growing growing, it like

19:02

competes for the baby's space in the stomach, I mean in the uterus or

19:04

whatever, so it can be It's a big thing, especially in the African

19:11

American community. Sorry, it's a big thing, especially in an African American

19:15

community because it affects mostly us. So although I no longer suffer from them,

19:22

I actually had a procedure. Let me tell you what it is. A fibrod is like a non cancerous tumor that grows. The biggest one that

19:29

I hadn't grow as big as almost a watermelon sometimes, and my largest was

19:33

like the size of like maybe like a large orange almost. Do you feel

19:37

it almost like a grapefruit? Well, I always have like this this bulging

19:41

stomach, you know, because it has you know, you know, you

19:45

have to have room for it to grow in there. And what happens is

19:48

it's like basically it's like this is like say, this is the fibroid.

19:51

These are the blood vessels that are feeding the fibroid. So the procedure that

19:53

I had, and it just grows and grows and it just keeps them bigger.

19:56

So it's like taking up space and you're uterus. So the procedure that

20:02

I had is called UFE, you'd read a fibroid embolization. So what that

20:04

does is they stick. They like they did an decision down in my area

20:10

down there. And what it does is it's almost like if you could just

20:14

imagine like clogging up the vessels the veins so that the blood can't go through.

20:18

So the blood is trying to go through, but like like if you

20:21

can imagine, it's not like sand, but like whatever, they put it in a blocket. So now the blood can't get to the fibrous so a

20:26

fiber can't grow because it's not getting any more blood. So then adventure to

20:30

shrink shrink shrinks and goes away. So I'm in menopause now, so all

20:36

of that stuff is behind me. And then once I had that procedure, I was done with it anyway. But sometimes it can't. They can come

20:41

back, but that part of my life is over. But I am a

20:45

brand ambassador for USA Fibroids Centers because I felt like, even though it's not,

20:49

you know, my life anymore, I still want to keep the conversation

20:52

going. And one of the best things I did on The Real Housewives of

20:56

Atlanta was use that platform to educate women about fibroids. Wow, so what

21:00

happens if you don't just let them go? Like, well, here's what's

21:04

interesting. It's very individual. You may have them and they may never bother

21:08

you. You may not even know you have them. Your sister could have

21:12

them and they could like torment her like she is super super heavy periods like

21:17

one of the symptoms. Some of the symptoms. I'll just break down. It's like I had super super heavy periods. I was always I was either

21:22

getting on or getting off my cycle. I never could have white sheets,

21:26

I never could wear white pants because I was always like flooding, and you

21:30

know, it's like the blood, big blood clots coming out when you would

21:33

go to the bathroom. I was anemic because of it for many many years.

21:37

I'm no longer a knemic. My sex tribe was kind of low because

21:41

I was always tired, too tired to have sex. In some situations,

21:45

depending on where the fibroid is, it's painful to have sex. It's a

21:48

lot, Yeah, it's a lot. And I think it's Black women.

21:51

We have this thing or we have this expectation to just be able to suffer

21:55

through stuff like oh, well, you know, so what is you know

21:59

whatever? Like a lot of times, you know, jobs never looked at

22:03

it like, oh, this is like you really have an issue. Like

22:06

even if you like you can't call in, you used to not be able

22:10

to call in and say, oh, you know, I have fibroids and I'm just having a heavy mistral cycle. They're looking at you like you better

22:15

put on a big pad and do what you got to do. But it's

22:22

we're learning so much more about fibroids and and there's like people there, there

22:27

are people in place that are really trying to pass certain things through legislation to

22:32

really fight for women who are going through this. Cause it's really like an

22:36

illness to be honest in a lot of ways. So you know, a

22:41

lot of things are happening with that. And I really am happy that I

22:45

actually talked about and on on the Real Housewives of Atlanta because it really did

22:48

get a lot of attention. That's great, and a lot of women, you know, decided to, you know, go get themselves checked out and

22:55

do something about it. Because one of the first things usually your doctor will

22:59

tell you if you even bring up fivebroidses, well, you need to get

23:03

a hysterectomy, and that is that should be your last resort always. So

23:08

that's why a lot of women en up with hysterectomies because they didn't know like,

23:12

oh, I could have done this or I could have done that.

