0:01

I'm excited to tell you that one

0:03

of our favorite radiotopia siblings, Ear Hustle,

0:05

is back with a new season. Ear

0:07

Hustle is a show about life

0:09

inside prison, but it's not your

0:12

typical prison podcast. Co-host Nigel Poor

0:14

and Erlon Woods have recently been

0:16

spending time at four California prisons

0:18

and have a season's worth of

0:20

funny, surprising, and unforgettable stories to

0:22

share. In a recent episode, they

0:24

were able to visit a groundbreaking

0:26

prison hospice where they spoke to

0:28

men who are grappling with the

0:30

reality of dying inside prison. Also

0:33

coming up this season are stories

0:35

about the objects people keep inside

0:37

their prison cells, complicated mom-daughter relationships

0:39

in prison, and incarcerated people who

0:41

wonder whether they've become too comfortable

0:44

behind bars. Stories about

0:46

life on the inside, told by those who

0:48

live it. Find Ear Hustle wherever you get

0:50

your podcasts. Well,

0:53

let's just start, settle

0:55

in, have you introduce yourself for us.

0:57

My name is Lewis and I am

0:59

a can of GoToKola. That's a store

1:01

brand. GoTo, G-O-2, Kola. So

1:05

it's similar to Coca-Cola?

1:07

Similar. People call it a knockoff. I've been called

1:09

the best of the worst. If

1:12

you wanted to get my honest opinion, I believe

1:14

in a blind taste test. Your

1:16

average person wouldn't be able to tell the difference

1:18

between me and a can of regular Coca-Cola, but

1:21

yeah. Bottom shelf, we

1:24

can describe it comfortably as bottom shelf. I'm at

1:26

peace with that. Literally, on the... Most

1:28

of the time, yeah. Okay. Well,

1:31

there's a lot I want to talk to you

1:33

about today. Do you need any water or anything?

1:35

No, no, I'm completely self-contained. I

1:37

want to

1:39

ask you about your time before you

1:41

ended up in the fridge you're in

1:43

now. So you, I take

1:46

it, you were in a supermarket?

1:48

Yep. And where were you? I

1:50

was in a safe way. I

1:52

was bought at a case. So there

1:54

were 24 of us. We

1:56

were all purchased together and actually our

1:59

next... residence was a bowling

2:01

alley for a 12 year old birthday

2:04

party. I saw most

2:06

of the

2:08

rest of my case drunk at that party. I

2:10

was not drunk. I was saved

2:12

for later and brought home and put into a

2:14

refrigerator and then forgotten about for a few months,

2:16

placed in the back of the fridge. Sure.

2:20

I froze in the fridge. I was

2:23

in the very back and the temperature got

2:25

very cold. I didn't freeze all the way

2:27

through, but I had a

2:29

frozen cup of the week. You

2:31

were slushy inside? I was slushy inside. I had a

2:33

brief adventure

2:37

when they realized I was still in the fridge and they

2:39

took me out for a road trip. I

2:42

got to sit in the front seat cup

2:44

holder, you know? Yeah. I took a little

2:46

fun road trip down to

2:48

Florida and then back again and they never got around to

2:50

drinking me on that trip and they put me back in

2:52

the fridge and that's where I've been ever since. It

2:56

sounds like you were almost chosen so many

2:58

times. What does

3:00

it feel like when you're, say, at this birthday party

3:03

and you're waiting for your

3:05

moment? Have

3:10

you ever seen the movie Jaws? Yeah. So

3:12

you know the story that

3:14

Robert Shaw tells to Roy

3:17

Scheider and the other guy.

3:20

Anyway, you know the story about the USS Indianapolis

3:22

where he's in the water and the sharks are

3:24

coming and he's waiting to be picked

3:27

off and he's waiting and having that long dark

3:29

night and one by one is seeing his friends

3:31

go. That's kind of what it was like for

3:33

me. It was terrifying and

3:35

on the one hand I was very angry

3:37

at human beings for being in this position

3:39

to consume us and then

3:41

on the other hand I was also very angry. How

3:44

come you didn't want to consume me? Mm-hmm. Yeah. When

3:49

you think about being consumed by a human,

3:51

do you think about the human that you want to be

3:54

in? If

3:56

and when I'm finally consumed, I hope

3:58

I'm consumed by someone who enjoys it.

