0:00

Doctor. Dodi Today we're

0:02

diving deep into the art and

0:04

science of manifestation, including how an

0:07

understanding of the neuroscience around manifestation

0:09

can radically change our lives for

0:12

the better side. Lot of start

0:14

their can you tell our audiences

0:16

listening and watching today. What?

0:19

You think will be possible for

0:21

them and their lives after listening

0:23

to. This. Interview I think

0:26

there are several aspects of one

0:28

is. Unfortunately, so

0:30

many people give their agency away

0:32

and what I mean is that

0:34

they look outside of themselves or

0:36

something that will guide them. Or

0:38

ah, that there's some cosmic presidents

0:40

are out there that scoring to

0:42

intervene. And in fact, the first

0:45

sense of the book as you

0:47

know with the universe doesn't give

0:49

a guy boucher and the reason

0:51

is because the universe has enough

0:53

to give and. The point is

0:55

that so many of us and

0:58

I. Included. Early

1:00

in my life I looked for

1:02

external affirmation People who would say

1:04

well, what you're doing good or

1:06

what the air that's right or

1:08

gees, you didn't Credible Thanks. I

1:10

like you off with the goal

1:12

of sort of. Making

1:14

me feel okay about myself and

1:16

in some ways is very much

1:19

relate to that because the answer

1:21

is only you have the power

1:23

to make yourself happy. As Epic

1:26

Tetris has said of many other

1:28

stoics, ah, You

1:30

may not be able to control your circumstance.

1:33

But. You can control how you react,

1:35

your circumstance, and in many ways that's

1:37

the truth about happiness and also of

1:39

course how you look at the world

1:41

So. I'm. Sure, you been in

1:43

the situation where you've shared with a loved

1:46

one, a family member cheese. You know I

1:48

I want this to happen. Got? I'm so

1:50

excited about this. I think this a great

1:52

idea and then they'll say something like. Know.

1:55

That stupid I at what why would

1:57

you to that are you can't do

1:59

that and you know. Obviously that's very

2:02

hurtful and for many people deflating. But

2:04

if you have your own internal compass

2:06

that guy to and you have a

2:08

vision of what you want to do

2:11

and you do some fairly straightforward practices.

2:13

but it's not as if it's a

2:15

one and done, it's a process. I

2:18

think the other think people get confused

2:20

about one manifestation is that. Ah,

2:23

there's a timeline here or it works

2:25

out exactly the way you want. and

2:27

there's not and you have to be

2:30

patient. One. Of the things I

2:32

think the cause of suffering for lot of

2:34

people is. Ah,

2:37

attachments and this is attachment to

2:39

outcome when everything is focused on

2:41

an outcome if it doesn't manifest

2:43

or kerr the way you wish

2:45

you very disappointed and you're upset.

2:48

The reality is most of the

2:50

positive things about Goals is actually

2:52

the journey. It's not nursery destination.

2:55

The same is true of manifesting.

2:57

Ah. The other reality is that

3:00

sometimes things don't manifest the way

3:02

you want and there are reasons

3:04

for that and some of them

3:07

are can be very complex or

3:09

not straightforward. Ah, so the idea

3:11

is how do I use the

3:14

tools I have. To.

3:16

Maximum Wage increase the

3:18

likelihood of my intention

3:20

manifesting. There. Are no guarantees,

3:23

but how do you use your brain

3:25

if you will to bring about your

3:27

intentions? And I think that's what this

3:29

is really about. But there is nothing

3:32

in this world that's one hundred percent.

3:36

Well. There's a lot there and we're going to

3:38

unpack it off. And I'm gonna start off

3:40

with. One of the early quotes

3:42

inside of the book you mention the first

3:44

one but there's another quoted some said a

3:46

book and it's a keep them an idea

3:49

for a lot of people who don't understand

3:51

how manifestation works and you are not. Just.

3:54

A writer, although being a writer is

3:56

a beautiful thing. You explain this from

3:58

a neuroscientist prospect. so I want to

4:01

show the cold here. The. You shared

4:03

the book. He. Said you may

4:05

not realize it or believe it. But

4:07

you're already manifesting your life. The question

4:09

is, is it the life you want

4:11

Citing the first thing that I'd love

4:14

start off with is that many people

4:16

realize it, but they're actually actively manifesting

4:18

their current life. Can you explain that?

4:20

Sure, it's like if you will any

4:22

exercise when you first start doing it.

4:25

Ah, you're not very good at it.

4:27

And. They but the thing as you

4:29

have to actually practicing. With.

4:31

Intention as you well meaning

4:34

that you have to every

4:36

day. Ah, put forth effort

4:38

and all of us have

4:40

goals and aspirations. But if

4:42

we have no understanding or

4:44

road map how to make

4:46

those reality than were lost.

4:48

So sometimes it works, sometimes

4:50

it won't work. but there's

4:52

no Ah. If you

4:55

will organize, plan and your head

4:57

and I think that's one of

4:59

the first things you have to

5:01

do is to one actually examined

5:03

your life and see what worked,

5:06

what hasn't worked and also have

5:08

a vision of the life you

5:10

want and that takes effort to

5:12

do that. or the other thing

5:14

which a lot of people don't

5:16

appreciate unfortunately is that who we

5:19

are today, how we act, how

5:21

we interact actually. For. Many

5:23

people is a manifestation of the

5:25

baggage they carry from childhood. So

5:28

if you grew up in a

5:30

child's are in an environment where

5:33

as an example, you are not

5:35

love, you did not develop appropriate

5:37

attachments skills. If people were hypercritical

5:39

of you, that has an impact

5:41

on every relationship. You have almost

5:44

every interaction you have and that

5:46

can be self sabotaging. So you

5:48

also have to understand as part

5:50

of this process what are the

5:52

drivers of your behavior? What. Are.

5:55

You not seen or don't understand

5:57

because you know many people. As

5:59

an example in relationships they always

6:01

pick the same type of person

6:03

and often times they're these code

6:06

a pennant. Relationships nips go backwards.

6:08

Often times it relates to how

6:10

they grew up. I.

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body and brain will thank

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you. Let's. Start

8:12

at the basics. From.

8:14

A Neuroscientist Prospectus. What

8:17

Is manifestation? And. even

8:20

though you touched on a little bit. Give

8:22

us some of the top

8:24

misconceptions people have. About.

8:27

What? It isn't a wooded area

8:29

or whatever dry ice I think

8:31

I understand. So.

8:35

My definition a manifestation

8:37

is that you. With

8:40

intentions are utilized tools

8:42

to ah access parts

8:44

of your subconscious if

8:46

you will that will

8:48

embed your intention and

8:50

as resolve have an

8:52

impact on what we

8:54

call your ah a

8:56

test positive networks and

8:58

then utilize that information

9:00

to maximal maximize the

9:02

potential of whatever that

9:04

intention is and what

9:06

I mean by that

9:08

is there certain cognitive.

9:10

Networks in your brain and

9:12

they worked together to a

9:14

simply makes us who we

9:16

are, but they're certainly very

9:18

specific aspects that are important

9:20

to work together to maximize

9:22

your ability to manifest. So

9:24

you have something called the

9:26

Executive Control network. You have

9:28

what's called the salient network,

9:30

you have the attention that

9:32

works and then you have

9:34

the default mode network and

9:36

all those have to work

9:38

together. To allow you

9:40

to with the greatest likelihood to

9:42

manifest your intention. When.

9:45

You look around as a what do you see

9:47

or the top. And. Biggest mistakes that

9:50

people are practicing or not

9:52

practicing when it comes to

9:54

approaching this topic of manifestation.

9:56

Well. I think that and I'll use

9:58

some it an analogy. That I hope

10:00

make sense. Neurosciences

10:04

learned about a great deal

10:06

about as an example, compassion.

10:08

And if you look at

10:10

essentially every religion which suspense

10:13

thousands of years there certain

10:15

fundamental principles that religion choose.

10:18

Ah, to impart. Wisdom

10:21

as example. compassion and fact.

10:23

That's the basis of simply

10:25

every religion, but. They're

10:28

wrapped in a dog must. Okay,

10:30

and the dogma is associated with

10:32

the particular culture. Okay,

10:35

But that's underline tenants.

10:38

Are actually Neurosciences proven those

10:40

to be the case? As

10:42

an example with Compassion and

10:45

Ah. so we know that

10:47

fundamentally as a species we

10:49

evolved to nurture to care

10:51

Because we have offspring the

10:53

don't swim away a run

10:56

off into the forests, they

10:58

have to be cared for.

11:00

So genetically we have been

11:02

endowed with Ah aspects of

11:04

our Ah dna which. Guide

11:08

us as an example when

11:10

you care for another. Ah,

11:12

you release oxytocin with stimulate

11:14

your pleasure and reward centers.

11:16

Okay also, your physiology works

11:18

at it's best. Your heart

11:20

rate decreases your pulse, decreases

11:22

your immune system's boosted cortisol

11:24

levels of stress, hormone levels

11:26

or decreased will. These are

11:28

because we evolve to care

11:30

because we didn't care of

11:32

our offspring, would not survive

11:34

and in many ways religion

11:36

has understood this to experiential.

11:38

Effects And and wrap this round

11:40

the dogma and in many ways

11:42

this is true of Manifesting if

11:44

you look back at the history

11:46

of manifested in the first and

11:48

Second century A D. There's

11:51

something called the her medicine and

11:53

it was decided that all is

11:55

in the mind which fundamentally is

11:57

true and then this them there

12:00

was picked up by of will

12:02

call the new thought were if

12:04

the guy an insidious quimby if

12:06

I recall correctly and he promoted

12:08

this idea. That your

12:10

mind to do anything and again that

12:13

is true. But then it went to

12:15

the next level which went to what

12:17

is it. Thinking

12:19

grow rich and also fundamentally the

12:22

secret. Now where did these go

12:24

off track? Well, let's just year

12:26

with the recent one. The Secret.

12:30

The. Problem with the secret is

12:32

that it creates a narrative

12:35

of self interest, of selfishness

12:37

I want. And the problem

12:39

with I want for so

12:41

many people is. On

12:44

some level, reason people I want

12:46

is because they're insecure about themselves.

12:48

From what I mean by that

12:50

is most people want to make

12:52

an impression to others that they're

12:54

okay. Like. As an example

12:57

for myself when I was younger,

12:59

ah, I cared. A lot of

13:01

shame and insecurity So I thought,

13:03

well, I'll become a doctor or

13:05

become a neurosurgeon. How become a

13:07

neuroscientist? I'll become an entrepreneur And

13:09

in each one of those levels,

13:11

I believe that wealth. Now I'm

13:13

going to be okay and always

13:15

people are gonna look at me

13:17

and I'm gonna feel good about

13:19

myself And it doesn't happen for

13:21

most people because and western capitalist

13:23

society. Ah, there is this narrative

13:25

that success. Means money, wealth,

13:28

position that and translates into happiness.

13:30

And of course you know as

13:32

well as I do their zillions

13:35

of people who are unhappy who

13:37

have all these things and so

13:40

pushing the narrative that I want

13:42

are actually decreases Your belated manifests

13:44

now in my same well that's

13:47

impossible won't happen. Know the fundamental

13:49

techniques though that have developed actually

13:52

art techniques in many ways that

13:54

to support this idea. Of

13:56

manifesting your intention but you

13:58

can actually if. The will

14:00

maximize those the affects much greater

14:02

by using different techniques and one

14:05

of those is to look at

14:07

the world to a different lens

14:09

and that lens is to the

14:11

lens of compassion and been a

14:13

service to others Because as I

14:16

was saying a modern society pushes

14:18

the narratives of success at Franklin

14:20

leads to emptiness. We're

14:23

designed to care for people. As

14:25

I mentioned earlier, when you. Manifest

14:28

your intention and actually don't have

14:30

it self directed, but habit directed

14:32

to be in service of others.