23:15

So I feel like it's important for me to continue to keep the conversation going

23:19

even though it's not personally affecting me. Sure, And it's funny because I

23:25

feel like, you know a lot of times the things that we go through, and it's just to liberate other people, yeah right, and set them

23:30

phrase. So I love that you're using your journey and your story to help

23:33

other women just figure out what might be going on with them, because I

23:36

sometimes we'll just sit in the dark and we hope that things aren't happening.

23:40

And I always say, hope is not a strategy, right, you should really be going to the doctors absolutely getting checked out. You know, culturally

23:45

for us, that's not always the normal thing, right, Like we skip

23:49

going to the doctors, We don't do our annual visits, you know,

23:52

we don't go to the gynecologists like we should. Right, We need to

23:55

normalize those things. So I'm glad that you're advocating in that space. It's

24:00

so important. I love women. I love you know, women are like

24:04

I look up to other women, and I want to always try to operate

24:08

in an intentional space of being able to support and give back to other women

24:15

because I really think, you know, my mindset is like I'm one person.

24:18

I just think we're so much stronger together as like like a big group

24:22

of us than just one person, you know, trying to accomplish things or

24:26

get things done. So what is the next wellness retreat? Well, we're

24:32

thinking about putting one together for Atlanta, definitely for twenty twenty four. We

24:36

want to take it to a tropical island somewhere. I would actually love to

24:40

go to Bali, but the flight is so long. I don't know if because we would have to be there, like the retreat is only three days,

24:45

we would have to be there a week because it just wouldn't be worth

24:48

it to go for three days. Yeah, So I don't know. I'm

24:51

looking at some other options, but I was really pleased with the way things

24:55

turned out, and I'm definitely I feel like this is my call to do

25:00

this. And I was like always asking myself, like, you know,

25:03

there's something else that I feel like I want to do. Like I know

25:06

I do a lot, but I was like, there's something that I want

25:10

to do that's going to help people and specifically women, and I need to

25:15

figure that out. And I was like, you know what, this is

25:18

what I want to do. I want to keep women healthy. I want

25:21

to keep women supported, I want to keep women inspired. I love that

25:25

so much. Do you feel like the modeling, the acting, the motherhood

25:30

has like shaped your calling? Oh for sure, that's my story. You

25:36

know, like one couldn't have happened without the other. You know, when

25:40

I was eighteen years old, I grew up in a small town in Alabama

25:44

called Tesscomby, Alabama. Had I not gotten on that airplane at eighteen years

25:48

old to fly from Alabama to New York City to start to pursue my modeling

25:52

career, I don't think I ever would have ended up moving to Atlanta and

25:56

being like on a reality TV show because you know, one of the main

26:00

reasons they took me is because I was like Cynthia Bailey to models, you

26:04

know when they asked me to audition, so I already had I wasn't a

26:07

household name or famous, but I was definitely very very very well known in

26:12

the fashion industry and I worked with all the greats, so hugely successful.

26:18

So but yeah, so that had to happen, and then you know,

26:22

I feel like, all right, I did that. I want I've always

26:26

wanted to be an actress as well, but it was just never the right

26:30

time, and it was like something that I didn't want to do as like

26:33

a side job, Like I wanted to be able to completely commit because I

26:37

do respect the art of acting. I respect the craft. Noel's dead.

26:41

Leon is a very well He's a thespian. He is a serious, serious

26:45

actor, and I've always watched his process. I watched his process when he

26:48

played David Ruffin in The Temptations, and you know now, he never never

26:53

came out of character. He never came out of character until it was over,

26:56

till it rapped, Like he would come home and he would still be

27:00

David Ruffins. I called him David Ruffin until he was Tola said they have

27:03

wrapped the movie. He didn't respond to Leon. He'd respond anything only David

27:07

Ruffs. He tress like David Ruffin when we went out outside of him filming

27:12

the entire time. So I know what it takes to be great as an

27:17

actor because I lived it and I was around it, and I want that

27:21

same respect. I want that same I want to to grow to have that

27:26

kind of talent and that kind of commitment. And I think this is truly

27:30

my third act. And I think by the grace of God my will,

27:33

God's will be done. I will have great success as an actress as well.

