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A listener production. Activate

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your internet. Because

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the Heymish and Andy podcast

0:12

starts in three, two...

0:18

Sorry, still buffering. One.

0:23

Ahoy to me, Herdy Gerty.

0:25

Heymish. This could be better.

0:28

Hello. I'm just

0:31

saying it could be better quality from

0:33

previous weeks. So that's my instinct. Ahoy

0:36

to me, Cruith. Jack. Cruith,

0:38

Cruith. Is there something to do? Why

0:40

am I getting Irish vibes from this? Am I warm with

0:43

Irish vibes? Well,

0:45

that's interesting because, yes, it was Celtic,

0:47

that last one. I am a egil.

0:50

Are we Hurley players? No.

0:54

We are obscure stringed

0:56

musical instruments. Now

0:59

we're back. Probably

1:01

overcorrected, I would say, from the Ham Chees

1:03

and Tomato incident. Are

1:06

your guitar shaped? Yes. And

1:08

we make a sound by... Hurley Gearly. A

1:11

Hurty Gerty. Yes. Your guitar

1:13

shape, make a sound by rotating a hand cranked turned

1:15

wheel. Yeah. Rubs against the strings.

1:17

Oh, yeah. You're the Cruith, Jack.

1:19

Yep. An ancient

1:21

Celtic instrument. Cruith tells the truth. It's

1:23

like a tiny little harp. A tiny harp.

1:26

He's interesting, isn't it? They're not bringing out any...

1:28

The harp is oversized, so why not make it

1:30

smaller? I think the harp is

1:33

correct sized for the sound they need, isn't it? Do

1:35

you reckon they're showing off pretty quick how big it

1:38

needs to be, isn't it? I don't think that's why

1:40

it's taken off because it's just difficult to get around.

1:42

That's true. Whether we're in the room, place to place.

1:45

But if then you weigh that up

1:47

against the Cruith, which is the smaller

1:49

version with no one playing at all.

1:51

Yeah. You've got to ask yourself,

1:53

what are you seeing more of these days? Now granted,

1:55

you ain't seen a lot of harps, but you're

1:57

seeing zero Cruith. Is that the little... That

2:00

is the pocket size harp the instrument you

2:02

sometimes in Rene's some paintings the baby angels

2:04

would be playing something. Oh, yes Yes, that

2:07

gives you an idea of back when it was published probably

2:09

like the iPhone back in the day where they're like What

2:12

a harp in your pocket? Do

2:15

you believe like, you know, it's like how people go

2:17

like the technology No, you could have landed there's more

2:19

computing power in your pocket now than put man on

2:21

the moon Yeah back in the 1600s.

2:23

They'll be saying there's more harp power now in your

2:26

pocket The bill used

2:28

to have her whole orchestra just you know, the gil

2:30

my one or Eagle is

2:32

a long Skinny

2:34

guitar with only two strings. There

2:36

would be a stringed instrument association

2:39

somewhere wouldn't there? He goes, okay,

2:41

cuz obviously these die out like

2:43

someone would be like we got

2:47

We got so many things that are

2:49

so close to what is popular. Let's

2:51

just let's streamline them Yeah, cuz if

2:53

you look like a modern-day herdy-gurdy player

2:55

Be honest look us in the eyes

2:58

and say no, I genuinely think it's

3:00

better than the guitar It's

3:03

not just the novelty And

3:11

I and I'm just not doing it so people

3:13

pose go what's that? Oh Aaron

3:19

who's in the UK using hamish new calm

3:21

very easy to use system to upload what

3:23

he's been doing Yeah,

3:25

boys Aaron here just finished a beautiful round

3:28

of golf on a Saturday morning Just

3:30

sort of give an update on how the day went So

3:32

14 balls were bought from the

3:35

clubhouse. These are like balls so common men

3:37

style Zero of those balls

3:39

are coming home with me. I found more of

3:41

the trees than the fairway But

3:43

overall a beautiful day wrapped up around

3:45

the twelfth hole Mainly

3:48

because I did not have any more balls

3:50

left in my bag to continue So

3:53

yeah, beautiful day overall. Thank you. Cheers guys

3:56

Now let's do an interesting position here

3:58

Jack doesn't it hearing that golf, Kat,

4:01

you are interested, but you

4:03

also know. I've made

4:05

a pledge of my own that I

4:07

won't let Golf Fork infiltrate the podcast.

4:10

I was the last remaining person on the

4:12

show that wasn't interested at all in golf.

4:14

And I understand what it's like to be

4:16

in that position because when other people talk

4:18

about golf, you just zone out. So boring.

4:21

I've only been there for a year, myself,

4:23

maybe 18 months. I have I do have

4:25

memories of DG, my life, DG. And

4:27

I could remember that being a very boring story

4:30

from before golf. And now we

4:33

were all I think you and me the

4:35

most were fighting interests. We were like, oh,

4:37

we're interested in this. But you must remember

4:39

there's more than us listening. So

4:42

we kept that out last. I

4:44

can't even I can't talk anymore about it. I

4:47

actually have people messaging me saying you were the

4:49

last remaining non golf person

4:51

on the show and we can't have this

4:53

devolve into a golf podcast. Yeah. I said,

4:55

yeah, I keep my pledge. Even

4:57

though I do. I don't know. You

5:03

made a you made a solemn pledge in your stick. Yeah,

5:05

good man. Much like my friend Taylor

5:08

who made a similar pledge.

5:14

What a pledge is going around. Hey,

5:16

you said you were at the top of the show. Yes.