14:35

It allows for all the other

14:37

stuff to happen. But.

14:39

It's more powerful when it's

14:41

focused on the other and.

14:44

The. Other thing that happened is

14:46

most people have an idea

14:48

of what they want. They.

14:50

Don't understand what they need and

14:52

those are far different. Ah thanks.

14:55

Unfortunately, and by redirecting how you

14:57

look at the world than that

14:59

strengthens that Billie the Manifest of

15:01

give you an example really quick.

15:03

There was a young lady who

15:05

read my first book which is

15:07

you know talked about my own

15:09

challenges growing up but also the

15:11

path I took to become in

15:14

the dock and getting medical school

15:16

when probably by all rights. Are

15:19

that should not have happened. At least

15:21

by traditional metrics. Anna

15:24

a young lady reached out to me and she's

15:26

from free locker and immigrant and she said. You

15:30

know I've I've applied to Moscow

15:32

three times. I was rejected. Ah

15:35

yeah, I read your But I

15:37

wanted to just ask you why

15:39

did that happen? Can you help

15:41

me And her situation was she

15:43

wanted to be a doctor, not

15:45

to be of service, but because

15:47

she wanted to make her parents

15:49

happy and those are completely two

15:52

different ways to looked at the

15:54

world. If you look at it, I

15:56

need this. To. Do whatever it is,

15:58

which is a selfish call to make. They're unhappy

16:00

and there's nothing wrong with that

16:03

touch. Be rock vs though. Looking

16:05

at through the lens of saints

16:07

I want to be a doctor

16:09

because I can help people and

16:12

be of service and indirect benefit

16:14

of that will make my parents

16:16

happy. but my goal is to

16:19

be of service and as results

16:21

with a little coach. He or

16:23

she recently graduated from medical school

16:26

and I've had that conversation multiple

16:28

times with people and. A It

16:30

is a distinction ah between

16:32

those two worlds is. To.

16:35

Set the stage for the rest of interview because you

16:37

touch on it a little bit. Am.

16:40

I want to talk about. Your. Life growing up,

16:44

And. The mentor who you

16:46

ended up. Meeting. Who not

16:48

only change your life but. Taught. You

16:50

many these principles of manifestation. so your

16:52

life, growing up, your early life was

16:55

a tough life. You. Grew up

16:57

in poverty with an alcoholic father and you

16:59

shared on our first episode together on his

17:01

podcast. Also about your mother and her challenges

17:04

are suffering from chronic depression. There was a

17:06

of hardship, there was lot of instability that

17:08

was there and then one day he walked

17:10

into a magic shop. For. Real thrill

17:13

like visitors story. And met

17:15

a woman named Bruce who changed your

17:17

life and change your brain. Tell.

17:20

Us about Ruth and what you learn

17:22

from her so that we can continue.

17:24

And.on that foundation. Yes, and in fact,

17:27

that is the foundation. Ah, imagine being

17:29

a twelve year old in the situation

17:31

you described. And

17:33

there's something of course as you know

17:36

and many of your listeners called adverse

17:38

childhood experiences. And you know, if you

17:40

have poverty, if you have alcohol or

17:42

drug abuse, if you have mental illness,

17:44

all of these different aspects would you

17:46

add the numbers up as you will

17:49

the likelihood for you succeeding. In

17:51

society diminishes in proportion to how

17:53

many of those you have. Ah,

17:55

and that's the power of these

17:58

adverse childhood. It's spears. The to

18:00

negatively affect your life. So for

18:02

me at the age of twelve

18:05

I had a complete sense of

18:07

hopelessness. Ah despair. ah a self

18:09

taught to said I had no

18:11

future and I walked into this

18:14

magic shop. in there was this

18:16

woman, Ruth. An interesting thing about

18:18

Ruth and this is actually I

18:20

think something that's very profound is

18:23

this is a person. Who

18:25

had a radiant presence

18:28

and. This. Is

18:30

a person. Who was non

18:32

judgmental, accepted you had a smile

18:34

on her face, did not treat

18:36

you as if as example I

18:38

was a trial that she was

18:40

an adult and what I had

18:42

to say was meaningless. She treated

18:44

me as an equal. All of

18:46

these things create a situation of

18:48

psychological safety which means when you

18:51

feel safe, your open you listen

18:53

to other center fact. If you

18:55

look at our political discourse by

18:57

creating a narrative, a seer people

18:59

shut down and they don't listen.

19:01

Ah. In this case though, she

19:03

made me comfortable and I told

19:05

her the truth when she asked

19:07

me some challenging questions but at

19:09

the end of it to as

19:11

she said listen, I'm here for

19:13

another six weeks. If you show

19:15

up every day, I'll teach you

19:17

something that could change your life

19:19

Now There were four aspects of

19:21

that one was ah. I did

19:23

not realize that my background because

19:26

of it's chaotic nature and unpredictability

19:28

made me very tense because I

19:30

never know what's gonna. Happen I

19:32

didn't have, my father was going

19:34

to come in trucks. I didn't

19:36

know if my mother was going

19:38

to attempt suicide. So that you

19:40

know this creates this constant fear

19:42

and anxiety and as result your

19:44

muscles are out was tense so

19:46

the first thing she taught me

19:48

was how to relax my body

19:50

and again what you'll see here

19:52

these initially or the fundamental the

19:54

precepts of a mindfulness practice but

19:56

this was before mindfulness was ever

19:58

talked about. This was. I'm.

20:01

Are before neuroplasticity was talked about.

20:03

Ah so she taught me this

20:05

relaxation technique and again I was

20:07

twelve and to be frank with

20:09

you I thought it was also

20:11

to be as I was just

20:13

showing up because and nothing else

20:16

to do and she was given

20:18

be cookies but.of but once I

20:20

mastered that then she taught me.

20:24

A centrally how to look at

20:26

the world at a different way

20:28

and to focus and this was

20:30

using in this case a candle

20:32

and it allowed me to attend

20:34

and to be present in the

20:36

thing is to learn you have

20:38

to attend, you have to be

20:40

presence And so once she taught

20:42

me that then she taught me

20:44

a practice which I called open

20:46

in the Heart which was one

20:48

ah many of us have a

20:50

negative dialogue going on in our

20:52

head. And the she made

20:54

me realize that that is not

20:57

truth. Ah, and that

20:59

it was within my power to

21:01

change that narrative to wanna self

21:03

affirmation. And that was very powerful

21:05

because when you're hyper critical of

21:08

yourself and many of us are

21:10

more hyper critical of ourselves than

21:12

we are anyone else. Ah, That.

21:15

Influences how you see the world. So

21:17

once I was kind of myself, it

21:19

also made me understand that everyone is

21:22

suffering. And made

21:24

me look at the world

21:26

through much gentler kinder lens.

21:28

Ah, recognizing that facts. But

21:30

the most important thing relative

21:32

to our conversation today is

21:34

she taught me a visualization

21:36

technique which ah at that

21:38

time was really only used

21:40

primarily whoop would primarily with

21:42

athletes. And it was this

21:44

technique of visualizing what you

21:47

wanted to be, but the

21:49

other components of that in

21:51

which he had me frankly.

21:53

Do was to

21:55

ah right my

21:57

intention down to.

22:00

Read it aloud. Ah

22:02

to read it to

22:05

myself silently. Ah. And

22:08

then visualize myself in that position

22:10

or with it with what I

22:12

wanted. Now here is where the

22:14

mistake by me was made and

22:16

which I think is the mistake

22:18

with the secret. What did I

22:20

as a twelve year old Right

22:22

out. I. Wrote down I wanted

22:24

a Rolex but that's I wanted a

22:26

match and I wanted to be worth

22:29

a million dollars. Ah, Excedrin and at

22:31

the challenge with of course that ah

22:33

clearly those are my own self interest

22:35

but I didn't know any better or

22:38

have any self awareness or insights and

22:40

I thought oh if I get those

22:42

I will be whole. I'll be happy.

22:44

My life will be for And I

22:46

did go down that path. I accomplished

22:49

every one of those things and I

22:51

did use these techniques. The

22:53

problem was that they were all focused

22:55

on me and at. The. End

22:57

of completing all of them, I was

23:00

empty and more unhappy than I had

23:02

ever been. Because. I

23:04

was self focused completely and even though

23:07

I became a doctor which courses a

23:09

good thing and Duncan drives Ozick a

23:11

doctor but I became a doctor. Because.

23:14

It would increase my status and

23:16

also it would guarantee be a

23:19

paycheck. But it was about me

23:21

again when I changed the focus

23:23

to say it is about service.

23:26

It's about caring for others. It

23:28

made incredible things happen. Ah as

23:30

soon know from the first book

23:33

I ended up becoming a very

23:35

successful entrepreneur. Ah, I ended up

23:37

ah, becoming friends with the Dali

23:40

Lama Sounded Center at Stanford. Ah,

23:42

I became the Chairman. Of the

23:44

Dalai Lama Foundation, and Ah and

23:46

ended up knowing a lot of

23:48

the major spiritual religious leaders around

23:50

the world. And it's interesting because

23:53

the trajectory went from rags to

23:55

riches. and as you know though,

23:57

I end up losing almost a

23:59

million dollars. Six weeks was back

24:01

to rag heads. ah and him. Up

24:03

In the face of that I end

24:05

up giving away thirty million dollars which

24:07

is a mother store it to charity

24:09

or two. but. The reason

24:12

I did that was I realized I

24:14

was wrong. We focused and I gave

24:16

that money away to live up. To.

24:21

So. The principles that Roots had

24:23

taught me and I had missed

24:25

and any way that made me

24:27

rich again. but it made me

24:29

written a different way. It made

24:31

me rich in the sense that

24:33

I ended up meeting most extraordinary

24:35

people in the world. I ended

24:37

up doing actions that change many

24:39

people's lives. It allowed me to

24:42

write the first book in love

24:44

me to write this book. And

24:46

so by changing that ah perception

24:48

from not just me but outwardly

24:50

to be. Of service really

24:52

changed everything. You. Know

24:54

you describe this time in your allies

24:57

and say I was never more miserable

24:59

in my life than one. I had

25:01

everything. When. You're at the peak of

25:04

what. Many people would look

25:06

at as external success. Public

25:08

company Millions of dollars. You.

25:11

Know that are present. Homes.

25:13

Vehicles, etc. The.

25:16

Question that I have for you. Is

25:18

you described? This. As

25:20

being wrongly focused. And.

25:24

I. Want to bring up and paraphrase

25:26

a well known Jim Carrey quote? Ah,

25:29

You know he says that again. I'm paraphrasing here.

25:32

will put the right quo inside the show notes

25:34

is as my hope and dream would be for

25:36

everybody to be rich and famous so that they

25:38

know and understand that. Having. Our.

25:41

Bridges and being famous doesn't really

25:44

amount to much and doesn't make

25:46

you happy. Was this. Unnecessary

25:49

stage in your evolution

25:51

and journey. In.

25:54

Your souls consciousness did you

25:56

have to go through. A.

25:58

Little bit of this much. Realistic external

26:01

stage free to become.

26:03

The. Person you are today. Well I. Think

26:06

that's actually correct. Ah, I would like to

26:08

believe everyone does to have to go to

26:10

that, but the nature of who we are

26:12

often times is that we don't. I was

26:14

pleased with what we. Are

26:18

but that that's definitely a truism.