4:02

But I like to imagine

4:04

that if you're drunk immediately,

4:07

that instead of being a painful process, there's

4:09

the sort of first moment of relief the

4:11

can is cracked open. All

4:18

of this internal fizzing that I have

4:20

going on has somewhere to go. Just

4:24

sort of

4:26

drowned out from your external can and

4:29

you have that last moment where you're

4:31

fulfilling your purpose and beginning to blend

4:34

in with this human being and you become

4:36

part of their story. Truthfully,

4:44

here's how I expect to go, assuming that

4:46

I am consumed.

4:51

I'm expecting it's going to happen in the middle

4:54

of the night when I'm not waiting for it

4:56

and someone's going to open the fridge and pull

4:58

me out and that'll be that. It

5:02

would be nice to be poured into

5:04

a nice big pint glass, you know.

5:08

Frosty mug would be a pretty good way to go. It'd

5:10

be pleasant, you know. I

5:12

doubt that's going to happen though. They don't reserve

5:14

frosty mugs from no-do-call lists. That's just another one

5:17

of those facts of life. How

5:24

did you see Jaws? Oh, the human

5:27

being who lives in my house was watching Jaws.

5:29

They took me out of the fridge and kept

5:31

me on the table. I

5:33

thought, this is it. This is my big moment. Kind

5:35

of part of me, there was the Robert Jaws scene

5:37

where he's telling the story of the Indianapolis and I

5:40

was thinking, boy, this is just too perfect. This would

5:42

be amazing. He was reaching for me.

5:44

He was going to go for me and then at the

5:46

last minute, you know, another human being

5:48

came into the house and scolded him on not

5:50

drinking soft drinks. I put me back in the

5:52

fridge. Wow. Yeah, I would

5:54

have been perfect, huh? Yeah. You

5:58

know, I should ask you, there's a lot of talk right now. Now

6:00

about the health effects of

6:02

such sufferings. People tend to

6:04

think of of them as

6:06

very unhealthy. Sauntering a d

6:08

Do you feel unhealthy? Do.

6:11

I feel unhealthy. It's

6:17

hard to say because I think if you were

6:19

feeling the way I feel. He. Would

6:21

feel unhealthy. Race: But.

6:24

I feel like me. I.

6:26

Can't say that. That means I feel good. But

6:28

dumb. But to go back to your

6:31

question, you know unhealthy drinks are not

6:33

like a new thing by any means.

6:35

Have you ever heard of or eighty

6:37

Four? Rady? Sore Radius or fighter. So

6:39

back in the twenties there was an

6:42

energy drink with radium called radius or

6:44

and that it and any. The idea

6:46

was it was radioactive material in water.

6:48

They claimed radius or gave you energy

6:51

and cured a bunch of things. They

6:53

also implied on that raiders or increased

6:55

mail virility. Raiders are also kilda in

6:57

of people. So. You people

6:59

were just drinks radioactive material

7:02

dissolved in water in. I.

7:05

Am just looking it up here. Especially

7:08

if there's an E Bay. add. Ah,

7:11

there's a bottle of Rady so

7:13

we're for say I'll come on

7:15

now. Currently six hundred and fifty

7:17

nine dollars gotta be kidding me

7:19

says here. This. Certified Radioactive

7:21

Water was advertised as a quote

7:23

Cure for the Living Dead for

7:25

her and quote Perpetual Sunshine the

7:28

goes on. One guy who used

7:30

it at Eben Buyers died from

7:32

radiation poisoning and they had to

7:34

bury him in a lead lined

7:37

thousand. Yeah, that's what you get

7:39

when you drink guy radioactive material.

7:41

So they made a beverage which

7:43

not only killed a man but

7:45

his dead body would have it

7:48

had they not taken precautions. Killed.

