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1:52

Head of the news team. I

2:01

reckon I could count them on no hands. I'd say

2:04

you are right. Welcome

2:06

for the first time. Thank you so

2:08

much. Too fucking famous and so special.

2:10

Too internationally travelling to be here. Absolutely.

2:14

And that's what I've learned from the best

2:16

offer from you is to be in demand, be hard

2:18

to contact, be hard to get onto. At all

2:20

times. Yeah. So you're nagging

2:22

me. Look, if you

2:24

have to ask. Yeah. If you've read

2:26

Neil Strauss's The Game, I'm sorry for

2:28

you. But now I just want

2:30

to impress you. Oh, come on, please. Can I be funny, Aunty?

2:32

Mm. Oh, is that a

2:34

joke? You've been on adventures. I have been. I've

2:37

been to Rwanda and Tanzania. I've

2:39

heard of both of these places. Yes, absolutely. Me

2:42

too. Before I had gone, I had

2:44

also heard of them. And now I've

2:46

been there. I actually crashed

2:49

my sister and brother-in-law's honeymoon. Yes.

2:52

And... Because

2:54

if there's nothing that makes a

2:56

honeymoon more romantic, when your

2:58

sister shows up. Yeah. But the good

3:00

thing is I know that my brother, Peter, is one to

3:02

keep, because he said, thank you so much for letting me

3:04

come on this holiday with you and your sister, Claire. Because

3:07

my sister, Gemma, planned a fantastic trip for

3:09

me and her, and Peter was there too.

3:12

So great. But they just happened to get married

3:14

beforehand. They happened to get married beforehand, you know.

3:16

That's got a lifetime together. Hayo, how have

3:18

you been? Hello. It

3:21

has been a little while. Last time

3:23

with Jen, it's been a fantastic time.

3:25

I'm in preparation for... Headed to Melbourne

3:27

with the show and all the lovely

3:29

people. I'm so delighted. I'll be there

3:31

for the Easter weekend. My birthday weekend.

3:33

Yeah. I haven't realised. My

3:35

birthday weekend, my birthday is a public holiday. Wow.

3:39

And for the party, whoever wants to, if you

3:41

go that hard out, Saturday, Sunday and

3:43

Monday, you've got off. That's pretty good. You're welcome.

3:46

Thank you so much. I'm happy to help. I

3:48

didn't know you were so close to Albo to be able to organise

3:50

that for. Well, that happened when I was 17 as well. Wow.

3:55

We needed that Monday in grade 12. I thought you

3:57

did. The circle closes. Well,

3:59

I'm so excited. The economy have lost all excited

4:01

for the show. I felt the special guests. I'm

4:03

really excited to be in Melbourne for the company

4:05

for thought that I am start I'm ready for

4:08

I'm ready for news out there. Actually were going

4:10

to put a secret thing in a shine I

4:12

would but I have webs one of that. Deals

4:15

with during it's I'm. A

4:17

desert six percent off. To.

4:20

Get Krakauer. Yeah, I'll put that to

4:22

get code in the show. Notes: And

4:24

I'll see you. Are you gonna read the know? It said

4:26

he pick up you find you push a

4:28

button, click a link supplies to get sick

4:31

Man it's peace a Kgb size off or

4:33

I it because I'm a generous person. Wow,

4:35

I've always said that desert about his son

4:37

of a. Sudden. You could bring some

4:40

land yeah and a day and you're only

4:42

times wanted and you'll look like a really

4:44

good guy. you know as a proud lesbian

4:46

Women give him as your out and I

4:48

and tell you not let it was as

4:50

you know in in in in cui dating

4:52

hundred that works. if we get mad paid

4:54

for. this is actually exactly what happens if

4:56

people success Korea sex level I could sell.

4:58

It's like if you pay for the day

5:00

then they and scurry. Is Vs on her

5:02

mom and I said that I. Thought. It

5:05

would be good bit and I really have much.

5:07

As witnesses it's try not friends.

5:09

I have seen size things on

5:11

style Mcconaughey mama that is why

5:13

was he and see last really

5:16

similar to other subsidizes I this

5:18

the I a big way can

5:20

use the and I think because

5:22

you know you've crisis which a

5:24

presence classes were grateful for. What

5:27

was the news stories of my

5:29

do you are oh my god

5:31

yeah I stop everything. I

5:34

said thank you for asking Axa

5:36

i think it's some is pretty

5:38

foot She was says that I

5:40

am here today because this is

5:42

probably the biggest news story. Oh

5:44

yeah I'm gonna say I am

5:47

united and that is happening in

5:49

it is exciting. Part of you

5:51

love this. You call it a

5:53

city of ah North Queensland council

5:55

because something massive is happening. Is.

5:58

that nonsense famous to

6:00

quote their mayor for crime and

6:03

bad things. Pink

6:06

is finally coming to Townsville this

6:08

weekend. Huge, I know Pink

6:10

is coming, not just

6:12

like because she loves Townsville, I mean, I'm

6:14

sure she will soon, but because there is

6:17

a group called Bring, I think it's Bring

6:19

Pink to Townsville who've been campaigning for over

6:21

a decade to bring her here and

6:23

she's coming and she's doing two sold out concerts. At

6:25

the stadium? At the stadium. Fucking hell.

6:28

Yeah. And someone has even painted a

6:30

mural because they were like, and we're like, I'll do

6:32

it for free on the side of a heritage building.

6:34

And it's like, it's beautiful, you should look it up. It's

6:37

like this gorgeous thing that says Pink. It's

6:39

crazy. People are coming from South Africa apparently.