27:38

Amen. Amen, that's great. That's great. So anything coming up

27:42

that we can look forward to seeing you in, Yes, absolutely, I

27:47

have some of the shows I can't talk about right now, but I'll be

27:51

posting about it, and when I can't talk about it, I'll let you know. But I have a show, a movie that just came out on

27:56

two be called Rock the Boat, and I played the mom of this really

28:00

talented actress McKenna. What's what's the name, Parker McKenna, park And McKenna.

28:07

She's my daughter. So that's great. I did a show for stars

28:12

that's coming out in twenty twenty four that's coming out. Actually, I just

28:18

did a movie with Noel. This was the first time we worked together.

28:21

Noel is an actress as well. She's an actress, she's an influencer, and she's also studying to be a therapist as well, which I will be

28:26

her first client for that because I'm definitely in therapy. But yeah, we

28:33

did a movie together called Different with Me and the crazy thing is like,

28:37

we're not We're in the same movie, but she's you know, doing something

28:41

differently than I am. We don't have any scenes together, and it was

28:44

really cool to see her as an actress because I've always known that she had

28:49

a dinner to do it, but she had to decide that that's what she

28:53

wanted to shore. I didn't want to be like, oh, you should

28:56

do this, you're so good. But she does all my stuff. She

28:59

does all my self tape auditions with me, so I'm like, no,

29:02

you're so good at this, like you should just do it. So she finally jumped out there, and I'm excited for you guys to see her work.

29:07

She's incredibly talented. I'm looking forward to that too. Yes, and

29:11

that's a nice time to share together. I know, like we had different

29:17

days and you know, different scenes, but I wouldn't with her. I

29:21

got a chance to go with for her. I was like her assistant the day that she had, like you know, she had like four days,

29:25

only had like two days or whatever. She had a bigger part than I did. But you know, it's always so nice as a mom to watch

29:34

your kids do things that they enjoy doing or just have a certain level of

29:41

happiness or peace. Like I always say, like a happy day for Noel

29:45

is an amazing day for me. If Noel calls me right now, she's

29:48

like, Mom, I just don't you know, I'm just going through some

29:52

things, like immediately my day is done, Like immediately, that takes down

29:56

all my energy because well, she's happy and happy. Yeah, Like I'm

30:00

a happy person anyway. But when Noel is happy, I am happy.

30:04

Yeah. And when she's not, I honestly am not because I want her

30:10

to be good, of course, I always want her to be good. Yeah, And kids are just such a big part of us, right,

30:15

even when they have grown, and it's like I still feel that, like

30:18

I still feel yes, you, and that's never going to go away.

30:21

No, it's never gonna go away. Yeah. And I think that's good too, because I think even though like my kids are fairly new in the

30:26

adultsy so my son is twenty four and my daughter just turned eighteen, like

30:30

you still feel those things for them, you know, you discern things and

30:34

you're like, I'm your mama, I'm feeling this. Oh yeah, I

30:37

can tell. Yeah, I can tell when something's wrong. I'll call and

30:41

be like, hey, you good, m hm, and she's like I'm good. I'm like, m what's wrong, yeah, and then she'll tell

30:47

me. But you can, like you said, you can definitely feel it.

30:49

Even when the phone rings and I have just a regular ring tone for

30:53

everybody to calls, and I'm like, that's no all calling. I literally

30:56

can sense when she is ringing this phone like this's in a while and I'm

31:00

looking it's it's yeah, it's that innate thing we have as mothers. Yeah,

31:03

which never goes away. No. Yeah, And it's a wonderful gift

31:07

from God. I feel like, oh it really, it's like I have a you know I have because she's she lives in LA and I'm between La

31:15

and Lake Bailey, which is in Atlanta. I love that you have a

31:17

lake. By the way, that's just well, I live on a lake.

