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1:43

O'neill never acts again. We

1:45

saw kvamme See, you know

1:47

what that means. Thought

1:57

it was an egg roll baby in his.

2:00

Not. Everyone

2:03

images are less so. how?

2:09

On the zone. Over

2:12

the with. Him.

2:20

And. Laugh because they is and his

2:23

own. Router

2:31

to the police officer automotive seventy

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2:50

Are live that long ago at

2:52

the court at our Home for

2:54

Live Cells in Los Angeles with

2:56

a very exciting night? That's right,

2:58

City alone. Neil as a genie.

3:01

The. Movie called to them and a

3:03

please welcome might to coast says it

3:05

says welcome to some as it

3:07

is. No

3:18

souls. Or

3:21

so ago. Soon.

3:33

And are very special guest

3:35

tonight. Welcome Say. All

3:43

right, Here.

3:45

We go Here We go We

3:47

go now. Calcium cause them. I

3:49

will say that this is a

3:51

movie that I saw a busy

3:54

busy of Split The Box the

3:56

cover of a Million Times. Never

3:58

thought to watch it. And

4:00

ah, and so high that it

4:02

is. Why Why wouldn't Why wouldn't

4:04

you. Won't keep

4:06

you one thing that would keep you

4:09

from odds even see the movie stars

4:11

the he'll only else I think I

4:13

thought it would be to real. And

4:17

I couldn't handle the truth. Yup, I

4:20

don't want get into the whole genie

4:22

jin argument and I want to go

4:24

down I don't know much. Another minute

4:27

you start the movie that Can of

4:29

Worms open image. The Question: A

4:31

lot of different things of this

4:33

movie is amazing because it's so.

4:36

I. Mean, we'll talk about the whole thing, but it's

4:38

still an entry level bus Three: I mean, I

4:40

said we can barely gets them in. With twenty

4:43

four hours, we wouldn't get through the whole thing.

4:45

A: There's so much to talk about. His. Ass

4:47

to Watts it for tonight and

4:49

it was a complete joy at.

4:51

His best homework assignment of

4:53

my life was a lot

4:55

to some people know. The.

4:58

Movie starts off with this kid. Has

5:01

a total asshole. Am

5:05

like a bad ass bully mm with

5:07

an associate of establishing that he's a

5:09

bad as bully. Bother,

5:11

bullies, abuse, sit out of. I'm just. Going

5:17

on this this this movie exists

5:19

in a world where bullies have

5:21

bully access. This is Max is

5:23

the most unlike the board to

5:25

character I've ever seen us I

5:27

would say and I don't mean

5:29

I mean he's older now I

5:31

don't know which someone says a

5:33

word that would come. Much

5:36

like see that means written

5:38

that way that lovely child.

5:40

But there's nothing. There's nothing

5:42

about a minimum aging with. Say:

5:44

I'm sorry to hear this. i'm

5:47

really shocked because i'll i cared for

5:49

max and once i found out in

5:52

the apartment seen that he was struggling

5:54

with his stepfather in a zip others

5:56

arrive on the family i thought i

5:59

understood everything about him. This

6:02

kid's dad's been gone for

6:04

years and years. He doesn't

6:06

even remember him and he's got

6:08

the nicest firemen's food to be

6:11

said dad. The best. I'll say

6:13

this, Travis is a saint. He's

6:17

a goddamn saint. All he's

6:19

doing is eating spoonful after

6:21

spoonful of shit from this

6:23

max. It's all he's doing. He's

6:25

just cramming it down his throat and he's like don't

6:27

you worry I'm gonna be here when you're ready. Literally

6:31

Max goes out stays out all night

6:33

and Travis is like let's get him

6:36

a baseball. Yeah like you know. Let's

6:38

take care of him. So we're clear

6:40

Max is 12. We're

6:43

talking about like a troubled 16 year

6:45

old. This is a 12 year old child. I

6:48

don't want to get too far ahead but also Max

6:52

I don't it's unclear how long

6:55

Kazam is around. Yes but

6:57

Max does not shower or brush

7:00

his teeth or change his clothes

7:02

for the entirety of the movie.

7:05

You're right but then he has

7:07

he takes objection with how Kazam

7:09

smells leading to one of

7:12

the most upsetting scenes in the movie

7:14

in which a

7:16

grown genie showers in front of a

7:18

boy. What

7:22

are we doing here? With a giant... I don't know

7:24

who this movie's for. It

7:28

is a children's movie where I mean

7:31

I will say that there is a racist over

7:33

tone or undertone under it

7:35

too with Mac. Well first of all he

7:37

stumbled into a genie. We should establish that.

7:39

While running away from his bullies he finds

7:41

the genie's lamp which is a boombox. Because

7:45

he fell out of the lamp into the boombox. Which I

7:48

didn't even understand. So

7:51

he was in the lamp originally. Yeah

7:53

and then when the wrecking ball comes in you hear On

7:56

the fifth floor lamp shop you hear Kazam

7:58

Go whoa. You

8:02

know my what's going on in Life

8:04

magazine is Suzy like get an apartment

8:06

and I. Really Honestly,

8:08

this a really big question or on.

8:10

We will Now this is

8:12

a very serious question will

8:14

come to find out that

8:16

sack once a career as

8:19

a performer specifically. A rap

8:21

artist. Do you

8:23

think that while in the in the

8:25

regular lamp he always felt that way?

8:27

Or was it something about being transported

8:29

to that goon bars? I

8:36

don't know by this because is

8:39

this rap go back five thousand

8:41

years ago as a proper poetry

8:43

than the answer's yes. Or

8:45

Joey. I even really wrapping Zola.

8:49

I will say or he comes out

8:51

species in like rhyming couplets. well let's

8:54

list so so helps his van zoo

8:56

just know how to zoom side of

8:58

the would soon as bridge and referred

9:01

to as standard z me dogs. Will

9:04

put the genie top. Have been going.

9:08

On bail on a lot. God

9:11

for the first minutes. Ppt Nariman

9:13

top of them as I. I

9:15

mean as the kill my

9:17

ah jeong, Not as. I

9:21

go straight up a murder my own self.

9:25

All I know as at this point I'm

9:27

like this screenplay was written in all caps.

9:31

Nothing. But streaming. Movies

9:34

meant to be. screams. Goal

9:38

A Good Otherwise those who begins to says

9:40

about said pop. Who

9:45

would. Murder

9:49

or for him. Or

9:53

her. her. More.

10:00

or I'll take out my misery. Who's

10:02

that is already one

10:05

of me? That's a slur

10:07

of my dick. You

10:09

wanna be number one? I'm

10:11

sorry boys, that's been charged. But if you

10:14

got the inches, for a

10:16

saccharitis, no matter how avaricious, I'm

10:19

the man that can grant your wish. Hey,

10:22

don't turn your butt on me. I'm

10:25

the man of the age. It

10:30

doesn't stop for so much longer than even

10:32

that. What's interesting

10:34

in watching his arrival is

10:36

that throughout the entire movie, I was wondering, you know, there's

10:39

this issue of does he want to be a

10:41

genie? Does he hate being a genie? Does

10:44

he want to grant wishes?

10:46

It seems like he's like a self-hating

10:49

genie. Like he

10:51

doesn't and he's so angry. Yeah,

10:53

like you're not, you're definitely, I

10:55

wasn't tracking his emotional life. I

10:58

was like, he's like, you've gotta make, first

11:00

it's like he says three wishes, max wishes

11:02

for a car, he's, you

11:04

know, a rusty, not able to do it. And

11:06

then he's like, you gotta make your wishes real

11:09

quick. Well, basically though, what he says is, by

11:11

summoning the genie, the genie

11:14

basically becomes your slave. So

11:16

I don't think anybody wants to be put in

11:19

that position. So the quicker we get this out

11:21

of the way, the quicker I get back to

11:23

kicking back in the bottle, AKA

11:25

the boobox. The boobox, or in my

11:27

mind, all genie understanding is the inside

11:29

of the genie bottle for my dream

11:31

of genie, which seems

11:34

spacious on that show too. Oh,

11:36

beautiful. Later on, later on when they're

11:38

in the basketball court, he says that

11:40

he doesn't want to be a genie and then he

11:42

wants to get out of it. Well now he's talking to people by the book. Oh,

11:45

I see. No, he wants show

11:47

bins. I could not stop

11:49

thinking about when you're just hearing him rap the

11:51

whole time, or whatever he was doing right there. But

11:55

I was like, this is around the same

11:58

time that I think Shaquille had really done

12:00

that. the rap album right email so she.

12:02

Honestly saw I think that he was gonna

12:05

bodyguard this like Whitney Houston style and less

12:07

and be like look at. How. Great!

12:09

I wrap up some one

12:11

hundred percent of years to

12:13

rap songs in this film.

12:15

Vitter: very specific. The genius

12:17

of the autism might be

12:20

like I say, the zebra

12:22

Gb because he's rapping a

12:24

lot about sunni Specific references

12:26

are from three thousand years

12:28

ago. I'm a breeze not

12:30

exist. He. Was a good

12:33

rapper such a terrible what he just

12:35

did might as well have been written

12:37

by running a limo driver from a

12:40

hard. Like

12:42

warm words that the port part

12:44

of Missouri get more these is

12:46

served my these is the comparison

12:48

am can make them. doesn't worry

12:50

about surfing. ah

12:52

I know arming of a i

12:54

think that Shaq is a lovely

12:56

guy a bus but I honestly

12:59

didn't know like I felt like.

