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2:37

It's Monday to Bank Holiday Monday! I love

2:39

Bank Holiday rambles! Do you? I really do! Other people

2:41

don't like working on the... I mean this doesn't work

2:43

is it? Let's make that very clear. But people don't

2:46

like working on Bank Holiday Monday. But I love it

2:48

because here, I can drive in and I feel like

2:50

I'm King of the Road. And there's less police around,

2:52

what? There's fewer police around. That's

2:54

a good point. More clients. I was

2:57

changing the music on my mobile phone,

2:59

connected to my mobile car. And

3:01

a policeman drove past me and I was

3:04

pressing the... I was turning on some Olivia

3:06

Rodrigo. Were you? Were

3:09

you doing it while it was held up on

3:11

the dashboard? Why was

3:13

it on the dashboard? Nah,

3:15

it's still a crime. Is

3:17

it? Because it's a Bank Holiday. I

3:20

think people forget isn't it? There's

3:22

no crime on a Bank Holiday. Or

3:24

is it because of the car you drive that

3:26

they assume you have diplomatic immunity? Yes! Get a

3:28

little flag! That's what it is. A little flag

3:30

for North Korea. But you've employed Luke Mortz to

3:32

cycle in front of you like he's a little

3:34

police escort, haven't you? Yeah, you know like

3:36

when they have big caravans and they

3:38

need a little mini behind them going,

3:40

Long, large load, watch out everybody. Yeah,

3:43

he does that. Oh, that's very humble

3:45

of it. Very humble. To do that,

3:47

characteristic like I'd say. Um... Hello,

3:50

Vish. Hello. Oi oi. Hello, Vish. First time...

3:53

Well, before we get there, first

3:55

time all season that people have

3:57

tweeted me and DM'd me. saying,

4:00

that'll be a re-acts question mark. And

4:02

it's been for a good thing. It's been for

4:04

a good thing. Nice, nice,

4:07

nice, nice blend on. Yeah, you're pleased to be

4:09

working today, aren't you? I'm always pleased to be

4:11

working. Um, yeah, I don't

4:13

know why more people aren't in. I cannot believe that.

4:17

How cowards are they? All the shit

4:19

I've had. I've expected more people. Oh,

4:22

dear. Well, before we

4:24

get to that, the

4:26

club season isn't quite over yet. We still have

4:28

the Champions League final this weekend, for crying out

4:30

loud. But the gate to the

4:33

Euros is slowly swinging open. I

4:35

am doing my best, everybody. The gate? Oh, it is.

4:37

It's always a gate. It was a gateway. We've

4:39

got exciting Euro news. On

4:42

Tuesday, the 25th of June, we

4:45

are hosting a special watch-along for England's

4:48

final game in the groups, just for

4:50

you, Ramble listeners. We're inviting a limited

4:52

number of people to come and enjoy

4:54

the game with us at the Northwood

4:56

in Angel, in North London. Tickets are

4:59

£10, which includes entry to

5:01

the venue and a free drink. You've got

5:03

a drinks voucher. I recommend a pint of

5:05

bagelies to get your moneys worth. Yeah. I

5:08

think that's making it very clear, that's not up for

5:10

grub. Well, we'll let the bard decide. It will be

5:12

a lager, maybe a wine. We will let the bard

5:14

decide, OK? All right. What

5:17

did you tell your listener? But

5:20

yes, the Football Battle Ramble patrons and subscribers, they've

5:22

had early access since last Monday. But for the

5:24

rest of you, now's your chance. Now

5:26

is your chance. Just sign up to

5:28

our new mailing list, the

5:30

Team Sheet, and you'll receive the Eventbrite

5:32

link there, where you can book your

5:34

tickets. If any tickets are left

5:36

on Friday, they'll go on general sale. So

5:38

you better be quick, as there's only a

5:40

very limited capacity, OK? It's not the London

5:42

Palladium. We're crying out there.

5:45

So head to rambleteamsheet.co.uk to sign up

5:47

and get your tickets now. The last

5:49

time we did an England watch-along, Marcus,

5:52

you were doing a wonderful job of just basically making sure

5:54

everyone had a lovely time. He's like a masses of ceremony

5:56

kind of guy. It's a wonderful

5:58

thing to witness, isn't it, Marc? in full

6:01

PR mode. Full England mode, more like. Yes.

6:03

Goodness. Yeah, yeah, yeah. A lot of hugs.

6:05

I wasn't there. I was part of the

6:07

ramble, but I did see a photo with

6:09

a lot of hugs. Yeah, yeah, well if

6:11

you're English you're welcome. If

6:17

you are English or otherwise, yeah, you will

6:19

get a hug from me. Right. But you

6:21

might get a bit firmer if you're... No,

6:23

I was joking. Bring your passport. Yeah,

6:26

we should check. Yeah, we should check. It has

6:28

to be below where you're kicked out. And

6:31

residency documents. If you've got any old ones, if

6:33

you've got... Bring

6:35

your parents as well as along as a moment. We're

6:39

looking forward to it though. We're looking forward to

6:41

a waterlog. They're very fun things, Jim

6:43

Campbell. They are. It was brilliant, the last one, wasn't it?

6:45

It was. It was a long time ago, so let's do

6:47

it again. It was a long time ago. England

6:50

did win. That helped. It

6:52

was a while, didn't it? But win

6:54

or lose? Win and lose, your honor,

6:56

Shmooze. Yeah. Right then. Highlights of the

6:58

weekend. Should we start with you, Vish? Yeah,

7:00

why not? Why not? This is

7:03

my show now. My hand

7:05

of the week was a

7:07

video that was doing the

7:09

rounds on social of

7:12

a little kid with a copy mania shirt

7:14

going down an escalator and

7:17

behind him someone else, oh, is that your

7:19

favorite player? And his dad turns around and he's

7:21

like, yeah, yeah. And he's like, well, he's my son. He's a copy mania's dad.

7:25

A very lovely moment. Lovely. Ten

7:28

pounds. Because

7:30

he wants to go to a waterlogger. A

7:32

copy mania is my son. Well, I'll send

7:34

my calls. Yeah,

7:39

if you do see him, that'll help.

7:42

Peter, your highlights of the week. I'm

7:44

afraid I'm having the Adam Armstrong

7:47

taking his top off. What

7:49

he thought was the final whistle. I'm sorry.

7:51

It's the only one that's valid. I think in

7:53

this question, what was the height of the week?

7:56

It was watching a man reveal a lovely

7:59

what's it called? A stat bra. I don't know what those

8:01

things are. That's basically what it is. It's that

8:03

bra. Yeah, that bra. We'll go with that bra,

8:05

yeah. That bra, and just like start wang-ing it,

8:07

wang-ing it around his head. It

8:10

was a throwing. Love it. He

8:12

was saying outside he should have been booked for that.

8:14

Yeah, yellow. I think that's a guaranteed

8:16

yellow. Well, the referee didn't see it, and it would have

8:18

been funny if he was on a yellow, got

8:20

the second yellow, and then went to penalties. He

8:23

can take what he was in there. I like that

8:25

he just unselfconsciously did it again. The actual

8:27

kind of weather. It would have been easy to shrink from that.

8:30

You got a bit of it. You are a man who likes

8:32

to prematurely take a stop off. It can't true. We still are

8:34

mal. From the beach man. Yeah, I mean, it

8:36

makes it sound like there's ever a reason for it. You're right. Driving

8:40

and thriving. Yes. Let

8:42

the nips enjoy the air con. Doctor, we'll see

8:44

you soon. But not in this

8:46

racing group. Jib, your highlight of the weekend.

8:48

My highlight of the weekend was similarly

8:51

adorable from my position to the Vicious, in

8:53

that Kai Havarts and Martin Odegard have gone

8:55

on holiday together. Oh, yeah. And posting really

8:58

adorable holiday stuff to them like playing poker

9:00

on a yacht and just having a lovely time. Playing poker

9:02

on a yacht. Is that top top of my heart? I

9:04

was about to say. Different type of holiday that I go

9:06

on. You hate poker. It's

9:08

adorable. It's lovely. Lovely. Is it

9:10

like a left footer's only holiday? I

9:13

think so. I think so. My highlight of the

9:15

weekend was Man City and I did win in

9:17

the FA Cup because it made our friend Vish

9:19

very happy indeed. And that's where we start the

9:21

show surprisingly. They made me very sad indeed. Oh,

9:24

yeah. Yeah, there are. There were some losers

9:26

in that final of the Manchester City because

9:29

Manchester City lost to Manchester United 2-1 in

9:32

that FA Cup final. And as a result, the

9:34

big takeaway is that Newcastle won't be playing in

9:36

Europe next season. Come on, Vish. Is it? Because

9:38

you're not going to... People hate it when you're

9:40

in the competition. Is it? Is it?

9:42

Is it? You'll

9:45

hate it. You'll hate yourselves. You haven't got

9:47

the squad for it. Is it? Yeah. You

9:50

in particular. I want to watch Moulder. You shouldn't be

9:52

allowed on Mainland Europe anymore. I'm

9:54

doing everyone a favour. Oh, dear.