6:42

Yeah. I love this story.

6:44

I genuinely, I grew up in

6:46

Mackay, so way up there. Yeah.

6:50

For 12 years, this group has campaigned and I

6:52

got to read a little segment on it. This

6:54

has popped up in my own personal Facebook experience

6:56

as well. And there's a little

6:58

quote of a woman who when she found out

7:00

Pink was coming, she pulled over her car and

7:03

broke down crying because she was like, it's finally

7:05

happening. I love it. It's finally happening.

7:07

I love it. And I know we're

7:09

taking the distance from Townsville, but I actually

7:12

love how much Australia loves Pink. I

7:14

don't think there is another country that

7:16

she tours as much. She had so

7:18

many sold out concerts. I only

7:20

found out about this this week and I actually don't think, because

7:22

I feel like it would be, because

7:24

I saw Taylor Swift earlier this year, you guys.

7:27

She saw you. She looked in the crowd

7:30

right at your general seating section.

7:32

Yeah, she said, thank you for coming.

7:36

No, she didn't, I love you. But

7:39

I feel like it's the same thing. It's like that was such a,

7:41

everyone was so excited and so happy. And I feel

7:43

like that's what Townsville, I

7:45

love it. Oh, that's right. A cafe has been making

7:48

all their drinks pink. I just

7:50

feel like it would be such a

7:52

fun vibe of everybody's just happy about

7:54

it. Pop star, that's so nice. You

7:57

mentioned local politics before. what

8:00

the Townsville Mayor, how

8:03

he's going to somehow angle the set he's

8:05

the one that might have. Yeah.

8:08

Like I reckon that'd be, like there's going to be people trying

8:10

to piggyback on the back of the city. There's going to be

8:12

a key to the city. I'm telling you, there's going to be

8:14

a key to the city. Okay Council

8:16

Members, hi it is me, Mayor Mark Williams.

8:18

Yeah Mark, I went to High School with

8:20

the Mayor. Shut up Mercy Williams, wow. Shut

8:22

up Mercy Williams. Wow that's amazing, that's really

8:25

come off good for you Mark. Yeah,

8:27

look I just wanted to, not

8:30

patting anyone specific on the back, but I

8:32

just want to say I've invited a close

8:34

personal friend of mine to Townsville. Pink,

8:38

Pink is coming to Townsville. Oh. Yeah.

8:42

Wow. How did you, sorry

8:44

Mark, because as we went to

8:46

High School together and now work

8:48

together much to my utter delight.

8:50

Because here's the date, which I think is

8:52

kind of funny. This

8:55

is a professional setting please Stanley. Previous

8:57

when we joined the Council. It's fine, me

8:59

and Mark used to date as well. It's

9:01

okay. Okay, this is

9:03

going in Hansard. Okay,

9:06

so we don't need my dating history in Hansard.

9:08

The point is. We definitely don't.

9:10

The point is. We have Hansard for the Townsville City Council. Is

9:13

this an important? We got a

9:15

lot of money for digital technology. Yeah, it's

9:17

very important. But I actually just wanted to

9:20

address this Mark. Because you never

9:22

actually, when I knew you in High School, the

9:24

only CD you owned was

9:26

the Backstreet Boys. So how would you ever be able to,

9:29

how did you get Pink? To be clear, I didn't

9:31

own the Backstreet Boys. I borrowed it and refused to

9:33

return it. Listen, it's

9:35

not power. You stole the Backstreet Boys, is what you say.

9:38

I borrowed it and then I just, I

9:41

like a library book. I just extended

9:43

my reservation. I was wondering where that

9:45

went. I never

9:47

got to put it on my shelf again and

9:50

say, hey everybody, Backstreet.

9:55

You're right. I've been such

9:58

a fool. Listen, I think. that

10:00

me bringing pink to town hall and me

10:02

alone, it is not a team of

10:05

Reddit Instagram inspired sleuths online

10:07

who's helped me find the

10:10

job and a time like that.

10:12

Promoter had nothing. No, no, me and Mike do

10:14

go way back. We actually also dated in high

10:16

school, but Michael's had nothing to do

10:18

with this as well. I have

10:20

brought pink on my own back. How did you get a number?

10:25

From a mutual friend of ours. A mutual.

10:27

You have a mutual friend with pink. Who's

10:29

that? So you're a mutual friend with pink.

10:31

I'll be honest. It's a mum's

10:33

group. A mum's group?

10:35

A mum's group. Is that

10:37

Townsville Mothers for the Return

10:39

of Pink or Timofrupa? It

10:43

is Timofrupa. Wow. I will

10:45

be honest. We have been working as a community contingent,

10:47

but a lot of the work has been done with

10:49

me. It wasn't a loan thing, is what you're saying.

10:51

It was definitely a loan thing for me to text

10:53

pink with the details that they provided. OK.

10:57

Sorry, I'm just so curious

10:59

because you've never organised

11:01

anything in this. We've tried to get

11:04

a community Christmas tree for the last

11:06

15 years and you always

11:08

said, yeah, yeah, yeah, it's just too many.

11:10

It's a cardboard card out of Jonathan Thurston

11:12

holding a torch. You're like, look, the angel

11:14

right there. We don't need a tree. He's

11:16

our saviour. My point is

11:18

that you won't do anything. Like you can't

11:21

you know, we've tried to organise just a

11:23

council clean up for all the white goods

11:25

we've got everywhere. And you're like, it's too

11:27

high. How do you organise an international pop

11:29

star to fly all the way to Townsville?