13:01

He didn't seem to have any here for

13:03

this kid like it, like it's it's vegan,

13:06

and then they they get the and will

13:08

get to the and. It's. Like oh

13:10

yea I love them in that whole thing as

13:12

when I didn't never got that middle of my

13:14

only friend never got like he was like i'm

13:17

looking out for the steering and I hope I'm

13:19

out know that's not true I feel like during

13:21

which one and a little bit past when he's

13:23

guy i talked to view of these kids to

13:26

do I got a boa okay try to get

13:28

into it and I think with the movie is

13:30

trying to sell us. Is. That. The.

13:33

Sax own the hubris of

13:35

sexy demas I could become

13:37

a rap superstars makes him

13:40

veer off course which is

13:42

to help Max. Fulfill. His

13:44

wishes and as a result, maximize.

13:47

Your child a result

13:49

is that child star

13:52

also movie. after

13:56

after that i believe it's the

13:58

second time you've been push down

14:00

a giant hole. Multiple

14:04

times this child falls upwards

14:06

of five stories. One

14:09

falling through floor by floor by

14:11

floor, floor boards, everything. And one

14:13

just an elevator shaft at

14:15

the end of which he meets his

14:17

end. Yeah. For

14:22

those of you listening, it's not fulfilling, but

14:24

we're just playing the game, falling

14:27

through the floor on

14:29

repeat, which is

14:31

even funny. This

14:36

is a child. This

14:38

is a child doing this movie. I

14:41

think what the director is trying to do

14:43

is show that he is the ultimate tough

14:45

guy. And Kazam tells

14:47

us many times over that he is a

14:49

tough guy. Oh, yeah. Kazam is

14:51

not to be reckoned with. Yeah,

14:54

so Kazam also winds up sleeping

14:56

and spooning this kid, too, right?

14:59

And in the game bed, yeah. But at that point,

15:01

I felt like it was like really huge

15:03

guy with little kid, and they were trying

15:05

to just show as many possible ways to

15:07

show a big guy with a little kid,

15:09

because there's a really weird shot of his

15:11

hand on his face. And

15:13

it was just like, oh, this will make audiences

15:16

laugh, because his whole hand is on this kid's

15:18

face. He can bomb his face like a bandit

15:20

ball. I also

15:22

noticed I think it's his. He could have done that anywhere. He

15:26

could have bombed the kid's face anywhere.

15:28

It did not have to be sharing

15:30

a twin-size bed. Just

15:33

saying. But then

15:36

you wouldn't have seen how big Shaquille is in a

15:38

twin-size bed. That is true. I

15:40

do have a question at the top here, too.

15:42

When the kid first brings Shaquille O'Neal to his

15:44

hangout, is it just

15:46

like a junkyard

15:49

playground? Or where the candy

15:51

comes? Yeah,

15:53

it's like a weird junkyard or something like

15:55

that. It's like a young kid. Sorry.

15:58

Wasn't that the same place? So were

16:00

the were they built

16:02

the G lamp was Almost

16:14

identical plot space By

16:19

the way, you said you had a theory about the well,

16:21

I have an issue about the candy because Okay

16:24

So he wishes for junk food to the

16:26

guy right and then it's like you see burgers

16:28

and whatever and then and then ultimately There's like

16:30

tons of junk food. Yeah, and then like those

16:33

piles of pancakes, right or

16:35

whatever And then yeah, and then afterwards

16:37

I've just so many problems with Kazam's

16:39

magic abilities or like genie abilities and

16:42

then afterwards He's like I'm hungry Cuz

16:45

am says yes, it's like we don't just left

16:48

And a tire thing of food and he's

16:50

like really a big deal about how hungry

16:52

he is And he's like let's stop for

16:54

lunch and he's wearing clothes

16:56

Like we're like they somehow found

16:58

pants and shorts like as big

17:00

too big for Shaquille Oh, yeah, Neil's clothing

17:02

is Setting

17:04

on so many levels like the pills

17:07

that are going like 18 inches And

17:12

it is like this really long shot of his paint

17:14

I'm short falling off him It's like oh if you

17:16

found why don't they fit?

17:18

Yeah at that point you're making clothes.

17:20

You're making a kitchen tablecloth I mean there's

17:22

a big like Shaquille sighs shoe is 22

17:26

So if you like that thing that there's someone larger

17:28

than Shaquille O'Neal, they're making shorts for now and he

17:30

found those Great great I've

17:35

realized who I think the kid is It's

17:38

as if they made as the protagonist

17:40

of a movie the little

17:42

brother from Teen Witch Is

17:49

a real piece of shit And

17:52

then like she takes them and is like

17:54

I took the liberty of ironing your homework

17:57

We're gonna do Teen Witch I

18:00

love that movie. I have never

18:02

even heard of this movie. Holy shit. We're gonna

18:05

do Teenwish for Top That Alone. Oh,

18:08

I do remember Top That. June

18:12

I feel like you would have been. I

18:14

don't remember the brother on Teenwish, but I

18:16

do remember Top That. Of course. Who doesn't

18:18

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18:23

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21:26

as Tude also acted like he could

21:28

have been played by it's like a

21:30

sixty year old man, two sisters and

21:32

he first met his mom I'm like

21:34

his his his mother or his wise

21:37

as a gonna leave me alone wanted

21:39

know I go through my cigar my

21:41

newspaper on and a bigger cities such

21:43

as as I. Was

21:46

in a totally different movie spying seems

21:49

like snacks. Come on max. Max.

21:55

married and runaway this director who is

21:57

them use you pointed out at starsky

22:00

from Starsky and Hutch. I

22:02

think they were so psyched about this opening shot of

22:04

the mom, which was through the vacuum cleaner. The

22:07

mom is staring down the barrel of a

22:09

vacuum cleaner. It's like, ooh, cool shot, Kazam.

22:13

But yeah, the whole mom relationship

22:15

is crazy. Well,

22:18

I mean, we didn't get to the dad. The

22:20

dad, everybody

22:23

just gave up. The

22:27

dad is like, so the movie exists in

22:29

a world in which it's a kid, it's

22:31

a single mom. They're having a tough time.

22:33

She's falling in love with a fireman who

22:35

the kid gives up a

22:38

hard time to, Kazam shows up, and then

22:40

the kid finds his dad, who is a

22:42

villain in a different movie. OK,

22:44

so what I want to know is

22:47

if you had to say, OK,

22:49

the title of the dad's job

22:51

is? OK.

22:55

I think the dad is a

22:58

club runner, club owner.

23:00

I think he's the

23:03

front for a bad

23:05

news business man. For all those bootleg

23:07

CDs. Yeah, he's

23:10

the front man of the club

23:12

that is the front for the

23:14

CD manufacturing counterfeit CD.

23:16

No? What do we think? So Max

23:18

comes in. You don't know. Max

23:21

comes in to his club. So

23:25

they're not divorced, because there's some paperwork

23:27

that has them assigned. 10-year-old paperwork. But

23:29

I'm assuming the mom has talked to

23:31

the dad about it. And the kid

23:33

comes in, and his dad

23:35

looks at him, and he's like, what's your name? He's

23:38

like, Max. And he has

23:40

no recollection. No. Until the

23:42

second time, he says, Connor. And

23:45

then he's like, who's my kid? And

23:48

we're supposed to think he's a dick to

23:50

the kid, but when he finds out he's

23:52

his son, he's really cool to him. Oh,

23:54

is that acceptable? Oh,

23:56

he's only a dick to kids he doesn't know.

23:58

But it was a weirdo. You

24:00

have no idea whether or not you should

24:03

care about this dad and

24:05

his rehabilitation. Yeah, I think it's a

24:07

redemption story for him, if anything. Right,

24:09

but I... Because the dad is a

24:12

piece of garbage. Yeah. But

24:14

is he? Well, he's real mean to his

24:16

assistant. Oh, yeah, what was

24:18

that guy? Oh, yeah. What does

24:20

that guy do? It seemed to me, I'll tell

24:22

you this is what it seemed like to me. It seemed like there's the

24:24

owner of the club, the guy who's eating newbie and go-dots. A

24:27

lot. And that guy loved that guy. Then

24:30

I feel like... Don't you

24:32

feel like that guy was maybe also

24:34

3,000 years old? Yes, halfway through the

24:36

movie I was like, he's a genie

24:39

too. He was a gen, I thought

24:41

he was a gen. He instantly had

24:43

access to like a bunch of information.

24:45

Yeah. Immediately. And

24:48

then the woman who Shaquille goes

24:50

on a date with, what

24:52

she said? I haven't even gotten into this dating life. That

24:55

whole love plot is

24:57

insane. So the

24:59

guy says, I wonder who's eating newbie and go-dots.

25:02

Then we have Max's dad, who I'm going to

25:04

argue is a promoter of... No, he's not a

25:06

promoter. All right, what do you say? Okay, hold

25:08

on. Hold on, this person has... Yeah, sorry. Okay,

25:11

hold on, hold on. Get on my... Get on

25:13

my... Get on my... All right, what do you say?

25:16

You don't have to stand up. I was

25:18

equally confused. And he actually is in

25:21

the industry of music piracy.