26:20

But if you go further in

26:22

ah to Jim Carrey story and

26:24

I actually you said as an

26:26

example in my book ah he

26:28

made com and also that I

26:30

realized it wasn't about me. And

26:34

ah, And. He attributes

26:37

that to change his life. how he

26:39

looked, swirled, ah and so once he

26:41

did that, he did get everything he

26:43

wanted which was if well, to be

26:45

famous and to impact people's lives in

26:47

a positive way. It's Ah A Again,

26:49

as he said it wasn't about ah

26:51

he realized that the money and all

26:54

that went with that. Now I have

26:56

had people say well it's easy for

26:58

you to say I want to have

27:00

a buddy a try. It's it's it's

27:02

it's it's effects. That said, see how

27:04

bad I feel and I. Could certainly

27:07

appreciate that. And and oh, can

27:09

be wrong. Listen, I think working

27:11

hard and having that type of

27:13

success is fine as long as

27:15

it's not. The

27:17

only thing you do and when I mean by

27:20

that is. We're looking

27:22

at the difference between hedonic

27:24

and who. Demonic Happiness. Hedonic.

27:26

Happiness herself. Pleasure. It's maximizing

27:28

your own pleasure. What we

27:30

know from a variety of

27:33

studies is that that's transitory.

27:35

It's not long lasting. Who

27:39

demonic happiness is more related to

27:41

ah, purpose and meaning. And it's

27:43

a different type of happiness, but

27:46

it's a much longer lasting

27:48

and deeper type of happiness. And

27:50

so yes, Who demonic? I

27:52

mean, hedonic happiness is fine you,

27:55

but you just have to look

27:57

at it for what it is.

28:00

And I would also say you

28:02

also have to understand. That

28:05

and less. you view it for what it

28:07

is. That will

28:09

create suffering And what I mean

28:11

by that is listen, I live

28:13

in a very nice house. I

28:16

have a Porsche ah I've had

28:18

numerous cars. ah But if all

28:20

goes way tomorrow I am okay.

28:23

And. That. Is the difference For

28:25

most people they use that as he did

28:27

their density or their tool which they use

28:30

as a crutch to get along in the

28:32

world. And. That is the

28:34

big difference not having attachment.

28:36

To. These things? because attachment

28:39

and craving are one of

28:41

the greatest causes of. This.

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mitochondria today. I

30:25

know from your story and following your work over the

30:28

years, one of the people that you've had the pleasure

30:32

of connecting with is Eckhart Tolle. One

30:35

of the biggest teachings and takeaways that I've

30:37

gotten from him is I

30:39

feel he does a really good job of

30:42

describing the difference and the distinction between attachment,

30:47

which sometimes people say, well, of course I'm going to

30:49

be attached to my mom, my dad, my loved ones.

30:52

He says, what we're really talking about

30:54

is identification. Right. And

30:56

if the identification, which you just

30:58

use the word identity, it's

31:01

thinking you are that thing. It's having

31:04

a BMW and thinking because you have that,

31:06

this adds to the stature of who you

31:08

are. When you were at your

31:10

height and everybody around

31:12

you was saying, look at this

31:14

rags to riches story. How

31:17

are you wrapped up in the identification of

31:19

the things that you had created? What

31:22

was your identity like at that time? Well,

31:25

as I said, I did believe

31:28

that I mean,

31:30

imagine at one time I had a, I

31:32

think your six or eight million dollar house overlooking the

31:34

ocean. I had a villa in

31:36

Florence. I had a penthouse on the top of

31:39

a building in San Francisco. I had

31:41

a Porsche, a Ferrari, a BMW, a Range

31:43

Rover, and there's another

31:45

one in there somewhere, Ferrari. Anyway,

31:47

I had all of these things and

31:50

I was single at the time and I was

31:52

dating sort of the

31:55

starlet type. Not that there's anything wrong with

31:57

being a starlet type, but My

32:00

intention was to go

32:02

out with attractive women and be seen. And

32:08

it was on one level, it

32:10

was, wow, this is great. But it was great

32:12

because all my friends said, wow, you have everything.

32:15

It wasn't great though because I felt I

32:17

had everything, because I was still empty inside.

32:19

I wasn't fulfilled. I was

32:22

still insecure. I still needed these things

32:24

as crutches to give me my identity.

32:27

You know as well as I see somebody in the Ferrari and go,

32:29

wow, man, they must have a great life. That's cool.

32:32

And that's what I was

32:34

doing. And it wasn't so much necessarily just

32:36

enjoying the Ferrari. It was like driving around

32:39

and being seen in the Ferrari. And

32:42

on some level, again, it's OK, but you have to

32:44

see it for what it is. You

32:47

write about this in your book and also in the new book

32:50

as well. But ultimately, you went through a pretty

32:53

stressful bankruptcy. But in

32:55

going through this, what

32:58

again, many people could see as a rock

33:00

bottom moment in your life, you

33:03

completely set the foundation for something

33:05

new. Walk us through that.

33:07

During this most painful period of your life, how

33:10

did it deepen your understanding of

33:12

not only who you were, but

33:14

the true meaning of manifestation? Well,

33:17

again, as you said, for all

33:19

intents and purposes, I had done everything

33:21

the secret told me to do, and

33:24

I was horribly miserable. And

33:27

after losing almost $80 million, I

33:30

went back and reflected in my

33:32

home, which was

33:34

overlooking the Bay on Newport Beach. And

33:38

I did go through a period of great reflection.

33:41

And I realized the mistake

33:43

I had made. I had focused on

33:46

selfish goals. And

33:50

they had not made me happy. And

33:52

so I reached an inflection

33:54

point where I

33:58

had to make some decisions. And it

34:00

was interesting because in my particular case,

34:02

after losing all that money and being

34:04

effectively bankrupt and $3 million in the

34:07

hole, two people became

34:09

my friends. One was a banker and

34:11

one was a lawyer. I had borrowed

34:13

$15 million from the bank based

34:16

on stock that I had at that

34:18

time, which you could, and the

34:20

stock was now worth nothing. And so

34:22

the banker came to me and wanted his money and

34:24

asked me how I was going to give him his

34:27

money. And my lawyer,

34:29

of course, I consulted with and

34:33

I had to sell essentially everything. Now

34:36

the interesting thing was I had made some

34:38

donations to charity based on stock that I

34:40

had and

34:43

that was my only asset.

34:45

And my attorney, when I was talking to him, he

34:48

said, you know, Jim, our junior

34:50

partner, he actually did not file the paperwork. You

34:52

don't have to give any of that stock away.

34:56

I thought about that for a while. After

35:01

this period of reflection, I said, no, I

35:03

want it all to go to charity. And

35:06

so it turned out when the

35:08

company went public, that ended up being $30 million.

35:11

And so here I gave away $30 million when I

35:13

was $3 million in the hole. And

35:16

people, including my present wife, said

35:18

I was insane at the time. But

35:24

it was the best decision I ever made. And the reason

35:26

it was was because

35:28

it liberated me. And

35:30

what I mean by that is so

35:32

many people who are

35:34

poor, every action you make is

35:36

not to be poor and

35:38

it holds you prisoner because you look through

35:41

the lens of I have to have

35:43

this. I have to have this to feel safe when

35:46

you can walk away from it all.

35:50

Then you're liberated. It's not driving

35:52

you anymore. And you realize

35:56

it has no meaning. It can't control you.

35:58

Can't make you do things. you don't want to

36:00

do. As an example, I'm sure you

36:02

see there are people, you know, we're

36:04

in Santa Monica right now and I'm

36:06

staying in West Hollywood, you know, there are people who'll

36:08

sell their soul either to

36:11

be famous, to get money, and it

36:13

has no basis on morals, ethics, or

36:16

anything. It's they're fixated on

36:18

money, and money

36:20

gets you nothing. In fact, in

36:23

many cases, it makes you miserable.

36:25

You know,

36:28

in this process, you write inside

36:30

of the book is you reconnected

36:32

with the original true intention and

36:34

meaning behind Ruth's advice, right? Ruth's

36:36

advice. And part

36:38

of that in the book moving forward from here,

36:41

now that the audience is caught up to date

36:43

with the story of where you were at the

36:45

time, is helping people

36:47

understand how to get what they

36:50

actually truly need,

36:52

not necessarily what just shows up on the

36:54

surface of what they want. So I'm

36:58

going to jump around a little bit and

37:00

we're going to come back to the brain,

37:02

but talk to us a little bit about

37:04

that. For people who are trying to clarify

37:06

how to distinguish between the superficial ones and

37:09

the deeper, more meaningful goals, is

37:12

there any exercises, tips, strategies you

37:14

can share with them that

37:16

could help prevent them from having to go

37:19

through their own version of their

37:21

rock bottom? Sure. Well, again, as

37:24

you said, use the word clarify. One,

37:28

you also mentioned that this

37:30

idea we're already manifesting. The

37:34

first exercise is to sit down

37:36

in a quiet space and you can get a

37:38

pen and paper and write it down, but to

37:41

really think through the trajectory of your

37:43

life to date, to

37:46

see what are the mistakes I've

37:48

made. If I repeated these mistakes,

37:51

were my actions aligned

37:54

with who I wanted to be? And

37:57

for most of us, if we do that, we realize...

38:00

we made many wrong turns, but we

38:02

also will see patterns that

38:04

limit us. And also

38:06

understanding that there

38:10

is no outside magic that's going

38:12

to fix everything. And this

38:15

is this idea of taking over your

38:17

self-agency, where you realize that

38:19

within you there's an incredible power

38:22

and tools within yourself that

38:25

actually maximizes your ability to get

38:27

everything you need, not

38:29

necessarily everything you want. And

38:32

for so many, the want though is the

38:34

thing that causes suffering. It's the one thing

38:36

that misguides them. As an example,

38:40

you look at influencers, you

38:42

know, why do they want to be famous?

38:44

Why do they want to appear as if their life

38:46

is perfect? Because they're coming

38:48

from a place of scarcity, emptiness

38:50

and fear. So by putting

38:52

on this act that everything is okay, I

38:55

have everything, look where I'm at today, look

38:57

at my makeup, it's perfect, look who I'm

38:59

with, it's

39:01

a hollow narrative that doesn't get you anything.

39:03

Now the sad part is, as you well

39:05

know, I mean, you have a number

39:09

of sad situations where influencers

39:12

realize the emptiness and they go into

39:14

deep depressions. And unfortunately,

39:16

there's a group of people who follow these

39:18

people who believe the narrative,

39:21

and they go into depression and some

39:23

have committed suicide sadly. Because

39:26

again, when it's self focused, there's

39:29

nothing there. It's only

39:31

through connection, being of

39:33

service. And the reason I say that,

39:35

look at as an example, the blue

39:37

zones, or the work of

39:41

Robert Waldinger at Harvard with the

39:43

longevity study. This these are

39:46

in terms of the blue zones, these are

39:48

people in different parts of the

39:51

world who are happy. And they

39:54

live a long time. Now, in

39:56

regard to the blue zones, people say, well, you know, they

39:59

eat a plant based diet. primarily they exercise,

40:01

they don't smoke, they drink a

40:03

little bit, but all those

40:05

things are important. But the most, most important

40:07

thing is human connection

40:09

and relating to other people,

40:12

depth of relationships. And

40:14

this is true also in the longevity study.

40:16

Why is that important? It

40:18

emphasizes the power, one, of

40:21

your mind by being able

40:23

to focus in these areas which actually

40:25

are good for you in terms of

40:27

your mental and physical health and

40:30

is associated with longevity versus

40:33

saying, I want, I want, I don't care

40:35

about anybody else, I don't need you, it's

40:38

all about me. That is a empty,

40:40

you know, dead-end place

40:42

to be and it's sad because

40:44

people repeatedly confuse that and part

40:46

of it is a narrative

40:49

that we've created in Western society by

40:51

again relating happiness by

40:55

the acquisition of things. And

40:58

you're also distinguishing in the book that there's

41:00

nothing wrong with accumulating some

41:02

things, but if your entire life's

41:04

purpose is things, you're

41:07

gonna end up in a place where you're

41:09

completely unfulfilled. Is that a correct distinction? Yeah,

41:11

you know, I'll give you an interesting example.