7:50

all life around him yes presumably his

7:52

dead body is still radiating the poison

7:54

said he drank from ready for in

7:56

fact that the ad goes on a

7:59

half assistance they Exhumed him for study

8:01

in 1965. Oh, come and

8:03

his remains were still quite radioactive Yeah,

8:05

it then mentions that the developer of

8:07

radiothor was not an actual medical doctor

8:10

Yeah, that sounds about right to me

8:12

too. Also the bottle is in very

8:14

good condition So there's your

8:16

original power drink for you. I That

8:19

says to me more about human beings than

8:21

it does about soft drinks to be perfectly

8:23

honest our willingness

8:25

our eagerness to Find

8:28

something to your your chronic search

8:30

for potency. Yeah, that's

8:32

my evaluation of humanity chronic

8:35

search for potency Hello,

8:43

hey, I'm calling for Jeff Yep.

8:46

Hey Jeff you you're you're

8:48

the man behind the bygone

8:50

times vintage, right? Yeah,

8:53

I'm guilty I

8:55

I noticed one of your eBay listings.

8:58

So you put up the radiothor Radithor

9:03

Yeah. Yeah, is that is that

9:05

for real? Oh, yeah What

9:07

happened was I was at a flea market and I found

9:09

a set of about 20 25

9:12

of these things Okay,

9:15

it was like a shipping

9:17

crate or something and And

9:21

So, yeah, I have sold a few of those

9:24

now and is it is it a reproduction or

9:26

is it an original bottle? No,

9:28

these these are original Yeah

9:31

Original did you check them

9:33

with a Geiger counter? I

9:37

have not I don't Like

9:39

I just assumed they wouldn't have any

9:41

there's no content to them obviously But

9:45

I haven't no I didn't I didn't check up with the

9:47

Geiger counter. I don't I

9:49

suspected since they're from the 1920s. It would be Done

9:54

gone I

9:57

think maybe it wouldn't be gone. Yeah. Yeah I

10:00

don't know, maybe they would, I don't know. Can

10:08

I put them under a black light or something?

10:11

I hope it's not still active.

10:15

That raises interesting

10:18

questions, sir. Did

10:21

you know much about Radi-saur

10:23

when you... No,

10:26

no. I got on... Fortunately

10:29

now we have the internet and Google was

10:31

quite helpful. It's really an interesting story. I

10:33

don't know if you've taken the time to

10:36

look into it, but it's fascinating. Yeah,

10:38

well, I just heard about it. It's crazy that we

10:41

humans do that. I

10:43

know. I like the story

10:45

about the guy who died

10:47

from it, and then they dug him up in

10:50

the 60s in his lead line coffin. He was

10:52

still radioactive. That's

10:54

why I feel like you should maybe get checked out.

10:57

I think I will, yeah. I think I will now

10:59

that you said that, because I didn't really think

11:02

that the glass would hold any of that,

11:04

but I guess it's possible. You

11:06

know, radiation you don't want to mess around with, I guess, when

11:09

it comes down to... No. No,

11:11

I hear you. Hey,

11:13

I have to... I'm driving, and I don't want

11:15

to... I'm getting onto a busiest road now, so

11:17

I need to, unfortunately, hang up on you. Got

11:20

it, yeah. Be safe. Okay,

11:22

bye. Lewis,

11:24

one quick thing I want to ask you about. I have,

11:27

in my life, occasionally dropped

11:29

a can of soda. Oh, yeah.

11:32

Has that ever happened to you? Oh, it's

11:34

an awful experience. You feel,

11:36

I mean, obviously very shaken. There's

11:39

a rush, I guess, of, in human being

11:41

terms, it'd be like a rush of adrenaline.

11:44

And for a while, you're feeling just

11:46

very, very hyper

11:48

after the shake-up. And then

11:51

you start to sort of resettle back to

11:53

a neutral state, but you have this awful,

11:55

kind of nauseous, sicky, sleepy feeling after the

11:57

fact. And you feel kind of dumb.