25:24

Well, that wasn't really helpful at all. We

25:28

know he's in pirate... That's not a

25:30

job position in the industry of music

25:32

piracy. But in 1996, that

25:34

would have been a big deal. Sure, sure. And

25:37

that's what underground, that's where they're

25:39

doing is making counterfeit CDs. Well,

25:41

I thought it was this. He was the

25:43

club promoter. So you go, hey, Debrat, come

25:45

play my club. Then Debrat will

25:48

come play the club. Then they would secretly

25:50

record it and then sell it. So I

25:52

thought he was the fun man to be

25:54

like, hey, Debrat. And so

25:56

he's a trickster. He was a trickster who

25:58

then was... He's the trickster. tricks

26:00

or God? But then

26:02

why does the guy who's above him, the guy,

26:04

the other genie, why does he... Who

26:07

is not a genie. He must be a

26:09

genie. Why does other genie want... Why

26:12

does other genie want... Like why is

26:14

other genie excited about Shaq's career?

26:19

He saw the boom box explode.

26:22

Okay but did she... Other genie,

26:24

is he making money off of

26:26

the tapes that are being... Like

26:28

a million dollars. The one...

26:30

A million dollars that's for

26:33

a Debrat concert. The

26:35

one night of Debrat is

26:38

gonna net them one million dollars.

26:40

This is what I'm confused by.

26:42

Wait is that... Is Debrat the actual... Yes,

26:44

yes, yes. Okay so they were

26:46

there the next night when Shaquille

26:49

performed right? So why didn't they just...

26:51

When the tape was stolen, why didn't they just like re-record

26:53

them? It

26:55

would make a lot of sense. I mean and

26:58

we're living also in a world that like... I

27:01

know what a Debrat job is.

27:03

For live concerts like and that

27:05

level like, hey you have a

27:07

Billy Joel at Madison Square Garden

27:09

tape? I'll pay thousands.

27:13

It's not like, yeah so why

27:15

was it wasn't like, oh this is

27:17

all new material that the Brad is

27:19

doing. It's just a concert.

27:22

June, you're saying you know what the dad does? Okay

27:25

so I think the dad in the

27:27

legit world is considered like an artist

27:29

liaison to the club. Promoter.

27:32

Yeah a promoter but he's not... The promoter

27:34

to me implies like he's trying to get

27:36

people in the club. He's not

27:38

what he's doing. Is that what you're saying? He gets

27:40

the talent. Yes he gets the talent. He makes him

27:42

feel comfortable. He says some drinks. Whatever. But what

27:45

he's actually doing... You

27:47

think he's like using strategies of

27:50

like those VIP relationships? Yes.

27:52

Yeah. How many guests do you want to accomplish?

27:54

We have bracelets. We'll give them all to those people. So

27:56

Brad is like, I'm not coming unless Nick

27:58

is gonna be there. What

28:01

he's actually doing is organizing

28:03

the piracy. Oh, goddamn it. And setting up

28:05

the... All that stuff. The

28:07

nice guy behind the scenes who's

28:09

ordering pizzas for everybody? Nick? Nick?

28:13

Everybody's friend, Nick? Again, Kazam

28:15

is like, I'm hungry. He

28:17

asked, he was like, was that pizza coming? And

28:20

then he comes, Shazam comes, or Kazam, not Shazam. And

28:23

Shaquille and Kazam together. By the way,

28:25

it should have been Shazam. His name is fucking Shaquille. You

28:28

can't call him Shazam. He

28:31

like, but you have... Shazam already exists. Sure.

28:33

He walks in with like six pizzas.

28:35

Yeah. I'm sorry, I can't let it

28:37

go. I'm so mad about it. Guys, anytime

28:40

anybody's hungry in this movie, all

28:42

they need to do is go

28:44

to that warehouse where

28:47

there is still six inches

28:49

of food, old hot

28:52

dogs and hamburgers, and burritos on the floor. All

28:54

of it is there. So many candy bars. By

28:56

the way, they do set up the rules a

28:58

lot. I'm like, by minute 48,

29:00

the third time, Shaquille's like, no, no, I don't

29:02

do that kind of wish. I'm like, got it.

29:04

We got it. I don't want to move and

29:07

get this. He's like, I wish that you changed

29:09

my dad's life. He's like, no, I don't do

29:11

that. He's like, okay, 20 minutes later. Changed my

29:13

dad's life. No, how many times, kid, that has

29:15

to tell you that's not the shit I

29:18

do. That's ethereal. Yes, ethereal. No,

29:24

is that a rule across the board

29:27

with genies or is this specific? What

29:29

now? Do you mean with real

29:31

genies? I'm

29:35

basing this off of other genies I've seen in

29:37

movies and movies. Sure, like Aladdin. Aladdin's

29:39

really the only one that's coming to mind. And

29:42

I dream of genie, of course. Yeah,

29:44

what was her deal? What did she do? She,

29:47

you know, listen, if

29:49

we are to believe the theme song of the

29:51

show, he is

29:53

an astronaut, right? He falls from space in his capsule,

29:55

lands on a beach. He's walking down the beach. He

29:57

finds the lamp. He

30:00

rubs the lamp, genie pops out of it, he

30:03

fucks her? She

30:05

becomes his life slave. I think maybe it's like,

30:07

one of my wishes is for you to love

30:09

me for the rest of my life, even

30:11

if I turn into a, no that's the other

30:14

one, that's Bewitched. But that's a serial. Did they

30:16

both have different ones? No, just Bewitched. No, just

30:18

Bewitched. But that's a serial. Oh, you're

30:20

Harry Hagman. Right. Yeah. Right?

30:24

But that's, I mean, but... But she was basically his slave for...

30:26

Right, because she's really... I remember this

30:28

being true where genies can only produce

30:30

material objects. Are there any genies in

30:33

the audience? What

30:35

if in the last scene of the

30:38

last episode of I Dream of Genie,

30:40

Larry Hagman dies and

30:43

Genie is finally released from

30:46

having to do the cursed wish that she's

30:48

been doing his whole life,

30:50

which is loving him. And

30:53

then the show ended. That

30:57

would be amazing. That's a real soprano's ender. I

31:01

want to bring up the fact, and this is nothing, not

31:04

trying to be anything, but just calling out a point, was

31:07

there no makeup on this movie?

31:09

Because Shaquille O'Neal sweats like he's

31:11

shooting this movie during a time

31:13

out of a fucking championship basketball.

31:15

Also, there are

31:17

plenty of shots of people trying to wipe

31:20

him and put makeup on him and they

31:22

can't reach his head. And so

31:24

they're like, think that like... Whatever

31:27

the stylistic choice was they chose for this,

31:29

they also chose it in Steel, where he

31:32

also looks like exactly what you said. He must

31:35

have a problem. Like he's doing it at halftime

31:37

of the game. Hey, K. Shaquille, can we do

31:39

one quick shot with you before you get back?

31:41

Yeah, sure man. On the go. Hey

31:44

kid, I can't grant a theory of wishes.

31:46

Shaquille, get back in there. Pass me the

31:49

ball. I have a

31:51

question. Did... K-ZAM

31:54

during the course of this movie admit

31:56

to perpetrating Pompeii? Yeah.

32:01

He lives under the ash for 347 years. Legitimately

32:06

guilty of crimes against humanity. Which is why

32:08

he... He committed a genocide. That's

32:10

why he's in the situation

32:12

he's in, right? Well, no, because I thought

32:14

he was a genie, then he did Pompeii,

32:16

then he went 347 years under

32:19

the ashes, and then I guess something else happened.

32:22

Oh, so he was born a genie. That's a

32:24

great question. No, no, no. By

32:26

the way, we're going to find out right

32:28

now. Why don't we let Shaquille O'Neal tell

32:30

you exactly how he came

32:32

to be a genie in this

32:34

rap and as people who are

32:37

watching this video can see his

32:39

18-inch collars in

32:42

this scene. But this sets up

32:44

how Shaquille became who he is.

32:47

Here we go. This is who the maggots are.

32:49

I'm not soldin' no stands. Is that it? Is that

32:51

the whole deal? You want to be your head? You better get to... I

32:53

did have this friend in the house in the city. We just helped out

32:55

on the video, baby. We... I'm very good

32:57

to be, and I said I'm a genie. She... Why don't we

32:59

jump in that hole? Well, that's a whole soul. Is that some

33:01

of you guys himself? I'm dropping into some arrests. Baby, baby, baby.

33:03

Ray B, man. We were a... A...

33:07

A... A... A... A...

33:11

A... A... A... A...

33:15

A... A... A...

33:18

A... A... A... A...

33:22

A... A... A...

33:26

A... A... A...

33:29

A... A... A...

33:33

And he lean. He

33:37

lean. He

33:40

lean. He

33:44

lean. regarded

33:48

his ass

33:51

Are you chin? I know. I know.

33:53

I know. I know. I

33:57

know. Okay,

34:01

so that's the story

34:05

of how he came to

34:08

be like I know we all

34:10

just watched that together

34:22

and I still don't know what's happening. I

34:25

don't know. I got it. Just like

34:27

him and his buddy saw some pretty

34:29

ladies who had rabies. They

34:32

were then. What is that? I don't understand

34:34

what that was. In the Euphrates. In the

34:36

Euphrates. They were then caught

34:38

by a sultan who put them in quicksand. They were about to

34:40

die and as they were about to die, they were like, oh

34:42

please don't kill us. Then this

34:44

god came down and said I'm going to make

34:47

you guys genies. So we don't know where his

34:49

friend is. His friend is maybe another lamb. Other

34:51

genies. Other genies. Other genies. That

34:55

would have been a better movie. If

34:59

that bad guy had been revealed to be in

35:01

fact. Again I just wonder so it seems

35:03

like being a genie saved his life. But

35:07

it also seems like he hates being a genie.