41:13

I was in Aspen one time giving a

41:15

talk and I was

41:17

invited to a party put on

41:19

by a very wealthy fellow and

41:22

so we pull up to the residence and, you know, it's

41:24

one of these 30 to 50 million

41:26

dollar mega mansions, right? And

41:29

the guy's a widower and

41:32

he's in his 80s. You open

41:34

the door, there's a painting that's

41:37

like super size of him

41:39

holding a set of skis.

41:42

A sea, a skis, like, you know, skiing on

41:44

the mountain, right? So you walk in

41:46

and I end up talking to the guy and

41:50

he looks at the watch I'm wearing and

41:52

he turns to me and goes, do you know what this is?

41:55

Like, yeah, it's a watch. Because that

41:57

watch is a million dollars. Okay.

42:01

And it says,

42:03

come here. I don't know why he's doing this. Right.

42:05

He says, come here. He takes me out to his

42:07

garage. And you know, there's a Ferrari there. There's a

42:09

Bentley there, etc. Right. And I'm

42:13

going, I'm not sure

42:15

why you're telling me. And

42:18

he says, well, you know, I just want you to know, you

42:20

know, that I worked really hard for

42:22

this. Long story short is

42:24

he then tells me he's miserably

42:27

unhappy. And

42:30

I say, well, look, you have

42:32

all this stuff. Why are you unhappy? He says, I want

42:34

somebody to love me. And

42:37

I said, Okay. And

42:41

he said, I heard you're a guy who, you

42:43

know, coaches people and you have these insights. He

42:46

says, could you help me? And

42:48

I said, yes. He says, how would you

42:50

do that? And I said

42:52

to him, I said, I'll meet with you

42:55

for 10 hours. Okay.

42:58

It'll cost you $1 million. Okay. Now

43:03

here's a guy who's worth hundreds of millions of

43:05

dollars. He

43:07

looks at me goes, how about 500,000?

43:10

You look

43:12

at the guy, and then his daughter

43:15

comes over, she overhears this conversation or

43:18

his granddaughter. And

43:22

she says, it was his

43:24

daughter. But she says, you know, Papa, why,

43:27

why wouldn't you give that to him? That's

43:29

nothing. And you know, you could be happy.

43:32

And he goes, Oh, you don't

43:34

know anything about money or life. You know, that money is

43:36

for you. And she says, I already have more money than

43:38

I can spend. I don't need any more money. He looks

43:41

at me and he says, foolish girl. And

43:44

he never did anything. And

43:47

my point is, here's a guy, he knows

43:50

he's miserable. You can tell by

43:52

his actions of showing

43:54

off, you know, this massive home,

43:56

this million dollar watch, these several

43:58

million dollars in cash. cars,

44:00

there's nothing there. And

44:02

he keeps trying to impress

44:05

people by showing you the

44:07

stuff which has no meaning. Is

44:10

that what you normally charge somebody at that level? Or

44:12

were you just kind of messing with him a little

44:14

bit? I would I

44:16

would hope to God somebody would pay me $100,000 an hour.

44:19

But no, I was just messing with him. And I

44:21

would have charged him that because I would have given

44:23

him what he wanted if he just

44:25

listened. Because I mean,

44:29

the point was, for many people like

44:31

that, there has to be

44:33

a price attached to it for them to think

44:35

it's worth anything. And in fact, actually, that's the

44:38

way it is for most people. In fact, if

44:40

you give away a program, people

44:42

will be suspicious if you charge them for

44:44

it, they think it has value. And it's

44:46

an interesting paradox. You know,

44:49

step one in people going down the path,

44:51

you know, zooming out here for a second,

44:53

actually, I'm going to back up. When

44:55

I think about our interview so far for the 30

44:57

minutes or so that we've been chatting, and

45:00

I'm imagining myself as an audience

45:02

listening to it. And

45:05

I'm hearing that you've written a book

45:07

about manifestation, but how

45:09

manifestation used correctly with

45:12

the right focus can

45:14

actually give you what you need and

45:16

not necessarily what you just think you might want.

45:18

And there's a caveat, which is, you're not denying

45:21

the fact that tapping into the power of manifestation

45:23

could also give you some things in your life.

45:25

And sometimes there are very noble things that are

45:27

there, somebody might be a small

45:29

business owner, and they want to see the size of

45:31

their business double, not necessarily just

45:33

to put extra money in their

45:36

pocket, but to hire more people to pay

45:38

their team members more, you know, it's both

45:40

the interweaving of the selfish and the

45:43

selfless combination of those two

45:45

things that are there. So I'm

45:48

hearing as an audience member is, we

45:51

don't want an extreme of one

45:53

situation or another, we don't want to be the person

45:55

who's solely motivated

45:57

by external things. In

46:00

one aspect you have this gentleman who lives in

46:02

Aspen There's another aspect

46:04

that's there and I would say that the

46:07

other extreme is somebody who Forgoes

46:10

all sense of worldly worldly items

46:12

and says I'm gonna devote myself

46:14

to a cause but their entire

46:16

Identity is wrapped up in they

46:19

have to do something. I'm the protester. I'm

46:21

the activist I'm the person that needs to

46:23

make all sacrifices I don't

46:26

need you know Everybody who stands against it is

46:28

completely against me or this cause and I've met

46:30

people like that Just I'm sure like you've met

46:32

people like that and that would be like in

46:34

another extreme So from an audience

46:36

standpoint they're seeing that you're kind of

46:38

somebody that's navigating them through the middle

46:40

of it Which is there's nothing wrong with

46:42

having things It can't be the sole motivation

46:44

of our life And if we learn how

46:46

to tap into the power of manifestation we

46:48

can actually not just create for ourselves. Yes

46:51

some things But not

46:53

only things the deeper riches that

46:55

we're actually looking for which is

46:57

true connection Impact

47:00

and meaning in the world. Is

47:02

that a fair way to understand the conversation? I

47:05

don't need to say another damn word you've ruined the whole

47:09

No, I think that's exactly right

47:11

and that's an incredible insight, you

47:13

know It's interesting this the extreme

47:15

of this person who you know,

47:17

he sacrifices everything that as is

47:19

as pathologic as in the other

47:21

direction because this guy has created

47:24

a narrative his identity is tied

47:26

up into Sacrificing everything

47:28

and having everybody recognize that

47:31

he sacrificed everything right

47:33

because that Is

47:35

it a thing that he is carrying with

47:37

him that? It causes just

47:40

as much suffering because you see then he looks

47:42

at it. I did this I'm

47:44

doing all of this and I'm against

47:46

the world, but I'm doing it You

47:48

see that's just as the same actually

47:50

as the other direction Yeah,

47:54

of course and that's the challenge now

47:56

I would contrast when you talked about the

47:58

example you gave of a small business

48:00

owner. If the small business

48:03

owner is going

48:05

through the perspective of, okay,

48:07

how can I make the most money? Okay, I'm going

48:09

to raise the prices maximally. I'm going to pay the

48:12

employees the most minimal wage. I'm

48:16

going to figure out a way where

48:18

I can skim my taxes, if

48:22

that's his primary motivator, that

48:24

is wrong. And he's

48:26

going to be unhappy, and he's not going to

48:28

be able to manifest. If it's a

48:30

narrative of, I want this

48:32

business to succeed in this community,

48:35

to be of service to people, to

48:38

offer them goods and services that will

48:40

improve their lives, I

48:42

will pay my employees a fair wage.

48:46

And doing all of that, he

48:48

will prosper. Because again, and

48:51

this gets into some other aspects of the

48:53

book, but then you have an energy about

48:56

you that's a positive energy. And when you

48:58

have positive energy, that actually affects everyone around

49:00

you. You know, the first step

49:02

that you talk about in the book to

49:04

step into that positive energy, when

49:07

it comes to manifestation is

49:09

reclaiming the power of your mind

49:11

to focus. Why

49:13

is focus so key? And how

49:16

do we step away from the

49:19

noise that's causing us

49:21

to be unfocused or

49:24

focused on the wrong thing? Well, I think

49:26

that is a challenge, especially in modern society,

49:28

because we have so many distractions. And

49:31

whatever social media platform you're talking

49:33

about, you I'm

49:36

sure appreciate and many of your audience

49:38

members may, but you know,

49:40

these people hire neuroscientists and psychologists

49:43

to figure out how to make somebody

49:45

addicted to their narrative, their

49:47

social media platform. And it is

49:50

a time sink that takes people

49:52

away from doing all sorts of wonderful

49:54

things. But again, you have

49:56

to reclaim your ability to focus, as

49:58

I was saying earlier. what

50:00

Ruth taught me was how to

50:02

focus. And because

50:05

that's the only time you can learn and

50:08

that's the only time you're present when we

50:11

have your attention, your full undivided

50:13

attention. So I think

50:15

that's a critical

50:17

aspect of regaining your

50:20

attention, but it takes effort and

50:23

but it's readily available. And once you reclaim

50:25

your attention, then you can direct

50:28

your attention and then you

50:30

can direct your intention

50:32

inward to impact

50:35

your subconscious. And

50:37

what happens is when you have an intention

50:40

and you use your attention to

50:42

embed your intention into

50:44

your subconscious, then the

50:46

process of these cognitive brain

50:48

networks, which are parts of the

50:50

brains that work together in different

50:52

circumstances, then it empowers them.

50:55

And as I was mentioning, as

50:58

an example, we have this thing called the

51:00

Salience Network. So once you are able to

51:02

embed your intention

51:05

there, then that creates

51:07

this process on a subconscious level

51:09

where you're looking both internally and

51:12

externally for events that actually will

51:14

make you manifest your intention. And

51:17

this is also where your attention network

51:21

gets empowered, if you will,

51:23

because once you are searching

51:25

around, finding those things

51:27

that will connect you and manifest

51:29

your intention, then that will activate

51:32

your attention network. So

51:34

you then become focused on that. And

51:36

it will then downplay your default mode

51:38

network. And also the nature

51:40

of what we call your executive control

51:43

network will actually make

51:46

it manifest, if you will, because

51:48

when your executive control network is empowered,

51:51

it is actually the to-do part of

51:53

your brain, it makes it happen. So

51:55

once you embed your intention, That

51:58

then activates your attention network. The

52:00

Settlements Network which then empowers your

52:02

attention. That works which then allows

52:05

your Executive Control network to actually

52:07

make that intention manifest. Maybe that

52:09

was all confusing? Now I'm with

52:11

you and with you and people

52:14

can always hit rewind the he

52:16

hosts and practice. Your. Senses

52:18

say exactly and the thing is

52:20

in the book or there's actually

52:23

a a six week program. The

52:25

goes through every aspect of this

52:27

which is a one our understanding

52:29

what you have been manifest in

52:31

how innocently that may be and

52:33

and why you're doing that and

52:35

then actually clarifying your intention. And

52:38

then actually embedding your intention. If

52:41

there was one thing that people listening to,

52:43

they. Could. Start. And. One

52:46

possibility of something that they

52:48

might stop, for example, to

52:50

strengthen this power of attention.

52:52

Which. Goes back to this stuff One

52:54

reclaim your power to focus your

52:56

mind. What? Would be something

52:59

that you might suggest of them. One thing

53:01

that they could start and maybe one thing

53:03

they could stop it. One of the problems

53:05

and I have is that I have a

53:07

chance to to say I have to do

53:10

this summer to do it now and I

53:12

picked something that's really hard and complicated or

53:14

Gambon A do it and invariably she do

53:16

that. You almost always sales. The most important

53:18

thing is baby steps and you look at

53:20

a book as exempt by Bj Fog which

53:23

is call I think Tiny Habits and that

53:25

has never been called atomic Habits. But if

53:27

you look at. Changing little things

53:29

in your life, Will.

53:32

Word. They actually become habits

53:34

In some ways that's learning

53:36

how to embed your intention

53:38

If you're doing just one

53:41

thing okay and you're making

53:43

it happen, That in and

53:45

of itself is a process

53:47

of focusing your intention and.

