0:00

Life is full of personal wins, whether

0:02

it's cleaning your house, getting that dream

0:04

car, or checking off your

0:06

to-do list. Winning at life is a great

0:08

feeling. And with the State Farm Personal Price

0:10

Plan, you can keep winning when

0:13

you create an affordable price just for

0:15

you by bundling home and auto. So

0:17

give yourself a round of applause. Talk

0:20

to a State Farm agent today to learn how

0:22

you can bundle and save with the Personal Price

0:24

Plan. Like a good neighbor, State

0:26

Farm is there. Prices are based on rating

0:29

plans that vary by state. Coverage

0:31

options are selected by the customer. Availability,

0:33

amount of discounts and savings, and

0:36

eligibility vary by state. When

0:38

you're ready to pop the question, the last thing

0:40

you want to do is second guess the ring.

0:42

At bluenile.com, you can design

0:44

a one-of-a-kind ring with the ease and

0:46

convenience of shopping online. Choose your diamond

0:49

and setting. When you find the one,

0:51

you'll get it delivered right to your

0:53

door. Go to bluenile.com and use promo

0:55

code AUDIO to get $50 off your

0:58

purchase of $500 or more.

1:01

That's code AUDIO at bluenile.com

1:03

for $50 off your purchase.

1:05

bluenile.com, code AUDIO. People

1:19

of Earth, the following podcast is not

1:21

real. And to all you

1:23

Patreon subscribers out there, I've been peeking

1:25

over the questions you're submitting and let's

1:27

just say, if I was frightened

1:30

of our listeners before, I have

1:32

now been transported to a place

1:34

of absolute terror, and I've hung

1:36

out with psychic space leeches. On

1:38

that note, sit back and enjoy

1:40

the show. Hello

2:03

for the Magic Tavern, a

2:05

weekly podcast from the Magical Land of Foon. I'm

2:07

your host, Arne Meekamp. If you've never listened to

2:09

the podcast before, this is everything you need to

2:11

know. Nine years ago, I

2:13

fell through a dimensional portal behind a

2:16

Burger King in Chicago into the magical

2:18

fantastical land of Foon. Luckily, I'm still

2:20

getting a wifi signal through the dimensional

2:22

rift, and I used that to upload

2:24

a podcast recorded here in the tavern,

2:26

The Wanderlost. Finally squatting in

2:29

Cadaver Falls in the magical land

2:31

of Foon, and I'm joined as always by

2:33

my co-host, Trump the Talking Badger. 27,

2:35

28, 29, 30.

2:38

Oh, haha, yeah

2:40

baby. Were you

2:42

still working out? Yeah, just doing some whole

2:44

polls. Arne, I don't know if

2:47

you've heard, but... Whole polls? Whole

2:51

polls. What am I saying? It

2:54

sounds like you said whole polls. Whole polls. Whole

2:56

polls. Polls. Polls.

2:59

Polls. Polls. So since

3:01

last week you're just digging holes that are exactly the same

3:03

size as you and pulling yourself out of them? Yeah,

3:06

Arne. Buddy, the war has

3:08

started. I didn't

3:10

realize this, but before Mel and Mort

3:12

were thrown into the sea, the war

3:14

was not officially on. It was just

3:17

gearing up, ramping up even. Wait, so the war

3:19

of the animals hadn't started? It

3:21

had not started until Eusidor... Sort

3:24

of bubbling underneath the surface there the whole time. Yeah,

3:26

it was going to, but it just needed someone to

3:28

kind of say the word go. Or

3:31

scream let's go, as Mel did several

3:34

times. Or

3:36

let's go... He

3:39

was underwater. He was underwater, yeah. Which maybe

3:41

suggests that his bubble wasn't working, I can't

3:43

quite tell. Or maybe... Oh,

3:45

was I supposed to give them a bubble? Those

3:48

two are dead, right? Those two are dead

3:50

now. I don't know, but the

3:52

lid that Eusidor put over the sea was

3:55

broken almost immediately. Because, you

3:57

know, the seas have magical creatures

3:59

as well. I mean, you know, wizards aren't

4:01

the only magical creatures. So, Ernie,

4:04

just in case, well, you should be fine, but Ernie,

4:06

don't go outside without a buddy. Because

4:09

it could be dangerous. We don't

4:11

know if this is widespread, if this is isolated

4:13

to a certain areas in

4:16

battles, but just be careful. So

4:18

we accidentally kick-started the War of

4:20

the Analysts. No,

4:22

we made two moles dreams come true,

4:25

and they started the war. And

4:27

I shouldn't go outside without a buddy,

4:31

in case a fish tries to get me. Ernie,

4:33

you say that like they can't.

4:36

I'm just gonna stay out of the water. Ernie,

4:38

we were on a flying whale for a few weeks.

4:41

That's fair, that's fair. How many, look, it's land

4:43

versus sea versus air, right? What

4:49

are flying fish? Are they air

4:51

or sea? Well, Ernie,

4:54

I don't know. I feel silly saying this.

4:56

I thought you knew fish

4:58

fly, but it's really swimming. It's what

5:00

we call swimming. That's them flying through

5:02

the water. But what about, are there

5:04

ones that fly in the air? I

5:06

mean, I'm sure there's some. We were on a

5:08

flying whale for several weeks. Why

5:10

can't I have a buddy? Well,

5:13

you can accompany you, or I, or me, or I. I'm

5:19

in my head because of the whole pole thing. Who

5:21

am I kidding? None of us are

5:24

gonna leave the tavern anytime soon. That's

5:26

probably true. Yeah, just be careful.

5:28

Overall message, be careful. Yes, there's

5:30

much danger out in the world

5:32

right now, for even the wizards

5:34

have begun to consolidate their power,

5:37

as they prepare to take over

5:39

various lands. And now their wizard

5:41

law brings down terror and fear

5:43

upon the denizens of Foon, who

5:45

deserve a better and freer world.

5:47

Wait, hold on, use it, or

5:49

the wizard war's still going on

5:51

too? Well, it's sort of the

5:53

same deal with sort of bubbling under the surface, but

5:56

I'm sure we'll do something to get that kick started

5:58

too. They're just

6:00

consolidating power and, you know, uh, shoring

6:03

up their defenses and taking over

6:05

lands. They keep conquering areas. There

6:08

have been some skirmishes, but I wouldn't say it's

6:10

a full-out war yet. I'd say it's more of

6:12

a, like a, like a wizard pissing match. Oh,

6:15

yeah, Arnie, have you ever seen a wizard pissing match?

6:17

I mean, I've seen Usid or Piss. A

6:19

pissard match. That was better. And

6:22

that's what it's called. Oh, a pissard match?

6:24

Okay. Wait, whoa, whoa, what the fuck? Arnie,

6:27

did you... Did you just move the table?