5:18

Sorry. Just making sure

5:20

I was nodding to Mike to go. I like that. And

5:22

please do send it to a

5:25

very good friend. A

5:27

very good friends we choose to use. And

5:31

we've chatted a fair bit this year. We've had we've

5:33

come out we decided on the first of us of

5:35

the podcast. We're still we're still

5:38

the go to spot for confectionary issues.

5:40

We then had a flood of

5:42

people going. Here's a particular chocolate

5:44

that didn't live up to spec.

5:46

You know, yes. Keep it out of the cat. Keep

5:49

it out of the cat. Just so I think there's what

5:51

I mean. I know we had a big discussion during the

5:53

week. I think but I mean, I'm

5:55

a heavy on the chocolate. We have been heavy

5:58

on. I think we just acknowledged. There

6:00

are going to be human errors at these factories. They

6:03

seem to be rife with errors. Out of any product.

6:05

One of my side of the fence is by a

6:07

person standing in a photo that opened a packet of

6:10

pods with no chocolate. This is

6:12

what I'm saying. We have a whole thing that

6:14

looks like a packet of crisps. Interesting,

6:17

but are we standing firm on this? Like

6:19

we can't just catalogue every instance of a

6:21

missing ingredient. Yeah, we can't. We can't. And

6:24

then we acknowledge they happen and it seems

6:26

to happen across all brands. It's

6:28

not one particular company doesn't have a

6:30

particularly stupid staff or

6:33

something. No, exactly. It

6:36

just seems to be, you know,

6:38

unshakable human error. I've got something

6:40

to bring to the table in the chocolate room, but it's

6:42

the right other end of the spectrum. Two

6:44

examples of chocolate heroes, Andrew.

6:48

Companies going above and beyond. Now,

6:51

example number one started as an

6:53

investigation from alert listener Matt. It

6:56

is, I don't think we have a word limit

6:59

on our submission form, do we? Like,

7:01

you know, some emails, if you're writing, it's

7:03

like 150 characters, whatever. If we have one an

7:05

hour, it's into the thousands of

7:07

words. Matt has got an

7:09

essay through here. You're a better chance

7:11

to be read if you concise, though, would you say?

7:14

I agree. Sometimes, particularly if you've gone through a bunch

7:16

that day and you're like, I'll just do a couple

7:18

more. And if you click on that one, no, Jack

7:20

wouldn't know what we're talking about. He's never looked at

7:22

them. I sometimes won't even read

7:24

a long text message from a friend if it's too

7:26

long. I'll

7:29

just drift through and get the gist of it. Yeah.

7:32

Well, that was my every bone in my body was going,

7:34

just get the drift of that. But I actually got sucked

7:36

into it. I'll give you the gist. I'm not going to

7:38

make everyone get through the essay. But it came, it falls

7:42

in the zone of Oreos. Now,

7:45

people would be familiar that there's the classic

7:48

Oreo out there. There's a lot of different

7:50

variations for Oreos, the minis, the whatnot. But

7:52

this is to do with the Oreo and then

7:55

the double stuff Oreo. I've got to pack in

7:57

here for research purposes. They've

8:02

done with the picture on the outside,

8:04

it does look like exactly double the

8:06

stuff being done. This is

8:09

what Matt's investigation was about because it's actually

8:11

a creme too. You'll be pleased to know

8:13

this is not creme. Obviously it doesn't have

8:15

enough milk content or whatever. So it's C-R-E-M-E.

8:18

But they go in bold font two times

8:20

the creme. Okay. So

8:22

chocolate cookie sandwich with doubled, that's

8:24

like big writing sweet vanilla creme.

8:27

So Matt's gone,

8:29

okay, that's a claim that we're

8:32

just taking on face value. Like a lot of food

8:34

marketing. He's gone, have they

8:36

really? Have they actually doubled it? Or

8:38

does it just look about twice the

8:40

size when you take out a double

8:42

stuff and sometimes you go, okay, I'm

8:45

not blown away by the volume in there. It is

8:47

noticeable against the other one. Anyway, holding one up at

8:49

the moment and we'll see. And we'll see writing one.

8:52

It just seems about.

8:55

Well it doesn't seem double whether. He then does,

8:57

right? They're about the exact same price, about $2.50.

8:59

So there's 14 cookies in the original packet.

9:02

There's 10 in the double stuff. So he's gone, hang on

9:04

a second. They just doubled the creme so

9:06

that they can sell less biscuits. Yeah.

9:09

All right. The next

9:11

few hundred thousand words follow

9:13

this. So he's

9:15

gone, I'm going to do the experiment.

9:18

Buys all the cookies, buys the

9:20

few packs, goes home, separates the creme

9:22

from the biscuit. So he goes, let's go

9:24

buy weight. Is there double the

9:26

amount of creme? So the average

9:28

weight of just

9:30

the creme from the original,

9:32

you get 2.2 grams of creme in an

9:36

original area. In a double

9:38

stuff, you get 4.8. Wow

9:43

more than double. He

9:47

then writes, he goes, okay, I not what

9:49

I was after. Cause obviously it's more fun

9:51

to bring scandals to the show. But however,

9:53

it makes the point to go, look,

9:55

if we're going to take down the deceptiveness out there,

9:57

all you have to do is take down the deceptiveness.