53:50

Creating. These little habits can be

53:52

extraordinarily powerful because what happens is

53:55

when you're not directing your attention,

53:57

then you're you're wondering around Asked.

54:00

And once you start doing things

54:02

that require this effort, you realize

54:04

how powerful that is to make

54:06

things manifest. and you start small.

54:08

and then you've moved to larger

54:10

things. I think the other thing

54:12

is, you have to. Give.

54:16

Up attachment to the outcome. Because

54:19

again, And

54:22

this may sound strange, but in some

54:24

ways were time. But the difference between

54:26

fear and love and what I mean

54:28

by that is attachment to an outcome.

54:30

In some ways crates anxiety and stress,

54:33

which is a manifestation of engagement of

54:35

your sympathetic nervous system which fundamentally is

54:37

a fear reaction. Okay, so if you're

54:39

tache to that, you're always worried about

54:41

that. I have to get there a

54:43

half to get there. Yet the very.

54:46

Nature of that internal dialogue

54:48

is actually working against you,

54:50

and that's not to say

54:52

having a goal is an

54:54

important it's to. That

54:57

call become so prominent that there

54:59

that's the only way. Yet We

55:01

know from manifestation that it can

55:03

take a different pass and turns

55:05

and in some ways it is

55:07

smarter than you are about knowing

55:10

the best way for something to

55:12

happen. As example, let's say you

55:14

wanted. Ah,

55:18

Ah let's say at a different house

55:20

and you created this whole a narrative

55:22

about that and the narrative been no

55:25

I want this bigger house because I

55:27

have a large number of children, has

55:29

a larger yard and and not just

55:31

I want this house to impress up

55:33

began to different perspectives. But if you

55:35

go through all of that and say

55:37

I wanted in this place in this

55:39

neighborhood and I want to this big

55:41

data data does and go through this

55:43

whole exercise and then suddenly another opportunity

55:45

comes up which is a completely different

55:48

type of house than you imagine. But

55:50

then once you get into it you

55:52

realize actually that was a much better

55:54

choice for me for all these different

55:56

reasons. let's say oh it turned out

55:58

that the school the best school on

56:00

it you know in the area was

56:02

there and that's where my children will

56:04

go. That's a much better than the

56:06

place I had initially picked because your

56:09

subconscious is sorting through all this different

56:11

information that had a subconscious level so

56:13

you don't appreciate it. and so when

56:15

you get a different alternate may suffix

56:17

that's crude. I wanted this. why didn't

56:19

that happened While they're all sorts of

56:21

other things that were going on there

56:23

that you weren't aware us and that

56:25

in some ways your subconscious actually guides

56:27

you sometimes to a better choice. When

56:32

a lot of us go back and we look at

56:34

our life and some of the key. Things.

56:36

That were proud about. Could. Be

56:38

finding a partner. A. Job maybe

56:40

that you got involved in. So. Much

56:42

of it when you look back if he really

56:44

pay attention to it, So. Many

56:46

of the good things that have happened to us. That.

56:49

Have made us where we are Today has

56:51

happened largely because of some version of happenstance.

56:54

And so. I'm continuously

56:56

amazed at how a lot of

56:58

us, including me forget about the

57:00

power that. We. Might

57:02

have wanted one thing and yet life took

57:05

a different course. And. It sounds

57:07

like you're saying our subconscious could be involved. And.

57:09

We got something better than what

57:11

we could have ever imagined. and

57:13

I think that's exactly right in.

57:15

this is the nature of Synchronicity

57:17

or which I talked about in

57:19

the Book or Serendipity as you

57:21

want to call it that's Ah

57:23

is that often times the way

57:25

these events occur again on a

57:27

conscious level. We don't understand why

57:29

they occur, but they occur for

57:32

a recent Ah that actually is

57:34

much more powerful than what our

57:36

initial ah go was in terms

57:38

of our manifesting and. That some

57:40

of the extraordinary things about it

57:42

is that once you are able

57:44

to unleash this incredible power that

57:46

you have with then and embed

57:48

your intention which I talk about

57:50

these techniques in the book is

57:53

this almost gives a direct line

57:55

and to your subconscious which allows

57:57

it and I think I use

57:59

example. A

58:01

Bloodhound. You give it a mission or

58:04

sense and the subconscious bloodhound starts going

58:06

around. Are looking at the circumstances. I'm

58:08

sure you've been at a party and

58:10

that's there's a lot of noise, but

58:13

if you hear your name. You

58:16

immediately turned to his rights because

58:18

it's deeply embedded in your subconscious.

58:20

The same is true when you

58:22

let the blood handlers. As an

58:24

example, there was a project I'm

58:26

working on right now and again.

58:28

I use these techniques of manifesting.

58:31

And I was at a coffee

58:33

shops and again l very loud.

58:35

but a fellow about two tables

58:37

over started talking about something exactly

58:40

related to this project. It's and

58:42

I turned and acts. I went

58:44

over in, introduced myself, and we're

58:46

working on a project together now.

58:48

Rights. And this is how this

58:50

works. Because on and on a

58:53

subconscious level, this blood, how does

58:55

always looking around to make Serendipity

58:57

or Synchronicity happen? And that's the

58:59

way it works. One

59:01

of the areas that. Often.

59:03

Gets. Misconstrued.

59:06

With manifestation that you chat about was in

59:08

the book. Is. Idea that. Is.

59:11

Devoid of action, Can. You

59:13

talk about. The. Relationship between

59:15

manifestation. And. Action: If

59:17

there was maybe an additional criticism that might

59:20

be there about something like the secret, I'm

59:22

gonna ask you what you did like about

59:24

the secret and a little bit too. I

59:26

want to be fair to you know that

59:28

you know that work or body of. At

59:31

but one of the criticism would be

59:34

that people walked away thinking that. Action

59:37

is an important part of that

59:39

equation. Interaction: Yeah I at the

59:41

start the book I said you

59:43

know the universe does he give

59:45

us about two Or but I

59:47

would also say got only helps

59:49

those who helps itself us. What

59:51

I mean by that is it's

59:53

not like you just sit down

59:56

to go to. I want this

59:58

and it's one and done. I

1:00:00

mean it takes work and as

1:00:02

you know, ah ah the the

1:00:04

main ways to embed your intention

1:00:06

ah is to make it familiar

1:00:08

because the brain doesn't know the

1:00:10

difference between what's real and what's

1:00:12

not real. And by writing down

1:00:15

by are reading silently, reading aloud,

1:00:17

visualizing that taking place, seen yourself

1:00:19

in that position. And

1:00:21

when I was a kid I literally

1:00:23

would do this ten, fifteen, twenty times

1:00:25

a day. I mean, I had this

1:00:28

list of ten thanks and I wanted

1:00:30

and I would just go through it

1:00:32

all day long. Now some people talk

1:00:34

about vision boards ah, anything to constantly

1:00:36

remind you and put at the top

1:00:38

of your list. But there's another aspect

1:00:40

which is the reality that. The

1:00:44

brain receives about. Ten

1:00:47

million bits of information a second

1:00:49

to your sensory organs and course

1:00:51

that defines who urine is primarily

1:00:54

related to homeostasis. On.

1:00:57

A conscious level were only able to

1:00:59

process fifty two hundred. But.

1:01:02

That's fifty two hundred. We

1:01:04

can actually direct with intention

1:01:06

into our subconscious through something

1:01:08

called value Tag Team. We

1:01:11

put a value on it.

1:01:13

Than that stimulates the sale

1:01:15

ads network on an unconscious

1:01:17

level to constantly be looking

1:01:19

around for opportunities to have

1:01:21

that intention manifest and it

1:01:23

directs our attention to that.

1:01:26

And then once that happens

1:01:28

and we see an opportunity

1:01:30

to again that stimulates or

1:01:32

empower Six Sq control network

1:01:34

which gives you access to

1:01:36

memory experiences and also the

1:01:38

to do part of far

1:01:40

manifesting and is so using

1:01:43

the technique with intention of

1:01:45

taking the information that has

1:01:47

set a conscious level and

1:01:49

if you will value tag

1:01:51

in it than that ah

1:01:53

six it in the subconscious

1:01:55

and. gives it

1:01:57

the greatest likelihood manifests in

1:01:59

awesome think, well,

1:02:01

I should be able to manifest anything I

1:02:03

want. It doesn't work that way. Nothing's 100%.

1:02:05

And as I said, it

1:02:08

doesn't always work out the way you think

1:02:10

it should. And

1:02:12

also, it doesn't often work in

1:02:14

the timeline you would like. I

1:02:16

mean, there's some people say, well, you know, I want

1:02:18

this mansion to magically appear, and I'm going to give

1:02:21

it till next week. And if it doesn't, you

1:02:23

know, this whole thing is a failure. Again,

1:02:25

there's no way it works like that at

1:02:27

all. And again, to maximally

1:02:30

have this work, I will again, will

1:02:32

suggest you you have to change your

1:02:35

perception of how

1:02:38

you see the world. It has

1:02:40

to be, in my opinion, in the context

1:02:42

of how can I do

1:02:44

actions that improve the lives

1:02:47

of others or have a larger

1:02:49

meaning beyond myself? By

1:02:51

doing so, you benefit, you benefit

1:02:53

in all sorts of ways. And

1:02:56

you know, we were talking about compassion. In some

1:02:59

ways, having that perspective is

1:03:01

a compassionate act.

1:03:04

When you are compassionate based on

1:03:06

our evolution, every part

1:03:08

of your physiology works better. You're

1:03:11

happier, you're more open, you're

1:03:13

more thoughtful, your physiology works

1:03:15

its best, your heart rate

1:03:17

variability is decreased, which is a

1:03:19

good thing. Your heart rate is

1:03:22

decreased, your blood pressure is decreased, your

1:03:24

immune systems boosted, your cortisol or stress

1:03:26

hormone levels are diminished, the expression

1:03:29

of inflammatory proteins are decreased,

1:03:32

all from being thoughtful and kind and compassionate

1:03:34

and look at the world through the lens

1:03:37

of how can I be of service and

1:03:39

improve the world? You have

1:03:42

a dramatic positive impact on yourself.

1:03:44

But the very nature of that

1:03:46

it changes your goals and aspirations.

1:03:48

You realize yes, it's nice

1:03:50

to have a Ferrari, but it's not the

1:03:52

Ferrari, the Ferrari doesn't identify me, I don't

1:03:54

need it, but it's nice to have it

1:03:56

if it's there. And you're not attached

1:03:59

to that you're not a attached to these things

1:04:03

which people confuse with them

1:04:06

and somehow having more makes

1:04:09

people feel better about themselves when at the end of

1:04:11

the day they don't feel better about themselves. And that's

1:04:13

the sad situation. You know, you

1:04:16

see some of these extraordinarily wealthy people, you know,

1:04:18

they have 10 homes, you know, they each cost

1:04:20

$10 million apiece. They have

1:04:23

a $100 million yacht and

1:04:25

they fly everywhere. And all they're doing is

1:04:27

running away because they're trying to find the

1:04:29

next experience like, I'm going to be with this

1:04:31

celebrity. I'm going to be at this dinner. I'm going

1:04:34

to be at the yacht. But

1:04:36

it's all about the thing. It's not about a

1:04:38

deep seated sense of happiness. And the horribly sad

1:04:40

thing is for so many of these people, they're

1:04:43

so fixated on that, that

1:04:46

they have lost this and

1:04:48

they're running around chasing nothing.