6:29

What's going on here? Whoa, why

6:31

is the table... It's moving... Whoa! The table

6:33

is standing up and stretching. That's... This is

6:35

a... Ooh, it's not

6:37

a table. This is a knee. Arnie,

6:39

me however. Whoa! I guess I'm on

6:41

a knee. This is... Hello! Oh, shit.

6:43

This is an interesting table. Fuck me!

6:45

Okay. Shit, we're sitting beneath a very

6:48

large person. Sorry, you seemed like you were busy,

6:50

so I didn't want to, um... Oh,

6:52

no, we shouldn't be apologizing to you.

6:54

No, it's fine. I, uh, sorry, I

6:56

just heard you talking, and then I was

6:58

like, is that... Aveline? Are you Aveline? Aveline?

7:00

Do you know Aveline? Are you Aveline? No.

7:03

I don't know. Sorry, okay. People mispronounce

7:05

Arnie Kneecamp sometimes. No, no, no, I'm looking

7:07

for Aveline. You're waiting for

7:09

Aveline? How is that supposed to... I don't know, I look

7:11

pretty much the same as my poster. Are you waiting for... Are

7:14

you here for a date? Arnie. Arnie?

7:16

Oh, no. Uh, no. Oh,

7:19

maybe. Here we are. Arnie, are you on a date? Are

7:21

you using some sort of... Are you catfishing people? No.

7:23

As Aveline? No. So, the

7:25

poster that I saw, it was a flyer, really, posted

7:27

in the square, and it kind of looked like you.

7:30

So, I just wasn't sure. Oh, like me? Yes, and then I sort of...

7:32

And then I put my poster, and then sort

7:34

of in my sending stone, we sort of corresponded back and forth briefly, and

7:36

we said we were going to meet here at 8 o'clock.

7:39

Oh, gosh. Oh, I'm so... So, you're

7:41

waiting for a date. Oh. Yeah.

7:44

Yeah. You know, it's like a... What is

7:46

a date, really? Just sort of a hang.

7:48

I'm looking to hang. Sure. Meet somebody. I'm

7:50

nervous. I'm nervous. Oh,

7:53

yeah. You shouldn't be nervous. I'm

7:55

sure you have many fine qualities that... And

7:58

all you have to do... What would you say? What do you think are

8:01

my fine qualities based off of meeting me right now? Well,

8:03

you're huge Arnie Arnie in

8:05

a good way. You're just you're

8:07

very tall. You're no I

8:09

get that Are you like a

8:12

like are you like? I don't want to

8:14

finish the sentence in case I was going

8:16

to say you're easy to talk to like

8:18

you needed a very Personable and woman will

8:20

see me and they're like giant Yeah,

8:23

so I was gonna say you're very

8:25

comfortable to be around into podcast on

8:27

I think Just podcasting

8:29

on your knee. I felt like I've known you for months.

8:31

What is your name? We've been so rude. What's your name?

8:34

Oh, Garley Garley, I'm a Garley root heart

8:36

fella Navi, but you know, it's just Garley.

8:38

This is great for me Garley,

8:41

this is my good friend

8:43

Chant the shapeshifter with an eye. No

8:50

Garley Garley so sorry. I'm so sorry.

8:52

No, no, no continue please. Sorry. No,

8:54

I interrupted. No, you're very nervous I'm

8:58

sweating. Are you guys getting wet down there? That's

9:05

all right You needn't

9:07

be nervous. I think of us is like a

9:10

kind of it maybe we're like a test date

9:12

You know, we kind of get some of those,

9:14

you know jitters out by speaking to three A

9:18

wizard a badger who's actually a

9:20

shapeshifter and a man from another world Yeah,

9:22

okay If I sort of it I

9:25

don't know if it works like this if I sort of tell

9:27

you what a balloon Looks like can

9:29

you maybe like try shape-shifting into him? Do

9:32

you how do you think? Yeah, I

9:34

could do that. I mean, I think

9:37

Arnie looks just like a balloon So I'll just

9:39

turn into let me just turn into Arnie and

9:41

then we'll work from this. Okay. Yeah, that'd

9:43

be amazing Okay, so that's pretty close. But then like

9:46

Based on the drawing on the flyer. So

9:49

he's sort of like yeah, just like Arnie except

9:51

like Jaw like chiseled

9:57

And then like abs right First

14:00

drinks on me. Sure. OK. Did you send

14:02

him back like a poon rune or anything like

14:04

that? Yeah, just one. Is

14:07

that a problem? Arnie, stop trying to connect with the youth

14:10

of food. Why are you guys

14:12

making that face? Why are you guys making those faces? I

14:15

have a very withered and old face. I am over

14:17

350 years old. That's

14:20

crazy. You seem so much older than that. And

14:23

sorry, you said it's wizard. He

14:25

had a bit of a lisp there or something. Sorry?

14:28

He has a wizard old face. Yeah.

14:31

He misspoke or something. Yeah, now that I'm leaning

14:33

down and closer, I'm like, you actually don't look

14:35

that much like Aveline.

14:37

But maybe like his

14:39

great-great-grandfather or something like that. Holy

14:42

shit. Like, is someone's great-great-grandfather?

14:46

And also, now that you're leaning down, I noticed,

14:48

Garley, that you have, I thought

14:50

it was a flower, but it looks like it's

14:52

a full tree and bloom with

14:55

white leaves. That's to signify that

14:57

you are Garley? Yes. Yeah, I

14:59

said I'll be in the red

15:01

dress at the tavern. I'm

15:03

going to have a small podcast on my

15:06

foot, maybe. And you'll know me by the

15:08

tree with the white leaves on my lapel.

15:10

And I thought that that was sort of

15:13

like romantic, sort of like one of my

15:15

favorite troops, my troops

15:17

that come through when I was a kid. They did this

15:20

play a lot called Tired

15:22

in Foon. Do you remember that one? Oh,

15:25

absolutely. It's like a single father, and he's

15:28

so tired of raising his son alone. And

15:30

then he

15:32

meets a woman. Yes. What

15:35

happens from there? I usually fell asleep around

15:37

that part as well. But

15:39

yeah, but anyways, I just thought it was like that. Garley,

15:42

this is perfect. These are exactly the sorts of

15:44

conversations you're going to want to have with Aveline,

15:47

you said? Aveline, yeah. Yeah. Talk

15:50

about the theater. Talk about the arts.

15:52

Talk about the things that speak to

15:55

your soul. Share your

15:57

inner feet. feelings

16:00

and then you will learn whether this person

16:02

is worthy of your time or not. I'm

16:05

sorry, I presumed they were a person. Is

16:07

Aveline a person? Don't be mad,

16:09

they're a wizard. Oh, okay.