10:00

to celebrate those that are jumping the bar,

10:02

that are leaving it. And the Devil's stuff

10:04

Oreo lives up to its word. Now you

10:06

got to understand you're going to get four

10:08

West Biscuits, but if having twice the

10:10

cramp means that much to

10:12

you, you got to know that

10:14

they're also telling the truth. So I had softer Oreo in

10:16

that instance. What are we going to do this? 24

10:19

biscuits in the studio. Okay. I'll put those over there for the

10:21

moment. The

10:23

interested in getting Jack if you and I get any of your. I

10:28

feel like for the rest of the podcast, Hamish will

10:30

be wrapping things up quickly. Did

10:34

you say there was a second hero? Second

10:37

quick hero, especially mentioned we had a go

10:39

up for a rocher recently. They left out

10:41

a hazelnut. Um, we, we

10:43

can know whether the rocher was

10:46

the actual like

10:48

chocolate itself, like the style. Yep. Oh

10:51

yes. Or is it just the name of that assembly

10:53

of ingredients? Yes. Um, this is, this

10:55

is on, this is on another, another vein. This

10:57

is from Amy. She says, look, heard you talking

10:59

about the, for a rocher and the ambassador. Um,

11:02

it's a big fan of both. Um, in the late

11:04

nineties, she goes, I was at 19 years old hanging

11:06

out with a couple of girlfriends one afternoon. We

11:09

were very relaxed, having a giggle. Um,

11:11

and then who knows how,

11:13

but they were struck with what you could only

11:16

describe as the monkey. So perhaps they'd done some

11:18

exercise or whatever they built up. Bunch

11:20

of friends hanging out. And then suddenly they're laughing a

11:22

lot. Laughing a lot. And suddenly

11:25

they're made unit costs a lot of energy to

11:27

laugh. And then suddenly through that exertion, they're hungry.

11:30

So they start talking about like, is

11:32

the inside of the rocher? Is

11:34

it Nutella? Cause they are both made by Ferrero. Oh,

11:39

so they decide to call the hotline. Um,

11:42

because there's like on a lot of products, you can do

11:44

the questions and comments, what line call the hotline. Got

11:47

onto what they discovered is an absolute legend

11:49

of a guy who did confirm it was

11:51

Nutella. They had a great chat to

11:53

him. And then a week or so later,

11:55

a giant box of Ferrero Rachets arrived at

11:57

her friend's place. Very nice. I

11:59

mean, that's the best. Ambassador, you're spoiled. Now,

12:05

she doesn't say it, but you get the feeling she may

12:07

have talked to the ambassador. Maybe

12:10

the ambassador was working the call for that because

12:12

we know he was. He's a chocolate

12:14

hero. Last one,

12:16

Ando. You mentioned... How many people

12:18

can be sitting manning those hotlines

12:20

for food? Fascinating, isn't it? Most

12:24

of the day doing absolutely nothing. I know. You

12:26

would've... The ordinary had a huge chat to them.

12:28

It'd be like someone in solitary confinement. Go,

12:30

go, go, go, go. I thought

12:32

you're back to talking to a volleyball. So,

12:34

episode 243 Ando, recently you

12:37

were talking about peanut

12:39

M&Ms. And you went, I've got

12:41

a raisin in one before. I thought I had a

12:43

raisin in one. How would that happen? We wondered whether

12:45

that was even possible. We received a lot of correspondence

12:47

about this. Could it happen? In not the

12:49

way you think. The most popular

12:51

theories are either, and I'm not saying this

12:53

could ever happen at the Mars factory, but

12:55

this is theories that are being thrown around.

12:58

It was either poop from a rodent, like

13:01

mouse-do or something, that got chocolate

13:03

coated and you've eaten it. Or

13:05

someone reckons it was a fly, a dead

13:08

fly, a boy fight that landed in the peanuts. And

13:11

it's been coated and you've eaten it thinking it

13:13

was a sultana. Now, you

13:15

can buy chocolate coated flies online. I

13:19

think what we do is get

13:21

a few in here and

13:24

we coat them in the same chocolate as

13:26

an M&M. And we get

13:28

you to eat a few flies and you go, yes,

13:30

that is what I had that day. Yeah. It's

13:33

just a cat. It's

13:35

a cat. It's a

13:37

hard guy. Sorry, it says that's a soft maybe.

13:44

Guys, the style of phone call I get

13:47

from my partner Beck, where

13:50

I just don't ever get the answer right. And

13:53

it's not a trick. I just know that in

13:55

my soul, I should be able to do it

13:57

better. But it's normally when you're in

13:59

the car, you're in the car. she's distressed and

14:01

I just don't seem to be able to hit

14:03

the mood perfectly. I mean, it's a tough ask.

14:06

Make the situation better

14:08

for her and invariably

14:10

I've made it worse by what I've said

14:12

and then I get off the phone

14:14

I go, why did I say that? But

14:17

you're under pressure in those particular moments. I

14:20

wanted you to experience it. I wanted to

14:22

see how you guys act because it's

14:24

an interesting thing those moments where your partner

14:26

rings. It's very much between you

14:28

and them. You don't really get to experience other

14:30

people's versions of it. That's true. Yeah,

14:34

you wouldn't know anyone else's playbook on this. No.

14:37

So I've built a boyfriend simulator today

14:39

and I'm going to... We've

14:42

already done it where I've put you

14:44

both through a real life situation that happened to

14:46

me. I was playing the role

14:49

of Beck and to see how you react

14:52

in a certain situation. Darcy

14:55

said that he's got brilliant tools to

14:57

be able to make my voice sound

14:59

exactly like Beck. For instance, I could

15:01

say, hi, it's Beck Harding here and

15:04

he said it'll turn out a bit. Hi, it's

15:06

Beck Harding here. Perfect. Amazing.