1:04:50

When simply by changing their perspective,

1:04:52

they could enhance the lives of

1:04:56

thousands, if not hundreds of thousands of people

1:04:59

by just a small amount of

1:05:02

the resources that they have. When

1:05:05

you take an inventory of your life today and

1:05:07

you're thinking about things that you want to put

1:05:09

your attention on, both for yourself and

1:05:11

for the betterment of all the projects that you're

1:05:13

involved in and the different leaders around the world

1:05:15

that you work with, how are

1:05:18

you approaching what you actually

1:05:20

want to manifest? Does it look like

1:05:22

some sort of traditional goal

1:05:24

setting? Is it more spontaneous or

1:05:26

do you use any other framework

1:05:29

to actually get clear on what you

1:05:31

want to bring and allow

1:05:34

to unfold in your life? Again,

1:05:36

like I was mentioning, habits, the

1:05:40

way my mindset is, I work

1:05:45

on projects that obviously

1:05:47

benefit me in some way, but

1:05:50

almost all of them, in fact, pretty much all

1:05:52

of them are focused on being

1:05:54

of service. As an example, there's

1:05:56

a company I started called Happy.ai

1:06:00

H-A-P-P-I.ai and

1:06:03

it is a

1:06:05

actually a mental health counselor for

1:06:08

individuals who have stress

1:06:10

and anxiety and loneliness associated with

1:06:13

living in the modern world. The

1:06:16

unique thing about it is that it

1:06:18

uses an emotion assessment engine combined with

1:06:20

a AI knowledge base

1:06:23

of psychology and compassion focused therapy

1:06:25

actually connected to a human avatar. And

1:06:28

so the avatar actually talks to you and

1:06:31

guides you in terms of queries you

1:06:33

have about things that are causing you

1:06:35

distress. And so on

1:06:38

the one hand it's a private business

1:06:41

but on the other hand its goal is

1:06:43

to be of service and it's

1:06:46

very much structured to it's

1:06:48

not going after how can I

1:06:51

look at every customer as a profit

1:06:53

center. It's saying

1:06:55

we need to make X to survive

1:06:57

and to satisfy

1:06:59

our investors but the goal here

1:07:01

is primarily to be of service. And

1:07:07

also as an example I'm working on

1:07:09

a project, a compassionate countries

1:07:11

index where

1:07:13

we look at different countries and

1:07:17

see how they are functioning

1:07:19

in terms of for the individual in terms of

1:07:21

thriving, what the country is doing

1:07:23

and what the countries obligations are to the rest of

1:07:25

the world. And so again this is

1:07:28

outwardly focused but the benefit of that

1:07:30

is that it

1:07:35

will if it's successful allow me

1:07:37

to do other interesting projects. And

1:07:39

again nothing to me

1:07:42

at least is more deep

1:07:44

than connecting with people and making

1:07:46

their lives better. It's

1:07:49

pretty simple and

1:07:52

I think that's what you're trying to do and

1:07:54

I think using the

1:07:57

different techniques we describe this

1:07:59

allows allows you to live

1:08:02

a happy life, a life of

1:08:04

meaning and purpose, but also understand that

1:08:08

it's great to have things. The things

1:08:11

aren't the point, though. It's to

1:08:13

enjoy them, it's not to get lost in them. So

1:08:17

once you've gotten, to take this one

1:08:19

step further, once you've gotten clarification

1:08:21

on some larger goals, projects, things that you

1:08:23

want to give love to, within

1:08:25

each of those, there's going to be micro

1:08:27

things that you want to do. You've gotten

1:08:29

the macro clear. Do

1:08:33

you have a framework or methodology

1:08:35

that you use to support the

1:08:38

principles that you were taught by Ruth, in

1:08:40

addition to the mindful practices? Again, you outline

1:08:42

a lot of them in the book. Making

1:08:45

sure that you are not in constant fight or

1:08:47

flight, making sure that your nervous system is set

1:08:50

up in a beautiful way, making sure you're practicing

1:08:53

mindfulness techniques on a regular basis, meditation,

1:08:55

you've written about that. Is

1:08:58

there anything else that you do? Are you actively

1:09:00

a journaler? Do

1:09:02

you practice any kind of vision boarding

1:09:04

that's there that allows you

1:09:06

to tap

1:09:09

into these things to help supercharge

1:09:11

those projects? Yes. So I have a

1:09:13

list of things I want to

1:09:15

accomplish. And I will tell you, one

1:09:19

has been sitting for 16 years, but

1:09:22

it's an important one and I still put

1:09:24

effort into it. And it may or may

1:09:26

not manifest in my lifetime. But

1:09:28

yeah, so I have a list of things that I go

1:09:31

through. And I

1:09:33

review what I have written about

1:09:35

them and look at the different

1:09:39

aspects of connections I

1:09:41

have to make

1:09:43

them manifest. And I think

1:09:45

about it. I mean, I

1:09:47

will actually meditate about that particular project.

1:09:50

And what I find is that when I do that, it

1:09:53

unfreeze my mind in the sense I'm

1:09:55

not just focusing everywhere on these different

1:09:58

things. I focus on that. And

1:10:00

I sit with that and then I

1:10:02

see all these different connections that can happen. And

1:10:07

then hopefully they do manifest. As an

1:10:09

example, I've been working on creating

1:10:12

an international day of compassion. So

1:10:18

one of the aspects of that is you need to have a

1:10:22

leader of government write a letter in

1:10:24

support of this, right? Well, I

1:10:26

just happened to be in Hyderabad

1:10:28

and in Ashram and Modi

1:10:30

ended up coming there and he had planned to come

1:10:32

there, but getting him on

1:10:34

board with this project. The President of

1:10:36

India? Yes, yes. Or I

1:10:41

was reached out to by the King of Bhutan, who

1:10:45

I just happened to end up talking

1:10:48

after they asked me to and now I'm

1:10:50

heading to Bhutan to talk about this further

1:10:52

with him. So did

1:10:55

I plan from the start that it was

1:10:57

going to be these two individuals? No,

1:11:00

but that's where the process

1:11:03

led me, right? But you do

1:11:05

actively think about these things. You meditate

1:11:07

on them, you get messages

1:11:11

from what? Your subconscious? Yes,

1:11:13

absolutely. In terms of possibilities

1:11:15

that would allow these things

1:11:17

to further and even

1:11:19

some insights about what would be the

1:11:21

pathway to it and then do you

1:11:24

write those things down? Yes, yes. And

1:11:26

sometimes I will write them down and

1:11:29

I will rewrite them and refine the vision.

1:11:32

And yes,

1:11:34

and so that's sort of the

1:11:37

process actually. And so many

1:11:39

of the techniques that people are familiar

1:11:41

with, they are powerful. It's just tweaking

1:11:43

them a little bit in the context

1:11:45

of how you activate your mind

1:11:48

to make the manifest are really the

1:11:50

keys here. I'm not dismissing manifestation

1:11:54

and some of the techniques that have

1:11:57

been described. What I Am Dismissing

1:11:59

is the. Blue and the pseudoscience

1:12:01

the floats around with says and

1:12:03

that limits people as examples. Sort

1:12:05

of been self focused when it

1:12:07

in the power isn't actually been

1:12:09

of service to others and then

1:12:11

you getting all the other thanks

1:12:14

is not. I want this first

1:12:16

and the other thing doesn't matter.

1:12:18

The other thing is the most

1:12:20

important thing. When. It comes

1:12:22

to the topic of manifestation one. Thing.

1:12:24

That I often hear from my

1:12:26

audience. whenever. A concert

1:12:29

goers manifestation stranding their

1:12:31

focuses. What? If you're somebody

1:12:33

that actually he. Doesn't. Know.

1:12:36

What? They want in life. But.

1:12:38

Rather feels that the life of their living right

1:12:40

now. There's. Something more there for

1:12:42

them. They just don't know what. What

1:12:44

would your recommendation to this? personally? I

1:12:47

think that's an excellent question. I would suggest

1:12:49

is probably lot of those people who don't

1:12:51

know for sure what they want. In fact.

1:12:54

Actually, I have many friends, you know I

1:12:56

knew in fourth grade I was going to

1:12:58

be a doctor. Law makes a pretty secure.

1:13:01

An issue? Well, I manifested

1:13:04

that to A. but I

1:13:06

have friends who are in

1:13:08

their thirties forties who still

1:13:10

have no clue and they

1:13:12

sort of get bounced around.

1:13:14

I think that. ah, that's

1:13:16

okay, I. Think if you

1:13:19

a tune yourself So again ah

1:13:21

to looking at the world through

1:13:23

the lens of how can I

1:13:25

be helpful That in some ways

1:13:27

gives you direction. Ah,

1:13:29

Vs worrying about if your house

1:13:32

is bigger than the next person

1:13:34

so you're driving the latest car

1:13:36

again that's where people get sidetracked.

1:13:38

Ah so if you go to

1:13:40

if you live a life looking

1:13:42

at the world to this idea

1:13:44

of what are the actions I

1:13:46

can do to just be helpful.

1:13:50

the world seems to have ah a

1:13:52

desire to help you now says true

1:13:55

hundred percent of town of course not

1:13:57

have people had horrible things happen to

1:13:59

them who sort of

1:14:01

were on the right track, of course. And

1:14:03

that's why on some level, you

1:14:06

know, people say, well, you

1:14:09

know, the universe is against me. The

1:14:12

reality is that there's

1:14:14

so many different things going on that we

1:14:17

can't control everything. And even doing

1:14:19

everything the absolute correct way will

1:14:22

lead to disappointment. And that

1:14:24

is the way it is. You know, I use

1:14:27

this technique of having an

1:14:34

optimistic disposition or dispositional

1:14:37

optimism. And the idea

1:14:39

is that I have a

1:14:41

deep seated belief that things will

1:14:43

work out the best for me. I

1:14:47

have a deep seated belief that if I'm

1:14:49

kind and thoughtful, that that will

1:14:51

be a tool to make that happen. But

1:14:54

I also accept that I have no control

1:14:56

over things and on

1:14:58

some level, and that all I can do is the

1:15:01

best I can do. But

1:15:06

have I had major disappointments? Of course,

1:15:08

then I, the

1:15:11

key is not to get lost in them.

1:15:13

The key is to understand that disappointment, the

1:15:18

ups and downs are just part of life. And

1:15:21

yes, people have some horrible circumstances and

1:15:23

yes, people unfortunately are in circumstances which

1:15:26

they have absolutely no control and they're

1:15:28

suffering and being punished for things that

1:15:30

are not in any way their fault.

1:15:33

And I cannot sit here

1:15:36

and tell you, geez, just do everything in my

1:15:38

book and life is gonna be roses. It's not

1:15:40

gonna work out that way. Unfortunately, it doesn't work

1:15:42

out that way. And I do not have every

1:15:44

answer for the world suffering. So I'm not gonna

1:15:47

pretend that, oh, just read my book and you'll

1:15:49

have a happy life. There

1:15:51

are circumstances that are

1:15:53

horrible that people have to live through or

1:15:55

die from. And I do

1:15:57

not have any control Over things.

1:16:00

That have nord as anyone else

1:16:02

I believe have the power to

1:16:04

make those instantly disappear or make

1:16:06

them get better. I wish I

1:16:08

did. Ah but it also begs

1:16:10

the point that to each of

1:16:12

us though has a world in

1:16:14

which we live in in with

1:16:16

in that circumstance we can have

1:16:18

an impact and so or what

1:16:20

I suggest to people as within

1:16:23

your sphere of influence and your

1:16:25

ability to have an impact that

1:16:27

use it to. To

1:16:29

make people's. Lives better and sometimes that's

1:16:32

just ah same hello to somebody.

1:16:34

Sometimes it's bind them a meal,

1:16:36

sometimes it's just reaching how to

1:16:38

say seem, ah hurt her, upset

1:16:40

it's and again this is the

1:16:42

been presence. It's been present that

1:16:44

actually results and a happy life.

1:16:46

Your present to events that are

1:16:48

happening every step of the way

1:16:50

versus as you know there are

1:16:52

people who they set a goal

1:16:54

and they discard everything in their

1:16:56

pathway to get to the goal.