9:56

But look, lads. I Tell

9:58

you why. It's been quite the weekend. We sat

10:01

here is very studio say no mercy nazi

10:03

whatever jobs of as you joking but you

10:05

guy says other. Spits

10:07

Israel that what you say die days at

10:09

also as well we get to the the

10:11

playoff on second of all that was about

10:13

Man City winning and will a lot of

10:15

the chat was about leads Surely this is

10:17

their time and neither habit. I wonder how

10:19

many people had gone for months united and

10:21

and sell them to with but not many

10:23

for months United to win that as a

10:25

cup final put they won it with to

10:28

first house calls me water Performance and them

10:30

you've got to take your hat off to

10:32

wear Eric Ten Hochhuth who's finally and it's

10:34

taken a while for us to read. really

10:36

exposed quality out of for the bullfrog. That.

10:38

He is only after so many trophies

10:40

and other fauna wins. Finally we got

10:42

him So many anomaly as a to

10:45

uncover a bullfrog one needs to become

10:47

a bold from. This is what has

10:49

a positive message on seed money wise

10:51

and a was kind of played out

10:53

at the beginning How we saw he

10:56

would me to vote on Friday in

10:58

the United States, things up in the

11:00

way they've tried to do previously against.

11:03

Teams. Who enjoy much more? The moon? What

11:05

a do a double. And.

11:08

It wasn't working to a point.

11:10

But. It was a was in a city just had

11:12

the bull there was a point on message of my

11:14

a mine who the united son. Fifty.

11:17

Minutes in as I've I would kill

11:19

for three consecutive touches. A little hill?

11:21

Yeah. now be nice. And

11:24

they didn't quite calm, but we still

11:26

schooled. In. Part because I

11:28

don't really know. like city, just headaches.

11:30

Really lucky lot of who goes by

11:32

accident. Or Susan

11:34

it was. It is a hit and hope com

11:37

as possible. He has to know why they've brought

11:39

it to know why they didn't bring it down

11:41

to do something with the I do is very

11:43

bizarre from monthly Pacific Lutheran same our but the

11:45

idea that you guys Ortega and Claudio who messed

11:47

up there to them as reliable players in the

11:50

last couple months of the season. And

11:52

then from that point or enters the Ortega that by

11:54

the way. but I was a they'd been voting important

11:57

moment rise to the. Ah, but.

11:59

It was. It seemed to a was a

12:01

was the or something. Maybe this is a

12:04

manner that goal those illnesses as a kid

12:06

that the bleeding and they can be killed.

12:08

Yes yeah I am. absolutely I forget they

12:10

lose games. Yes indeed indeed it espouses yeah

12:12

but tools in sees when I have route

12:14

ruthlessly. Ah and the fact is yeah we

12:17

did say that. You

12:19

know, in hindsight, The. Final last year

12:21

between the two sides months he noted that like

12:23

they know you can't go toe to toe with

12:25

them you have to have a bespoke game plan

12:27

against man city which allow people do but some

12:29

some seems don't for they did to us was

12:31

it did. To. The first other wall

12:34

here because at the school did or

12:36

blue so unless Reiser yes absolutely right.

12:38

and and in the photo exhibit was

12:40

he cannot shows schools a minute. Price.

12:43

Of that months united a team who. We.

12:45

Know some in recent decades, but you'd save. That.

12:48

For the majority the time with them. Come.

12:51

Back of a long time. Very.

12:53

Keen on use policy Brigham Young players. Price.

12:56

Of this phone or only to say only two

12:58

two teenagers have scored and as i got found

13:00

myself which know watson to sell it out I

13:02

am they doubled that it wasn't First half of

13:04

the i'm from Iowa. Price.

13:07

As oil so far in porn thing my

13:09

you I did he say and it felt

13:11

like a bit of a throwback performance. and

13:13

why didn't it? Because what? after the go

13:15

in particular. The first one a

13:17

i eat more United became more assertive and nine

13:20

I said we ran a bit harder. They didn't

13:22

seem overawed by see having possessive no I didn't

13:24

seem bothered by an asshole which is crew crucial

13:26

against man said you've got to be comfortable as

13:28

your as they are because there's another city and

13:31

whatever she's actually because you've got to learn to

13:33

suffer as an as yet is where the wheel

13:35

they have. I just managed shuffling around really well

13:37

didn't they? I think see what rattled by as

13:39

well loving be Julie Ann Arbor as Mr. Chance

13:42

for the second half of the you think maybe.

13:44

I. Feel on a different I would have buried that I said

13:46

overseas to be wise after the fat with exotic but there

13:48

were there was a sense of late. Because.

13:51

it was too now i think they prophets of

13:53

how often do they even go to nail down

13:55

is already read even happens i think that was

13:57

a sense that they the game was get and

13:59

away from them. They're probably unfamiliar with that feeling.

14:01

So there was a little bit of a sense

14:03

that it was maybe a bit

14:05

hopeless and United did well to contain

14:08

them for so long really. I think obviously

14:10

you would think the goalkeeper, Ohana

14:12

had a really good game but he'd want to

14:14

do better on the Dokko Charles but it was essentially too little too

14:16

late wasn't it? It was impressive mentally from

14:19

United I thought. They didn't get sucked into this

14:21

idea that it's backs against the wall now. Oh

14:23

they're going to turn it around. We've got to

14:25

fight and fight and fight and just defend defend

14:27

defend. They were really calm and really assured them.

14:30

With so many young players in the thing that

14:32

was impressive. Yeah it was and I think that

14:34

calms as well and you saw that personified in

14:36

Maynooth's finish which capped off a lovely move. I

14:39

mean it was proper sweeping stuff. Man City will

14:41

have the possession but when you get your

14:43

chances spray it around Rashford knocks a lovely

14:45

one of course and Bruno Fernand's assist

14:48

Pete Donaldson. Oh, Cheers

14:50

kiss. It's a bit of

14:52

a shame though that they've not had

14:54

more moments like this

14:56

in their season because we

14:59

look at this result here and we look at how it was

15:02

taken and we sort of think well

15:04

what does this mean? Does this change

15:06

anything from just United because it's just

15:08

been such a long grueling season for

15:10

them. I just think emotionally I don't

15:12

think they're going to make

15:14

the most of it I suppose. They're not going to capitalise

15:16

on. Well they're in the Europa League because

15:18

of it. They are in the Europa League. It transforms their season

15:20

quite a lot I think you'd argue. Yeah I mean I think

15:24

that this you know it ends the season in

15:26

quite stunning fashion for Manchester United. It has been

15:28

disappointing but when you have some

15:30

of your young players and when you put a performance

15:33

like this it's spring and everybody step. I mean Maynooth.