15:09

AI man. Scary stuff. Look out Beck. You'll

15:12

be selling gummies in deep fake ads in

15:14

a second. So

15:16

he's nailed that which is good for

15:19

him. I'll

15:21

put the scenario to everyone so they could have

15:24

a think about how they react before they hear

15:26

how you guys both went. But

15:28

I was away on a golfing trip. Beck

15:32

was at our apartment, which is a rental. I've

15:34

mentioned this in a part of the pod before. This is

15:37

where the gas pipe had burst. She

15:39

had no running hot water and no

15:41

cooking for five days. And

15:44

I think it was day two she gave me a call

15:46

and this is how the call went down. She

15:50

was obviously exasperated about it. I

15:52

didn't really know what to do. Let's see

15:54

how you guys tackled it first and then we can

15:56

kind of revert back to where maybe I went wrong.

15:58

But shall we start with Cheyenne? Jack, this

16:00

is the simulation. This is

16:03

how Jack would respond to the same,

16:05

the exact same, obviously sounding exactly the

16:07

same as not. It's me, but Darcy

16:09

has done these adjustments. How

16:12

Jack would respond to the call. Hello.

16:17

Hey, the gas pipe is broken at the apartment.

16:19

I've got no hot water and no cooking. It's

16:21

been like this for five days. Oh,

16:25

okay. And did

16:27

you call someone? Yes, but what

16:30

are you going to do? What are you going to do? You're

16:32

away golfing. Yeah, I can't, uh,

16:35

I can't really think of even where the gas pipe

16:37

would be found in the house or what to do

16:39

with it. So I would have to call a professional.

16:44

So, good Jack. The number

16:46

one rule of call centers is just

16:48

make it someone else's problem. Do

16:51

you know when you're on the phone to like the bank or

16:53

something and they're like, now are you a new customer? No,

16:56

no, no, no, no. I'm

16:59

going to transfer you to a new customer. No,

17:01

no, no, no. Right. Right.

17:04

Right. And

17:07

when they find that they've got a reason to

17:09

transfer you, they get so excited. They're like, oh,

17:11

I guess it's a card problem. You

17:13

come through the general customer. No,

17:15

no, no, no, no, no. I wish you could

17:18

do that. Thank you. So

17:20

Jack, you went the old, this is it. This is

17:22

a plumber. This is official plumber. Let's analyze this. You

17:24

then say said at the end, though, Jack, I

17:27

guess I'll have to call a professional. Does

17:29

that mean you would have then called a

17:32

professional for Bianca? I mean, like we'll sort

17:34

out the problem together. I thought maybe

17:36

I'll Google it while you stay on the phone. We'll find

17:38

a number, that sort of thing. That's great,

17:40

Jack. That's good. I'm a golf coach. Good

17:42

on you, Jack. Um, I guess

17:45

I slightly misunderstood the assignment, Andrew, because I was

17:47

you. I thought we were meant to be there.

17:49

You. Yeah. I

17:52

think you just wanted me to come in and play you. Well,

17:55

that would also have been informative and I can learn

17:57

from that. So let's see how Hay went. Hello.

18:03

Hey, the gas pipe has broken

18:05

in the apartment. I've got no hot water and

18:07

no cooking for five days. Congratulations

18:10

Lucky Lady. You just

18:12

won an all expenses paid trip to our

18:14

hotel for five days with me, Andy the

18:17

love machine Lee. Clear

18:20

your diary. But you're away. You're

18:22

away golfing. Yes, sorry.

18:24

I won't be there. Sorry. The

18:27

hotel visits paid for by me, but I

18:29

guess I will remain away. Sorry about that.

18:32

But I am still a love machine. I just

18:34

love golf more than you just

18:36

love golf. Let's just leave it there. Did

18:43

you throw the hotel fries at her? Well,

18:47

to me again, this is like... What

18:52

did you do? Because these are pretty bare minimum. I would have thought

18:54

both of them. What did you do? What

18:56

do you want me to do about it?

18:58

See that, I know enough to know that

19:01

that's probably not going to yield up. Oh

19:03

my God, you're so right. I haven't bothered

19:05

the trip. Andy, Andy, this is...

19:08

I mean, surely you know this, but after

19:10

10 years of marriage, if I have any

19:12

advice... It's never a

19:14

solution, not the answer. Just

19:16

say, that sounds tough. And then stop.

19:19

That's what I should have done. Then

19:22

throw out the hotel fries. You

19:26

want me to do about it? I'll tell you

19:28

what, once I returned, there was not much love

19:30

machine. Andy,

19:32

the frustration machine, Lee. Wandering

19:35

around the house for many weeks. And

19:44

we have been peppering you a bit lately

19:46

since the start of the year. We've done

19:48

one or two, but we have such a

19:50

backlog of upset Andy's to clear. I feel

19:52

like the backlog would upset you. If you

19:54

saw how many... That's very true. Break

19:58

my heart. Sir,

20:00

but you've softened the blow. It's good

20:02

bedside manner. I'm giving me bad news

20:05

because the idea of lessening a backlog

20:07

definitely does appeal. What would you say

20:09

if I told you that you could

20:11

clear a backlog today? In

20:13

a minute. Okay. Everything

20:19

is neat and practical. That's

20:23

the way he likes it. But

20:25

once it wasn't, upset

20:27

Andy. Okay. A

20:29

lot of upset Andy's coming in. I mean, we see

20:31

them in real life. Jack, you, did you have one

20:33

that you said before that you... Yeah, I

20:36

got a brand new one and actually even annoys me.