1:16:59

Because. The goal was the tenement to

1:17:01

the only thing that is important in

1:17:03

their lives. and they miss their lies

1:17:05

because you're focused on that. not slightly

1:17:08

Cellos who are. Now we have people

1:17:10

who say, you know, I wake up

1:17:12

at four in the morning and I

1:17:14

run half marathon and then I eat

1:17:16

nineteen hundred calories a day and then

1:17:19

I go. And I do this. And

1:17:21

I do that well. What type of

1:17:23

a life as that other than sort

1:17:25

of a selfish ah, ah, Narcissistic.

1:17:29

View of the world itself. But this is

1:17:32

only my opinion. There are some of these

1:17:34

people have millions of followers so you could

1:17:36

argue for I know nothing. Where were they

1:17:38

have millions of followers? Are they only have

1:17:41

one Follow. Ah, The.

1:17:43

Real question is is that life working for

1:17:45

them. And. Maybe there could be a situation,

1:17:47

a circumstance somebody wants to go through appeared of life

1:17:49

where they really want to. Challenge.

1:17:52

Themselves. And they want

1:17:54

to. Overcome. Limiting.

1:17:56

Beliefs and at that point out your life they're

1:17:58

focused on that. And they could

1:18:01

end up being somebody who might be.

1:18:05

Deeply. Happy Present know

1:18:07

I think you're absolutely right and I

1:18:09

think kids your point about limiting beliefs.

1:18:11

People are suffering and they will do

1:18:13

actions that overcome those limiting beliefs. I

1:18:15

think the problem is for some of

1:18:18

those people though as the statement as

1:18:20

if I do it and you're not

1:18:22

able to do it. You're. A

1:18:24

loser I: this is the mass ejection

1:18:26

to the audience yes I think. unfortunately

1:18:28

for some people this is the message

1:18:30

and they beat themselves up everyday. Said

1:18:32

of you know this guy said he

1:18:35

does this. I've been working on this

1:18:37

yeah know and I can't do it

1:18:39

and you know at why isn't it

1:18:41

possible for me? So I think there

1:18:43

is a balance like there is with

1:18:45

everything and so yes some of these

1:18:47

techniques to make you healthier and to

1:18:49

overcome these limiting police which is really

1:18:51

what we're talking about. nature manifestation your

1:18:53

own created. Limiting beliefs. Because.

1:18:57

You have to overcome those to

1:18:59

have the power to change your

1:19:01

life. And so I think that

1:19:03

is important. You know

1:19:05

again I'm taking this to the extreme that

1:19:07

happens to some individuals who are in fact

1:19:10

I know a guy who were he sort

1:19:12

of that way and he says you know

1:19:14

you're you're a loser man because you don't

1:19:17

do these things I said that by don't

1:19:19

think anybody's a looser I think people have

1:19:21

different pass into a it's not fair to

1:19:23

cost is that he had of a not

1:19:26

everybody is you right. Of

1:19:28

course for sure your topic of limiting

1:19:30

beliefs as a whole section the book

1:19:32

is step three which is removed the

1:19:34

obstacles in your mind and it goes

1:19:37

deep in in This topic of identifying

1:19:39

these limiting beliefs are holding us back

1:19:41

Here You mention. Just. Before he

1:19:43

and his part of a conversation disappointments, we've

1:19:45

all had disappointments. Not like we've all had

1:19:48

things that have gone. Not. According

1:19:50

to plan and sometimes severely

1:19:52

feel like we might have

1:19:54

been. In

1:19:57

a disenfranchised by something were wronged by

1:19:59

us. It. And then

1:20:02

there are times where those things can

1:20:04

permanently hold people back because

1:20:06

they've contributed to, added on, built

1:20:08

upon a limiting belief. You

1:20:11

talk about some techniques that people

1:20:13

can use, which is step

1:20:15

one, is even identifying that you have a

1:20:17

limiting belief in the first place. What

1:20:20

are some of those techniques that you talk about? Well,

1:20:22

I think the most important thing

1:20:24

is actually identifying them because,

1:20:26

again, many of us go through

1:20:28

life, as we were talking about

1:20:31

earlier, we talk about, we

1:20:39

have a vision, we're always trying to

1:20:41

manifest, but we don't have any understanding

1:20:43

of how manifestation works. One of the

1:20:46

impairments of manifesting is limiting beliefs,

1:20:48

and a narrative that you tell yourself,

1:20:50

which many people do, which is,

1:20:52

I'm not good enough, I'm not worthy,

1:20:54

I don't deserve love, it's not

1:20:56

possible. And as soon

1:20:58

as you say something like that, that

1:21:01

becomes your reality. So having

1:21:04

self-affirmation, being kind to yourself, and

1:21:06

again, it's like some of these

1:21:09

other aspects of manifestation, you

1:21:11

have a list, and you repeat them,

1:21:14

you have actually a list of

1:21:16

affirmations you tell yourself, and

1:21:19

unlimited possibilities that you tell yourself

1:21:21

over and over again, so that

1:21:24

that becomes the dominant narrative, not,

1:21:26

I hate myself, I'm never going to be

1:21:29

anything. I think that's probably the most

1:21:32

powerful one. One of the

1:21:34

techniques that I use, which is actually from

1:21:36

my first book, but I still use to,

1:21:39

if you will, balance me and not get

1:21:41

me lost in sort of

1:21:44

my own limiting beliefs, if you will,

1:21:46

as I go through a mental exercise

1:21:49

every morning, and it

1:21:51

sets my intention for the day, and

1:21:53

it gives me the tools not to

1:21:56

get lost one in aspects of our

1:22:02

modern world that distracts me,

1:22:05

but also empowers

1:22:07

me. And so what I do is I

1:22:09

wake up every day and I sit by

1:22:11

the side of the bed and

1:22:14

I actually do a breathing exercise, which

1:22:17

I know you know, and many listeners, the

1:22:19

very nature of doing a breathing

1:22:21

exercise actually engages your

1:22:24

parasympathetic nervous system, right? And that's where

1:22:26

you're more open, you're more thoughtful, you're

1:22:28

more creative, you're more productive, your

1:22:30

physiology works its best. And

1:22:33

I do that for a little bit. And then

1:22:35

I go through an exercise of thinking

1:22:37

of the awe that inspires

1:22:40

me in this world. And

1:22:42

then also the

1:22:44

joy of living in this world. And

1:22:46

then I go through this alphabet of the heart. And

1:22:50

it's 10 letters of the alphabet. D

1:22:53

for compassion for self and others, D

1:22:55

recognizing the dignity of every person, E

1:22:58

practicing equanimity, F practicing

1:23:02

forgiveness, G having gratitude, H

1:23:04

is humility, I is

1:23:06

having integrity and values that bind you, J

1:23:09

is for justice or responsibility

1:23:11

for caring for

1:23:13

the vulnerable, K is

1:23:16

kindness, all of this is contained by love.

1:23:18

And you know, when I talked about earlier,

1:23:20

this is this distinction between fear

1:23:23

and love. When

1:23:26

you walk with the world with fear, you create

1:23:29

a perception in your head of

1:23:31

scarcity, you grab on to things, you

1:23:33

want things, and you're insecure about yourself.

1:23:35

So you grab on to things that

1:23:37

you think will make you look

1:23:40

better to others, because you're

1:23:42

always looking for outside affirmation, versus

1:23:45

when you're able to let that go.

1:23:47

And look through the other lens, it

1:23:51

opens things up for you, there is no

1:23:53

scarcity. Everything is

1:23:55

possible. The

1:23:57

world is a generous and kind place. It's

1:23:59

not something to be scared of. And

1:24:02

when you look at through that lens,

1:24:04

you make many more connections with people

1:24:06

and actually people want to help you.

1:24:08

And one of the most important aspects

1:24:10

of manifesting is to create

1:24:12

this energy about you where people want

1:24:14

to connect with you and help

1:24:16

you. And I'm sure

1:24:18

you have met people who

1:24:20

you meet them. And there's

1:24:22

this incredible energy about them, this joy

1:24:25

about them. And you're going, wow, I

1:24:27

want to be around these this person.

1:24:29

I mean, it's incredible. And then

1:24:31

there are other people who you meet and you want to get away from

1:24:34

as quickly as possible. And

1:24:36

the reality is what people don't appreciate

1:24:38

is when we reattune our psyche, if

1:24:41

you will, it changes your vibrational energy.

1:24:43

Now, I know in some

1:24:47

spheres of wuwness and pseudoscience, people

1:24:49

use this and make up all

1:24:51

sorts of aspects of

1:24:53

this. But many of what

1:24:55

they say is true based on neuroscience.

1:24:57

As an example, your heart puts out

1:25:00

an energy that goes five

1:25:02

or six feet beyond you. And

1:25:04

it has an impact on others. And

1:25:06

when you carry that energy with you,

1:25:09

it sort of changes the environment. And

1:25:11

in fact, I'm sure you probably know,

1:25:13

as an example, if you have a

1:25:15

group of women who live together, over

1:25:17

time, their periods were synchronized, will

1:25:20

synchronize. And when you're around people and you

1:25:22

carry that energy, and there are

1:25:24

other people like that, that creates an immense amount

1:25:26

of power and connection between those other

1:25:29

people. In fact, you even look at a metronome,

1:25:31

which is an inanimate object,

1:25:34

theoretically, a metronome, or

1:25:37

a non living object, if

1:25:39

you put five of them together on a

1:25:41

table, at some point,

1:25:43

their oscillations will match.

1:25:45

And so there is this energy about

1:25:47

you that you do have some control

1:25:50

over. It's just that you have to

1:25:52

learn how to embrace

1:25:55

it and use it to your advantage. So

1:25:58

basically telling people that if they get that

1:26:00

bad vibes from somebody pay

1:26:02

attention to that because there might be something there.

1:26:05

I would say that can be very, very true.

1:26:08

I think the kids these days call it a vibe check. You

1:26:12

know, it's funny you say that because there

1:26:14

are all these abbreviations people use, which, you

1:26:16

know, you get text messages from, I guess,

1:26:19

are they adolescents we call them or is it

1:26:21

Gen Z years now? And I

1:26:23

have no clue what they're, you

1:26:25

know, like IRL. What is that in

1:26:27

real life, right? Yeah,

1:26:30

yeah. Well, so I

1:26:36

heard you on another podcast you did

1:26:38

recently where you were alluding to one

1:26:41

way, one practice that you

1:26:43

can use to identify

1:26:47

limiting beliefs is to catch

1:26:49

yourself being critical of yourself.

1:26:52

What are the common areas where you

1:26:54

quietly people don't even realize it, just

1:26:58

it's a thought in their head. They don't

1:27:00

realize it that their mind

1:27:02

is thinking that thought. Often

1:27:04

it's from their default network. It's not

1:27:06

them trying to think this thought on

1:27:09

purpose. So it's old beliefs. And

1:27:11

there'll be a critical thought about

1:27:14

themselves. So if you catch these thoughts when

1:27:16

they happen, when you say, Oh my gosh,

1:27:18

that was so stupid. Sometimes people

1:27:21

say it out loud, but often it's

1:27:23

quietly, they're telling themselves, you're an idiot.

1:27:25

Why did you say that? You'll never

1:27:27

be loved, etc. That could be one

1:27:29

way of seeing, you know,

1:27:31

some clues of what your limiting

1:27:33

beliefs are. Well, the thing is, again, as soon

1:27:35

as you say that, it's

1:27:39

putting sort of a seed down and you're picking again,

1:27:41

we're talking about habits that becomes a habit. In fact,

1:27:43

I have a good friend who's a

1:27:46

super nice guy, but it's like, you

1:27:49

know, every five or 10 sentences, he says

1:27:51

something critical about himself. And,

1:27:54

you know, in some

1:27:56

ways, I think it's

1:27:58

self-deprecation to be. accepted,

1:28:01

but it's a dangerous thing too because

1:28:03

again, when you make

1:28:05

these statements, that can become reality.