35:09

I think it's some sort of like indentured

35:11

servitude or something. Like it's not the life

35:13

he has to obey. It's not a life

35:15

he chooses. And I can understand that. I

35:18

can understand that. Well he's at the whim of somebody who could

35:20

be like make a volcano erupt and

35:22

kill everybody and he's got to be like okay.

35:25

I get the part of me and maybe

35:28

this is small thinking but I

35:30

would think it would be kind of nice to

35:32

give someone their wish. You

35:35

know that there's something fun about that. But

35:37

you spent 3000 years granting everybody else's wish and you

35:39

were like what about me? What about my wish to

35:41

be a rapper? Yeah.

35:44

That's also granting my wish. If

35:46

a genie met another genie do

35:49

you think they could ask for a wish? Yes.

35:53

If that genie if

35:56

he knocked the genie out of whatever he

35:58

was in or she... Hey, hey. Hey,

36:02

look, that's a sequel I want to say. I'm

36:04

comfortable living in a world where a genie

36:06

can be a woman. Comfortable

36:10

with it. And then he owed

36:12

them, right? Like he's the

36:15

same rules would apply. Or you run

36:17

into a gen who seems to be the

36:19

most powerful. Yeah. Who could probably

36:21

do a lot more stuff. I gotta tell you, I did not

36:23

see the gen thing coming at the end.

36:25

Yeah. I mean, I feel like when he

36:28

had kind of a Patrick Swayze like from

36:30

going like. Kind of just morphed into

36:32

a giant version of it. Oh, you're

36:34

a giant man because gianter? Yeah. At

36:37

a certain point Shaq is like three stories

36:39

tall. And

36:42

Max is still talking to him. It

36:44

was weird. Max

36:46

is kind of, I feel like Shaq never did reverse

36:48

angles. So I feel like Max was just doing a

36:50

one man show to like a tennis ball and a

36:52

stick. Yeah, right. I

36:54

never felt like Max is truly afraid. Of

36:56

Kazam. He was downright abusive to Kazam. He

37:00

was angry. Like get the fuck out of my bed. Bam.

37:03

Like it was like. Are you kidding? This

37:05

is a strange man in his bed. I

37:18

have no problem with what he did.

37:22

I'm 100% cool and would use

37:24

this movie to show my own

37:27

children how to behave should they

37:29

find a seven foot six

37:31

man in their bed, spooning

37:34

them in the morning. I

37:41

don't have children. It's

37:45

funny though because I wasn't clear on what his powers

37:47

were exactly. I

37:52

agree. Because I know he's

37:54

able to grant wishes, but it also seems like

37:56

he can hear Max

37:58

wherever he is. is and

38:00

then suck Max through space and time

38:02

right and out of like a water glass

38:04

practice so he's like on a date he's

38:06

distracted he tried to tune him out but

38:09

I also I very much agree with you

38:11

June because I was like he could be

38:13

in front of Max at any point and

38:15

Max kept like like leaving and

38:17

getting him and then he had to also be

38:19

there until Max got

38:22

on his bike and then it seemed like

38:24

Kazam had to also get on a bike

38:27

to then race him when

38:29

he could have just like stopped him in front and

38:31

he like put his hand on and said you're not

38:33

gonna ride this bike anymore or probably

38:35

flown I think that's what

38:38

happens he's on this little bike again I

38:40

think this whole movie was like how could

38:42

we make a very big guy on a

38:44

bunch of little things to elicit

38:46

laughter and then and then the bike became a

38:48

flying bike and it was like he was getting

38:50

his powers back I get that's what they were

38:52

trying to do but I mean I felt like

38:54

even with the powers back like when it when the

38:57

kid wishes for candy he doesn't like go

38:59

like oh that's a shitty wish but when the kid

39:01

wishes like for the tape he's like no I'm not

39:03

gonna grant you that you had no

39:06

problem with the candy the candy is

39:08

not gonna pay off ever go back there for like

39:10

what 15 years like oh I'm

39:12

hungry go get my twisty roll from

39:14

this weird warehouse the kid max is

39:16

more afraid of kids who are bullies

39:19

than he is a good man like

39:22

he didn't want to go back to them but

39:24

after the tape he is be in the beginning

39:26

of this movie think about

39:29

the child max's arc of the

39:31

film he is being bullied

39:33

by kids at school then

39:35

he is being relentlessly stalked

39:37

by Shaquille O'Neal his mother

39:39

is trying to bring another

39:41

man into his house he

39:43

finds his father a very

39:45

good man who he forsakes

39:47

he finds his real father

39:49

who's a piece of shit

39:52

gets embroiled in nonsense dies

39:56

is brought back to life and then mourns

39:59

the loss of of Shaquille

40:01

O'Neal. This

40:03

is a crazy movie. Do

40:05

you think that Shaquille, that Kazam,

40:09

brought him back to life? Yes.

40:11

Yes. He did it. Oh.

40:16

June, what did you think happened? How else? That's

40:18

how he became Jen. Yeah, that's who you get.

40:20

That's how he's like, oh, I did it for

40:22

the first time. I

40:25

think what he did was, because he made his own

40:27

wish come true. He was the first time. Oh,

40:29

wait a second. It was the first time Kazam

40:31

has never been selfish. Right. Because

40:34

he always is like, I gotta grant somebody else's wish. I'm gonna do

40:36

my own thing. And that was the first time he was like, you

40:38

know what? I want the kids to live. You're my

40:40

only friend and I want you to live, yeah. But you

40:42

know what? The person you forgot through

40:44

his hole in Max's

40:47

world is his friend. He

40:49

makes a face-do at the beginning. And

40:52

then we only see the friend one more time.

40:54

And he's like, you okay? You okay? He's

40:58

like, yeah. I got a feeling there were a

41:00

lot more scenes with that kid. That kid was

41:02

like, I'm four on the call sheet. I'm so

41:04

psyched to be in this Kazam movie. I'm the

41:06

lead character's best friend. I'm all over this. Here's

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43:43

for music pirateers For

43:46

whatever counterfeiters of CDs

43:50

the bad guys have such

43:52

an easy time murdering Inclusive

43:57

of children murdering anybody

44:00

Like, this is not a

44:02

hyper-violent crime, to just be

44:04

in a warehouse making CDs,

44:06

but they have no problem

44:08

just murdering people. They're

44:12

laughing about it. You

44:14

know what though, Jason? I got the sense that

44:16

piracy was just one part of a bigger

44:19

business they were doing. You think so? You

44:21

think this is like an empire of corruption

44:23

and greed? Well, it seemed

44:25

like when they were in the basement, there were just a

44:27

lot of CDs. A lot of CDs are down there. It

44:31

almost seemed like they

44:34

were waiting for a genie to show up.

44:38

So they were trying to attract a genie so they

44:40

could make the wish to have all the money in

44:42

the world. That was like the long con. Do

44:46

you think that maybe there was an out of

44:48

version of the script where it was like drugs?

44:50

Because drugs would have been so much easier. I

44:52

think what must have happened is that Shaq said,

44:54

I need to rap in this movie. Of course. Just

44:57

shoehorned in. Because the

44:59

way we get into music piracy

45:01

and the understanding of this crime

45:03

is so convoluted and so strange.

45:06

Well, yes, the valuable thing is,

45:08

like we said, live recordings of

45:11

rap artists. And the

45:13

only reason why Shazam, or because I'm sorry,

45:17

K-Zam, gets popular is because the brat

45:19

in the middle of her show does

45:21

what all rappers do, points

45:23

at someone in the crowd and goes, now you rap. Now

45:27

it's your turn. In her

45:29

defense, it wasn't just anyone she

45:31

pointed to. Right, it was him.

45:33

It was a seven-foot-six-tall man. With

45:35

a giant boobox, yeah. And

45:38

then he took that lead. And

45:40

overnight, first of all, everyone wants his

45:42

autograph after that performance. They want his

45:44

autograph. And he becomes Class

45:47

K immediately. They call him

45:49

Class K. Wait, I didn't catch

45:51

that. What was that? That's the second that

45:53

he's performing, because them is called Class K.

45:55

That's his rap name. He

45:57

doesn't go by K-Zam. Cuz

46:02

Am would have been a great rap name. What? What

46:05

are you telling me? You're saying

46:08

he's like, okay, here I am, Cuz Am. Now

46:10

I'm a rapper, I guess I gotta come up with a rap

46:12

name. Your name is like this. I can't

46:15

use Cuz Am, that's just my normal

46:17

name. It

46:19

has a boy and a Z in

46:21

it. I

46:24

am thinking about the movie. There are so many plots

46:26

and I feel like it's a good movie. His rap

46:28

name is Gary. That's

46:31

the only way it would make sense. If

46:34

his rap name was like Gary Smith. I

46:38

was thinking there are so many

46:40

plots in this, watching that movie Timecode, because

46:42

I feel like I've checked out of certain

46:44

ones. There's one whole plot of the club

46:47

owner, Cuz Am and the girl, that's

46:49

going on in the limo in their night because I

46:51

think he's orchestrating Cuz Am's career. Then

46:53

there's another plot. He wants Cuz Am,

46:56

oh sorry, he wants it later. He

46:58

wants to make more than Michelin. He

47:01

wanted, when he did the Nubian Eyeballs,

47:03

he wanted his rapper, right? He was on, remember he

47:05

says like, everyone has a secret, your job is

47:07

to find out his secret. He was on to him. Cuz

47:11

Am at the boom

47:13

box, a little glow diamond, he had

47:15

a table and he kept trying to

47:18

catch it. And then he's like,

47:20

I got it. No, there's nothing there.

