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Weekly Wingman: How to get over a girl you still have feelings for

Weekly Wingman: How to get over a girl you still have feelings for

Released Thursday, 4th April 2024
Good episode? Give it some love!
Weekly Wingman: How to get over a girl you still have feelings for

Weekly Wingman: How to get over a girl you still have feelings for

Weekly Wingman: How to get over a girl you still have feelings for

Weekly Wingman: How to get over a girl you still have feelings for

Thursday, 4th April 2024
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Episode Transcript

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0:00

You are listening to the How To Talk

0:02

To Girls podcast with Me Trip Kramer. Hello

0:06

and welcome back to another

0:08

episode of the How To

0:10

Talk To Girls podcast. I

0:12

am your Host Trip Kramer

0:14

from Trip Advice coaching.com Weekly

0:16

wing Man back in session

0:18

How to get over a

0:20

girl he's still have feelings

0:22

for? This is an important

0:24

one. Might. Be

0:26

a little bit different from the other weekly

0:29

wing men's in the sense that I give

0:31

you some kind of tips to help with

0:33

attraction but this one is one you're gonna

0:35

want to come back to. I really I

0:37

can make these weekly wing man so they're

0:40

gonna short and sweet. You can come back

0:42

to him and listen to him over and

0:44

over again and just was to help you

0:46

out a time. and for this of course

0:48

I do have some practical tips for you.

0:51

They do have things for you to do.

0:54

So. That you are able to get

0:56

over the girl that you like and

0:58

I know a lotta guys struggle with

1:00

this. This is really inspired by what

1:03

I hear all the time when I

1:05

get questions over Instagram sometimes even over

1:07

the podcast and I think that you

1:10

need a little procedure, a little system.

1:13

So. You can get over any woman that

1:15

need the you like and I am definitely

1:17

one to talk about this. Not because. I

1:21

you know, teach this stuff. But I've.

1:23

Gone through. This is something

1:25

that I have experienced myself.

1:28

I. Had to go through many, many

1:31

times. A. Situation where I was

1:33

getting over a girl that I that I still

1:35

liked it. I mean this went back all

1:37

the way to I can. Even.

1:39

Remember in elementary school and then middle

1:41

school and then junior high and then

1:44

high school, and then even again in

1:46

college and then even again in my

1:48

twenties. But then I finally started to

1:50

get a hang of one I needed

1:53

to do to get over. a

1:55

woman that i still had feelings for

1:57

and i know that you If

2:00

you're listening to this, might be going through

2:02

this right now and it is painful and

2:04

it is tough and easy for

2:07

me to say because I'm on the outside of it

2:09

but trust me my friend, like I just said, I've

2:11

been through it more

2:13

times than I'd like to count and

2:16

a lot of guys are going to go through this

2:18

at least once in their life. Let's

2:21

get into it. How do we get over a

2:23

girl that we still have feelings

2:25

for? This can be

2:27

also help with a

2:30

girlfriend that you just broke up with. It can

2:32

be a girl that even you

2:34

never dated before but you kind of like. Maybe it's

2:37

a coworker. Maybe it's a girl that you went on

2:39

one date with but for some reason she's in your

2:41

social circle so you see her all the time. What

2:45

are you supposed to do? Here's

2:47

the procedure. What

2:49

I'm about to say, you might not

2:51

like, you might say, I'm not going

2:53

to do that. That's way too polarizing

2:55

to advice. I can't do this but

2:58

I'm not here to tell you that even

3:00

though it's hard to do, I promise

3:03

you it is the absolute best method,

3:06

the best thing you can do. It's been proven

3:09

time and time again with clients

3:11

we work with, with myself

3:13

included anecdotally, it

3:15

works. Here's what you're going to do. The

3:19

most important thing is to

3:21

erase her from your memory. Now if

3:23

you've ever seen the movie called

3:26

Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind, if you haven't

3:28

by the way, you need to see this movie.