1:28:09

And again, your brain doesn't know the difference between

1:28:11

what you say or think and what

1:28:13

is real. As an example, studies have

1:28:16

been shown that if

1:28:18

you think about exercising your

1:28:20

muscles, they actually

1:28:22

get larger just from the thought

1:28:24

of exercising your muscles. And

1:28:27

this has been shown in a number of studies. And

1:28:30

so when you sit there and say, you know,

1:28:32

I'm worthless, I that was stupid, I'm stupid, I'm

1:28:34

stupid, then that starts getting embedded

1:28:36

and you start believing it. So

1:28:39

what I have done and

1:28:41

try to do for myself because it happens to

1:28:43

all of us is I as soon

1:28:45

as I start to think that

1:28:47

or say it, I say the opposite, or

1:28:50

a statement of affirmation every

1:28:53

time. And what's one of your most favorite

1:28:55

affirmations that you use personally? I

1:28:58

am worthy. You

1:29:02

know, so often, you

1:29:05

know, we have this thing in our head that says,

1:29:07

well, I don't deserve this and versus

1:29:10

yes, I deserve it. I in fact,

1:29:12

I deserve a lot more because I'm

1:29:14

a thoughtful, nice, kind person. And

1:29:17

there's nothing wrong with telling yourself you're

1:29:19

a thoughtful, nice, kind person, if

1:29:22

you are. Now,

1:29:24

I would suggest to you that nothing

1:29:28

is 100%. And there's a subset of people who

1:29:30

probably think I'm a jerk. And

1:29:33

maybe in their world, I am. But

1:29:35

that's okay. You know, I don't know

1:29:37

of anyone who has 100% success rate.

1:29:41

And you know, people carry their own baggage

1:29:43

or biases, which, you

1:29:45

know, make them feel uncomfortable around some people.

1:29:48

As an example, even in my own training, as

1:29:52

a neurosurgeon, You

1:29:55

know, the most competent and probably most

1:29:57

well respected. Teacher

1:30:00

of mine you know was a huge

1:30:02

fan of mine. Ah and you know

1:30:04

when I was worked with him a

1:30:06

things that really well I love respect

1:30:09

for him. He had a lot of

1:30:11

respect for me but there is another

1:30:13

fellow who was insecure about himself and

1:30:15

so he would always have to beat

1:30:18

me up and make comments negative comments

1:30:20

because I was very good at what

1:30:22

I was doing but it made him

1:30:24

feel more comfortable so he had to

1:30:26

be critical and and I felt actually

1:30:29

sorry for the guy. That

1:30:31

he felt he had to do that. But

1:30:33

they're people like that and you sort of

1:30:35

have to understand that. Often times. The

1:30:38

man and with somebody interacts with you.

1:30:41

Often times has nothing to do with you at all. I

1:30:44

in fact, I had a case of

1:30:46

several years ago of a colleague Er

1:30:49

physician much anger the meanest thirties and

1:30:51

we're working on a research project and

1:30:53

I would meet with them every couple

1:30:55

weeks. And to.

1:30:58

Super. Nice guy and we were made

1:31:00

it and it's like out of the blue

1:31:03

he starts an argument about something. It was

1:31:05

completely irrelevant, but it's got no that's not

1:31:07

true. I disagree with that. I don't think

1:31:09

we should do not like look at the

1:31:12

gag on my flight. A complete personality change.

1:31:14

Ama ah And you know what many of

1:31:16

us do often times in those situations we.

1:31:20

Have reacted of like what the hell

1:31:22

are you saying that see and own

1:31:24

you get a this conflict but this

1:31:26

was so unlike him and ah fortunately

1:31:28

I had worked on my own emotion

1:31:31

regulation which has to be non reactive

1:31:33

oftentimes or to be more thoughtful and

1:31:35

I looked him I said you know

1:31:37

this is not like you at all

1:31:39

what's going on with you. And

1:31:43

he looked at me for couple

1:31:45

second city burst into tears A/add

1:31:47

the. And

1:31:49

what had happened was that he had quit

1:31:51

his position and as you know in the

1:31:54

United States you need to get the. A

1:31:57

Gap Insurance, Cobra Insurance.

1:32:00

And he was married young

1:32:02

family, two children, And

1:32:04

he thought that he didn't need to get

1:32:06

it because was expensive and he was getting

1:32:09

this other job and a couple months. So

1:32:11

why get it while? And the answer avast.

1:32:14

His wife ah I found a lump

1:32:16

on her breast. Turned. Out

1:32:18

to be cancers. So now

1:32:20

I had no insurance so.

1:32:24

The driver of his behavior. It

1:32:26

wasn't that bad a research project.

1:32:28

He was terrified and scared. That

1:32:32

was the driver and that that happens

1:32:34

often times to us where we don't

1:32:36

know what's going on with somebody else

1:32:38

and why the react in a certain

1:32:41

way. And this is also the idea

1:32:43

of giving people the benefit of doubt.

1:32:45

Now the rest of his story fortunately

1:32:47

was that. ah, I was able to

1:32:49

help him get retroactive Cobra insurance. He

1:32:52

got it. The breast mass was removed

1:32:54

immediately and treatment and they're fine, but

1:32:56

it just reminds you that you can

1:32:58

never know what is going on. In.

1:33:01

Someone elses head and the other

1:33:03

aspect is also. Ah, I'm sure

1:33:05

you probably been cut off in

1:33:07

traffic by somebody. Who

1:33:09

I. Am a year lease for

1:33:11

a man. I'm sure women would never

1:33:14

do this, but we sometimes use a

1:33:16

hand gestures or prefer have to say

1:33:18

profanity. Ah but

1:33:20

the reason I bring that up as

1:33:22

you know you think about that and

1:33:24

you do get suddenly angry and in

1:33:26

l a tense up and the running

1:33:28

My this person did that but then

1:33:30

a few refrain met and this again

1:33:32

all about perception how it is in your

1:33:35

control to see the world a different

1:33:37

way. If you refrain that and sit

1:33:39

and say well. You know, the passenger

1:33:41

in the car was this guy's wife.

1:33:43

She was nine months pregnant. Her water

1:33:45

broke, she's bleeding. He's tried to get

1:33:48

her to the hospital. Said.

1:33:50

suddenly hope they had you know i

1:33:52

understand what's going on here and i'm

1:33:54

much more i'm not angry anymore i

1:33:56

just hope they get there safely right

1:33:58

but you know my you

1:34:00

can reframe how your mind sees the world.

1:34:03

And I think that's what we all should do. And

1:34:06

part of that is giving people the benefit of

1:34:08

the doubt, hoping

1:34:10

that our actions help others.

1:34:13

All of that will maximize

1:34:15

your ability to manifest because

1:34:18

in some ways it's all about

1:34:20

focusing on

1:34:22

the love aspect of our lives, not

1:34:25

being fearful of our lives. So

1:34:28

would it be fair to say that the

1:34:30

more we're holding on to a victim

1:34:33

narrative, that life is happening to us,

1:34:35

that other people are doing things to

1:34:38

us, that we don't have agency, the

1:34:41

harder genuinely it would

1:34:43

be to manifest our goals and

1:34:45

dreams? Absolutely. I think that's a

1:34:47

great summation. You're actually saying things

1:34:49

much better than I am, so I thank you for

1:34:52

that. So I appreciate that. But I think that's right.

1:34:55

Now, again, as I said earlier, there

1:34:57

are situations that people can't control, but

1:34:59

I think people can

1:35:01

control how they respond to events. And if

1:35:03

every time they respond to an event is,

1:35:06

I'm a victim, this shouldn't have happened

1:35:08

to me, people are taking advantage of

1:35:10

me, I have no control, then

1:35:14

they actually unfortunately manifest

1:35:16

that. And so most

1:35:20

people do have the ability to

1:35:22

take control of different aspects or

1:35:24

see the world in a different way. The very

1:35:26

nature of seeing the world in

1:35:28

a different way actually

1:35:31

increases your ability to manifest. And that's by

1:35:33

not being a victim, but

1:35:36

understanding within you is an immense amount

1:35:38

of power to change your circumstances. And

1:35:41

by using the techniques that I talk about, this

1:35:43

can actually change your life and change your life for the

1:35:45

better. But not only your life,

1:35:48

it changes everyone's life around you. I

1:35:52

was on x.com, formerly

1:35:54

known as Twitter, a few weeks ago,

1:35:56

and I came across this really cool

1:35:58

clip from the CEO of… of Nvidia.

1:36:00

I'm blanking on his name, but this

1:36:02

is now one of the most successful companies

1:36:04

in the world, chip manufacturers, the chip behind

1:36:07

all these AI devices that people are using

1:36:09

in different things. It's funny

1:36:11

you say that because a friend of mine worked

1:36:13

there and about a year ago he said, you

1:36:15

know, Jim, you really need to buy stock in

1:36:17

Nvidia. You

1:36:19

weren't able to manifest that. Yeah. Well, apparently

1:36:22

I chose not to. Well,

1:36:26

one of the things the CEO was saying

1:36:28

in a town hall

1:36:30

that he was doing slash fireside chat

1:36:34

was he said that he's seen since

1:36:37

the earliest part of his career that

1:36:39

when individuals come

1:36:41

in with very high expectations, whether

1:36:44

these are people that

1:36:46

he's mentoring, whether these people

1:36:48

are senior leadership that joins his

1:36:50

team, he said the higher your

1:36:52

expectations are, the less successful you'll

1:36:54

often be with many of these

1:36:56

outcomes. You kind of touched on

1:36:58

this a little bit earlier, but

1:37:00

this idea that we have to

1:37:02

release expectations and be open to

1:37:05

the magic that wants to unfold.

1:37:07

How do we do that? And

1:37:09

how do we straddle both releasing

1:37:12

expectations, but really

1:37:17

having the drive to actually pursue some

1:37:19

of these goals that we want

1:37:22

to achieve in our life, not just for the

1:37:24

betterment of ourselves, but for the people around us?

1:37:26

Well, again, there's nothing wrong with setting goals and

1:37:28

working very hard to accomplish them. I

1:37:31

think that the challenge comes in and there

1:37:33

are two parts of this. One

1:37:36

is to always have

1:37:38

beginner's mind. And what I mean by that

1:37:40

is as somebody gets

1:37:42

expertise in something, they

1:37:44

start closing their mind off to different

1:37:46

possibilities. And

1:37:49

also when someone is firmly

1:37:52

attached to a very, very

1:37:54

specific outcome, then

1:37:58

they're only focused on that. and

1:38:01

not the other possibilities that can allow

1:38:03

them to have success with a

1:38:06

slightly different outcome. And

1:38:08

what I mean by that, it may not be

1:38:10

exactly what they want or

1:38:12

envisioned. It's slightly different, but because they're

1:38:14

so fixated on it being exactly the

1:38:16

way they want, in many ways it

1:38:18

disempowers them. Because one, they're not open

1:38:20

to other options and you have to

1:38:23

always be open to other options. And

1:38:25

this is the nature of beginners mind.

1:38:27

So the goal

1:38:30

is wonderful. It's though believing

1:38:32

that there's only one way to do it

1:38:34

and it's your way that I

1:38:36

think causes people problems. And

1:38:38

I think that's what he's talking about. You know,

1:38:41

they're so fixated on their vision of the goal,

1:38:43

they're not open to any other possibilities. And

1:38:49

being open to possibilities, that's the

1:38:51

magic. Where does magic come from?

1:38:53

My book. Well, it's available

1:38:57

to all of us at any time. It's

1:39:00

just we have to recognize it's with us.

1:39:02

And again, this gets back

1:39:05

to when we talked about

1:39:07

the law of attraction in

1:39:09

some ways, this idea that

1:39:12

it is all in our mind and it's

1:39:14

though our gift to be

1:39:16

able to control our minds. As

1:39:19

you know, I mean these

1:39:22

different mind training techniques are