15:35

I understand since basically those England friends I'm saying

15:38

he should be stark fragrant. Ah he's a bit

15:40

raw he's a bit I understand that. Every

15:43

time I see him play

15:45

within reason he puts in a very mature performance

15:47

but not only that every time he opens his

15:50

mouth in an interview I think how

15:52

old is this? He's not 18 is he? He's

15:54

so cool and that's so calm. As

15:56

I say personified in that finish just

15:58

strokes the ball in. Yeah, even

16:00

his part in you know earlier on in

16:02

the move where he's in quite a congested

16:04

part of the box and then plays it

16:06

To rashford. Yeah, he then sprays it out

16:08

to talk the garnaccio. I Never

16:12

really know with with mainly like where he's

16:14

eventually gonna end up. We have this conversation

16:16

a while ago I think before the England

16:18

call-ups where he's playing as a six,

16:20

but he's primarily an eight But he kind of

16:23

does what Declan Rice does a lot of the

16:25

time for Arsenal a little bit. Yeah Yeah, but

16:27

the the thing I find remarkable about him is

16:29

he sees the picture that we see on TV Even

16:32

though he's right in the center of this storm. He's

16:35

playing with a Google Glass. I said well That's probably

16:37

a good shout. Yeah, he's like he's played on PlayStation

16:40

Because he seems to know where all the angles are all

16:42

the little gaps to play the pass out why someone Yeah

16:46

should be investigated for that but Odd

16:50

coming from you Can't be happy

16:53

for too long. Can we you want to replay the game? How

16:57

very quickly after that second goal, yeah, how

16:59

much did all of us around the table

17:01

enjoy? Guardiola hugging

17:04

that water You're

17:08

right though, I think that was what you said

17:10

earlier false nine at the bottom of it Yeah,

17:12

you're right though. He was like they can bleed

17:14

they can be but and that that belief grows

17:17

and yet to have the lead It suddenly

17:19

is like right right. We're on here But

17:21

Guardiola himself said that that he got his

17:23

tactics wrong didn't he he was he was

17:25

approached him was quite odd I was

17:27

slightly surprised that he played Kovacic in there. I

17:29

thought he was gonna be a little bit more

17:31

I just felt for that. He it

17:33

was almost as if he thought okay. I've got

17:36

to be wary of them slightly Maybe I'll just

17:38

do that. I was myself. Why did you do

17:40

that? Well, you're just blowing teams away

17:42

I understand Manchester United are better than West

17:45

at you know West Ham who but basically on the

17:47

beach, you know Fulham who they hammered, you know But

17:50

but you had all that momentum. I Yeah,

17:52

it's easy for me to say of course where I'm

17:54

sat But I was slightly surprised that he was a

17:57

little bit more conservative felt like a sign of respect

17:59

to United midfield didn't to make it as tight

18:01

as possible with Rodri and Kovacic and Yeah,

18:04

I'm actually I'm more surprised at that

18:06

didn't work and the United seemed so

18:08

kind of comfortable in

18:11

the midfield for large periods of the games even though

18:13

they're obviously gonna dominate that I guess I suppose we

18:15

cover Chitch you have a bit less penetration Maybe

18:18

you got one less body further up the field perhaps,

18:20

you know, I mean again, of course you could play

18:22

for crying out loud You're a very impressive career. I

18:24

don't want to sort of pin it on him But

18:26

Guadioli, yeah I felt that they weren't as swarmy as

18:29

they had been and then obviously in the second half

18:31

he brings on docu doesn't he? Yeah, who makes a

18:33

difference? But if we're talking about individual performances, I thought

18:35

why not a soccer player really well Just a great

18:37

battle between the two but by and large I

18:40

thought he did a good job on docu Which

18:42

is very difficult stand out play for Manchester United

18:44

this season. Would that be fair? He's

18:47

had his criticism, but he has his criticism, but

18:49

he's also got very good attributes as a you

18:51

know A Premier League player. So I know what

18:54

you mean. He I think

18:56

when he was signed for Manchester United Everyone thought okay

18:58

Is he gonna kick on and maybe win some England

19:00

counts? Well, it turned out that there was you know

19:02

Rather a lot of competition in that in that particular

19:05

position I mean, you know with

19:07

with Wampus second, we know that on

19:09

one-on-ones that is where that's he

19:11

loves that doesn't he when when He

19:13

is it's not so much about the positional play per

19:16

se. It's about trying to Shuffle

19:18

the wing of one side and guess where

19:20

he's gonna go inside or outside Yeah,

19:23

he's better without the ball. Yeah, which is

19:25

why whenever United have games where they see

19:27

more the ball Dallow plays right back. Yeah,

19:29

and when they have games with when they

19:31

see less of the ball Wampus

19:34

as a plays right back because that's

19:36

threat because you know more of a defender's defender for

19:38

her Yeah, exactly. I think you know generally against those

19:40

teams. You're gonna get the left-winger cutting in

19:42

on his right first So you need someone who's a bit more

19:44

a bit more savvy defensive be

19:47

a bit more aware But yeah, you know what? I

19:49

thought the whole back line played really

19:51

well Well, it is yeah, the round was outstanding lovely

19:53

to see Johnny Evans coming on as well. Yeah Bonado

19:56

silver tackle Johnny Evans. I'm warming up Save

20:00

your energy, Bernard. I know. Yeah,

20:02

look, I mean, this is this is what happens when

20:04

you bring you take Casimir out the side and you

20:07

put in some actual defenders. You know, they look pretty

20:09

good back there. Well, yeah, even Amrabbat like I remember

20:11

about again, I remember that played really well. He

20:14

but he's really bad on the ball. But

20:16

he he was, you know, comfortably his

20:19

best performance for the Manse United.

20:22

Yeah, not the cleanest, but he made himself a news and throughout and

20:24

he seemed to grow into the game. And then

20:26

his legs fell to him in that counter the last

20:28

minute, which is quite enjoyable. Could be a clear out

20:30

of bald frauds, actually, you know, I could know. He's

20:33

probably on the way as well. I

20:36

also reckon you know, I will help by the

20:38

fact that I think that's

20:40

one of Kevin DeBruyn is worst games in a.

20:42

Yeah, yeah. Yeah, you have to say that they

20:45

were firing. It furthers the

20:47

big game butler and Kevin

20:50

DeBruyn. When they won the

20:52

champion's final, he went off early. Yeah, correct. That helped

20:54

them, if anything. Objectively

20:56

speaking, like I really watched the game

20:58

yesterday. And yeah, no,

21:01

I did. But also just for the show as

21:03

well. Yeah. I

21:05

found that a little bit sad because it feels like

21:07

he's on the way out. Well, it

21:09

feels like this is a product. This is a wider

21:11

conversation here. Yes. About

21:13

Stockholm Syndrome. Not sad. Yeah. Yeah.

21:17

He's he's at his he's at

21:19

his trophy. Yeah. Okay. You've

21:22

had your lot. But

21:24

like, but if you if you feel like the

21:26

amount of football he's played over the last three

21:29

years, like I was I was there at the

21:31

Euros quarterfinal. Yeah. When he was playing

21:33

on a busted ankle. When he was. Yeah. And

21:35

then he's basically played on top through that, aside

21:38

from breaks where he's had major injuries or

21:40

certainly injuries have kept him out for a while. That

21:42

was really like he looked kind of short of pace and

21:44

another thing kind of snap. When you're talking about one of

21:47

the best midfielders we've ever seen. Yeah.

21:49

Yes. It is. There

21:51

is a sort of a tinger sadness there. So that felt

21:53

like an exit performance. Yeah. I

21:55

get that. I do get that totally. I mean,

21:58

Man City themselves, as I say, pets. that

22:00

he made tactical mistakes and so he said, in the second

22:02

half they were better, but it was just a case of

22:04

Manchester trying to keep them out. And Dokko obviously, he does

22:06

score. I mean, Onano, who'd made a great save from Morgan,

22:08

had a very, very assured game. He's

22:10

got away with that, let's be honest, because that

22:12

was a poor error from him. It was, yeah.

22:14

It really was. But, you know, they

22:16

did their jobs for long enough, right? In terms of containing

22:18

it, because that second half, as you said, they were different,

22:21

they were on top a lot more. And I think, I

22:23

agree that Juan Bissaka had a good game, but he was busy.

22:25

He was only, Dokko occupied him, and he

22:27

made him really, really work. I mean, the goal was just for Dokko

22:31

having such a good performance. But that was the only

22:33

time Dokko got away from him, actually, because Juan Bissaka

22:35

had passed him on to Ghanacho, and it was Ghanacho

22:37

who didn't get the block in. But I agree, look,

22:39

you know, when all said and done,

22:42

those men seen out of place, put in a hell of a

22:44

ship, in terms of the bigger picture in the season, and

22:47

so on. I mean, I thought, actually, Alan Shearer did

22:49

pretty well on the BBC, when Ten Harg, and she

22:51

did a thing for Ten Harg, I thought to myself,

22:54

just bask in it. Like, just go and

22:56

go, yeah, we haven't been great this season, but did you enjoy

22:58

that? You see, it shows you that we've got it, but he

23:00

was still a bit prickly. Now, I understand that I'll never know

23:02

what it's like to be a Premier League manager, especially,

23:05

well, I'll just leave that there. I

23:07

don't need to say especially. Yeah, there are no clapping.

23:12

I don't know what it'll be like. Do you

23:14

think you manage us? Do you think we're a

23:16

manager? A play manager, maybe. No,

23:18

yes, clearly none of us know what it's like to have

23:20

that kind of pressure and to have all that kind of

23:23

chat. But by and large, the chat has been fair. You

23:26

know, the performances haven't been great. And so when he got

23:28

prickly and said, well, you know, we've just had lots of

23:30

injuries, well, some of other sides. OK, fine. But Alan Shearer

23:32

said, well, hang on, hang on, I get what you're saying,

23:34

but you finished eight, which is your worst, Manchester

23:37

United's worst ever finish in the Premier League. You've

23:39

got the European plays, if somebody finished six. I

23:41

know, right? Yeah. There's your conspiracy

23:43

theory. So,

23:46

you know, there are still question marks,

23:48

as you said earlier, Peter, when people say,

23:50

well, where was this performance for the majority

23:52

of the season? Well, for the majority of

23:54

the matches in the Premier League, Manchester United

23:56

are favourites. They are the bigger side. Actually,

23:58

your game plan in this... type of

24:00

match is quite obvious, you snodge it up, you

24:02

defend. And everyone has to have the performance of

24:04

their lives. And of course, when it's the final

24:06

day of the domestic season, if you like, with

24:08

the Cup Final, in terms of Premier

24:11

League, obviously the Championship Finals, the day after, the

24:14

player final, you know, the focus

24:16

is different. So to sort of say, well, where

24:19

was the intensity? I get that. But the fact

24:21

is, Tenharg didn't get any

24:23

of that consistency and that intensity

24:25

for vast majority of the

24:27

season. And with Sir

24:30

Jim Radcliffe and so on, he's not said, yeah,

24:32

the manager's staying, he's been very quiet on that.

24:36

To me, it's obvious that he's going to go

24:38

probably this week. We're reporting that he'd been sacked,

24:40

basically, and we would still take the team for

24:42

the final, but that seems to have just been

24:44

like forgotten about and ignored. Well, I think it's

24:46

really strange, Rob, but I do think we mentioned

24:48

this last week. I think it's

24:50

something like, you know, something like 14 centre

24:53

back pairings over the season. And yes,

24:55

every team gets injuries, but they have

24:57

had a particularly difficult run of them.