3:31

It is amazing, Jim Carrey, Kate

3:33

Winslet, just

3:35

an amazing film about getting over the

3:38

person you still have feelings for. I

3:41

won't spoil it for you but in

3:43

the movie you can go to a

3:46

doctor and they can go into your

3:50

brain and delete the memories of the girl that

3:52

you just broke up with or that you like.

3:55

Unfortunately, we cannot do that. What

3:57

can we do now? We

3:59

can. Then try and remove

4:02

her by getting

4:05

out any potential vision

4:09

of her. What

4:11

does that mean? That means she should not

4:13

be in your sight at all.

4:16

She shouldn't be in your sight, meaning

4:19

in person. She should

4:21

not be in your sight virtually. Anything

4:25

that has to do with her should

4:28

be removed. Let's go

4:30

into the specifics. First

4:33

and foremost, do not meet up with her. If

4:36

you work with her or you see her on a

4:38

daily basis because you can't help it, I don't know

4:40

what to tell you. Try

4:43

to dodge her if you can. It's

4:45

not about being cold, not trying to get back at her.

4:48

It's about having the memory

4:50

of her be as far

4:52

away as possible. Your most

4:54

recent memory of her needs

4:57

to be as far away as possible. We

5:01

are not going to see her. We're not going to hang out

5:03

with her. We're going to stay away from her. We're going to

5:05

avoid her. Virtually

5:08

we are going to delete all

5:10

of her text messages, get

5:12

her out of your phone. We

5:15

are going to stop texting her obviously. You

5:18

might even go as far as blocking her

5:21

as a way to have her not text

5:23

you so nothing even comes up. You

5:26

are going to unfollow her from all

5:28

social media accounts. This

5:34

is kind of a two-part. If

5:36

you have a bunch of photos with her, I'm

5:38

not going to tell you to delete them. Some

5:40

people like to just keep memories because they're memories,

5:42

not because you still like the person. Either

5:46

delete them, which

5:49

is probably the best idea, or

5:51

put them somewhere else out of

5:54

sight, out of mind, a Dropbox

5:56

account, something like that. I

5:58

would probably just delete them altogether. I

6:02

want you to then

6:04

make sure she's blocked and she

6:06

can't call you so no way

6:08

of her being able to communicate with you. You

6:12

want to make this inevitable. You

6:14

do not want to use willpower. Willpower

6:18

is not for the weak.

6:21

Willpower is not good. You want to

6:24

use willpower the

6:26

least amount possible. Instead

6:29

you want to make it so there's no

6:31

way that you can actually contact you. That's

6:33

why we block her. That's why we delete

6:35

her number. This is going to help and make

6:37

sure you're not looking at her social media, her

6:39

stories, things like that. Anywhere

6:42

else virtually or in

6:44

real life IRL physically

6:47

that we can make sure

6:49

we don't get anything visual

6:53

from her, get her

6:55

in our sight because

6:58

there's no actual secret sauce here.

7:00

She's still going to be in your mind. This

7:03

is not Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind where

7:06

they delete all the memories. She

7:08

is still going to be in your mind. What

7:11

does that mean? That means

7:13

that as long as

7:16

that's the only thing left and

7:18

the last memory of this woman is

7:22

still very far away then

7:25

you now have a shot at

7:27

going through the process called Time Heals.

7:33

Have you heard of that before? Time Heals.