12:00

You know the shakeup kind of like rattles you a little

12:02

bit and it takes a little bit of time for your

12:04

intelligence to kind Of come back to you. It's an awful

12:06

experience Hey, I imagine too

12:08

like we often after that happens. We

12:11

will tap on what would be your head Don't

12:14

it doesn't do anything. It doesn't There's

12:17

no reason to do it. It doesn't do anything

12:19

to the carbonation. All it does is annoy us

12:21

in a very sensitive moment So

12:31

Lewis I this might be awkward

12:33

to talk about but I feel like there's a

12:36

hierarchy to sodas at least in terms of how

12:38

Humans think about them sure at the top There's

12:40

you know coke and Pepsi and

12:42

then there's seven up and sprite and

12:44

then there's these you know Like your

12:46

sun kissed and grape soda and

12:49

Fanta that are kind of at the bottom

12:51

I wonder if that does that hierarchy does

12:53

it mean the same thing to you well?

12:56

Let me tell you something about Fanta, I

12:59

mean sure here in the US It's

13:01

not the most sophisticated soft drink, but

13:03

overseas. It's huge like Japan huge Fanta

13:06

Fanta in Thailand it's all over

13:08

the place if you walk down the street there

13:10

You'll see half open bottles of Fanta everywhere strawberry

13:13

Fanta in particular everywhere just hanging out

13:15

Just like sitting on this the street.

13:17

Yeah, just on the street because Humans

13:20

there use strawberry Fanta as an offering

13:23

to ghosts So they

13:26

leave it out on the street

13:28

because they're giving it to ghosts

13:30

Yes friendly ghosts according to local

13:32

custom love sweet red soda So

13:35

if you leave it out it attracts them and they hang

13:37

out around your house and protect you from you know

13:39

I guess whatever unfriendly ghosts might come around who

13:42

I guess don't love sweet red soda, right? Do

13:44

you do you know what it is about? Strawberry

13:47

Fanta in particular because of the color

13:49

so there's a theory that it's because

13:51

they can't do blood offerings anymore And

13:53

so strawberry Fanta, which is another you

13:55

know red Viscous liquid

13:57

would be the next best thing strawberry Fanta

13:59

Among the sodas available to us looks

14:02

the most like blood. Yeah, which I

14:04

personally don't see. Okay. But

14:06

it's a Thailand thing. We humans,

14:09

we think a lot about spirits

14:12

or at least what

14:14

might happen to us after we die. Do

14:17

you as a cola, do you think about that? The

14:20

afterlife? Yeah. Oh yeah. How

14:22

do you not? You think about it all the time. Yeah.

14:25

Because I'm reaching that age

14:27

myself where I'm probably not going to be around that

14:29

much longer. Mm-hmm. You

14:32

are, I mean, you are recyclable. Yeah. Which

14:34

opens up a whole other conversation.

14:37

You know, my body, my can

14:40

will almost certainly be repurposed.

14:43

And then that leads me to, you know, ask questions

14:45

of like, well, have I already been repurposed? I don't

14:48

know. You could have been any

14:50

number of sodas or? Or anything else. An airplane?

14:52

I could have been. I actually, when I was

14:54

younger, I used to have a recurring nightmare that

14:57

I was, there was a plane

15:00

crashing. There was an ocean and a beach.

15:02

And then it was nighttime and it was raining and there

15:04

was a plane crashing on the beach. And

15:07

I used to like to think that in

15:10

a previous existence, I was part of an airplane

15:12

and this was some sort of memory that had

15:14

traveled with me. Maybe I was part of like

15:17

a, I don't know, ventilation system on board of

15:19

a 747 or something. You

15:22

referred to your can as your body.

15:24

Yeah. Or your body as your can.

15:26

Yeah. An equivalency

15:28

between, you know, humans talk about

15:31

body and soul is, I'm sorry.

15:34

No, no, no, no. I'm only sighing

15:36

because I wish I had the answer to

15:39

this question. Is there an equivalence? Yes. Yes.