24:59

And obviously, the Jaden Sancho situation is

25:02

largely of his own making. The

25:04

Anthony situation was a poor choice by him in

25:07

terms of the money they spent on him and

25:09

etc, etc. There are definitely sticks beaten with. But

25:11

the fact is, if your best players aren't available, you

25:13

aren't going to be as good. And I do have

25:16

sympathy there. I don't think that should be dismissed completely

25:18

out of hand. Well,

25:20

but the aforementioned Newcastle, you know, I did have finished

25:22

two places above them. I mean, they've had their injuries,

25:24

you know, Liverpool, Liverpool, you know, I think United throughout

25:26

the season have had about they've had in excess of

25:29

60 absolute

25:31

60 different injuries or

25:33

illnesses over the course of the season.

25:36

Yeah, they've had there's no doubt

25:38

about that, but they've not looked like a

25:40

side who has then banded together and put

25:42

in performance. It is on him to. Yeah.

25:45

But I think it is. It's a quite extraordinary injury. Well,

25:48

it wasn't. I very much enjoy Shira on the touch line

25:50

at the moment because he's kind of like I think he

25:52

had to go pep the knee a few weeks ago. Did

25:54

he? Pep said talks about injuries. He said, well, just you've

25:56

got well, not to his face. He didn't say to his

25:58

face. I thought he did say it was. I thought

26:01

he was on the... Oh, never mind, anyway. But

26:03

having been enjoying Alan Shearer's kind of no-nonsense, everyone's

26:05

got injuries. Yeah. Just deal with it. From

26:08

a man who knows what it was like to get

26:10

injured. No, I was right. Look, I think... Yeah, Tenhaag

26:12

said, you know, if they don't want me, then I'll

26:14

go somewhere else to win trophies, because that is what

26:16

I do. Again, to me, I just think he became

26:18

a bit too sort of... too defiant, whereas actually, I

26:20

think he could have just maybe taken a step back.

26:23

Which players came back for this final, by the way,

26:26

as Wayne Rooney predicted? Yeah.

26:28

Remember, he said that everyone was pretending they were

26:30

injured off. That's true, isn't it? He didn't play

26:32

for you. Oh, suddenly everyone's back and everyone's winning

26:34

stuff, and I'm off to Plymouth. How

26:37

convenient. I'm

26:39

gutted he's going to Plymouth. I'm joining him

26:41

on Pundit. Yeah, I like him. I do

26:43

agree with you there. I think you'll be

26:45

back. He'll be back, don't worry. He'll

26:48

do the Euros, honey. I think he is doing the

26:50

Euros. ITV, yeah. Yeah, there's some good pundits. They

26:53

began on ITV. They could all do that. No,

26:55

Wayne's on the BBC, I think. Oh, he's

26:57

on the BBC? Yeah. I

26:59

think it's a really good thing that that Roger record has

27:01

been slain. Yes. What was the Roger record? That he hadn't

27:04

lost the game in like 3,000 years. OK.

27:06

Probably Euro. Yeah,

27:08

absolutely. No, that's enjoyable.

27:11

Also, it was a really lovely little moment

27:13

where you just forget quite

27:16

how heavily produced modern football

27:18

is. Where Lezandro Martinez had gone down

27:20

with Cramp, and they were using the

27:22

sort of super drone camera to

27:24

film it. You got like

27:26

a bird's eye view. A man having cramp.

27:29

Do we need this? We can have it,

27:31

but do we need it? Speaking

27:34

of injured men, did you see Casimir appeared to

27:36

miss the post-match celebrations as he flew off on

27:38

holiday straight after the game? That's a

27:40

man who wasn't confident in victory, was it? I

27:43

want to get the hell out of here. Book

27:45

me on a holiday. Thanks very much. Did you

27:47

say Clops off to Mallorca? I didn't read this.

27:49

Like, yeah, and Clops living in Mallorca now, I think.

27:52

To live? I think so. I think that's going to

27:54

be his base, apparently, unless I've read the headlines incorrectly.

27:57

But he just seems to be a very... Hang on, I got

27:59

it. I think so apparently unless I've

28:01

read the headlines. That's the best you're gonna get

28:03

out of me. I'm afraid So

28:06

so we he's either gone there on a holiday or there's

28:08

a chance he might have got there to live He's gone

28:10

there to live. Do you know there's a note fap on

28:12

your map? Yes,

28:16

I just think Mallorca of all the

28:18

places that a minted

28:21

Millionaire manager could go and he's gone off to

28:23

Mallorca. Just seems like a little suburb I won't

28:25

it a little area.

28:28

He loves playing paddle doesn't he? Everyone

28:30

loves playing paddle. Well, so and he's everybody. Yeah

28:33

every man. That's I wouldn't say that's a distinguishing

28:35

feature I say we should judge him for that.

28:37

Have you ever played it? No Keeps

28:41

you to play it keeps saying dude. You want to go

28:43

and play paddle and I'm like I Will

28:46

but and he couldn't get one of

28:48

the courts booked in in the South End So if you

28:50

know of how to book a car in

28:53

South End for bigger Apparently

28:55

so why you call it paddle? I thought it

28:57

was paddle if you're from some part of

28:59

the world. All right fine They've

29:02

managed to make a majority Yeah,

29:09

no apparently he's off to play paddle in Mallorca I've

29:13

just touched it. Well, he didn't Start

29:16

a new life in in Mallorca. Yeah

29:23

He's gonna live with his wife so it might be Will

29:27

ten hard join him soon. He might

29:29

do on ten hard. You're obviously talking about the reaction

29:31

to him It's

29:33

worth comparing ten

29:35

hogs kind of demeanor after the game to Lou

29:37

Van Hal's demeanor after the F a

29:39

cup follow that he won with man, you know

29:41

I've been a similar situation was at play where

29:43

he walked into the to the press conference after

29:45

the game and slammed the FA

29:48

Cup itself onto the table in front

29:50

of Catch

29:54

on he gave the cup a tea bag

30:00

Don't drink half of it now! But

30:02

Vanhal knew he was gone. Yeah. Which was

30:05

quite an extraordinary situation because Wayne Rooney said

30:07

that recently, didn't he, on another pod.

30:10

He said that Vanhal, it was

30:12

a bittersweet moment for him winning

30:14

the FA Cup. He's also quite

30:16

sad. Whereas Tenhar, the

30:19

decision hasn't been made, we're expecting it

30:21

imminently. So I

30:23

think that's why, all his

30:25

words, he's almost trying to plead with the board for

30:28

trying out like, I win trophies, I do this, I

30:30

do that. And I think they've already made up their

30:32

mind, let's be honest. Ratcliffe

30:34

is a man who

30:37

won't be persuaded by such things because

30:39

he doesn't seem to have an ounce of

30:41

compassion in his being. Not

30:44

that it's about compassion, I understand with regards to football,

30:46

but that was my way of saying he's a bit

30:48

of a dick. But

30:50

also, clearly with new owners, there's been a

30:52

whole clear out of staff everything, why would

30:55

they keep Tenhar there? Especially after their worst finish in

30:57

the Premier League, lest we forget. Can

30:59

I just ask this, you've now

31:02

sent Chelsea into the Conference

31:04

League, have you ever done that

31:06

and relegated Newcastle out of Europe

31:08

altogether? How has your brother taken

31:10

that? This is backfiring on

31:12

him quite spectacularly, isn't it? I actually

31:16

panicked and I didn't do this, but I was going to

31:18

send him a voice note, similar to the

31:20

ones he sends me. Do it now. You're

31:22

coward. I know he's bigger than you and harder than you. Yeah,

31:25

but he lives in South London, so I can

31:27

avoid him, I can still go out. I haven't

31:30

said it yet, but he messaged me during the

31:32

game and he's like, why

31:37

have you stopped playing shit, what are

31:39

you doing? So he took it well.

31:42

It's very enjoyable. Just

31:44

very quickly before we move on, did

31:47

anyone think there was anything off with

31:49

the Tenhar interview

31:51

with Shearer and Linekla? I

31:53

thought it was fine in terms of the way they

31:56

interviewed him. I thought it was fine, but it does...

32:00

It does speak to They were talking to

32:02

him in a way that was like. If.

32:04

You have had we would be to conceal others yet

32:06

as a we know yet how to bow and also

32:08

this to say yes. Weather. Has spoken to

32:11

pet like that because pets been some.

32:13

Because. Put that sort of the great is manageable

32:15

time that it and I mean well as with I

32:17

have might as well as it didn't a tactic run

32:19

the air and more. Daughter and I. Well.

32:22

Possibly of others. And it's is the. South

32:25

Africa you know I'm automatically idea

32:27

is that doctor from Barcelona. At

32:31

home care for him to big club now

32:33

our at the process on my thing. As

32:35

a result degrees I have a put out

32:37

across as good as feel like. Because

32:39

of the as we as we discussing

32:41

gonna go. On. A feel like that was

32:44

a. It was a more casual lead

32:46

into the and I didn't mind as he to the think

32:48

abou alone author as the citizens of what happened was. Linux.