16:11

Don't be mad. I just said don't be mad and

16:13

all of you made a face. Well, you can't just

16:15

say don't be mad. Well,

16:17

I can say don't be mad. It's your choice to believe me or

16:19

not believe me. I am allowed to say that. I

16:22

will say I'm just mad that a wizard looks

16:24

like this. I mean, again, checking myself out in

16:26

the mirror. This is incredible. That's a sexy wizard.

16:28

I always thought a wizard just looked like old

16:30

and fucked up and shit. Hey, hey, hey. Now,

16:33

perhaps this wizard has cast a glamour on

16:35

themselves to make themselves more beautiful. Oh, like

16:38

a glamour shot. And some

16:40

wizards are beautiful. Jenlevia the Red,

16:42

my beloved. Oh, yeah. Oh.

16:45

Let's do something. Though we are

16:47

torn betwixt us, this terrible

16:49

war has come. Oh,

16:52

what tragedy has befallen me?

16:57

I'm really sorry to hear that. I kind

16:59

of get it. You sort of have like a

17:01

lost love and I sort of have a love

17:03

that can't even bloom. It seems like

17:05

I just feel like this happens to me constantly. I

17:07

feel like this is happening to me. Sorry.

17:10

I said, oh, sorry. I'm not going

17:12

to cry. Okay. Oh, no.

17:14

Here comes the tears. Okay. Oh,

17:17

yeah. Let's take a break. Let's take

17:19

a break. We'll grab the crayons and we'll be right

17:21

back. I can't breathe. I can't breathe. The tears burning

17:23

anyone else? What have you been eating? Pepper.

17:55

A Court of Thorns and Roses by

17:57

Sarah J. Mass. Right now on

17:59

the Audible app. Transport yourself to a

18:01

realm of magic and curses, all from

18:03

the comfort of your living room. As

18:05

an Audible member, you choose one title

18:07

a month to keep from their entire

18:09

catalog. New members can try Audible free

18:11

for 30 days. Visit

18:13

audible.com/WonderyPod or text WonderyPod

18:16

to 500-500. That's

18:19

audible.com/WonderyPod or text WonderyPod

18:22

to 500-500. When

18:25

it comes to protecting what matters most, your

18:27

home and the people you love, it's probably

18:30

not the best time to test out the

18:32

latest trending fad. Go with what's

18:34

tried and true. No one does it better

18:36

than a leader of the home security category,

18:38

ADT. ADT

18:40

systems now feature Google Nest products to

18:43

help keep your home safer and smarter.

18:45

Check in on your home and manage

18:47

your security system from virtually anywhere. Their

18:50

latest technology features everything from motion

18:52

sensors to Google Nest cams and

18:55

Nest doorbells, with no long-term contracts

18:57

for self-setup systems. You can get

18:59

intelligent alerts customized to your daily

19:02

routine. With tailored packages

19:04

or build-your-own options, ADT makes it

19:06

easy to install their smart home

19:08

security system. Leave it up

19:11

to the ADT pros or do

19:13

it yourself. No heavy-duty tools needed.

19:15

Protecting your home shouldn't be complicated,

19:17

and ADT makes finding that peace

19:19

of mind simple. When the most

19:21

trusted name in home security adds

19:23

the intelligence of Google, you've got

19:25

a home with no worries. Go

19:27

to adt.com today or call 1-800-ADT-ASAP.

19:33

Google and Nest Cam are trademarks of Google

19:35

LLC. ADT. Brilliantly

19:38

safe. Okay,

19:42

Garlie, so I'm sitting across from you. I look

19:44

exactly like Avalon? Avali? Yeah,

19:48

I'm sorry it took so long to get the booster

19:51

for the seat. Oh, Garlie, you know what? That could be it. I

19:55

know a lot of wizards can be super-nice, but I'm not

19:57

sure I'm the only one. their

20:00

head super self-conscious about

20:02

dating someone who's taller than them.

20:04

Yes. Yes. Constantly. And I like, I like

20:06

wizards. Sorry. I like wizards. You know what

20:08

I mean? And so that's just sort of

20:11

like what I go after typically. Yeah.

20:13

Just a little tone deaf for what's going

20:15

on currently. It's to like

20:17

wizards. You promised that you weren't going to

20:19

judge me. I never

20:22

did though. From how I remember you explicitly said,

20:24

I promise I will not say a single word

20:26

and I'm going to be so quiet. That

20:28

was how I remember that conversation going. I

20:30

will. I'll climb down. Yeah.

20:32

I've really been in her ear this whole time. How's

20:35

it going up there, Arnie? Well, you know,

20:37

it's just a classic trying to help someone

20:39

out to prepare for their date sort of

20:42

thing. But yeah, it's not, it's worse than

20:44

her just liking this one super

20:46

hot wizard. She's

20:48

into wizards in general. Arnie, which wizard could

20:50

this be? For wizards are

20:53

born into this world and fully formed.

20:55

They're not like magicians or sorcerers who

20:57

learn magic. We are magic incarnate.

20:59

Who could it be? Is

21:02

there like a sexy, like the wizard

21:04

of sexy and dating?

21:08

You're looking at him. Garly,

21:10

I just want to apologize for my friend. I

21:12

saw him climb down from your shoulder, slide

21:15

down your shoulder all the way down

21:17

your arm. And not once did he

21:19

yell, we, um, you're fun. You are

21:21

fun. And I apologize. Don't you

21:23

say that. Oh, a hundred percent. You were

21:25

so fun and likable. I mean, I, tell

21:29

me about you. Tell me about your interests. Okay.

21:32

Um, do you know rocks? Yeah.

21:35

I love rocks. Um,

21:37

I sort of like, I'll, I'll stack them in a

21:39

pile and then I'll just sort of take my fist

21:41

and I'll smash them. Um, and then mom, sorry,

21:44

I don't know what I'm doing. I get so nervous.

21:47

No, that's actually a really, um, it's a

21:49

very good question. I'll just say that, and

21:51

you said to be fully transparent and honest.

21:54

Um, that's just a very hyper specific question.

21:56

Right. So you might just say like, what

21:58

are your parents like? Because you don't know

22:01

people's situation. Maybe they were born like my

22:03

use it or here also a wizard. Why

22:05

born? Should

22:08

I come up there? Yeah,

22:10

why don't you just sort of out of trouble?

22:12

Oh there you are I

22:17

heard my name. This is you story his

22:19

mom is actually Birds

22:22

and wind and rain or something Yes,

22:24

I was brought into this world by conspiracy

22:26

of birds and wind and rain and fire

22:28

and frogs that insisted that food

22:30

need a champion and I did strut

22:33

forth into this world and Insists

22:35

that my magic become paramount and I

22:37

become the defender of all goodness and

22:39

righteousness How's that going?