11:31

Bring her into. She has a trapeze set,

11:33

Mark. She has a trapeze set. She will be up

11:35

on the spider cam for the

11:38

cows. How did you get the North Queensland

11:40

cowboys to say you had a stadium for

11:42

a weekend during the season? Yeah. We're

11:44

all mates, OK? A lot of us dated

11:46

in high school. Have you

11:48

seen what's gone on other pink concerts? A

11:51

child was nearly born at

11:53

a pink concert recently. I think

11:56

that that is a real concern for me as well.

11:58

So I know that we've got a lot. of

12:00

women who are pregnant in

12:02

Townsville and they might turn up to

12:04

the concert. Because if there's one thing that Pink's music

12:06

is known for, it's inducing

12:09

life. Absolutely.

12:11

Three of my four children were

12:14

born to So What? It

12:17

is the best song. It is. I,

12:19

as Mayor, again, am

12:22

afraid that if this goes

12:25

ahead, the reason we've not had Pink for 12

12:27

years is because we already

12:29

have one water park on the strand.

12:33

And if this goes ahead, we might possibly

12:35

have two. Because of all the

12:37

water breaking. We do not currently have enough

12:40

infrastructure to handle that amount of

12:42

water in one location. Fucking,

12:48

what a journey. A water park. A

12:51

water park from the water's breaking.

12:54

It's disgusting. Disgusting.

12:56

Awful. This

12:58

news this week that really blew my mind, private

13:00

schools in Australia are fighting the government because no,

13:02

no, no, we want the right to

13:04

hire based upon our beliefs.

13:08

And the government's kind of like going, we

13:10

might need to look into that because there's been

13:12

a fair amount of investigations over

13:14

the last couple of years about this

13:17

kind of thing. I

13:19

went to one of these schools. Yeah, so I went to

13:22

one of these schools and I remember these kind of news letters coming

13:24

home. They were hand-typed back then. Mm-hmm. But

13:26

yeah, it was during the debate.

13:29

It was when homosexuality was still

13:32

illegal in Queensland. Right.

13:34

You know, they were typing these letters

13:36

about we, of course, you know, and

13:39

what's true then is true now. It's like,

13:41

well, hang on a second. The

13:45

love everybody, walk with the lepers,

13:47

you know, you are created in

13:50

the image thing. Mm-hmm. Applies

13:53

until it is inconvenient.

13:55

Yeah. And that just

13:58

blows my mind. they

14:00

want to base their hiring practices upon

14:02

their beliefs. But they

14:05

really pick and choose those

14:07

beliefs. The whole idea that you

14:10

can take like pretty, like you're

14:12

a church, so you're tax free and

14:14

your private school is not only to take

14:16

massive fees, you also take a pretty decent

14:18

tax break. And also get a

14:21

huge amount of government funding. Like we

14:23

wouldn't allow any other tax dollar to

14:25

be spent on something that is unlawful,

14:28

would we? Like this is against the

14:30

law for everyone, except those people and we give the

14:32

money for it. I don't get that

14:35

part. Like that's the thing

14:37

I don't, I can't get my head around it,

14:39

that your pretend sky friend is telling you. So

14:41

everybody, I'm so thrilled we're here at

14:43

book club. And I

14:46

know that we all agreed that

14:48

we're gonna read a really important

14:50

book. I've been reading essentially pamphlets,

14:53

you know, like these tiny little, 200, 300 pages, and

14:57

I get through them on the weekend, John Grisham,

14:59

big whoop. You know, sure he saved

15:01

us from a loose nuke, great. But I'm done with

15:04

it by Saturday afternoon. I want something that I can

15:06

really sink my teeth into. Great,

15:08

I've got good news. What? I've been

15:11

reading a book that I have simply loved. Okay.

15:13

And you might get into it, Small Chapters. Yeah.

15:16

It's called The Bible. I

15:19

read it online, I checked the Amazon reviews and

15:21

said it's the good book, me good book. Oh,

15:23

wait, can I have a look? That is good

15:25

news. I need to. Sorry, who's

15:27

the author of that one? There's a

15:29

bunch of guys. They don't know. Well, not

15:32

technically. I mean, you know, Mark, Luke, Jacob,

15:34

John. Some are called Leviticus. Yeah, this one

15:37

says that the first part there actually, there's a lot

15:39

of debate as to if it was

15:41

written by someone or if it was just someone

15:43

who's- I

15:45

think James sorted all that out. Yeah,

15:48

it does seem, I mean, it does

15:50

seem a little bit patchy. Sorry,

15:52

a little bit patchy in places. Oh, there's not a

15:54

continuous- Oh, it's a sort of like, you know

15:56

that book we read the other day that was sort of like a

15:58

bunch of different characters all having a- And

16:01

then at the end it all comes to kind of like ties together.

16:03

Yes, the slap. We love that. We love

16:05

the slap. We love the slap. The

16:07

American version was not as good. No. We're

16:09

talking about the book, not the TV series.

16:11

Oh, I... I always read the book. You

16:15

don't. I don't watch the film

16:17

and pretend... You go straight to the film. Well, how

16:19

dare you. How dare you. You know I don't have

16:21

time. Okay, anyway, back to... So there's lots of

16:23

characters. There's lots of

16:25

characters. Okay, fantastic. But it's based

16:27

on one guy. And it's

16:29

sort of like a family drama. So like

16:32

the dad is there. And then like,

16:34

I mean... How

16:36

does the dad show love to the main

16:39

character? It's sort of

16:41

like very full on.

16:43

I won't lie. Well, part one and

16:45

part two are different because part one, from

16:47

what I've read on, you know... Oh, you've read... It's

16:49

so good. I haven't read the book. I've read, you

16:51

know... Well, I've read the first part as a child.