32:50

Or os the fair question is it Then

32:52

When he responded in a prickly manner, that

32:54

was his opening gambit. And and

32:57

he responded in a was as if this is

32:59

linux Admitted he said look we've been harsher else

33:01

as well So he was say look. Them

33:03

that will are lots of this that with the

33:05

we've been awesome you because we have always says

33:07

that is exactly we always have we been to

33:09

be asked that look there you go to he

33:11

was basically side you use in in this match

33:14

you've answered. To. An extent some of you

33:16

critics if you if you will and youth and

33:18

you show us up here kind of thing. And

33:20

it was there. It's and Hobbes opportunity to go

33:22

well as in economy to say and and then

33:25

explain himself. but he didn't He went prickly. And

33:27

he said some stuff which was actually or well I see

33:30

you know we just been unlucky in you guys that you

33:32

been signed this but I see we be much better and

33:34

here said. When. I hang on that's but

33:36

the league table suggests know and I am

33:38

was right to point that out. I'm glad

33:40

he did because he went after I'm Roy

33:43

Keane of and his manager record I to

33:45

meet in the that was remote jovial driving.

33:47

Well he added a new it it and

33:49

you should really known Royce's that managerial career

33:51

Here eggs are not as yada yada yada

33:53

Juri says every love is this guy right

33:56

We'll see it doesn't bother her. I'm on.

33:58

Yeah very true. very true. Well. But

34:00

I did it a glorious finished the season

34:03

for much the lowest s and yes back

34:05

in the Europa league. Next season's shame that

34:07

new house won't be in it but term

34:09

in I gave them the brakes and a

34:11

did every bit. As you know because United

34:13

were playing at off this island recently in

34:16

Australia yourself so the new area little bit

34:18

of up an international flight over soon. So

34:20

long stuff and travel. To. The indices

34:22

and to see this is evils film

34:24

playing cricket the weekend the Us I

34:26

sincerely said he didn't travel is is

34:28

quite successfully pregnant but has out cricket.

34:30

Cricket wins know they do any good

34:32

speller people that are is very good

34:34

says the around a button alone reason

34:36

why people play cricket on Saturday. Is.

34:39

To get away from their lives right?

34:41

Yeah yeah same with else got golf

34:43

holiday lil the here is crazy law

34:45

people having various different years in various

34:47

stages of personal crisis is that my

34:49

producer are you crying this morning Exactly

34:51

at a lotta weekend that the Net

34:53

and I'm also going with Paul Costs

34:55

in general. It's. Ah

34:57

ah dear well as yet he was

34:59

he was very good he rise to

35:01

deliver their lives in the allow a

35:03

nevils the never look like a the

35:05

cricket our year before the advent of

35:07

whoever nice before and. You Flintoff, I'm

35:09

became the young sled play second level

35:12

where he valencia the previous are ya

35:14

this was for level ah interesting for

35:16

that. yeah you vacuum added my know

35:19

how can you know around a skill

35:21

and on. Yeah good Alpha Zaheer Ah.

35:24

Little. I like they're coming up in

35:26

the second off as a may get

35:28

another man's everybody my we will talk

35:30

about that said Leeds United loss in

35:32

the platform. And oh and there we

35:34

go. A couple of other cup phones as well, to

35:37

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37:33

Leads are in. The

37:35

championship again. Well

37:38

shit. That was a

37:40

football round, everybody. That

37:43

was patron subscriber Marie. Oh yes. We

37:46

were acting to the playoff final. We met Marie. We

37:48

did meet Marie. She was on good form. She

37:51

was on good form. Yeah, she'd been up to

37:53

see leads. She

37:56

won't be seeing them in the Premier League next season

37:58

sadly for Marie. and and all them well thank you

38:00

very much to marie for sending us that clip you

38:02

can become a friend of the ramble to by heading

38:05

over to patreon.com/football ramble you'll get access to the Discord

38:07

where you can chat with us and other ramble listeners

38:09

and get ad free episodes of the ramble up front

38:11

and on the Conson and right I was just

38:13

a bit confused because I thought it was Paris

38:16

Hilton because obviously Paris Hilton is famously leads fun

38:18

and famously from Southern America Paris

38:21

Hilton! But

38:23

those celebs often hide their real accents

38:25

anyway. Right. Yeah. Yeah. Like who? All

38:27

of them. Like well call one name

38:29

one then. If they all do it

38:31

you must know loads. Yeah but like I

38:33

don't know which one to name. Even the people who... He's

38:37

trying to tell me that Nick Hewitt doesn't sound like him. Precious

38:39

you sound like him, don't you?

38:41

Yeah. Nelson Mandela. In

38:44

Sleep with New York. Oh

38:46

no. No no no. Where's

38:48

my fucking people go asshole?

38:52

Get me off this island. Hey I'm walking

38:54

here. Look

38:59

I'm going to do a little read here. Have a

39:01

think which celebrities are faking their accents and I want

39:03

an answer. Loads of people. I'm in Limitless Blow. What's

39:05

his name? Bradley Cooper. Him.

39:09

Where's Bradley Cooper from then accent wise?

39:11

He's from France isn't he? Gerard

39:14

Butler. He always hides it. He's

39:16

Scottish American. Do you mean acting? Robot

39:21

cop. He sounded like a weird robot.

39:25

He had his face blasted off. Unbelievable. The

39:27

guy who plays the scientist from Short Circuit.

39:29

There you are. Ahh. David

39:33

Beckham's biographer. Friend

39:36

and designer. Oh yeah. Right

39:38

it's time for an update on our

39:40

Football Ramble Epic Up Final Bet-Builder with

39:43

Betfair. Jim selected over 1.5 first half

39:45

goals. There were two first half goals. We got

39:47

that one right. Fish

39:50

picked Phil Foden to score. He didn't score. Pete

39:52

chose over 3.5 corners for Manchester United. They only

39:54

got one corner. They won and they only

39:56

got one corner. This is why they

39:58

shouldn't be in any European. competition. Yeah, they let

40:01

everyone down all the time. They love corners on

40:03

the continent, don't they? And I chose Man City

40:05

to lift the trophy. Well,

40:07

it was Man City United who lifted the trophy.

40:09

So one out of four picked four. Unfortunately,

40:12

we didn't win that. So

40:14

no glory for

40:17

us in our football ramble, FA Cup

40:19

final bit builder with Betfair sadly. Nevermind.

40:22

We go again. Right.

40:25

Well, Leeds United fans, here we

40:27

go. Leeds United zero, Southampton won.

40:29

Glory, glory for the South Ghost team.

40:32

Leeds are in the

40:34

championship. They are Peter. Southampton though

40:36

returned to the Premier League on the first time

40:38

of asking. Last time they were relegated to the

40:40

Championship of course was in 2005 where they took

40:42

seven seasons to return to the

40:44

top flight. That also included them going down to

40:46

league one. The thing that gets me is that

40:48

we're going to, the Southampton won't go back down

40:50

from the Premier League. They'll stink up the place

40:53

and we'll have three more seasons of them and

40:55

then they'll go down. Why would they stink

40:57

up the place? They just were the stinky

40:59

team. An ascendant Newcastle United could beat them

41:01

9-0 though. Exactly. We could enjoy that. Yeah,

41:04

we beat Sheffield United 8-0 last season.

41:06

So away from home. So 9-0 could

41:08

be on the horizon. 10-0. The romance

41:10

of the Premier League. Lou Grecken's attendance

41:12

on the horizon. But I felt

41:14

for Leeds because to say they didn't turn up

41:17

isn't really accurate. I think they were quite good

41:19

for the first half an hour, 20 minutes or

41:21

something like that. But they didn't create enough. They

41:23

didn't create enough. They didn't create enough. And Wembley

41:25

is a bit of an albatross. They haven't won

41:28

at Wembley since, I think it was called

41:30

the Charity Shield back in those days. In 1992. 1992. They

41:36

do not do well at Wembley. No. And the

41:38

fans brought in on that idea, I really believe

41:40

that. They

41:42

didn't really get anything going. It was

41:44

a real shame. A real shame. For

41:47

Leeds? For Leeds. Come on, Southampton won

41:49

this. They did win that. Southampton were

41:51

really comfortable off the ball and in

41:53

defence though, didn't they? They really didn't seem to mind

41:55

when Leeds were kind of probing and trying to figure

41:57

them out a little bit. I mean, obviously Dan just

42:00

James hit the bar and an inch

42:02

lower and it's one all but that

42:04

was really the best chance they managed

42:07

to conjure and yeah just Southampton looked

42:09

so so comfortable. Adam Armstrong looked absolutely just

42:11

overawed by the situation at the end it

42:13

was like a man like in a complete

42:16

reverie it was a beautiful thing to see.

42:18

I also think he looks like he could

42:20

play a sort of warrior monk in a

42:23

historical drama like in that I do like

42:25

that he may have to change his

42:27

accent of course. But that's what

42:29

some actors do. Yeah yeah yeah. Took

42:31

his goal superbly well. Lovely through ball. It felt

42:33

like he thought he was offside but thought I'll

42:35

just tuck it away. One

42:38

of those finishes have a lot of it about this weekend. As

42:42

you say I'll just I'll swing at this thinking

42:45

I'll probably score whereas if

42:48

you get that chance and you sort of panic it was

42:50

none of that kind of stuff it was a crisp one

42:52

and that decided the game of course. The third time Southampton

42:54

have beaten Leeds this season it's fair to say they have

42:56

their number Adam Armstrong's

42:58

fourth goal against Leeds this season. So it

43:00

was all there for Southampton of course and

43:03

interestingly obviously Russell Martin and Southampton manager played

43:05

under Fark at Norwich. The real drama is

43:07

in the dugout isn't it or certainly the

43:10

back story of the drama is in the

43:12

dugout. It seems to be absolutely fine between

43:14

them and everyone desperately seems to want to make this. Yeah

43:18

well if you're Russell Martin not having

43:21

this. If you're acting

43:23

nervous. That wasn't actually Daniel Farkner. Not

43:25

a real accent. That's how Jim should

43:27

talk. This nonsense that we hear every

43:29

week we want to hear the real Jim. Alex Lewis also

43:32

a good actor. Very good actor yeah. I

43:35

mean Hargreaves number one you know what

43:37

is his accent we don't know. We're still trying to

43:39

figure it out but we like the man a lot.