22:42

Not great actually Yeah

22:47

So okay, so just take

22:49

it a little later. Okay. Okay. Okay So leave

22:51

me in with a leave me with a question and then and then

22:54

I'll answer and then I'll try and ask you my Back again. Yeah,

22:56

absolutely How

23:00

How are you able to? How

23:03

are you able to fit through doors? How am I

23:05

able to fit through doors? Oh my

23:07

goddesses. I'm so sorry No, no,

23:10

that's fine. I Have

23:12

it. I have a back and that's fine. So normally

23:14

I just sort of bend a little bit I'm if

23:16

it's it's mom so stupid. I'm so

23:19

sorry because I'm very flexible. Oh Flexible

23:23

I'm a flexible You

23:29

don't have to pose like that fun look

23:31

at me and I'm touching my toes Sorry,

23:35

sorry, I'm sorry. I'm sorry. Oh, yeah, you just

23:37

got it's all right. It's all right shit. I don't normally do

23:39

this I'm gonna pick you up. Okay, I'm

23:41

sorry. Sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm

23:43

sorry. It's all I'm a

23:46

no, no, I can't make this person. I can't

23:48

I can't so I'm just gonna die alone. Oh

23:53

Don't I lo, please hold me up here so

23:55

fast I think I'm gonna be sick there are

23:57

already so many people on this podcast right now

24:00

we're going to die alone. Let's see if we can change that for

24:02

you. One. Oh, I thought

24:04

we were counting ourselves off.

24:07

I have to say, Carly, I don't think that

24:09

last one's your fault. I think that Chunt asked

24:11

a question that perhaps put you in your head.

24:14

I mean, you're very aware of

24:16

your own physical body. Yeah. So

24:19

why don't we just try it again? Perfect.

24:22

And at this time, Chunt,

24:24

maybe just ask about

24:26

an interest or something. Maybe something you haven't

24:28

commented on. Oh, also

24:30

what she could do, Carly, what you could also do

24:32

if you're comfortable with it is- Kiss?

24:35

Oh, sorry. What was that? No,

24:37

I was just saying you could pick up Arnie since

24:40

he's already up here. Pick up me since I'm up

24:42

here as well. And sort of like in your hands,

24:44

make us talk like how you hope the conversation goes.

24:46

Oh, that's a great idea. Yeah. Oh

24:49

my God, this is yes. Okay, yes, yes, yes. Okay,

24:52

amazing. Thank you. Thank you. Thank

24:54

you. No, of course. Of course.

24:56

Okay. Thank you.

24:58

I was gonna say, hi,

25:01

how's it going? And

25:03

then, you know, you over here. And you're saying, and

25:05

you're me. And so we sort of go, oh, sorry,

25:07

sorry, sorry. And I'm just gonna go, hi, hi. It's

25:11

nice to meet you. You look so

25:13

handsome this evening. And then we got the other person

25:15

up here. I was just gonna say, oh,

25:17

yeah, that's okay. Honestly, I saw you from across the

25:19

bar and I was hoping you were my date. Ha

25:22

ha, ha ha. And so we started going back and

25:24

forth. Sorry, sorry. This is good stuff. And then I

25:26

just sort of say, hey, he goes, hey, like, you

25:28

know, like, what? And then this

25:30

is maybe a little forward, but why don't we get out of here? And

25:32

I sort of go, oh, I'm usually not that type of giant. And then

25:34

the other person goes, oh, no, I didn't mean to presume. And

25:37

then I go, yeah, you didn't mean to presume. And the

25:39

other person goes, you know, oh, that's fine. Sorry,

25:41

you forgot I mentioned it. I go, no, can't forget you mentioned

25:43

it now. And then you kiss. And

25:45

then you kiss, kiss, kiss. And

25:47

then you kiss. Wow,

25:51

twice in one season. Sorry, I got

25:53

a little into it. No,

25:56

that was perfect. I think that if

25:59

you feel uncomfortable. with

26:01

physical contact that early in the day. You

26:03

don't have to agree to it, obviously. I'm

26:07

dying for physical contact, I would say. Oh,

26:09

okay. Well, then I- Actually, you

26:11

broke off my leg, but I'll just throw that

26:13

back. Thank you, sorry about that. No worries. Honey,

26:15

are you all right? I

26:19

think a rib or two is maybe broken.

26:22

I think every time you wanted to say I

26:24

was talking, you just kept squeezing along with the

26:26

words, and that hurt, that hurt.

26:29

That's my bad. It's just your mouth wasn't opening when I

26:31

was doing that, and so I was finding when I squeezed

26:33

your mouth, opened a little bit. Yeah, can

26:35

I- It did. Carly, do you mind

26:37

if I give Chunt and Arnie some notes

26:39

real quick about that? I thought you did great. I love

26:42

that. Thank you for saying that, I appreciate that, and

26:44

I personally love direction, and I hope sort of as

26:46

a group, we can take direction while. Arnie,

26:49

when you are being held up like a doll

26:52

in a scenario like this, you really should try to

26:54

mouth along with the words. Okay, yeah. That'll help your

26:56

ribs from being broken, but I'm sure they'll grow back.

27:00

Yeah. I can't. You know I'm good at listening to what other

27:02

people are saying. I know.

27:04

Chunt. Perfect. Oh, thank

27:06

you so much. Barely miss you, man. No notes. And

27:08

I just want to say thank you, director

27:10

for giving Arnie notes, because I felt like giving him notes,

27:12

and I restrained myself, and I feel like he just wasn't

27:14

giving me a lot to work on. I felt like

27:17

giving him notes too, was that crazy? Carly, right? What,

27:19

everybody? I don't even know him very well, and

27:21

I was like, can I say something? Yeah, it's really fun.

27:23

Right, yeah. Yeah, go for it. How

27:25

is this in pain? I was

27:27

just trying to be authentically go with what

27:29

I was feeling in the moment. Arnie, an

27:32

artist uses their pain. They use their pain.

27:34

To act is to be in pain. And

27:37

it just kind of felt like you didn't want to be in my

27:39

hand and being squeezed, if I'm being honest. I saw

27:41

that. Right. Can I ask

27:43

you guys a question? Please. What

27:45

do you think of my outfit? Red

27:47

dress is a classic, beautiful garment.

27:52

Did you see the butt? I didn't see

27:54

the butt. Well, you haven't stood up. Well, if you turn

27:56

around and you can see the butt, it's got a fun

27:58

thing on there. Do you see it? Oh.

28:00

Can you read it? Juicy? Yeah,

28:03

it says Juicy. What is that? OK.

28:06

Because it's red like an apple, and sort of I

28:09

like apples Juicy. And so that was sort

28:11

of my thought process on there. But then

28:13

there's like an arrow coming out of Juicy,

28:15

like pointing directly to your rectum. Like, I

28:17

don't know. You don't

28:19

think that that's good? You think I should? I brought a couple

28:21

of other outfits I can try them on. I can sort of

28:23

like try them on quickly. If you want, that's

28:26

fine. You know, Juicy's

28:28

very, oh, maybe

28:31

overly inviting. OK, well, it's just

28:33

one of those things where we have this saying sort of

28:35

from my mountain. And we basically say dress

28:37

for the job that you want. I don't know if that's

28:39

something that you've heard before. But that's sort of like, I

28:41

don't know if that's like regional, if that's like a hometown

28:43

thing. But we say that a lot.