16:54

She watches the movie. She also watches the movie. The

16:57

second part wasn't really... I didn't know it was a part actually as a

16:59

child. It was only the first

17:01

part. That was the end. Yeah. The fifth

17:03

one. You have to. You've got to check

17:05

it out. I mean, the sequel, it is a

17:08

bit... You know, they did pump the budget up

17:10

a little bit. It's a lot more scary, a

17:12

lot more horror. It's more way more right. Way

17:14

more right. Interesting. It's Swords

17:16

and Sandals. Yeah, okay. In

17:20

terms of kind of like... It's a

17:23

familiar relationship. There's a baby. I'm sorry,

17:25

I won't spoil. Who's the dad? But

17:27

it's so much fun. But that only comes from halfway through. No,

17:30

no, no. That's the thing. That's the thing. I didn't get

17:32

to the baby part. Mine ended before the baby. You've

17:34

got to get to the baby part. Oh, mate. In

17:36

the second part... I

17:39

can find it. What's the movie of both? I've

17:43

turned up for book club and I don't want to appear done,

17:45

so I watch both versions. So the first

17:47

part, Star, Chilton, Heston. Being

17:50

special effects, a lot of oceans moving around. Second

17:52

part, amazing, is about a boy who gets everything

17:54

he always wants for Christmas because he just asked

17:56

his dad, which is also him. It's

17:59

awesome. The bit about it since he

18:01

kept his bike as he gets eight prawns. you

18:03

don't think so many lives like he didn't the

18:05

first part. the mods or that's like a stunt

18:07

like you can sell you don't have since. Yeah,

18:10

not to that. Some I get a revised the

18:12

rules a bit of a bit. it's likely will

18:14

wells. Sort of let the rules of the said

18:16

siloed sang. Yeah it is. It's very kind of

18:18

like you know when you read of an old his

18:20

first book and then they go back into the second

18:22

book and eight sputtering clarify been to Stop That you

18:25

have very much like that. If you have to read

18:27

the first one I would sites are you know that

18:29

have you mind open a little bit and don't approach

18:31

the second one little a small thing. As

18:34

long as much as the smiles is not

18:36

quite, the fight scenes aren't quite as good

18:38

as gonna thrive Zola when that like with

18:41

some not so many like to thousands of

18:43

people being smith and like proper like was

18:45

brimstone and Fire and and Deaths since the

18:47

angel of death doesn't show up quite as

18:50

often. So

18:52

in that way, it's actually better than the slap. Yeah,

18:56

I absolutely did that for me is.

18:58

That an entire chapter is dedicated to counting

19:00

people Could I loved that part of the

19:02

says lives in i sit sit sit they

19:05

literally they know zoo is part of what

19:07

family on that side and then I just

19:09

keep telling you that mrs really to have

19:11

my brain. I really enjoy just knowing who

19:13

everyone loves to use that we read that

19:15

Russian book the other way and it was

19:17

like they're all his books and the same

19:20

mean I. I enjoy when I. Did nobody

19:22

begets anyone in this one? is

19:24

that your data navigating nine Nine

19:26

nine percent are there are loads.

19:29

I do namely says as quite

19:31

special effects attacked as someone walking

19:33

is. Is. A parting of the see. A

19:36

nod and I walks on water than

19:38

this one rather than I am somewhat

19:40

I different. Got a difference on wow,

19:42

different guy. Said. same guy dare to

19:44

like for to the but you know how i

19:46

can load of the rings yes said the sort of

19:48

like this is the world and these the characters and

19:51

then you can dive into the stories as it's sort

19:53

of the be like that because you've got expressing had

19:55

was summoned for being suspended for christmas bit as

19:57

my say it's i mean i know i'm a

19:59

sucker for those just hokey Hallmark

20:01

films. But I gotta say it's

20:04

a little treat for me. It's

20:06

pretty good. The ending is a bit... Oh,

20:09

it didn't look the end it. Spoiler alert! What

20:12

do you want? I want to follow. Well, how can I

20:14

put this to you? It's got

20:17

a pretty happy ending. Because just when

20:19

you think, it's all over,

20:21

that can't end it like this. You

20:24

just wait a couple of days, mate. Yeah. You just wait a

20:26

couple of days. Yeah. And then... No,

20:28

no, you're spoilt. Okay. Oh, oh, oh.

20:31

Oh, oh, oh. It's like a water twist. A

20:33

lot. All right, okay, all right. Put it on

20:35

the list. I'll give it a go. I'll give it

20:37

a go. You're gonna really, you're

20:39

gonna be surprised. All right. You're gonna be surprised

20:41

at how much you're gonna... I'll

20:44

tell you what you're gonna really love. You're

20:46

gonna really love this weekend. Because

20:48

the reason we've got a public holiday this whole

20:50

weekend... Oh, yeah, it's in the book. It's because

20:52

of this book. It's amazing.

20:55

Wow. It's also how... There

20:57

was nothing in the book about not being able to

20:59

buy a beer. No, yeah. On the day, but for

21:01

some reason we can't buy beer on the day. I

21:04

looked really hard for that. Yeah, I think there might

21:06

be like a third one coming. I think the author

21:08

maybe didn't finish it. Ah, I'm not sure. Yeah. So,

21:10

I mean, you know, all of those

21:12

series... There is a third one. There is

21:14

a third one. It's in Utah. Oh, really?

21:16

Yeah, a bloke called Joseph Smith wrote that

21:18

one. Yeah, he found it in a hat.