47:23

And then he's like, that guy seems

47:25

to be able to admit imaginary diamonds,

47:28

so I should become his friend by feeding

47:30

him Godeyeballs. Nubian

47:33

Godeyeballs. And

47:35

is he dating the lady? Well that's another

47:37

plot one that seems very underdeveloped. Well she has

47:39

an interesting journey because all of

47:42

a sudden out of nowhere, she

47:44

seems to really care about Mac.

47:46

Yeah. Yes. Oh yeah. And

47:49

then at the end when she's,

47:52

spoiler alert, when they're walking away,

47:54

Cuz Am, and he's

47:56

like, I haven't worked in 5,000 years. He's

47:59

like, well you better get used to it. Like I'm like,

48:01

well is she also a genie? Because

48:04

she says you don't get it. You don't have control

48:06

here. Like she seems to be in the know Right,

48:09

and maybe he was totally upfront with her Gin

48:14

does the app to work cuz in the ginger's be like

48:16

give me a million dollars and eat a habit No,

48:19

cuz she's telling him you're getting a job So

48:22

is he a human being at the art? I

48:25

don't know You know, he

48:27

was giving up all of his power. You know,

48:29

he did you know why cuz he got married

48:36

That's what it felt like Oh

49:00

My god, I am single I Feel

49:05

like I feel like we should get into the

49:07

audience here and see what

49:10

questions the audience has You're

49:12

keeping track Jason has no

49:14

children married

49:18

All right questions here from the

49:20

audience your name what you

49:23

would name Kazam as a

49:25

rapper and your question. I Have

49:28

no idea. I think

49:30

class K is pretty good. Okay great

49:33

My name is Sarah Did anybody

49:35

else notice during one of the

49:38

scenes when Kazam is talking to max? He

49:40

mentions that Jesus is basically a genie.

49:42

Oh I

49:44

do remember that now It

49:48

was so shocking and another biblical character

49:50

who I don't remember but he said

49:52

Jesus is a genie. Yeah Wow

49:58

This kid's movie got dark Yeah,

50:03

so I guess Shaq really

50:05

is breaking it down early on.

50:07

Okay, yes. It's like one of

50:09

the wishes was to turn water

50:11

into wine and he's like,

50:14

I can do that. And

50:16

somebody was like, oh, I wish Lazarus was

50:18

still alive. And he's like, done. Bingo.

50:22

Well, for pointing out that fact, I'm going to give you this

50:24

great book that I really love. It's

50:26

called The Great Showdown's The Revenge by Scott C. I

50:28

wrote the introduction to it, it's really awesome, he's amazing.

50:31

It's really good to get that book. All right, you sir, what do

50:34

you got? Your name, your Kazan name.

50:36

What do you think the dad does? Oh yeah, that's good too. Your

50:38

name, what do you think the dad does? Okay,

50:42

and your question. What

50:44

do you think the dad does? My

50:47

name's Rob. I think the dad

50:49

just runs a warehouse party day in

50:51

and day out. They

50:54

show up in the middle of the day and that's when Debrat's

50:56

there. That's true, it's daytime. Well, it

50:58

was the 90s, so it was different. True.

51:03

So late in the movie, Max kind of

51:05

has a breakdown. He's really upset about everything

51:07

and he's like, I'm going to show them

51:09

all, I'm going to show them all. Like,

51:11

maybe I'll become a personal assistant. I

51:13

heard that. Max

51:19

says, I heard

51:21

that. Oh, it was amazing.

51:24

Yeah, that was a weird moment because

51:27

Jaquille at that point became an image

51:29

on the ceiling, like a

51:31

constellation on the ceiling and was

51:33

talking to him as a two-dimensional,

51:35

a one-dimensional person. The only

51:37

thing I can, I don't know, come up with

51:40

is that the dad had a personal assistant who

51:42

he also seemed to beat up from time to

51:44

time, but who seemed sort of like a son

51:46

figure to him. So I don't know, maybe he

51:48

just thought that was a job that was open

51:51

and he were close

51:53

to this father. Everyone knows the

51:55

power is the personal assistant to

51:57

the biggest. They know everything. Yeah,

51:59

exactly. All right, sir,

52:01

what do you think the dad does, your name and your question?

52:04

Brad, I think the dad, I agree

52:07

the dad's like a talent

52:09

relation guy. In

52:11

observation, the friend, the make

52:14

a face friend, that's the director's son. Oh!

52:18

Oh! Well, well, well. I like that.

52:21

By the way, his son wasn't good enough to actually get the

52:23

bigger part of Max. So

52:30

at the very end of the credits,

52:32

it says it's dedicated to three people.

52:35

Is this somebody? Somebody? I

52:37

didn't look it up or anything if they were his children,

52:39

but I just started to think I was like, if I

52:41

was his child, I'd

52:43

be like, it's okay. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

52:46

Don't waste your time on this one. You don't

52:48

have to dedicate this to me. You

52:52

guys seem like you have a partnership here that you need this

52:54

in front of... No. All right,

52:56

quick thing. All right, quick thing. Touch

52:59

my hand on the mic. I'll hold the mic to

53:01

your face. You talk into it. Those

53:04

bullies sodomize him with a key. And

53:06

it... What? Oh, right. They

53:09

said they'll put the key up his ass, right? Where

53:12

it will only fit. When he comes home,

53:14

he doesn't have any bruises, so all they

53:17

did was sodomize him with the key.

53:20

Well, he has a little bit on his face because

53:22

his mother's like, what happened to your face? What

53:24

happened to you? But I think makeup was not,

53:26

again... Yeah, they're not... Shaq

53:29

is a sweaty mess. They couldn't do any... Do

53:32

you think his butt is a safe?

53:38

By the way, there was

53:41

something about Max that I loved too,

53:43

which is like, his mom's like, have

53:45

this OJ. He's like, ew. What kid

53:47

doesn't like OJ? Like,

53:50

he's like, I need these pancakes or waffles.

53:52

He's like, ew. It's not like

53:54

his mom was trying to feed him health food. It

53:56

was like, he's like the most kid-friendly

53:58

food. We didn't even talk... about that scene

54:00

how they ate the French toast behind the

54:03

mom's back. The

54:05

flying French toast. And

54:08

then he had to make more. The kid won't eat it so he

54:11

makes the French toast fly into

54:13

his mouth in one whole bite

54:15

and almost killed, I mean I feel like the

54:18

mom's... That was a deadly serving. How

54:22

about when the bad guy, when the main bad

54:24

guy is like you're gonna do what I want

54:26

or maybe he's gonna wake up dead. What?

54:33

I get it, you are foreign and the

54:35

villain but what

54:37

people are dead by definition that means they do

54:39

not wake up. Alright

54:42

ma'am your name, your

54:44

Kazam rap name if you have one

54:47

and your question. Hi my name is

54:50

Julia and my Kazam

54:52

rap name would be Shaquille

54:54

O'Neal. Did

54:56

you write that down or are you just consulting your notes?

54:58

I'm making it. She does

55:00

have a lot of notes and I'm very happy about

55:02

this. I know how you like your notes. Okay

55:05

I'd like to turn this around onto the panel.

55:08

When it comes to sharing a race car

55:10

twin size bed with Shaquille O'Neal would

55:12

you prefer to be big or little spoon?

55:16

Wow amazing question you're gonna get one of these great

55:18

showdown books too. I would

55:20

like somebody to start a tumblr where

55:23

all of you can just post images

55:25

of your notes for these movies. I

55:32

would like to be, wait wait which is

55:34

big and which is little? Would

55:36

you like to be spooned or spoon? I

55:38

would like to be spooned. I always like

55:43

to be big spooned. Wait

55:45

which is big? Big spoon is the

55:47

one who is doing this for me.

55:49

I like to be spooned. Hey what's

55:51

happening? Guys,

56:01

spoon for us right now. Guys,

56:04

let's take a poll and everybody in

56:06

the room split up by preference of

56:08

spooning. Left hand side

56:10

of the room, spoonies, and

56:13

then we're all going to run at each other. Whoever

56:17

we spoon with is remaded

56:19

for life. Let's

56:22

just make this decision now and not

56:24

look back. Okay,

56:27

where do you fall? Spoonie or spooner? I

56:30

like to spoon the person and for

56:32

10 seconds I'd be done. I actually

56:34

think it's interesting. I think most men

56:36

like to be spooned and

56:38

I think most women like to do the spooning.

56:40

Paul? Okay, well I'm agreeing

56:43

with June. If there's a Shaquille Neil in

56:45

my bed, I would want

56:47

him to envelop me in every way.