20:38

So I don't know why I don't fix it. But

20:40

my desk at home is a mess. Cables

20:43

running everywhere, bits of paper and everything. I

20:45

plugged my phone in. Let me at it. You

20:48

would really clean it up. It could be too much

20:50

even for you, Andy. I don't think so. What's

20:52

your desk like? I bet you've got clips, cable clips.

20:55

So you don't have to... Why

20:57

do you need so many cords? Because

21:00

I charge my phone on there, I charge the watch on

21:02

there. I got different things

21:04

I'm charging. And then I've got also

21:06

a loose phone charger. But

21:08

the... I don't know. But now

21:10

the cable of the loose phone charger is mixed up

21:12

with the other ones. So every night I plug it

21:14

in sometimes twice. Sometimes I get it in the first

21:16

go, but it's the lucky deal. Whether it's the one

21:18

that charges or not. One's in, one's

21:21

out. Yeah, that would annoy

21:23

me. So many fair cables floating around,

21:25

always in the hope that a backup

21:27

will be made. Yes. Like backpacks,

21:29

drawers. I'm always just desperate for the moment

21:31

where someone goes, and then we've got a

21:33

spare cable. Yeah. Doesn't happen that much. No.

21:36

No, Jack. I... Yeah, come around a while. But

21:39

Jack, when you... But think about... Think about... Think

21:41

about the time you would spend undoing that though,

21:43

Jack. Yes, undoing the cable, figuring out which one's

21:45

which. You've got a young son. You want to

21:47

see him grow up. Yeah. I mean, you've just...

21:49

You've been in my friendship for years if you

21:51

love. I'm doing that all of a sudden. I

21:53

turn around and he's 15. All

21:58

right, you've got a backlog. We've got a backlog. Frankie,

22:00

Frankie, Augusto to you.

22:02

What have you got

22:04

for Ando? So

22:07

this is a calendar based one.

22:10

So basically my partner

22:12

works fly-in fly-out two

22:14

weeks on two weeks off and

22:17

I've got his roster in my calendar

22:19

so that if any events come up

22:21

I know if he's here or

22:23

not. So far pleasing Andy. Andy

22:26

loves the shared calendar. Yeah,

22:28

so about four months ago

22:30

his roster actually switched. So

22:33

now if I check my calendar, see

22:35

if he's coming to an event, it

22:37

actually says he's here but I just remember

22:39

no he's not here. I'm not

22:41

gonna reprogram the calendar. But

22:50

what if your brain

22:53

forgets? No, no, no,

22:55

it's really not that hard you just go, is

22:57

he here? Not here. And

23:02

I dare say Frankie, the time will come

23:04

again when the calendar, the shift swing the

23:06

other way and then we'll be back to

23:08

perfect. It's changing, it changes all of these.

23:10

You're like the person that just waits out

23:12

daylight savings. I don't like those types of

23:14

people. Every year on our Magna. No one

23:16

knew how to change the Magna's time. Jacob,

23:24

how old are you Jacob? What have you got to upset

23:26

Andy? So

23:28

I've got a lawnmower that's battery powered

23:30

and I know that my backyard

23:32

takes two cycles of the battery.

23:34

So I have to do one

23:36

half of the yard, charge

23:39

the battery then go again. So what

23:41

I sometimes do is I'll mow one half

23:43

of the lawn up and down and

23:45

then I'll mow it side to side for

23:48

the second battery run. So hang on, so

23:50

what the net effect though is you still

23:52

got a mown lawn. Is it

23:54

do but you've got the mow patterns

23:56

going lengthways then on the other going

23:58

sideways. Yeah, you

24:00

see the patterns, yeah. And one

24:02

half of the lawns going up and down and the other half going side

24:04

to side. Like I said, doesn't bother me. I'm

24:06

going to have to see a photo to see if it

24:08

bothers me. Oh, it would bother you. I can picture this

24:10

and there's no way this pleases you, Andy. This would be

24:12

almost like someone going out and mowing

24:15

the lawn as if they're vacuuming the floor,

24:17

like just mowing it around, just pushing it

24:19

around until it's all mown. But I think

24:21

that if it's perfectly half... It might be

24:23

a stylistic choice. There might be like a

24:25

stylistic choice, the way that sometimes at a

24:27

palace or something, they mow it in different

24:29

directions to create a serious pattern. It's an

24:31

interesting area for us to get into here,

24:33

Jacob, because Andy's old house he lived in,

24:35

and he's currently on the run and staying

24:37

at various safe houses, but his old house

24:40

he lived in had no lawn, townhouse, in a

24:42

city townhouse. The haunted house he's

24:44

renovating will, I assume, have a giant lawn.

24:46

Yes, lots of lawn. Yeah, seven

24:49

or eight acres, that's why. Good,

24:51

Jacob. Good,

24:53

Jacob. And I reckon, Andy,

24:56

lawn mowing patterns are going to be a

24:58

massive part of your life. We'll come back

25:00

to this episode, I think, and be like,

25:02

remember the days where Andy was

25:04

like only vaguely interested

25:06

in lawn mowing? I think you're getting

25:08

in that little robot. Look,

25:11

Andy, try it, and if you like it, then

25:13

great. If you don't like it, then there you

25:15

go. I think

25:17

even the recharging... I don't mind having Jacob

25:19

here always. I

25:24

like, I mean, even the fact that you just

25:26

have to charge at Ando, it's like two hours.