43:41

Yeah. All right have a bit of respect. Finally we

43:43

like the man. Well I liked

43:45

him a lot earlier Jim but I take the point

43:47

what you're saying. But back to Farker and Martin I

43:50

think if Martin just looks at Farker's head he's like

43:52

this man is not someone I want to get physical

43:54

with at all. Why if

43:56

you if you kind of like tilt him one way he's

43:58

just gonna go down. It's got

44:01

to weigh everything out. He's

44:04

like those little football figures that we used to have in the night. Well,

44:07

yes, we put it like that. Russell

44:09

deck him next time. But,

44:11

yeah, so Russell Martin and Sal Hampton, I

44:13

mean, it was an interesting appointment when

44:16

he took the Sal Hampton job, of course, at

44:18

the start of the season. He was saying that

44:20

he thanked Jason Wilcox, among others, for

44:22

taking the chance, because as he put it, it wasn't

44:24

a sexy appointment. I thought to myself, you know, in

44:26

terms of football philosophy, I think he's a beautiful man,

44:28

he's a nice handsome beard. But his

44:31

style of football has been talking

44:34

points, because a lot

44:36

of possession, possession-based, although as you say, Jim, in the

44:38

final, they didn't have most of the possession, they adapted

44:40

very well to that. But there's

44:43

been chat that the final product

44:45

has not been there, which is Swansea Manager, where

44:47

we know they're like a bit of possession-based stuff.

44:50

But at Sal Hampton, I mean, they amassed 87 points,

44:52

which is good. And we said there's about

44:54

Leeds getting 90 points, and it's only sometimes going

44:56

to be good enough to win the Damned Division. 87

44:59

points is often good enough to go up automatically

45:01

as well. Yeah, I feel like they were also

45:03

helped by the fact that that front three pulled

45:05

away quite early, and so they

45:07

could almost just concentrate on winning the rest of the league.

45:10

And there was never that real, apart from the

45:12

back end, when, you know, the

45:15

top three started falling away, and Sal Hampton started making

45:17

up ground on them, there was maybe a moment when

45:19

they were like, oh, shit, if they'd fuck up any

45:21

further, maybe we could sneak in here. Is

45:24

this really not just evidence

45:27

that the parachute payments from the Premier League are

45:29

distorting the championship? Oh, yeah, definitely. I

45:32

mean, there's been a lot of scrutiny over the

45:34

parachute payments, of course. Maybe to a point, but I

45:36

feel like it's also the fact that those

45:39

teams were able

45:41

to hold on to a few players when they

45:43

got relegated. Yeah, yeah. Leeds were in a... Obviously,

45:46

they're about to enter the storm now, with the

45:48

guys having to sell a few of these players.

45:51

But Leeds lucked out in the fact that

45:53

Somerville, Nonto... Yeah, you would have thought they

45:55

were absolute certs to Leeds, but no. Yeah,

45:57

well, I mean, Nonto went on strike at

45:59

the start. this season and was welcome back

46:02

but... But look at someone like Carl Walker

46:04

Peters at Southampton. You know he's

46:06

a good player. Yeah, very good, yeah. At the

46:08

end of the keep, he keeps... If you start

46:10

losing one or two of these players, it can

46:12

be quite demoralising. But even when Southampton signed Armstrong

46:14

in their last season in the Premier League, I

46:16

think we, maybe even I myself, we

46:19

talked about their... Essentially, their transfer dealings.

46:21

It's almost like they're preparing for the championship.

46:23

Yeah, do you think that's codified into the

46:25

players' contracts though?

46:27

Obviously, you take

46:29

a step down when you lose Premier

46:31

League status, but maybe modern contracts just

46:33

don't look like that anymore. If

46:36

you're a team that generally you're yours,

46:38

you're buying a player that needs to

46:40

fulfil both sides of the coin. Well,

46:42

I think that is the case, although...

46:45

The camera really does look like a roundabout,

46:47

right? Absolutely. Yeah, obviously because it's a pay

46:49

decrease from the pay increase when they get promoted.

46:52

But I think, you know, like, I keep

46:54

less than I haven't gone up. Which,

46:56

it's kind of seems unfathomable given their squad, but

46:58

if they hadn't gone up, they would be

47:01

in serious strife. I mean, they're already looking at a

47:03

bit of a problem next season, but some of their

47:05

wages and their squad are ridiculous. But

47:08

if you're a player who knows that he's working for

47:10

a club who's going to get those parachute permits, you'd

47:12

be well wouldn't be able to say, I'm not taking

47:14

a pick up. You'd be back up next season if

47:16

we all stick around. So, you know, pick

47:18

up the gun. Yeah, although, not that you were saying this by

47:20

the way, but I think sometimes people seem to think the Southampton

47:22

are a bit of a yo-yo club, but they're not. They

47:25

actually, as I say, the last time they're relegated, well, they've

47:27

just got a really long string. When

47:30

they go all the way, they really do go quite far down.

47:32

Yeah, I know what you mean. So I think

47:34

they'll be tricks at the top. Oh,

47:36

nice. Yeah, like yo hands. That

47:39

was the yo-yo guy from the 90s.

47:41

Oh, yeah. Do not remember that. I

47:43

could do a cat's cradle. I could

47:45

do around the world. I could do around the world. Yeah, nice. Nice.

47:49

Could you walk the dog? Walk in the dog. That was

47:51

a tricky one. That was always quite cool. Should we all

47:53

get yo-yos, guys? We'll bring them back.

47:55

Do you remember the Sprite Fanta and Coca-Cola one?

47:57

Yeah, certainly. I saw someone

47:59

with a gold Coca-Cola one. once.

48:02

Wow, the mayor. Yeah, it was

48:04

the mayor of Edinburgh. We should

48:06

bring them back for the live

48:08

show. Yeah, let's do a little

48:10

choreograph. A

48:14

lot. Lovely. Anyway, the point you

48:16

were making was that Southampton were in the Premier

48:18

League for ages the last time they were there.

48:21

Correct. And I think that there will be huge

48:23

relief because as I say, the last time they

48:25

went down, they really did plummet. So

48:27

going straight back up and

48:31

I mean, Russell Martin has said with regards to

48:33

next season, well, actually, first off, when he went

48:35

over to chat to the guys at Sky Sports,

48:37

they said, you're a Premier League manager, how does

48:39

it feel? He went, well, I might be sacked

48:41

tomorrow, which is quite funny. But he said that

48:43

he won't compromise on the style of

48:46

Southampton's playing, which

48:48

is something we're seeing more these recent

48:51

seasons, aren't we? Recent years in English

48:53

football. And I know people

48:56

on mainland Europe would probably laugh at us saying, oh,

48:58

you're playing a possession style and you're going to do

49:00

that. The bigly well done. We've been doing that for

49:03

decades or whatever. But, you know, for an English man,

49:05

well, Scottish international, a British manager saying

49:07

that, you know, and he's going to have a

49:10

go. It does show you, even though we've

49:12

been very, very slow in responding to that particular

49:14

trend in football. It

49:16

does show you that the times are a change

49:18

in. But this is a quite incredible stat. No

49:20

team in England have had a greater share of

49:23

possession than Southampton's average of 66.1%. So

49:26

it does show you how they've set out their stall. And

49:29

again, it shows you in the final how

49:31

they managed to respond. I think Leeds had 56% possession.

49:36

So it will be, you know, they're

49:38

going to need a big transfer window. We know this, you're going

49:40

to have to spend money and they're going to have that money,

49:42

of course. Will Russell Martin

49:45

be there? I sincerely hope so, because it's quite an

49:47

exciting thing. You know, we know Kieran McKenna, apparently the

49:49

reports are suggesting he's turned down Chelsea and he wants

49:51

to say it's which, which if those reports are true,

49:53

and I appreciate five minutes after we finished recording, he

49:56

might be unveiled as new bloody Chelsea manager, but that

49:58

is what we're going on at the moment. That's

50:00

great to see Ross and my these are big clubs You

50:03

know have a go kind of thing the thing

50:05

the thing with sounds and that is quite interesting

50:07

though is Despite that

50:09

those possessions that they

50:11

did concede 63 goals last year Yeah,

50:13

which is you know, which is a problem and

50:15

they're not gonna get that no the premier They're

50:17

sorry that percentage of possession. They're not gonna

50:19

get that in the Premier League So what they have what

50:21

they do end up with they've got to be more efficient

50:24

with essentially So I

50:26

mean I think he's saying all the right things and I don't necessarily

50:28

think we need to hold him to what he says The

50:30

moment after they get the mode of course back to

50:33

the Premier League But I

50:35

suppose that's what the summer's voice as much for a criminal is

50:37

he sitting down with the pen the pan

50:39

again and going Right. How do we do this? Yeah,

50:41

because opportunity If

50:44

you start has been a talking point and

50:46

someone says or you know, how you're gonna go up and so

50:48

on I mean you may well have volunteered this information. He's not

50:50

gonna go. Yeah, I think we're just gonna we're gonna do something

50:52

totally different Of course, he's gonna you know be defined. You know,

50:54

they've just gone out for current lab They've won the

50:57

most lucrative game in in world football and and one

50:59

of the best ones to win by the way Take

51:01

over someone with experience And

51:04

and and and good luck to them quite

51:06

frankly and and and the surprising thing For

51:10

some people as well It

51:12

was the Aaron Ramsdale was spotted in the Southampton

51:15

and dressed as which character? What

51:18

why was this He

51:24

just loves the banks, doesn't he I

51:27

think I can't figure it out I think he's really good friends with

51:29

David Brooke he is Why

51:33

would you why would you Yeah,

51:38

you want to disguise that doesn't draw attention

51:40

to yourself I'm just guys as you well

51:42

everyone's got who's that bloke Oh, hang on.