31:21

Okay, of course, you know. I had to just be extra and I just call it. I just call it Lake Bailey. You know.

31:26

My neighbors are like, it's not your lake. I'm like, okay, the part behind my house, that's my property. That part is my

31:33

lake. So but what was I gonna say? I lost my train,

31:37

I'm sorry, and I oh between she's she's in LA. I'm between Atlanta

31:47

and LA, and oh I wasn't gonna say, was I. She's twenty

31:52

three, but I have a tracker on her. Not because I care about

31:57

what she's doing. For me, it's the peace of mind knowing that whatever

32:01

she's doing, she's made it there safely and she made it back. Yeah.

32:05

How did you talk her into that? Because I'm still trying to talk and I into that she's not with it. I have the three sixty it's

32:09

called it three sixty tracker. I just basically said, Noel, like,

32:15

I'm not trying to control or be involved in whatever you're doing. You're grown.

32:19

I completely trust you, but you are living alone in LA by yourself,

32:24

in your house, and I just need from my peace of mind so

32:29

I can get some sleep. If you do decide to go to dinner,

32:32

I just need to be able to look on my phone and see that you

32:35

made it back. Yeah. I don't have to call you. I don't care who you went to dinner with. I don't care what you ate for

32:39

dinner. I just want to make sure you made it safely from point A

32:43

to point B. That's just for my mental so I can get some sleep.

32:46

And she was like okay, and she's like, what can I put

32:49

one on you. I was like, absolutely, if you want to track

32:52

my little boring life, well it's not actually that boring these days, but

32:58

yeah, I'm just kidding. Yeah, yeah, that's good. Right now

33:01

we have fined my iPhone. That's all I have is a little that's what

33:04

we end it. So I'm trying to work my way to the three sixty

33:06

things. But yeah, it's just a good piece of mind. Yeah. They don't get it though, Well your daughter up. You just have to

33:10

explain to them that it's not about like trying to figure out where they are

33:14

you walk them. No, it's just I need to like you're just like hey, okay instead of call I'm like hey, because before I did the

33:20

tracker, like hey, did you make it? Why are you comment like,

33:22

you know, let me know that you made it there? Well, are you driving okay? Are you on the way home? Okay, calm

33:25

me when you get home. And no, I don't have to do that.

33:27

That takes all of that out of the equation. And I just took

33:30

them and be like, oh, she's home. Up, she's up our little car driving. It was like, oh, she's on the way home,

33:35

she's headed toward the house. You know worth every penny. I'm sure,

33:38

yeah, yeah, So listen, thank you for coming here today.

33:42

I appreciate you. You have a beautiful story, you know. I love

33:45

what you're doing for women of color in the space and just the example that

33:50

you're setting. Thank you. We can make it and we can be well.

33:53

Yes, we can, you know, and that's the most important thing.

33:55

And we don't have to like have it all figured out right, but

34:00

we can make it and we can be well. So thank you for being like a wonderful example of that, because that's inspiring. And I hope all

34:07

the women that are listening to this platform, you know, particularly moms right,

34:10

will take some gems away from this conversation that our life changing because I

34:15

know that this has helped me so much just sitting here listening to you,

34:19

and it's been inspiring. So thank you for you and you have inspired me

34:22

as well. And I also want to just enclose and encourage women to don't

34:27

just wait for special days to celebrate yourself, like every day life is a

34:30

celebration. And that's one of the things that I realized at fifty six years

34:35

old. I don't wait for my birthday and for different things to celebrate.