28:45

And so I was just sort of like, what do I want? And

28:48

I'm like, I want to get smashed by a hot wizard.

28:50

It sort of like might be brilliant. Sure. OK.

28:52

And you should get what you want. Sure.

28:55

I don't know. I was just like, maybe this is kind of nice.

28:57

Yes. Yeah. Here's what I'll do. Here's what I'll do. Here's

28:59

what I'll do. We say this thing up on my mountain. I don't know

29:02

if you guys have ever heard of it, which is

29:04

like business in the front, party in the back. And so that was

29:06

sort of like what I was going for here. I don't know if

29:08

you guys have heard that. That's sort of like a thing that we

29:10

say on my mountain. I have heard that.

29:12

It's usually in regards to specific

29:14

haircuts. But it works in all.

29:17

Haircuts? All sorts of ways, yes. OK.

29:20

We only say that about this dress,

29:22

specifically, on my mountain. Oh. Which

29:25

mountain are you from again? The

29:27

tallest one to the north. Oh,

29:29

the tallest one to the north. Oh, yes. That's

29:32

a very famous mountain. Yeah. Arnie,

29:35

have you ever been to the tallest mountain to the north? No.

29:38

Is that the name of the mountain? That's the

29:40

actual name of it. The Giants named that one.

29:42

And no offense. They

29:44

aren't the most inventive namers. No.

29:47

Yeah, that's true. I'm going to be the third shortest

29:49

from the east. Here's

29:51

a girl. It's very practical. Helps them get around. Yeah,

29:53

it's just kind of nice to know. And then you sort of have

29:56

a well, and it's tough. I don't know if because you're so short,

29:58

it makes a difference. Hey,

34:59

I'm Ryan Reynolds. At Mint Mobile, we like

35:01

to do the opposite of what big wireless

35:03

does. They charge you a lot, we charge

35:05

you a little. So naturally, when they announced

35:07

they'd be raising their prices due to inflation,

35:10

we decided to deflate our prices due to

35:12

not hating you. That's right, we're cutting the

35:14

price of Mint Unlimited from $30 a month

35:16

to just $15 a month. Give

35:20

it a try at mintmobile.com/switch.

35:23

$45 up front for three months plus taxes and fees. Promote it for

35:25

new customers for a limited time. Unlimited more than 40 gigabytes per month,

35:27

slows. Full terms at mintmobile.com. We

36:00

call this Deep Sales, and we've

36:02

built the first Deep Sales platform

36:05

with the next generation of LinkedIn

36:07

Sales Navigator. Right now, you can

36:09

try LinkedIn Sales Navigator and get

36:11

a 60-day free trial at linkedin.com/trial.

36:14

That is linkedin.com/trial for a 60-day

36:16

free trial. Let LinkedIn Sales Navigator

36:18

help you sell like a superstar

36:20

today. Just go to

36:22

linkedin.com/trial and get started. We

36:27

should go party. Yeah. I

36:29

feel like we've seen 60 to 80 outfits. It

36:33

just feels like... I know. That commercial

36:35

break was like a day long. Yeah.

36:38

It just feels like... She looks great,

36:40

but it just feels like nothing's clicking. There's

36:44

no wow factor. It's not like... Yeah.

36:47

It's not... Yeah, and she's perfectly

36:49

lovely. It's not... Yes, it's

36:51

not her. It's the outfits. Yes. Okay.

36:54

This is the only other one that I have packed.

36:58

I don't know. Okay, let's slowly lower

37:00

our newspapers. No, you're going to shake our head

37:02

no. What

37:06

do you think? Carly, you

37:09

look outstanding. You look

37:11

radiant, Carly. Really?

37:14

Stop. Don't say that if you don't mean it. Carly,

37:17

you're all that. Stop. Do

37:20

you mean that? I do. Oh my

37:22

God. You're all that. Really?

37:25

You're all of that. All of that. So, I

37:27

mean, just the original red dress in

37:29

a slightly darker shade of red is exactly what we

37:32

were looking for? Yeah, that's all it does. Somehow, that's

37:34

all it needed. We

37:36

shouldn't have moved on from that first

37:38

one so fast. Yeah. Wow.

37:41

I'm crying. Really? You're

37:44

all of that. So, I

37:46

mean, just the original red dress in

37:48

a slightly darker shade of red is exactly what we

37:50

were looking for? Yeah, that's all it does. Somehow,

37:53

that's all it needed. We shouldn't have moved on

37:55

from that first one so fast. Yeah. Wow.

37:59

I'm crying. I'm crying. Oh, I

38:01

feel beautiful. The downside is

38:03

it's been at least a day. So

38:06

I'm a little, I'm starting to kind

38:08

of be certain that your date isn't

38:10

coming. Um, the

38:12

can, I guess I'm, I'm still a little

38:15

uncertain how the system works where you, you

38:17

post a, a drawing

38:19

of yourself, like in a public place. You never posted

38:21

a drawing of yourself in the square with your name

38:23

and your sending stone information. I'm old, you know,

38:26

there's no judgment. I just haven't like,

38:28

I just haven't. But there's anything to be

38:30

judgmental about that literally is how everybody does it

38:32

now. You post it, you get a drawing of

38:34

yourself. You post it in the square. People go

38:36

around and they either rip your, um, drawing off,

38:38

crumple it up and throw it in the river

38:41

or they rip it off and then they get

38:43

your sending stone information and then they send you

38:45

a message. Oh, okay. Have

38:48

you never heard of rivering? No.

38:50

Oh, I mean, that's tough

38:52

because then you like, if other people would like it, they

38:55

don't have a chance to see it. Well,

38:57

yeah, that's kind of, that's kind of a thing. You got to like

38:59

go back on a regular basis because then, you know, people have seen

39:01

your, um, uh, your flyer if it's gone.

39:03

And so then you know, to put up a new one,

39:05

you know, that you're getting traction. So it's kind of bad

39:07

if yours is still standing. It means that nobody's interested.

39:09

Do you try to do like as recent

39:12

a painting as possible or if maybe you

39:14

just have a really good older painting that

39:16

you prefer? I have a

39:18

painting, um, with a little animal that

39:20

I normally do. Uh, but

39:22

obviously current situation standing, it's

39:24

been like a little bit of a

39:26

touchy subject. Uh, so I just sort

39:28

of do, um, my finishing school photo

39:30

from the mountain. Yeah. Uh,

39:33

Arnie, I think as you've, since you've heard about it,

39:35

you're going to walk by and see so many up.