25:29

That's the part I disliked about it. The fact that he... If

25:31

that was me, there's no chance the lawn would be

25:33

getting mowed on the same day. No way, and I'm

25:36

with you. He should

25:38

get a second battery pack so he can go in,

25:40

flick it straight over, and then head back out. But

25:42

yeah, the idea of... Are you going to end in

25:44

one? Nope. Not after the

25:46

job about the acreage. Just doing

25:48

a little testing to see if we're turning to that kind of show.

25:50

We're not. Eden? Eden?

25:53

Ohoy to you, Eden. Ohoy, boys. Happy

25:56

birthday, Andy. I'll celebrate them. Very good.

26:00

So this annoys my partner as well,

26:02

so he's very much like Andy. When

26:05

I am folding my towels or tea

26:07

towels, I don't really care if

26:10

it's long edge to long edge or short

26:12

edge to short edge. And

26:14

so when I put them away, they're all different

26:16

sizes. It's

26:19

actually another length versus width, not

26:22

caring scenario. Yeah, because I'm not

26:24

doing my folding when I'm watching

26:27

TV, change it up, not even

26:31

as long as they're folded. I mean, the

26:33

only reason, the only way I would accept

26:35

this is if

26:38

the cupboard they're kept in, it

26:40

fits better if you have a

26:42

certain amount going long ways and then it fits the

26:45

other bit, the shorter way

26:47

fits better in the cupboard.

26:49

That noise was Eden falling

26:51

asleep there. Absolutely

26:54

not. I'm folding my towels so I get

26:56

a perfect score. Meg,

26:59

Eden, Jared, wrap this up for us. We heard

27:01

this backlog cleaned out. Oh boy, boys, how's it

27:03

going? Very good, Jared. Gusto to you, sir. That's

27:06

a good way. Thank you. So I bought a

27:08

new TV in 2018. Yes, must be nice. Well, 2019. I'll

27:10

probably have had the regular turnover. At the time, yes, it would have

27:12

been nice. Have you bought four? Have you bought four? Yes,

27:15

considering it's about the size of Andy's touch screen

27:17

for his golf thing, right? Jared,

27:19

yes, so you've got an enormous TV. What

27:34

on it bothers you or doesn't bother you? Well,

27:37

it doesn't bother me, but to this day, it's

27:39

still got the advertising stick in the side of

27:41

the corner. Yeah,

27:44

I hate that. It's the same with the one I

27:47

don't even like when you've got the star rating

27:49

on the lawn like the washing machine. It takes

27:51

the star rating off. Yeah, it's taking it off

27:53

for. It's

27:56

for advertising purposes to market

27:58

it. I think that's

28:00

a showroom only sticker. It's a showroom

28:02

only thing. It's like wearing the tag

28:04

on your t-shirt around. It's

28:06

like the price tag. You got to get rid of

28:09

that stuff. But the sticker on the... I mean sticker

28:11

on a screen and I've seen you go absolutely bananas

28:13

for a fleck on a screen. Yeah, yeah. No,

28:16

that's the hottest we've had, Jared. That

28:18

was the advocate today. What

28:20

sticker is it? Like it's not the energy

28:22

sticker, is it just the price? I think

28:24

you said. Well, it's just the 2018 new

28:27

sticker from when we got it, which yeah, takes up

28:29

a large portion of the... A lot of them are on the inside. And

28:33

is there any... do you have any times where it crosses your mind

28:35

that you should go over and get that off or just kind of

28:37

a bit of a jam-packed schedule? Well, there's

28:39

a couple of sports where it blocks out the scoreboard but

28:41

you sort of... Again,

28:44

I think you generally... You generally know who's winning.

28:46

You can tell from the looks on their faces.

28:49

Yeah, exactly. You can tell from

28:51

their attitude. The score's for hat.

29:02

Boys, you might have mentioned the other week

29:04

we were chatting. Someone said we're talking about

29:06

music, right? And Jack, you

29:08

were mentioning like, oh, you know, what your little

29:10

boy's into at the moment. And

29:13

I think I mentioned to you and

29:15

I was like, oh, we're in the

29:17

bangers phase at the moment. Like the

29:19

kids... Like driving to school... Of over

29:21

history bangers, you mean? Yeah, well, just

29:23

the last 20 years I was saying.

29:25

Like EDM, like big club hits. Oh,

29:28

wow. Like that would

29:30

be my Spotify wrapped for this year,

29:32

definitely after summer. I can't believe we're

29:34

in stuff. Yeah, even like

29:36

new stuff like fish is in there and stuff.

29:39

But I tell you what is getting the biggest

29:41

run, and this is like relentlessly over summer, is

29:44

Sandstorm by Darude. For

29:47

those that aren't familiar, hit it Jack, we got a little

29:49

taste of it here. Do

29:51

you remember Sandstorm and... Yeah,

29:53

you know Sandstorm. It's good. Right,

29:57

going to school... It

29:59

feels like a great... And when you

30:01

teach your kids about where the drop is... Yeah. Yeah.

30:04

Mate. Here it comes. Math. Yeah.

30:08

Maybe a bit of PE. I reckon. We're

30:10

all going to do it today, guys. I

30:12

reckon, yeah. Here we go, guys. Ready? Got

30:15

your lunches? Yeah. Everyone

30:17

pumped? Everyone pumped for a good day at school?

30:19

Alright, here we go. Hey, starting the school. End

30:22

of last year, start of this year still,

30:24

gets a bit of a heavy rotation. Yeah.

30:27

And you'd take the family SU or do

30:29

you go in that dropped Commodore with the

30:32

Sprite screen

30:34

and a huge muffler? Over

30:38

summer, it actually gave birth to an incredible

30:40

game. Okay? And I

30:42

want to share the game with everyone because I think it's adaptable.