51:45

He loves it. He does. I mean really It's

51:48

a very basic explanation, but I do think it

51:50

is the explanation. He just loves it.

51:52

Yeah He loves life. Yeah,

51:54

sometimes the simple answer is the right. Oh,

51:56

yeah. I know six foot two was

52:00

quite big isn't it? Yeah, well it's ideal, I'm

52:02

just saying. It's ideal. He should have gone as

52:04

kind of like PS2 era low polygon Hagrid.

52:07

I think it would be more impressive. True. But

52:10

it's nice for them to have a, what is ultimately

52:12

a celebrity fan because Leeds had

52:14

a lot of celebrity fans wishing them well

52:16

like the aforementioned Paris Hilton and Will Ferrell

52:18

who's an investor now isn't he? Yeah, he

52:20

is. They've already been looking into

52:23

a very exciting young play called Moore Cowbell

52:25

apparently. But

52:31

it's a damning loss for Leeds. The

52:34

sixth attempt at going up through the play.

52:36

They just need to understand that

52:39

the play's just out and open for them and they need to

52:41

win the league by a million points. So they should have just

52:43

thrown the towel and got out. You know what lads? Look

52:46

out in the luten. They went down eventually. Give Norwich a

52:48

bite at the final with, you know, we're not up for

52:50

this. In all seriousness they have to

52:53

start again. Yeah, the

52:57

kind of scare story is that they need to

52:59

raise a hundred million pounds for player sales. I

53:01

don't know who that is. But presumably there's

53:03

some level of truth to it. Well I don't

53:06

know. I mean obviously Chris St. Samuelville and

53:08

Willy Nontay will probably raise good fees. But when

53:10

everyone knows that you need to raise a hundred

53:12

million quid, they're going to lowball you, right? Indeed.

53:14

Because you need some money. So yeah, it's going

53:17

to be a tricky time. They're going to have

53:19

to be smart. The

53:21

4-0 win in the previous round could

53:23

not have come at a worse time,

53:25

turns out. I thought it was perfect

53:27

because it was showing momentum. It turns out it's

53:30

not sure a bit of a pawny, aren't they? Yeah, I...

53:35

It's a real shame. Must have been

53:37

my absolute gut. But great first Southampton

53:39

and Rishi Sunak. Yeah,

53:41

he didn't turn up in there, did he?

53:44

He didn't turn up. He's got other things on him. He's

53:47

come in and soggy. He's probably...

53:49

Please stay away. Right, close. Matt

53:52

LaTissie was there of course. Yeah. You'd

53:55

expect that. Yeah, sat next to Adam LaLana. I

53:57

hadn't realised LaLana's exit was so acrimonious that they've...

54:00

punished him like that. I'm

54:04

just the worst seat with his kind

54:06

of pedigree and his rep. Oh my

54:08

god. You got the Wi-Fi password? Oh

54:11

no. I'm

54:14

not falling for that one. I'm not falling for

54:16

that one. Fine. It would have

54:18

been... Imagine that you get out of your

54:20

phone to check the time or something and

54:22

you're like, oh, you got one of those

54:24

of you? Yeah. For

54:27

fuck's sake. Turn that off now. You

54:29

like people's fun on you, do you? Lovely day, isn't it?

54:33

See how long that lasts. Oh,

54:35

bloody door. I'm just pointing out for a

54:38

bit. Chemtrails, 20 or 70. Oh

54:42

dear. I'd rather... It's

54:44

the CBD. You're

54:49

well born over here. A little bit

54:51

of heart and blood. Stop, mate. You're gonna

54:53

ruin your teeth. Gummy,

54:55

gummy, gummy. Oh

54:58

dear. Here's a little

55:01

story that I don't

55:03

think it will cheer Leeds fans up at all, but

55:05

it might just give them a flicker of a strong one. Man's United

55:07

when they f-ache up on the back. Good

55:11

for the area. Alan, for

55:14

the pen-eyed. Imagine I'd end up... You

55:16

know, it's good for the Northern Powerhouse. Very good. Very

55:20

good indeed. Masala Beelza. Let's

55:24

go there, all the way to Uruguay. He's

55:26

been creating a storm

55:28

down there because he's called up an amateur

55:30

player for his latest Uruguay score. Mental Uruguay.

55:32

Well, there's a bit more to it than that. Walter

55:35

Dominguez is the man in question. He's been called up

55:37

to the squad to play Costa Rica on Saturday. He

55:39

scored over 50 goals this season, but it is in

55:41

an amateur league. But there is

55:43

a little bit more detail to

55:45

this than what meets the eye.

55:47

He's an unofficial son. Yeah, yeah,

55:49

yeah. It's an unofficial friendly

55:51

because it's outside of the UEFA window.

55:55

So you can only... they're only choosing domestic

55:57

players, right? Only Beelza would seek friendly to...

55:59

the black bar. Come on, let's do it.

56:01

Exactly. Exputed territory. Come on. We're away to

56:09

Somaliland. We're doing Legoland. We're going

56:11

to film over. We're going to

56:14

go there, we're going

56:17

to play a friend, we're all going to get driver's licence, we're

56:19

going to go. Although

56:24

apparently the Uruguay FA are going to

56:26

have the ultimate sound who goes or

56:29

not. I hope that

56:31

Walter Dominguez isn't disappointed. He has had the

56:33

phone call and he has had the chat

56:35

and he's had the interview and saying, oh,

56:37

I'm very excited to know it. Yes, yes,

56:39

funnily enough, I didn't expect the phone call.

56:41

He's one of the answers he gave to

56:43

when asked about this. And also the big

56:45

sides in Uruguay are currently on Copa

56:47

America, not Copa America, sorry, L'Hôtres

56:50

and Sudamericano, all the

56:52

continental trophies. And

56:54

as I say, they're only picking domestic players,

56:57

even though that is all

56:59

the case, it's still a huge surprise. Amazing.

57:01

This being the other way, I kind

57:03

of feel like it's going to work.

57:05

Yeah, he's going to pretty well in

57:07

him. Yeah, I reckon. I reckon that

57:09

he sees, like his whole ethos

57:12

is about this, isn't it? Yeah. Like the thing he did

57:14

at Leeds was like, well, I'm going to lift every

57:17

single player. It doesn't matter how bad you

57:19

might have seen in the previous life. And

57:21

whoever fits in that system and he's watching

57:23

the videos of various players and

57:26

thinking, I like the way the guy runs, I can

57:28

get a tune out of him. And this would be

57:30

the ultimate tune. Yeah. It's

57:33

mad. How cool would it be if you

57:35

are Walter Dominguez? Oh my goodness. Yeah. He's

57:37

24, by the way. So he's also young,

57:39

but he's not like 18. Hossa

57:42

Lewis. You

57:44

might have a great career after this. Walter Dominguez is

57:47

going to get a couple in

57:49

the Cop America semi-finals. Yeah. That

57:52

would be quite something. Yeah. So Bill's up

57:54

to his old tricks there.