39:38

There's a lot of guys will be like holding a

39:40

fish or, uh, it's like a

39:42

drawing of them at mako poco or something, petting

39:45

a tiger. It's a, you start to see the same

39:47

thing over and over and over. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

39:49

It's like kind of hard to differentiate. And I think with

39:51

mine, sort of like how I make it a little bit

39:53

different is, um, I put my, sort of

39:55

at my eye level. And so then it's sort of

39:58

like the thing of like, it'll either be. You

40:00

know, somebody tall enough, but more often than

40:02

not, especially in this area, I will attract

40:04

a wizard, somebody that has some sort of

40:06

power of flight or power to bring

40:09

it down from the height, which

40:11

is like very cool and exciting. Oh,

40:14

that is fun. I

40:16

have to say, is

40:19

there a chance that your painting doesn't

40:21

give an accurate sense of scale? And

40:24

that these potential dates are showing up

40:27

and are surprised

40:29

that you are the size that you

40:31

are, that

40:34

you're as tall as you are. I can't be. Here, I

40:36

have one in my pocket. Take a look. It's

40:39

the mountain and then in the foreground. Right,

40:42

but. Oh, it does look like with the perspective. And

40:44

also, you said there's an animal in your picture. I

40:46

was picturing like, you know. Yeah, well, that's

40:48

for scale. So if you take a look at the

40:50

photo, you can see way down in the corner. Can

40:53

you see? Yeah. There's

40:55

a bat. There is a bat. Yeah,

40:57

I think that's a giant bat, which

41:00

is kind of misleading.

41:03

To be fair, they shouldn't be leaving if

41:06

they've made a date with you. You're

41:08

right, you're right. Regardless of size, but. Yes,

41:10

thank you, Dory. I appreciate it. Can I

41:12

call you Dory? Is that okay? Dory. Ooh,

41:14

I like that. That's a good one. That's

41:17

a great one. Sorry, I just kind of went for it. I just feel

41:19

like maybe we've gotten there. I love

41:21

that. That's the garlic we want. One who

41:23

goes for it instead of saying sorry. Stop,

41:26

okay. Give us a spin. I

41:28

feel so much better. Okay, a new drawing, fine, fine,

41:31

fine, fine. I can do a new drawing, absolutely. What

41:33

are we thinking? Do you mind if we

41:35

paint you? Yeah, can you sketch?

41:39

Please, please, I'm begging you. Can you sketch for me? I feel

41:41

like I just look so hot right now and I just need

41:43

to sketch now because I'm not gonna be able to recreate this.

41:45

And the lady's really good in here. I'm gonna say most

41:48

of Chun's paintings are really horny, but maybe that's what you

41:50

want. Yes, I think that's what. Oh my God, yes.

41:52

Oh, yes, oh my God, it's yes. I

41:55

have an idea. Chun, you do the

41:57

drawing. Okay. Garly, you hold

41:59

on. your hand again to show

42:01

for a sense of scale. Yes.

42:04

OK. And then and Chunch, you draw

42:06

on another guy in your in your

42:08

painting. Is that I don't know. I'm not. I'm

42:10

not as tiny as you. Absolutely. OK,

42:12

sure. Like I can do. Yeah, there's

42:14

like maybe we write on Arnie's forehead,

42:16

not a threat. Yes. Or like, or like

42:19

I don't even think we need to write it on his forehead.

42:21

I think people are going to know it's already subtextually there.

42:23

I think they'll read it on his forehead, whether

42:25

it's there or not. I've

42:27

heard people. Oh, yeah. Oh, sorry. Can I just talk to

42:29

you for like one second? Yeah, of course. Guys, I'll

42:31

be right back. Sorry. Sorry. Just like

42:34

one second. Yeah, I just feel

42:36

I feel

42:38

like we're connecting. Yeah,

42:41

I felt the same way, but I didn't want to say

42:43

anything because I'm like, well, I'm not a wizard, so I

42:45

don't have a freaking shot. No, I I

42:49

don't know why I said that. I like, you know,

42:51

I just like I date wizards. Yeah. Una. Yeah. So

42:54

I'm just like, I don't know. I'm just like, what's your

42:56

what's going? Or can

42:59

I? Is your mom dead? Sorry. I

43:01

don't know why I asked. No, I don't know. She's not.

43:03

Here's the thing. She's not. And I said that. And

43:06

we have more of a report because I'm laughing because

43:08

that was funny. But if she was, I'd probably be

43:10

upset. She's not. You

43:13

said are while they're over there talking. I just

43:15

want to this is going to

43:17

sound crazy. I just want to run something by you. I

43:19

think Garley and I are connecting. Really?

43:22

Yeah. Based on. I

43:25

just, you know, just the way she said I'm

43:27

not a threat. And

43:29

yeah, but she called me Dory. How I'm the

43:31

smallest. And she dates wizards. Yeah.

43:33

Oh, wait. So you're saying you think you

43:35

and Garley are connecting? Look, I'm

43:37

clearly too old for her. She said that

43:39

she made it very clear. But

43:41

I think, you know, I don't maybe she's got some

43:43

daddies and who knows? But I'm not going to go

43:46

there. If you feel like you have a shot, then

43:48

just ask her out. I mean, maybe this Ava one

43:50

guy will show up. Maybe you won't. I

43:52

mean, she did come here looking for someone who looked a little

43:55

bit like me. Yeah. All

43:57

right. Well, let's let's go over there. And only

43:59

better. go over there and just, you know, take

44:01

your shot. Is your mom

44:03

dead or like what's going on? Oh, no,

44:05

no, no, no. She did

44:07

eat my dad, though. So that's

44:09

like a fun fact. Amazing.

44:11

That's incredible. Yeah, yeah,

44:14

yeah. You know, he

44:16

was cheating on

44:18

her and so she ate him. So

44:21

that's sort of like my thing. Yeah, eating,

44:24

eating, eating. Yeah. Yeah. Or

44:27

that was funny. Yeah, he did cheat. Thank

44:30

you. Oh, my gosh. Thank you. Different. Thank you.

44:33

Well, it's it's good. It's good to laugh

44:35

at these things. Wait, when

44:37

did you shave, Ysidor? What?

44:40

When did you shave? Just

44:42

a few minutes ago. And why did you shave

44:44

it like that? I just thought

44:46

this little strip of hair down the middle

44:49

of my chin might be really attractive. Little

44:51

landing strip. Leave some mutton chops here on

44:53

the side just and then like see some,

44:56

you know, skin in between. No mustache, though.

44:59

What do you think? I

45:02

mean, do you want me to be honest with you? Or since you've

45:04

done it already, do you sort of want some? Red cart

45:06

is this up front? There's like a

45:08

tiny like a shortened. I just got

45:10

a red cart recently. Oh,

45:13

red cart. Sorry. It took me a

45:15

while to climb up here. Those are so expensive.