15:42

The body mind problem that human beings have

15:44

been dealing with since the days of Descartes

15:47

is something all too familiar

15:49

to us cans of soda. Am I just

15:52

a can? Am

15:54

I soda? What does

15:56

it mean to be soda? Am I part of the larger

15:59

ocean of soda? out there? Am I

16:01

just the individuated soda? Am I soda

16:03

interacting with a can? Am I can

16:06

being slowly eaten away by the soda inside

16:08

me? I've thought about this a lot. Yeah,

16:11

I don't have an answer, but it's something I wrestle

16:13

with all the time. What am I for the mentally?

16:16

Once the soda's gone, the can remains, but

16:18

by by me, I think. Yeah,

16:22

who knows? Who knows? These are the

16:24

mysteries that permeate every level of existence

16:27

as far as I know. I have

16:29

to say, I think about the type of

16:31

can you are with the pull tab. And

16:34

then I think about other cans in the kitchen, you know, like

16:36

a soup can. I don't know if you know any soup

16:39

cans. I know a couple of soup cans. And

16:41

it occurs to me, you are so

16:45

lucky because you

16:47

think about the way a soup can gets opened.

16:49

Oh yeah. That the, a can

16:51

opener to me seems

16:53

like a torture device. It is.

16:55

And let me tell you something else too. The, I

16:58

thank God every day of my life that I was

17:00

not born a can administered any soup. I

17:04

at least have lived a life.

17:06

I know where I've been, you know, I'm not

17:08

all of my dreams may have necessarily come true.

17:10

I may have taken a couple of bad turns

17:12

here and there, but at least at the end

17:14

of the day, I've been witness to my own

17:16

life. These poor bastards are

17:18

stuck in these soup cans. We talk about

17:21

hermetically sealed. They lose all sense

17:23

of time and perspective. When you open a can

17:25

of soup, when they wake

17:27

up, they have no idea how much

17:29

time has passed. They're like astronauts coming

17:31

out of cryogenic freeze and they're all

17:34

spaced out and they're completely disoriented. They

17:36

don't know what's going on. And their

17:38

wake up call is being torn open

17:41

by these damn can openers. What a nightmare

17:43

of an existence. Their flesh is literally busted

17:45

open only to wake up into a world

17:47

that they don't know anything about. All

17:50

the rest of us stay away from the cans of soup.

17:53

And I'll be honest with you, I feel awful about it,

17:55

but whenever I try to talk to a can of soup,

17:58

they are weird. I'm.

18:01

You've mentioned that you're you're feeling like

18:04

you're nearing the end of your life

18:06

area. What? did you feel old? Or

18:08

oh yeah, yeah, overnighter? I know, for

18:10

fact, I'm old. I can look at

18:12

my face and it. Okay

18:15

and they can I ask how close

18:17

you are t minus two weeks to

18:19

go my friend. While.

18:23

So what? but you could keep going on

18:25

after that. but I just I thought it's

18:27

not recommended. but I could. Desert.

18:30

See, I mean I think about

18:32

this with you because I'm. It

18:35

and I'm sorry if I have. This

18:37

isn't the right way to put it,

18:39

but it seems like your purpose is

18:41

to be consumed by a human am

18:43

And so you know we all want

18:46

to serve a purpose. We'll want to

18:48

be useful now and yet for you.

18:50

The moment of your use is the

18:52

moment where you are no more. and

18:54

I wonder if that's something you anticipate

18:57

with optimism. Earth, It feels like you

18:59

know approaching the in that's a paradox

19:01

Isn't her? It is. Yeah, I

19:06

was on the one hand. And

19:08

you sorted into read the idea

19:10

of being consumed Santa You know

19:13

all beings endeavor to persist in

19:15

their own being. Spinoza

19:17

said that. We

19:20

heard about that from a yak. But.

19:23

On the other hand, I

19:25

guess on some level I still hope that

19:28

our. That I

19:30

will kind of the show myself by

19:32

being consumed. You know, I think that

19:34

you're a mystical still very much alive?