34:37

I celebrate every single day and you have a special thing to celebrate too,

34:42

And I have a good reason to celebrate. I actually most of the ladies

34:46

probably are familiar with my Seagrums x Kates partnership that I have. I created

34:52

my own signature cocktail, the Peach Ballini, which we actually showed on the Real Housewives of Atlanta. And I just launched my second flavor, which is

34:59

the Bear Mimosa. So it's available to wherever Seagrum's Escapes is sold. And

35:05

if you go on to Instagram Seagrum six Scapes, they have so many great

35:07

fun recipes. If you guys are having a girl's night, it's like a

35:12

fun way. We have so many fun recipes to like incorporate super cute cocktails

35:15

and stuff. And I'm just really big on like working hard and also celebrating

35:22

the fruits of my labor. Yeah, and your accomplishment. So congratulations on

35:24

that. Thank you. Yeah. And you're going to be out at the

35:27

iHeartRadio Music Festival I am. I'll be there in Vegas this weekend with Seagrums

35:31

Escapes promoting you know, the new flavor, the Beerry Mimosa. Well that's

35:36

going to be a fun time. Yeah, it is, it is. And uh, you know life, life is good. Life is good.

35:42

Life is good. Life is good. You know. I you know,

35:45

I'm a big believer in praying and manifestation and doing the work because once you

35:54

ask for it, once you manifest it, when you get it, then

35:58

you actually have to step up and do the work. You have to make

36:01

it happen. So I just say to all of your listeners, you know

36:06

you control you, You and God. At fifty six years old, I

36:14

decided that I was going to start my career over. I decided I was

36:17

going to start over my personal life. And a lot of women, of

36:22

people, a lot of women are just people, you know, kind of

36:28

live in a place of fear. They feel like, oh my god,

36:30

I can't quit, leave my job or go into a whole nother career at

36:36

fifty six because people feel like the fifties is old. But I'm here to

36:38

tell you it definitely gets great later and my best days, my last days

36:43

will definitely be my last And I will definitely say that it definitely gets great

36:46

later and my last days will be my best days. One and when you

36:52

look at life like, okay, if I'm fifty six. Let's break that

36:55

down into summers. What is that maybe twenty five summers life. Mmmm,

37:00

Then that's when you really get to live in because you're like, wait a

37:04

minute, that way, I got a lot of living to do. I

37:06

got a lot of celebrating to do. And it just takes that fear out

37:08

of the equation because you don't have time to be scared. No, you

37:13

don't have time. You just got to go for it. And I think

37:15

the saddest thing in the world is to look back in your life with regrets

37:19

and regret not you know, doing the things that you wanted to do,

37:22

Regret not going for certain things, or being in something that you know you

37:29

were no longer spiritually and mentally and physically aligned with anymore. You know,

37:32

just not fully believing in yourself to walk in your purpose and towards your purpose.

37:38

I think that's I think that's that would be very sad for me to

37:43

look back on my life and feel like I didn't just literally people's people literally

37:49

literally literally people say they want to live their best life. When I tell

37:52

you I'm living my best life, I'm living my best life. I'm not

37:57

just saying it. I am living it I could feel. I want to

38:01

continue to be that inspiration, especially to other women, that hey, look

38:07

at me, I'm still going, I'm still standing, and I look and

38:10

feel better than ever and I'm happy and i have my peace and I'm walking

38:15

to my purpose and I'm not afraid. That's what i want to represent to

38:21

other women. That's so good. Well, let me tell you something, Miss Cynthia and Bailey. Yes, you are just as beautiful on the inside

38:27

as you are on the outside. Thank you, and I appreciate you coming

38:30

here today and being so real and transparent because like these conversations need to be

38:36

normalized, yes right, and they need to happen all the time, yes

38:39

right, so that we can all be in a good space. So thank

38:43

you again for you being here today. You're welcome. Thank you for having

38:45

me. Yes, so you are listening to me Turnal on iHeartRadio. I

38:49

am Kenya Gibson sitting here with the lovely Miss Cynthia Bailey. Thank you for

38:53

coming today. God blessed, Thank you, God bless you too. Thank

38:57

you for listening to me. Turnal Station will help mothers of color learn about

39:01

the complexities of fibroid health and how it impacts the black community. Moms will

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also learn ways to create balance and put their wellness and health at the forefront.

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For more information on how iHeartRadio is supporting mothers of color, visit meternal

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dot info.