57:56

Gentlemen, there were some other Cup finals that happened

57:58

in Europe over the weekend. but we're gonna

58:00

stay in Britain for the first one. Joe

58:03

Hart won his final game in professional

58:05

football as Celtic beat Rangers 1-0 in

58:07

the Scottish Cup final. Hail, hail. LAUGHTER

58:11

Jack Butland with the fumble in the other net. I

58:13

know! A power of Joe Hart. Yeah, well, Joe Hart,

58:15

Rangers did score a goal, but there was a bit

58:17

of a push on Joe Hart. So

58:20

I thought it was a foul. I

58:22

thought it was soft, funny, that. Do you think? LAUGHTER

58:24

I look like a glance, ain't it? LAUGHTER Didn't he

58:26

watch it? Didn't he watch it? He described it over

58:29

the phone to me. And also, his every chance, the

58:31

highlights you were watching, were not of this old firm

58:33

gag. So it seems to be something you do not

58:35

know. There's not many of them every season. That's true,

58:38

yeah. I think I'm asking the NBA for this best

58:40

of seven playoff they're having, isn't it? Yeah, Joe Hart

58:42

said after the game, there was nowhere else on the

58:44

planet that I'd want to play football. He's

58:47

been online on all places. Do

58:49

you think that speaks to, I suppose, a

58:51

little bit of ignorance of how big the

58:53

old firm is? Because Joe Hart

58:55

would have started his career at Man City,

58:58

playing for England, thinking, this is my

59:00

life from now on. And he's basically hit a

59:02

few branches on the way down, and, you know,

59:05

fair play to him has finished his career. A

59:07

place where he's loved and he's winning stuff. Oh, it

59:11

is a massive, massive game, isn't it? Sort of

59:13

joking aside. Yeah. It's

59:17

the biggest derby in Britain, isn't it? By some

59:19

distance, one of them in the world. Yeah, yeah. He's

59:22

played more matches for Celtic than he has any

59:24

other club apart from Manchester City. Well, yeah. There

59:26

you go. That should be his... He's definitely played

59:28

more for Celtic than his first. Yeah,

59:31

I'd give him that. And Torino. Yeah, well,

59:33

I think we said this, didn't we, when he announced

59:35

that he was going to retire at the end of

59:37

the season, that one can forget he was a very good

59:40

golker. He was. Of course, it's 75 England

59:42

caps, but some of the performances for Man City, and

59:44

there's one of the training pitches or one of the

59:46

facilities named after him in the Manchester

59:48

City Academy. You know, he's a Manchester City legend,

59:50

if I may say. I mean, maybe some of

59:52

their fans don't say that. But I think that

59:54

is a recognition that he is. I mean, he's

59:56

playing a big part in getting them to the

59:58

status they have now. Totally. Yeah, and as we

1:00:00

said at the time when he when he announced his

1:00:02

retirement, he went around the houses and I

1:00:04

felt You know, yeah

1:00:07

when when Guardiola goes there, you know to

1:00:09

heart's time was was up fine and obviously

1:00:11

in terms of England You know, he's not been

1:00:13

the number one for many many years But

1:00:15

a very very good goalkeeper a Premier League quality

1:00:17

level goalkeeper But just couldn't find a home he'd go

1:00:19

on loan to place it then and he said and

1:00:21

then when he went to Spurs where He was second

1:00:24

choice or in third choice at

1:00:26

times. Yeah, it felt like okay He's now quite

1:00:29

early gone into the sort of the Scott Carson

1:00:31

or the Rob Green kind of routine and

1:00:33

but that was never Joe Hart wasn't really not

1:00:35

and it's good that he reestablished definitely. Yeah It

1:00:39

was surprising that he didn't straight away when he left

1:00:41

Man City Obviously was a goalkeeper that still had a

1:00:43

lot left to give and it is a fitting end

1:00:45

that he ends as a winner Yeah at one of

1:00:47

the biggest clubs in the land quite frankly

1:00:50

I did get a sneaking feeling that well, I

1:00:52

think maybe when Southgate was watching one of the

1:00:54

games Oh, yeah, maybe he'd be like the third

1:00:56

choice keeper Yeah, I think it's

1:00:58

more likely to be butland actually from yeah, of

1:01:00

course. Yeah, but one last job

1:01:06

One last chance to shout at a ball boy Give

1:01:10

it to him. Yeah, that's true. That's true Let's

1:01:13

say let's go to Germany by Leva Kuzin

1:01:15

completed the domestic double which which

1:01:17

ensure they won two out of the three trophies I mean, yeah,

1:01:19

as I said, they were always gonna be Second-tier

1:01:21

kinds of slough and although they were down to

1:01:23

ten men just before halftime. Yeah, and they still

1:01:25

made it hard They made it interesting, which is

1:01:27

yes Played it on hard

1:01:30

mode. They did like a lovely lovely goal

1:01:32

from Granite Jack and again, the cup is

1:01:34

brilliant Isn't it the actual trophy itself? So

1:01:36

so cool. Yeah, really great but I think

1:01:38

like an unbeaten domestic season is an incredible

1:01:41

thing and it's tempting to I

1:01:44

think we'll forever look on this season and Think

1:01:46

I such a shame they didn't win, you know

1:01:48

The Europa League final as well, but you know,

1:01:50

you have to forget that and

1:01:53

look at what an astonishing Achievement

1:01:55

this is it it might never be done

1:01:57

again. Yeah. Well, this is a lovely pick-me-up

1:01:59

game I think if this was before the Europa League,

1:02:01

that would have been a shame. It would have been a shame if

1:02:03

they had finished on bad notes. I think this was a fitting end.

1:02:06

People thought they were going to steamroll the cards and said,

1:02:08

I understand that, but as the game goes... But also, you

1:02:10

saw the nervousness. Because again, with Manchester City, when

1:02:12

they say, oh, they can bleed and all that sort of stuff.

1:02:15

Having gone 51 games unbeaten, you

1:02:18

then get beaten, but not just, oh,

1:02:21

we were unlucky, like comprehensively beaten. You

1:02:23

then have a bit of a wobble. And actually, this would

1:02:25

have been a great relief for Leverkusen,

1:02:28

because had they have lost this game, it would have

1:02:30

been a bit embarrassing against the side, who was quite

1:02:32

clearly inferior. But also, the season would

1:02:34

have finished on a damp squib, and yes, obviously by

1:02:36

Leverkusen and all that kind of stuff, it's been put

1:02:38

to the side because of that stunning league campaign.

1:02:42

But had they have lost this one as well, oh,

1:02:44

that would have been a bit embarrassing. So it was

1:02:46

very, very important that they won it, of course. It's

1:02:48

only six kilograms. The cup,

1:02:50

even though it looks 10 times heavier than

1:02:53

that. Oh. There you go. So it's

1:02:55

all hollow inside. It's hollow, like winning it,

1:02:58

clearly. It looks like it was found in

1:03:00

an Egyptian tomb. It was, yeah. It looks

1:03:02

like... It's a bit infinity glovey, isn't it?

1:03:04

Yeah, yeah. Oh. Yeah. That's

1:03:07

exactly it, yeah. They've got good

1:03:09

cups over there. Good cups. The Jovis and Jovis. Yeah,

1:03:11

yeah. They're not getting this one all day. Can

1:03:16

we talk about it? Can we do them over? They can

1:03:18

have it for a bit. Yeah. They can look

1:03:20

after it. Yeah. Put

1:03:22

it on that little plinth. Yeah. Keep

1:03:25

it safe. Yeah. And then don't touch it. I

1:03:28

can't wait until we can really lean into the

1:03:30

nationalism here. You're

1:03:33

not in one of the FA Cup. It's going to be so good.

1:03:36

Well, after all that sort of stirring

1:03:38

passion at all, let's now

1:03:40

turn our attention to Portland Timbans. Fucking hell.

1:03:42

Jesus Christ. Oh my god. There's no reason

1:03:45

to do this. Oh god. Isn't there? He's

1:03:48

turning things round, old fizzer. They've won

1:03:50

two out of three games since that.

1:03:52

Three games. Three games.

1:03:54

You were just talking about how it would be

1:03:57

a damp squib if Levakus had lost the cup

1:03:59

rylor. after winning the league

1:04:01

for the first time by going

1:04:03

unbeaten. Two out

1:04:05

of three. We

1:04:07

should be saying, lost the middle one. Two

1:04:10

out of three. You know, I just

1:04:13

think he's turning things around, yeah. That's half of

1:04:15

the game. Well,

1:04:17

he can't even turn it around, throwing it at your

1:04:19

friend's degree. That usually does. They're

1:04:22

up to ten. Ten? How

1:04:24

many's in the league? Up to ten?

1:04:26

A point of the playoffs. Up

1:04:29

to ten. We've got into the

1:04:31

opponent's half. Show some

1:04:33

fucking respect. It's actually

1:04:35

14 teams. Up to ten. Up

1:04:39

to ten. The

1:04:41

goal difference of minus two. Two

1:04:45

in three. No

1:04:47

danger of relegation

1:04:49

there is no... I'll

1:04:51

point out that FC Dallas have only played 13 matches. St.

1:04:56

Louis have played 14 and Portland have played 15. So

1:05:00

that may very well be a massage position

1:05:03

there. Right, okay. Help me out. Fizzer.

1:05:06

Fizzer, come on. I'm really trying to scrape

1:05:08

the barrel for you here. Right, well, let's

1:05:10

finish on that note, shall we? It was

1:05:12

cut final weekends and a victory for Portland

1:05:15

Timbers. There we are. Everyone's happy. Everyone is

1:05:17

happy. Thank you very

1:05:19

much for listening to the Football Realm, part of the ACAR Scrater

1:05:21

Network. Join myself, Pete, Vish

1:05:23

and Andy on Wednesday. No. For

1:05:26

another Football Realm, it's going to be a classic. I promise

1:05:28

you that. Follow us on

1:05:30

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1:05:33

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1:05:35

and Instagram at footballravel. And follow us

1:05:37

on Spotify. Thank you, Vish. Thank you. Thank

1:05:40

you, Pete. I've just bought four of yours on Amazon. Thank you,

1:05:42

Jim. Thank you. And

1:05:44

thank you Manchester United. Who

1:05:55

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1:05:57

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