21:21

Yeah. Oh my God. That feels a bit like,

21:23

you know, why the time they get to the third book, it's gone

21:25

a little off the rails. It's a bit too far, you

21:27

know? You'd think that. No, but it's really good. Okay.

21:30

Millions of people wouldn't. All right. Okay.

21:32

All right. Fine. Put it on the list. You have

21:34

to read it. Done. What

21:37

are we going to read next week? I've heard great

21:39

things about Sarah J. Maas. Great.

21:47

I'm making

21:50

the right reference.

21:54

No, Sarah J. Maas. Is it like, is

21:57

it Akata? Like fantasy romance? I

22:00

know man, but I loved it. Great. I

22:02

went to the school, the primary school

22:04

I went to, the, you know, the

22:06

religious primary school, I went to had

22:08

that book club. My

22:11

mum worked in the eighties. Not many

22:13

other mums worked. And

22:15

not only that, my mum was older

22:18

than everybody else's mum. It was Brisbane.

22:20

So everybody else's mum had had their children when

22:22

they were 18. So

22:24

my mates, when I was nine and 10,

22:26

were like 28, 29. It

22:30

was that, Stacy's mum has got it.

22:32

It was that. They were like, and

22:34

my mum's like mid-forties. And she's

22:37

working hard for the money. So hard for

22:39

it, honey. And she'd come to pick me

22:42

up and all the other ladies are like

22:44

hot, smoking alpine. You know,

22:46

talking about books. Talking about

22:48

books in front of their holding corridors in Kenmore. So

22:52

yeah, that was very real. What

22:55

we just talked about. Like

22:58

a dike of truth through time. So

23:01

Hayden, in a minute, you got a story about, it's

23:03

another story about schools. Another story about schools. Is

23:06

it a story about vaping? No.

23:08

Is it a story about underage sex? It's not.

23:11

Is it a story about phones in schools? It's not. It

23:14

is about spears, weapons.

23:17

Oh. And the threats of violence to

23:19

principals. What? Back

23:24

in a moment. We're

23:51

told about the iconic Atlanta street party.

23:54

And don't miss FX's Shogun, a reimagining

23:56

of the epic tale, starring Anisa

23:58

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25:21

This is NTNNNNN with

25:24

Claire Cavanaugh and Hayden Wright, Podboy.

25:27

Huge Podboy. Hayden Wright.

25:33

We are at the Melbourne International Quality Festival

25:36

from the 28th of March. A 50% off a code is

25:38

in the show notes. Get amongst it. One

25:40

final story from you, Haydo. We're talking

25:42

about schools. We're talking about schools. Now

25:45

since 2011, there's been research done

25:48

about the amount of violence that

25:50

is happening in schools and

25:52

would you be surprised, it has

25:54

steadily increased since that time and

25:57

principals this year as part of the most recent

25:59

research. have up some ones upwards

26:02

of like 48 50%

26:04

of increase of threats of violence and

26:06

physical violence to themselves teachers

26:09

and support who's making the threats

26:11

the students are it's there are

26:13

angry teens becoming more and

26:15

more angry and the reason I love this story

26:17

is that I thought we were in this sort

26:19

of new wave of parenting this sort of like

26:22

gentle parenting like hey you know what we're gonna

26:24

put that down this is a boundary that we've

26:26

said and it turns out there's more violence in

26:28

schools than there have been in the last yeah

26:30

since 2011 holy moly

26:33

principles have had knives pulled on them

26:35

there are spears in the schools

26:38

and one of the things that this

26:40

is my favorite part of the story is like if you go

26:42

five paragraphs down one of the principal says

26:44

the one of the other things that is increasing

26:46

stress in this world of sort of highly violent

26:49

students is helicopter parents

26:52

emailing and texting at like 7 38 39 30 p.m. at night and

26:56

then being on the phone first thing the next

26:58

morning about why haven't you done anything about this

27:00

message you received last night so principles

27:03

are just being pulled real port and it's

27:05

why I'm sure that email that you shared

27:07

earlier if like they see a thing in

27:09

the news about oh this now I gotta

27:11

get some of this it's

27:13

a high-stress situation and now with the

27:15

increase of violence as well it's also

27:17

there on the front line principles across

27:19

Australia are stressed fucking

27:22

hell did you ever have violence

27:24

in your school so I

27:26

went to a public school but

27:29

it was an all-girls selective school so there

27:32

was no violence I

27:35

think the the worst thing that ever sort

27:37

of happened was that girls cried because

27:40

they got under 90 on their like

27:43

English exam and like

27:45

would would just be crying to the teacher about

27:47

that there was no physical so yeah I

27:50

can't this kind of

27:53

thing it's like I'm

27:55

like violence in schools

27:59

so yeah None of that. Far

28:01

out. How about you? Had I like

28:03

up in Mackay? Yeah. Oh, it

28:05

was Raffaes. I can't remember. I knew

28:07

we were the worst of it. You

28:09

weren't a bloody regulator, weren't you? Odd

28:11

boy. Right. It's fun. So

28:14

school, and I'm talking, I'm thinking early 2000s. Oh,

28:16

yeah. Yeah, what was high school? How about, what

28:18

were we talking? High school, I mean, we had

28:20

kids on a regular basis, I think. There

28:23

were like fights that happened outside of

28:25

the school fence. So it

28:27

was made very clear to us

28:29

that if you were to have a disagreement

28:31

with anyone, you were not to have it

28:33

in school grounds. And so because the school

28:35

grounds was essentially like, this is our turf,

28:37

outside of your turf. But right

28:40

across the road from us, there was like

28:42

a huge, essentially like patch of grass that

28:44

every year we'd use for like school sports

28:46

and things like that. And

28:48

one of my favorite memories is that

28:50

as the plovers were starting to sort

28:52

of like nest, all of

28:54

the grass would grow really tall, because none of the

28:56

people mowing wanted to go and like be swooped. And

28:58

so this tall grass plovers around and two

29:01

kids in this cooking form, like ripping each

29:03

other's backpacks and swinging each other around. I

29:05

don't think they landed a single punch, but

29:07

it was just like this beautiful ballet of

29:10

schoolboy violence, just like whipping them in

29:12

a circle. It was like watching the

29:14

end of, what's that movie

29:16

where all of the rose petals are cancelled,

29:19

actually, nevermind. American Beauty. American Beauty.