56:52

I want to be the little spoon

56:54

to Shaquille's big spoon. Scoop

56:56

me up. Scoop

56:59

me away in that race car bed to Dreamland.

57:05

Never end. All right, who

57:07

else has a good question? You have a great question.

57:09

I have to tell you. All right, your name, your

57:11

Shaquille Neil rap name and your question. My

57:13

name's Latoya. I have a really tasteful name,

57:15

Magic K, it's pretty two point. I

57:19

have one point to make and then my question, it

57:21

wasn't just the brat performing, it was Salt and

57:23

Pepper Spinderella. Okay, very good point. Yes. Very

57:26

good point. Thank you. And that's why

57:28

it would probably be worth a million dollars. Maybe

57:31

it was a collab. That doesn't often

57:33

happen. Not a cool half a mil

57:35

normal Debrat show. No. It started

57:37

as 50,000. I

57:39

remember hearing 50,000, don't lose this tape,

57:42

50,000 and then other

57:44

genie was like it's worth a million dollars.

57:47

That's a big jump. That's a huge jump. All right,

57:49

your question. When you have the N in Salt and

57:51

Pepper then you do that. Yeah, that is big. Well

57:54

my question is, if you could recast

57:56

Shaq with another 90s basketball player, who would it

57:58

be? obviously.

58:02

Dennis Rodman as the genie. Who

58:04

else? All right so 90 basketball

58:06

player. Well I would go, who

58:08

played Grandma Ma? Who is the Grandma Ma

58:10

guy? Larry Jones. Carl

58:12

Malone. Oh no it's easy.

58:14

Larry Bird. Done

58:21

and done. Larry Bird.

58:25

Don't change a line of dialogue.

58:29

I am here to say I will give

58:31

Larry Bird 500,000 dollars to do a shot for shot

58:33

remake of Kazam. And

58:42

I want the kid who played Max, no matter

58:44

how old he is now, to

58:46

play Max. I

58:49

would say Muggsy Buggs because Muggsy Buggs is

58:51

probably smaller than Max in size. So I

58:53

think it would be the reverse where Max

58:55

would be the big and then Muggsy Buggs

58:57

would be a small. All

59:00

right so that's a good question in the back. All

59:02

right yes your name, your check, rap name and your

59:04

question. My name's Jake, I

59:06

would be Kazant. All

59:09

right I felt it felt, yeah

59:11

you can't rap. Okay

59:14

I just I was wondering if

59:16

anybody else picked up when Sam goes to

59:18

his, to

59:21

meet up with his dad. He goes

59:23

into that party, the woman that ends up dating,

59:25

I'm sorry Max, thank you. Bro,

59:27

get it together. The

59:31

woman that Shaq ends

59:33

up dating does like a

59:35

lock eye with him and

59:37

like straight up like he's like wants to

59:39

fuck him. Who the

59:41

dad? You go to a POV shot and they're like

59:45

this is whoever she is and she is

59:47

straight up just, so she's, I'm

59:49

just I'm wondering maybe that's

59:53

why she cares so much about him later. Because

59:56

it's a sexual and intense sexual

59:58

attraction. Max is her

1:00:00

son? Oh wait, you

1:00:03

say he did to Max, so that's your child. Max, so do

1:00:05

you say to Max? No, Max is dad I think. Wait,

1:00:08

who are you saying? He's saying

1:00:10

that the woman that's killing the offensive

1:00:12

kid, she looks at him like she

1:00:14

wants to fuck the kids. No, I

1:00:16

did not. I think you misread

1:00:18

that. I think

1:00:20

you misread that. Hey guy, I think that says

1:00:22

more about you than about

1:00:24

the movie. We're

1:00:27

going to do a quick palate cleanser here,

1:00:29

ma'am. Your name, your rap

1:00:31

name for Shaquille and your question. My

1:00:34

name is Liz. Can I say what I think the dad

1:00:36

does? Yeah, of course. I think whatever it is, it's the

1:00:38

same job that Mariah Carey's boyfriend did

1:00:40

in Glitter. Oh, that's a good

1:00:42

call. And so I was wondering, if

1:00:44

he's been away for either 3,000 or 5,000 years because I heard both,

1:00:49

how does he know who Thomas Jefferson is, let

1:00:52

alone Jesus? Yeah, and he talks about Elvis

1:00:54

I think at one point too, or John Wayne.

1:00:56

He definitely mentions those two. Yeah, that's

1:00:58

a mystery. I wonder if

1:01:01

learning goes on in the bottle. Yeah,

1:01:03

how much knowledge is there? I mean

1:01:05

the boom box had a radio. Let

1:01:11

me see, that's a good question. Yeah,

1:01:13

I'm still curious about what's inside that

1:01:15

genie bottle in general. He

1:01:18

doesn't seem to talk about it like it's an

1:01:21

awful exhibit. And I'm also trying to remember,

1:01:23

when genies get out of their lamp, do they

1:01:25

need to then carry the lamps around with them?

1:01:29

I don't think so. Only if they're going back into

1:01:31

it and need it. I do think they need to

1:01:33

know where it is. At all times. Probably.

1:01:38

What I forgot, normally when you see the bottle, the

1:01:40

bottle is like this

1:01:42

big. Yeah. And Shaq's was...

1:01:46

Shaq's was a big bottle. Well

1:01:48

Shaq, as evidenced in the movie, is an

1:01:51

incredibly tall man. He

1:01:55

doesn't stick out at all. He could definitely put

1:01:58

him in perspective with a child in bed. head.

1:02:02

All right.

1:02:04

I was wondering if they ever made one

1:02:06

of those shack things you could stand up

1:02:08

against in your house to measure how tall

1:02:10

you are. And that's kind of what this

1:02:12

whole movie is. Yeah. All right.

1:02:15

Sir, your name, your Shaquille O'Neal rap name

1:02:17

and your question. My name

1:02:19

is Micah. Shaquille O'Neal rap

1:02:21

name would probably be MC something because

1:02:23

of the 90s. Okay. And.

1:02:26

Half an answer. MC something. I believe that

1:02:28

the father was the talent booker for the

1:02:30

club. And then his other job was pirating

1:02:32

the CDs and the $50,000 figure that came

1:02:36

up was the club owner was saying, you

1:02:38

know, we have $50,000 worth of CD blanks coming in

1:02:42

today. And I need

1:02:44

you to make the count of it because

1:02:46

then they will be worth a million dollars.

1:02:48

Are you here? Wow. It's other TV.

1:02:51

It's other TV. I got to get

1:02:54

back a book. That is

1:02:58

a lot of questions. Thank you. I like

1:03:00

that they're treating it like it's counterfeit

1:03:02

money. Like you need plates to

1:03:05

make the CDs. Like we have to get the

1:03:07

plates. So they can $50,000

1:03:09

worth of blank CDs. That's a lot.

1:03:11

You're investing a lot in this. The

1:03:14

Brack concert. Ridiculous. Is that your

1:03:16

question or just your justification? Because I don't want to cut you off

1:03:18

because you already had to. All right. Wow.

1:03:20

You gave an answer more

1:03:22

than I could. Great restraint.

1:03:24

Nailed that free throw unlike

1:03:26

Shaquille and then walked away.

1:03:30

Who believes in themselves? Here we go. Your

1:03:33

name, Shaquille rap name and question. My

1:03:35

name is free and my name is

1:03:38

genie and juice. Nice.

1:03:41

So as you guys pointed out, Max fell through

1:03:44

an extraordinary amount of floors.

1:03:47

So I'm wondering, is it possible

1:03:49

that he was fatally wounded and

1:03:52

the rest of the movie is a Jacob ladder. I

1:04:00

see where you're going. I see

1:04:02

where you're going. So you're saying the only

1:04:04

part of the movie that is real is

1:04:06

the initial meeting with the bullies in which

1:04:08

he goes into the abandoned house, he falls

1:04:10

through all the floors, and the rest of

1:04:12

the movie is the last few moments of

1:04:14

his life ebbing out of

1:04:17

his body and he's imagining that

1:04:19

whole rest of the movie. If

1:04:21

that were the case, he's mentally

1:04:24

insane. Five stars. Five stars. What

1:04:28

if, I'm going to pause it one more theory,

1:04:30

how about the second time he falls down the

1:04:32

elevator shaft, the end is

1:04:34

the Jacob ladder scenario, which is he lived

1:04:36

the entire thing, but he never came out

1:04:38

of it. He only imagined Jaquille getting free

1:04:40

and the life and everything like that. That

1:04:43

would justify it. Ooh, that would be amazing.

1:04:46

When he falls the second time,

1:04:48

because I really do think he's

1:04:50

a genie, the other guy, they

1:04:53

don't touch him, right? He just kind of is like,

1:04:56

whoa. Was he running backwards or something like that? What

1:04:58

happened? He throws him off of- Doesn't he hit him

1:05:00

with the boom bow? No, you're right. He did throw

1:05:03

him. He throws him. I think he tossed him. Oh,

1:05:05

he hit him with the boom box. Or something like that. I thought

1:05:07

he tossed him right off. Did he toss him?

1:05:09

I had him in his head. Did he toss him, audience? Yes.

1:05:12

What, he tossed him right off there? I

1:05:14

do remember him tossing him, yeah. Well, that

1:05:16

kid should have better balance. Okay. Where else?