7:36

It's a very famous

7:38

cliche which just

7:41

means that as time goes on you

7:43

will heal. Right now you

7:45

might like a woman that

7:48

liked you, you were in a relationship or maybe who

7:50

knows never even liked your back but you might like

7:52

her. At this

7:54

point the only thing that you need is

7:56

time. If time is

7:58

the solution, time means meaning more

8:00

time away from her. That's

8:03

the only solution here which I've

8:06

ever seen. That means that

8:08

we need to do everything I just

8:10

told you here today to make sure

8:12

that the memory of her is as

8:14

far away as possible. That's why if

8:16

you ever hear of people or you've been

8:18

through this situation before where you have

8:21

a girl in your life who you're

8:23

trying to get rid of and then all of a sudden you see

8:26

something on social media with her or

8:28

you end up getting a text from her and then

8:31

all the feelings come flooding back and it's like you

8:33

have to start all over again. Ever

8:35

been in that situation? If you haven't, it's

8:37

a very real thing and it sucks. You

8:40

put a lot of hard work in for weeks,

8:43

maybe even months to then

8:45

she teases you with some sort

8:47

of picture or text message or

8:49

social media post or something and

8:52

then almost potentially all of your

8:54

work that you've done to get over her

8:56

is just down the drain. That

9:00

happens because now we have a moment where

9:02

we have a new memory of her. We

9:04

see what's going on. We're catching up with

9:06

her in her

9:08

life, especially

9:10

with social media, man. I tell you, social

9:13

media will crush you.

9:16

It was probably a lot easier back in

9:18

the day. Although as I say that, maybe

9:20

I take that back because back in the

9:22

day we met people through our social circle.

9:25

Maybe if that's the way you were meeting women, then it

9:27

was even harder because you had to avoid them in your

9:29

social circle and that can be really tough. I

9:32

don't know. Maybe this has always been a very tough thing. Speaking

9:35

of, maybe you did meet a woman in your social

9:37

circle. What are you supposed to do with that? Tripp

9:40

is telling you right now, don't try to see

9:42

her or all those feelings are going to come

9:44

flooding back and that memory is going to be

9:46

too new of her. What are you

9:48

supposed to do? Unfortunately, if you want to

9:50

get over her, you're going to have to do everything

9:52

you can to avoid it. It's

9:54

going to sound funny to your

9:56

friends because you're going to have to be like, Is

10:01

Carly there? Is she coming

10:03

to the party because she says there I can't go? And

10:06

that might sound weak, it might sound lame

10:09

or you're trying to keep tabs on her

10:11

so you can avoid her. But

10:13

guess what? That's going to

10:15

be way better than you right now in the very

10:17

beginning stages of trying to get over someone, trying to

10:19

just suck it up and deal with it and then

10:22

you see her at the party or the event or

10:24

whatever. Do not let anyone tell

10:26

you that it is weak and that you should man

10:28

up and you should be totally fine. Just like, oh,

10:30

just, you know, be mature, you'll be

10:32

fine. Figure it out. Yeah, maybe down

10:34

the line. I'm not saying avoid her forever.

10:37

She's in your social circle. Eventually you will

10:39

get over her. But right now,

10:41

when the cut is really raw and

10:44

the feelings are still there, it is

10:46

in your best benefit to avoid

10:50

as much as possible. And

10:53

I know that there's some advice here I gave today where you're

10:55

like, well, what am I supposed to do? I

10:57

just block her? Isn't she going to think like that

11:00

I'm mad at her and then she's going to win

11:03

and blah, blah, blah, blah, blah? I've heard that before,

11:05

by the way. That's the retaliation I get when I

11:07

give this advice of like, that's going

11:09

to look, isn't that going to look weak? Who

11:12

cares how you look in front of her? That's

11:15

my answer. Who cares? This

11:17

isn't about winning or losing. And if she thinks

11:19

she won or something, okay, great. Let her win.

11:22

It doesn't matter. She's out of your life now.

11:25

You hear what I'm saying? She's not part of your life.

11:27

You're trying to get rid of her and

11:29

who she is in relation

11:31

to your life. You're trying to get

11:33

as much distance from her as possible.

11:36

So what she thinks of you does

11:38

not matter at all. It

11:40

plays no importance in your life. So this

11:43

isn't win or lose. This is you playing

11:45

the game to help

11:48

yourself move forward faster. And

11:50

the best way to move forward faster is

11:53

to ignore, avoid

11:56

and delete. At

12:00

first, this is going to be very hard.