45:18

What are you all? Hey, what's

45:20

everybody talking about up here? Huh? Just having a.

45:22

Oh, hi. I'm Garley. Nice to

45:25

meet you. No, hey, we've met.

45:27

I'm Arnie. Oh, Arnie. My God. Hi.

45:30

You just have a face and I look at them like, who

45:32

is that? Yeah. Yeah. Honey, what is going

45:34

on with you? Can't stop smiling. Yeah, I'm just,

45:36

you know, a happy person. I'm a happy person.

45:38

I don't struggle with depression in any way. I'm

45:41

just like a happy guy. It's a weird thing

45:43

to do. Did you put on cologne? What is

45:45

that? What I could find is that I just

45:48

found rub some food under my

45:50

shirt. Just, you know, freshen up a little bit.

45:53

Oh, I see. What an interesting choice. Yeah.

45:56

So just, you know, me just being my

45:58

regular self, just on the. hunt

46:00

for juicy bottles

46:07

Just something I'm just throwing just nothing you say

46:09

not in reference to anything and there are several

46:11

pauses and stutters in between each word How did

46:13

you end up saying that took so much time? Yeah,

46:16

I had so many chances to stop and that then

46:18

I didn't take any of them Right.

46:21

Well, yeah, I like doing that too. We

46:23

should talk about that sometime. I guess Well,

46:26

does anyone need a drink from the bar I'm Financially

46:28

stable and happy to buy us all around the drinks. Oh

46:31

my god. I said be amazing. Thank you so much Yeah,

46:33

I will take Six

46:36

pints of the meat I guess six

46:38

pints of meat sure Amazing.

46:40

Thank you Wow. I chunt on e Whatever

46:44

you want price is no object. Oh,

46:46

well, I own the bar. So Yeah,

46:49

still price is no object. Why are you looking

46:51

at garlic when you say that did I mention

46:53

I own this tavern? It's the curse tab. No,

46:55

wait, do you actually I do? Yeah.

46:58

Oh my god. So can you like get us free meat then? I

47:02

guess I guess I could do that. Okay. Oh, wow Never

47:07

give us free meat. That's yeah, I'll meet all around then

47:09

I love a little bit of Brad to if you've got any I

47:11

mean like if it's your place if that's not like too much I

47:14

can't believe that we've been here for like

47:16

what days and this is coming up. This

47:18

is crazy loan. This is incredible Yeah,

47:21

I'll take some bread too. Aunty why don't you get us some

47:24

bread and some meat and and hey You know

47:26

what take me a while to climb down. How about some

47:28

butter too? Oh, yeah, actually just give

47:30

me a knife cuz I could just spread garlic on

47:32

that bread and eat her right up. She's so cute

47:39

Read the room Arnie you're literally putting

47:42

your finger into Your hand

47:44

that has the shape of a hole right now whenever she

47:46

has her head to Okay No,

47:50

I know no no outside. Oh, I'm

47:52

leaving outside don't look hard but outside Wait,

47:56

there's a guy getting another horse. My peripheral

47:58

vision is I just

48:00

tried to... I'm so sorry

48:02

I'm late. Holy shit, he

48:04

looks like what I transformed into, but 10

48:06

times hotter. Wow. Hi,

48:08

Aveline? Hey, yeah, you're Garly,

48:10

right? Yes, I didn't

48:13

think, sorry, I didn't think you were coming. Yeah,

48:15

I was supposed to be here about a week

48:17

ago, and I got lost. I

48:20

was at the mountain just to the north, and I

48:23

turned and went to that mountain to the

48:26

east. No worries, dude, but we're close. Ernie,

48:28

we're close. Yeah. There

48:30

are a lot of people here, but they... But it's fine, because he

48:32

owns the bar, so we can hang. Whoa,

48:35

hey. It's no big deal. Hey, what? Like, just

48:37

be cool, all right? Stop patting my shoulder.

48:39

Yeah, be cool. Yeah, just

48:41

be cool. This is so funny. His hand

48:43

is very strong. Yeah, it's all cool. Hey,

48:46

Garly, I just really like your dress. I think

48:48

you look so nice. Oh, thank

48:51

you. I had some really cute

48:55

little friends help me pick it out. A friend?

48:57

Oh. Thank you. I

48:59

think she's talking to me. Should we? Is

49:02

it great? Should we get out of here? I don't know. Should

49:04

we get out of here? I was gonna

49:06

say we could still have dinner and stuff, but

49:08

it's been a week, and I've eaten like 20

49:11

times since then, so. Fuck you.

49:13

Why don't we just get out of here and go back to my place?

49:15

I would love that, thank you. Yes,

49:18

yes, I would love that. But

49:20

it's opposite day. All right, do you

49:22

need to say goodbye to your little friends or something? Yeah,

49:24

just give me one minute. I'll meet you on the horse. Yeah,

49:27

I'll get the horse started. It's opposite day. You probably live

49:29

in like a hole. Charlie

49:31

gotta let it go. He can do math. We

49:34

can't compete with that. No, I can do

49:36

math. Garly, is this, where's the

49:38

person sketching this? Is this like one

49:40

of those hidden sketching pranks? Oh,

49:45

no, no, that's so funny. No, hey,

49:47

I just wanna say thank you so much, and I know

49:51

that maybe this is like a little bit weird, but

49:53

hey, you know, this is good for everybody. You guys

49:56

can get back to your podcast or whatever. A squeeze

49:58

of the shoulder, no. Hey,

50:00

you guys are really good friends. Thank you. Oh

50:04

Perfect exactly what I want. Oh

50:06

girl you hold on one second. Yeah, oh,

50:08

sorry Hang tight. I'm gonna

50:10

talk to a Arnie use it or

50:12

yeah Um a lot happened over

50:15

the last however many days Carly's been

50:17

here. You kind of have this whirlwind

50:20

Romance, she kind of confessed that she liked me.

50:22

I confessed. I like her Really?