29:21

Terrible people make great art. He didn't write

29:23

the film, he was just in it. That's

29:25

very true. And I tell you what,

29:27

it was terrible art. What I saw, I just read

29:29

from my public books. So it

29:32

was like the plastic bag in

29:34

American Beauty. So captivating, like

29:36

felt like it was slow motion. But

29:39

unlike American Beauty, nobody filming because of

29:41

time for the camera phones. Yeah. Hey,

29:44

you might have had a Motorola raise a flip. I

29:46

had one of those. The camera didn't

29:48

work well, but you could try. And

29:50

if you accidentally went onto the internet,

29:52

you had no credit for the rest

29:54

of the money. Maybe

29:57

that's why violence is increasing. That

30:00

you just saying that reminded me the

30:02

other week I I've in my part-time jobs I

30:04

work with kids and I was talking to this

30:07

I reckon she was like 13 year old and

30:09

she was like Texting me to Fran and we

30:11

were like, oh what's going on? She was like, oh There's

30:14

a fight happening at school and I'm missing it and we went oh

30:16

no And she was like, yeah

30:19

She was explaining it all and it turns

30:21

out that that these boys were fighting over

30:23

her over which who she only wanted to

30:25

give her Snap to one of them and

30:27

they all wanted it and then she told

30:29

us about the fight the next week It was

30:31

happening because she'd agreed to go to like the

30:33

school disco with another boy and another one wanted

30:35

it But it turns out we were like hang

30:37

on a second Why is that fight happening next

30:39

week when this this event happened to it? She's

30:41

like, oh there's a fight every Wednesday High

30:45

school. She's like every Wednesday. There's a fight and we're

30:47

like, are you the cause of most of these fights?

30:49

She's like maybe

30:52

I was just like love this energy from you. But yeah, I

30:54

was like shocked that there was like she's like every Wednesday

30:57

There has to be a fight The

30:59

thing that I'm getting about these stories is that it's

31:01

not kid on kid violence like kid on

31:03

principal violence Yeah my

31:05

favorite so the reason that this I wanted to

31:08

bring this story in is because we the person

31:10

who was the de-escalator

31:12

in our school was our PE teacher and

31:14

he's this big guy like you We

31:17

used to run gauntlet where kids had

31:19

run down between two cones with lines

31:21

of other kids Pegging just like real

31:23

hard throwing tennis balls He

31:30

is this like big like built dude

31:32

who was also like a IT The

31:38

he would he was usually the one that they

31:40

would send in to like break up the big

31:42

fight So if anything did happen here comes, you

31:44

know, mr. Whoever the PE teacher I don't want

31:47

to say his name because I'm scared

31:49

of him 20

31:51

years later Yeah, the most upsetting thing that I think

31:53

that was about that PE teacher was he was the

31:55

one who taught me how to do a forward roll

31:58

So he told me how to like and like get

32:00

small and then when he would pop out and just

32:02

be like this big it was like watching um like

32:06

90s cartoons like Cara's on a couple

32:08

of times, he would

32:10

have this like attack sound it

32:12

was incredible and I think that the solution

32:14

to this problem is more PE teachers

32:16

in school. I'm

32:19

old enough to know that I'm old

32:21

enough to have been hit by my

32:23

teachers. Wow yeah we were the last

32:25

cohort through where corporate punishment was a

32:27

completely fine way to deal with misbehavior

32:29

so we would never fuck

32:31

with our teachers. I would never threaten my

32:33

teacher with a spear. I'm

32:36

not saying we should be allowed to hit

32:38

kids again. Sounds like that's what you're saying,

32:40

Ash. But you know it's the reason

32:42

you know I think the Americans would call it

32:44

force projection when you park an aircraft carrier in

32:46

the Gulf it's like hey we're just sitting here.

32:48

Nobody started anything all right. That's

32:51

a very teen kid thing to be like

32:53

I'm just waving my arms. I'm just throwing

32:56

my hands over here. Yeah, you're getting the

32:58

white. Excuse

33:02

me sir. Sir, um,

33:05

Principal Tenner.

33:08

Uh, I just wanted to let you know that uh that

33:12

Marty says you've got to meet him on the oval across

33:14

the road after school. You've got to

33:16

meet him on the oval across the road after school. I

33:19

have to meet Marty. You have to meet Marty. Look at

33:21

him, he's a fucking chicken. I told you he's a fucking chicken. I'm

33:24

not a chicken. Just, Marty, just,

33:26

just chill for a second okay.