1:05:19

Yeah. Okay, this guy. How does the kid keep

1:05:21

getting into the club? Wait,

1:05:24

wait. That kid should not be allowed in that

1:05:26

club. That kid needs to go everywhere. And

1:05:28

he's gone all night. His mom's like, don't

1:05:30

do that again. He's like the

1:05:32

king of New York City. Yeah. And

1:05:35

then those bullies are trying to get in the club too.

1:05:38

And even when he's trying to be cool in front of those

1:05:40

bullies, they don't believe he had that- that he had the lanyard,

1:05:42

right? They're like, that's bullshit. You don't have that.

1:05:45

Like, yeah, he's wearing it. Like,

1:05:47

there's nothing in this movie that makes sense. Like,

1:05:49

they're like, at that point, the bullies should be

1:05:51

like, whoa, cool. You got into the club. No.

1:05:54

They're like, fuck you. There's seven of a T up

1:05:56

your ass. Rough

1:05:58

neighborhood. Oh yeah. the beginning I forgot about

1:06:01

this. Doesn't he tell the boys like there's gold

1:06:03

in a locker? Yeah, and he lied to him

1:06:05

so that made him real mad. Alright

1:06:07

sir, your name, your Shaquille rap name

1:06:10

or father's profession in your question? My

1:06:12

name is Walker. I think his rap name should

1:06:14

be Special K. Nice.

1:06:17

Clean. Because

1:06:19

listening to him makes you pass out?

1:06:24

Well my question is, so it not only did

1:06:26

Starsky direct the movie, but he also did the

1:06:28

story. So do you think that he's plugging away

1:06:30

on Starsky and Hutch like I got this great

1:06:32

idea with Wilt Chamberlain. It's gonna be, I just

1:06:34

gotta let this grow for a little while. And

1:06:37

he finally got the cache in Hollywood to get this

1:06:39

made. Just like 30 years later. Just

1:06:44

pull out that old Wilt Chamberlain script. I

1:06:50

bet it's kind of funny to think that that was

1:06:52

his like dream project.

1:06:57

At the very beginning, I gotta say, I kind

1:06:59

of in the first 20 minutes, I was

1:07:01

like, I'm really digging this movie. I was

1:07:03

like, it kind of feels like Goonies. I

1:07:07

mean I wasn't like so sold on Max,

1:07:09

but I was like, it wasn't until Kazam

1:07:11

shows up and I was like, no, I'm

1:07:13

done. Well I agree

1:07:15

because I think the basic conceit of it,

1:07:18

like the idea that a child could have

1:07:20

a genie, could own a genie, that

1:07:22

could grant wishes is a fun

1:07:25

idea for kids to see. But he

1:07:27

doesn't use it for any of the problems that

1:07:29

they really established in the first 10 minutes. He's

1:07:32

like, I wish those bullies get embarrassed. Doesn't do

1:07:34

it for that. Doesn't use it for being cool. But

1:07:37

you know Starsky was just like, I got

1:07:41

Shaquille. Like I got Shaquille and Neil

1:07:43

in this movie. Like this is gonna be the best thing I ever

1:07:45

do in my whole career. And then Shaquille was like, oh, I need

1:07:47

to rap in the movie. And he

1:07:49

was like, fuck. You

1:07:53

need to what now? I

1:07:56

wonder if Starsky is a divorced dad.

1:08:00

writing this as like

1:08:02

from his perspective to his jit. Like

1:08:06

yeah, there are some things I need to make

1:08:09

amends for but I did it, I did it

1:08:11

for you and I made some mistakes and you

1:08:13

know what I- Sure I got involved in some

1:08:15

shady showbiz shit. But

1:08:18

I'm back on track now. All

1:08:21

right sir, your name, your skill, and your rap name and

1:08:23

your question, go ahead. My name's John, I refuse

1:08:25

to give him a name because he's so bad, I would just

1:08:28

encourage him to rap more. I

1:08:30

got quick comment and a question. Starsky

1:08:32

never directed again because of how bad this movie was.

1:08:36

Arguably. Yes. One

1:08:38

of the 50 million times Max asked for his

1:08:40

parents to get back together, Shaq's like I can't

1:08:42

do that, only jins can do that because they

1:08:45

believe in fairy tales, I don't believe in fairy

1:08:47

tales. But in the end, what is the fairy

1:08:49

tale in Max being dead and then him like being sad about

1:08:51

it? Like why does he become gin now? Mo,

1:08:55

I'll have to all think about that. We're

1:08:59

stymied. You

1:09:01

did it, you did it, you stumped us.

1:09:06

I was, did you guys think this, I

1:09:08

did think that the ending was going to

1:09:10

be, like I thought this would be the biggest fuck

1:09:12

you ending, like it should be like his parents

1:09:14

to get back together? Like I thought

1:09:16

like, and then that step that would

1:09:19

just disappear? No, instead what happens, which

1:09:21

is insanity, which is

1:09:23

in the chase in the

1:09:25

warehouse where they're making the fake CDs, which

1:09:28

is in the basement of the club, there's

1:09:30

a fire, the whole club gets on fire,

1:09:32

blah, blah, blah, blah. The kid, once again,

1:09:34

a corpse at the bottom

1:09:36

of an elevator shaft is

1:09:39

brought back to life by Shaq, become going from

1:09:41

genie to gin. Travis,

1:09:43

his stepfather, picks him up, scoops

1:09:46

the kid up, runs out with

1:09:48

him. That's not really, if

1:09:51

I could amend what you're saying. He actually,

1:09:53

he catches it. Sorry, you're right. Makes

1:09:55

it look like Travis saved Mac because you

1:09:57

can't let it know that it's cuz they.

1:10:00

who did it. So Travis is the

1:10:02

best, again I contend, the best

1:10:04

greatest guy in the whole world. He goes

1:10:06

outside, he goes outside, right, and

1:10:09

all fine and he's the fireman and that's all

1:10:11

good and they're like putting out fires and he

1:10:13

like, his dad comes

1:10:15

up gets a second chance and we

1:10:17

get the, Max is like, yeah you

1:10:20

can come to Travis who just saved my

1:10:22

life. So he says, Travis, a

1:10:25

fireman walks away from an active

1:10:27

fire. He does fire. Okay, Max,

1:10:29

this movie

1:10:34

exists in a world in where

1:10:36

Max is almost omnipotent over

1:10:38

all adults. He's like, Travis, are

1:10:41

you coming? Travis is like, uh,

1:10:44

fuck it. There's like a lot

1:10:46

of fire still. There's a lot

1:10:48

of fire. He

1:10:51

is going AWOL from his

1:10:53

job. It takes

1:10:56

him a really long time to get the

1:10:58

blanket too. Like she's like, the mom's like,

1:11:00

can you get him a blanket? It's like

1:11:02

a really long scene. And they're like, Travis,

1:11:04

where the fuck were you? He's like, you

1:11:06

don't understand. The kid finally wanted me there.

1:11:09

I just saw something here that took me in a

1:11:12

little detour. I wish I was more research. So

1:11:14

Paul Michael Glaser, the director of this,

1:11:16

directed the movie Running Man with Arnold

1:11:19

Schwarzenegger, obviously a huge hit, which I

1:11:21

would like to do on the show. But he

1:11:23

also directed the air up there.

1:11:25

A movie about another

1:11:27

large basketball player with Kevin Bacon,

1:11:29

where Kevin Bacon, it was just

1:11:32

this guy, this giant guy. He

1:11:34

did direct again. Well, this

1:11:36

is before this is like it's a

1:11:38

running man in the air up there.

1:11:40

He was Charles, Ashley Kona, Myana, and

1:11:43

he played Celia. So basically

1:11:45

a college basketball coach, Kevin Bacon goes to

1:11:47

Africa to find the next big thing. And

1:11:50

the poster is, you can't see

1:11:52

it, it's that far away, but it's a

1:11:54

very tall man with a very small man. So

1:11:57

I think maybe that was like his like, sing. like

1:12:00

he liked it like maybe you might

1:12:02

even call it a fetish i'm

1:12:06

pretty amazed at that uh...

1:12:08

okay uh... so that uh... that

1:12:10

that obviously we had an opinion about the movie but

1:12:12

there are other people out there that had a different

1:12:14

opinion is now time second

1:12:17

opinion as

1:12:21

always we come to you the audience to thing

1:12:24

the theme if someone out there has a theme

1:12:26

ready to go out run to you but if

1:12:28

not you have to all sing it again so

1:12:30

anyone have a theme ready to go anyone ready

1:12:32

to sing it by themselves going once

1:12:34

going twice all right everyone sing your

1:12:36

best rendition your own lyrics of the

1:12:38

second opinion team go all

1:12:49

right that's our second opinion theme you think you

1:12:52

guys would have rehearsed a little before the show

1:12:55

that was terrible these

1:12:58

are a second opinion cold from amazon

1:13:00

five-star reviews uh... they're all pretty short

1:13:02

but uh... i think you're this is

1:13:05

a this is by uh... mark before

1:13:08

uh... written in may of two thousand

1:13:10

fifteen simply

1:13:15

that three

1:13:17

words genie

1:13:20

movie and

1:13:25

genie is felt here like j

1:13:28

a and

1:13:30

i a like you

1:13:32

know carter that

1:13:35

is uh... but uh...