12:02

This is going to be like going through

12:04

a drug addiction withdrawal. It is going to

12:06

hurt. You are going to

12:08

be depressed. You might even be anxious

12:10

through all this. But

12:13

then if you go through this real,

12:16

real tough period, you end

12:18

up getting where you want to be emotionally

12:20

faster. Otherwise, if you do this kind of

12:22

slow thing where you're like, okay, well, I'll

12:24

just keep her on social media, but I'll

12:27

delete the text messages or I'll delete her

12:29

from messages or

12:32

social media, but I'll keep her on text messages. You

12:34

can play that game if you want. It's

12:37

just going to be a lot slower. I

12:40

told you a second ago, we don't

12:43

want people to be like, oh, man up, blah, blah, blah.

12:45

I'm going to tell you right now, you do

12:47

want to man up in one situation. Here's where

12:49

you're going to try to

12:52

gather the strength as much as possible.

12:54

Through this period of

12:57

deletion and

13:00

getting her as far away as possible. I know that,

13:02

by the way, I know that not all of you

13:04

can follow every single bit of this advice depending

13:07

on what the situation is with the girl, but you

13:09

just want to do as much as possible. If you

13:11

can do all of it, you're in the best situation.

13:15

You're going to have to gather the strength during

13:19

this initial period to

13:21

get through it so that you can actually

13:24

get past this. That

13:28

is my best advice. It

13:31

is the most

13:33

practical and

13:35

the actual most

13:37

effective advice. I've been through

13:39

this, clients have been through it. I've

13:42

seen it all, I've heard it all. I've

13:44

never heard of anything else that works the

13:46

best. Again, this is

13:48

not about saying F

13:50

you to her and this

13:53

has nothing to do with her or any

13:55

sort of passive aggressiveness towards her.

13:58

This has nothing to do with her. All

14:00

about you and your healing. I'll

14:02

say that again. It's all about

14:04

you and your healing. Delete.

14:08

Avoid. Ignore. Follow.

14:12

That and you're going to be in good hands.

14:15

Now. Lot. Of guys

14:17

still struggle. I get it. Would.

14:20

Be Man is always in all always

14:22

be sponsored by. Yours. Truly Trip

14:24

advice, Trip advice, Coaching to have you

14:26

need help meeting a new woman which

14:28

by the way, that's a very popular

14:30

piece of advice. Words I got: You

14:32

want to get over her? Get under

14:34

someone? Do. Whatever it is, you

14:36

know, meet someone else. I'm not really all

14:38

for that. I don't love that idea. But

14:42

when you're ready I would say after

14:44

about a month if you've done this

14:46

properly, bother with. if you've done is

14:48

properly, one month is all you need.

14:51

So. One month have. No

14:53

contact at all with her know virtual

14:55

contact, no social media or everything. I

14:58

just said, you're good in about four

15:00

to six weeks. Me without

15:02

a fully one hundred percent healed, but about

15:04

over fifty percent for sure at that point

15:06

as he could be smart to then get

15:08

back in the dating game you don't want

15:10

to wait too long. Because. It

15:12

he wait too long. The

15:15

news can be wasting time. So.

15:17

Take four to six weeks, maybe sooner to

15:19

heal. when you come back when you're ready

15:21

to get help. Good a trip. Advice: Coach

15:23

and.com We can help you meet more women

15:25

online and in person. We had the strategies,

15:28

we have, the tools, we do it every

15:30

single day and were able to get you

15:32

to the point where you're meeting more women

15:34

than you ever have before then find the

15:36

one that you don't have to go through

15:38

this again. But. If you

15:40

do is sometimes a date and you meet someone

15:42

you like and it doesn't work out. You can

15:44

listen to this over and over again to help

15:46

you know for sure, but my skirt and.com link

15:48

isn't the soon as we can help you we

15:50

do. By the way, For. Dual boot

15:52

camps and we had some common up in

15:55

L A in Miami. We. got

15:57

some in vegas we even were have one

15:59

in london Check out all of the dates

16:02

at tripadvice.com/live

16:04

training. Also

16:06

link in the show notes. I hope that

16:08

this episode helped you. Delete,

16:11

avoid, ignore. Sometimes

16:14

the most extreme advice

16:18

gets extreme results.

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