33:28

I'm handling it. If a child

33:31

needs support from their principal, I'm

33:33

there. Sir, sir

33:35

you need, oh my gosh, does he, do I have

33:37

to smell everything? He's so dumb. It's Wednesday, he should

33:39

know. Yeah, it's Wednesday, sir. You know what

33:41

happens on Wednesday? Is it about the

33:43

fight? Yeah, and it's, it's you,

33:46

Marty, look Marty pissed off. Marty's

33:48

pissed off that you let, that

33:50

you let board win the sports

33:52

carnival even though clearly that you

33:54

know the red house had more. It

33:56

was a cheat, sir. It was a cheat. And

33:58

so Marty, it was a cheat. So

34:00

now we're here on behalf of Marty and you

34:03

have to meet him after

34:05

the last bell. I can't spell it out any further

34:07

for you sir. Yeah, no I

34:10

fully understand. Let me just reach

34:12

into my backpack. I'm going to pull out my boxing gloves.

34:14

Now Marty... Woah, woah sir. Do

34:17

you think you can... Do you not

34:19

know the rules? Of

34:21

the Wednesday fights? Yeah. Fight on

34:23

school grounds. You can't do that right now.

34:25

Oh, so sorry. You may... You like literally

34:27

said we can't have fights on school grounds. You can't

34:30

have fights on school grounds. So why do you... You

34:32

can't have boxing gloves? I'm going to tell... They are

34:34

recreational. They're recreational

34:36

boxing gloves. I use them

34:38

to increase my dexterity when drinking hot beverages. This

34:40

is a recreational spear. Alright. Oh, thank

34:43

you so much for bringing that. It looks like a historical

34:45

piece. Yeah, yeah. I'm here to fuck shit up. Because

34:47

it's Wednesday. Karen, do you have to wait until

34:49

the school grounds? Just wait, okay. And Marty said

34:52

he's going to fight. Marty's week is to fight

34:54

this week. You can pick next Wednesday, okay? Like

34:56

I need you to just respect the rules. Mate,

34:58

that fucking PE teacher, the way he

35:00

rolls, pops up. Yeah, okay. You

35:03

think she's so fucking great. I know. You've

35:05

got to wait. She's not. Oh, you

35:07

can do computers. Wait until I've finished

35:09

organizing this fight with Marty.

35:12

Terry here, I've actually got a feedback for you if

35:14

you'd like. If you'd just like to maybe even write

35:16

on when you'd like that fight to occur, I can

35:18

pass that on to Mr. Davidson. Oh, yeah, thank you.

35:20

Mr. Davidson. You

35:24

said the PE teacher, is that right? Yeah, yeah, Mr. Davidson. Okay,

35:26

alright. I can organize that with the PE teacher. Have

35:28

you got your clicky pen, the one that smells nice? Yeah,

35:31

there you go. Thank you so much.

35:33

Alright, so after the final bell, Wednesday afternoon, I

35:35

am to meet Marty across the road. To

35:38

be clear, that is outside of school grounds. Outside

35:40

school grounds. And I can bring this. It's

35:42

so... Oh my gosh, you can't bring it. Is that... It's

35:45

of a tongue. I have a... So,

35:50

is that a sabre behind you as well? Oh,

35:54

you're admiring this, the school ceremonial

35:56

sabre? I did have it sharpened, yes. school

36:00

ground? Yes, so you can't have that. Why do you bring

36:02

out a baton on school ground? You can't do that. It's

36:05

simply decorative. I use it to pick up trash

36:07

when I'm on my school lunch

36:09

rounds. I have also sharpened the tip

36:11

of this. I just

36:13

want to make it clear. I'm the principal. I

36:15

know the rules. And I'm also

36:17

aware of the rules of fly

36:20

by night outside of school grounds, bare

36:23

knuckle brawls. Okay, and you know you have to bring someone?

36:26

A second. You have to bring a second. What kind of... I'm

36:29

his second, and he's my second.

36:32

Let me just quickly... So I'm my second. Let

36:34

me just quickly... Oh, no, Mrs. Martin subbed out.

36:37

Okay. I will have...

36:39

Oh, he's gonna pick. Yeah. Because

36:41

he doesn't back himself. The wuss is gonna pick Davidson.

36:43

He's gonna... You can't pick Davidson. What do you mean?

36:45

You can't pick Davidson. You can't pick Davidson because he's

36:47

the... So you can't pick

36:49

Davidson. Yeah, right. I did watch

36:51

what he did. He's gonna pick Davidson. He's gonna pick

36:54

Davidson. He's gonna pick Davidson. He's gonna pick Davidson. He's

36:56

gonna pick Davidson. Yeah, right. He... I

36:59

did watch what he did on Sports Day. Look,

37:01

if I can't have Mr. Davidson, may I have

37:03

Ms. Creeber? You want Ms. Creeber?

37:05

Hi, Mr. Creeber. Did somebody call my

37:07

name? Hello, Ms. Creeber. Oh! Wow.

37:10

Mr. P, Mr. P, how are you? I'm very well. I'm

37:13

very well. I'm just talking about a second. Hi, boys.

37:16

How are you? Yeah, pretty good. Like, you've gotta hit very

37:18

quickly. Have you just got to use Snap or something? Oh,

37:20

that's a rude question to ask. Love

37:24

to see you, Ms. Creeber. How has the

37:26

indoor rock climbing been going? Oh, it has

37:28

been going. Oh! Wonderful.

37:31

Now, that's a grip. I

37:34

would actually love Ms. Creeber to be my second

37:36

voice. Is that all right? Ms. Creeber, do you

37:38

understand what's happening? I do. I am

37:40

going to punch the living shit out of you

37:42

or whichever one of your stupid little

37:44

friends. Marty, Ms. Creeber. Marty!

37:47

Oh, gosh! I would love to absolutely rip

37:49

the balls off that small idiot. Ms.