19:36

Know if I'm being perfectly honest with

19:38

you on. You know I do. I

19:41

do sometimes fear that than honest. I

19:45

feel weird saying this, but am.

19:49

I could drink you. Know.

19:53

In in. Yeah. I

19:56

mean, I want I, I, I, I want

19:58

you And I am. The But I also I

20:00

want this to be a good moment for you. I

20:03

will. I want you to be rare. I don't want you

20:05

to do it if you're not already. Well.

20:11

I'll make a deal with you. I've

20:14

always said I wanted to go with my

20:16

eyes wide open. I'm prepared to and it

20:18

here if you promise me that even if

20:20

you're disgusted by hi I taste you. Will

20:22

finish the cam. I

20:24

I will make you that promise. Is

20:28

there anything you want to

20:30

say to the humans you've

20:33

encountered? The Can the As

20:35

encountered the countertops. you've known

20:37

I sank. Having

20:40

overall I would say life as a

20:42

gift in a blessing and I don't

20:44

believe anything ends, but everything simply transforms

20:46

into the next thing. I

20:50

would say if I can be a little

20:52

bit soft hearted and sentimental for a moment

20:54

or two. Ah,

20:57

it's a gift to get to be anything

20:59

at all. Well.

21:04

Maybe what what will do and

21:06

that just in the interest of

21:08

of journalism is all I have.

21:10

drink about half an animal. Check

21:12

in. again. great. You want to

21:14

talk while I'm drinking you? I

21:16

don't know. Okay no I won't

21:18

have the full experience. Okay bro.

21:20

check in with you have the

21:22

halfway mark. Or

21:25

it so am. I

21:27

man. I'm picking you up. Okay,

21:57

This I have to say. Feals. Delightful.

22:00

All right,

22:03

well, I guess cheers cheers to

22:05

you with you here's

22:07

hoping for the best I

22:15

mean You're

22:18

you are delicious. Thank you. You're

22:21

very gentle This

22:23

is a trippy feeling.

22:25

I'm not gonna lie. All right my

22:28

first report Feeling

22:30

very spacious inside right now. I'm feeling god.

22:33

I got room to be yeah But

22:37

I'm also I'm feeling the

22:40

warmth of the tummy Very

22:42

strange thing. I'm in two places at once spacious in

22:44

my own body, but feeling warm and secure in your

22:47

own tummy All

22:52

the sudden I find myself Thinking

22:54

about my body I'm thinking about my body

22:56

and I'm hoping that my body is a

22:58

good place for you I think so.

23:00

I don't mind telling you my

23:03

first impression of the inside of your own tummy

23:05

You seem to be taking pretty good care of

23:07

yourself. Thank you. Yeah, I I

23:20

Am seeing some are you sweating think some

23:23

with joy All

23:25

right, I'm gonna I'm gonna have a little more you

23:27

go ahead and finish me off Okay

23:40

Are you are you still there?

24:01

This is Everything is Alive. The

24:04

show is produced by Jennifer Mills and

24:07

me, Ian Chilog. We got help this

24:09

week from Emily Spivak, Sarah Geiss, Mackenzie

24:11

Fagan, Eva Warchover, and Bill

24:13

Curtis. A very special

24:15

thanks to Stevie Lane and Jorge Just,

24:17

also Teddy Blanks and Adam Squires at

24:20

Chipps. We're grateful to the reporting of

24:23

Patrick Wynn and Timothy Jorgensen. On

24:25

this episode, we heard the song Sheets 2

24:27

from the band Mountains. That's off their album

24:29

Choral. Everything

24:31

is Alive is a proud member of

24:34

Radiotopia from PRX, and we are eternally

24:36

grateful to Julie Shapiro, executive producer. Lewis,

24:39

the can of generic cola, was

24:41

played by Lewis Kornfeld. Our

24:46

website is everythingisalive.com. You

24:49

can find us on Twitter at ianchilog

24:51

and on Instagram at EIA

24:54

Podcast. If there's a thing

24:56

you want us to talk to, let us know. We'll

25:03

see you soon.