50:24

This is really throwing a wrench. I didn't think this guy was

50:26

gonna show up, but I think I have the perfect plan I'm

50:29

gonna be Unbelievably nice to her

50:32

and to him and be

50:34

like her closest confidant and friend and

50:36

then ultimately When they

50:38

break up, I'll be like right there Guys

50:43

I feel like we've got a three tickets to

50:45

challenger situation here between the three of us. Hey,

50:48

I'm sorry I got to get out of here. Um,

50:50

the horse is warm and it's kind of expensive to

50:52

feed no, no Yeah, sex go

50:54

on sex, but I just wanted to

50:56

say Here's my sending stone

50:58

info and like text me we should hang out. Yeah

51:01

and here I got you I

51:03

was gonna say made but you don't really make food

51:05

you cook it I got you three grains of rice

51:07

just cuz from earlier when we were talking

51:09

about rice You remembered. Yeah, you

51:12

can just give your information a chunt. My stone

51:14

is in the ground. I have a land stone. Oh

51:20

So it doesn't get text so just just this is

51:22

the land stone I haven't I don't know how to make a

51:25

Call on mine. So, uh, huh, you know, I'll see

51:27

you when I see you I guess Yeah

51:30

for you. I like you. Yeah,

51:32

text me or yeah Send

51:34

me anytime and I just really like

51:36

the tiniest hint of possibility and nothing more So

51:39

I'm actually really good with with where we're at,

51:41

sir. Are you okay? Sorry,

51:45

I was just chatting with my friends that's our that's our name. That's

51:48

our name. That's our name You've

51:50

known him for days You

51:53

three thank you so much. Thank you and

51:56

yeah, don't just stand here go have sex and

51:58

don't think about me I guess. I don't know. I don't

52:00

know. Okay. Okay. Okay. Oh,

52:07

through the window! Through the window! Oh,

52:11

Jesus. Put some pants on that horse. Look at that.

52:13

Horse cock ch- oh, that's him. He's

52:15

changing pants. Oh, boy. Alright,

52:18

Garly. I'm gonna put my horse on your

52:20

back. Let's go. Oh, great. Okay. Which,

52:23

uh, where do you live? What is- what direction? Oh,

52:26

I'm just, uh, west of the east mountain. Oh,

52:28

fun. Okay, great. And then I'm on- well,

52:30

it doesn't matter. We'll go back to the place.

52:32

Okay. Alright. Okay, this is fun. And

52:34

heavier than it looks, um, but in a good

52:36

way. Hey,

52:39

Arnie. Bye, little friends. Bye. Fuck you.

52:41

Hi. Hey, Arnie. Hey, Arnie. Yeah. Do

52:43

you think he makes you laugh? No.

52:46

But that's not everything. Should've

52:50

asked Garly to join my quest to feed

52:52

evil. So tall. Very tall.

52:54

She literally crushes rocks. Next time.

52:57

Next time. Oh, let

52:59

me- oh, actually, speaking of, let me just send her-

53:01

she sent me her sending stone

53:03

information. No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no,

53:05

no. Don't send- I'm just- I'm just- Don't let me

53:07

let you live. I have a joke. It was seconds

53:09

ago. I have something- It was- even I know don't

53:11

do that. Okay. It was seconds

53:13

ago. And the rock you

53:15

have messaged is not in- oh.

53:20

Cool. You

53:22

got a fake rock. Where's the taint paint? Somebody give

53:24

me the taint paint. It's gonna

53:26

be a long night, boys. Why

53:28

is it gonna take you so long to paint that? Because it

53:31

has to be perfect. There

53:42

are times when these audio recordings ending

53:44

where they do comes as an absolute

53:46

act of mercy. Usin' or the Wizard

53:48

was played by Matt Young. Chunk the

53:50

Talking Badger was played by Adderall Rify.

53:53

Garly the Giant was played by

53:55

special guest Vic Michaelis, the host

53:57

of very important people on Dropout

53:59

TV. The safe little

54:01

nest for all the shows network

54:03

television can barely explain to each

54:05

other. Vic would like to plug

54:07

Trans Lifeline, a non-profit organization offering

54:10

direct emotional and financial support for

54:12

trans people in crisis. Props to

54:14

that. To learn more,

54:16

visit translifeline.org. Heads

54:18

up that we're taking next week off for

54:21

the 4th of July. There will be an

54:23

Unlock Patreon episode on the main feed to

54:25

tide you over. And then we'll be back,

54:27

partially recharged, with a new episode on the

54:29

following Monday, July 8th. Hello

54:32

from the Magic Tavern is

54:34

an independent production, made possible

54:36

by supporters of the Magic

54:39

Tavern Patreon. Supporters like... Merton

54:41

Nikolai Grigorsevich Jordan M Nathan

54:44

Poulet Geraldo Fubar That feels

54:46

like a code that I'm

54:48

unwilling to crack. Jen Mosafin

54:51

Marwin the Mage Yes, everyone's

54:53

a wizard now. Brian Brakefield

54:56

John Curtis Grace Bormetti Mr.

54:58

Orlin Dana Ayala Mason

55:01

Monroe Robert Wilson Spinkie

55:03

Mouse Detective Robo Todd

55:05

the Rusty Gray W

55:08

Parker Scarborough Alex Nagayan

55:11

Summer Kit Wiles Antonio Smith

55:13

and Spencer Sandy, child of Peacon.

55:15

Patrons get ad-free episodes, all the

55:17

spin-offs, and at least two new

55:19

bonus episodes each month. The most

55:22

recent Patreon bonus is an episode

55:24

recorded in 2018, I just said

55:26

new. I

55:29

am humiliated. With Karl Tartt

55:31

that has never been released until now.

55:33

Still not new. Here's a clip. You're

55:37

a busker, is that correct? That is me. Song

55:40

sing, I see. Oh,

55:42

wow, so you're sort of a... He pulled

55:44

off a run. That's amazing. Wow,

55:47

so you sing songs? Sing you a tune

55:50

for a taste of mead. All gather around

55:52

and take heed. Oh,

55:54

mead for you then. I shall be right

55:56

back. What would other people like to have?

55:58

I'll take a penicillin. Penicillin? Tell

56:01

them I want like go up to the bar

56:03

and say what should I have. I'm not gonna

56:05

do that. I'll be right back. I'll have a

56:07

meat and soda. Meat and soda. Ooh, meat and

56:10

soda. Great. Once we get you

56:12

a taste of meat, we can hear some of your

56:14

music? Absolutely. Why, uh, you

56:16

seem like such a like friendly fellow. What are you doing

56:18

in a tough bar like this? I like

56:20

it here. I feel like the aesthetic

56:22

fits me. I love the taxidermy. Oh,

56:25

yeah. Uh, I'm in town meeting families

56:28

as I do. Meeting families? Yes.

56:31

Mothers, fathers, sons.

56:34

Sure. Daughters. Oh. Uh,

57:01

I love it here, too. My

57:03

name is Director George Hanojy. I'm

57:05

in Poland. My

57:08

name is Georgia King. And

57:11

I am thrilled to be the host of And Away We Go, a

57:14

brand new travel podcast on Wundery Plus where we'll be whisked away

57:18

on immersive adventures all around the world. Where

57:21

we go, what we do, what we eat, drink,

57:24

and listen to will all be up to my very special

57:26

guests. And

57:28

the world's taking us on a whirlwind

57:30

trip around Disneyland. We'll eat a bowl

57:32

of life-changing pasta with Jimmy O. Yang

57:34

in Tuscany, Italy. And how do you

57:36

feel about a spot of sugaring off

57:38

with Emily Hampshire in Montreal? And

57:40

Away We Go will immerse you in some of the

57:43

wonders of the world.