37:52

It's... Now,

37:54

don't talk back to Ms. Creeber. Okay. What?

37:56

Please do not talk back to Ms. Creeber. But is

37:58

it... There's the

38:00

rules that he made after 315, after the bill.

38:04

We have to go across the street, dodge

38:06

plovers, go through the dark grass, the deep

38:08

grass, and that's when it gets

38:10

on. And you can't step in as a second until he hits

38:12

the ground and goes, I need my second.

38:14

He's got a call for you. You can't just...

38:16

That's okay. Have you seen this guy? Well,

38:19

that's inappropriate. I've been... It's

38:22

a pool day. It's a what day? It's

38:24

a pool day. What's a pool day? It's compared

38:26

to a push day. Oh, man. At

38:28

the gym, I'm doing a lot of pooling recently. You know, we do a

38:30

lot of rock climbing. I'm a pooler. We pool and

38:32

push every single day. Every single day.

38:35

Wow. God, that's why I respect him. Can I take over as

38:37

his first and he can be my second instead? Or

38:40

is that the rule? You'll have to just be in the out of combat. All

38:43

right. I'll meet you after school before the

38:45

fight with Marty. 315,

38:47

after the bill. No weapons

38:50

until you're out to the school grounds. Okay, Terrence, thank you. You're

38:53

going to be the arbiter of this one, all right? You're welcome.

38:55

I'll just get Mr. Davis. He's got the whistle. Oh,

38:58

yeah. I

39:03

flashed back so hard to my

39:05

primary school again when one of

39:07

my teachers is in Brisbane. I

39:10

don't know, man, like in Brisbane,

39:12

the cops would sell old

39:14

cop cars. Oh, yeah. I

39:16

guess. And they were painted in a particularly

39:18

reflective kind of paint. So they'd pull all

39:21

the police off the sides, but

39:23

it was afford. It

39:26

looked it was reflective. You

39:28

know, you'd be the sun. Yeah, it was a

39:30

little brighter in the relief of police. And

39:32

this particular teacher drove one of these

39:34

things. And then

39:36

one of the music teachers would be getting

39:39

a lift to work with

39:41

him. It became pretty obvious. I think now

39:43

it's like, hang on. I mean,

39:46

now 40 years later, they

39:48

were rooting. Yeah, they

39:50

come in that cop car. Yeah.

39:54

We think, yeah, mustache and

39:56

they also have the lights on the whole time.

40:00

And he had a piece on, didn't he? Red,

40:02

all red, only red. I loved it. You called

40:04

it a love van. I had it because I

40:06

went to school at a time when you could

40:08

get this trap. You could absolutely. There

40:11

was a teacher. I was telling her to Audrey the other

40:13

day. She was a bit blown away.

40:15

Like, our bag racks

40:17

were on this side. And our lockers

40:19

were on that side. It was a long corridor, right? And

40:22

the way to get into

40:24

the classroom is on the left. And so I

40:27

went from the locker, locked my locker, picked

40:29

up my books, went to turn with my

40:31

back to the period change to put my

40:33

stuff in my bag. And this one particular

40:35

teacher who was like, don't

40:37

you fuck them all in front of me, Ginsburg. My

40:41

favorite one was like, it's Ginsburg, sir. Don't you fuck

40:43

every time. Every time. And

40:45

it was like, if you fucking wanna

40:47

go, we'll step outside school grounds at 305. I'm

40:50

a black belt champion and I will mess you

40:52

up. Do you wanna challenge me? Is that what

40:54

you're saying? Because I will show you what respect

40:56

looks like. This is in 1989. Yeah,

40:59

fuck yeah. Wow. He

41:02

had hands like house bricks. Like he could have fucked me

41:04

right up. But he,

41:06

like that's the way he rattled. He was like, you

41:08

walked in front of me. So therefore I'm gonna threaten

41:10

you, a child with violence. But

41:14

hey, we had a school song. Yeah,

41:16

I think there's a reason that this reporting started in

41:18

2011. Just

41:21

long enough for those guys to be like, you know what,

41:23

I do wanna commit fully to my martial art. Or

41:27

maybe like some sort of statute of limitations

41:29

pass. Yeah, yeah. Thanks for coming in, guys.

41:31

Thanks so much for having me. Really fun,

41:33

I appreciate it. I'm very much

41:35

looking forward to our moment. We're on a late now.

41:38

Yeah. When we were in 7.30. Yeah. I

41:41

feel like the show suits more

41:43

of a rowdy late night. Like you

41:45

go and see you're really well crafted, perfectly

41:47

put together, stand up power at seven or

41:49

eight. And then you're like, okay, I've had

41:51

two beers. I'm ready to like pretend to

41:53

be smart and listen to some news, but

41:55

actually just watch two people pretend to follow

41:57

the stage. There's a bar in our room. Like

42:00

there's inside that you don't have to be

42:03

in the room. There's a bar in the

42:05

back of the room. Feels perfect for the vibe

42:07

of the show. We're pretending to

42:09

be high class, we're a proper venue but also...

42:11

Dick jokes. Yeah. So many.

42:13

It's gonna get rowdy. It's gonna get classy

42:15

once. Classy once. And we'll

42:18

have just as many flap jokes as

42:20

dick jokes, you know? It's important. It's

42:22

equal opportunity comedy. Exactly. Come

42:25

to the Greek, it's gonna be incredible. It's gonna be fun.

42:30

Thank you so much for coming. Thank you. Thank

42:32

you. I'm glad to be just another notch on

42:34

your belt of podcast. Podboy!

42:37

Pod. Butt. Pod.

42:40

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