30:46

We were driving around the south coast of

30:48

New South Wales. So like under a couple

30:50

of hours south of Sydney. And

30:53

we spent a few weeks on the south coast. There

30:56

is quite famously the Kaima blowhole at

31:00

down the south coast. A lot of people would have visited famous if

31:02

you're ever kind of going up or down the coast. And

31:04

there's many blowholes around Australia. Kaima

31:07

is a big one. And you know, that's

31:09

a lot of, you know, if you're in,

31:11

if you're in or near Kaima, you're going to see the

31:13

blowhole. But there are many, you know, no matter where you

31:15

live on the coast, there are rocks, there are tides. Sometimes

31:19

there's a hole which creates an exciting and

31:21

unpredictable event. Yeah, well, for people who don't

31:23

know what it is, it's essentially a little

31:25

bit of a hole. Normally a

31:27

cave leads to a hole opening and then water

31:29

can come in at the dry tide and the

31:31

ferocious ocean and suddenly water comes out the hole.

31:34

Lift, put it from nowhere. Yes. Like

31:36

a geyser. And it looks like, kind of looks like

31:38

a whale spat. But the Kaima one can get bloody hot, like good

31:40

10, 15 meters. So

31:44

we've done the Kaima blowhole, but that's all

31:46

good. The next day we're listening

31:48

to the song. I don't even remember who

31:50

came up with the idea, but we were

31:52

like, hey, imagine, right, if

31:54

you were listening to the song and right at

31:56

the peak moment of the song, the

31:59

blowhole erupted. Oh, that's amazing. It'd be

32:01

huge. So like, let's go and do it. So

32:03

we drive down and

32:05

for the blowhole there, we're coming in. Get out.

32:10

Welcome to the filling in this good holidays. So you can

32:12

get out and like stand on the platform and a lot

32:14

of people do that waiting for the right moment. But I

32:16

was like, well guys, the game is, as we

32:19

park where we can see the blowhole, I'll

32:21

start the song and everyone piled into the

32:24

front seats. So we're all there and it

32:26

has to, there's the biggest build of the

32:28

song. It has to hit at the biggest

32:30

build. Right. Any chance you can try to

32:33

time it or is it so? You don't

32:35

know. I'm sure we could

32:37

talk to an oceanographer or something, but I

32:39

think it's kind of like very random when

32:41

it happens. Like, cause it sort of involves

32:43

to like the water going back out and

32:46

then like two waves hitting at once or

32:48

whatever. So I don't know,

32:50

moons, winds, tides. It'd be tough. Call

32:52

it essentially mathematically completely

32:54

random. So that's

32:57

what adds the fun. Yeah, of course. Now

32:59

you could use this as something if there's

33:01

another natural phenomenon in your in your local

33:03

area that has this. But can I just

33:05

say the excitement in there? They're

33:07

getting ready. But

33:10

when Beck comes down the stairs. Just need about

33:12

a four hour intro. I think you've got your

33:14

work cut out for you. The,

33:16

do you know what it is? It's

33:18

actually the nature equivalent of when you watch

33:21

the DVD screensaver bounce around in

33:23

your way, you're hoping for it to

33:25

land perfectly in the corner. And we've all

33:27

been in those moments. The

33:30

anticipation is huge, right? This is the drop you're waiting for.

33:32

I think this is about a minute 30 in. This

33:35

is the actual build. Like by this stage in

33:37

the car, everyone's like. And

33:47

to a lesser degree, here.

33:54

That one doesn't count. But if one

33:56

day if you got the big one,

33:58

imagine if you got the following. one

34:00

as well. And then it really looked like

34:02

the ocean was dancing to sandstorms. So you

34:04

would have possibly known if the, if it

34:07

had gone too early, you would have, what

34:09

kind of anticipation did you have when you

34:11

got to that part? We've done it five

34:13

times. We haven't got it. Okay.

34:17

But I just keep hoping it's going to make it

34:19

even sweeter. Wait, you played the

34:21

song five times and tried to get it or you drove

34:23

out there five times? Five different days. Five different days. You

34:25

only get one shot per day because that's part of the

34:27

excitement too. We're not just sitting there all day till we

34:29

get it. It won't mean anything. Yeah. Like then it's just

34:31

random trying to get out. So you

34:34

can, you have to, you only get one shot per

34:36

day. Yeah, it's exactly like random John Ando. That's the

34:38

excitement of the guy. Long-term

34:41

listeners. So we haven't got it.

34:43

And yeah, a couple of the days you're right,

34:45

Ando, like we'd see it go early in the

34:47

build and you kind of knew. It's not, it's

34:49

not impossible to get in the

34:51

two and quick succession, but you did kind of

34:53

know. And at that point. You were now asking

34:55

for a double miracle to happen. Yeah. And at

34:58

that point, do you encourage your kids to stay

35:00

and watch it out like it's sporting matches where

35:02

you go? Yeah, stick it out guys. Yeah. Stick

35:04

it out. You can still come back from two

35:06

sets down. Yeah.

35:09

But geez, when it happens, I will

35:11

report back. Will.

35:14

It'll bring the house down. Hey,

35:21

of course, song sleuth we do in this show.

35:23

Yeah. I'll

35:26

kind of have a look

35:28

at songs that may have

35:30

borrowed a little bit from, from other

35:32

songs to see how close they are.

35:34

We've also done segment sleuth on

35:36

the show. Song sleuth

35:38

generally, there's a direct correlation as to

35:41

how likely someone is to get off.