1:13:38

this is the one that i really like to

1:13:40

hear uh... okay all right

1:13:42

so uh... this

1:13:45

one is five stars by jeff

1:13:47

gone shack

1:13:50

diesel aka shakilo neil has

1:13:52

done what few professional athletes

1:13:54

have ever accomplished successfully

1:13:56

crossed over to the big big screen

1:13:58

i like the cover of the movie

1:14:01

still have yet to see the whole thing

1:14:06

but not because I didn't want to watch

1:14:08

it I just keep on

1:14:10

getting interrupted and

1:14:13

I'm starting to get a little frustrated

1:14:19

frustrated at the movie and himself

1:14:22

I feel like Shaq really likes

1:14:24

kids which is fun and I'm

1:14:27

sure this movie is fun too

1:14:29

five stars we're

1:14:35

doctor we're gonna need you back in surgery

1:14:37

right now are you serious I

1:14:44

want anybody let me finish this this

1:14:50

one is a very long one but I

1:14:53

want to just read oh man

1:14:56

all right this one I just want to read this

1:14:58

middle of it it goes it says does every movie

1:15:00

have to be this is what it's titled does every

1:15:02

movie have to be war and peace by

1:15:06

the autistic werewolf written

1:15:13

December 10th 2003 come

1:15:16

on people lighten up this movie

1:15:18

was meant to be fun nothing

1:15:20

else cuz am has

1:15:22

a cute little message of a children's

1:15:24

hope sustained in the midst of adversity

1:15:26

by a special friend and a message

1:15:28

delivered rather well cuz a

1:15:30

bad singing it's

1:15:33

just a fun is just a fun

1:15:38

remember it's one of those

1:15:40

hey genie dude don't quit your day job things

1:15:42

I'm an adult and I love this movie Shaquille

1:15:45

did a great job in it

1:15:47

Shaq gave a genie a wild

1:15:49

special turban flavor compassion and dignity

1:15:51

that's way different from all those

1:15:53

traditional genie depictions that I found

1:15:55

refreshing Shaq

1:15:57

was a hood genie everyone in the

1:15:59

hood Thanks, they're the next Ghetto

1:16:01

M.I.A. Ghetto,

1:16:04

I am a cool dude rap

1:16:06

star. Sorry, I read it wrong.

1:16:11

A hood genie living in a boombox would

1:16:13

not logically be any different from all the

1:16:15

rest of the rap star wannabes, hence the

1:16:17

movie keeps to its urban theme. Kazam's

1:16:23

for kids or the adults who've managed to

1:16:25

remain a kid at heart. Anyone

1:16:27

else who has done more than just grow up, they've

1:16:30

gotten old in the worst context.

1:16:34

There's no more fun inside of you, there's

1:16:36

no more connection to the joys and the

1:16:38

pains of youth that this movie taps into.

1:16:41

If your heart is still young, you'll

1:16:43

love Kazam. If not, I pity you.

1:16:49

And then goes, T.S. Amazon

1:16:52

sells a lot of high-tone movies too, by

1:16:54

the way. I bought a few in my

1:16:56

time, go for it. I don't know what

1:16:59

that means. Five stars. Do

1:17:01

you think that's

1:17:05

just a normal guy all

1:17:07

the time and then Full Moon comes

1:17:09

out autistic

1:17:12

werewolf? Or

1:17:14

is he an autistic guy all the

1:17:16

time, Full Moon, werewolf? We'll

1:17:19

never know. We'll never know. They're

1:17:22

the only right in the Full Moon. So

1:17:26

would you recommend watching this movie? I would say

1:17:29

yes. Would you say yes? Sort of. For

1:17:31

the rap alone, Jason, come on.

1:17:34

I would maybe speed through. I

1:17:36

would maybe fast forward during some

1:17:38

stuff. It's tedious. I

1:17:41

mean, watch the kid

1:17:44

die for sure. To

1:17:49

me, he's definitely, Shaquille

1:17:51

is very charming. I think so too. I

1:17:54

actually, having seen now two Shaquille O'Neal

1:17:56

films today, I... I

1:18:01

feel I can say with confidence. I think

1:18:03

he's doing a great job as an actor

1:18:05

and I think he has

1:18:08

some Charisma that

1:18:10

is coming through really. I'm not gonna

1:18:12

like shit on Shaquille O'Neal. I will say

1:18:14

that his go-to is yelling Yeah,

1:18:16

but I think he was trying to be like

1:18:19

powerful So his

1:18:21

present like imposing and yeah Jeannie

1:18:24

if you were to compare him to other athletes

1:18:26

and how they would have done I think he

1:18:28

like wins an offer a athletic

1:18:32

performance There's a

1:18:34

reason why Shaquille O'Neal has been in like four

1:18:36

or five movies. Yeah, I think he does have

1:18:38

it I mean now meanwhile, I was like reason

1:18:40

why Shaquille O'Neal has been in four or five

1:18:42

movies Would

1:18:45

be a lot of commercials. Would you

1:18:47

see? yelming in this

1:18:49

movie Would that

1:18:51

be the new version? I wouldn't I wouldn't want

1:18:53

to see ya know, she killed and carry it.

1:18:55

Yeah. Yeah Yeah,

1:18:58

okay I was

1:19:00

gonna ask you yummy But

1:19:03

I think I know it Okay,

1:19:06

well Before we go

1:19:08

before we go. I'm gonna play one more rap, but

1:19:10

what do we have to plug K? You're

1:19:12

an amazing writer and now a director.

1:19:14

What do you what do you want to plug? What do you

1:19:16

want to tell people about to see or watch? Watch

1:19:21

cuz they I wrote it guys I

1:19:27

Pish for victory is coming out In

1:19:31

a year and a half or whatever so that's Year

1:19:38

and a half we're gonna be like Oh Kay was

1:19:40

plugging this a year and a half ago on

1:19:42

that up it we gotta go see it Has

1:19:45

that even begun production on it? No. All right,

1:19:47

great I Go

1:19:50

baby, but I just been in the

1:19:53

first draft today actually Amazing

1:19:57

it's terrible right now It's

1:20:01

a singing movie so is there a part for

1:20:03

Shaquille? That's a great question. I can tell you

1:20:05

something. Yeah. There

1:20:09

is definitely a part for Shaquille.

1:20:11

If this brought this together in a year and

1:20:13

a half and we all go to the theater

1:20:15

and see Shaquille, we will know where this came

1:20:17

from. You guys, I'm kind of not joking. If

1:20:19

that happens, if that happens, and he's singing to

1:20:21

a crowd of people, I would like Paul June

1:20:24

and I to be in the front row of

1:20:26

that crowd. Absolutely, absolutely. By

1:20:28

the way, Shaquille was in Fresh Off the Boat. He was very good.

1:20:30

He brought the heat in Fresh Off the Boat. The

1:20:33

Miami Heat? He

1:20:35

brought the Orlando Magic. Crap.

1:20:40

It's a basketball team though, right? I don't

1:20:42

know. June, what would you...

1:20:45

You can still watch the first season

1:20:47

of Grace and Frankie on Netflix. Perfect.

1:20:50

Yeah. That's

1:20:52

it. Jason. I

1:20:54

have a very small part on a very

1:20:56

wonderful show called Transparent on

1:20:59

Amazon. Season two just

1:21:01

came out. And Kay, I'm sure

1:21:03

people can watch Pitch Perfect 2 right now

1:21:05

on iTunes, right? Oh, sure. Yeah. Check

1:21:08

that out. And Pitch Perfect 1. Sure.

1:21:10

No. But

1:21:14

you would prefer for people to

1:21:16

wait a year and a half.

1:21:18

We could not watch either. Either.

1:21:21

You understand. You're allowed to

1:21:23

talk about things from the past. Oh,

1:21:25

I did not know that. All plugs don't have to be

1:21:27

future looking. Oh, I did not know. I did not know.

1:21:30

I would like to plug, obviously, Fresh

1:21:32

Off the Boat is a fun show,

1:21:34

but also the first ever Vine series.

1:21:36

I'm the voice of White Ninja. You

1:21:38

can watch it on Vine. That's

1:21:41

a thing that happened. So

1:21:44

we did all that. And now

1:21:46

I'll say this. Shaquille, take it

1:21:49

away. Get set. Go on, my setter can't check. I see

1:21:51

what I got. It ain't about seeing what makes us work. Can you get

1:21:53

fooled over? By

1:22:02

the way, I noticed that

1:22:04

there, that somebody holds the mic, like

1:22:06

I hold the mic at this audience's

1:22:23

face, just holding the mic in front

1:22:26

of Shaquille in his face. Because he

1:22:28

has to hold the boom box, which

1:22:30

is emitting fire in a crowd. And

1:22:32

people are psyched about it. That was

1:22:34

before, uh, man, I'm not gonna

1:22:36

make a joke about that. Alright, thank

1:22:38

you guys, I didn't. I didn't.

1:22:41

I didn't. You all

1:22:43

are disgusting people. I

1:22:46

stopped. You went forward. It's

1:22:49

your fault. Big thank

1:22:51

you to everybody at Earwolf, everybody

1:22:54

here at Largo. Our interns, April Halley,

1:22:56

Mick Kiley, and Marissa Zites, thank you

1:22:58

guys so much for coming out. We

1:23:00

will do these shows again. Thank you, good night. Here

1:23:02

we go. Start

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