35:44

If, if they're a, are there a friend of

35:46

the show or you personally met them or

35:49

perhaps been given tickets to one of

35:51

the gigs by the band themselves. Exactly.

35:53

That's certainly helps you walk free from

35:55

the court. Yes. I'm

35:57

also a segment sleuth where we've noticed.

36:00

podcasts or radio shows around the world

36:03

doing a segment that seems very familiar to us

36:05

because we were the ones that invented it. That's

36:08

happened again. So I've got

36:10

another segment sleuth for you. This

36:15

sounds like this sounds like this sounds

36:17

like this if this sounds like that

36:20

I'm your man Andy

36:22

Lee segment sleuth. Now

36:25

Ando the most famous one of these we're

36:27

talking about the other day was the Random

36:29

John. Yeah. Random John was sometimes to come

36:31

up with something on the show that you

36:33

know conceivably I think you know anyone

36:36

that's sitting down to think of things for

36:38

radio or podcasting there's gonna be some

36:40

double-ups if everyone's putting their brain in the same area.

36:43

But Random John did seem like one that

36:45

would be that would be unlikely for someone

36:47

to stumble over the game where we ring

36:50

someone a random number and if a John answers

36:53

we get a John point and if a Rob

36:55

answers it's minus one John point and if it

36:57

was a John Johnson that was a Golden John.

37:00

Now I think it was an

37:02

Irish show that listed all those rules. Just

37:05

the coincidences were a few too many in

37:07

that scenario. So what I wanted to ask

37:09

was is there a chance this is a

37:11

coincidence? Absolutely it could be a coincidence. Let's

37:14

look at the evidence. The segment that

37:17

we used to do this show I still do

37:19

actually is a segment called Song Sleuth for instance.

37:23

If you don't know what that segment is have a listen. Jungkook

37:27

is a member of BTS.

37:29

People are loving this song

37:31

and I reckon there might be a reason

37:33

people are loving this song because really

37:36

I'd be touched familiar but anyway this is the

37:38

song it's called Seven. Now

37:47

that sounded like a great pop song and

37:50

then Radio Mike, Podcast Mike

37:52

said reminds me of

37:54

this song. So

38:01

obviously a slower beat

38:04

going there. There's sped up scrubs. Unfortunately

38:06

the drum line is

38:09

really similar to me and I don't need no lab to tell

38:11

me that. I

38:14

got my ears and my feels. Yes,

38:16

song sleuth is the segment. And

38:21

there was a show in Australia, Ham,

38:24

that's doing a very similar thing. It's

38:26

brazen, theft if true to

38:28

be stealing in such a close

38:30

market. Yeah, exactly. Strange. I

38:35

think this is the second time we've been on Segment

38:37

Sleuth. Jack,

38:39

do you work on the Krishna Kannam

38:41

Show for your real job outside of this

38:43

hobby? I do. I can't

38:46

prosecute you. Let's have a listen to the

38:48

evidence and see. Green

38:50

Day released a new song this week. And

38:53

I just... Your head is in your hands by

38:55

the way. Is it that

38:57

bad? It is an existing song. I'll

38:59

play you the start of the new Green

39:02

Day song and then... Oh actually

39:04

before I even tell you what song it's like, I reckon you'll

39:06

be able to tell. This is in your

39:08

brain. Exactly

39:17

the same as Pink. So

39:20

what? Oh my. Bloody

39:28

hell, Jack. I don't like this. Don't

39:31

mind without me for pointing. Put them

39:34

together. I'll start to compare. Don't

39:40

mind the collaboration. Maybe

39:42

that's what they do. Pink Green

39:44

Day. Oh

39:47

boy. Now, now, now. I

39:51

don't wait to hear what comes after now. I

39:56

just honestly wanted to let the public know

39:58

about something that I... I was annoyed about

40:00

because Green Day is my all-time favorite band and I was

40:02

so annoyed that they released a song that sounded like a

40:05

pink song. I just had to get that

40:07

off my chest and why not do it in a public

40:09

forum. So you're saying it was more of a Jack loses

40:11

it. Which

40:14

is also a segment. Susie loses it. That

40:17

was just blind passion and I didn't even

40:19

realise until I started hearing it back, oh

40:22

this does sound sort of like what Andy

40:24

does every now and again at my hobby

40:26

job. And before we deliver any questions.

40:28

I actually do have one question. I think I'm quite

40:30

as adjourned. I think I'm walking free. Just

40:36

before we adjourn, Jack, now

40:38

that everyone knows that Breakfast Radio,

40:40

your real job, it

40:42

requires you know you're coming in. Sometimes you're just chatting.

40:44

It takes a lot to organize the

40:47

show. To do a

40:49

segment like that, that's like engaging and has like

40:51

a lot of sound effects in it and has

40:53

like a bit of like cleverness, some audio production.

40:56

Big Christian say to you, that was good. Well done

40:58

Jack. That was like, did you

41:00

get credit for the effort? Did you?

41:03

I think I did because you're right. It does involve

41:06

a bit more effort sourcing not one

41:08

but two songs. Yes and then having

41:10

to play them together. It's like more

41:12

of that way. That's great. That's such

41:14

a, that's such engaging content. If you

41:16

got credit for that, I think that

41:18

should go into a little bit of a pat

41:20

on the back for that one. Really?

41:25

I've weighed up all the evidence and

41:29

going off what Hamish said at the top, given

41:31

that I hang out with this guy who's a

41:33

pretty good friend, no case to act before. Thank

41:35

you mate. We've said that. Actually

41:39

not the most lenient walk I've ever seen

41:41

on this segment. Thank

41:53

you.